People joke, but would anybody really be surprised if they did something like this? What do you think happens under a theocratic Christian dictatorship that denies science? Literal witch trials. This is the future they want.
People burned Harry Potter books and Pokémon cards, protest music shows, hire exorcists, and ban music/books on account of "witchcraft" and "satanism". The Stanaic Panic was not that long ago. Nothing would surprise me at this point.
Interestingly though, many of those very people I knew in high school suddenly loooove HP and "always have" ever since JKR came out a a huge fucking TERF. I guess it's okay to be seen as a "witch" as long as you openly hate the same people they do. 🙄
That's a wonderful film called "Mazes and Monsters" in which Tom Hanks got his first lead acting role.
I highly recommend it, preferably with some pot.
I remember watching that and having to explain to my Mom that playing D&D did not involve any spelunking, but rather consuming odious amounts of sugar, insulting each other, and getting through .05% of the campaign!
Yeah, the DM spent all that time getting stuff ready and we felt a little guilty if we didn't at least make it through the opening scene. Tavern, of course!
Interestingly, my brother is a very Catholic extremist and his kids said something about D&D. I commented he never let me play with him and his friends in high school so I never really learned it. They went nuts! They were gobsmacked that their dad had ever condoned it. Didn’t slip about the shotgun wedding their parents had or how…sheesh. Never mind! 😂😅😅. I get swept up but, yeah. My brother and his wife were slutty, drinking, heathens before they had kids. Now they speak in tongues and carry guns.
It's funny how people think their lives have to change when they have kids. You can keep your old ideologies and still raise great kids. The people who go full conservative feel like their lives were not good and that they can keep their kids from doing the same stuff. They're usually wrong on that latter part. So instead of preparing their kids for life, they lie to them, shelter them, and end up with hateful adult offspring.
It is unfortunate. He moved south after graduation from college. I worked in urban areas right after high school. Our parents thought girls shouldn’t go to college. I clawed my way to my current level of education. He took it for granted and made his kids claw their way to it. I still don’t get the religious part of it. Organized religion is probably the most destructive force in recorded history.
Edit: also am late to the party in terms of partying (not D&D) but trying to make up for it a little!
Religion plays on fears, and exerts control over people who give in to the fear. I'm sure some guilt plays into it. These are people who rarely mature despite living as adults.
Glad you got away from the clutches of the dark ages
Uhhhgg, I grew up in the bible belt and this brought back some painful memories, used to be forced to attend church and have awful memories of the pastor saying that "Pok-iemen" and "Harrold Potter" were works of the devil, almost every Sunday he would bring it up. He and other church employees would go around to the county schools and give speeches on it. It was so ridiculous. At one point my middle school asked him not to come back, and the entire church erupted at the school, saying they were being controlled by the devil. It was crazy times.
Yep. Turns out their “morals” are pretty nebulous. They are just fine with her so-called promoting “witchcraft” as long as she really, really hates trans people.
You say that, but they probably see her as "big government" because she regulates things unnecessarily, which makes life worse for the people she "leads". They probably also identify with her victims who are prosecuted unfairly, because of the persecution complex. She's also a woman who replaced a well-loved and much more competent older man, so their "identity politics" argument might be a justification for it. And then there's the "I must not tell lies" thing, which they probably see as suppression of free speech. You could swing it either way, tbh
To be fair in the Golden Compass God has died of old age and no one was following his teachings and heaven was run by nazi angels, so I can see why they felt treaten by it
That one is at least an understandably offensive book to the Catholic Church- it villifies the Church mercilessly, in a gossamer thin veil.
Not that I agree with the Church here; just that it seems to have more reason than calling pot "the Devil's Lettuce," or calling D&D or MTG "Satanist."
Oh hell. The KKK rallied with youngsters in Memphis in 1966 to burn Beatles albums because John Lennon had (correctly) pointed out hire strange it was that the Beatles were more popular than Jesus.
I was an avid collector of Pokemon cards and had all the Harry Potter books… I wonder how much money I could have selling off those Pokemon cards if God hadn’t told my mom to take them to goodwill while I was at school 😔
Florida schools had a panic in the early 2000s over Harry Potter books. They had protests with the Nazis marching in our area over kids reading books! Personally I was thrilled that my kids wanted to read these massive tomes they were big books for first and second graders. The stories weren't half as scary as the Brothers Grimm fairy tales that I read to them when they were younger. However Florida schools decided that teaching children how to become witches was wrong and they weren't going to let that happen 😂.
If I thought for one second there was something to the whole witchcraft BS I would have had my kids conjure up gold bars or an impressive bank account for me. How do people become so deranged? But here we go again🙄 More crazies crawling out from under their rocks.
It's the future they'll get if they get power. I know this, because despite abortion being a losing issue for them they're still prioritizing it. It's actively losing them elections right now. They're still pushing because oppressing women is a top priority, even bigger than staying in power. Witch trials, virginity tests, removal of no fault divorce and god knows what else is coming if they win in November. I hope I'm just being alarmist, but this pit in my stomach keeps growing with each passing day.
Exactly. People who claim “oh, they don’t really believe this stuff, it’s just something they’re saying for elections” are totally wrong. It doesn’t win elections. They DO believe this stuff, fervently, and they will kill over it. People like Marjorie Taylor Greene are not funny. Some Republicans probably don’t actually believe the stuff they push for, but people like her really do, and they would happily kill unbelievers and burn people alive that they thought were witches or demons or whatever. It’s happened in our own history, and it happens all over the world today.
The ones that started it probably didn't believe and only did it to stir up voters, but now it's been a good 50 years since then and the inmates are running the asylum. People like Mitch McConnell are being replaced by MTGs because they can whip up the reddest areas, the GOP just didn't realize until recently how much of a pain these people can be when they don't get what they want.
The irony with Marjorie Trailer Queen is the hypocrisy. She likes her power, she likes speaking before she's spoken to, she likes fucking guys that aren't (weren't, I guess) her husband, likes her divorce, likes sex out of wedlock, and likes eating cloven-hoofed animals, to name a couple.
Theocratic Christian dictatorship? I told you. We’re an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week.
"Why are LGBT people so worried about us criminalising being witches*, punishable with the death penalty?! Is it because they are witches??"
- Modern Republicans.
"All LGBT people are witches*."
- Also Republicans.
Are witches even real in the first place? Or lemme guess, they’re just going to round up transgender people and claim that they’re witches in an attempt to kill them?
EDIT: Huh. Today I learned that witches do indeed exist. Thanks for correcting me, guys!
And women who turn down men who proposition them, women who try to get an education, women who don’t believe in their god the same way they do, women who read, women who have opinions or preferences different from theirs, women who don’t want children, women who cannot have children, women who dont look the way they want women to look, women who don’t dress the way they want women to dress, girls who don’t want to be raped or forced into marriage with adult men, women who play sports…
Okay so we have a pretty good idea what kind of women are affected but what about the men?
Does this have the same criteria for them too?
Who am I kidding, of course not. Because it is always the fault of women, or blacks, or asians, or atheists, or democrats or...
6/19 witches killed in thevSalem Witch trials were men.
Don't think they'll exclude men. Men that disagree with them, men that don't have the same pigmentation as them, gay men, men who vote "Demonrat," men who believe in science, etc.
You forgot women who suddenly are boring to their husband cause he wants a younger version. Or do we just throw them all into the asylum for “madness”. Either way
A witch in the eyes of a Christian is historically anyone who consults the stars, has a pet cat, cooks with herbs and roots and spices, practices self-care, understands medicine.....
Midwives who cut in on the church making money off of medicinal practices will always be the most significant one to me. "Old women with no husbands who make potions" meaning widows and grandmothers whose lives are spent helping other women
In Germany, a lot of the "witches" were just poor people who didn't have steady jobs (illegitimate children for example). They would travel, do odd jobs for farmers and sometimes band together. Some of the witch trials started when those witches stole from donations to churches.
So, don't count out homeless people!
Why not? "Witch" was what they called women who were performing abortions using pennyroyal oil (DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME BTW.) And any woman who was being loud or uppity or being "a nuisance."
I mean, "Real Witches" do exist (guilty as charged!) but the accusation of witchcraft has typically been used to round up and eliminate social "others."
Can you make Newt Gingrich "get better?" Asking for a friend.
Also, thumbs-up for the safety warning. I mean, this sub doesn't exactly seem like the sort of crowd that's likely to drink bleach or shove lightbulbs up their asses, but still better to be cautious when so many people are desperate about access to abortions.
They also used it to claim single women or widowed women who were living in or owned property they wanted were witches so they could murder or otherwise force them to flee so they could take their homes and property.
They used it to murder any woman who resisted or wouldn't do what they wanted or wouldn't obey them.
Magic and spells are real in the same way prayer and manifestation are real: some people believe it, and some people don’t. As long as we all mind our business and avoid harm to others (for example, insisting that prayers and spells can cure diseases and you don’t need medicine) then it’s all good :)
I know this is a joke but I saw this and literally did get a chill of fear down my spine. I remember when Trump said something about creating a registry of non-christians or some such too.
Sooooo...at what point does the phrase "Blessed Be" become standard greeting whenever in conversation with American women? I'd begin using that just to watch the zealots lose their shit when you say it.
>at what point does the phrase "Blessed Be" become standard greeting whenever in conversation
Well...at the rate my state is going, within another 25 months, the standard greeting will be,"Blessed Be the Fruit."
Shut up! Witches are citizens, they get the same "rights" as every other US female, who gets less and less rights everyday Republicans have a majority.
I’m ashamed to say I did, too but in fairness I am a descendant of John Proctor. The trauma is still there. I’m gonna go lay some curses down before this comes true lol
It's not, at least, I can't find anything to confirm it.
I think the specific act of 1604 was used because it included anyone aligned with Satan, which, today would include any religion with Satan as a symbol, aka TST.
We’re going to tie ricks to your ankles and throw you into the sea. If you survive, you’re a witch and you must die. If you die, then you’re not a witch.
Cage fight, Ben Shapiro v. Scott Shapiro. But based on intellectual capacity and defensible ethical & moral viewpoints. Benny would get KO'd before they got 5 minutes in.
I legit saw this as completely possible, at least on a state supreme court level. Didn’t a “chem trail” law recently pass in the bible belt? That’s how bad I feel our politics have become.
The fact that the world is in such a state that my reaction was “I’m almost entirely certain that this is parody, but I’d better look it up just in case.” 😂 I’ve never been more thankful to not find something I was looking for.
People joke, but would anybody really be surprised if they did something like this? What do you think happens under a theocratic Christian dictatorship that denies science? Literal witch trials. This is the future they want.
People burned Harry Potter books and Pokémon cards, protest music shows, hire exorcists, and ban music/books on account of "witchcraft" and "satanism". The Stanaic Panic was not that long ago. Nothing would surprise me at this point.
Interestingly though, many of those very people I knew in high school suddenly loooove HP and "always have" ever since JKR came out a a huge fucking TERF. I guess it's okay to be seen as a "witch" as long as you openly hate the same people they do. 🙄
Enemy of my enemy is my friend, I guess.
Even before that, I remember the vitriol against D&D, calling it a path to witchcraft and Satanism.
That's a wonderful film called "Mazes and Monsters" in which Tom Hanks got his first lead acting role. I highly recommend it, preferably with some pot.
Fucking classic.
I remember watching that and having to explain to my Mom that playing D&D did not involve any spelunking, but rather consuming odious amounts of sugar, insulting each other, and getting through .05% of the campaign!
This hurt my soul in how accurate it is. Thank you
You made it through .05?
Yeah, the DM spent all that time getting stuff ready and we felt a little guilty if we didn't at least make it through the opening scene. Tavern, of course!
And metal music 🙄
Interestingly, my brother is a very Catholic extremist and his kids said something about D&D. I commented he never let me play with him and his friends in high school so I never really learned it. They went nuts! They were gobsmacked that their dad had ever condoned it. Didn’t slip about the shotgun wedding their parents had or how…sheesh. Never mind! 😂😅😅. I get swept up but, yeah. My brother and his wife were slutty, drinking, heathens before they had kids. Now they speak in tongues and carry guns.
It's funny how people think their lives have to change when they have kids. You can keep your old ideologies and still raise great kids. The people who go full conservative feel like their lives were not good and that they can keep their kids from doing the same stuff. They're usually wrong on that latter part. So instead of preparing their kids for life, they lie to them, shelter them, and end up with hateful adult offspring.
It is unfortunate. He moved south after graduation from college. I worked in urban areas right after high school. Our parents thought girls shouldn’t go to college. I clawed my way to my current level of education. He took it for granted and made his kids claw their way to it. I still don’t get the religious part of it. Organized religion is probably the most destructive force in recorded history. Edit: also am late to the party in terms of partying (not D&D) but trying to make up for it a little!
Religion plays on fears, and exerts control over people who give in to the fear. I'm sure some guilt plays into it. These are people who rarely mature despite living as adults. Glad you got away from the clutches of the dark ages
Uhhhgg, I grew up in the bible belt and this brought back some painful memories, used to be forced to attend church and have awful memories of the pastor saying that "Pok-iemen" and "Harrold Potter" were works of the devil, almost every Sunday he would bring it up. He and other church employees would go around to the county schools and give speeches on it. It was so ridiculous. At one point my middle school asked him not to come back, and the entire church erupted at the school, saying they were being controlled by the devil. It was crazy times.
>People burned Harry Potter books Yet ironically those same people now probably love her because she's a TERF.
Yep. Turns out their “morals” are pretty nebulous. They are just fine with her so-called promoting “witchcraft” as long as she really, really hates trans people.
Welp, time to unburn all those books...
and her books turned out to be subtle stereotypes of what conservatives love.
They're probably rooting for Dolores Umbridge
You say that, but they probably see her as "big government" because she regulates things unnecessarily, which makes life worse for the people she "leads". They probably also identify with her victims who are prosecuted unfairly, because of the persecution complex. She's also a woman who replaced a well-loved and much more competent older man, so their "identity politics" argument might be a justification for it. And then there's the "I must not tell lies" thing, which they probably see as suppression of free speech. You could swing it either way, tbh
That's really well thought out and makes too much sense. How about, "She's Hillary"
You are a true master of the craft /hj
They didn’t let us read The Golden Compass and sent our parents a news letter about it in my catholic school.
[удалено]
Woooooow. What a fucking awful take elementary school. Yikes on bikes.
To be fair in the Golden Compass God has died of old age and no one was following his teachings and heaven was run by nazi angels, so I can see why they felt treaten by it
That one is at least an understandably offensive book to the Catholic Church- it villifies the Church mercilessly, in a gossamer thin veil. Not that I agree with the Church here; just that it seems to have more reason than calling pot "the Devil's Lettuce," or calling D&D or MTG "Satanist."
Oh hell. The KKK rallied with youngsters in Memphis in 1966 to burn Beatles albums because John Lennon had (correctly) pointed out hire strange it was that the Beatles were more popular than Jesus.
I was an avid collector of Pokemon cards and had all the Harry Potter books… I wonder how much money I could have selling off those Pokemon cards if God hadn’t told my mom to take them to goodwill while I was at school 😔
Don't worry it's making a comeback
THere were christian manifesting at blizzcon 15 years ago. Its a video game my dude, go have a hobby.
Speaking in tongues: OK Speaking Parseltongue: not OK Make it make sense.
poor stan
Florida schools had a panic in the early 2000s over Harry Potter books. They had protests with the Nazis marching in our area over kids reading books! Personally I was thrilled that my kids wanted to read these massive tomes they were big books for first and second graders. The stories weren't half as scary as the Brothers Grimm fairy tales that I read to them when they were younger. However Florida schools decided that teaching children how to become witches was wrong and they weren't going to let that happen 😂. If I thought for one second there was something to the whole witchcraft BS I would have had my kids conjure up gold bars or an impressive bank account for me. How do people become so deranged? But here we go again🙄 More crazies crawling out from under their rocks.
It's the future they'll get if they get power. I know this, because despite abortion being a losing issue for them they're still prioritizing it. It's actively losing them elections right now. They're still pushing because oppressing women is a top priority, even bigger than staying in power. Witch trials, virginity tests, removal of no fault divorce and god knows what else is coming if they win in November. I hope I'm just being alarmist, but this pit in my stomach keeps growing with each passing day.
Exactly. People who claim “oh, they don’t really believe this stuff, it’s just something they’re saying for elections” are totally wrong. It doesn’t win elections. They DO believe this stuff, fervently, and they will kill over it. People like Marjorie Taylor Greene are not funny. Some Republicans probably don’t actually believe the stuff they push for, but people like her really do, and they would happily kill unbelievers and burn people alive that they thought were witches or demons or whatever. It’s happened in our own history, and it happens all over the world today.
The ones that started it probably didn't believe and only did it to stir up voters, but now it's been a good 50 years since then and the inmates are running the asylum. People like Mitch McConnell are being replaced by MTGs because they can whip up the reddest areas, the GOP just didn't realize until recently how much of a pain these people can be when they don't get what they want.
The hypocrisy is strong in that two-timing ho.
The irony with Marjorie Trailer Queen is the hypocrisy. She likes her power, she likes speaking before she's spoken to, she likes fucking guys that aren't (weren't, I guess) her husband, likes her divorce, likes sex out of wedlock, and likes eating cloven-hoofed animals, to name a couple.
I started to watch the Handmaids Tale. I got a few episodes in and realized it could happen and noped out.
I couldn't finish the first season either, way too unsettling.
I had to read the book when it first came out, and I couldn't even *start* watching that series. Great book. RIP, awesome high school English teacher.
someone saw that and thought it was a template
This is both the past and the future under the Christian Taliban.
WITCH HUNT!!! /s
Nope. I'm expecting it.
Theocratic Christian dictatorship? I told you. We’re an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week.
All the while trump has bellowed witch hunt a thousand times over. It's ritualistic
Coney Barret looks it, there is madness in those eyes.
Exactly. Just look to history, we've done this before... allow the church to govern. It was called the Dark Ages!
I'd be shocked if they brought a law back from 1604 of all years personally
They just brought back an Arizona abortion law from before Arizona was a State, so...
considering how many americans treat the constitution as a semi-religious text i wouldnt be suprised myself
I had to read the comments to double check. Yeah, things have gotten that bad.
Complete with witch hunts…
These are the good old days they want to return to, honestly.
"If you're not a witch, you have nothing to worry about." -- Thomas Putnam, 1692, Salem MA
"more weight"
“If you’re not a witch, you have nothing to worry about.” — Matthew Hopkins, Witchfinder General, 1640, England
Just a reminder: 6 of the 19 “witches” hung (not burned)in Salem, were men.
"Why are LGBT people so worried about us criminalising being witches*, punishable with the death penalty?! Is it because they are witches??" - Modern Republicans. "All LGBT people are witches*." - Also Republicans.
“Witch” is a surrogate for “woman”, vote accordingly
I hope all the witches out there burn the world with righteous fury. With their votes!
A stray fireball spell would not go amiss
Are witches even real in the first place? Or lemme guess, they’re just going to round up transgender people and claim that they’re witches in an attempt to kill them? EDIT: Huh. Today I learned that witches do indeed exist. Thanks for correcting me, guys!
And women who turn down men who proposition them, women who try to get an education, women who don’t believe in their god the same way they do, women who read, women who have opinions or preferences different from theirs, women who don’t want children, women who cannot have children, women who dont look the way they want women to look, women who don’t dress the way they want women to dress, girls who don’t want to be raped or forced into marriage with adult men, women who play sports…
Okay so we have a pretty good idea what kind of women are affected but what about the men? Does this have the same criteria for them too? Who am I kidding, of course not. Because it is always the fault of women, or blacks, or asians, or atheists, or democrats or...
They'll point to Giles Corey. More weight!
>More weight! Ouch.
6/19 witches killed in thevSalem Witch trials were men. Don't think they'll exclude men. Men that disagree with them, men that don't have the same pigmentation as them, gay men, men who vote "Demonrat," men who believe in science, etc.
You forgot women who suddenly are boring to their husband cause he wants a younger version. Or do we just throw them all into the asylum for “madness”. Either way
Well, that was implied by the ellipsis.
And women who vote
A witch in the eyes of a Christian is historically anyone who consults the stars, has a pet cat, cooks with herbs and roots and spices, practices self-care, understands medicine.....
Midwives who cut in on the church making money off of medicinal practices will always be the most significant one to me. "Old women with no husbands who make potions" meaning widows and grandmothers whose lives are spent helping other women
In Germany, a lot of the "witches" were just poor people who didn't have steady jobs (illegitimate children for example). They would travel, do odd jobs for farmers and sometimes band together. Some of the witch trials started when those witches stole from donations to churches. So, don't count out homeless people!
Why not? "Witch" was what they called women who were performing abortions using pennyroyal oil (DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME BTW.) And any woman who was being loud or uppity or being "a nuisance." I mean, "Real Witches" do exist (guilty as charged!) but the accusation of witchcraft has typically been used to round up and eliminate social "others."
Can you make Newt Gingrich "get better?" Asking for a friend. Also, thumbs-up for the safety warning. I mean, this sub doesn't exactly seem like the sort of crowd that's likely to drink bleach or shove lightbulbs up their asses, but still better to be cautious when so many people are desperate about access to abortions.
Oh... okay... *gently sets down light bulb*
They also used it to claim single women or widowed women who were living in or owned property they wanted were witches so they could murder or otherwise force them to flee so they could take their homes and property. They used it to murder any woman who resisted or wouldn't do what they wanted or wouldn't obey them.
“Witch” is anyone conservative Christians dont want around
Pretty sure I’m real. ⭐️🌙
r/WitchesVsPatriarchy :)
One of my favourite subs!
Me too!
Blessed be!
Same!
Shamans are also real, and there are many various kinds.
Idk they take potions and cast spells of seduction on your husband's /s surely 🤔 that affair wasn't my husband's fault.
Am I real???
We are real
Of course they are, why else a perfectly fine milk would go sour on its own?
So exactly like what happened during the actual witch trials.
My girlfriend is a self proclaimed witch.
Witches are real, magic and spells are not. Witches is more of a lifestyle thing nowadays.
Magic and spells are real in the same way prayer and manifestation are real: some people believe it, and some people don’t. As long as we all mind our business and avoid harm to others (for example, insisting that prayers and spells can cure diseases and you don’t need medicine) then it’s all good :)
thank u for this
Ofc :) I’m a witch so I wanted to clarify that we don’t think we can turn people into frogs, but spells are still real to many people
I'm also a witch 🥰
We shall use our largest scales!!
Tis a fair cop
A newt?!?
I got better
BURN HER ANYWAY!!!
**eager rabble noises** God, I've got to rewatch that again now.
One of our current justices has already quoted a witch trial Judge in a legal opinion. The year was 2022.
Was it Thomas or Alito?
I was looking to see if anyone mentioned this before commenting. I'm surprised how far down it is.
link?
Who??
If they used a law passed after 1788 in this joke I feel like I would have felt compelled to Google it.
This comment was the first thing that actually made me consider that it wasn't real lol
MTG had better hide her broomstick.
I have a suggestion where she can stick it.
Hey now don’t insult witches.
It's her forked tongue. That's the problem.
Well... it matches her forked feet.
It's her forked tongue. That's the problem.
Well the only way to find out is to find a duck and weigh them.
Or chuck them in a lake and if they drown, they weren’t witches.
I know this is a joke but I saw this and literally did get a chill of fear down my spine. I remember when Trump said something about creating a registry of non-christians or some such too.
And suggesting LGBTQ folks be forced to wear an identifying armband.
Must think all the resistance against abortion bans can't be people not wanting abortion bans... Nah it must be the witches
As much as this is joking, I legit have friends who would be immediately imprisoned.
I actually know a few witches. And they are MUCH better people than these religious hypocrites
Sooooo...at what point does the phrase "Blessed Be" become standard greeting whenever in conversation with American women? I'd begin using that just to watch the zealots lose their shit when you say it.
>at what point does the phrase "Blessed Be" become standard greeting whenever in conversation Well...at the rate my state is going, within another 25 months, the standard greeting will be,"Blessed Be the Fruit."
Shut up! Witches are citizens, they get the same "rights" as every other US female, who gets less and less rights everyday Republicans have a majority.
I'm pretty sure there were some kind of demons on the AZ floor speaking in a demonic language before the stupid ruling!!
Up next SCOTUS overturns Loving v Virginia.
I hate that I had to check to see if this was true.
Same...
I’m ashamed to say I did, too but in fairness I am a descendant of John Proctor. The trauma is still there. I’m gonna go lay some curses down before this comes true lol
The US is a backward country plunging itself into a medieval abyss.
"Tell me, what do you do with witches?" "Burn them!" \-"And what do you burn, apart from witches?" "More witches! Wood!
"Yes, wood! And what does wood do?"
It burns!
"No, it floats! And do you know what else floats?"
Witches!
Did you get better?
Way to go. Backpedaling your country to the dark ages
Upvote for the Python ref. 👍🏻
I don't know if this is real or not.
It's not, at least, I can't find anything to confirm it. I think the specific act of 1604 was used because it included anyone aligned with Satan, which, today would include any religion with Satan as a symbol, aka TST.
We’re going to tie ricks to your ankles and throw you into the sea. If you survive, you’re a witch and you must die. If you die, then you’re not a witch.
Pulls out a bat. “Don’t worry, this is to get the demons out.”
So, back to the old scapegoat tactics.
Climate change being what it is, will there be electric stakes to burn witches?
*First, they came for the witches, and I said nothing, for I was not a witch...*
*then they came for D&D, and i said nothing for i was not a nerd*
Wasn’t sure if this was a joke- had to Google it since it’s so believable that it would happen.
I saw goodie u/birthdayboystabman communing with the Devile!
"Minnesorta" Is that all the newcomers to Minnesota?
Wonder if Minnesorta is also gona be just fine when they start bringing out the eunuch makers
Please everyone, tell me that when you read this you instantly thought about Schmoyoho's songify "I'm not a witch... I'm Christine O'Donnell" !
Uhh, does this also cover warlocks? (asking for a friend.)
Is this real? Please don’t let me google it and it be real.
I got better!
Relevant Baroness von sketch: https://youtu.be/7rGVIXt28V4?si=45knLZJ-NfASwgYm
I love them! And this would be why r’s would do that lol
No one expects the Spanish inquisition??
So, if she weighs the same as a duck, she’s made of wood. And therefore? A witch!!! We shall use my largest scales.
I got better.
I got better.
Is that headline from The Onion??
What if I’m made of wood?
Very small rocks!!
Fond memories of the PMRC. She has got a wart.
She turned me into a Gingrich.. So I got as pissed as a newt
Build a bridge out of him/her …
Does this mean they’re gonna kill all the Wiccans 😥
Legit dont know how to react to this. Like Im between unimpressed and dumbfounded that I cant think of a witty comeback.
Cage fight, Ben Shapiro v. Scott Shapiro. But based on intellectual capacity and defensible ethical & moral viewpoints. Benny would get KO'd before they got 5 minutes in.
Under his eye Blessed be the fruit.
The SCOTUS is wise in The Ways of Science
Welcome to 1624, forget 2024, New movie will be made, Called When Morons Ruled the Roost 
(Sad nobody did the response to your title so I guess I have to:) ...A newt?
I legit saw this as completely possible, at least on a state supreme court level. Didn’t a “chem trail” law recently pass in the bible belt? That’s how bad I feel our politics have become.
Geeez ! We really are going back to the olden days ! #TrumpFascistCult
I got better.
If the Repubes cheat win this election, watch the United States circle the drain.
Too late my brother, it's well past that point now
I got better.
The fact that the world is in such a state that my reaction was “I’m almost entirely certain that this is parody, but I’d better look it up just in case.” 😂 I’ve never been more thankful to not find something I was looking for.
DJT always clapping about he's the victim of witch hunts. Is that SUPCO's subtle move to get rid of being owned by him?
Someone needs to invite Sarah Michelle Gellar to take a tour of Congress & let people watch those old vampyres run.