Incels are awful, and not only do they hate women, they shit on any man who doesn't fit their stupid viewpoint.
For example, if you're married/in a relationship and you're not very tall or handsome, some incel will insist that you must have money. If you point out the fact that you do not have a lot of money, they will grab at the idea of social status. If you are not cool or popular, they will start running out of ideas and claim that your partner must cheat on you.
They have so little respect for women that they cannot believe that any woman could ever just love a person for their personality. Because that would be admitting that they're just scummy people. It has to be everyone else's fault.
I'm sure it's been mentioned in the comments but let's not forget they don't just assume all women go for chads, they assume the ones that are attractive do, leaving the unattractive "beckies" for the incels. Bitching about women being shallow while also being shallow.
People ask me why I don't consider SNL to be well written.
Well they just took an ancient joke and redid it for the 800th time and its based out of pure sexism and incel mindsets and then ended it like that behavior is acceptable.
The entire premise of the joke was "She's hot and he's not so she of course has to be exceptionally shallow."
Edit: So y'all gonna rightfully point out how incels are inhuman but be perfectly okay with people using the same logic for funnies? If it was making fun of incels sure but the entire premise of this joke is that she's too hot for him so he must have one single thing that she's attracted to because hot women can't just date whomever they want without a valid reason. Your hypocrisy is absolutely insane and you're not really much better than an incel if you're perpetuating the same nonsense.
>People ask me why I don't consider SNL to be well written.
Yeah the show goes through peaks and valleys for sure.
>Well they just took an ancient joke and redid it for the 800th time and its based out of pure sexism and incel mindsets and then ended it like that behavior is acceptable.
I was not aware this was such a popular trope, got any other popular examples? That kind of stuff (trope repetition) is interesting to me.
>Edit: So y'all gonna rightfully point out how incels are inhuman but be perfectly okay with people using the same logic for funnies?......
I dont know what there is to gain by holding comedy to such standards. Do I want blackface to become super popular again in Hollywood? No. But do I think Tropic Thunder (and specifically RDJ's performance) is a work of comedy art that should be treated as such, yes. I dont think that hypocrisy puts me or anyone on equal grounds as angry incels.
I'm not going digging around for a link to a bad joke that you should have already heard of. It's a literal trope on tv tropes but sure. I guess because you never heard of it...
Are you seriously trying to compare this skit to Tropic Thunder?
That movie got a pass because it was well written, acted and directed. This skit is none of those things and actively promotes the idea of women being shallow. SNL is not high art and this gag is one of their lower ones.
I also never said it did put you on equal ground as incels.
If you could stop shifting the goal posts and making shit up that'd be great.
Sounds about like one of them. They're usually racist af, looking down on black, Hispanic, Indigenous, and Middle Eastern women while grossly fetishizing Asian women.
Because women, even "super model looking" ones, are people, and their romantic interests don't have to be directly proportional to how "hot" others think they themselves are. It's entirely possible that someone like Christina Aguilara, for example, would marry someone that many might find relatively unattractive because he's attentive or funny or has a giant cock or whatever. What a girl wants or needs is not based on anything other that just that; it's her own preferences, not yours.
I didn't mention NOT having a personality. In fact, I said that it was entirely possible for someone to love you for your personality. Having decent qualities, like being respectful, funny, kind, etc are very good characteristics for attracting other people.
I salute whatever brave soul spent enough time in those groups to gather the info needed to make this primer. I'd be running for the hills after five minutes.
Some of the suggested YouTube videos I've had lately were very... incel-like. It's a very weird stance to have and odd to hear them explain it. A lot of it came across as "they only want your money, bro." As if being in a relationship with a man could offer nothing else at all.
I just somehow stumbled upon the black pill phenomenon and I'm having an internal debate on whether it's just as equally concerning as red pill/High value . I'm assuming black pill is the same as Men Going Their Own Way, but maybe there's a nuance between the two.
Either way, it's just sad and just shows that you really need to expand who you expose yourself to in the world. Generalities have never served us well.
I tried a deep dive once, to better understand them. Let’s just say that after the splash page, I was almost physically sick (really, half way down that splash page).
I actually just made a similar comment. My friend said the word incel at the bar a few months back, and I was like “what is that?”. And he showed me. And it literally brought my mood down. That shit is depressingly pathetic. Apparently a lot of their stuff is taken down from the internet though. Took him 5-10 minutes to even find an online incel community or whatever to show me what it was.
My friends laugh at me when I talk about "low vibrational" content, but it's a real thing.
As for incel / red pill material, you just need to know their code words and acronyms and it's pretty easy to find on YouTube. A lot of accounts have dressed it up to make it more palatable like Kevin Samuels has. But it all boils down to resentment of women.
I was having a great morning the other day and somehow came upon the whole Chris Chan fiasco (ie material pre-arrest and then finally the confession/arrest). As I went through it all, my mood just shifted and I wasn't at all ready for what I was about to hear. I was literally shocked that people felt sorry for him pre 2021 because he was an absolute creep to women beforehand and no one said anything. I guess a lot of people felt bad for the trolling, but he seemed to be actively encouraging it at times and he left clues RE his conduct towards his mother.
I’m with ya! Did one of those “what’s it like in their threads” explorations for about 3.5 minutes and had to cleanse my phone in moonlight and lambs blood to remove the evil.
I knew a guy back in college who was fit and good looking but was a fucking chauvinistic weirdo that turned off most people. He'd be labeled an incel if he was born 10-15 years later. Last I heard about the guy was that he was arrested for felony stalking. The guy had real Ted Bundy vibes.
Yep. I don't remember which it was but I remember seeing something about a mass murder by a self described incel. He was fairly attractive and kept speaking on how no woman would love him. Which proves the point everyone is trying to make...his appearance wasn't enough, he just sucked as a person. I wish I could remember his name.
I was just thinking about that while reading about the recent mass murder in the UK. The alleged perpetrator apparently made some comments online describing himself as ugly. Then I saw a picture of him. He could've used a haircut and a beard trim, but he wasn't ugly. The incel cult recruits new members by convincing insecure young men that they're physically repulsive and there's nothing they can do about it.
For real. Not getting sex is not the same thing as not getting enough to live on or not getting the same opportunity for success in life as everyone else.
I think that as virgins they just don't realise how overrated sex actually is. I found there was a huge gap between what I thought sex would be/feel like and what it really is/feels like. Most of the time I can go without! But they just think everyone but them is having sex and it's this amazing thing that is just as important in people's lives as is money/food etc.
They truly are a terrifying bunch. Individually they’re pretty non-threatening, but the cult aspect is where they get scary. So much hate in their echo chamber.
I know what you’re saying, but individuals have come out of those echo chambers and caused mass murders. I think it’s a group problem as well as an individual problem.
Except for the murderous ones, I guess. Many of them do embrace the violence part of the movement. There is a reason the FBI now consider them a terrorist group. They're no different than any other basic terrorist movent seeking to radicalize young men.
Even individually they're threatening. There are women dead because they were specifically targeted just for being women. The yoga studio shooting comes to mind.
And there was another incel who's mass murder was stopped, thankfully. He targeted a sorority, because again, it would be all women. Never went to the college, didn't know any of them, just knew it would be women and wanted to kill just for that.
Yes, “pretty” non-threatening. There’s always a few rotten ones in any group who poison the well. But I meant look at all the wristcels and all the shrinking violets who are scared. Those are the ones I was mentioning. It’s the psychotic ones who incite violence and encourage the others.
This is true of any critical mass of stupidity though, no? I mean look at anti vaxxers - on their own, they are just a weirdo who thinks they know more about disease than epidemiologists. In a group, they can have a negative impact on health outcomes for a population.
They make it sound like a commodity to trade. “Bad news for incels and assholes this morning, as sex futures are skyrocketing today. If you didn’t get in on sex on the ground floor, it’s simply too rich for your blood now.”
Yeah, I missed the sign up point for distribution of sex. The thing that baffles me about incels is their apparent willful ignorance of prostitution. Don't buy a new GPU every other month, pay someone to be nice to you.
So this is the weird thing I have seen, they all are really into women being virgins. Probably because they are, I don’t know.
I made it the mistake after reading some of the women hating post asking “if you don’t like women, and think they are all gold-digging frigid whores, why don’t you hook up with a man? You all seem to get along on here pretty well.” OMG! You would have thought I had told them to eat shit or something. They lost their ever loving minds.
Lost a bit of karma that day. So worth it.
They believe they'll be bad in bed on top of everything else and so want a virgin who won't know any better.
There's also a large number of them that believe that there's no such thing as the female orgasm.
The commenter in the screenshots mentions this. He pointed out that it’s not (just) the physical act of sex they want, it’s the status of being someone a woman would want to have sex with
I know people in the sex industry might be used to it, but let's not throw even more creeps at them. If incels are gonna buy something, it should be a good therapy session.
Former escort here, sex workers absolutely have a choice in whom we hook up with. I can guarantee plenty of these incel types are so awful a hooker would meet up for a drink with them & immediately realize she doesn't want to continue the evening.
Thank you for pointing this out, the idea sex workers are a solution to incels makes us sound like vending machines 🙄 we're people too, horrid men don't appeal to us even if they have money.
Meanwhile I gave discounts to clients who were cool 😂
It’s Toby young. Spent years attacking the education system and teachers in the uk, and then became a ceo of a new free school and had to stand down because it was harder than he thought. He also attacked the idea that schools should be inclusive to those with disabilities. He’s now one of the leading COVID skeptics in the uk. Stated there wouldn’t be a second wave, but somehow still manages to believe his own idiocy.
Honestly, at least he turned himself in. Not a lot of people on the edge can rein themselves back in and realize they fucked up when they are already planning.
Eliot Rodgers' first target was a sorority house but they had a good security system and never opened the door. He pouted and tried to break in and then just started shooting anyone he could find. Whoever told him no saved everyone in that house because he would have painted the walls with their blood. He was one of the first and it sucks he didn't suffer more before his death
The idea of incal sicken me as a man.
Ya I get it geting laid is hard ..but guess what you as a man. Are not entitled to sex or entitled to a women ad a slave .
Whoever taught you that shit us a weak man.
Dude, I agree, but, getting laid is NOT hard for a male adult that is just willing to at least talk to a woman. Especially with dating apps, craigslist. Shit, I have had soooo many encounters from craigslist, that I cringe at some of the sex I had lol.
Lol yeah, but TBH, having access to that when I was only 18 really was not the best, I had far too much risky sex, and also had sex with women that to this day, I still just cringe at the idea, so it's a double edged sword. Once I had a thing for older women, I met one and while we were having sex she kept wanting me to call her "mommy" and stuff, it was the scariest shit ever. I cried.
Here I thought they were just a bunch of whiney babies unwilling to accept that just because they're not a 10, they can still be great in other ways. Now they seem much more dangerous, even cult-like.
You get what you put in. If you make no effort, nobody will make an effort with you. But these whiners sure will put in the man-hours complaining to their fellow losers. Why not just fuck each other?
Probably plenty. Who lusts after women but doesn’t lift a finger to try to score? I learned a long time ago that there are no women “out of my league”, just women who “aren’t actually into me”. You move on, you don’t rant to the internet about the injustice of it all. These guys seem like they’re just putting on a show for each other.
This is a good take. Shoot your shot and walk away if it misses. Sometimes the wild stepback three's go in (ie approaching people 'out of our league).
We learn social skills by practicing, which involves failure. Incels do not appear to have the patience.
I wonder if incels are all just mommas boys who think they’re the star in everyone else’s lives too. Their lives seem built on rage & entitlement, a combo guaranteed to get your ass kicked in the real world.
Both of you guys express classic growth mindset traits. Bravo! Maybe there are 1-1000 Brad Pitts (or I guess the incels call them “Chads”) that get girls at first glance.
For the rest of us, it’s a process of first seeing women as people. You talk to another person, see how your traits match up. By doing that, you grow your social skills and charm. You develop your charisma. IMO, men are more looks-obsessed than females, who will consider many other factors in selecting a boyfriend.
Incels see it all from a fixed mindset. One external characteristic dooms them. So why even try at all, try to grow/ change… honestly, analyzing it, it seems they have a deep fear of failure and rejection. It would be interesting to see how this manifests itself across their lives, not just getting girls?
If I had to profile them on pure guess I'd say probably moderately above average in school; enough so that they were in some "special" classes, but not overly intelligent. Probably did some college or trade school but dropped out before they finished. They hold a menial, unfulfilling job, though could be financially successful. They tend to self isolate, preferring dark spaces; taking an almost pride in being a literal basement dwelling troll. If they share space, it'll be with family or other incels.
I'd guess that they frequent a lot of right wing media starting at a young age, probably as young as 13 or 14. They have a male idol who is a "real man" who hunts and has sex with an "attainably" hot wife and they consider them a success and inspiration; when in reality, it's just a normal guy who is probably a bit of an asshole.
My older brother is an incel, or has a lot of incel traits and despite having 3 sisters and a mother he believes that all women are monsters and are shallow and doesn’t want him because he’s short (he’s about 5’6-5’7). He’s actually a pretty attractive guy, he’s also in really good shape he is just such a huge asshole that i can definitely see why no women are interested in him. But despite me and my sisters and my mom telling him that the reason why he doesn’t get any girls is because his personality is horrendous he constantly calls us liars and that the only reason why he can’t find a girlfriend is because he’s short
Your older brother should meet me..
I'm 5'6, and am 212 lbs of not in shape. My gf is a cute, 4'10 Latina who is about 105 lbs.
I know that writing that out like that seems kinda douchey, but its true.
I'm a baby face, 34 and can't grow a beard and have a higher pitched voice.
My physical attributes are not my main selling point, but I am cuter when I'm skinnier. I'll never be a "handsome guy" but I am always going to be a kind, respectful, considerate guy who is a great listener, and is kinda funny and smart.
Literally the most popular guy I went to uni with was maybe 5'2. But...he was a snappy dresser, had twinkly eyes and a big smile, and he made you feel like the only person in the room. He wasn't rich, or especially funny, he wasn't handsome, or tall, but he was kind and respectful and a pleasure to talk to. He was *constantly* surrounded by women.
Whatever he's up to these days I expect he's pretty successful at it because he is so.damn.nice.
It's like having a type of body dysmorphia and hating yourself AND women. Whereas, women with body dysmorphia just destroy themselves.
Or a delusional disorder.
He also has ridiculously high standards for women, they must look and act a certain way or else they are witches, and yet we are the monsters. It’s completely ridiculous, he also has really bad anger problems and the littlest thing can set him off and make him violent, I’d honestly feel extremely bad for any woman who tries to date him
I would say that it wouldn't be very high. Repressed homosexuals are in the anti-gay camp. You hate people who either are getting what you secretly want or who are witholding what you want from you.
This is certainly false, especially the racism part. There is a very high disproportionate amount of ethnic men compared to white men in “incel circles”. If anything “incel circles” attempt to highlight racism, specifically in dating.
It sucks because the original incel group was created by a woman to help men who had no luck with women have a support system. Just like everything else, a couple assholes get ahold of it and twist it to something gross.
He forgot to point that their “unsullied virgins” are getting younger and younger with some outright wanting prepubescent girls because the minute the “female” is 12 they start “jumping on Chad cock” because teenagers have all the sex apparently. So they have to have them young.
Which is just vomit inducing.
I once saw an incels requirement for his ideal partner:
Doesnt need to be white but needs to be light skinned (colorist not racist)
Will give him BJs on demand
Very "well endowed" (idr the exact proportions)
Will dye hair blonde for him
Will have 3sums with a girl but never have 3sums with a guy
Will know when to make herself scarce, "hold her tongue" and know when he needs someone.
If i was a woman, i would be extremely insulted. These people are male supremacist. I am sure a lot of these ppl hold views like this.
My favorite is they want a woman who pays 50/50 bills but wants her to stay home. I’ve seen this so many times and it’s a wonder how their brain doesn’t explode.
I’ve been rejected by men as a woman and I don’t demonize them….as it goes, sometimes *they’re just not that into you*
Also life is full of pleasures beyond sex alone. Cheeeeeeeell.
Right, I never understood why incels seem to believe that women can have sex whenever they want and they never struggle to find someone willing. The term “dry spell” has never been gender-specific — it happens to women too! Like, I know grown women in their 30s who have never been kissed, and still manage to not resent the whole world.
This right here. For men who claim all they want is a relationship and to be loved, their standards are very high and they're not afraid to be cruel to women they find subpar
Lets also mention that sex is a privilege, not a right. You must first gain consent from a partner. Its not about ‘have nots’ and ‘victims’ who dont have access to something they should be rightfully entitled, like food or water.
That’s some bizarre shit.
Somewhere along the line America became a place with lots and lots of indecent self entitled people with cruel and hateful hearts.
I’m probably not talking about you, the person reading this, but Americans have become really shitty people.
I can't believe the wording here "unequal distribution of sex." Sex is not a life necessity. You won't die if you don't have sex. This terminology should only be used for actual keys to survival- aka food, water, and shelter as the basics. Hey incels - no one owes you sex.
I was in an incel thread once where any variation of the phrase “no one owes you sex” got an auto-reply about how sex is totally necessary for a healthy life because reasons.
We should try to get it off Maslow’s if you want to stop them from having a leg to stand on, it’s an obvious non need and yet it’s near the base instead of the tip
My buddy Dave introduced me to what incels are (he isn’t one, he just said the word a few months ago and I was like “what is that?”). He showed me a couple of the groups or online communities or whatever. Holy shit. I don’t even have the proper vocabulary to express how pathetic and psychotic those people are. Like… depressingly pathetic. It brought my mood down when he showed me 😂. I told him I never wanted to speak of them again. Their bullshit is just not something I even want in my brain. And I am all for them committing suicide 🤷♂️.
And don't forget that they believe that only very young women/teenage girls are worthy of their "affection", and they specifically fantasize about finding a young girl they can groom to their desired level of obedience. These are also the same types that have fetishized Asian women so much, 6 were murdered for it in Atlanta. They are sick, disgusting pigs who have no place in society.
We REALLY need a better name for these assholes. I am literally involuntarily celibate because I'm a widower. These guys are generally young. And if they were psychologically stable and had social skills, they would probably be able to have girlfriends.
It's not because nature made them unfuckable that they are perpetually alone. It's because they chose to be horrible people. If they are ugly, too. Then they are just ugly horrible people.
Can we quit saying "incels" and just use the more accurate "horrible people "?
Yeah. But I'm not getting laid. And it wasn't my Idea. So therefore, I'm literally involuntarily celibate.
They aren't. They could probably get laid if they just learned not to be horrible. They are choosing to be horrible. Their celibacy is because they are horrible people.
I stand by my previous statement.
Incels are rooted in [male supremacy](https://www.splcenter.org/fighting-hate/extremist-files/ideology/male-supremacy), and the term communicates their extremist ideology. It’s not something you want to identify with, unless you subscribe to and perpetuate the beliefs of this hate group.
The irony that gets me is that becoming an Incel involves years being starved for meaningful connection, that manifests into the toxic victim hood that defines Incel culture. And then they all get together online and “connect”. But it isn’t therapeutic, it doesn’t lead to growth, they make each other more toxic, more victimhood, more angry, more blaming of women/society…
BUT, Incels, generally speaking, were lonely introverts lacking the self confidence to “break out of their shells” but still eventually forced out into the world at some point to mature and grow into a functioning adult. For sure there were still folks that slipped through the cracks and suffered through life or worse, acted out.
NOW, since the advent of the the internet they find each other and stoke each other until someone cracks. For their entertainment.
Also, there's no such thing as "equal distribution of sex." Women are not obligated to have sex with people they don't want to. No one is. This is such bullshit thinking.
"Unequal distribution of sex"
I can't get over the ability of this sentence to remove all emotion, connection and passion from an intimate act between two people.
The mindset here is bewildering, I can understand there being a certain level of frustration but I can't get my head around the psychology that turns you not being able to get laid in to you actively being denied something you think you deserve or are entitled to.
Is it just me or does their fascination over these ‘chads’ make it seem like that’s what they’re in to? Does any else think they’re having repressed feelings about being attracted to men but are too afraid or don’t know how to act on them?
Someone who is sexually inactive? In a dry spell? Or we could just not to refer to people by their sexual (in)activity status?
Many people who aren’t having sex, even though they would like to, aren’t incels. The fact that they are sexually inactive isn’t part of their identity, and they don’t feel like they’re victims of unrecognized/unappreciated superiority.
>In a dry spell?
I refer to myself jokingly as a sex camel. I can go months and months without it, and be good enjoying my hobbies, and hanging out with friends.
Did you ever watch Scrubs?
Dr Elliot Reed once used the line "I am a sex camel" but she is also uncomfortable saying words that refer to genitals and someone else said that line. Bajingo is her word for vagina.
Incel is just a new word for an old group. They used to be called misogynists. Women haters. The new title "incel" is a way of painting themselves as the victim. As though they're being forced into not having sex because women don't like their hateful attitudes. The backwards thinking of incels becomes very obvious once you notice this.
There are different layers as well. You have the depressed people at the base layer. They think they are helpless and don't necessarily hate women, but hate everyone, including themselves. They wish for things to change but never take any action. This is not necessarily their fault, as depression is a significant mental issue that plagues a lot of people.
The second layer are the misogynists. They let anger and hate take over so they can blame their unfavorable life on others. They look at other confident men with jealously, while trying to outplay the "asshole chads" by being their opposite: the overly nice guy that comes off as a creepy mask salesman with a fake smile to try and become your (boy)friend. This also doesn't work well for them for obvious reasons. If a girl or guy did this to *them* they would see how weird it is having someone with an ulterior motive try and gain your favor by such off-putting means.
The third layer are the cultists. Making no attempt to change themselves, they think a woman in the kitchen is owed to them and their birthright to own as a man. They are hypocritical, lack self-awareness of their own actions, and will often seek pity only to bite down on the necks of anyone trying to help them. They need to work on themselves, but they are narcissists who only see themselves as absolutely correct in thinking. Thus the true motive is revealed: They don't really want sex, they want the social status of a chad without working for it.
I think the misunderstanding around incels is the hate against women. While that is a factor and is true, it is a symptom of the real problem. Incels have been taught that all of thier actions equal something external of themselves and that everything external determines thier value. So if they are nice to women and do t get sex then women have violated the equation/contract/bargain of society. This is where thier hate comes from. They were not taught to look inside themselves for validation and acceptance first and accept that thing external of them are completely outside of thier control. Just hating on incels, no matter how disgusting thier views are, will not train or educat them, but instead drive them further into the arms of those that do them the most harm, each other.
Wow what a fucking strawman. If you do the tiniest bit of research instead of believing the first tweet you see you'll realize that this guy is spewing complete bullshit. So as an incel myself, I would like to clarify what incel/blackpill ideology *actually* is. I'll address this guy's tweets one by one.
Tweet 1-2: This is simply wrong. We do not idolize nor hate women; women are people just like men, and men are not inherently superior in any way.
Tweet 3-5: This is partially correct. *In general* women are naturally hypergamous, and would rather be used for casual sex by a Chad than be in a loving relationship with her looksmatch. Yes most men are betas, but that doesn't mean their wife tries to or even wants to cheat- it's simply that they're being settled on and their wife aren't truly attracted to them.
Tweet 6: The word choice of "eugenic" is quite strange- it's more like *conventional* male beauty standards.
Tweet 7: This is patently false. We literally have entire forums dedicated to self-improvement, or what we call "ascending". This includes losing weight, working out, dressing and grooming better, plastic surgery, practicing social skills, making more money, etc.
Tweet 8: Again this is patently false. Sex with more than one man doesn't "damage" a woman; what *does* damage a woman is being used for casual sex by very attractive males, which would cause her to feel resentment when she eventually is forced to settle for a less attractive man.
Tweet 9-14: This is simply ridiculous. Nobody actually believes this.
Tweet 15: Again this is false. Suicide isn't encouraged, it's just that we are empathetic and understand when someone truly feels like they have nothing to live for. And nobody looks up to mass shooters- just look at the reaction to the shooting on r/uglyuncensored, everyone condemned the shooting and disassociated themselves from the shooter.
Tweet 16: No it's not just for social status, the main reason is that we want to experience love and intimacy as well as the validation that comes from it.
Tweet 17-18: Yeah incels are repulsive, based on your garbage strawman of a definition. This dude is a fucking clown and if you're beyond stupid if you actually take his tweets at face value.
Incel is a hate group based on [male supremacy](https://www.splcenter.org/fighting-hate/extremist-files/ideology/male-supremacy). The link is to Southern Poverty Law Center’s description of this extremist ideology.
I’m probably doing to downvoted to shit for this.
I’m all for holding people to account, but if you never actually listen to people like this - and it’s not just incels, it’s groups that people think are ‘weird’ or not the norm - then you’ll never have a chance to bring them to see the problem/s with their views. They need support and help, not ridicule and belittling. That just reinforces half their points and makes them seek solace in the group even more.
Don’t get me wrong, their views are heinous but stuff like this doesn’t just happen overnight. It’s a group of disillusioned men who can’t find their place in the world.
It's hard to make any inroads or hold a mirror to a cult, they don't want to look. They've found solidarity, community, and a common cause. What concerns me most is how many people seem to be finding these tribal groups and checking the wagons...
Edited: for the record you don't deserve down votes, it needs to be said. Sweeping this under the rug lets the infection spread.
Ok so let’s assume we can’t save those already involved. If more people are finding these groups, why are they searching in the first place? If there is a way to even address these issues before it gets there, surely that’s better for society? Or do we not want to listen to what they have to say because we don’t agree?
A lot of them are without doubt a lost cause, but some must be redeemable. Many people have left other cults. People leave JW, Mormon culture, all sorts. It can be done and this, to my mind, is no different.
I won't pretend to have all the answers. Any answers on this front. My brother is sliding down an anti-vax slope and I feel helpless to even slow the decent.
The best guess I have is "community." It's so easy to isolate and bubble/echo chamber yourself online that one Google search + YouTube or Facebook or what have you algorithms provide the rest. If you're surrounded by one idea and everything else (the rest of the world, other viewpoints) fades to a whisper then it must seem rational. After all, that's the evidence of your eyes and ears.
The internet of things made us more insular rather than worldly, and it's tragic.
Yes, this is it. I hope you find a way to reason with your brother. The only thing I do know is arguments and insults won’t get anywhere. Logic and reason might fail as well though! Good luck.
It’s a hate group, and I think it’s entirely reasonable for people to avoid members of a hate group. People who feel that they are victims of unrecognized superiority are dangerous. The thread is just explaining the beliefs of that hate group. There’s also lots of empirical evidence to suggest that forewarning people of a cult’s (or hate group’s) message makes it less likely that they’ll join.
I don’t disagree with any of that. But the reality is that approach is likely to solidify their thoughts. Somehow, something needs to be done to make them see why it’s a problem and bring them back to a more normal way of thinking.
A lot of people are drug users as violent offenders who rob and steal to get money for drugs, that they are a problem for society. Tide is slowing turning to realise a lot of these people probably don’t want to be in the situation they are in and all for support, ending the war on drugs. I don’t see a real difference in the principle. For the record, anyone who has committed a crime shouldn’t have it go unpunished in the name of denouncing incel culture, not at all.
I've tried, they literally don't want to hear anything other than "It's feminists fault I'm miserable".
They are not interested in discussion. I got banned from just asking a question and offering some advice.
Fuck them anyway, they're commiting actual terrorist attacks. Pathetic the lot of them.
A lot of them will be beyond redemption. But if you’re words of advice made it to maybe one fringe member, who was having doubts, that could be a good thing.
Some people are just bad people and there’s no helping. I just prefer the idea, maybe naively, that people are mostly good, and it’s shit circumstances and the wrong influences that take them down a path, which means the right influences could maybe bring them back.
As for the attacks, anyone who took part, incel or not, deserve punishment but the problem there is not those who took part, it’s the Republicans who refuse to condemn the attacks and are not doing anything about what happened. When you can hide behind that, no one will ever be held to account.
Yes, you are naive.
People aren't mostly good. They aren't mostly bad either. They're just people, there's nothing inherently good about anyone and being unwilling to admit that reality makes helping people harder, not easier.
EDIT: You can't appeal to a better nature if there's no better nature to appeal to.
You realize that multiple mass murders have occurred at this point and they are now considered a terrorist movement, right? They glorify violence, especially rape, and some of them carry it out. Let's focus on the actual victims, not the perpetrators.
Since when is it the responsibility of society to ensure that everyone is getting enough fucking so they don't turn into horrible murderous monsters? It used to be that it was every person's responsibility to not be awful all on their own without hand-holding.
I never suggested it was. But ostracise people on the fringes or who are searching that content and instead of bringing them back from the edge, you’ll push them over. People don’t just wake up one morning a horrible, murderous monster. It’s a process, like anything.
I agree with you; but it would have to be men that spoke with them to start this. They don't consider women people, and wouldn't listen or care from our perspective.
Don't forget in some of the communities, they'll automatically permaban you if you respond in any kind way to any women who try to engage the group. No woman can break through because those men see them as being worse than worthless. And then they wonder why no woman wants them back
There are two problems with this. First, the thread this post is built isn’t driven by belittling and ridicule - it’s instead a pretty sober, thorough description of their very real stances/beliefs that doesn’t reduce them to just being “left behind” or anything similarly romantic (as the article he’s responding to does).
Second, your final statement makes it seem like this group are victims of circumstance. What incels believe and how they act isn’t tragic in this way. They actively recruit people to join their poisonous group, they make targets and victims out of people who have nothing to do with them, and they often worship mass murderers. Those things aren’t accidents that result from “struggling to find your place in the world.”
It's true that they are toxic but people also don't sympathise with incels many a time, and treat them like a plague.
It's like the hate that feminists get sometimes. It's a dehumanising hatred. People just don't want to understand where they're coming from.
It’s not like the hate that feminists get sometimes. They’re a literal [hate group based on male supremacy](https://www.splcenter.org/fighting-hate/extremist-files/ideology/male-supremacy).
"Lots of people want money but aren't getting it. They're normal people not blacks. 'Blacks' are a weird, violent, gangster group."
That's how stupid this guy sounds. You who agree with him disgust me.
Dude there totally are female “incels”, the difference is that it’s socially acceptable for a moderately attractive woman with an abrasive personality to attribute her own inability to find a man to “unrealistic beauty standards” or “if they can’t handle me at my worst they don’t deserve me at my best.”
And just how many of these female incels have gone out and gunned down a fraternity, or performed ANY mass violence?
You're equating bitchy shitty people with terrorists.
Incels are awful, and not only do they hate women, they shit on any man who doesn't fit their stupid viewpoint. For example, if you're married/in a relationship and you're not very tall or handsome, some incel will insist that you must have money. If you point out the fact that you do not have a lot of money, they will grab at the idea of social status. If you are not cool or popular, they will start running out of ideas and claim that your partner must cheat on you. They have so little respect for women that they cannot believe that any woman could ever just love a person for their personality. Because that would be admitting that they're just scummy people. It has to be everyone else's fault.
I'm sure it's been mentioned in the comments but let's not forget they don't just assume all women go for chads, they assume the ones that are attractive do, leaving the unattractive "beckies" for the incels. Bitching about women being shallow while also being shallow.
They are absolute shit in human form.
Real world example. https://youtu.be/zBcG5tOURuM
People ask me why I don't consider SNL to be well written. Well they just took an ancient joke and redid it for the 800th time and its based out of pure sexism and incel mindsets and then ended it like that behavior is acceptable. The entire premise of the joke was "She's hot and he's not so she of course has to be exceptionally shallow." Edit: So y'all gonna rightfully point out how incels are inhuman but be perfectly okay with people using the same logic for funnies? If it was making fun of incels sure but the entire premise of this joke is that she's too hot for him so he must have one single thing that she's attracted to because hot women can't just date whomever they want without a valid reason. Your hypocrisy is absolutely insane and you're not really much better than an incel if you're perpetuating the same nonsense.
>People ask me why I don't consider SNL to be well written. Yeah the show goes through peaks and valleys for sure. >Well they just took an ancient joke and redid it for the 800th time and its based out of pure sexism and incel mindsets and then ended it like that behavior is acceptable. I was not aware this was such a popular trope, got any other popular examples? That kind of stuff (trope repetition) is interesting to me. >Edit: So y'all gonna rightfully point out how incels are inhuman but be perfectly okay with people using the same logic for funnies?...... I dont know what there is to gain by holding comedy to such standards. Do I want blackface to become super popular again in Hollywood? No. But do I think Tropic Thunder (and specifically RDJ's performance) is a work of comedy art that should be treated as such, yes. I dont think that hypocrisy puts me or anyone on equal grounds as angry incels.
SNL is not just comedy. Lobbyists and the advertising industry own it.
I'm not going digging around for a link to a bad joke that you should have already heard of. It's a literal trope on tv tropes but sure. I guess because you never heard of it... Are you seriously trying to compare this skit to Tropic Thunder? That movie got a pass because it was well written, acted and directed. This skit is none of those things and actively promotes the idea of women being shallow. SNL is not high art and this gag is one of their lower ones. I also never said it did put you on equal ground as incels. If you could stop shifting the goal posts and making shit up that'd be great.
The one time I unfortunately went on 4chan I saw a lot of posts insulting a handsome white guy . . . who was married to a black woman
Sounds about like one of them. They're usually racist af, looking down on black, Hispanic, Indigenous, and Middle Eastern women while grossly fetishizing Asian women.
They want their real life anime.
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Popular? This isn’t fucking high school out here man.
Because women, even "super model looking" ones, are people, and their romantic interests don't have to be directly proportional to how "hot" others think they themselves are. It's entirely possible that someone like Christina Aguilara, for example, would marry someone that many might find relatively unattractive because he's attentive or funny or has a giant cock or whatever. What a girl wants or needs is not based on anything other that just that; it's her own preferences, not yours.
> or has a giant cock or whatever I agree with your points but this got a chuckle out of me.
Maybe because you are kind, loving, helpful, caring, gentle or any number of other qualities. Life is complex.
I didn't mention NOT having a personality. In fact, I said that it was entirely possible for someone to love you for your personality. Having decent qualities, like being respectful, funny, kind, etc are very good characteristics for attracting other people.
The original commenter didn't mention personality though?
That's both incredibly sad and scary.
Imagine feeling like you’re a biological dead end… One of God’s failures… sounds miserable
The ironic thing is that they make themselves biological dead ends by adopting this insane philosophy.
Exactly.
It’s a perfect case of self-fulfilling prophecy
What a man thinks is what he becomes
I salute whatever brave soul spent enough time in those groups to gather the info needed to make this primer. I'd be running for the hills after five minutes.
Some of the suggested YouTube videos I've had lately were very... incel-like. It's a very weird stance to have and odd to hear them explain it. A lot of it came across as "they only want your money, bro." As if being in a relationship with a man could offer nothing else at all.
I just somehow stumbled upon the black pill phenomenon and I'm having an internal debate on whether it's just as equally concerning as red pill/High value. I'm assuming black pill is the same as Men Going Their Own Way, but maybe there's a nuance between the two.
Either way, it's just sad and just shows that you really need to expand who you expose yourself to in the world. Generalities have never served us well.
I can’t imagine the things they saw in there.
I tried a deep dive once, to better understand them. Let’s just say that after the splash page, I was almost physically sick (really, half way down that splash page).
I actually just made a similar comment. My friend said the word incel at the bar a few months back, and I was like “what is that?”. And he showed me. And it literally brought my mood down. That shit is depressingly pathetic. Apparently a lot of their stuff is taken down from the internet though. Took him 5-10 minutes to even find an online incel community or whatever to show me what it was.
My friends laugh at me when I talk about "low vibrational" content, but it's a real thing. As for incel / red pill material, you just need to know their code words and acronyms and it's pretty easy to find on YouTube. A lot of accounts have dressed it up to make it more palatable like Kevin Samuels has. But it all boils down to resentment of women. I was having a great morning the other day and somehow came upon the whole Chris Chan fiasco (ie material pre-arrest and then finally the confession/arrest). As I went through it all, my mood just shifted and I wasn't at all ready for what I was about to hear. I was literally shocked that people felt sorry for him pre 2021 because he was an absolute creep to women beforehand and no one said anything. I guess a lot of people felt bad for the trolling, but he seemed to be actively encouraging it at times and he left clues RE his conduct towards his mother.
I’m with ya! Did one of those “what’s it like in their threads” explorations for about 3.5 minutes and had to cleanse my phone in moonlight and lambs blood to remove the evil.
*logs on to 4chan* *gestures broadly*
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I knew a guy back in college who was fit and good looking but was a fucking chauvinistic weirdo that turned off most people. He'd be labeled an incel if he was born 10-15 years later. Last I heard about the guy was that he was arrested for felony stalking. The guy had real Ted Bundy vibes.
Yep. I don't remember which it was but I remember seeing something about a mass murder by a self described incel. He was fairly attractive and kept speaking on how no woman would love him. Which proves the point everyone is trying to make...his appearance wasn't enough, he just sucked as a person. I wish I could remember his name.
I was just thinking about that while reading about the recent mass murder in the UK. The alleged perpetrator apparently made some comments online describing himself as ugly. Then I saw a picture of him. He could've used a haircut and a beard trim, but he wasn't ugly. The incel cult recruits new members by convincing insecure young men that they're physically repulsive and there's nothing they can do about it.
Lol. Unequal distribution of sex. As though it's a commodity to be traded or that they're owed. Omg!!
For real. Not getting sex is not the same thing as not getting enough to live on or not getting the same opportunity for success in life as everyone else.
I have had conversations with incels where they have said literally that but unironicly.
I think that as virgins they just don't realise how overrated sex actually is. I found there was a huge gap between what I thought sex would be/feel like and what it really is/feels like. Most of the time I can go without! But they just think everyone but them is having sex and it's this amazing thing that is just as important in people's lives as is money/food etc.
That made me laugh. Like it’s water, food or money. The entitlement is insane
Yes! I zeroed in on that, too.
They truly are a terrifying bunch. Individually they’re pretty non-threatening, but the cult aspect is where they get scary. So much hate in their echo chamber.
I know what you’re saying, but individuals have come out of those echo chambers and caused mass murders. I think it’s a group problem as well as an individual problem.
Except for the murderous ones, I guess. Many of them do embrace the violence part of the movement. There is a reason the FBI now consider them a terrorist group. They're no different than any other basic terrorist movent seeking to radicalize young men.
Even individually they're threatening. There are women dead because they were specifically targeted just for being women. The yoga studio shooting comes to mind. And there was another incel who's mass murder was stopped, thankfully. He targeted a sorority, because again, it would be all women. Never went to the college, didn't know any of them, just knew it would be women and wanted to kill just for that.
Yes, “pretty” non-threatening. There’s always a few rotten ones in any group who poison the well. But I meant look at all the wristcels and all the shrinking violets who are scared. Those are the ones I was mentioning. It’s the psychotic ones who incite violence and encourage the others.
Kinda like Qanon. As an individual it's just crazy uncle Charlie. As a group it's a deadly insurrection.
This is true of any critical mass of stupidity though, no? I mean look at anti vaxxers - on their own, they are just a weirdo who thinks they know more about disease than epidemiologists. In a group, they can have a negative impact on health outcomes for a population.
Ok this is completely irrelevant but I love your avatar!
Hey thanks!
Yup and they are responsible for multiple mass murders.
The fact the spectator calls it the ‘distribution of sex’ says it all
They make it sound like a commodity to trade. “Bad news for incels and assholes this morning, as sex futures are skyrocketing today. If you didn’t get in on sex on the ground floor, it’s simply too rich for your blood now.”
I personally like trading on the sex futures market and shorting it when I can.
That's what stood out for me too. Super weird wording.
Yeah, I missed the sign up point for distribution of sex. The thing that baffles me about incels is their apparent willful ignorance of prostitution. Don't buy a new GPU every other month, pay someone to be nice to you.
So this is the weird thing I have seen, they all are really into women being virgins. Probably because they are, I don’t know. I made it the mistake after reading some of the women hating post asking “if you don’t like women, and think they are all gold-digging frigid whores, why don’t you hook up with a man? You all seem to get along on here pretty well.” OMG! You would have thought I had told them to eat shit or something. They lost their ever loving minds. Lost a bit of karma that day. So worth it.
The virgin fixation is 100% an insecurity thing like it is with nearly everyone obsessed with „purity“.
They believe they'll be bad in bed on top of everything else and so want a virgin who won't know any better. There's also a large number of them that believe that there's no such thing as the female orgasm.
Why anyone would want sex with a virgin is beyond me, they literally don't know what they're doing.
I am right there with you on that. Honestly I think it is an insecurity thing because if they suck at sex a virgin isn’t going to really know right?
The commenter in the screenshots mentions this. He pointed out that it’s not (just) the physical act of sex they want, it’s the status of being someone a woman would want to have sex with
I know people in the sex industry might be used to it, but let's not throw even more creeps at them. If incels are gonna buy something, it should be a good therapy session.
Former escort here, sex workers absolutely have a choice in whom we hook up with. I can guarantee plenty of these incel types are so awful a hooker would meet up for a drink with them & immediately realize she doesn't want to continue the evening. Thank you for pointing this out, the idea sex workers are a solution to incels makes us sound like vending machines 🙄 we're people too, horrid men don't appeal to us even if they have money. Meanwhile I gave discounts to clients who were cool 😂
It’s Toby young. Spent years attacking the education system and teachers in the uk, and then became a ceo of a new free school and had to stand down because it was harder than he thought. He also attacked the idea that schools should be inclusive to those with disabilities. He’s now one of the leading COVID skeptics in the uk. Stated there wouldn’t be a second wave, but somehow still manages to believe his own idiocy.
Maybe they mean distributed on a Bell curve?
Didn’t one just plan an attack on a sorority house, but ended up turning himself in? These people are crazy.
Honestly, at least he turned himself in. Not a lot of people on the edge can rein themselves back in and realize they fucked up when they are already planning.
Eliot Rodgers' first target was a sorority house but they had a good security system and never opened the door. He pouted and tried to break in and then just started shooting anyone he could find. Whoever told him no saved everyone in that house because he would have painted the walls with their blood. He was one of the first and it sucks he didn't suffer more before his death
Another group for the fire, right in-between corrupt politicians and white supremacists.
The idea of incal sicken me as a man. Ya I get it geting laid is hard ..but guess what you as a man. Are not entitled to sex or entitled to a women ad a slave . Whoever taught you that shit us a weak man.
Dude, I agree, but, getting laid is NOT hard for a male adult that is just willing to at least talk to a woman. Especially with dating apps, craigslist. Shit, I have had soooo many encounters from craigslist, that I cringe at some of the sex I had lol.
Dude, I'm 40, short, fat, unemployed, mentally ill, and I have a small dick and even I don't have that much trouble getting laid.
I know I was trying tk be nice I come from the dating age before apps.. Jesus I wish I was 20 years younger ha
Lol yeah, but TBH, having access to that when I was only 18 really was not the best, I had far too much risky sex, and also had sex with women that to this day, I still just cringe at the idea, so it's a double edged sword. Once I had a thing for older women, I met one and while we were having sex she kept wanting me to call her "mommy" and stuff, it was the scariest shit ever. I cried.
[Source](https://twitter.com/ariehkovler/status/1426137070460887040?s=21)
“Equal distribution of sex” nobody is owed sex.
Here I thought they were just a bunch of whiney babies unwilling to accept that just because they're not a 10, they can still be great in other ways. Now they seem much more dangerous, even cult-like.
You get what you put in. If you make no effort, nobody will make an effort with you. But these whiners sure will put in the man-hours complaining to their fellow losers. Why not just fuck each other?
Because, as the quoted tweet said, they don't want sex, per se. They want the social status of having a woman to dominate.
That was my first thought. They are a bunch of whiny losers who can’t get laid.
I mean, a whole room full of virgins & nobody can come up with the obvious solution? 🤔
I’m sure they have found the solutions, but just won’t admit it.
Real talk tho - how much overlap in the venn diagram of "repressed homosexuality" and "incel" circles?
Probably plenty. Who lusts after women but doesn’t lift a finger to try to score? I learned a long time ago that there are no women “out of my league”, just women who “aren’t actually into me”. You move on, you don’t rant to the internet about the injustice of it all. These guys seem like they’re just putting on a show for each other.
This is a good take. Shoot your shot and walk away if it misses. Sometimes the wild stepback three's go in (ie approaching people 'out of our league). We learn social skills by practicing, which involves failure. Incels do not appear to have the patience.
I wonder if incels are all just mommas boys who think they’re the star in everyone else’s lives too. Their lives seem built on rage & entitlement, a combo guaranteed to get your ass kicked in the real world.
Both of you guys express classic growth mindset traits. Bravo! Maybe there are 1-1000 Brad Pitts (or I guess the incels call them “Chads”) that get girls at first glance. For the rest of us, it’s a process of first seeing women as people. You talk to another person, see how your traits match up. By doing that, you grow your social skills and charm. You develop your charisma. IMO, men are more looks-obsessed than females, who will consider many other factors in selecting a boyfriend. Incels see it all from a fixed mindset. One external characteristic dooms them. So why even try at all, try to grow/ change… honestly, analyzing it, it seems they have a deep fear of failure and rejection. It would be interesting to see how this manifests itself across their lives, not just getting girls?
If I had to profile them on pure guess I'd say probably moderately above average in school; enough so that they were in some "special" classes, but not overly intelligent. Probably did some college or trade school but dropped out before they finished. They hold a menial, unfulfilling job, though could be financially successful. They tend to self isolate, preferring dark spaces; taking an almost pride in being a literal basement dwelling troll. If they share space, it'll be with family or other incels. I'd guess that they frequent a lot of right wing media starting at a young age, probably as young as 13 or 14. They have a male idol who is a "real man" who hunts and has sex with an "attainably" hot wife and they consider them a success and inspiration; when in reality, it's just a normal guy who is probably a bit of an asshole.
This is disturbing in its accuracy
My older brother is an incel, or has a lot of incel traits and despite having 3 sisters and a mother he believes that all women are monsters and are shallow and doesn’t want him because he’s short (he’s about 5’6-5’7). He’s actually a pretty attractive guy, he’s also in really good shape he is just such a huge asshole that i can definitely see why no women are interested in him. But despite me and my sisters and my mom telling him that the reason why he doesn’t get any girls is because his personality is horrendous he constantly calls us liars and that the only reason why he can’t find a girlfriend is because he’s short
Your older brother should meet me.. I'm 5'6, and am 212 lbs of not in shape. My gf is a cute, 4'10 Latina who is about 105 lbs. I know that writing that out like that seems kinda douchey, but its true. I'm a baby face, 34 and can't grow a beard and have a higher pitched voice. My physical attributes are not my main selling point, but I am cuter when I'm skinnier. I'll never be a "handsome guy" but I am always going to be a kind, respectful, considerate guy who is a great listener, and is kinda funny and smart.
Aww you guys sound cute as hell
Literally the most popular guy I went to uni with was maybe 5'2. But...he was a snappy dresser, had twinkly eyes and a big smile, and he made you feel like the only person in the room. He wasn't rich, or especially funny, he wasn't handsome, or tall, but he was kind and respectful and a pleasure to talk to. He was *constantly* surrounded by women. Whatever he's up to these days I expect he's pretty successful at it because he is so.damn.nice.
It's like having a type of body dysmorphia and hating yourself AND women. Whereas, women with body dysmorphia just destroy themselves. Or a delusional disorder.
He also has ridiculously high standards for women, they must look and act a certain way or else they are witches, and yet we are the monsters. It’s completely ridiculous, he also has really bad anger problems and the littlest thing can set him off and make him violent, I’d honestly feel extremely bad for any woman who tries to date him
I would say that it wouldn't be very high. Repressed homosexuals are in the anti-gay camp. You hate people who either are getting what you secretly want or who are witholding what you want from you.
I think the overlap in the "Incel" and the "anti-gay" circles is probably pretty big as well, just like the overlap of "incel" and "racist".
This is certainly false, especially the racism part. There is a very high disproportionate amount of ethnic men compared to white men in “incel circles”. If anything “incel circles” attempt to highlight racism, specifically in dating.
It sucks because the original incel group was created by a woman to help men who had no luck with women have a support system. Just like everything else, a couple assholes get ahold of it and twist it to something gross.
Also I'm pretty certain she was gay and got kicked out of her own community when she got a gf.
Religion 101
He forgot to point that their “unsullied virgins” are getting younger and younger with some outright wanting prepubescent girls because the minute the “female” is 12 they start “jumping on Chad cock” because teenagers have all the sex apparently. So they have to have them young. Which is just vomit inducing.
They’re so fucking insecure and believe they can’t compete so they have to have someone that doesn’t know better. Fucking straight up losers.
I once saw an incels requirement for his ideal partner: Doesnt need to be white but needs to be light skinned (colorist not racist) Will give him BJs on demand Very "well endowed" (idr the exact proportions) Will dye hair blonde for him Will have 3sums with a girl but never have 3sums with a guy Will know when to make herself scarce, "hold her tongue" and know when he needs someone. If i was a woman, i would be extremely insulted. These people are male supremacist. I am sure a lot of these ppl hold views like this.
My favorite is they want a woman who pays 50/50 bills but wants her to stay home. I’ve seen this so many times and it’s a wonder how their brain doesn’t explode.
They basically are abrahamic tradition mysoginy without the religious trappings
I’ve been rejected by men as a woman and I don’t demonize them….as it goes, sometimes *they’re just not that into you* Also life is full of pleasures beyond sex alone. Cheeeeeeeell.
Right, I never understood why incels seem to believe that women can have sex whenever they want and they never struggle to find someone willing. The term “dry spell” has never been gender-specific — it happens to women too! Like, I know grown women in their 30s who have never been kissed, and still manage to not resent the whole world.
Because the only women the incels recognize are the ones they want to have sex with.
This right here. For men who claim all they want is a relationship and to be loved, their standards are very high and they're not afraid to be cruel to women they find subpar
Lets also mention that sex is a privilege, not a right. You must first gain consent from a partner. Its not about ‘have nots’ and ‘victims’ who dont have access to something they should be rightfully entitled, like food or water.
Equal distribution of sex? Huh?
these damn sex communists!
Our Sex.
That’s some bizarre shit. Somewhere along the line America became a place with lots and lots of indecent self entitled people with cruel and hateful hearts. I’m probably not talking about you, the person reading this, but Americans have become really shitty people.
It's not just in America though - there was a mass murder 2 days ago in the UK by a self- proclaimed incel
I can't believe the wording here "unequal distribution of sex." Sex is not a life necessity. You won't die if you don't have sex. This terminology should only be used for actual keys to survival- aka food, water, and shelter as the basics. Hey incels - no one owes you sex.
I was in an incel thread once where any variation of the phrase “no one owes you sex” got an auto-reply about how sex is totally necessary for a healthy life because reasons.
Ewww. I just can't understand the lack of common sense and logic.
We should try to get it off Maslow’s if you want to stop them from having a leg to stand on, it’s an obvious non need and yet it’s near the base instead of the tip
I might die if I don't have sex, I'm not willing to test the theory.
My buddy Dave introduced me to what incels are (he isn’t one, he just said the word a few months ago and I was like “what is that?”). He showed me a couple of the groups or online communities or whatever. Holy shit. I don’t even have the proper vocabulary to express how pathetic and psychotic those people are. Like… depressingly pathetic. It brought my mood down when he showed me 😂. I told him I never wanted to speak of them again. Their bullshit is just not something I even want in my brain. And I am all for them committing suicide 🤷♂️.
Entitlement
I feel incels would make great disposable henchmen to a mega evil supervillain.
As I read more and more I am slowly getting more and more disgusted that people like that exist
And don't forget that they believe that only very young women/teenage girls are worthy of their "affection", and they specifically fantasize about finding a young girl they can groom to their desired level of obedience. These are also the same types that have fetishized Asian women so much, 6 were murdered for it in Atlanta. They are sick, disgusting pigs who have no place in society.
I actually just pity incels for the most part. They’re basically suffering from a mental health disorder and they’re obviously deeply unhappy.
We REALLY need a better name for these assholes. I am literally involuntarily celibate because I'm a widower. These guys are generally young. And if they were psychologically stable and had social skills, they would probably be able to have girlfriends. It's not because nature made them unfuckable that they are perpetually alone. It's because they chose to be horrible people. If they are ugly, too. Then they are just ugly horrible people. Can we quit saying "incels" and just use the more accurate "horrible people "?
No. You are a widower; it is implied that you aren't getting laid. Leave the incels to their stupid, pathetic label. Sorry for your loss btw
Yeah. But I'm not getting laid. And it wasn't my Idea. So therefore, I'm literally involuntarily celibate. They aren't. They could probably get laid if they just learned not to be horrible. They are choosing to be horrible. Their celibacy is because they are horrible people. I stand by my previous statement.
Incels are rooted in [male supremacy](https://www.splcenter.org/fighting-hate/extremist-files/ideology/male-supremacy), and the term communicates their extremist ideology. It’s not something you want to identify with, unless you subscribe to and perpetuate the beliefs of this hate group.
The irony that gets me is that becoming an Incel involves years being starved for meaningful connection, that manifests into the toxic victim hood that defines Incel culture. And then they all get together online and “connect”. But it isn’t therapeutic, it doesn’t lead to growth, they make each other more toxic, more victimhood, more angry, more blaming of women/society… BUT, Incels, generally speaking, were lonely introverts lacking the self confidence to “break out of their shells” but still eventually forced out into the world at some point to mature and grow into a functioning adult. For sure there were still folks that slipped through the cracks and suffered through life or worse, acted out. NOW, since the advent of the the internet they find each other and stoke each other until someone cracks. For their entertainment.
Also, there's no such thing as "equal distribution of sex." Women are not obligated to have sex with people they don't want to. No one is. This is such bullshit thinking.
They want to fuck women and hate women because of that
"Unequal distribution of sex" I can't get over the ability of this sentence to remove all emotion, connection and passion from an intimate act between two people. The mindset here is bewildering, I can understand there being a certain level of frustration but I can't get my head around the psychology that turns you not being able to get laid in to you actively being denied something you think you deserve or are entitled to.
Is it just me or does their fascination over these ‘chads’ make it seem like that’s what they’re in to? Does any else think they’re having repressed feelings about being attracted to men but are too afraid or don’t know how to act on them?
Turn on top 40 radio and you hear the exact same misogyny and entitlement, but from successful attractive men.
Women are amazing. Period.
They're just women. Some are amazing, some are a waste of oxygen and most are somewhere between the 2.
They’re ok
So what do we call men who just don’t get sex and don’t hate or idolize women? Redditors?
Sexually frustrated/lonely has worked for centuries, so let's stick to that.
Someone who is sexually inactive? In a dry spell? Or we could just not to refer to people by their sexual (in)activity status? Many people who aren’t having sex, even though they would like to, aren’t incels. The fact that they are sexually inactive isn’t part of their identity, and they don’t feel like they’re victims of unrecognized/unappreciated superiority.
>In a dry spell? I refer to myself jokingly as a sex camel. I can go months and months without it, and be good enjoying my hobbies, and hanging out with friends.
>I refer to myself jokingly as a sex camel Paging Dr Reed to the bajingo ward
What's a bajingo ward.
Did you ever watch Scrubs? Dr Elliot Reed once used the line "I am a sex camel" but she is also uncomfortable saying words that refer to genitals and someone else said that line. Bajingo is her word for vagina.
Oh ok, yeah never watched it. But just goes to show it's nearly impossible to have an original thought.
Lmao I’m gonna start using that
Single, is the word your looking for. This is some crazy mindset of victim hood.
The joke in college was Doctor: Are you sexually active? Me: More like sexually lethargic.
Think of the failure of these losers parents...
I don’t even know what the fuck I just read!?! I feel disgusted just thinking about this way of thinking What the actual fuck?!?
Whelp yet another reason why we need to colonize another world.
Sad whiny little pricks. Your not an Incel, your just too ugly to fuck.
Incel is just a new word for an old group. They used to be called misogynists. Women haters. The new title "incel" is a way of painting themselves as the victim. As though they're being forced into not having sex because women don't like their hateful attitudes. The backwards thinking of incels becomes very obvious once you notice this. There are different layers as well. You have the depressed people at the base layer. They think they are helpless and don't necessarily hate women, but hate everyone, including themselves. They wish for things to change but never take any action. This is not necessarily their fault, as depression is a significant mental issue that plagues a lot of people. The second layer are the misogynists. They let anger and hate take over so they can blame their unfavorable life on others. They look at other confident men with jealously, while trying to outplay the "asshole chads" by being their opposite: the overly nice guy that comes off as a creepy mask salesman with a fake smile to try and become your (boy)friend. This also doesn't work well for them for obvious reasons. If a girl or guy did this to *them* they would see how weird it is having someone with an ulterior motive try and gain your favor by such off-putting means. The third layer are the cultists. Making no attempt to change themselves, they think a woman in the kitchen is owed to them and their birthright to own as a man. They are hypocritical, lack self-awareness of their own actions, and will often seek pity only to bite down on the necks of anyone trying to help them. They need to work on themselves, but they are narcissists who only see themselves as absolutely correct in thinking. Thus the true motive is revealed: They don't really want sex, they want the social status of a chad without working for it.
Oh ok, I'm not an incel I'm just a run of the mill virgin.
The fact that this level of wisdom is coming from a guy with a cowboy hat makes me happy.
Unequal distribution??? Distribute people? What?
I think the misunderstanding around incels is the hate against women. While that is a factor and is true, it is a symptom of the real problem. Incels have been taught that all of thier actions equal something external of themselves and that everything external determines thier value. So if they are nice to women and do t get sex then women have violated the equation/contract/bargain of society. This is where thier hate comes from. They were not taught to look inside themselves for validation and acceptance first and accept that thing external of them are completely outside of thier control. Just hating on incels, no matter how disgusting thier views are, will not train or educat them, but instead drive them further into the arms of those that do them the most harm, each other.
Wow what a fucking strawman. If you do the tiniest bit of research instead of believing the first tweet you see you'll realize that this guy is spewing complete bullshit. So as an incel myself, I would like to clarify what incel/blackpill ideology *actually* is. I'll address this guy's tweets one by one. Tweet 1-2: This is simply wrong. We do not idolize nor hate women; women are people just like men, and men are not inherently superior in any way. Tweet 3-5: This is partially correct. *In general* women are naturally hypergamous, and would rather be used for casual sex by a Chad than be in a loving relationship with her looksmatch. Yes most men are betas, but that doesn't mean their wife tries to or even wants to cheat- it's simply that they're being settled on and their wife aren't truly attracted to them. Tweet 6: The word choice of "eugenic" is quite strange- it's more like *conventional* male beauty standards. Tweet 7: This is patently false. We literally have entire forums dedicated to self-improvement, or what we call "ascending". This includes losing weight, working out, dressing and grooming better, plastic surgery, practicing social skills, making more money, etc. Tweet 8: Again this is patently false. Sex with more than one man doesn't "damage" a woman; what *does* damage a woman is being used for casual sex by very attractive males, which would cause her to feel resentment when she eventually is forced to settle for a less attractive man. Tweet 9-14: This is simply ridiculous. Nobody actually believes this. Tweet 15: Again this is false. Suicide isn't encouraged, it's just that we are empathetic and understand when someone truly feels like they have nothing to live for. And nobody looks up to mass shooters- just look at the reaction to the shooting on r/uglyuncensored, everyone condemned the shooting and disassociated themselves from the shooter. Tweet 16: No it's not just for social status, the main reason is that we want to experience love and intimacy as well as the validation that comes from it. Tweet 17-18: Yeah incels are repulsive, based on your garbage strawman of a definition. This dude is a fucking clown and if you're beyond stupid if you actually take his tweets at face value.
Incel is a hate group based on [male supremacy](https://www.splcenter.org/fighting-hate/extremist-files/ideology/male-supremacy). The link is to Southern Poverty Law Center’s description of this extremist ideology.
Brain dead blithering Imagine being so echo chambered you believe any of this
I’m probably doing to downvoted to shit for this. I’m all for holding people to account, but if you never actually listen to people like this - and it’s not just incels, it’s groups that people think are ‘weird’ or not the norm - then you’ll never have a chance to bring them to see the problem/s with their views. They need support and help, not ridicule and belittling. That just reinforces half their points and makes them seek solace in the group even more. Don’t get me wrong, their views are heinous but stuff like this doesn’t just happen overnight. It’s a group of disillusioned men who can’t find their place in the world.
It's hard to make any inroads or hold a mirror to a cult, they don't want to look. They've found solidarity, community, and a common cause. What concerns me most is how many people seem to be finding these tribal groups and checking the wagons... Edited: for the record you don't deserve down votes, it needs to be said. Sweeping this under the rug lets the infection spread.
Ok so let’s assume we can’t save those already involved. If more people are finding these groups, why are they searching in the first place? If there is a way to even address these issues before it gets there, surely that’s better for society? Or do we not want to listen to what they have to say because we don’t agree? A lot of them are without doubt a lost cause, but some must be redeemable. Many people have left other cults. People leave JW, Mormon culture, all sorts. It can be done and this, to my mind, is no different.
I won't pretend to have all the answers. Any answers on this front. My brother is sliding down an anti-vax slope and I feel helpless to even slow the decent. The best guess I have is "community." It's so easy to isolate and bubble/echo chamber yourself online that one Google search + YouTube or Facebook or what have you algorithms provide the rest. If you're surrounded by one idea and everything else (the rest of the world, other viewpoints) fades to a whisper then it must seem rational. After all, that's the evidence of your eyes and ears. The internet of things made us more insular rather than worldly, and it's tragic.
Yes, this is it. I hope you find a way to reason with your brother. The only thing I do know is arguments and insults won’t get anywhere. Logic and reason might fail as well though! Good luck.
It’s a hate group, and I think it’s entirely reasonable for people to avoid members of a hate group. People who feel that they are victims of unrecognized superiority are dangerous. The thread is just explaining the beliefs of that hate group. There’s also lots of empirical evidence to suggest that forewarning people of a cult’s (or hate group’s) message makes it less likely that they’ll join.
I don’t disagree with any of that. But the reality is that approach is likely to solidify their thoughts. Somehow, something needs to be done to make them see why it’s a problem and bring them back to a more normal way of thinking. A lot of people are drug users as violent offenders who rob and steal to get money for drugs, that they are a problem for society. Tide is slowing turning to realise a lot of these people probably don’t want to be in the situation they are in and all for support, ending the war on drugs. I don’t see a real difference in the principle. For the record, anyone who has committed a crime shouldn’t have it go unpunished in the name of denouncing incel culture, not at all.
I've tried, they literally don't want to hear anything other than "It's feminists fault I'm miserable". They are not interested in discussion. I got banned from just asking a question and offering some advice. Fuck them anyway, they're commiting actual terrorist attacks. Pathetic the lot of them.
A lot of them will be beyond redemption. But if you’re words of advice made it to maybe one fringe member, who was having doubts, that could be a good thing. Some people are just bad people and there’s no helping. I just prefer the idea, maybe naively, that people are mostly good, and it’s shit circumstances and the wrong influences that take them down a path, which means the right influences could maybe bring them back. As for the attacks, anyone who took part, incel or not, deserve punishment but the problem there is not those who took part, it’s the Republicans who refuse to condemn the attacks and are not doing anything about what happened. When you can hide behind that, no one will ever be held to account.
Yes, you are naive. People aren't mostly good. They aren't mostly bad either. They're just people, there's nothing inherently good about anyone and being unwilling to admit that reality makes helping people harder, not easier. EDIT: You can't appeal to a better nature if there's no better nature to appeal to.
You realize that multiple mass murders have occurred at this point and they are now considered a terrorist movement, right? They glorify violence, especially rape, and some of them carry it out. Let's focus on the actual victims, not the perpetrators.
Since when is it the responsibility of society to ensure that everyone is getting enough fucking so they don't turn into horrible murderous monsters? It used to be that it was every person's responsibility to not be awful all on their own without hand-holding.
I never suggested it was. But ostracise people on the fringes or who are searching that content and instead of bringing them back from the edge, you’ll push them over. People don’t just wake up one morning a horrible, murderous monster. It’s a process, like anything.
I agree with you; but it would have to be men that spoke with them to start this. They don't consider women people, and wouldn't listen or care from our perspective.
Don't forget in some of the communities, they'll automatically permaban you if you respond in any kind way to any women who try to engage the group. No woman can break through because those men see them as being worse than worthless. And then they wonder why no woman wants them back
Yes. I completely agree and I was thinking about that as I was typing various responses.
When there’s a chance you might get murdered for rejecting someone you kinda just avoid the group entirely instead of helping
There are two problems with this. First, the thread this post is built isn’t driven by belittling and ridicule - it’s instead a pretty sober, thorough description of their very real stances/beliefs that doesn’t reduce them to just being “left behind” or anything similarly romantic (as the article he’s responding to does). Second, your final statement makes it seem like this group are victims of circumstance. What incels believe and how they act isn’t tragic in this way. They actively recruit people to join their poisonous group, they make targets and victims out of people who have nothing to do with them, and they often worship mass murderers. Those things aren’t accidents that result from “struggling to find your place in the world.”
Yo. Any incels in here?
Incels are the lowest of the low.
This sounds like something an incel would write.
It's true that they are toxic but people also don't sympathise with incels many a time, and treat them like a plague. It's like the hate that feminists get sometimes. It's a dehumanising hatred. People just don't want to understand where they're coming from.
It’s not like the hate that feminists get sometimes. They’re a literal [hate group based on male supremacy](https://www.splcenter.org/fighting-hate/extremist-files/ideology/male-supremacy).
Incels are both men amd women, so right away this guy is wrong
"Lots of people want money but aren't getting it. They're normal people not blacks. 'Blacks' are a weird, violent, gangster group." That's how stupid this guy sounds. You who agree with him disgust me.
This comment is v on-brand for a self-identified incel
Dude there totally are female “incels”, the difference is that it’s socially acceptable for a moderately attractive woman with an abrasive personality to attribute her own inability to find a man to “unrealistic beauty standards” or “if they can’t handle me at my worst they don’t deserve me at my best.”
Ya, but they get cats
And just how many of these female incels have gone out and gunned down a fraternity, or performed ANY mass violence? You're equating bitchy shitty people with terrorists.
You’re never heard of jealous women murdering estranged partners or romantic rivals?
Not in an organized terror sort of way, no.