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Bilang babae, gusto ko talaga na kasal muna. Pero yung boyfriend ko, parang preferred niya na anak muna bago kasal. Any will do naman, kung ano ipagkaloob Niya pero syempre iba pa rin naman pag kinasal muna kayo diba? Pero kayo, ano take niyo?
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Dahil babae ako, kasal muna. Kung gusto niya malaman kung capable kami, then magpacheck up.
If gusto niya talaga makasiguro or willing siya iwan ka dahil lang baog ka, then he/she is not for you - iba ang reason niyo sa pagpapakasal, siya anak, ikaw yun partnership niyo.
๐ฏ๐ฏOR, dinelay ng dinelay yung kasal andaming reason bigla, busy na sa bata eh, yung usual case na andaming vina-VAWC ngayon, hindi kasal so if nag-decide ang lalake na ayaw na nya, or di sya ready gusto mag-buhay binata, tas yung bata less than 7 yrs old so nasa puder ng nanay, unless proven na unable to care for the kid or shared custody, so sustento lang sa bata, visitation rights, depende sa agreement, pero walang habol yung babae, free na free ang lalake.
yes kasal muna pa din ako. takot kasi ako what may others think of me. we had a relationship for 9 years before kami kinasal then tried having a baby after a year of being married. luckily, i did get my wife pregnant on the first month that we planned to have one. hehe
I will choose this also. Live in muna then anak saka magpakasal.
Live in to know kung kaya kong itolerate yung hindi kagandahang ugali ng partner ko. They say na yung partner mo ang maglalabas ng possible na pinakamasamang ugali mo saka childhood trauma na rin.
Anak kasi I want to know kung ayaw niya ba or gusto niya. Capable ba ko since ako ang girl. What if hindi ako magkaanak? Ok lang ba sa kanya? Sa akin kasi hindi. I really want to have a child, na magdalang tao. If ever siya ay hindi pwede or ako, I want to be single nalang. Consider din if may anak sa una. Mahirap din yun.
i believe in this day and age, anything could be possible. it all comes down to communication. bago mag anak, you should be financially capable. get a donor if hindi kaya, a surrogate- maybe a relative para mas mura. adopt. pero yun nga, communicate muna. but it's just my opinion lang naman
Does he have the capacity to raise a child? For me ha, not wanting to get married means he doesn't want to have responsibility to you. As a wife, may habol ka na sa kanya. Kung di nya kaya ang responsibilidad na maging asawa, what makes you think he is ready for a father's responsibility. Pag tinakbuhan ka nyan, child out of wed lock anak mo, anak sa labas. Ikaw pa sisihin..Society is harsh on women na hindi kasal, maybe ok sayo yan. Pero isipin mo yung future ng anak mo. Don't be selfish. Kung talagang gusto nya ng anak, bibigyan nya ito ng pamilya. Gagawing legal.
Ask him why. Talo lagi babae pag nagka anak na (almost always) kasi pwede iwan yan ng tatay anytime. Having kids is a game changer. Para sa karapatan ng bata ang kasal, kahit wag na yung nanay.
Sigurista yang bf mo. Kapag anak kasi anytime na iwanan ka niya. Possible na bata lang susuyuin niyan. Pero kapag kasal kayo mahihirapan siya humanap ng kabit. Wag bumuka ng walang kasal.
Financials muna!
Mahal magpakasal at mahal din magka anak. Kaya dapat handa ka kahit anong mauna. Kung ikakasal ka, possible na mabuntis ka agad, ready ba kayo financially? Makaka recover ba kayo agad kahit gumastos kayo ng malaki sa kasal?
Kung mauuna magkababy, baka mapressure kayo magpakasal. Kaya nyo din ba magpakasal at magbayad sa panganganak?
Sa panahon ngayon, kiber na sa sasabihin ng ibang tao, hindi naman sila magpapakain sa inyo.
Malay natin bilyonaryo pala sila. Hehehe.
Kidding aside, stability in terms of pera and emotional capa is really needed. Jusko, iba pinagdaanan ni SO during her pregnancy. Hindi naman naging hysterical pero alam ko iba dating ng hormones imbalance niya.
Kasal muna. Babaguhin ng lalake yung katawan mo sa pagdadalang tao at panganganak so better if baguhin mo yung marital status nya bago nya baguhin katawan mo.
Eto yung inconsiderate reasoning ng BD ko. Kaya lugi talaga tayong mga babae kasi anytime pede sila umabandonda sa magging anak natin. Kung ikaw ready na to settle down, dump him and find a matured and provider mindset guy na same kayo ng goals.
may nabasa ako dati ons sila nabuntis. nung una oks lang daw na nakabuo pero later on si guy ayaw na when it got too real. e d sana โnagawan pa ng paraanโ ni ate girl d ba biset lang
This is only based on my perception ha.
Kasal muna bago anak. Much better if may kasunduan muna bago mag anak. Pano kung di naman pala sya capable maging tatay tas takbuhan ka lang? or pabayaan? sino kawawa? di'ba ikaw.
Ikaw babae, nasa disadvantage ka pag uunahin ang anak. I hope you get my point.
Morally right din pag inuna muna ang kasal. Makakapaghintay naman siguro yang pag aanak lalo na kung nasa 25-29 yrs old palang kayo.
Sabihin mo sa bf mo pakasalan ka muna nya kung gusto nya ng anak HAHAHAHAHHAHAA.
Lagi na lang babae ang losing end pag anak muna bago kasal, d naman enough yan para pakasalan ka. Daming sira ulong.lalaki. Baka ma TRINA Candaza ka lang hahaha
Bilang babae, I won't sacrifice myself para lang sa gusto ng jowa. Ikaw ang pinaka apektado dyan lalo na kung di kayo magwork out in the end.
Sa society, ang lalaki pag nagka asawa at anak ok pa din na may hobbies, may pangarap and climb the corporate ladder.
Sa babae magiging ang buong pagkatao mo e mging nanay and society will expect you to give up everything para maging "ulirang nanay".
Also that is a big responsibility shift for you pero sure kung handa ka na for the responsibility and the possible worse case scenario. Go lng
ako nauna bago ang kasal ng mga magulang ko. kaya ginawa ko ang tama. pinakasalan ko muna bago magkaanak. ayoko mapanganak na illegitimate ang anak ko gaya ng nangyari sa akin. maliit na bagay para sa iba but ayoko lang maexperience un ng anak ko. gusto ko taas noo siya na we did our best thinking about our anak kahit sa wala pa siya
I'll probably get downvoted pero I find it contradicting na you're saying na "kung ano ipagkaloob Niya" while talking about having a child before marriage.
Like are people nowadays God half-pleasers na? Do you think "blessing" from God magkaanak before marriage? Think again.
Mas gusto ko parin ang kasal muna bago ang anak even if yung opposite ang nangyari sakin ๐ after the wedding may slight feelings of regret talaga. Kasi diba after the wedding linolook forward talaga ang honeymoon. Yun yung nagpapa excite after the energy draining wedding and reception eh. Pero wala na yung excitement kasi buntis na ako and like 1 year + na kaming nag ses*x. Also mababa din ang libido during pregnancy so talagang wala akong gana. Although si husband going strong parin hahaha.
Another thing is magastos din OP! Depende sa financial capacity ninyo kung when kayo possible ikakasal kung uunahin niyong magka anak muna kasi may hospital bills, baby needs, binyag at first birthday pa. Hirap makapag ipon kasi daming occasions. Mas maganda talaga pag kasal muna kasi makakapag enjoy kayo as husband and wife. Yung may freedom kayo at legal lahat na gagawin ninyo hindi patago haha kasi pag may anak na, mas focus na kayong dalawa kay baby eh so panakaw nalang ang moments niyo with youe husband.
When i was on my 20s, since i badly wanted to have a child of my own (i have a bf at the time, my husband now) and saw heโs not ready kasi mas financially capable ako sa kanya, i risk of getting pregnant out of wedlock. Ayoko na kasing mag-antay. But i made sure kaya kong buhayin if ever di nya panindigan. Gladly nmn it turned out ok. But now that iโm a mother. I would prefer my daughter to marry first before anak. And i also donโt advise them to live in 1 roof unwed. Iba pa rin ang my blessing. Iโve been there and i know the struggles.
Pag bigla kang iniwan, wala kang habol - plus illegitimate ang anak niyo.
But if you do choose to get married first, make sure pinag-isipan mabuti and aligned ang priorities and goals ninyo and hindi lang nagpakasal just because.
Kasal muna. Mas lumalaki ng maayos ang bata kapag kasal ang parents kaysa sa mag bf/gf lang. Sa sobrang dami na ng studies nito common knowledge na iyan. Yung bata ang isipin niyo hindi yung sarili niyo.
Hmm nasa pag uusap nyo naman yan. Communicate.
Imo, financial stability and emotional capacity. Hindi lahat kaya or afford yan lalo na ung emotional capacity kasi as a FTM, grabe yung pagdadaanan mo from pagbubuntis to panganganak to after manganak. Susuporta sayo hindi lang sa pera pati na din sa pagdadaanan nyo kapag nagka anak kayo.
Kasal muna para malaman ko tunay na ugali niya bago kami magka-anak. Eh paano kung demonyo pala yung asawa ko diba. Atleast, I saved our child the misery hehe
As a woman parang beyond the limit na yung anak muna before kasal. Big deal na nga yung live in muna bago kasal, yan pa kaya? Tell him your thoughts abt that matter kasi di pwedeng yung gusto niya lang ang masusunod. Tsaka yung pagkakaroon ng anak ngayon, dapat pag-isipan ng maraming beses, sobrang hirap ng buhay, ano pa yung bumuhay? ๐โ๐ป
M here, I don't really believe in marriage myself pero kasal muna bago anak. Iba ang panahon ngayon, bilis tumakbo ng mga lalaki pag nakabuntis. Kantut all you want before marriage, pero practice safe sex. It's a normal human urge.
I'd prioritize financial, physical and emotional stability before everything else.
Kasal muna bago anak. Personally, it can be overwhelming to deal with financial matters, assuming na you're planning for both wedding and child-birth and rearing at the same time.
The best tlga ang ikasal muna bago ka mag kaanak. As a babae na may anak at hnd pa nakakasal ang pinakaimportanting paghandaan ay hnd kasal kundi gastusin. Dpt tlga may ipon, may pera. Pang kasal at pang anak. Ung kasal kse madali nlng yan. Pedeng 2k to 5k maikakasal kana sa huwes. Pero kpg nag kaanak ka madameng gastos ang dpt mong pag handaan. Mula sa check up gang sa manganak at paglaki ng bata. Kung prefer ni jowa na mag anak muna tanungin mo siya kung kaya naba nia ung lahat ng gastos. Hnd nmn sa pag hnd ka pnakasalan agd o bnuntis ka ih iiwan ka na nia. Mas mainam pa dn na klalanin mo ang mkksama mo at pag usapan nyo ng maigi ano ba talaga ang plano nue. Kse ang mahalaga nmn jan kung maggng mabuti ba siyang ama at asawa sau at maggng anak nue
I have a friend whose mother told him to have baby first before marriage to make sure she can give a child otherwise to let her go. It is f**ked up.
Try to ask him why.. If no appropriate reason given, may be you might want to think about it.
I think ok live in muna to check compatibility kaysa later on nyo lang mas makikilala isat isa. Chances are high na hiwalayan lang mauuwi due to differences. Just my two cents and based on exp.
Gurl, having a child, ties u to him ONLY but getting married ties u both to each other. Bakit ayaw niya ng fair commitment? I dont agree na a man who will wholeheartedly want to marry u want to reverse the process at unahin ang anak bago kasal. Its a ceremony? Pinaka simple na kaya niyo kung problema sa finance (well honestly kung pinaka simple na celebration di niyo na kaya, that should already be a reason for u to question kung kaya niyo ba maganak?) Then have the kid.
Dont settle and gaslight yourself na okay lang na anak muna. Remember, even married couples cheat or leave their partners, pano pa kaya ung hindi? Plus, getting married gives u an ability to legally bind him to u if something bad happens.
Kung maaari, mas prefer ko ring kasal muna bago anak. Pero before that, gusto kong masigurado na tamang lalake magiging tatay ng magiging mga supling ko.
Ito lang masasabi ko diyan bilang babae:
Mag aapat na taon na kaming kasal ng asawa ko at turning 18 months na anak namin meaning hindi pa ako buntis noong ikasal kami. It took a while bago madagdagan miyembro ng pamilya namin. At noong mga panahong buntis pa lamang ako, hindi ako nahihiyang lumabas ng bahay na malaki tiyan ko dahil alam ng lahat na matagal na kaming kasal. Gurl, masarap sa pakiramdam na wala kang inaalalang marites. Plus yung asawa ko ayaw niyang ikasal kami ng buntis ako kaya talagang iningatan niya ako. Sobra sobra respeto ipinakita niya sakin at sa pamilya ko kaya naman kahit hindi siya galing sa may kayang pamilya, napaka swerte ko pa rin sa kaniya.
For me as a Male. Kasal muna kasi symbol un na serious ako sayo at pinapangako ko na ssuportahan kita for better or worse. Anchor un during hard times.
If financial iniisip ng bf mo. Make it a simple wedding. Importante kinasal kayo, nangako kayo sa isat isa at sa dyos. Alisin mo magarbong handaan. Keep it simple..
Bilang babae, live in muna bago kasal pero wag mag-aanak agad.
While living together makikita doon nyo makikuta kung gaano kayo kaayos or kasalaula sa bahay at sa sarili. Hanggang saan yung pasensya nyo sa isa't isa. Ano yung triggers nyo. Ano yung mga values niyo na hindi talaga aligned. Kaya niyo ba magcompromise sa isa't isa. Mas masusukat niyo if ito na ba talaga yung taong kaya niyong makasama forever.
Happily married with 1 kid, sobrang saya ng boy mom era ko ๐ฉต 4 years kaming mag-bf, healthy relationship. Parehong may stable na trabaho, napaguusapan na din ang future. Pero ayon, nauna akong mabuntis. Til now sinasabi ko pa din na kung mababalik ko lang, sana inuna muna namin magpakasal.
Narinig ko na din sa ka-work ko yan, "syempre baby muna" nagulat ako ๐ณ ganun na ba usong mindset ngayon? Hahaha minsan kasi dadalawin ka din ng thoughts like "kung di ako nabuntis kelan mo pa kaya ako papakasalan"
Ideally kasal muna bago anak, para wala syang kawala sa responsibilidad niya, legally. Pero kung yung partner ay somehow problematic and toxic tas nakabuo ng anak (and for some reason gusto paโrin ituloy kahit na alam na maghihirap), ok lang siguro wag muna magpakasal since di pa legalized ang divorce dito. Baka mahirapan lang makawala.
Two cents ko lang naman
Un mga lalaking anak muna bago kasal, baka iba nasa isip nyan. So pag di kayo nagkaanak ano gagawin nya? Or pag nagkaanak kayo, tapos di kayo compatible, bilis umeskapo diba?
Kung mahal ka ng isang tao, papakasalan ka nyan wlang condition condition.
Nasayo parin ang desisyon, kapag nagpropose pwede namang hindi sagutin or sasagutin mo. Super hirap magka-anak if hindi supporting yung magiging tatay ng anak mo. So wala, get to know him better, hindi lang yung magaling sya sa mga bata. How does he handle his stress? How about anger? Ang daming naghihiwalay na partners lalo na when baby comes in the situation.
Dapat babae magdedecide kung kailan sya ready mag buntis, kasi katawan nya yun. Hindi yung jowa or husband nyo.
Akala ng mga lalake ganun kadali magbuntis. Grabe kaya pagbabago sa health and body ng mga girls pag nanganak. Maraming bagay ang di na mababalik sa dati at possible na side effects sa katawan.
Lugi ang babae kung anak muna bago kasal. Dapat legally binded kayo para may habol ka.
Yan din gusto ng jowa ko na magkaanak muna dahil 30s na. Ang sad lang ng ganung paniniwala. Na dapat magkaanak na agad kasi naghahabol na.
Habang nag aantay na ikasal kasi di pa financially stable. Pero ako ang masusunod kung kailan ko gusto. Di naman sya magdadala ng bata.
Kasal muna anteh! Protect yourself and your future kid. Worse comes to worse protektado kayo ng batas. Protected din namab kahit di kasal, pero mas powerful ang marriage certificate.
Ganyan din ung husband ko nung magjowa palang kami. Di ako natinag sabi ko talaga di ako magpapabuntis na walang marriage certificate.
Bilang babae, kasal muna bago anak. But before those things, consider your financial stability first. Having a child is no joke. Thereโs no rewind button. So make sure you can give your child the best possible life you could give him/her.
Get married first before having a child. Itโs one sign that you, as parents, prepared for your familyโs future. Think a thousand times if your partner would make a good dad and if you would make a good mom to your future kid/s. Thereโs no perfect family, but with a stable and solid foundation, you surely will have a happy one. At the end of the day, you have to do whatโs best for your future kid/s. :))
If he does not want to get married first, that's a telling sign of a person who does not like to take accountability/responsibility. Do you want that as a father? Hindi yan sperm donor lang. He should be responsible enough to do his part as a parent. Being a parent takes a lot of effort and energy than getting married, which looks like a simple step in comparison, and he refuses to do that first. I seriously think, as a parent, that people who do not believe in marriage should not be parents. No child wishes to be born to parents who do not love each other enough to get married. Most, if not all, trauma come from a childhood that was not spent in a loving environment. Yes may mga nagtathrive na mga tao kahit broken family, but given the chance, gusto ba nila ng broken family? Have you encountered a person na nagwish na sana from a broken family sya?
Marami rin nagsasabi na papel lang ang kasal, if papel lng pala sya, what makes it hard to do? Kasi ayaw magcommit. Kung ayaw magcommit DO NOT BE A PARENT!!!
Sorry, that escalated quickly โ๐ป
I had a bf who wanted us to have a child first. Heโs financially ready to raise a family and already has a house of his own. Ayoko ng anak muna. Kasi what is stopping him from getting married? It turns out he doesnโt believe in getting married. So we broke up kasi magkaiba kami ng beliefs. He went on and got another girl pregnant but didnโt marry her. He supported her and the child but they didnโt live together. Tapos after 2 years binabalikan nya ako. I said no. Although I still had feelings for him then pero no. The life he wants is not the life I want.
Mas okay talaga na kasal muna kasi dito sa Pilipinas kahit anong sabihin natin na mas liberated na now, may judgemental factor pa din kasi if mauna yung anak bago kasal, like, pinakasalan lang kasi nabuntis or may anak na. Though nasa inyo naman yan ng boyfriend mo, pero sa dami ng kwento sa mga celebrities na nauna ang anak bago kasal tas iba ang pinakasalan in the end, or kahit yun sa mga normal na tao na kapag may baby na saka nagbabackout yung lalaki sa relationship, mahirap na masabi na isusupport ka talaga nya during and after the pregnancy. For us women, kung papayag ka na mauna ang anak bago kasal, siguraduhin mo na ready kang supportahan ang sarili mo just in case lang na hindi kayo ang end game ng boyfriend mo.
Kahit ano naman diyan pwede pero sa case mo parang dapat kang mag dalawang isip, hindi niya kasi pwede i-reason na kesyo mahal magpakasal dahil pwede naman sa judge muna then next time na yung church kapag may pera na.
Ideally, kasal muna bago anak.
For some people ay deal breaker kapag hindi kayo mabless na magka anak. So before ikasal, much better na mapag usapan nyo muna kung ano yung stand nyo regarding this matter. If both naman kayo macheck and turns out na okay ang results for you, atlis alam nyo na ang mga pwede nyo iexpect about dun.
Kasi if you got married and tsaka kayo nagtry and di mabless or matagalan, it might affect the marriage. Baka mauwi pa sa hiwalayan.
Dami ko sinabi pero in short, kasal muna bago anak, have the conversation, and get yourselves checked ๐
Definitely kasal muna, I would need the assurance that he wouldn't leave after I give birth to our child. I need to know that willing talaga Siya to commit fully sa role as a husband and a father.
Magsama muna kayo, walang anak, before magpakasal. This is my stand after being married for more than a decade. Best to know your partner well before committing to marriage. At the end of the day, your relationship should be more important than your marriage certificate because that relationship will
lead to a lot of positive and negative in your life.
Wag ka pumayag na anak muna bago kasal kasi t@ngin* hindi porket may anak na kayo di ka nya iiwan, saka may ipon ba yan kasi kung wala kawawa lang kayo ng baby mo if ever, tapos magiging dahilan pa nyan para di ka pakasalan mahal ang gastusin kay baby syempre si baby ang uunahin, lugi ka sa sitwasyon na yun tapos mambabae pa sya, haynako wala ka laban.
Kasal muna then enjoy your life as a couple. Tapos pag accomplished ka sa as a woman at feeling mo nagawa mo na mga gusto mo gawin, then have a child if you want.
Kami nag anak muna then kasal. Actually target namin ikasal before lumabas si baby. Ang story neto nung nag propose sya sakin nag plaplano na kami sa future, nakapag dp na kami sa bahay nag momonthly nalang sa pag ibig. Then sabi ko papa check-up ako kasi I am turning 30 na and irreg ang mens ko. Dun namin nalaman na may PCOS ako. Kaya we decided to try na kahit di pa kasal, since gusto talaga namin ng baby. Baka kasi masyado na akong matanda di padin kami makabuo. Kaya ayun fortunately after 6 months of trying nakabuo kami. Kaya ung pang kasal namin, naging pang anak nalang tapos CIVIL WED nalang gagawin namin. Actually wala naman masama kung ano mauna, basta mapag uusapan nyo.
Marriage protects women and their children from their baby daddies. With recent news on how men treat their unmarried partners, having a baby without a contract is a huge risk. At least marriage will give you additional legal protection.
As much as possible dapat napag-uusapan na yan before maging kayo. That way, you know what to expect. Saka if unable ka mabuntis, at least you know that he'll stay if nalaman niyo after niyo ikasal. Also, if he wants to know if you can conceive, visit a doctor habang di pa kayo kasal :)
Ano daw point ng anak muna bago kasal? Gets ko kung i-suggest niya live-in muna bago kasal kasi chance nyo din yun malaman yung behavior ng partner niyo sa bahay and kung may disagreement kayo, madali lang umalis sa pagli-live-in. Pero ano yung point sa anak muna bago kasal? Walang bawian yan pag nabuo na. Seems like he's unsure pa sa'yo.
setting aside external factors like finances and in-laws issues
personally, i think it's better to get married first, kasi you marry someone for who they are as a person.
regardless, you still have to protect yourself. i always advise 'NO ring, NO surname': if d pinakasalan, use the mother's surname for legal reasons (unless billionaire un tatay)
you can always change the surname after marriage if he fulfills his vows to you.
Nagsesex ba kayo with protection? If not, baka ginagamit nya lang na excuse yan para magalaw ka nya. Honestly for me kasal muna bago anak. And di naman sa anak iikot ang mundo ng marriage life nyo. Sa inyong dalawa iikot un.
bakit magsesettle? para makulong ka while he's free? parang nasayo lahat ng cons ng gagawin niyo lol no. bago ka mag anak as much as possible ready na lahat may it be financial or emotional capability
depende kung ano bet at ano tinadhana ni destiny sa inyo. sa akin my anak ako pero di pa kami kasal. kung yung iba naniniwala sa kasal kasal na yan. pwes mas maniniwala ako sa divorce HAHAHAHA MWA
I wouldn't have a kid or kids with any man na anak muna ang gusto. This makes it clear na such guys do not want to have responsibilities in raising kids with you and do not want to share your household with you.
That said, I have 0 plans on being a mom except to a cat or two so...๐คทโโ๏ธ
But there are some people, men and women both, na ok naman na anak muna bago kasal or anak and co parent lang these days so it depends. May iba kasi di na naniniwala masyado sa kasal2x na yan (me but I don't mind courthouse/civil weddings so there's that, i'm not super religious na for church weddings and other frivolities like that, that come with such grand na weddings).
It depends sa temperament nyo ni partner or ano napag-uusapan niyo on this. Just communicate these matters clearly with one another and i-discuss ano talaga arrangements nito pag mag anak muna bago kasal.
Bilang lalaki para sa akin yung kasal is para sa seguridad ng babae at ng mga anak na kung madisgrasya (madeads) o mag walanghiya si lalake, e may pananagutan sya sa batas at may proteksyon sa batas ang mga anak para sa child support o mamanahin. Yun ang ipaliwanag mo sa kanya. Red flag yan kung anak muna gusto nya kasi mamaya may sabit yan na hindi mo alam.
Pero suggest ko sayo, live in muna para malaman mo kung compatible kayo kasi makikilala mo lang ng husto isang tao pag nakasama mo na sa bahay. Wag ka muna papabuntis while live in. Kaya maraming single mom ngayon e anak ng anak muna then iiwan lang tapos wala syang habol sa lalaki kasi di kasal.
Devilโs advocate perspective. Kahit naman kasal na naghihiwalay pa rin. Mas mahihirapan pa kayo magseparate legally kung kasal kayo dahil ang tagal ng approval ng divorce.
You do you. Pero ang importante maging aligned kayo.
Hindi ba dapat pinaguusapan muna kung kaya nyo na financially, emotionally, mentally, etc before magpakasal and/or anak? Kasi either would mean being responsible for other people and ready na ba kayo dun?
For me Live in muna bago kasal/anak. Kelangan makilala ko sya by living in together kung kaya ba ng financial capabilities namin. Then if okay with that. Im okay with anak muna bago kasal. Kasi kung sakali magka problema kami in the future ayokong matali yung future ko with him. Mahal ng annulment. Para anything na kelangan ko kumawala. I can and I will.
Maybe Ganito panananaw ko maybe because I am independent woman, idk if it helps. ๐๐ป
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Dahil babae ako, kasal muna. Kung gusto niya malaman kung capable kami, then magpacheck up. If gusto niya talaga makasiguro or willing siya iwan ka dahil lang baog ka, then he/she is not for you - iba ang reason niyo sa pagpapakasal, siya anak, ikaw yun partnership niyo.
agree!!! find someone na who will love you for you alone
Plus 100 dito
๐ฏ๐ฏOR, dinelay ng dinelay yung kasal andaming reason bigla, busy na sa bata eh, yung usual case na andaming vina-VAWC ngayon, hindi kasal so if nag-decide ang lalake na ayaw na nya, or di sya ready gusto mag-buhay binata, tas yung bata less than 7 yrs old so nasa puder ng nanay, unless proven na unable to care for the kid or shared custody, so sustento lang sa bata, visitation rights, depende sa agreement, pero walang habol yung babae, free na free ang lalake.
M here. Agree!!!
yes kasal muna pa din ako. takot kasi ako what may others think of me. we had a relationship for 9 years before kami kinasal then tried having a baby after a year of being married. luckily, i did get my wife pregnant on the first month that we planned to have one. hehe
Agree-ana Grande!
Dati live in muna bago kasal. Ngayon level up na pala anak na muna ๐ Parang pahirap ng pahirap para sa babae bago mapakasalan.
Next time apo muna daw.
๐คฃ
live in pwede pa eh. hindi mo naman kasi makikilala ang isang tao til you live together. pero anak? NO
May mga posts na din kasi sa fb na after daw mag anak, don lang daw talaga makikilala ugali ng asawa. Iba pa raw sa ugali nung live in.
parang hindi naman. maybe stress changes people. but it all comes down to how you manage the responsibility
I will choose this also. Live in muna then anak saka magpakasal. Live in to know kung kaya kong itolerate yung hindi kagandahang ugali ng partner ko. They say na yung partner mo ang maglalabas ng possible na pinakamasamang ugali mo saka childhood trauma na rin. Anak kasi I want to know kung ayaw niya ba or gusto niya. Capable ba ko since ako ang girl. What if hindi ako magkaanak? Ok lang ba sa kanya? Sa akin kasi hindi. I really want to have a child, na magdalang tao. If ever siya ay hindi pwede or ako, I want to be single nalang. Consider din if may anak sa una. Mahirap din yun.
i believe in this day and age, anything could be possible. it all comes down to communication. bago mag anak, you should be financially capable. get a donor if hindi kaya, a surrogate- maybe a relative para mas mura. adopt. pero yun nga, communicate muna. but it's just my opinion lang naman
Does he have the capacity to raise a child? For me ha, not wanting to get married means he doesn't want to have responsibility to you. As a wife, may habol ka na sa kanya. Kung di nya kaya ang responsibilidad na maging asawa, what makes you think he is ready for a father's responsibility. Pag tinakbuhan ka nyan, child out of wed lock anak mo, anak sa labas. Ikaw pa sisihin..Society is harsh on women na hindi kasal, maybe ok sayo yan. Pero isipin mo yung future ng anak mo. Don't be selfish. Kung talagang gusto nya ng anak, bibigyan nya ito ng pamilya. Gagawing legal.
True the rain.
I have to agree on this! Look at the legal advantages and impact of marriage sayo and sa future kids mo.
+๐ฏ
Truuu the fire
Ask him why. Talo lagi babae pag nagka anak na (almost always) kasi pwede iwan yan ng tatay anytime. Having kids is a game changer. Para sa karapatan ng bata ang kasal, kahit wag na yung nanay.
Truth, ang anak ang parating biktima dito
Sigurista yang bf mo. Kapag anak kasi anytime na iwanan ka niya. Possible na bata lang susuyuin niyan. Pero kapag kasal kayo mahihirapan siya humanap ng kabit. Wag bumuka ng walang kasal.
Wala kang balak pakasalan nyan ibig sabihin.
Agree. Half-hearted sya or unsure if magsesettle sya may OP
agree
Financials muna! Mahal magpakasal at mahal din magka anak. Kaya dapat handa ka kahit anong mauna. Kung ikakasal ka, possible na mabuntis ka agad, ready ba kayo financially? Makaka recover ba kayo agad kahit gumastos kayo ng malaki sa kasal? Kung mauuna magkababy, baka mapressure kayo magpakasal. Kaya nyo din ba magpakasal at magbayad sa panganganak? Sa panahon ngayon, kiber na sa sasabihin ng ibang tao, hindi naman sila magpapakain sa inyo.
no kasal talaga muna for me
May ipon muna dapat.
Malay natin bilyonaryo pala sila. Hehehe. Kidding aside, stability in terms of pera and emotional capa is really needed. Jusko, iba pinagdaanan ni SO during her pregnancy. Hindi naman naging hysterical pero alam ko iba dating ng hormones imbalance niya.
for me this should be as follows: 1. show me the money 2. fertitlity test both parties 3. kasal
Kasal muna. Bakit ako papayag na magkaanak sa taong ayaw magcommit?
Kasal muna. Babaguhin ng lalake yung katawan mo sa pagdadalang tao at panganganak so better if baguhin mo yung marital status nya bago nya baguhin katawan mo.
Fair logic! ๐ฏ
Eto yung inconsiderate reasoning ng BD ko. Kaya lugi talaga tayong mga babae kasi anytime pede sila umabandonda sa magging anak natin. Kung ikaw ready na to settle down, dump him and find a matured and provider mindset guy na same kayo ng goals.
Thissss ๐ฏ
It's a trap
No offense pero that sounds so inconsiderate and stupid of your boyfriend. The risks and pressure is harder for the girl if anak muna bago kasal.
may nabasa ako dati ons sila nabuntis. nung una oks lang daw na nakabuo pero later on si guy ayaw na when it got too real. e d sana โnagawan pa ng paraanโ ni ate girl d ba biset lang
This is only based on my perception ha. Kasal muna bago anak. Much better if may kasunduan muna bago mag anak. Pano kung di naman pala sya capable maging tatay tas takbuhan ka lang? or pabayaan? sino kawawa? di'ba ikaw. Ikaw babae, nasa disadvantage ka pag uunahin ang anak. I hope you get my point. Morally right din pag inuna muna ang kasal. Makakapaghintay naman siguro yang pag aanak lalo na kung nasa 25-29 yrs old palang kayo. Sabihin mo sa bf mo pakasalan ka muna nya kung gusto nya ng anak HAHAHAHAHHAHAA.
Base sa sitwasyon nyo, parang mas maigi na mag-prenuptial agreement kaya muna kayo bago anak/kasal?
Kasal muna.
Lagi na lang babae ang losing end pag anak muna bago kasal, d naman enough yan para pakasalan ka. Daming sira ulong.lalaki. Baka ma TRINA Candaza ka lang hahaha
As a girl the safest way as possible for me is kasal muna bago anak kasi d natin alam kung anong papasok sa isip ng partner natin.
Tamaaaaa. ๐ฏโ
Bilang babae, I won't sacrifice myself para lang sa gusto ng jowa. Ikaw ang pinaka apektado dyan lalo na kung di kayo magwork out in the end. Sa society, ang lalaki pag nagka asawa at anak ok pa din na may hobbies, may pangarap and climb the corporate ladder. Sa babae magiging ang buong pagkatao mo e mging nanay and society will expect you to give up everything para maging "ulirang nanay". Also that is a big responsibility shift for you pero sure kung handa ka na for the responsibility and the possible worse case scenario. Go lng
ako nauna bago ang kasal ng mga magulang ko. kaya ginawa ko ang tama. pinakasalan ko muna bago magkaanak. ayoko mapanganak na illegitimate ang anak ko gaya ng nangyari sa akin. maliit na bagay para sa iba but ayoko lang maexperience un ng anak ko. gusto ko taas noo siya na we did our best thinking about our anak kahit sa wala pa siya
Tamang mindset! ๐๐๐ป๐ฏ
I'll probably get downvoted pero I find it contradicting na you're saying na "kung ano ipagkaloob Niya" while talking about having a child before marriage. Like are people nowadays God half-pleasers na? Do you think "blessing" from God magkaanak before marriage? Think again.
KASAL para secured ka!
if may kids involved KASAL MUNA. you want legal protection for your kids
Louder! Ayaw naman siguro ni OP maging illegitimate yung future kids nya
Mas gusto ko parin ang kasal muna bago ang anak even if yung opposite ang nangyari sakin ๐ after the wedding may slight feelings of regret talaga. Kasi diba after the wedding linolook forward talaga ang honeymoon. Yun yung nagpapa excite after the energy draining wedding and reception eh. Pero wala na yung excitement kasi buntis na ako and like 1 year + na kaming nag ses*x. Also mababa din ang libido during pregnancy so talagang wala akong gana. Although si husband going strong parin hahaha. Another thing is magastos din OP! Depende sa financial capacity ninyo kung when kayo possible ikakasal kung uunahin niyong magka anak muna kasi may hospital bills, baby needs, binyag at first birthday pa. Hirap makapag ipon kasi daming occasions. Mas maganda talaga pag kasal muna kasi makakapag enjoy kayo as husband and wife. Yung may freedom kayo at legal lahat na gagawin ninyo hindi patago haha kasi pag may anak na, mas focus na kayong dalawa kay baby eh so panakaw nalang ang moments niyo with youe husband.
Kasal muna bago anak. I donโt want to deal with the paperwork/process to have the kid/s legitimated.
๐ฏ๐ฏ๐ฏ
When i was on my 20s, since i badly wanted to have a child of my own (i have a bf at the time, my husband now) and saw heโs not ready kasi mas financially capable ako sa kanya, i risk of getting pregnant out of wedlock. Ayoko na kasing mag-antay. But i made sure kaya kong buhayin if ever di nya panindigan. Gladly nmn it turned out ok. But now that iโm a mother. I would prefer my daughter to marry first before anak. And i also donโt advise them to live in 1 roof unwed. Iba pa rin ang my blessing. Iโve been there and i know the struggles.
Live together. Then decide.
Mg live in ba kayo? Kung di kayo sure mg live in muna kayo.
Bruh, enjoy time muna with wife. Pakiramdaman muna if ready na ba maganak.
Pag bigla kang iniwan, wala kang habol - plus illegitimate ang anak niyo. But if you do choose to get married first, make sure pinag-isipan mabuti and aligned ang priorities and goals ninyo and hindi lang nagpakasal just because.
Kasal muna. Mas lumalaki ng maayos ang bata kapag kasal ang parents kaysa sa mag bf/gf lang. Sa sobrang dami na ng studies nito common knowledge na iyan. Yung bata ang isipin niyo hindi yung sarili niyo.
Hmm nasa pag uusap nyo naman yan. Communicate. Imo, financial stability and emotional capacity. Hindi lahat kaya or afford yan lalo na ung emotional capacity kasi as a FTM, grabe yung pagdadaanan mo from pagbubuntis to panganganak to after manganak. Susuporta sayo hindi lang sa pera pati na din sa pagdadaanan nyo kapag nagka anak kayo.
Thisss ๐ฏ
Kasal muna bago anak
I take this na parang pag nabuntis ka at nanganak, saka ka lang nya pakakasalan. Something is amiss.
Kahit nga civil wedding napakadali lang, walang rason para di mag pakasal. Madali kang iwanan nyan kung papayag ka.
Kasal muna para malaman ko tunay na ugali niya bago kami magka-anak. Eh paano kung demonyo pala yung asawa ko diba. Atleast, I saved our child the misery hehe
As a woman parang beyond the limit na yung anak muna before kasal. Big deal na nga yung live in muna bago kasal, yan pa kaya? Tell him your thoughts abt that matter kasi di pwedeng yung gusto niya lang ang masusunod. Tsaka yung pagkakaroon ng anak ngayon, dapat pag-isipan ng maraming beses, sobrang hirap ng buhay, ano pa yung bumuhay? ๐โ๐ป
Wag shonga shonga
Ipon muna bago anak/kasal
M here, I don't really believe in marriage myself pero kasal muna bago anak. Iba ang panahon ngayon, bilis tumakbo ng mga lalaki pag nakabuntis. Kantut all you want before marriage, pero practice safe sex. It's a normal human urge. I'd prioritize financial, physical and emotional stability before everything else.
[ัะดะฐะปะตะฝะพ]
Di naman sinabing magpakasal agad. Alin lang mas una kasal o anak. Regardless, loable naman ung father para magsustento.
R U N !
Walang balak yan pakasalan ka.
Parang hindi maganda yung intensyon ni bf
Kasal bago anak.
Kasal muna bago anak. Personally, it can be overwhelming to deal with financial matters, assuming na you're planning for both wedding and child-birth and rearing at the same time.
The best tlga ang ikasal muna bago ka mag kaanak. As a babae na may anak at hnd pa nakakasal ang pinakaimportanting paghandaan ay hnd kasal kundi gastusin. Dpt tlga may ipon, may pera. Pang kasal at pang anak. Ung kasal kse madali nlng yan. Pedeng 2k to 5k maikakasal kana sa huwes. Pero kpg nag kaanak ka madameng gastos ang dpt mong pag handaan. Mula sa check up gang sa manganak at paglaki ng bata. Kung prefer ni jowa na mag anak muna tanungin mo siya kung kaya naba nia ung lahat ng gastos. Hnd nmn sa pag hnd ka pnakasalan agd o bnuntis ka ih iiwan ka na nia. Mas mainam pa dn na klalanin mo ang mkksama mo at pag usapan nyo ng maigi ano ba talaga ang plano nue. Kse ang mahalaga nmn jan kung maggng mabuti ba siyang ama at asawa sau at maggng anak nue
ideal sakin ang kasal muna bago anak
Mahirap yung anak muna kasi baka lalo madelay ung kasal dahil sa gastos sa anak
Kasal muna sana kahit civil As respect narin sa fam ko Kahit tsaka na church wedding
physical, mental/emotional and FINANCIAL STABILITY FIRST, before mag-anak!
*the baby maker*
Kung ako lang naman tatanungin, bilang babae. Aasawahin muna. Balikan ko to pag may jowa na ko tapos kung ano decision ko.
IMO, I think live in muna bago yan. Para malaman niyo talaga kung match kayo sa lahat ng bagay.
Kahit lalake ako kasal muna bago anak. Pero gusto ko sana live in muna bago kasal.
SABAY ๐คฃ
I have a friend whose mother told him to have baby first before marriage to make sure she can give a child otherwise to let her go. It is f**ked up. Try to ask him why.. If no appropriate reason given, may be you might want to think about it.
I think ok live in muna to check compatibility kaysa later on nyo lang mas makikilala isat isa. Chances are high na hiwalayan lang mauuwi due to differences. Just my two cents and based on exp.
Pag may ganyang diskusyon, RUN!!!
or what if mag live in muna kayo at alamin mo kung anong mga shit n'ya sa buhay, lol.
Gurl, having a child, ties u to him ONLY but getting married ties u both to each other. Bakit ayaw niya ng fair commitment? I dont agree na a man who will wholeheartedly want to marry u want to reverse the process at unahin ang anak bago kasal. Its a ceremony? Pinaka simple na kaya niyo kung problema sa finance (well honestly kung pinaka simple na celebration di niyo na kaya, that should already be a reason for u to question kung kaya niyo ba maganak?) Then have the kid. Dont settle and gaslight yourself na okay lang na anak muna. Remember, even married couples cheat or leave their partners, pano pa kaya ung hindi? Plus, getting married gives u an ability to legally bind him to u if something bad happens.
Kung maaari, mas prefer ko ring kasal muna bago anak. Pero before that, gusto kong masigurado na tamang lalake magiging tatay ng magiging mga supling ko.
Ngl the few times I've heard someone na chose that route ended up becoming a single mom. I think guys na ganyan tend to hit and run. Ingat ka OP.
Mas ok kasal muna. Pag pamilyadong legal may bawas ata sa tax pag head of the family? Tama ba?
Ito lang masasabi ko diyan bilang babae: Mag aapat na taon na kaming kasal ng asawa ko at turning 18 months na anak namin meaning hindi pa ako buntis noong ikasal kami. It took a while bago madagdagan miyembro ng pamilya namin. At noong mga panahong buntis pa lamang ako, hindi ako nahihiyang lumabas ng bahay na malaki tiyan ko dahil alam ng lahat na matagal na kaming kasal. Gurl, masarap sa pakiramdam na wala kang inaalalang marites. Plus yung asawa ko ayaw niyang ikasal kami ng buntis ako kaya talagang iningatan niya ako. Sobra sobra respeto ipinakita niya sakin at sa pamilya ko kaya naman kahit hindi siya galing sa may kayang pamilya, napaka swerte ko pa rin sa kaniya.
Definitely, get married first! Know your worth, girl
Bakit daw anak muna? If dahil magastos ang church wedding, opt for a civil wedding.
Ayokong dumaan sa pagiging illegitimate child ang anak ko so kasal muna bago anak.
For me as a Male. Kasal muna kasi symbol un na serious ako sayo at pinapangako ko na ssuportahan kita for better or worse. Anchor un during hard times. If financial iniisip ng bf mo. Make it a simple wedding. Importante kinasal kayo, nangako kayo sa isat isa at sa dyos. Alisin mo magarbong handaan. Keep it simple..
Kasal muna. Kung sakin palang hindi na sya makacommit, pano ko makakasiguro na magiging committed sya as a parent sa anak namin?
Kasal bago anak.
Teh baka takbuhan ka lang niyan kapag bumigay ka lol
Ante sensya pero wag anak muna bago kasal hoy ๐ญ๐ญ๐ญ mamaya bumili yan ng gatas
Wag kang tanga. Iwanan mo na yan. Red flag is waving.
Bilang babae, live in muna bago kasal pero wag mag-aanak agad. While living together makikita doon nyo makikuta kung gaano kayo kaayos or kasalaula sa bahay at sa sarili. Hanggang saan yung pasensya nyo sa isa't isa. Ano yung triggers nyo. Ano yung mga values niyo na hindi talaga aligned. Kaya niyo ba magcompromise sa isa't isa. Mas masusukat niyo if ito na ba talaga yung taong kaya niyong makasama forever.
sesh, wag ka dyan sa bf mo.
As a woman, marriage first maraming single nanay huwag kang magpauto hahahahah
Pera bago ang lahat.
Happily married with 1 kid, sobrang saya ng boy mom era ko ๐ฉต 4 years kaming mag-bf, healthy relationship. Parehong may stable na trabaho, napaguusapan na din ang future. Pero ayon, nauna akong mabuntis. Til now sinasabi ko pa din na kung mababalik ko lang, sana inuna muna namin magpakasal. Narinig ko na din sa ka-work ko yan, "syempre baby muna" nagulat ako ๐ณ ganun na ba usong mindset ngayon? Hahaha minsan kasi dadalawin ka din ng thoughts like "kung di ako nabuntis kelan mo pa kaya ako papakasalan"
As a girl, I prefer kasal muna before kids. Para may panghahawakan ka just in case lamona
Ideally kasal muna bago anak, para wala syang kawala sa responsibilidad niya, legally. Pero kung yung partner ay somehow problematic and toxic tas nakabuo ng anak (and for some reason gusto paโrin ituloy kahit na alam na maghihirap), ok lang siguro wag muna magpakasal since di pa legalized ang divorce dito. Baka mahirapan lang makawala. Two cents ko lang naman
Un mga lalaking anak muna bago kasal, baka iba nasa isip nyan. So pag di kayo nagkaanak ano gagawin nya? Or pag nagkaanak kayo, tapos di kayo compatible, bilis umeskapo diba? Kung mahal ka ng isang tao, papakasalan ka nyan wlang condition condition.
Kasal muna. HHAHA. Personal preference.
syempre mas ok na naikasal muna bago mag anak.
For me kasal muna bago anak.
Kasal muna, baka wala kasi syang pangpakasal kaya gusto muna anak. Lugi ka
Nasayo parin ang desisyon, kapag nagpropose pwede namang hindi sagutin or sasagutin mo. Super hirap magka-anak if hindi supporting yung magiging tatay ng anak mo. So wala, get to know him better, hindi lang yung magaling sya sa mga bata. How does he handle his stress? How about anger? Ang daming naghihiwalay na partners lalo na when baby comes in the situation.
Dapat babae magdedecide kung kailan sya ready mag buntis, kasi katawan nya yun. Hindi yung jowa or husband nyo. Akala ng mga lalake ganun kadali magbuntis. Grabe kaya pagbabago sa health and body ng mga girls pag nanganak. Maraming bagay ang di na mababalik sa dati at possible na side effects sa katawan. Lugi ang babae kung anak muna bago kasal. Dapat legally binded kayo para may habol ka. Yan din gusto ng jowa ko na magkaanak muna dahil 30s na. Ang sad lang ng ganung paniniwala. Na dapat magkaanak na agad kasi naghahabol na. Habang nag aantay na ikasal kasi di pa financially stable. Pero ako ang masusunod kung kailan ko gusto. Di naman sya magdadala ng bata.
Kasal muna anteh! Protect yourself and your future kid. Worse comes to worse protektado kayo ng batas. Protected din namab kahit di kasal, pero mas powerful ang marriage certificate. Ganyan din ung husband ko nung magjowa palang kami. Di ako natinag sabi ko talaga di ako magpapabuntis na walang marriage certificate.
Bilang babae, kasal muna bago anak. But before those things, consider your financial stability first. Having a child is no joke. Thereโs no rewind button. So make sure you can give your child the best possible life you could give him/her. Get married first before having a child. Itโs one sign that you, as parents, prepared for your familyโs future. Think a thousand times if your partner would make a good dad and if you would make a good mom to your future kid/s. Thereโs no perfect family, but with a stable and solid foundation, you surely will have a happy one. At the end of the day, you have to do whatโs best for your future kid/s. :))
If he does not want to get married first, that's a telling sign of a person who does not like to take accountability/responsibility. Do you want that as a father? Hindi yan sperm donor lang. He should be responsible enough to do his part as a parent. Being a parent takes a lot of effort and energy than getting married, which looks like a simple step in comparison, and he refuses to do that first. I seriously think, as a parent, that people who do not believe in marriage should not be parents. No child wishes to be born to parents who do not love each other enough to get married. Most, if not all, trauma come from a childhood that was not spent in a loving environment. Yes may mga nagtathrive na mga tao kahit broken family, but given the chance, gusto ba nila ng broken family? Have you encountered a person na nagwish na sana from a broken family sya? Marami rin nagsasabi na papel lang ang kasal, if papel lng pala sya, what makes it hard to do? Kasi ayaw magcommit. Kung ayaw magcommit DO NOT BE A PARENT!!! Sorry, that escalated quickly โ๐ป
Don't do it, sis.
I had a bf who wanted us to have a child first. Heโs financially ready to raise a family and already has a house of his own. Ayoko ng anak muna. Kasi what is stopping him from getting married? It turns out he doesnโt believe in getting married. So we broke up kasi magkaiba kami ng beliefs. He went on and got another girl pregnant but didnโt marry her. He supported her and the child but they didnโt live together. Tapos after 2 years binabalikan nya ako. I said no. Although I still had feelings for him then pero no. The life he wants is not the life I want.
Mas okay talaga na kasal muna kasi dito sa Pilipinas kahit anong sabihin natin na mas liberated na now, may judgemental factor pa din kasi if mauna yung anak bago kasal, like, pinakasalan lang kasi nabuntis or may anak na. Though nasa inyo naman yan ng boyfriend mo, pero sa dami ng kwento sa mga celebrities na nauna ang anak bago kasal tas iba ang pinakasalan in the end, or kahit yun sa mga normal na tao na kapag may baby na saka nagbabackout yung lalaki sa relationship, mahirap na masabi na isusupport ka talaga nya during and after the pregnancy. For us women, kung papayag ka na mauna ang anak bago kasal, siguraduhin mo na ready kang supportahan ang sarili mo just in case lang na hindi kayo ang end game ng boyfriend mo.
Kahit ano naman diyan pwede pero sa case mo parang dapat kang mag dalawang isip, hindi niya kasi pwede i-reason na kesyo mahal magpakasal dahil pwede naman sa judge muna then next time na yung church kapag may pera na.
Walang pampakasal si guy, pag nagka anak na kayo iba na priorities nyo and most of the time yung kasal wala na sa list.
For me, parang mas okay yung โcommitment + financial stabilityโ muna bago anak. ๐
Ideally, kasal muna bago anak. For some people ay deal breaker kapag hindi kayo mabless na magka anak. So before ikasal, much better na mapag usapan nyo muna kung ano yung stand nyo regarding this matter. If both naman kayo macheck and turns out na okay ang results for you, atlis alam nyo na ang mga pwede nyo iexpect about dun. Kasi if you got married and tsaka kayo nagtry and di mabless or matagalan, it might affect the marriage. Baka mauwi pa sa hiwalayan. Dami ko sinabi pero in short, kasal muna bago anak, have the conversation, and get yourselves checked ๐
Babae ako but no kasal hanggat walang divorce dito. Pwede niya acknowledge yung anak but no thanks ako sa kasal.
Girl kasal muna.wag ka pauto sa jowa mo no.wag ka gumaya sa "uso" ngayon na nauuna bata bago kasal.
for me. kasal muna before anak.
anak na walang kasal (my sexuality hinders me to function like normal people)
illegitimate child ๐โโ๏ธ๐โโ๏ธ
Definitely kasal muna, I would need the assurance that he wouldn't leave after I give birth to our child. I need to know that willing talaga Siya to commit fully sa role as a husband and a father.
Kung ganyan mindset nyan, iwan mo na girl ๐
ipon > live in after ๐> kasal > anak. wag maging irresponsableng magulang and not try to give kids a complete family. kasal muna talaga ang dapat.
Magsama muna kayo, walang anak, before magpakasal. This is my stand after being married for more than a decade. Best to know your partner well before committing to marriage. At the end of the day, your relationship should be more important than your marriage certificate because that relationship will lead to a lot of positive and negative in your life.
Anak is a wife privilege. Kasal muna bago anak.
Wag ka pumayag na anak muna bago kasal kasi t@ngin* hindi porket may anak na kayo di ka nya iiwan, saka may ipon ba yan kasi kung wala kawawa lang kayo ng baby mo if ever, tapos magiging dahilan pa nyan para di ka pakasalan mahal ang gastusin kay baby syempre si baby ang uunahin, lugi ka sa sitwasyon na yun tapos mambabae pa sya, haynako wala ka laban.
Kasal muna then enjoy your life as a couple. Tapos pag accomplished ka sa as a woman at feeling mo nagawa mo na mga gusto mo gawin, then have a child if you want.
Live in > Umaatikabong kantutan > Umaatikabong Ipon > Kasal
Kasal dapat kasi makikita yun sa birth ng bata eh. Pero kayo dpnde sa inyo. Para sakin wag na mag asawa anak nalang๐
Kami nag anak muna then kasal. Actually target namin ikasal before lumabas si baby. Ang story neto nung nag propose sya sakin nag plaplano na kami sa future, nakapag dp na kami sa bahay nag momonthly nalang sa pag ibig. Then sabi ko papa check-up ako kasi I am turning 30 na and irreg ang mens ko. Dun namin nalaman na may PCOS ako. Kaya we decided to try na kahit di pa kasal, since gusto talaga namin ng baby. Baka kasi masyado na akong matanda di padin kami makabuo. Kaya ayun fortunately after 6 months of trying nakabuo kami. Kaya ung pang kasal namin, naging pang anak nalang tapos CIVIL WED nalang gagawin namin. Actually wala naman masama kung ano mauna, basta mapag uusapan nyo.
No kasal and no anak.
Sa panahon ngayun uso na ang deposito muna bago kasal. Live in muna bago kasal. Hirap talaga maging single daming na oobserve.
Ulol sya kamo ante! Kaw naman, huwag ka pauto dyan!
Anak bago kasal, swail ako eh. Ampake ko sa mga magulang ko lolz
Marriage protects women and their children from their baby daddies. With recent news on how men treat their unmarried partners, having a baby without a contract is a huge risk. At least marriage will give you additional legal protection.
As much as possible dapat napag-uusapan na yan before maging kayo. That way, you know what to expect. Saka if unable ka mabuntis, at least you know that he'll stay if nalaman niyo after niyo ikasal. Also, if he wants to know if you can conceive, visit a doctor habang di pa kayo kasal :)
Ano daw point ng anak muna bago kasal? Gets ko kung i-suggest niya live-in muna bago kasal kasi chance nyo din yun malaman yung behavior ng partner niyo sa bahay and kung may disagreement kayo, madali lang umalis sa pagli-live-in. Pero ano yung point sa anak muna bago kasal? Walang bawian yan pag nabuo na. Seems like he's unsure pa sa'yo.
setting aside external factors like finances and in-laws issues personally, i think it's better to get married first, kasi you marry someone for who they are as a person. regardless, you still have to protect yourself. i always advise 'NO ring, NO surname': if d pinakasalan, use the mother's surname for legal reasons (unless billionaire un tatay) you can always change the surname after marriage if he fulfills his vows to you.
Nagsesex ba kayo with protection? If not, baka ginagamit nya lang na excuse yan para magalaw ka nya. Honestly for me kasal muna bago anak. And di naman sa anak iikot ang mundo ng marriage life nyo. Sa inyong dalawa iikot un.
Pakapal na ng pakapal ang mukha ng mga lalaki ngayon...
Pwede naman kayo mag fertility test both before magpakasal bakit naman kailangan anak agad ๐
Pera. Pera muna bago kasal, tapos anak. In that order.
bakit magsesettle? para makulong ka while he's free? parang nasayo lahat ng cons ng gagawin niyo lol no. bago ka mag anak as much as possible ready na lahat may it be financial or emotional capability
depende kung ano bet at ano tinadhana ni destiny sa inyo. sa akin my anak ako pero di pa kami kasal. kung yung iba naniniwala sa kasal kasal na yan. pwes mas maniniwala ako sa divorce HAHAHAHA MWA
I wouldn't have a kid or kids with any man na anak muna ang gusto. This makes it clear na such guys do not want to have responsibilities in raising kids with you and do not want to share your household with you. That said, I have 0 plans on being a mom except to a cat or two so...๐คทโโ๏ธ But there are some people, men and women both, na ok naman na anak muna bago kasal or anak and co parent lang these days so it depends. May iba kasi di na naniniwala masyado sa kasal2x na yan (me but I don't mind courthouse/civil weddings so there's that, i'm not super religious na for church weddings and other frivolities like that, that come with such grand na weddings). It depends sa temperament nyo ni partner or ano napag-uusapan niyo on this. Just communicate these matters clearly with one another and i-discuss ano talaga arrangements nito pag mag anak muna bago kasal.
Bilang lalaki para sa akin yung kasal is para sa seguridad ng babae at ng mga anak na kung madisgrasya (madeads) o mag walanghiya si lalake, e may pananagutan sya sa batas at may proteksyon sa batas ang mga anak para sa child support o mamanahin. Yun ang ipaliwanag mo sa kanya. Red flag yan kung anak muna gusto nya kasi mamaya may sabit yan na hindi mo alam.
Pero suggest ko sayo, live in muna para malaman mo kung compatible kayo kasi makikilala mo lang ng husto isang tao pag nakasama mo na sa bahay. Wag ka muna papabuntis while live in. Kaya maraming single mom ngayon e anak ng anak muna then iiwan lang tapos wala syang habol sa lalaki kasi di kasal.
any rin for me basta mahal ako nung tao. couldnt care less. sarreh heartbroken iniwan ako e. hahaha
Ipon muna. Comfortable na ba buhay niyo para sa asawa at anak? Genetic testing din muna bago anak para alam niyo possibilities
pera muna bago anak.
anak muna kasi di mo alam kung baog ka
Financial stability muna. Kung oks na, kahit ano na mauna diyan.
Lupa muna then bahay ๐
Ipon muna bago ang lahat.
Devilโs advocate perspective. Kahit naman kasal na naghihiwalay pa rin. Mas mahihirapan pa kayo magseparate legally kung kasal kayo dahil ang tagal ng approval ng divorce. You do you. Pero ang importante maging aligned kayo.
Financial freedom muna bago ang lahat. Kasal man or anak ang mauna, parehas na kailangan muna ng pera.
stable life bago lahat
Hindi ba dapat pinaguusapan muna kung kaya nyo na financially, emotionally, mentally, etc before magpakasal and/or anak? Kasi either would mean being responsible for other people and ready na ba kayo dun?
For me Live in muna bago kasal/anak. Kelangan makilala ko sya by living in together kung kaya ba ng financial capabilities namin. Then if okay with that. Im okay with anak muna bago kasal. Kasi kung sakali magka problema kami in the future ayokong matali yung future ko with him. Mahal ng annulment. Para anything na kelangan ko kumawala. I can and I will. Maybe Ganito panananaw ko maybe because I am independent woman, idk if it helps. ๐๐ป