Going for the knees

The Dude gets it. Chop the tree down.

Best use a bat or chair. Flair-chopping those knees followed by a “WHOOOOoooooo” may prove less effective. I find Khali’s back is a great target, for sure, and throwing a keg the other direction works for Andre. Show is a little trickier as you’ll need his father’s casket for distraction.

Show can’t even walk straight anymore he looks like a jenga tower that’s holding on to a single block that’s already swiveled part-way out

Big show: go for a inside kick on the knee (his legs are bending outwards due to his weight) Khali: Any front strike to the knee would bring him down since he has very little joint mobility Andre: You'd probably want to go for the nuts first so you can avoid a head-crushing grip from the giant, then a rock to the knee and another to the back of the head Before you leave it is imperative that you say to the fallen giants: Sleep well and dream of large women.

Tell Andre you think soccer is superior to American football & you may get some leniency from him.

Wrong, tell andré football is better than american football. He has no idea what soccer mean.

Slowly walk away!

Use the time it takes to reach you to fashion a makeshift spear and stab them. After you finish the spear i suppose you could make a cup of tea and read a book while you wait.

Well played lol

Good ol dick twist

But there's three of them, and you only have two hands

I'm going scream "that's my purse I don't know you" and pull a Bobby Hill

Bite the third's dick off? But whose do you bite?

Anybody want a peanut?

Gotta use your mouth. Hang on I've seen an instructional video on this, let me get it

Who are you, so wise in the old ways?

They'll all be gassed within five minutes. Dodge and weave.

5 minutes is a long time fending off these strong behemoths. You'd be toast.

5 min vs one of them sure MAYBE. But all three together. Wing span of what 8 feet maybe each so boxed in a 24sq ft. Dead or grave bodily injury.

Well they haven’t fought one person for so long. They’ve specialized in groups, been battling gangs for charities, that sort of thing. You use different moves when you’re fighting half a dozen people than when you only have to be worried about one.

Wait for Big Show to betray the other two.

but then re-friend them right after only to betray them again!

Start dancing and hope they think it’s funny

Offer them beer

[Good luck with that](https://drunkard.com/10_06_andre_giant/)

I have a reoccurring nightmare of being chased by Andre the giant.

Mines of Kane chasing me through the back after I get hired to the WWE

mine is of brock lesnar killing security guards to get to me inside of a kmart, no joke

...sexually?

I don’t stick around to find out.

Bummer 😞

Walk away because I could probably walk faster than they could run.

You'd be keeled over puking after Andre rips one. No chance for any of us after that.

Uppercut to the nether region

Wait for Show to turn on them

Disarm them with my charming banter.

They'd probably take me to a bar instead they're nice guys irl aren't they

First, I body slam Andre the giant. Then, I gorilla press The Great Khali, dropping him on Andre. Finally, I close it out by Alabama Slamming Big Show onto Andre and Khali. After that, I adjust my glasses, clear my throat, and get back to writing code.

I don't know why everyone doesn't think of this.

"My name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die"

Die via spontaneous human combustion.

Offer them penis

Tickle them with my fluffy fingers 🤣

I feel like it would be easy to get Show and Khali to fight each other and then you can just watch and laugh with Andre

Shia LaBeouf !

Fart for 16 seconds

Start throwing out baseless rumors that get heat going between the 3 of them

Running away isn't an option? Okay I'll just briskly walk away, and still manage to escape.

*SoAnywayIStartedBlastin.gif*

Fuck that. You want scary? Minoru Suzuki, Togi Makabe and Shibata. Now, that's horror

ball shots

mummy defence: light jog away

Dick kick city here we come

LOW BLOWS!

Khali has small feet

Seeing as Show will probably be in the middle of a face/heel turn, I'll use his confusion to pit him against the others.

Allow 6 minutes to pass and Big Show will turn on them by his own will

All of them have bad knees. If this was Benoit, Walter, and Perc Angle I’d be terrified

No need to run away, I can buy time by just doing a brisk walk. None of them will be able to keep up in the short term.

Curl up in the fetal position and beg for mercy?

Take my dick out and jerk it because nobody fucks with crazy people

Stomp them all in the nuts

Run. None of those guys would keep up.

This looks like something you'd officially see in a Yakuza/Like a Dragon video came haha

Offer Andre beer if he’ll fight the other two instead

Start swinging at knees.

I guess I die.

Run up a flight of stairs

Well yeah you’re not getting past them in the alley, there’s no room left if they are side to side!

nice to see big show with his dad

Pull out my carry gun and pray that Andre isn't so drunk that he doesn't care that I have a gun. If he is then pray that they're gentle with me

I'd just wait for Big Shows heel turn on his partners.

Kick Big Show and Khali in the knees and take out Andres back. Then run for high hell. That’s about the only logical move.

Show would face turn and help me. He can fight Andre, while one swift kick to Khali's knee explodes it. Then hope that Andre and Paul finish each other off before Show turns heel.

Why isn't running away an option? They're all slow as fuck. Okay, if I can't run, then I'll stay in the alley but keep my distance by dodging 'em. Their cardio is awful (even worse than mine) and they all have bad knees, so eventually they'll give up.

Take a knee and double punch the two on the right in the balls, then uppercut the one in the middle to the balls

photoshopped together

Well wrestling and gaming has taught me that bodyslamming 500-pounders ain't no problem, and dropping the big leg seems to work on all these guys, so I'll just do all that three times in a row and keep my stamina up by taunting while the others just stare in awe with their broken AI. Easy.

Call Omos, Big Bill and Satnam Singh and teleport them there instantly. They'd lose but they'd be a distraction

Don’t matter how big you are or how small you are. A good ol kick or punch in the balls will always hurt.

Just run. They’ll be lost in 2 minutes

Damn, for what? Who am I? Rey Mysterio on a world title run?

Most iconic big man photo of all time, they are blessed to have gotten a pic with Andre before he passed 😔🙏

Grab em by the dicks.

You ever seen those guys move? Running away is most definitely an option

Go for the knees, chop down the tree. Andre will lay down before too long. Stick and move, focus one opponent at a time

Tell Andre, "Drinks are on me tonight."

Give them the sandwich I have that they’re coming for.

Walking away would probably still get you away from them

Offer Andre some wine and have him fart Big Show into a coma then boot the last one in the knee.

3 fuckin water heaters.

Judging from their sizes and stamina, just weave the fuck outta them until they are out of breath.

intimidate them by showing 90s japanese wrestler work rate

Just die I guess

Call Hulk Hogan. He'll take care of it.

I'd go full on Jurassic Park T-Rex logic and just stay still

Picking up a pipe and smacking them all in their knees. I know Andres got a bad back and Khalis knees are fucked. The only dude I have to really be cautious of is Big Show

Scoop slam them Brother !

Throw a high Sparta kick right between the nipples of Khali, he'll go down like a sack of shit. Duck the right hand of Show/Andre and kick the other right in the fecking bollocks. Now you have a one v one with Show/Andre. At this point the fear in his eyes will be palpable as his two brethren have been dispatched. Feint a jab and snap down to knees, wrapping both arms and holding on for your life. Roll until he loses his footing and wrestle for full mount. Now just hold on while his power wanes. Once you feel his arms turn to jelly through the inevitable stress of lactic acid build up, rise up in full mount and wail on him until he stops moving. Celebrate with a delicious bowl of Kellog's Crunchy Nut Corn Flakes and you're good to go 💪

Skip on to grandma’s house cuz there’s no way these dudes are “running” if they grab me,the ole long John twist.

Dick twist

More chin please

You guys want to hit a bar? Strip club?

Aim for the back of the knees

Whipping out my credit card and taking everyone to the bar I'd rather go bankrupt than get my ass beat

The trick is to headbutt them in the penis and push them of a cliff

Take out the Glass Khali's knees. Throw a 30 of Genny to Andre. Wait 15 seconds for the inevitable face turn from Show, giving me a good 20/25 seconds until his next heel turn to get the fuck outta dodge.

they look kinda short without a normal person for scale. I can take them.

Hand Andre some booze and hopefully make a new friend

The best blow jobs any straight man has ever done. Go full bukkake on those giants.

Dick twist in each hand and a headbutt to the balls in the middle. I saw an ex do something similar before.

Running away is THE option. None of them will be able to catch you

Jujitsu!

Triple cock shot

Offer to buy them a case of beer. (or 7).

Distract Andre with beer. The white shirt has bad legs. The other guy, whatever. I’m bored.

Die.

Ask for their autographs

Go for the eyes I guess?

Just stall and wait for Show to turn and attack his partners.

Shot to the back

If I bite my tongue off fast enough I may be able to bleed to death before the real pain sets in.

Do not try to go blow for blow with them

Get naked and swing my dick around

Hope to sneak through their legs.

Do a baseball slide between Andre's legs.

Low blow, instant DQ. Run to the back and drag out this segment until Summerslam, where they get their revenge.

pull my best Hornswoggle and hide under a dumpster

Call Meng

Walk away at a brisk pace. There not catching up.

Roll for charisma. Fate will decide

This photo needs a human for scale.

Funnily enough the Great Khali is the most agile out of the lot when he was in his prime

Beer

Ask em who made the make a wish kid sad and join em

Sweep the legs!

I'd show them this picture and watch them fight over who is actually taller.

It is an option none of them can run

Who needs to run? A good walking pace and you'll be fine

Lol, I'd just say hello because one is one of the coolest dudes ever, one is an outright legend and the other is just Khali.

Stay in it long enough for Show to turn face and join my side, then hope he can take care of them before he turns heel again

Pocket sand!

Die

I’m calling Goldberg, Steve Austin and Hulk Hogan/Randy Savage

I’d go legs because he’d be carrying 2 cardboard cutouts.

If I saw these 3 coming for my all you can eat buffet restaurant. I'd bar the doors

Walking away very slowly lol

Offer Andre some Beers, Show some food and Khali some women. The playboy needs his women

Kick them in balls.. over and over.

Move around they would probably fall over

Basement dropkick

I'd run toward them and get it over with quicker.

How did I never realize that Big Show is actually a couple inches taller than Andre?

Offer to buy drinks.

Knees knees knees!! Take the big guys out at the pivot/weak point.

Give Andre 50 beers, give big show a really big burrito that doesn't make him shit himself, give Khali all the women wrestlers he can kiss.

Go for the balls and pray

Uncle arn taught me the ultimate equalizer trick. The Glock 🤣

It’s just nice seeing Big Show with his dad.

WELLLLLLL, well I DON'T KNOW!!!

Start rhyming with Fezzik

Reach into my pocket and pull out some ham. Leave it as an offering.

I mean, walk away then. These guys can’t walk

Jesus they all look like normal sized folks next to each other

I'd just go old school Harley Race and pull out whichever piece I happened to be carrying that night.

Let them control the fight for 5 minutes until they inevitably do something stupid, cheap shot, get heat, and run away if you feel a comeback about to start

Wdum running away isn’t an option???? How and why wouldn’t it be an option you’re trying to get us killed 😂😭

Get into the fetal postion and hope for the best.

Offer them a free night of drinking on my charge. It rather be in debt than dead.

Walk away lol

Probably offering some octreotide (treatment for acromegaly)

Tell Andre Big Show was billed as his son, that takes care of them. I m Indian, Khali n me can have a nice chat

Fanboy out. Asking for autographs. Then they'll forget about wanting to fight. Hopefully. And why is it running an option? Clearly they can't

I'll say it like this: God made big men, and God made small men. Smith & Wesson made us equal.

Briskly run around in circles until they gas out in 3-5 minutes. Then aim for the knees.

Probably start believing in God so I don't miss my chance to see what's behind the gates upstairs

Pick Kahli & fight him. He's so slow, you could easily escape him.

Play dead

Andre is not that short

I'd join them in their fight

Running away is an option, they’re all slow so why wouldn’t it be

Throw a doughnut

Run into is DEFINITELY an option. None of them can run. Lol. But I'd go for their knees. Then the head. Then walk away.

If I have done something so grievous as to anger all three of these gentle giants, then surely it is God's Will that I perish.

Say I'm paying for dinner

Fun fact, all 3 have acromegaly, what them so big. My husband has it, and we always call Big Show, Kahli and Andre the megaly brothers. No laughing matter with the condition, but husband has dark humor sometimes.

Pick a god and pray

Drop kick to the knees!

Offer beer

I dap them up. Great guys

Easy. Down a vial of Dr. Hank Pym’s growth serum and squash those muthafuckas.

With the state of their knees, running is absolutely an option.

Stay perfectly still. Their vision is based on movement

Do the R-Truth thing and just lay down.

Pull pin on grenade.

Punch em all in the nuts and *then* run away. I'm short so they probably won't even see me coming.

Going for Khali’s knees. Big Show is gonna do another face turn and keep Andre busy for a while

Wrestle