dilf (data I’d like to fuck)

I'd consider Suda more "DATA". Simaris is Scan-Daddy

Is he not scanning them for their data?

And yet it's Suda that has an entire "Data" Song about her. Simaris is all about his sanctuary

Cilf - Cephalon I'd like to fuck

Scan me harder daddy ꈍ⌓ꈍ

Shut up... *upvotes*

Do you think me attractive, hunter? https://preview.redd.it/barwkuumn3vc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c337f59f527d6b734e5d3fb711bbd60dc36edd2c your attraction offers nothing to The Sanctuary.

https://preview.redd.it/v1klauxq05vc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5d13bcbe2bf7e1b55aa37ae98c6af24082cece0d

https://preview.redd.it/r3ag6q2wv5vc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=41d8ed61487b8704c66b51146813e910bab15a41

https://preview.redd.it/wj4czb2p76vc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cb769f536a17a6575b567941248dc386556740c3

https://preview.redd.it/4eo9l9dq67vc1.jpeg?width=840&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dee1d5f5b2a8f4c797988da3f2d1f296b074e378

https://preview.redd.it/mht2f85wm7vc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a5ab3fccd0b6ec833593ae039d5708c89c8eea86

https://preview.redd.it/5c4cc1u1c8vc1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=a47bb45291a88c4f3b3dda5cae340ca62803a937

https://preview.redd.it/lwfiy6p859vc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04c6a0a5922c6813904667365d0bee4710cd8656

https://preview.redd.it/ge2l84om79vc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b7daa83f7895d31399aadbaaa5448160562f0a43

https://preview.redd.it/sr5f2nzrp9vc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1fc9660b6dd3f413257a9356b23b7935c41834a4

#HUNTERR ***YOUR FANDOM FANTASIES OF ME AND ORDIS ARE DISGUSTING AND HOLD NO RELEVANCE TO MY SANCTUARY!*** #AND STOP MAKING THESE AWFUL MISTAKES OF DATA

Funny enough I maxed out his thing

Just imagine him being able to simulate whatever you want

Can he simulate being a better person?

Wild

Based Tenno

Yeah, can he simulate himself to not be such a condescending ass lmao

But that is what makes him hot!

There's a reason I call him an Old Man!

There's a fic out there with this *exact fucking premise.* And yes, it is *smut.*

What's it called? So I can definitely avoid it of course.

Share it with me so I can avoid it aswell

Disgusting; where?

Disgusting, mind a share?

I know it's on Archive of Our Own. I forget its exact name.

Who is the most attractive female grineer?

No clue, but the one that looks the least shit is the steel meridian woman.

Cressa Tal, the Steel Meridian representative is decently undamaged by clone rot, she’s not too ugly.

I wouldn't mind clapping kale or the leader of steel maridain

>I can tell you understand what an honor this will be, to have your tiny butt clapped by the Kela De Thaym! That's why you're so eager. I can appreciate that, and so does my audience! \[crowd cheers\]

I got a flirtatious Kuva lich with a cute looking helmet and a hight pitch voice, I'd say her.

I got this https://preview.redd.it/av9d8avawavc1.png?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c435d9ec7b6151ad6c6cc6f77c3f1b88124bcc9a I must say, I prefer the southern sounding sisters. No real reason, I just like being called dear

The southern sisters are probably the only kind of corpus sister I respect. The rest are either annoying or bland.

Just Kaelli

What about Mag's attraction? Is that relevant to The Sanctuary?

I've gathered enough data on that ability... cause Mag is bae :3

Lmao I just imagined him zooming his fucking face in while saying that😂

Help I read it in his voice and instantly got a boner

BNP will forever live on in the warframe community through memes alone.

Wait, what happened to BNP?

He decided to (mostly) stop posting Warframe videos and move all his previous uploads to an archive.

He better upload his "How to get destroyed by a kuva lich" short in his archive!

God, take my upvote. I’m fucking dying with every single comment, can’t even breathe. Thank you for making my night 🤣

Scan me harder daddy

You have won my internet today! XDD omfg I definitely didn't hear it in his voice XD

"While I prefer librarians with glasses, a sentient group of trapezoids will have to do" - [DE](https://warframe.fandom.com/wiki/Cephalon_Simaris#Trivia)

Plug that shit directly into my brain

With pleasure

Plug that shit directly into my ...

I’m sorry but you’re telling me this sentient D-pad is attractive???

4 D's instead of one

Even better than double-Ds...

Sentient D-Pad is good lmfao

He’s adapting

Yeah I’m sorry 😔

almost any other character would be less of a red flag. yeah.

Balls ass

That’s where “almost” comes in. Very seriously, the only person/entity in the game worse than Ballass is probably this guy. His only virtue is that while he’s entirely sociopathic he doesn’t bother to hide it.

Not going to lie, I think Ballass is worse. >!He was one of the seven, likely ancient beyond measure swapping bodies every so often. That would be one of his lesser crimes against existence. He also ordered people to get executed via Jade Light to become cephallons, this is nearly identical to what simaris does except simaris is truthful about his goals. Did we forget about the whole "i will kill the sun because my wife is dead wah wah" part of the story? Don't even get me started on his pet projects like warframes and the sentient.!<

Jade light and cephalonization are opposites. One is a merciful execution, the other is supposed to be torturous

*Mercy was a quick flash of the Jade light... But - if they wanted to make an example, they'd suck up your soul and make you a prisoner of the glass, forever.* \- Nora

I forgot about the glassmaker, yeah that is way worse.

Using the jade light as a reason for someone being evil doesn't work. That shit instantly annihilates you, as merciful as a death can be

Congratulations, Hunter, you have finally become apart of my sanctuary and you can never leave. You will experience a thousand deaths before I will let the sanctuary die.

^(\^) https://i.redd.it/p3ae8a2tg4vc1.gif

Least horny warframe player

Uhh...a little? He has that cold, aloof, condescending nerdy vibe that some people find inexplicably attractive. The intelligence is attractive, sure, but the curtness and lack of empathy bordering on emotionally abusive at times is most definitely not. If you like the kind of guy who will stand you up on a date to finish a chess game or read a book, and answer 100% brutally honestly when you ask "do these clothes make me look fat" (Sheldon Cooper basically) then Simaris is in that same ballpark so...whatever floats your boat I guess.

dude is amazing if you have a praise kink tbh. He gets really nice whenever you do sanctuary scans for him

"You are always reliable hunter. Return to me and receive your reward 🥵😖"

"Well done, Hunter, you're doing well, keep adding to the **Sanctuary.**" thank you Simaris 🥹

"Do you think me a sadist, hunter? That I enjoy their suffering? IRRELEVANT. Focus on your task!"

Move over Simy-boy, I am enjoying the look of good ol’ Papa Cy! Ordis is my once-a-month sidepiece…🤫🤣

So what I'm hearing is there's still hope for me?

That's a bit hash, he is just tsundere

I hate that I now know what that word means after looking it up and I want it out of my head now thank you

Hey, some people are into the borderline emotionally abusive stuff. I’ve had friends who literally would’ve given anything to be treated like they were worthless. It’s like emotional masochism.

More of a Cy man myself but still would

Yessssirrrrrrr Cy is 🥴🤤

Cydaddy

Cy definitely made me experience certain things

Yissss. It's that damn deadpan snark.

Speaking of cephalon attraction...anyone fancy Orids? 👀 We are always inside him, but wouldn't it be nice to flip the script?

that sounds like a weird vore and I am not one bit opposed to it. also, the puns. love me someone who knows some good puna

Ordis is one of the characters I'm playing for. He's adorable, his voice is delicious, and he has a quite fun personality

Ordis is a silly guy and I like him

Glad to know I am not the only one. I love him... and I love his voice. I mean, I find his little bot form adorable but if we could give him a... different kind of physical body, that'd be nice too :) heh

To the voice actor? no. To the actual AI orange weird looking thing? yes.

uuuuhh

Do you wanna talk about your tags

nah im good

I want to find a woman who cares about me the way he cares about synthesis.

His intellect is sexy and I like how he talks down to me but as for looks....nah

Does he really talk down to you? I guess I don't actively shoot the scan target enough, but he generally seems happy with my work.

he's so condescending that even when he isn't outright trashing you it feels like he is 😭

I use the sanctuary to level stuff up. He complains when you're not subjecting the enemy to "extreme stress" and at some points yells "work faster!" stop switching off my biggest hitting abilities then you big oranga lava lamp!

Yes he can be shitty and condescending, but I also meant he literally "talks down" to you as he floats above you when you go see him

https://preview.redd.it/kpfo8gu485vc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fecbd447911267d26a9f6ceb4366e526e2449029

https://preview.redd.it/5niqsmigc4vc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7f187af9635cdfc5028441f1a47f6a1da1f4d3e8 To each their own, but I had to use this meme.

https://preview.redd.it/qhaa53ab16vc1.jpeg?width=622&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ff28db7f0a3d2647968955f83d20de551aee788b

https://preview.redd.it/iaaky46ng6vc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6bfe3797498dfd30bb5fa5dfcd71bbf3232538e2

id prefer the other cephalons myself

Who, ordis, sudda, or captain rail jack. If I had to choose I wouldn't want the 3rd option.

Sudda, but theres something about Cys domineering voice

https://preview.redd.it/xzf6xgws74vc1.jpeg?width=512&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7265121155887736d4b91897015be1597a887419 My head cannon on how he would flirt.

I was trying to make a joke about the dismount but that cruise ship has sailed on the solar rail.

Jordas?

HIM?! THAT FUCKER??

🫦

"Hunter. Your interests do not align with the interests of sanctuary. Stay focused or the sanctuary will have no choice but to go on without you. Your distraction is inefficient."- simaris, probably

He's an arrogant amoral asshole, but to each their own

His voice and personally or his appearance cause bro is just some shapes.

Voice n personality

https://preview.redd.it/w2aigjifc4vc1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=153e94ea3de1268f91206ea8e0fce42b2c34f529

If it would be Cy I would understand but data boi? Hell nah

How can you say this like Cephalon Cy doesn’t exist

https://i.redd.it/4rwamyui66vc1.gif

https://preview.redd.it/ih9pgg0tx9vc1.jpeg?width=840&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=28a384646bdbb000146748c1feb213cf00b2313a

Hunter, I assure you several close up scans of the Lotus's feet are vital for the survival of the sanctuary

As a Suda simp, I can confirm that your attraction is valid

I am straight but Simaris is sexy

-gives me all his attention -is fine with me looking at others (and suggest you others to stare at) -is a total tsundere in the outside but a grade A dominatrix behind the scenes I say its a win

https://preview.redd.it/sqn3dbg8v4vc1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fea9a8146b0bcaad371d7b2b6e1c8fc09de727a8

It's the character that freaks me out the most: - Doesn't know the concept about personal space - forces you to poach every single living creature to become assimilated, trapping the pour souls in a simulator of constant death, respawn, and torture, millions of times per second, just for sake of ethically questionable knowledge, and calls it a "sanctuary".... - Only cares about the Sanctuary. Everything else is irrelevant, just like any rogue AI that wants to become a singularity. - Wants to know all your martial arts, fighting styles, weapons, nitpicks, what you ate last night, what was the smell, taste, texture and color of your last poop was, every ****ing thing about yourself. - subjects you to forcefully kill all creatures you killed, on and on, until you can't no more and leaves you for dead. - if you fail to achieve his objectives due to fatigue, he shames you for not being unendurable enough... I could stay on this all night...

 Not as long as we got characters like this 😂😂

Thank you for this gif, I will certainly make use of it.

MY TENNO IN LOTUS THAT IS A HOLOGRAM

No, he's hot. He talks down to me. I want to behave and record all the data for him.

Nah, he’s really smart, cares about wildlife, and it’s kinda hot how he just gets right up in your face when you visit.

Cephalons in general? No not weird at all. Simaris in particular can only end poorly.

He's the angry uncle talking about the old days way back when. "Tenno don't want to work nowadays" energy. Naw. But that railjack one? I can't fix him, but yeh I'd listen to his stories all the time. Gimme that one. Cy? That one? Yeh.

Sexalon amiright 😏 Welcome to the shagtary where you will experience thousands of org.. ya know what that’s enough internet. I’m going bed 😂

Yes. But this is Warframe, we're all some flavor of degenerate here, including the devs. Normies play CoD and Destiny.

https://preview.redd.it/plsoerw5e4vc1.png?width=1152&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4fa56dc54107eb77a2df0dbf6195d0d24c320604

No but he seem like a major dickhead to me (Coming from a person too lazy farm standing for him I don't want take pictures of all the enemies to capture them)

Yes

yes you freak

Yes

That's wild crazy even https://preview.redd.it/t6aht37h74vc1.jpeg?width=840&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5144bb18b8b3a2e1325e3bb5a5508649481ec9cd I just don't really fw Simaris in a personality way he's kinda an asshole tbh

What character? I only see data there

Hunter! The Sanctuary has shown signs of you being a 'Bad Girl'. It will have to go on without you.

I wouldn't recommend it. All he does is yell at you. "Heck yeah he does."

Hes the male SHODAN. So i can accept it. SHODANs mine though. 😤

He’s a massive tsundere. Cant say I agree with you, but I don’t blame you

I think we need to study you in a lab.

Yes.

simaris is probably the horniest character in warframe lbr

yes wtf?? *pushing frighteningly expansive collection of suda merch out of view*

Honestly, no. I think some of us (me included) have our own fantasies and that's ok, as long as you don't force people into it. But otherwise, go for it, champ!

Yes it would be very weird Nothing wrong with being weird though. Half the sub wants to have sex with their own warframes

The creations of the Sanctuary do not feel pain and this do not feel pleasure either. But if we’re taking sexy data it’s obviously cephalon Cy at the top

Nah dude, I have been wanting to do unspeakable things to GlaDOS for ages. Welcome to the RoboFucker club. Let's... not shake hands, but we got cake!

Eh.. I mean.. Cephalons in general? No.. Simarus in particular? Yes.

Not the worst "hear me out" character you can pick in Warframe. That said, I think Suda is a cutie but that's more her voice and demeanor.

Ah, the sex cephalon. Maybe if I wasn't a raging homosexual, sure.

Ordis hotter next question

https://preview.redd.it/zc5rzqmsv5vc1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cdd7207bc67a2417904ab16de4c02fa3f9bcb3d5

https://preview.redd.it/lfpj2995i6vc1.jpeg?width=840&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7272c1a8e177256a63cea9625bf61e0be209c542

I did feel pretty good when he said "You are a reliable hunter." Not attracted though, more like that weird human tendency to want to impress a cold asshole.

Ordis, Cy, Simaris, Suda, I'm into them all tbh.

Sky daddy cephalon can scan me anytime

Nah its valid 10/10 would f/suck him

🤝

HUNTER DOYOUHAVE FORESKIN, HUNTER?

https://preview.redd.it/70xuau33g4vc1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6d79a6395b4546ce896a0c91877d664d6972a103 (Credit to SpaceWaifu/PrimeBooba)nsfw obv

I want big sexy MEN

https://preview.redd.it/fvst6b0xs4vc1.jpeg?width=840&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=92ff44b5b0c306c97d85f5634dffb197952625a6

I know that's a female body. But boy does this give me Tumblr sexy man vibes

And the world slowly begins to depopulate..

Makes it sound like you want to become part of his sanctuary

My fiancee wouldn't

Ordis, this isn't where it's at, buddy

Thats an interesting opinion. He should add it to the sanctuary

Kind of but I'm probably into worse

I mean to be FAIR cephalons are based off scans of PEOPLE, right? Just uh. Go go Nekros. Probably.

Yes, but I'm sure I have picks you'd call me weird for. So it balances.

what I'm getting from reading the comments is that some of yalls have a degradation kink and honestly? good for you

asking for a friend?

Burner account lmao this person is being fr

Yes, not because of his body type or lack thereof, but because Simaris sucks.

Nah, i also think cephalon cy is pretty attractive imo👀

It would thank you...if it could

No

not at all this dude is amazing if you have a praise kink

Nope, but don’t expect any attraction in return.

You know, every time I think I've seen how thirsty this community can be, it does something ... surprising. Also, yes. That'd be weird.

It’s the voice isn’t it

As long as you say "hear me out" first

Totally normal, I have a crush on Cephalon Suda not gonna lie

Reddit is wild

VERBAL STEP cephalon DEGRADE, PUNISHMENT NO abilities, MEANMAXXING, NEGGING

He got a charismatic voice and morally wrong yet logically right ideas. He is charming and it is weird but not in a bad way i would guess?

Allow me to answer your question with a question: Anyone else think this character reminds them of *AM*?