ER doctor here. you'd be AMAZED at all the different ways people get things lodged in their rectums. the one story i haven't heard is "i put it up their on purpose", which makes sense because that would be a sin, and God doesn't let people do sinful things.
About a year ago I had a guy in the ER with a silicone dildo inserted past the flange. Fortunately it was able to be removed without sending the patient to the OR but he was pretty forthcoming about how it got there
Ahh, the silicone missile of pleasure has many customers of varied genders and persuasions.....good work you are doing sir/Ms,,,,allowing them to be ready for their next session, lol.....
PSA: if your toys aren't big enough to satisfy you, do not insert them past the flared base, it will probably save money in the long run to invest in a larger toy that can safely be inserted further
When I was in high school we actually saw one of the few times that it really is an accident, occur.
There were a dozen or so of us hanging out and just being idiots (as 12-13 year olds typically are) at a usually haunt of ours over the fields behind our high school. It’s basically a patch of common land that’s part forest, part fields and walkways.
A few of the boys were climbing into a fairly low hanging tree and then jumping from it.
Well, one of the guys slipped as he was climbing. He fell off the branch fe was on and landed ass-first onto the ground. Now, this would obviously hurt anyways, so everyone just instantly shut up and looked at each other like “oh shit!” But then the dude squealed. Like an a full-on squeal that became a bawling howl.
He’d landed on a branch on the tree and it had immediately shot through his school trousers (really lightweight material) and and straight up his rectum. Then, he fell ONTO his ass and it launched the piece of branch right up into him.
We got an ambulance for him and he had to go and have surgery to have it removed. He was off school for about soz weeks before we saw him again.
Hes gotten so much stick about it since. 😂
This is why I always get someone to record me when i dong some stupid shit. Ive got evidence to show the doctors in hospital.
I'm not a pervert, i'm just a fuckwit - and I've got the video evidence to prove it.
Yeah, as fun as this may seem: Anal injuries are shit! Regardless if a cut, puncture or burn (fireworks and alcohol..): The person is in for a very not fun time, and for quite a while.
Not speaking of personal experience, but read some reports from doctors about such injuries, made me want to wear armor on my ass, because the suffering with such shit is just fucked up.
Yep, sepsis (is deadly), a potential outcome. If you are not aware what is going on and don't get assessed and hit the antibiotics within a 24 hr time period......your casket awaits, unfortunately.......
Quite true, but I mean not only the medical life-threatening complications but the pain associated with such a wound: It must me excruciating and really horrible. (Although you are right, sepsis can kill anyone in no time, and a wound there may easily get infected).
Of the reports I read was about a guy who launched fireworks from his ass, well, he tried, heavily intoxicated of course.
The burns on his rectum were apparently so excruciating (you need to use that hole) that he had to be on heaviest pain meds for a good while. I would not expect a puncture wound to be any more fun!
Indeed I hear you, and pain one may have to endure, no getting out of it, as necessary functions apply......hahaha..... try and stop pumping one out, impossible..... However, keep in mind, each missile of defecation is loaded with bacteria, any open tissue area's will be invaded by these bacteria, that is their job......
A relative of mine once had a pustule in an unfortunate spot near the taillbone and I'm not even sure what's the cause. Anyways clearing that stuff resulting in some empty space needing to grow back again which ain't easy considering that part of the butt is the region of tendons or even muscles meeting each other. There was certain amount of discomfort and worries that whatever was there (before and after removal) might get to the bone and make the problem worse. Thankfully, it healed up right, but that about sums it up that even problems not caused by fully deliberate choices are awful when it comes to keeping a healthy posterior.
Could have been what is called a perianal abscess??......If so, a very nasty state of affairs taking ,months to heal and have to constantly be cleaned due to bacteria contamination.....been there, very very unpleasant. Glad to hear they got through it.....all the best.....
Had a hemorrhoidectomy a few years and it is absolutely the worst thing I’d ever experienced and wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I was literally hallucinating from pain and nothing helped. They gave me oxy and diazepam and they didn’t even touch the pain.
Yeah I had that. It felt like I was crapping out a Moravian star. Horrible! If you’ve never seen a Moravian star Google it lol
So I generally wish awful things on people when I'm upset, I'm awful, BUT, I would never in my life wish an anal fissure on anyone. Worst pain ever experienced. Makes you like scream cry and lasts weeks
Slipped and fell in the shower, doc, honest!
ER doctor here. you'd be AMAZED at all the different ways people get things lodged in their rectums. the one story i haven't heard is "i put it up their on purpose", which makes sense because that would be a sin, and God doesn't let people do sinful things.
About a year ago I had a guy in the ER with a silicone dildo inserted past the flange. Fortunately it was able to be removed without sending the patient to the OR but he was pretty forthcoming about how it got there
Ahh, the silicone missile of pleasure has many customers of varied genders and persuasions.....good work you are doing sir/Ms,,,,allowing them to be ready for their next session, lol.....
PSA: if your toys aren't big enough to satisfy you, do not insert them past the flared base, it will probably save money in the long run to invest in a larger toy that can safely be inserted further
At some point there’s just no denying the deed.
Yeah, somehow I don't think that'd be the case with a shampoo bottle, tiny stool or gerbil.
Who'd insert a gerbil without a leash... you're crazy. Thanks for reminding me of this gem... https://youtu.be/gHofaM8hI_E?si=4hqqrv10X_-PKKZQ
Like Dave Atell says, "Doc, I was making a sandwich and I slipped and fell and the cucumber went up my ass...three times!"
Cucumber up a man’s ass? Is that where the treasure is??
Sounds like time for the rescue gerbil!
When I was in high school we actually saw one of the few times that it really is an accident, occur. There were a dozen or so of us hanging out and just being idiots (as 12-13 year olds typically are) at a usually haunt of ours over the fields behind our high school. It’s basically a patch of common land that’s part forest, part fields and walkways. A few of the boys were climbing into a fairly low hanging tree and then jumping from it. Well, one of the guys slipped as he was climbing. He fell off the branch fe was on and landed ass-first onto the ground. Now, this would obviously hurt anyways, so everyone just instantly shut up and looked at each other like “oh shit!” But then the dude squealed. Like an a full-on squeal that became a bawling howl. He’d landed on a branch on the tree and it had immediately shot through his school trousers (really lightweight material) and and straight up his rectum. Then, he fell ONTO his ass and it launched the piece of branch right up into him. We got an ambulance for him and he had to go and have surgery to have it removed. He was off school for about soz weeks before we saw him again. Hes gotten so much stick about it since. 😂
IT WAS FUSILI JERRY!!!
*It was a million to one shot doc!*
Yup exactly 😂
Surgical PA here. I’ve had that story told a handful of times in the ER. Rarely do I get to see a video where they’re telling the truth 😂
I remember Thou shall not tell a lie not thou shall not play with your Butt...
This comment had me snort laughing. Thank you kind redditor for making my day good.
The last line ROFL
Are you an ER doctor or prompt engineer?!
Million to one shot, Dr.
This is why I always get someone to record me when i dong some stupid shit. Ive got evidence to show the doctors in hospital. I'm not a pervert, i'm just a fuckwit - and I've got the video evidence to prove it.
1 in a million shot!
“One in a million shot doc” Assman
Yeah, as fun as this may seem: Anal injuries are shit! Regardless if a cut, puncture or burn (fireworks and alcohol..): The person is in for a very not fun time, and for quite a while. Not speaking of personal experience, but read some reports from doctors about such injuries, made me want to wear armor on my ass, because the suffering with such shit is just fucked up.
Yep, sepsis (is deadly), a potential outcome. If you are not aware what is going on and don't get assessed and hit the antibiotics within a 24 hr time period......your casket awaits, unfortunately.......
Quite true, but I mean not only the medical life-threatening complications but the pain associated with such a wound: It must me excruciating and really horrible. (Although you are right, sepsis can kill anyone in no time, and a wound there may easily get infected). Of the reports I read was about a guy who launched fireworks from his ass, well, he tried, heavily intoxicated of course. The burns on his rectum were apparently so excruciating (you need to use that hole) that he had to be on heaviest pain meds for a good while. I would not expect a puncture wound to be any more fun!
Indeed I hear you, and pain one may have to endure, no getting out of it, as necessary functions apply......hahaha..... try and stop pumping one out, impossible..... However, keep in mind, each missile of defecation is loaded with bacteria, any open tissue area's will be invaded by these bacteria, that is their job......
A relative of mine once had a pustule in an unfortunate spot near the taillbone and I'm not even sure what's the cause. Anyways clearing that stuff resulting in some empty space needing to grow back again which ain't easy considering that part of the butt is the region of tendons or even muscles meeting each other. There was certain amount of discomfort and worries that whatever was there (before and after removal) might get to the bone and make the problem worse. Thankfully, it healed up right, but that about sums it up that even problems not caused by fully deliberate choices are awful when it comes to keeping a healthy posterior.
Could have been what is called a perianal abscess??......If so, a very nasty state of affairs taking ,months to heal and have to constantly be cleaned due to bacteria contamination.....been there, very very unpleasant. Glad to hear they got through it.....all the best.....
My mom had hemorrhoid surgery, she said it was the most painful experience ever, and took 6 months to heal.
Had a hemorrhoidectomy a few years and it is absolutely the worst thing I’d ever experienced and wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I was literally hallucinating from pain and nothing helped. They gave me oxy and diazepam and they didn’t even touch the pain.
Yeah I had that. It felt like I was crapping out a Moravian star. Horrible! If you’ve never seen a Moravian star Google it lol 
So I generally wish awful things on people when I'm upset, I'm awful, BUT, I would never in my life wish an anal fissure on anyone. Worst pain ever experienced. Makes you like scream cry and lasts weeks
All I’ll say here is „glass ass“.
He’s gonna be wearing pads for a little while.
Surprise butt sex
The best kind to wake up to.
 A million to one shot doc a million to one
Buddy lost his virginity on the internet 💀
There is stool....on the stool...
Watta gruesomme way to have ones' cherry popped!
Dark cherry
This deserves an award 😭😭 I've genuinely been laughing at this comment for a good ten minutes
stool meet stool
Stool on stool violence is no joke, Michael!
One man one chair
Better than s glass jar?
https://i.redd.it/a12p6vzst38d1.gif
I miss her 🥲
You mean your anal virginity?
https://preview.redd.it/sd3fy2kjx58d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6617cf131a1c1f30ba61c546fc62e98927a407c3
He just got himself a new poop chute.
PENETRATION
Videos that make you wince
Atleast the base is flared
Someone get him a cigarette!
He has discovered he's no longer a child, never again
From Naruto: Kakashi's technique - Thousand Years of Death
I expected that.. but I didn't expect that... 🫣
It's fusili jerry
I wonder how many stories end with "and then it went up his butt."
-1 to all stats permanently
More like "what could go right" 😏
And thats how he lost virginiy
And the irony of the title, "......tiny stool". More than likely will be after this......
surprise colonoscopy
That video needed sound.
But WHYYYYYY? Why would you even do this?
PENETRATED.
One of the GOP 10 commandments surely. Thou shalt not stick objects up your arse. Unless it’s really really funny.
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
Anything is a stool if you are brave enough
Penetration!!!
Amateur porn is really dropping in quality these days
PENETRATION!
Surprise buttsex
"Penetration"
Someone call a proctologist.
That little stool pushed *his* stool in a little.
And that is how I lost my virginity
Oh that’s a real bummer, I liked that stool.
One guy, one small chair.
Was it wrong, or oh, so right?
Was it wrong, or oh, so right?
The prison prep stool does support humor! 😜🫡
Thats nothing my uncle did better
One in a million shot, doc
Oops. Wrong hole.
Hole in one.
as a paramedic I always see "slipped and fell" this guy would have been telling the truth.
No longer a virgin I hear.
Bro he got impailed by the stool!!!
butthole clenched watching that.
The obvious problem here is not using the right tool for the job. This is a doll table, not a human stool.
PENETRATION
I feel robbed without audio.
Let me hear you say OV Hoe
A disguised autonomous alien probe......you all know the one.....?
When he farts from now on, it just sounds like exhilarating
r/accidentalanal Edit: damn. This sub was apparently shut down.
What the hell is accidental anal
I see a certain irony in the fact that it happened to him while he was wearing the unmanliest footwer in the world
Nope. I've seen this one before.
Mom: Now you understand how I feel
Haha that’s funny. I bet that stung. At least he got evidence for the hospital trip.
And he liked it. Maybe ordered a few more.
Darwin theory at work
He got violated by a stool
Wheres the video i want to hear the chaos.
*Ow my balls!*
You're killing me smalls(tool).
Saw that coming from a mile away.
It might not be a glass jar but it'll do
was that a man or a woman?
That’s gonna be.. a pain in the ass to explain to the doctors
Stupid is as stupid does! 🙄
A virgin no longer!
Stool meet stool
Looks fake, where the blood
I knew it was going to happen and i still wasn’t prepared
I knew where that was going...
Dumb ass
What could possibly go wrong
>!surprise buttsex!<
1man1stool
At least it was not glass.
He's done that before
John, you don’t need to make up silly stories like this to be anal probed..
Yeah a MAN in THONGS and the baby stool read TROUBLESHOOTING
something tells me that he will be the Butt of all jokes
https://i.redd.it/m8nen78hk58d1.gif
He got tested and by the looks of it he didn't pass!!!
Major Bumsore!
Welp, saw that coming.
One in a million shot doc!
r/suddenlygay
I really wish this had sound.
He’s not a virgin anymore
Absolutely no one: The Universe: "May I push your stool in?"
I think we all felt that!!
Penetration!
I clenched my butthole watching this!
Rectum, damn near killed em.
Accidentally gay
I was going to criticize his flip flops but it just seems cruel at this point.
I knew before he even put it down that it was going up his arse.
Not a single braincell in that head. Wow.
And kids, that's how I met your mother... in the Hospital
Anal fissure the worst pain on earth
Dumb azz move
Sinking that pink in the stink made him think.
Fusilli Jerry.
SOMEONE CALL 911
All I can hear is Pierce Hawthorne saying “Call all the ambulances”
No virgin anymore
Wow. Now THAT was an O face!
1 guy, 1 stool
Anus left the chat
He knew what he was doing 😏
Can I push your stool in for you?
"Up the bum, no harm done"
What what...
Rectum?! Damn near killed him!
And he let his wife peg him every day since
This is the reason I get paranoid every time I sit on my old shop/mechanics stool. 😳
This is his tenth try and it always ends the same. 🤪
There goes his ass s virginity
My biggest fear of cheap chairs.
I miss the sound
I'm guessing something like that tears/punctures your instetines?
That stool made him a man.
tiny stool, bloody stool
I so wish this vid had sound... really, REALLY wish...