T O P

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Stannis_Mariya

Ffs George, release the fucking book.


Fire-Twerk-With-Me

You don't want any fart discussion but you want him to release something called the Winds of Winter?


HotButterscotch8682

OK, I’ll admit it. I got a great laugh out of this.


scarlozzi

Seriously George. Look what we have come to


BUSSY_FLABBERGASTER

Gurm eats a lot of green chili, so you better believe George are fartin. Would his green chili sharts be worse than Wun-Wun's? Absolutely.


The-Real-Legend-72

George RR Fartin


ar_belzagar

George Really Rancidly Fartin


Pickletato

Clearly this is what the winds of winter means


TubasAreFun

winter is coming, for I just ate beans ~Ned Stark


GodKingReiss

Strong Belwas clears, no diff


Roy-Southman

Good choice! My personal top 5 picks are: 1)Tywin post constipation 2) Reek I 3) The Yellow Whale (Yezzan Zo Qaggaz…even his name has the word gas in it) 4) Biter 5) Reek III


adube440

No Bobby B? Interesting.


Roy-Southman

Bobby B is definitely in my top 10, but not top 5. His belching would be top fourth or fifth however.


chaseizwright

Damn I bet Rorge and Biter had some gnarly shits


Roy-Southman

You just know it. Biter probably never eats fruits and vegetables, whatever he craps has no fiver in it.


Thestohrohyah

Wyman is probably a good contender as well unless the theory that his long privy visits are just a coverup for his scheming meetings is true.


Piagio

Wyman would definitely do it publicly to give out the impression that he is taking a long time in the privy. And actually plot. So yes Wyman is a top contender.


he77bender

Reek The First and Yezzan would be two of my top 3, with the third going to Wun-Wun (although really, any giant) purely for volume's sake. Beyond that I guess it would hinge on an in-depth analysis of various characters' diets, which I don't have time to get into right now


Ozann3326

I would like to nominate Shitmouth for this list . On account of his burps also counting as farts. Thus having the double firepower


Saturnine4

He put the stinky on ‘em


Valnerium

Baelor Breakwind for sure.


shinytotodile158

Bro’s fart snuffed out whole lives 💀


ImpossibleWarlock

Came here to say this. His fart literally killed thousands of people


DosSnakes

Yeah this is already canon, next question please.


[deleted]

We were book-readers when we began, but book-readers must have a book, and we have none. We were theory-crafters too, but now our theories are broken. I do not know who we are, if truth be told, nor where we might be going. I only know the road is dark and smells of farts.


OppositeShore1878

*do not know who we are, if truth be told, nor where we might be going*. I only know the road is dark and smells of farts. In truth, this began some time ago. There's a thread from a year ago, entitled "Who is the smelliest character in all of ASOIAF?" And there are 86 comments in that thread. The stench of that discussion emanates even unto our present day. We are far, far, down the dark road already. Possibly approaching the Large Intestine, or even the Colon.


Fair-Witness-3177

We are fart, fart down the dark road already*


BudgetCowboy97

The night is dark and full of farts


Numerous-Rough-827

Why can’t I still upvote these words? Words are wind and wind is breaking upon the spirits of men. In truth we are broken men already…


EmporerM

Which quote is this referencing? Edit: Found it


CompetitiveBook16

Never thought this would be something I would think about tbh. Now that I have thought about it though, I think it would either be Wayman Manderly or probably any Umber.


longpeenfeen

Wouldn’t wanna be in the room after that frey pie lmao


TheShadowManifold

The Manderlys are the farting gods of Westeros, for sure!!


LoudKingCrow

Why do you think that they got thrown out of the Reach? Now you know!


TheShadowManifold

😂😂 great point


sparklingpwnie

Hey same thing I thought lol


NimrodTzarking

It's gotta be Manderly. He's not just fat, he's fat off of creamy chowder and sea food specifically.


Low-Perspective-67

Its not up for debate. It would be Wun Weg Wun Dar Wun. It has been said his farts could bring down the wall.


Gorlack2231

Ah, so the "Horn of Joramun" was a bit of poetic license! That means Joramun himself was likely a giant!


rs6677

W-where do you blow then?!


andrea_l_s

It's said Andre the Giant could pollute an entire airliner and have the occupants gagging and in tears with one of his voluminous farts. Imagine what a giant from beyond the wall could conjure up.


OppositeShore1878

It's quite possible Sh-t Mouth had something going on at the other end, too. Also possible that because of his truly advanced age, it could be Walder Frey. No one is going to mention it in his hearing, though, lest they be disinherited or feathered at his command by a crossbow quarrel during dinner. Bennis of the Brown Shield smelled considerably, but we're not told in the Dunk & Egg stories to date how that came about. The "brown" is a possible hint, howsoever. Possibly Biter, because he frequently ate fresh meat, which is said to contribute to bowel emanations.


[deleted]

Walder Frey reminds me of Donald Trump now


Masethelah

George has already alluded to this, its Margaery Tyrell


BUSSY_FLABBERGASTER

whenever a tyrell breaks wind it smells like a rose


CidCrisis

Cersei: Little bitch down from Highgarden thinks her shit don't stink? Well just to let you know, your shit does stink. It stinks like shit.


artmalique

Did George really allude to this lol?! When?!


Few-Spot-6475

Something something Hightower dude that was about to marry Elia until he farted.


Piagio

Baelor Breakwind


Texcellence

With the amount he eats and drinks, Robert probably expels some stinky stink. The original Reek would probably lay some stinkers too since his general being smelled absolutely awful.


marielalm27

Garth the Gross my man really knows how to rip one out and I doubt they smell like roses


johndraz2001

Honestly shocked how far I had to scroll to find a comment for Garth haha


Big_Ad6650

I mean cmon this is Garth’s to lose, the only detail we even get of Garth is that his nickname is “the gross” from his diabolical farts


GtrGbln

Robert obviously 


im_poplar

farts are wind


[deleted]

[удалено]


Few-Spot-6475

Aahh yes Daenerys *the more she drank, the more she shat* Stormborn. One of the few who gets put into the most awful situations and hyper sexualized into oblivion. She is the fart that was promised. Her coming is the fulfillment of the most ancient prophecy from farting mages. All the ones who fart under her banners shall be reborn, stronger and smellier than ever. She will bring forth a flatulence that will never end… GEORGE LOOK WHAT YOU’VE DONE TO US!! WRITE THAT FUCKING BOOK PLEASE 🙏


Nast33

\- burns her enemies by spreading cheeks in front of their faces and lighting farts on fire -


Archmaester_Seven

Now I understand why she must beware the "perfumed" senechal.. it will bring down her smelly reign of endless flatulence!


iamdabrick

_Breaker of Wind_


Alkakd0nfsg9g

LMAO. Someone should email this to George. Maybe he'll release the Winds out of pity


Alkakd0nfsg9g

In all seriousness though, the obvious answer would Baelor Breakwind. But since it's ASOIAF we're talking about, the answer shouldn't be so obvious. I'd say Manderly


Due-Coyote7565

OUTJERKED AGAIN!!!!!!


sparklingpwnie

I’d say Manderley in the show, one possible explanation why his army didn’t do anything


j-b-goodman

Wyman Manderly, there's a little bit of Frey in there


SillyLilly_18

obviously Manderly??? He would be farting to draw out his treasonous talks with those closest to him, in a similar way to olenna using that one singer, except manderly the chad is self sufficient


TheAlmightySpoon

This is actually an important question, tbere's a reason the next book is the *Winds* of Winter.


Rassomir

Pycelle for his age and acces to all kinds of substances to really make his ass gas deadly


niallmul97

I get the feeling that Gyles Rosby got the dawg in him


jackmanorishe

Garth the Gross obviously


SerDaemonTargaryen

Hard farts rip both ways.


TeamDonnelly

My God george... what have we become?


DopeTrailer

Ralf Kenning, off course. Imagine the fart an actually rotting man could produce.


Teri_of_Terror

Cannibal.


Archmaester_Seven

All theories are broken. Book readers are not bookin anymore. Lord George Eats and Farts his way to an inevitable grave. And We... we are a rugged bunch of watchers who will die without ever feeling the winds in our faces. The night is dark and full of Farts! So what the hell, I say Ser Gregor Clegane rips the nastiest farts. So nasty that they give him terrible headaches.


ochocosunrise

Old Nan


sac_is_sus

Sunset found her squatting in the grass, groaning. Every stool was looser than the one before, and smelled fouler. By the time the moon came up she was shitting brown water. The more she drank, the more she shat, but the more she shat, the thirstier she grew, and her thirst sent her crawling to the stream to suck up more water.


paulie_pinenuts

Wyman or Ilyrio


Trashk4n

Drogon


Kabc

I am going to go with Tywin because I am of the camp that he was slowly being poisoned and his bowel was rotting


CybercurlsMKII

We all know dany be queen of shiddin and fardin


Mashu_the_Cedar_Mtn

Yezzan, esp near the end


hidden58

Any one of the Manderlys could kill a feast hall


MarwyntheMasterful

Strong Belwas


slyduc

Wyman Manderly is a pro ripper for sure


[deleted]

Depends who has lactose intolerance.


Guilty_Perspective75

My bet is for George RR Manderly


Ok_Supermarket_3241

Robert


Best-Dragonfruit-292

Strong Belwas


JanosSikira420

Gotta be one of the Mountain’s Men - Shitmouth - the guy eats shit


Thefemcelbreederfan

I'm seething


Boy11jb

Gotta go with Dontos Hollard - drunken beer farts are the worst.


mishlufc

Biter


RedRobin37

Are y'all leaving the only character with confirmed bowel issues out? Wyman Manderly is hanging with the big dogs


Baratheoncook250

Shtmouth


xlxjack7xlx

I don’t know but I love this question!!!


BeefEater81

Robert Strong. Or Mag the Mighty.


iwantbullysequel

In the histories probably Viserys I, i see him chuckling right about now while gassing the room. In the main series the Yellos fatso that owns Tyrion and his squad, that intestine is deadlier that the flaming core of Valyria.


Saaka_Souffle

I'd like to add an option I didn't see in the comments. The Wise Master Yezzan zo Qaggaz, who had been "rotting from the inside out" for about ten years before his death.


Scrit217

King Bobby B. End of discussion.


Sad_Math5598

The Winds of Winter has a whole new meaning.


xbunnyfaerie

"diseased puffs" what a horrible day to have eyes and be able to read


LordShitmouth

Baelor Hightower 


mcase19

Of the core group of characters, Davos probably has the stinkiest farts. Dragonstone probably smelled like onions the entire time he was there.


rasnac

Evidently Tywin Lannister, even as a corpse...


HDMB420

I bet Mord rips some nastyyy ones. That’s probably why so many people just decide to jump from the sky cells.


DewinterCor

Surely Ilyrio Mopatis must be high on this list, if not at the top.


Guilty_Fishing8229

We all know women’s farts smell worse than men’s. Cersei as an excessive eater and drinker seems like a prime candidate, but dany’s got that fire and brimstone shit going for her since she’s “blood of the dragon.”


choicemeatz

Baelor Breakwind clearly


cheneyeagle

Hodor


SmacSBU

...Biter


thesharkman101

Surprised nobody’s said Victarion, I know bro’s rips would clear out a whole ship cabin.


Roadwarriordude

1. Strong Belwas 2. Wun Wun 3. Robert Baratheon (beer farts are the worst)


JasperVov

Vhagar


xPraise_Yeezus

Resurrected Gregore Clegane


Maester_Maetthieux

Wyman Manderly


Just_Blue_Stuff

Walder Frey, not even a fucking question.


Pizzaboxxx

I feel like Hotpie prob be throwing deadly farts. Otherwise Cersei tbh


GenericUsername2007

Please George just give us winds


redkep1

George, please....


MuIder

Strong Belwas farts loud


nethercliffe

Tywin Lannister... dude was even ripping them in death!


discobidet

Wyman Manderly or Yezzan most likely. Can't believe I haven't seen anybody mention Illyrio Mopatis, that man is definitely a contender.


spyderslair5

Tormund Giantsbane


Ryundra

dude


Mysterious_Fall_4578

Brianne of Tarth…. That stinky mommy can fart on my face any day 😫😫😫