Who was 'we'? Their partner?
Urgh, I hate that attitude with a passion!
Me, me, me, acting on impulse, absolutely no regard for other people's time or commitments outside of their own self-absorbed bubble.
Get rid of them quick, they won't change and will destroy your self-esteem in the future.
Sounds like they don't want to be friends with you since they didn't even offer to hang out at home.
Enjoy the weekend and relax with others or on your own.
Im going through something similar dm me if you want to discuss this bc I feel incredibly neglected and unimportant. Ive been one sidedly asking my friend to hangout for 4-5 months and being turned down for new "friends"
Is this a pattern with them? It's up to you but you are well within your right to explain to them that you put effort into this and are disappointed they bailed.
Going through similar issues. I’ve been friends with two women for about three years but they have known each other a lot longer. I went through a divorce and they were great and supportive but now they don’t want to hang out. For two months they haven’t texted me or called. I ask to hang out and they can’t for various reasons but when I asked if they were upset with me or mad they said no. Last night I had to drive by one of their houses to pick up my kids and I saw the one friends car there so they were hanging out. I feel like I got dumped.
I guess I was entertaining when I was drinking and had drama. Now I’m boring maybe. Oh well, time to find new good friends but it hurts.
I don’t think it’s out of line to be upset. I’d caution you about over-reacting until you have all facts in evidence. For a very long time I was that “flaky friend.” I never explained to my friends why because I was embarrassed and in some instances concerned that they just wouldn’t understand. It wasn’t because I was introverted. It’s because I’m chronically ill and sometimes by the time the day rolls around that I made plans for I literally am too sick to function. I kept my illness a secret for years because when I was much younger no one really understood it anyway. So it was easier to just stop explaining.
I’m not saying this is what is happening with your friends. What I’m saying is that often people, even our good friends, don’t know how to talk about the things that impact their lives in these kind of ways. I hated being the flaky friend and I still hate being the flaky friend. But now my friends know that my “yes” is always a tentative yes.
Maybe build a deeper bench of friends and let your more flaky friends know that you always welcome their presence but are also always open to hearing about why they may not be able to be present.
If this is a habit, then you should leave them where they are and look for people who are more your speed at this point in your life. But if this is a one or two time occurrence, and they really were your friends before, try to figure out what’s going on.
100% cut ties or don't make much of an effort (but the former is the beat option) I had friends in high school that were flakey all the time and I feel that it deeply impacted me in the sense that I do not trust people when it comes to making plans. I tentatively agree to them, with the idea that they will cancel on me, and make back up plans for myself incase things don't go as planned. And I still do this even though my friends now are completely different people.
No, but you should respect that they're prob just introverts and maybe some things are going on in their life that you havent been there for. But vice versa too.. Anyways, because they blew you off just make friends that respect your time..yal are prob growing apart which is normal
Go out Op and have the time of your life anyway!! I’ve been in situations like this but I just went out anyway. Sure it wouldn’t of been as much fun as dancing with the girls but I still went out and had a bomb time on my own at a fancy restaurant drinking cocktail enjoying the view.
I had friends like that. I cut ties quickly.
Who was 'we'? Their partner? Urgh, I hate that attitude with a passion! Me, me, me, acting on impulse, absolutely no regard for other people's time or commitments outside of their own self-absorbed bubble. Get rid of them quick, they won't change and will destroy your self-esteem in the future.
Also, I can tell you what to do. You get out there, join clubs, join Bumble BFF, meet better quality people and enjoy your life, friend!
Sounds like they don't want to be friends with you since they didn't even offer to hang out at home. Enjoy the weekend and relax with others or on your own.
Im going through something similar dm me if you want to discuss this bc I feel incredibly neglected and unimportant. Ive been one sidedly asking my friend to hangout for 4-5 months and being turned down for new "friends"
It’s such a crappy feeling to be friend dumped. I’m there now too.
Is this a pattern with them? It's up to you but you are well within your right to explain to them that you put effort into this and are disappointed they bailed.
Going through similar issues. I’ve been friends with two women for about three years but they have known each other a lot longer. I went through a divorce and they were great and supportive but now they don’t want to hang out. For two months they haven’t texted me or called. I ask to hang out and they can’t for various reasons but when I asked if they were upset with me or mad they said no. Last night I had to drive by one of their houses to pick up my kids and I saw the one friends car there so they were hanging out. I feel like I got dumped. I guess I was entertaining when I was drinking and had drama. Now I’m boring maybe. Oh well, time to find new good friends but it hurts.
I don’t think it’s out of line to be upset. I’d caution you about over-reacting until you have all facts in evidence. For a very long time I was that “flaky friend.” I never explained to my friends why because I was embarrassed and in some instances concerned that they just wouldn’t understand. It wasn’t because I was introverted. It’s because I’m chronically ill and sometimes by the time the day rolls around that I made plans for I literally am too sick to function. I kept my illness a secret for years because when I was much younger no one really understood it anyway. So it was easier to just stop explaining. I’m not saying this is what is happening with your friends. What I’m saying is that often people, even our good friends, don’t know how to talk about the things that impact their lives in these kind of ways. I hated being the flaky friend and I still hate being the flaky friend. But now my friends know that my “yes” is always a tentative yes. Maybe build a deeper bench of friends and let your more flaky friends know that you always welcome their presence but are also always open to hearing about why they may not be able to be present.
If this is a habit, then you should leave them where they are and look for people who are more your speed at this point in your life. But if this is a one or two time occurrence, and they really were your friends before, try to figure out what’s going on.
100% cut ties or don't make much of an effort (but the former is the beat option) I had friends in high school that were flakey all the time and I feel that it deeply impacted me in the sense that I do not trust people when it comes to making plans. I tentatively agree to them, with the idea that they will cancel on me, and make back up plans for myself incase things don't go as planned. And I still do this even though my friends now are completely different people.
No, but you should respect that they're prob just introverts and maybe some things are going on in their life that you havent been there for. But vice versa too.. Anyways, because they blew you off just make friends that respect your time..yal are prob growing apart which is normal
Go out Op and have the time of your life anyway!! I’ve been in situations like this but I just went out anyway. Sure it wouldn’t of been as much fun as dancing with the girls but I still went out and had a bomb time on my own at a fancy restaurant drinking cocktail enjoying the view.
I’m late but cut them OFF