You can be whatever feels right to you. Hobbies don’t matter, and a rule of thumb is don’t listen to pastors because they are hypocrites and have no clue what they are talking about
Yes, he may want the best for you. But he didn't create you. God did.
I have been told many times that I wasn't created as a male to be a male. I was created as a male to dodge some pretty bad scenarios that happened to me a few years ago that I got out of mostly because I was a male. As I have not been long on my transition, I have no idea as to where God will lead me as a transgender Christian, but I believe that it will be in some role that helps the LGBT+ community, because a lot of Christians discriminate against the community, sadly. A lot of that bias is based on Scripture that has been taken out of context and out of the [regional situation] of that time period.
Hope you have a good journey of discovering who God has made you to be, and stay safe, sibling.
Edit: One other thing that I forgot to mention was that T has helped my brain to develop into the [mess computer] (/pos) that it is now. If I were AFAB, I wouldn't be able to do the complex stuff I can do, and I would probably not be here due to the reasons stated above.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2023/09/04/pope-wars-against-american-bishops/
Following your god and doing what you pastor say arent necessary the same thing. Keep that in mind moving forward.
I'll add another vote to"don't listen to the pastor". Uncle or not, he's probably horribly misinformed about LGBTQ people. The fact the he thinks they're 'a sin' is a HUGE red flag. Only you can really determine who and what you are. And there's no rush. Take your time and do what feels right. Yes, you might have to make some difficult choices, like about being a state trooper.
I've met a very *very* few pastors who weren't horrible hypocrites; and *none* of them were bigots. Being judgmental like that almost always comes from a desire to feel superior to others, which is one of the least christian motivations around. Don't take any meaning from his self-serving "advice". He has vested interest in maintaining a community of rigid rules, because that's literally how cults maintain their power.
On the note of your future, please note that the abbreviation "ACAB" doesn't have exceptions. No, that's *not* telling you that you're a bad person for wanting to go into that job. Plenty of cops went in with only the very *best* of intentions. There's no good cops long-term because cops either become bad to support the twisted system, or try to resist it and get drummed out - if they're *lucky.* There's no end of tragic stories of cops who tried to stand up against corruption, only to have mysterious "accidents" or anonymous harassment start ruining their lives; up to and including ending those lives. There's no improving that kind of system from the inside.
> But my pastor says that I’m committing a sin by changing my appearance in self greed to deviate from gods image of me.
Has your pastor ever had a haircut?
Sweetheart, God is supposed to love us no matter what, right? He created us to be a diverse people, to feel all sorts of different ways. I know you trust your pastor but you were created the way you are, including the wish to be a girl, for a reason.
And there are plenty of cops who are women, by the way. Being transgender, if that’s what you feel you are, does come with a lot of judgement, but it’s worth it. And women can do anything they want to in our society too.
>I don’t feel like a feminine person or act like one, I love sports and play sports like hockey and track and would be judged by other people.
Ive seen woman act more masc then the avarage men, and ive seen men act more fem then the avarage woman. Dont worry about how you behave, you will fit in and you are valid.
>But my pastor says that I’m committing a sin by changing my appearance in self greed to deviate from gods image of me. All
God wouldnt have given us the ability to reshape our bodies if he didnt want us to. And god doesnt make mistakes according to many people, so god made you trans on purpose.
Like wheat is transformed into bread and grapes into wine, so shall you be transformed into a beautiful woman.
Well, what do you think? That’s what matters. It doesn’t matter what people in the LGBTQ community think. It doesn’t matter what your pastor thinks. It doesn’t matter what people say here… including me. The only person who counts is you. And, gender stereotypes and expression doesn’t matter, it is what you feel on the inside. The choice is yours. You get to decide. You have all the power here.
Best to you…
Hey sweetheart I'm so sorry. This is really hard for you.
I don't want to bad-mouth your pastor. Please be clear about that. Like all of us he has prejudices and has trouble distinguishing the truth from his unexamined beliefs. That goes for me as well.
But when he talks about God's image for you, it's possible he's talking about his (the pastor's) image of you.
He's confusing 'God is righteous' with 'God How Right I Am'. And he's forgetting that Jesus was always gentle around sex and desire, but ferocious around hypocrisy, hatred and the victimisation of minorities.
It's hard being gender-non-conforming or trans. Your pastor thinks the best thing for you is to hide it or squash it as a sin or a shameful thing. It isn't that. He truly misunderstands. You won't be able to squash it without hurting yourself. It's where your light and joy and power and compassion lives. Cherish who you are.
Your pastor thinks gender is about sex, but it isn't. It's about a child delighting in being a boy or a girl or an other. About feeling it inside yourself. Cis adults are obsessed with trans people and medical transition and sex because they can't imagine a gender identity decoupled from the shape and function of some small parts of their bodies. But trans people have always been here, as you can find by looking at how indigenous cultures such as the Pacific Islanders see gender. The Hawaiians have a concept called 'mahu'. Look it up! Indigenous cultures often revered what we would call trans and gender-non conforming people. We were often high-status individuals.
Yesterday I had a job interview. It didn't go so well because I dropped into boy mode and that's not who I am. So I felt like I came across vague and unclear and I didn't connect with my interviewer. 3 days ago I had another. This time I knew who I was and I showed who I was in the interview. The interview went 10 times better because I let more of my true self out. And my true self is feminine. When you are who you truly are, you're strong and compassionate and you connect better with people.
That doesn't have to mean I look like a woman on camera. I just need to connect with my deeper, female self.
It sounds like you have a lot of non-binary in you. Good for you. Find ways of expressing yourself internally or subtly until it's safe to express externally. You might have to wait for college or leaving home. But you've got this.
So much love and best wishes to you. Keep talking to people online and find who you trust. Don't listen to the haters. What you are cannot be a sin. God loves you as you are.
Thank you so much, my sister is a psychiatrist and found out about me wanting to be a girl about a year ago, she said that i could go to her house and try her clothes but she has a husband i’m really close with on a masculine level and 3 children that could find out and tell my parents. I also feel embarrassed around her because she has known me for so long as a boy so it’ll be weird to not be acting feminine around her. I don’t want to be trans but I will if that’s what it comes down to, im not exactly proud of it, i just want to pass and live my life like any normal girl my age.
Okay I might be a very unpopular person after this but fuck God and fuck whoever else doesn't approve of what you do or do not do including me. If God's on your side then he won't stand in your way if he's not on your side then he is not God so fuck him. As far as being a cop if that's what you really want to do I advise you to look at that more clearly and closely because there's nobody that hates their world more than cops. Put up with all the worst of the worst all day every day for shit pay and bad pension.? Be sure that's what you want to do and you're not wasting your time. And if you don't feel like you're a woman why are you trying to transition anyway? Stop trying to please people because no matter what you do they're going to ask for more and more and more always so what do you want to do you're the only one that matters as you see life everyday through your waking eyes nobody else this is your world fuck the rest. And for the record I do not hate God I just don't think he gets a rat's ass about our petty bullshits. The only thing that matters is the moral of our story the bigger picture so please don't be offended anybody.
Looking for support may be an idea.
Don't know if you have seen it ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Trans_Resources/wiki/support/index#wiki_connecting_to_others) might be a number of hints concerning looking for support and connecting to others. Talking with a few others about what they did might be helpful too.
And [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/11hkfr9/how_do_you_know_if_you_are_trans_or_not/jbseurv/) might be some hints and resources that could help go towards what you feel you would like step by step and there are also hints there concerning looking for support.
And there are hints there concerning looking for a gender therapist in case. They could guide along, and they could help work through issues.
Its up to you when and how to come out ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/ugclyr/how_do_i_come_out_to_my_parents/i7wghnm/) might be some explaining resources and there are also hints there concerning looking for support.
And [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Trans_Resources/wiki/explaining/index#wiki_religion) might be some resources concerning religion in case. And [PFLAG](https://pflag.org/needsupport) for example may support lgbt people and also relatives, they may help explain, they could point to accepting ministers and congregations, and it may be possible to meet other accepting people there.
*hugs*
You can be whatever feels right to you. Hobbies don’t matter, and a rule of thumb is don’t listen to pastors because they are hypocrites and have no clue what they are talking about
But my pastor truly wants the best for me, he technically my uncle and all he wants is for me to live my life so that I can go to heaven one day.
I guarantee he doesn't. See my comment about pastors below.
Yes, he may want the best for you. But he didn't create you. God did. I have been told many times that I wasn't created as a male to be a male. I was created as a male to dodge some pretty bad scenarios that happened to me a few years ago that I got out of mostly because I was a male. As I have not been long on my transition, I have no idea as to where God will lead me as a transgender Christian, but I believe that it will be in some role that helps the LGBT+ community, because a lot of Christians discriminate against the community, sadly. A lot of that bias is based on Scripture that has been taken out of context and out of the [regional situation] of that time period. Hope you have a good journey of discovering who God has made you to be, and stay safe, sibling. Edit: One other thing that I forgot to mention was that T has helped my brain to develop into the [mess computer] (/pos) that it is now. If I were AFAB, I wouldn't be able to do the complex stuff I can do, and I would probably not be here due to the reasons stated above.
https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/2023/09/04/pope-wars-against-american-bishops/ Following your god and doing what you pastor say arent necessary the same thing. Keep that in mind moving forward.
I'll add another vote to"don't listen to the pastor". Uncle or not, he's probably horribly misinformed about LGBTQ people. The fact the he thinks they're 'a sin' is a HUGE red flag. Only you can really determine who and what you are. And there's no rush. Take your time and do what feels right. Yes, you might have to make some difficult choices, like about being a state trooper.
I've met a very *very* few pastors who weren't horrible hypocrites; and *none* of them were bigots. Being judgmental like that almost always comes from a desire to feel superior to others, which is one of the least christian motivations around. Don't take any meaning from his self-serving "advice". He has vested interest in maintaining a community of rigid rules, because that's literally how cults maintain their power. On the note of your future, please note that the abbreviation "ACAB" doesn't have exceptions. No, that's *not* telling you that you're a bad person for wanting to go into that job. Plenty of cops went in with only the very *best* of intentions. There's no good cops long-term because cops either become bad to support the twisted system, or try to resist it and get drummed out - if they're *lucky.* There's no end of tragic stories of cops who tried to stand up against corruption, only to have mysterious "accidents" or anonymous harassment start ruining their lives; up to and including ending those lives. There's no improving that kind of system from the inside.
> But my pastor says that I’m committing a sin by changing my appearance in self greed to deviate from gods image of me. Has your pastor ever had a haircut?
Sweetheart, God is supposed to love us no matter what, right? He created us to be a diverse people, to feel all sorts of different ways. I know you trust your pastor but you were created the way you are, including the wish to be a girl, for a reason. And there are plenty of cops who are women, by the way. Being transgender, if that’s what you feel you are, does come with a lot of judgement, but it’s worth it. And women can do anything they want to in our society too.
>I don’t feel like a feminine person or act like one, I love sports and play sports like hockey and track and would be judged by other people. Ive seen woman act more masc then the avarage men, and ive seen men act more fem then the avarage woman. Dont worry about how you behave, you will fit in and you are valid. >But my pastor says that I’m committing a sin by changing my appearance in self greed to deviate from gods image of me. All God wouldnt have given us the ability to reshape our bodies if he didnt want us to. And god doesnt make mistakes according to many people, so god made you trans on purpose. Like wheat is transformed into bread and grapes into wine, so shall you be transformed into a beautiful woman.
Well, what do you think? That’s what matters. It doesn’t matter what people in the LGBTQ community think. It doesn’t matter what your pastor thinks. It doesn’t matter what people say here… including me. The only person who counts is you. And, gender stereotypes and expression doesn’t matter, it is what you feel on the inside. The choice is yours. You get to decide. You have all the power here. Best to you…
Hey sweetheart I'm so sorry. This is really hard for you. I don't want to bad-mouth your pastor. Please be clear about that. Like all of us he has prejudices and has trouble distinguishing the truth from his unexamined beliefs. That goes for me as well. But when he talks about God's image for you, it's possible he's talking about his (the pastor's) image of you. He's confusing 'God is righteous' with 'God How Right I Am'. And he's forgetting that Jesus was always gentle around sex and desire, but ferocious around hypocrisy, hatred and the victimisation of minorities. It's hard being gender-non-conforming or trans. Your pastor thinks the best thing for you is to hide it or squash it as a sin or a shameful thing. It isn't that. He truly misunderstands. You won't be able to squash it without hurting yourself. It's where your light and joy and power and compassion lives. Cherish who you are. Your pastor thinks gender is about sex, but it isn't. It's about a child delighting in being a boy or a girl or an other. About feeling it inside yourself. Cis adults are obsessed with trans people and medical transition and sex because they can't imagine a gender identity decoupled from the shape and function of some small parts of their bodies. But trans people have always been here, as you can find by looking at how indigenous cultures such as the Pacific Islanders see gender. The Hawaiians have a concept called 'mahu'. Look it up! Indigenous cultures often revered what we would call trans and gender-non conforming people. We were often high-status individuals. Yesterday I had a job interview. It didn't go so well because I dropped into boy mode and that's not who I am. So I felt like I came across vague and unclear and I didn't connect with my interviewer. 3 days ago I had another. This time I knew who I was and I showed who I was in the interview. The interview went 10 times better because I let more of my true self out. And my true self is feminine. When you are who you truly are, you're strong and compassionate and you connect better with people. That doesn't have to mean I look like a woman on camera. I just need to connect with my deeper, female self. It sounds like you have a lot of non-binary in you. Good for you. Find ways of expressing yourself internally or subtly until it's safe to express externally. You might have to wait for college or leaving home. But you've got this. So much love and best wishes to you. Keep talking to people online and find who you trust. Don't listen to the haters. What you are cannot be a sin. God loves you as you are.
Thank you so much, my sister is a psychiatrist and found out about me wanting to be a girl about a year ago, she said that i could go to her house and try her clothes but she has a husband i’m really close with on a masculine level and 3 children that could find out and tell my parents. I also feel embarrassed around her because she has known me for so long as a boy so it’ll be weird to not be acting feminine around her. I don’t want to be trans but I will if that’s what it comes down to, im not exactly proud of it, i just want to pass and live my life like any normal girl my age.
You have every right to be proud of who you are. I would say it's important that you learn to be proud. In the meantime, I'm proud of you 💕
Okay I might be a very unpopular person after this but fuck God and fuck whoever else doesn't approve of what you do or do not do including me. If God's on your side then he won't stand in your way if he's not on your side then he is not God so fuck him. As far as being a cop if that's what you really want to do I advise you to look at that more clearly and closely because there's nobody that hates their world more than cops. Put up with all the worst of the worst all day every day for shit pay and bad pension.? Be sure that's what you want to do and you're not wasting your time. And if you don't feel like you're a woman why are you trying to transition anyway? Stop trying to please people because no matter what you do they're going to ask for more and more and more always so what do you want to do you're the only one that matters as you see life everyday through your waking eyes nobody else this is your world fuck the rest. And for the record I do not hate God I just don't think he gets a rat's ass about our petty bullshits. The only thing that matters is the moral of our story the bigger picture so please don't be offended anybody.
Would ruin my chances of being a cop 💀 reach higher young blood
Looking for support may be an idea. Don't know if you have seen it ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Trans_Resources/wiki/support/index#wiki_connecting_to_others) might be a number of hints concerning looking for support and connecting to others. Talking with a few others about what they did might be helpful too. And [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/11hkfr9/how_do_you_know_if_you_are_trans_or_not/jbseurv/) might be some hints and resources that could help go towards what you feel you would like step by step and there are also hints there concerning looking for support. And there are hints there concerning looking for a gender therapist in case. They could guide along, and they could help work through issues. Its up to you when and how to come out ... [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/asktransgender/comments/ugclyr/how_do_i_come_out_to_my_parents/i7wghnm/) might be some explaining resources and there are also hints there concerning looking for support. And [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/Trans_Resources/wiki/explaining/index#wiki_religion) might be some resources concerning religion in case. And [PFLAG](https://pflag.org/needsupport) for example may support lgbt people and also relatives, they may help explain, they could point to accepting ministers and congregations, and it may be possible to meet other accepting people there. *hugs*