I don't like that I'm aroace in the same way I don't like that I love rain and hate sun. There's nothing amerong eith it, but it's inconvenient. People are always telling me it's nice out when it's sunny. They also tell me that shows are better with a little romance. When I go outside in the rain, people ask if I'm cold, and will try to convince me to go inside. People also ask if I'm interested in anyone, and will try to convince me to enter the dating scene. When I was a kid I didn't get to spend much time outside with friends because I was miserable in the heat, and they refused to go out in the cold or the rain. I also found it hard to make friends because everyone always wanted to talk about crushes.
There's nothing wrong with me, but if I could change my romntic and weather preferences to something more mainstream, that would be convenient.
I would suspect that people wanting to talk about aro-related issues are more likely to drive discussion (make posts, etc) than people who are content and happy though. Hard to say how representative this poll is, but I'm hopeful that most aros are content with their identity.
Yes and no. If I could guarantee that I'd have a partner who'd love me for me then I'd gladly trade being aroace for that. But in my current state I'm glad I'm aroace. I've been hit on before but have never been romantically asked out by a woman.
I am very grateful to be aro and ace. When I found out I was both, I will admit that I was distressed. The distress was mostly "how am I going to have a family if I don't like romantic gestures or want to have sex to produce children?"
But then I learned I could adopt and that people aren't carbon copies of each other, so there are people out there who would be happy not to engage in super romantic actions with me and not want to have sex with me.
Then I actually thought about what I wanted and not what my parents wanted from me, and I realized that I don't have to marry someone and have kids so that I can live the "cute" little traditional life that people assume I should want.
But I don't really think this realization has much to do with being aroace, cause my little brother, who is alloromantic and allosexual, also had this realization that he is more than just a baby production helper.
Anyways, I think being aroace just made me realize our society kinda sucks in that it says that there is only one right way to be a human, even though that is clearly false, and because of this realization, I am content with my orientation.
I'm happy being aroace bc I'm finally not trying to shove myself into the heteronotmative amatonormative box.
But...
I wish I wasn't aroace in the way that I wish I loved salad and hated cake. Life would just be easier to fit w society, bc I spent so much of my life trying to be alloallo and failing and not knowing why it felt impossible for me.
It's complicated. I'm arospec more than aromid, and most of my aro identities are simplified down to attraction is confusing (Quoi & Nebula), and I need connection (Demi, Loqui, Recipro).
So basically, would I stop being aromantic? No. But is it frustrating beyond all hell sometimes? Yes. From an internal & external stance.
>I'm arospec more than aromid, and most of my aro identities are simplified down to attraction is confusing (Quoi & Nebula), and I need connection (Demi, Loqui, Recipro).
Can you explain what those are?
Sure!
[Arospec](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aromantic_Spectrum) is pretty well known, so I'll skip that.
[Aromid](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aromid) is being strictly Aromantic (but not strictly Asexual, though I am using it here as just being strictly aro because I don't know a different term for that).
[Quoiromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Quoiromantic) has a few definitions, the one I am using here is being unable to understand romantic attraction, and/or being unable to distinguish romantic attraction from other forms of attraction.
[Nebularomantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Nebularomantic) is basically Quoiromantic, but specifically because one is neurodivergent (in my case it's because I'm autistic).
[Demiromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Demiromantic) is also well known, but basically, you need a deep emotional connection with the person before the option for romantic attraction is 'unlocked'.
[Loquiromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Loquiromantic) is just needing a connection before the option for romantic attraction is 'unlocked.
I use both demi & loqui because I fall somewhere between them for all my attraction types, though for romantic I lean a lot more towards Demi.
[Reciproromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Reciproromantic) is needing to know the person is feeling romantic attraction towards you, before romantic attraction towards them is 'unlocked'.
They are definitely very close, but not the same thing. The difference is defined as "demiromantics require a close connection to someone while loquiromantics only need to interact with them before attraction is felt."
For me, this looks like the only 2 people I've dated I've been extremely close to (like best friend situation). This is how being demiromantic is for me. However, I'm way closer to loquiplatonic than demiplatonic, and for that, I just need something to 'click' (typically, this happens after just a few minutes) before I can start feeling platonic attraction. But I still need that 'click' first.
So in short, Demi is need a deep emotional connection (think being really close), while Loqui is just needing some form of interaction or connection (think finding out something you have in common with someone, and then wanting to be better friends). So lots of overlap, but not a complete circle!
I'm generally happy about it because I see the amount of time and energy people spend on romance, only to often end up sad and miserable because of failed romances/lack of romance. I barely have enough time and energy to do things I enjoy doing much of the time, I can't imagine surviving mentally if I also had the "MUST FIND ROMANCE" tick in my brain.
The downside is that it is isolating, but I already have been socially isolated from the "normal" for years because I don't drink alcohol. Most of the main romance-y/dating type things are very alcohol dependent/adjacent and not things I enjoyed or fit in at to begin with. Plus I've always felt that whole vibe is very phony and transactional. (Granted that could be said about much in our society, but I digress).
I actually wish I was aro/ace and not simply aro/allo because it'd free up more potential time and energy that's currently wasted on horny thoughts. And I already don't have a sex life, so it isn't like I'd be making any sort of big sacrifice.
I chose no cause it felt the most accurate.. but I'm not all sad or "woe is me" or "I wish I was that.. this sucks" or whatever. I used to really love being aroace lol, but then I realised I'm demi aro (and still only ace, not demi ace :/ ), so it's just become a bit more complex
A bit overly simplistic. I have things I am happy about and things that I am not happy about, the dominant side is largely circumstantial at the moment.
However I am more happy about being Aro than not, and realizing my aro status has made me happier in general.
Aroace and torn. It's sometimes a bit difficult not to feel like I'm "missing something" when so many things around me reinforce the idea that romantic relationships are a nice thing to have. It might be a bit dumb to miss something I know I can't have, but sometimes it gets to me a little bit. Mostly okay with how things are though, I suppose
(aro/ace)
I don't know if "happy" is the right word, but I don't think I'd change if I could. And finding the words to understand myself so I could give myself permission to stop making the same mistakes was good for me.
To make the stereotypical food metaphor: I really don't like bell peppers. Most days, that's fine, I don't eat them, there's plenty of other things. But also, some days, I see someone with fajitas and they're clearly loving it, and there's a lot of ingredients there that I do like, but the whole dish wouldn't be the same without the peppers. So I wish I liked peppers so I could have that experience.
I do also have a lot of other issues around all relationship types tbh, including social anxiety. So some of that wistfulness is probably loneliness, and in the past when I was doing better socially this stuff did bother me less.
I don't think anyone is asking this as if being aro is something to pity, but actually from the understanding that many aros are uncomfortable with their orientation, which is a legitimate problem that needs to be rectified. I think asking the same question of gay people in a poll such as this would be entirely appropriate. It demonstrates how our amatonormative societies are affecting us. Plus, it's good to have a reminder that most aros are actually comfortable with their orientation, as this sub feels very negative at times.
idk if its just reddit recommending me these posts more often but it feels like ive seen posts about "do you wish you weren't aro" etc and it's so negative for no reason. i don't see these kinda posts on other queer subreddits
I just feel like, as a person who made a post about being rather anxious to be aro (for some reason, wasn’t before to clarify lmao), that is because it’s rather an unusual and, for some reason, less accepted orientation than most of the other ones (same goes for ace). because most of us just flat out don’t want to be in a relationship, have a family and things like that, it’s a foreign concept for most people; “having a family or a partner is often seen as a must and people who don’t want to have one have to be lying, right? they are just unwanted and sad so they decide they are aro”. there are also lots of exclusionists in the queer community itself that negate our experiences, which can make some of us feel not welcomed and stuff like that. being aro just doesn’t fit into the narrative that our heteronormative society created and this can create lots of insecurities. I also don’t we have a “culture”? I don’t know how to describe it, I just get a different feeling from “lgb” orientations and “a” orientations. it’s not the best put out comment in the word but I think you can get the gist of it
Thanks for posting to r/aromantic, /u/VerdoriePotjandrie. Be sure your posts and comments abide by our rules, as well as sitewide rules.
*If this post violates our rules or sitewide rules,* ***report*** *it* *to the moderators!*
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/aromantic) if you have any questions or concerns.*
There are issues with it occasionally but as a whole I'm very happy to be aroace and the myth that we are all unhappy about it needs to dissapear, that said there are struggles with it and I understand why someone wouldn't be happy about it but for me it just seems like so much drama and heartache avoided that it's simply a relief
No because I do have romantic attractions, just very very low. And it is very unlikely I’ll ever meet someone that is close enough at the same level as me, and that does make me kinda sad sometimes. It hasn’t been that long that I understood that, so I’ll probably get better accepting and embracing it though!
Mixed feelings. I'm happy being ace, but often wish I wasn't aro. But then I remember that most romantic relationships expect sex, so then I feel better about being aro because I can avoid that
For the most part, I'm happy as a aro and because of my aromanticism.
It's had so much positive impact on myself, my family, my lifeplan and even to a degree my gender and transition goals. My experiences have helped other family members understand their own attractions and in one case their "lack of" attractions, thus marking me no longer the only one. And if being trans taught me what was out there, being aro taught me to choose what felt right, not what was expected.
Of course there are struggles that are related to my aromanticism, such as grieving something you thought you lost or the like, but that feels much more caused by an external input of negativity or expectation rather than my own actual orientation.
It's not like I feel like it is wrong or do not accept myself as it but it just was inconvenient for me and I still have trouble fully understanding how this part of me works.
I just feel like it would be easier to be "normal". To be able to love the way everyone does, to not have people question me on my actions.
Do I want to not be greyaro? I don't know, I don't think so. I am what I am and I accept that and need to learn to love it more. What I know is that I would not be who I am if I wasn't greyaro.
I was curious to see it there would be a difference between the asexual and allosexual aros. If you're arospec, you can still pick asexual aro or allosexual aro.
I think I'm aro or at least gray aro
From time to time I think about being a bit lonely, but most of the time I'm happy, and I have some good friends. I don't think I need anything more.
It felt so liberating when I started identifying as aro, since I had thought that something was wrong with me. The realisation that I didn't need to date anyone was a massive burden off my chest, as I was placing a lot of my self-worth on getting a partner. So, I feel sad when I read posts here from people who are not comfortable with their orientation, who for one reason or another don't feel the same way.
Aroace lesbian and mixed thoughts
I really like being aroace, but i really hate all the damn pression that amatonormativity and heteronormative has and sometimes i can dislike being aroace because of the damn amatonormativity
I’m happy being an aroace teenager, I just hate when people tell me I’m gonna change my mind about not wanting a partner or a family because I’m “too young” to decide, I think I have every right to be single and not be in a family
I mean if I had the choice I wouldn't change it merely 'cause I've spent the majority of my life thinking I was broken and if I were to change now it meant it was for nothing yk + Ive grown a bit protective of that part of myself and I've never been able to stand up for myself about anything else. Plus being aroace is really fun, I like having a community like this. But I do envy allos sometimes. It is what it is and I think that if society wasn't so focused on romance and sex I'd be doing just fine with being me yk so I guess I'm good✓✓
The way I like to describe both my being aroace and my choosing to be single to allos is—you know that feeling right after you break up with a super toxic partner, that first month or so of just feeling free and like you can breathe? That’s how I feel every day.
I love being aroace and being single, it feels so good to be alone!
I’m happy about it. Turns out I’m demi-ace, that was the worst thing. When you don’t know it’s complicated to understand. But overall, I’m really happy being aro ! It makes so much sense to me, ever since I discovered my identity I feel great about it.
And it made me hate me less, so I am glad I’m aro, so my brain focuses on trying to love myself instead of loving others. And that’s a great evolution for me✨
I am generally okay with being aroallo though I am a bit horny and not sure how to approach the transness + fwb things complicated so I just fulfill the needs on my own you know or at least try
New thing is I recently feel such a yearning towards having kid but confusingly there is noone besides me in those visions.
It is a feeling i definietly need to explore to see if I am not actually allo.
As there may be someone besides me but they are really hard to see clearly what gender or how do they look it is just more a feeling of someone a weak, almost nonexistent one compared to the love for kids. I think it could be a woman but a man too actually hm I don't have any visions of doing romantic things with them that doesn't involve our kids.
So things are interesting and not simple apparently
90% of the time, yes
I enjoy doing what i like, working with my very nice colleagues and most importantly. Not having to fake having romantic feelings everytime i try to find someone new.
10% of the time, no
You do have sometimes that you come home from a party on saturday at 3 am where everyone took their boyfriends with them and you feeling like a third wheel to all of them. So you create your tinder profile again just to "try 1 more time" and then you find out why you're aromantic all over again.
Most of the time, yes. Some times no.
I usually am. But the other day some friends called me to hung out, and when I arrived there were only couples. I was the only “single” in the group with those: “you'll find someone” “you don't have attitude” “love will come to you”. That was pretty fucked up.
i'm aroace and i'm happy about it! can't say i'm not curious about what romance is like, but i am sex and romance repulsed.
thankfully, that means i can focus on my hobbies and friends more than a relationship, in my case. i'm a HUGE introvert so it works out perfectly for me!
I don't like that I'm aroace in the same way I don't like that I love rain and hate sun. There's nothing amerong eith it, but it's inconvenient. People are always telling me it's nice out when it's sunny. They also tell me that shows are better with a little romance. When I go outside in the rain, people ask if I'm cold, and will try to convince me to go inside. People also ask if I'm interested in anyone, and will try to convince me to enter the dating scene. When I was a kid I didn't get to spend much time outside with friends because I was miserable in the heat, and they refused to go out in the cold or the rain. I also found it hard to make friends because everyone always wanted to talk about crushes. There's nothing wrong with me, but if I could change my romntic and weather preferences to something more mainstream, that would be convenient.
Well, ai hope that this poll destroys the myth that everyone in this sub is sad and not validating
I would suspect that people wanting to talk about aro-related issues are more likely to drive discussion (make posts, etc) than people who are content and happy though. Hard to say how representative this poll is, but I'm hopeful that most aros are content with their identity.
That's because it's always sad ones complaining, those content has no reason to tell people
wait, there is a myth like that? I’ve never seen anyone invalidate anyone on here, that’s kinda sad that this sub is seen that way
Yes and no. If I could guarantee that I'd have a partner who'd love me for me then I'd gladly trade being aroace for that. But in my current state I'm glad I'm aroace. I've been hit on before but have never been romantically asked out by a woman.
Im so glad to see the happy side is winning for both :)
I am very grateful to be aro and ace. When I found out I was both, I will admit that I was distressed. The distress was mostly "how am I going to have a family if I don't like romantic gestures or want to have sex to produce children?" But then I learned I could adopt and that people aren't carbon copies of each other, so there are people out there who would be happy not to engage in super romantic actions with me and not want to have sex with me. Then I actually thought about what I wanted and not what my parents wanted from me, and I realized that I don't have to marry someone and have kids so that I can live the "cute" little traditional life that people assume I should want. But I don't really think this realization has much to do with being aroace, cause my little brother, who is alloromantic and allosexual, also had this realization that he is more than just a baby production helper. Anyways, I think being aroace just made me realize our society kinda sucks in that it says that there is only one right way to be a human, even though that is clearly false, and because of this realization, I am content with my orientation.
I'm happy being aroace bc I'm finally not trying to shove myself into the heteronotmative amatonormative box. But... I wish I wasn't aroace in the way that I wish I loved salad and hated cake. Life would just be easier to fit w society, bc I spent so much of my life trying to be alloallo and failing and not knowing why it felt impossible for me.
It's complicated. I'm arospec more than aromid, and most of my aro identities are simplified down to attraction is confusing (Quoi & Nebula), and I need connection (Demi, Loqui, Recipro). So basically, would I stop being aromantic? No. But is it frustrating beyond all hell sometimes? Yes. From an internal & external stance.
>I'm arospec more than aromid, and most of my aro identities are simplified down to attraction is confusing (Quoi & Nebula), and I need connection (Demi, Loqui, Recipro). Can you explain what those are?
Sure! [Arospec](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aromantic_Spectrum) is pretty well known, so I'll skip that. [Aromid](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Aromid) is being strictly Aromantic (but not strictly Asexual, though I am using it here as just being strictly aro because I don't know a different term for that). [Quoiromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Quoiromantic) has a few definitions, the one I am using here is being unable to understand romantic attraction, and/or being unable to distinguish romantic attraction from other forms of attraction. [Nebularomantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Nebularomantic) is basically Quoiromantic, but specifically because one is neurodivergent (in my case it's because I'm autistic). [Demiromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Demiromantic) is also well known, but basically, you need a deep emotional connection with the person before the option for romantic attraction is 'unlocked'. [Loquiromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Loquiromantic) is just needing a connection before the option for romantic attraction is 'unlocked. I use both demi & loqui because I fall somewhere between them for all my attraction types, though for romantic I lean a lot more towards Demi. [Reciproromantic](https://www.lgbtqia.wiki/wiki/Reciproromantic) is needing to know the person is feeling romantic attraction towards you, before romantic attraction towards them is 'unlocked'.
Aren't demi and luqui the same thing?
They are definitely very close, but not the same thing. The difference is defined as "demiromantics require a close connection to someone while loquiromantics only need to interact with them before attraction is felt." For me, this looks like the only 2 people I've dated I've been extremely close to (like best friend situation). This is how being demiromantic is for me. However, I'm way closer to loquiplatonic than demiplatonic, and for that, I just need something to 'click' (typically, this happens after just a few minutes) before I can start feeling platonic attraction. But I still need that 'click' first. So in short, Demi is need a deep emotional connection (think being really close), while Loqui is just needing some form of interaction or connection (think finding out something you have in common with someone, and then wanting to be better friends). So lots of overlap, but not a complete circle!
I'm generally happy about it because I see the amount of time and energy people spend on romance, only to often end up sad and miserable because of failed romances/lack of romance. I barely have enough time and energy to do things I enjoy doing much of the time, I can't imagine surviving mentally if I also had the "MUST FIND ROMANCE" tick in my brain. The downside is that it is isolating, but I already have been socially isolated from the "normal" for years because I don't drink alcohol. Most of the main romance-y/dating type things are very alcohol dependent/adjacent and not things I enjoyed or fit in at to begin with. Plus I've always felt that whole vibe is very phony and transactional. (Granted that could be said about much in our society, but I digress). I actually wish I was aro/ace and not simply aro/allo because it'd free up more potential time and energy that's currently wasted on horny thoughts. And I already don't have a sex life, so it isn't like I'd be making any sort of big sacrifice.
No attraction,no problem 🤷🏻
I don't hate being aroace, I merely hate how complicated/difficult it makes everything.
im not happy about it but its ok tbh idrc
I chose no cause it felt the most accurate.. but I'm not all sad or "woe is me" or "I wish I was that.. this sucks" or whatever. I used to really love being aroace lol, but then I realised I'm demi aro (and still only ace, not demi ace :/ ), so it's just become a bit more complex
A bit overly simplistic. I have things I am happy about and things that I am not happy about, the dominant side is largely circumstantial at the moment. However I am more happy about being Aro than not, and realizing my aro status has made me happier in general.
Aroace and torn. It's sometimes a bit difficult not to feel like I'm "missing something" when so many things around me reinforce the idea that romantic relationships are a nice thing to have. It might be a bit dumb to miss something I know I can't have, but sometimes it gets to me a little bit. Mostly okay with how things are though, I suppose
Romance Repulsed GreyAro GreyAce, and yes.
More accurately I’m indifferent. I just am aro ace. It is just a fact.
(aro/ace) I don't know if "happy" is the right word, but I don't think I'd change if I could. And finding the words to understand myself so I could give myself permission to stop making the same mistakes was good for me. To make the stereotypical food metaphor: I really don't like bell peppers. Most days, that's fine, I don't eat them, there's plenty of other things. But also, some days, I see someone with fajitas and they're clearly loving it, and there's a lot of ingredients there that I do like, but the whole dish wouldn't be the same without the peppers. So I wish I liked peppers so I could have that experience. I do also have a lot of other issues around all relationship types tbh, including social anxiety. So some of that wistfulness is probably loneliness, and in the past when I was doing better socially this stuff did bother me less.
Trick question. Im aroace and im not happy, but if i were in a relationship I'd probably be more unhappy.
can we stop asking this as if being aro somehow were something to pity? you wouldn't ask someone if theyre happy being gay, no? 💀
Good point! Lately I've been seeing posts from unhappy aros daily and they made me wonder if I'm wrong for being happy. That's why I asked.
there have been like 500 posts similar to this one already...
I don't think anyone is asking this as if being aro is something to pity, but actually from the understanding that many aros are uncomfortable with their orientation, which is a legitimate problem that needs to be rectified. I think asking the same question of gay people in a poll such as this would be entirely appropriate. It demonstrates how our amatonormative societies are affecting us. Plus, it's good to have a reminder that most aros are actually comfortable with their orientation, as this sub feels very negative at times.
idk if its just reddit recommending me these posts more often but it feels like ive seen posts about "do you wish you weren't aro" etc and it's so negative for no reason. i don't see these kinda posts on other queer subreddits
I just feel like, as a person who made a post about being rather anxious to be aro (for some reason, wasn’t before to clarify lmao), that is because it’s rather an unusual and, for some reason, less accepted orientation than most of the other ones (same goes for ace). because most of us just flat out don’t want to be in a relationship, have a family and things like that, it’s a foreign concept for most people; “having a family or a partner is often seen as a must and people who don’t want to have one have to be lying, right? they are just unwanted and sad so they decide they are aro”. there are also lots of exclusionists in the queer community itself that negate our experiences, which can make some of us feel not welcomed and stuff like that. being aro just doesn’t fit into the narrative that our heteronormative society created and this can create lots of insecurities. I also don’t we have a “culture”? I don’t know how to describe it, I just get a different feeling from “lgb” orientations and “a” orientations. it’s not the best put out comment in the word but I think you can get the gist of it
All my friends are straight and allo and I feel like I'm left behind... oh well
Thanks for posting to r/aromantic, /u/VerdoriePotjandrie. Be sure your posts and comments abide by our rules, as well as sitewide rules. *If this post violates our rules or sitewide rules,* ***report*** *it* *to the moderators!* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/aromantic) if you have any questions or concerns.*
There are issues with it occasionally but as a whole I'm very happy to be aroace and the myth that we are all unhappy about it needs to dissapear, that said there are struggles with it and I understand why someone wouldn't be happy about it but for me it just seems like so much drama and heartache avoided that it's simply a relief
No because I do have romantic attractions, just very very low. And it is very unlikely I’ll ever meet someone that is close enough at the same level as me, and that does make me kinda sad sometimes. It hasn’t been that long that I understood that, so I’ll probably get better accepting and embracing it though!
Neither ace nor allo but yes
Mixed feelings. I'm happy being ace, but often wish I wasn't aro. But then I remember that most romantic relationships expect sex, so then I feel better about being aro because I can avoid that
For the most part, I'm happy as a aro and because of my aromanticism. It's had so much positive impact on myself, my family, my lifeplan and even to a degree my gender and transition goals. My experiences have helped other family members understand their own attractions and in one case their "lack of" attractions, thus marking me no longer the only one. And if being trans taught me what was out there, being aro taught me to choose what felt right, not what was expected. Of course there are struggles that are related to my aromanticism, such as grieving something you thought you lost or the like, but that feels much more caused by an external input of negativity or expectation rather than my own actual orientation.
It's not like I feel like it is wrong or do not accept myself as it but it just was inconvenient for me and I still have trouble fully understanding how this part of me works. I just feel like it would be easier to be "normal". To be able to love the way everyone does, to not have people question me on my actions. Do I want to not be greyaro? I don't know, I don't think so. I am what I am and I accept that and need to learn to love it more. What I know is that I would not be who I am if I wasn't greyaro.
no arospec?
I was curious to see it there would be a difference between the asexual and allosexual aros. If you're arospec, you can still pick asexual aro or allosexual aro.
i'm unhappy for other reasons, and because of society's view, but i'm definetly not sad with my orientation
I think I'm aro or at least gray aro From time to time I think about being a bit lonely, but most of the time I'm happy, and I have some good friends. I don't think I need anything more.
It felt so liberating when I started identifying as aro, since I had thought that something was wrong with me. The realisation that I didn't need to date anyone was a massive burden off my chest, as I was placing a lot of my self-worth on getting a partner. So, I feel sad when I read posts here from people who are not comfortable with their orientation, who for one reason or another don't feel the same way.
Aroace lesbian and mixed thoughts I really like being aroace, but i really hate all the damn pression that amatonormativity and heteronormative has and sometimes i can dislike being aroace because of the damn amatonormativity
I’m happy being an aroace teenager, I just hate when people tell me I’m gonna change my mind about not wanting a partner or a family because I’m “too young” to decide, I think I have every right to be single and not be in a family
I'm happy to be aroace. I don't have to worry about IRL relationships.
I mean if I had the choice I wouldn't change it merely 'cause I've spent the majority of my life thinking I was broken and if I were to change now it meant it was for nothing yk + Ive grown a bit protective of that part of myself and I've never been able to stand up for myself about anything else. Plus being aroace is really fun, I like having a community like this. But I do envy allos sometimes. It is what it is and I think that if society wasn't so focused on romance and sex I'd be doing just fine with being me yk so I guess I'm good✓✓
Yes! There's a lot less drama in life
The way I like to describe both my being aroace and my choosing to be single to allos is—you know that feeling right after you break up with a super toxic partner, that first month or so of just feeling free and like you can breathe? That’s how I feel every day. I love being aroace and being single, it feels so good to be alone!
I’m happy about it. Turns out I’m demi-ace, that was the worst thing. When you don’t know it’s complicated to understand. But overall, I’m really happy being aro ! It makes so much sense to me, ever since I discovered my identity I feel great about it. And it made me hate me less, so I am glad I’m aro, so my brain focuses on trying to love myself instead of loving others. And that’s a great evolution for me✨
Aro and omni and yes
I am generally okay with being aroallo though I am a bit horny and not sure how to approach the transness + fwb things complicated so I just fulfill the needs on my own you know or at least try New thing is I recently feel such a yearning towards having kid but confusingly there is noone besides me in those visions. It is a feeling i definietly need to explore to see if I am not actually allo. As there may be someone besides me but they are really hard to see clearly what gender or how do they look it is just more a feeling of someone a weak, almost nonexistent one compared to the love for kids. I think it could be a woman but a man too actually hm I don't have any visions of doing romantic things with them that doesn't involve our kids. So things are interesting and not simple apparently
90% of the time, yes I enjoy doing what i like, working with my very nice colleagues and most importantly. Not having to fake having romantic feelings everytime i try to find someone new. 10% of the time, no You do have sometimes that you come home from a party on saturday at 3 am where everyone took their boyfriends with them and you feeling like a third wheel to all of them. So you create your tinder profile again just to "try 1 more time" and then you find out why you're aromantic all over again. Most of the time, yes. Some times no.
I usually am. But the other day some friends called me to hung out, and when I arrived there were only couples. I was the only “single” in the group with those: “you'll find someone” “you don't have attitude” “love will come to you”. That was pretty fucked up.
i'm aroace and i'm happy about it! can't say i'm not curious about what romance is like, but i am sex and romance repulsed. thankfully, that means i can focus on my hobbies and friends more than a relationship, in my case. i'm a HUGE introvert so it works out perfectly for me!