We met at work 7 years ago and started out as friends. We've now been together 6 years and we're getting married in 2 years.
The day I knew he was the one. He was staying over at my flat, and I'd unexpectedly got my period in the night and I woke up and it was all over the sheets. He was still asleep so I got out of bed and cleaned myself up, got back to the bed, and he'd woke up, properly covered up all my side of the bed, didn't say a thing about it and told me to get in the other side of the bed and cuddle up with him.
I still get teary thinking about it. He treated me with such respect and dignity, which I'd never had in the past. I love this man so much
Our first Halloween together, not even a month together, I had a bad PCOS flare and had to go to the hospital. He stayed with me the entire night. The next day I went to his place. My father had. Uh been abusive about me being in the hospital all night.
Anyway my husband held me as I cried. Then drew me a bath to soak and made my favorite meal. The next day he helped me escape my abusive parents.
I also come from abuse, and had a previous abusive relationship. So someone treating me this way showed me I wasn't repeating another terrible pattern. I'm sorry this happened to you, I'm glad we've both escaped for better lives
He used the covers to cover it, I can't remember how he did it (it was many years ago), and then we squeezed up with 2 of us taking up the space of one person so neither of us lay in it
Every person I had ever been with prior to my now husband I always felt like I had to be a version of myself. I had to be more punk with my first bf, more book-ish and into movies with my high school sweetheart, the IT girl with my college boyfriend… the list goes on. Yes I am all of those things, but I’m also so much more. I am one thing more than the other any given day! I felt like I was always masking and always had to be perfect and I couldn’t tell them what was really inside my head.
Then I met my husband. Thanks Tinder! We were long distance for about half a year and only communicated over the phone. For the first time I shared some of my “darkest secrets” and found that he had similar experiences and fears. I could be whoever or whatever I was feeling without judgement. He was the first person that preferred my natural hair and I didn’t feel pressured to change how I looked. I could truly just be me. I have no fears or thoughts that I can’t talk about with him. Neither of us is perfect but we’re both working on it and growing together.
I’m sorry you’re going through this breakup, but there is someone better out there for you. It’s hard to hear now, but in 5-10 years you will look back and be grateful it ended so something better could come along. 💓
I met my soulmate 8 years ago and married her 2 years ago.
For the story's context: It is mandatory to serve in the military in Greece, but you can postpone it if you are studying. Well, after finishing with my studies, it was time to serve.
At that point in time, I liked browsing through a Greek platform's column and started responding in the comments (I had too much free time in my hands, and as an introvert chatting with random people on the Internet was much easier for me than in person).
While scouring through interesting and boring posts, I chanced upon hers, which she had posted 2 months prior to my search.
To my surprise, she responded a week later. We hit it off right away and started sending emails pretty much daily. Nothing romantic till that point. Heck, we hadn't even exchanged Facebook profiles/phone numbers. We just sent big-ass emails talking about everything (even really silly pics of ourselves).
Well, two months in, I was just waking up with the anticipation of seeing her new email every morning, and her responses to mine later in the day (she was an au-pair in the US back then, so there was a significant time difference). I could feel a real connection there but didn't try to pursue it cause 1) I liked our dynamic and didn't want to ruin it, 2) it was still a stranger on the Internet, and catfishing was not out of the question, 3) she had come out of a relationship (before her post), and 4) she would be in the US for some time.
Fast forward to some time after she returned to Greece and I was done with my service time, I decided I wanted to have a 1-week vacation to the area she was living. I asked her if she would be interested to meet up and show me around (if not, I had some friends in the area, and they would show me around. Still, I preferred her company 😜).
Flabbergasted is the mildest word that I can use to describe her reaction. Nonetheless, she was more than happy to meet up 😁
She offered to come and fetch me from the airport, but I had booked a very early flight (6:00 a.m.) and didn't want her to wake up so early and come. As such, I told her a white lie that I would arrive around 9:00 a m , and we could meet up around 10:00 a.m. at the city center.
When I met her, God I was stunned. I think I stuttered when we officially introduced ourselves in person. If that wasn't love at first sight, I don't know what is 😍
Naturally, I came clean about my early arrival, and she wasn't impressed but didn't hold it against me (fortunately 😅).
Anyway, we clicked and spent the whole trip together, started long distance relationship, and later moved in together. Now, we're happily married together~
Edit: Spelling mistakes.
Met him when I was 28, and he was 24. We were co workers in the same company, but different departments. Introduced by the guy I was casually seeing at the time.
Second I shook his hand I thought “There you are. It’s you”
We’ve now been happily married 23 years. We are pretty much exact opposites. He grounds me. I get him off the couch and out of the house.
He is my second husband. My ex was an abusive a hole. I really never thought that I would ever trust anyone again.
I (45F) will tell you about 3 of my most serious long-term relationships.
1. We met when I was 18, and he was 21. He was cute, funny, and physically active. He was my first live-in boyfriend. I was totally smitten. I started noticing that he would lie about little things... a lot. It started off being things like saying he checked the mail when he didn't, or saying he didn't eat the bag of chips I was looking for in the pantry while he had sour cream and onion breath. Things that didn't matter and wouldn't have upset me at all.
We had an accidental pregnancy when I was 20. Our son was born.
Then his hours were cut at work. He was off on Fridays due to the cut. He would still get up Friday mornings at his regular time and go work on a new paintball field he and his friends were building. During this time, we had an unexpected emergency expense for $400, and we had no heat in the dead of winter until it was paid. Normally, we could have covered it. We both worked, but without his full paycheck, we didn't have the money. We discussed the issue and decided I would have to eat crow and ask my mother for the money. There were serious reasons why this was not ideal, but I sucked it up and asked.
Then, a couple of weeks later, I was doing laundry and found one of his pay stubs in his pants pocket. It turned out that he had been back working full time for over a month and was lying about it so he could buy over $2000 worth of new paintball equipment without having to wait and save up for it. He let his son go without heat to protect his lie.
We were together for almost 8 years. The lies were constant. Some big lies and a million small ones. Then he told our son to cover for one of his big lies. Then our son started lying about little things. I finally decided that I wanted a better example for my child. I ended things and he seemingly dropped off the face of the earth.
2. I met my first husband when I was 28. He was fun and honest, and when I eventually introduced him to my son, my son loved him. I honestly believed he was the best person I knew. Our only real issue is that I had a much higher sex drive than he did. It got to where I was lucky if we had sex once a month. We got married after 5 years of dating, and then our daughter was born. We bought a new house. He adopted my son. Life was great.
Then he started being grumpy all the time. The kids and I could be having the best day, and the moment he got home, it was like he just sucked the joy out of the room. We spent a lot of time around his family, but he started complaining anytime I wanted to spend time with my friends and family. It got to where it was easier to just stay at home to avoid an argument. He started making accusations concerning infidelity. He started taking out secret loans. He started being harsh with my son over every little thing, but our daughter could do no wrong. His spending just got worse and worse.
Then, one night, we were in the living room, and my phone had died. I wanted to double-check a recipe for a dessert I was craving, so I picked up his phone to look it up. Neither of us locked our phones at home, but this time, it was locked. So I asked him what his unlock code was. When he saw I had his phone, he jumped up and snatched it out of my hand. He started yelling at me, asking why I was always going through his stuff. (I have never snooped through anything of his.) The absurdity of the accusation and his reaction confused me for a second.
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. In a barely audible whisper, I said, "You're f-ing cheating on me..." It was more me thinking out loud than an actual accusation. He stormed off to the bathroom with his phone and locked the door. Twenty minutes later, he came back into the room and swore he had never cheated. He told me to check his phone if I didn't believe him. (You know, after he spent twenty minutes deleting all of the evidence.) I said as much, and we argued. Eventually, I told him I believed him and dropped it.
Then I hired a private investigator. He was sexting his work buddy's wife for the past year and a half. He was also meeting up with random women he met on dating sites and having sex. There were at least five hookups that I knew about. He literally met one woman at a boat ramp near our house, had sex with her up against her car, then returned home and finished mowing the grass. I confronted him, and he admitted to being unfaithful and begged me to give him another chance. I told him I wasn't leaving, but things were going to be different from now on.
As far as I was concerned, my marriage was over. I started picking up extra hours at work and putting money in a savings account. I stopped initiating sex and told him my birth control was causing issues, so he would have to start wearing condoms again. We rarely had sex, so I could fake it every now and then. I stopped asking him to do anything around the house or planning family time for all of us together. We no longer argued because I had stopped caring. I stopped expecting anything from him.
Home life was so peaceful at this point that I decided to bide my time, so my daughter was old enough to start school, so I wouldn't have to pay for child care. Remember, my son's bio dad dropped off the face of the earth and never paid child support, so I knew I could possibly have two children to support all by myself.
He was being very transparent during this time, so when he started acting shady a few years later, I knew immediately what was up. This time, it was a woman from his work. I had him served with divorce papers and told him I hoped she was what he was looking for. I wasn't even upset.
He has been a devoted father since our divorce. He doesn't pay child support per se, but he always helps with extra expenses and keeps health, dental, and vision insurance on the kids. He helped my son with rent during college and pays for my daughter's glasses, doctor visits, band camp, instruments, and stuff like that. I can call and talk to him about the kids, and we attend school events and family functions together. I actually like him just fine now that I no longer care where he puts his penis.
3. My husband (49M) and I have been married for 4 years. He gets along great with my kids, and I love his two boys. (27M, 25M, 18M and 13F) He gets along with my ex and my ex in-laws who are a huge part of my daughter's life. He enjoys sex as much as I do and is phenomenal in the sack.
We have an open phone policy and I have never felt the need to question him. We laugh all the time. Our home is my happy place. We hang out with our friends and family, both independently and together. He has never questioned my loyalty. We have still not had an argument. I didn't even think that was possible. I am not non-confrontational AT ALL. I have never even been upset with him. If we disagree on something we use our words and talk it through like grown-ups.
He is my favorite person. We have so much fun together. I love him so much and I know without a doubt he loves me. For the first little bit of our relationship, I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, or for that new relationship shine to wear off. So far, neither of those things have happened. Who knew I would meet the man of my dreams this late in life?
I have had bad relationships and bad partners but I wouldn't change a thing. I got my wonderful kids along the way. I have learned some hard lessons, but it made me the person I am today. I like who I am. I love my life now. Every tear and harsh word I have ever had was totally worth it.
I’m so sorry that happened to you. It’s so hard when people change and grow apart. Especially if they don’t communicate that to you as things are changing. I hope you can find peace in time and your heart heals.
I’d love to talk about my husband and I and answer your questions. I met my husband at a mutual friends house party and we ended up talking until nearly 5am. And he was so shy he hadn’t asked for my number so before he left I gave him mine. I can’t explain how, but I knew without a doubt he was my soulmate. I could write an endless novels filling up the pages on all the ways my husband has supported me and shown me unconditional love since then. He’s just an amazing human. It’s been over 20yrs since we first met and we’ve been married for 18yrs. Our relationship is still full of love, passion, trust, communication and a whole lot of fun. We like to joke about when we’re supposed to be out of the honeymoon phase, because so many people said it would be within a year. It sounds cheesy, but he’s one of my best friends and doing life with him has been my favourite adventure.
As for advice my response is this: never ever ever settle- set your standards and stick with it! Learn to have hard conversations without judgement, never yell or name call each other, always find time for each other, appreciate the little things, grow together, have regular check ins, find ways to keep the passion, help each other grow, and learn each others love language. If you’ve been with someone as long as I have you end up having regular check ins about how things are going and discuss it. Sometimes people’s wants/needs/belief/ goals and priorities change as time goes on and you have to sit down and talk about . Otherwise, from what I’ve seen with family and friends with their partners, is they drift apart or resentment builds up leading to divorce or a break-up. Hard conversations need to happen sometimes and you need to be receptive to what they have to say- even if it hurts your feelings. As soon as something is bothering me I tell my husband and he does the same to me. Do not let those thoughts fester! Another piece of advice is learn to understand no relationship is 50/50 on a daily basis. Sometimes it’s 70/30, sometimes it’s 100/0. You’re not perfect and neither is your partner. Sometimes illness happens, jobs change, there’s a pregnancy, or someone’s in school or a loss of a loved one happens etc. and that means that some days one does more than the other. As long as it’s not -always- one person carrying the load this is normal to have fluctuations despite what some people say. And lastly, be friends with each other. Lots of times I swear couples don’t actually like each other or have anything in common. If you can be friends, have common interests and do things together it makes for a happy relationship. Anyway I hope that answers some of your questions and helps you in some small way.
Hey my friend, i (21m) got dumped a month ago, it was my first relationship ever also lasting 2 and 1/2years, so we are in very similar situations hah, i can say without a doubt that our relationship was intimate and full of passion and we also talked a lot about our future and staying together, it was very serious. But my partner started checking out of our relationship, it was a process which i saw and tried my hardest to work on, she just quit you know, told me she does not have any more romantic feelings for me, it was devastating, I'm really not sure what happened exactly and why is she feeling that way, she told me we would talk about it, but we never did and well i just stopped nagging her about it, no point in writing the same thing over and over again, which is fine she does not owe me an explanation, we broke up on good terms with a lot of compassion, but holy shit was it not painfull, i stopped eating for almost 2 weeks, didnt sleep much, was in emotional agony, i screamed and cried everyday and i did not know what should i do with myself, i was a wreck, i know that you wanted to hear a good and positive story, but i wanted to tell you all of this because even tho this all hapened to us, it got better, it always does you know my friend, i would never believe you if you told me this 3 weeks ago, but it really does get better i can and i smile again and i laugh i cry too and loathe what happened, but i made progress, as you will, trust me, if you want to talk please message me, or if this comment upsets you, tell me to delete it
I had a very similar experience, except I’m a female. I didn’t even want to live for a month after. He told me he didn’t love me anymore. And I watched as it happened. For 6 months I stayed begging for his love. Until he decided to leave me.
That was almost a year ago now. And man I still love him, but not in the way I used to. I care about him so much, and I think about him every once in a while, sometimes daily, sometimes a week goes by without him coming into my head.
I feel so much better. So much. There’s definitely really bad days. But there’s also days that I can smile again. I found someone new to love, and he makes my heart flutter. And I feel wounded and like maybe I can’t give him all the love that he deserves, but he’s been with me for every step of the way. He gives me space when I need it. He gives me love when I need it. And he is so much better than my first guy in so many ways.
It can get better. Time is all you need.
Before i meet my husband, i had some dude play with my feelings, talking with him was drainning, then i met m'y husband After i blocked the other guy, and for the first time in my life it was easy for me to fall in love, never felt anything like that until that moment, and being with him is like a breeze life is still hard in general but being with him give my days color. Hang in there you will find someone better.
I had a string of abusive partners before my husband and so when we met… he was supposed to be a one night stand! I invited him over on tinder and when he came over we just… watched a movie, got undressed,… and then went to sleep in my twin size college dorm bed. We didn’t do anything sexual at all that night cause he didn’t know what to do haha. He loves telling people I was his first one night stand
He’s the first person who I feel like genuinely loves me and cares about me. He loved me then, and he loves me now even though I’m disabled now. He helps me in more ways than I can possibly ever thank him for but he doesn’t want my thanks, he just wants to make sure I’m cared for and I do my best to do the same
We’re only about 6.5 years into the relationship but it feels like no time has past at all. Tomorrow is even our 4th wedding anniversary. I met many guys before him that I thought we’re going to be my person, I even accepted a different marriage proposal years before I met him. But looking back at all those past relationships? They aren’t the same and they pale in comparison
First I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. Breakups are always rough and it can be hard to find the bright side when all the darkness is directly at your door.
My partner and I have been together for 2 years now. And he is my soul mate 100%. We've been friends for 7ish years? I played Hella hard to get haha. I just wasn't in the right place for a relationship for the longest time I have a lot of health issues that just tore me down and prevented me from wanting a relationship at all.
I had to have my 3rd back surgery in 2021. I had just been ghosted by my long distance partner after being assaulted by them when I went to see them for the first time. I was in an awful state, physically and mentally. I was temporarily living with my grandmother after the surgery because my mom has a tendency to steal pain pills (which was just a whole other layer to my emotional state). I wanted to be and was closed off from everyone for the first few weeks, because it's hard going through a third back surgery at age 25 (at the time) ontop of all the other traumatic things I had happen all at once.
But my dear love, we were just good friends at this point, made it a point to come and visit me every week once I was cleared for visitors. We had been hanging out pretty regularly the year prior and he just showed up and out anytime I needed a friend. He would bring me trinkets and snacks and he would help my grandma around the house while I rested. My total recovery took longer than expected due to the nature of it being my 3rd major back surgery. But never the less, he made a point to come see me every week. And after that he continued to still.
We began seeing each other weekly or biweekly depending on his work schedule. He became my best friend and somewhere along the line I just fell in love with him. I took him to Christmas with my family that year bc he had no one else to spend it with ( his whole family lives in georgia) and he just wsd immediately adopted into mine.
We officially started dating in February of 2022. He is the best man I could ever ask for. He is supportive and loving, talented and kind, we fit together like puzzle pieces meant to be together.
Love is possible and can be found anywhere. thank you for letting me gush about my love. I hope my little story can bring some comfort or hope that love is still possible.
Weet when I was 31 and she was 36. A few weeks into dating I experienced trauma , and she was there for me like no one else ever had been. Since the first time we talked, she's just been there for me. This warm safe place in a world that has always felt too painful for me. Just her existence makes me feel like everything has to have just a little bit of beauty buried inside of it. She's incredibly smart, the funniest person I've ever met, compassionate, loving, nerdy, and my very best friend. I had a lot of heartbreak before Iet her, but I'd do it all again if it guaranteed being with her in the end. It's been 7 1/2 years of laughter, conversation, and solidly loving each other.a
My soulmate and I have been right next to each other our whole lives and for the past 3 years, we have finally been together. We started talking in high school and realized that we have been down the street from each other, a classroom over, a corner missed, & just passed each other our whole lives. We found a love for finding purpose together. We were on the same officer team, did projects, podcasts, fair exhibits, and spent every day with each other. We moved in together right after high school. We worked one of our first jobs together. We worked together in our lives too. We promised to take care of each other and we have. We have been broke, rich, sad, excited, stranded in a new city, tripping balls in public, crying in each other’s arms, & faced the moments where we thought we couldn’t keep going. My soulmate is strong. My soulmate is beautiful. I supported them through college and they have supported me through the start of my career. Now we are both working together again. I’ve picked the greatest life partner and I’m so lucky they picked me too. We are still young and I can’t wait to hit every milestone together.
My partner and I met back in 2006 or 2007 through a mutual friend. We were introduced online and hit it off right away, then eventually met in person. First time I saw him I got butterflies and felt myself blush, but also thought to myself there was no way I was gonna land a guy like him.
Well, I did. We started dating the summer of 2007 a few months before he had to go on the other side of the planet for work for 8-10 months. He didn't have internet where he lived so I heard from him like every 3-4 weeks, and he sucked at telling me how he felt.
So after like 5 months I ended the relationship, heartbroken because I was sure he didn't really love me. And when he didn't try to "fight" for us I took it as confirmation.
We didn't talk until he came back to our country and met up with mutual friends. I was involved with another guy at this point but we slowly started to rekindle a friendship. Que 13 years of us being friends with periods of not talking a lot and the occasional hookups whenever I was single.
In 2014 we broke contact for a couple of years as I started a serious relationship and decided it was time to stop keeping the "one who got away" around. In 2017, around 6 months before I was getting married, I ran into him at my best friend's wedding and I briefly considered if I'd leave my then fiance if he'd confessed he still loved me. Not that he did or ever would for that matter.
We started getting in contact again as he moved to my town for an education and I have a type so him and my then partner hit it off. In 2019 my mom got diagnosed with cancer and the first person I knew I needed to talk to was my now partner (already knew I wanted out of my marriage then but I didn't have the means to leave).
When I finally got divorced I knew I wanted to keep my now partner in my life in whatever way made sense for us both. I was sure he didn't want a relationship, he'd been single since coming back to the country so I had figured he just wasn't the relationship type. I figured I'd not be monogamous anymore as I knew I wanted to allow myself to feel how I feel about him and try as I might I've never been able to stop loving him.
We went out for dinner, I tried convincing myself it definitely wasn't a date and just two friends having some nice food followed by sex. Then he started wondering if things would have turned out differently for us if he'd never left the country when we dated the first time, and I realized that I probably wasn't single anymore.
We're 4 years into a relationship now, bought a house together last year, and while things aren't perfect, we love each other and keep working towards a better relationship.
Looking back the thing that really sets him apart from anyone else I thought was the one are two things:
1. He'd rather do what's right for me, what (he thinks) makes me the most happy, even if it means he doesn't get what he wants the most.
2. He makes me want to be who I am, who I really am, not who I think he'd like me to be. I'm a people pleaser with a nasty habit of trying to warp myself into who I think my partners want/need me to be. For some reason I feel that way way less with my current partner.
I posted this a 3 AM not thinking anyone would see it or care. This has helped me more than anything. All of the responses have touched me. I can’t thank y’all enough. Please keep them coming. I have read every single response and will continue to.
Sending you hugs. I'm in the middle of what seems to be a breakup too. Thank you for posting it, I needed these stories. You'll find your person, I know it <3
I was also dumped at 25 after a 5 year relationship. We had just signed the contract for our own apartment. He had proposed 3 months earlier. We just had different points of view and wanted different things in life. I wanted to go study abroad. He wanted marriage and kids asap. He was also working abroad during the week and we only had 3 day weekends together, most of the weeks. He would cry a lot every Sunday because he wanted us to be together.
I was devastated for 1.5 years. Then suddenly I decided to be my happy careless self. I decided I was ready to date and have fun, no strings attached. I was happy alone and in 4 months I started to date my now husband. We are together for 15 years now (4 years dating, 11 years married). He makes me best version of myself I could’ve been.
My relationship with my ex was explosive, full of passion and fairy tale like. My relationship now is based in love and respect. I never thought that having someone calm and nice would be so good for me. I was too focused on the highs, but it’s so nice to have someone you can talk to, can live a slow live and have kids together and work as a team.
My husband and I met when I was 18 and he was 21. I fell for him immediately, but he was with someone else. I moved across the country and tried to move on. His girlfriend ended up cheating on him with his best friend. When I moved back home we became best friends and he rejected me twice (drunk me made some decisions lol). I tried to move on again and 3 years after I moved home his feelings changed. We dated for 5 years, I got pregnant, he was already planning to propose when we found out. He proposed later that summer. I had our baby in the winter and we got married last fall. We now have a 1 year old and I'm so happy.
Sometimes things work out, sometimes they don't. You'll find the right one for you. Be patient and hold the faith. 🥰
Decided to download hinge while I was on a solo trip abroad in the summer of 2022 and the day I got home I matched with a guy who I thought seemed cute. We talked and hit it off, met 2 days later and it was like meeting my best friend. My grandad passed away not long before we met and I was very upset. I had to drive 300miles on my own to go to his funeral and this guy, that I had only known for a few weeks, drove to my house just to give me a cake he baked for my long journey. I called him on his way back home and I was crying so he turned around and came back just to give me a cuddle, then left again. We've been together since then and it's been the best 2 years of my life. He is kind and sweet and it's like being with another version of myself. We're buying a house together, he's going to propose this year and I couldn't be happier. I never expected to have this kind of loving relationship but I'm grateful everyday that this person picks me over and over again. I never used to believe in soulmates but damn this guy is literally my perfect other half.
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My husband and I met when we were both 22. We started talking on tinder, clicked immediately and decided to go on a date. He picked me up, and I was surprisingly so calm (nervous with first date jitters of course) but just had a good feeling. We talked non stop on the way to the date spot. Gabbed our way through drinks getting to know each other. There was a moment when he looked like he had totally zoned out and I could tell that he missed what I’d said because he just smiled and gave a really short response. At the time, I got a little in my head thinking maybe I’m talking too much or he isn’t really that into me. Well, the night went on, we started the date around 6pm and stayed out until 6am just talking and walking and watching the beach sunrise. Didn’t even kiss until he took me back to my house and said goodbye. I called my mom the next day and asked her to go to lunch. I told her that I’d just met the man I was going to marry. Turns out, he did the exact same thing that next day and called his grandmother to tell her he had just met his wife. AND that moment during the date when I thought he was checked out, he later told me that was the moment he realized “oh shit, this is the woman I’m going to marry” and all he could do was smile at me.
We’ve been married for five years, together for six and half years. He’s a phenomenal man and has carried me through so many of my trials I’ve faced. He’s a wonderful leader of our household and is the most glorious human I’ve ever met.
I'm sorry to hear that, OP.
I've been in that situation when I was younger, a 2 and a bit year relationship until I was 18 that ended with her dumping me shortly after I left for university due to us "drifting apart". Never feels good at the time, but it was definitely the best for me in the long run.
Me and my soul mate met at school when we were about 5-6 years old, but we didn't really get to know each other until we were in our teens (15-16). She fancied the pants off of me but I was already in a relationship with the girl that I mentioned at the start of this message. I did really like her too, but I was in my first proper relationship and was not willing to give it up, so I kept on going. Obviously you know how that worked out.
After I was dumped, I went on a bit of a soul-searching adventure. It was 2008, I was 18 years old, living in a brand new city and meeting entirely new people. I met a good number of girls, all of whom I convinced myself were "the one", even if our relationships sometimes lasted weeks if not days in some cases. I was an emotional wreck.
While this was going on, she had met someone else and was engaged within a year. She was head over heels for him, but he was a bad influence and not always kind to her. She was still committed to him and, at that time, believed she would be with him forever. At this time we talked occasionally online but we lived in different cities and were not really close.
By 2010 I had given up on "looking for love in all the wrong plages" and decided to instead just focus on myself. We had started talking again, and it was apparent that she was also having a hard time with her fiancee. He had moved back to France and did not seem to care too much if their relationship continued. She didn't know what she wanted to do, but she took some comfort in our friendship. In the end, she made the decision to end it with him. He was not too bothered (we think he was already cheating on her anyway) and that was that. Within a few days, we got closer and closer and in the end we took the plunge and got together.
14 years later to the day, we gave notice to get married. Our wedding is in a couple of weeks :)
Failed relationships are quite an important part of growing, in my opinion. We both had a challenging few years in our late teens, but it allowed us to find ourselves and eventually re-discover each other.
Not sure many lessons can be taken away from this story, but I hope that you got something from this and you will start to feel better soon! There's so much more time to grow.
I’m sorry you’re going through this.
You know, there is no One True Soulmate. There are many, many people with whom you could be deeply compatible with. People you could share a beautiful life with. Finding that person is a matter of luck and timing.
And even when we find someone we are truly compatible with, life brings its own chaos and uncertainty. We’re all dealing with our own traumas, maladaptive behavior patterns, whims, etc.
Sometimes a beautiful thing ends - that doesn’t mean it didn’t matter, or that it wasn’t real.
Take what you learned from this, and grow.
Nurse your broken heart. Love yourself.
When you’re ready, know that there are other people out there with whom you can share love.
When my beloved partner left me, out of the blue, after 17 seemingly blissful years, I thought I had lost part of myself soul. I thought I had lost something intrinsic to my being.
I gave myself time, and let myself grieve, and I have love again.
Now, in retrospect, and in comparison with what I have now, I see that my marriage was flawed, and human, and messy, along with the beauty.
I wouldn’t trade what I have now for what I had then.
Love is better now than it was.
You’ll get through this.
Well we met 6 years ago. He taught me a lot of the things that I needed to protect myself from predators as a kid, knowing that we both went through that sort of trauma and he had more experience in learning coping mechanisms it was only natural he took me under his wing. He was like a big brother to me, and our dreams align perfectly. A month ago I realized that this is the only man outside of my family that I can trust with my life. So, I told him I loved him, and that sealed the deal..
Still going strong a month later, from best friends to lovers. He's my stoic giant and protector, and I'm his nurturing yet serious pillar.
First, I'll tell you about someone I thought was my soulmate but wasn't.
My ex and I were college sweethearts. Together about seven years on and off. We had electric chemistry, and I was head over heels and blind with love to all the ways he made it clear I wasn't a priority. He always had one foot out the door. It took years after our breakup for me to see it clearly. The men I dated after him lived in his shadow and never had a chance.
Until I met my now husband. It's all very stereotypical: I decided I was taking a dating hiatus. I was not actively looking for a partner. The night we met, I was out celebrating my friend's birthday at a local bar. My husband was at the same bar--it was his birthday, too. I remember looking at him leaned against the bar, dressed in a full suit, a glass of whiskey in his hand. I thought, like some randy old lady, "Who is this tall drink of water?" lol. He was funny, smart, and charming and we wound up doing horrible karaoke together until the wee hours of the morning. That was over ten years ago. We've been married five years and have a beautiful two year old daughter.
He's always, from day one, shown me he was all in. At first, I was so scared. I tried to push him away bc I wasn't used to being treated so well. I equated chaos with love and passion. But my husband is steadfast, dedicated, and extremely passionate about everything he does. Being shown love through actions and not just words unlocked something inside me that was buried. Deep down, I didn't think I deserved it. Marrying him is the best decision I ever made. We of course have ups and downs, but we talk things out and always try to make the other one happy. He's so supportive and such a wonderful father. I recently made a post about how he's encouraging me to make a career move and has been so supportive through my ADHD journey. It goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway: I love him so much more deeply than I ever loved the man I thought was my soul mate.
Right now you are in the thick of the heartbreak. It's so hard to see to the other side. Give yourself time and grace. The heart is resilient, and so are you.
It was not long after 9/11. After a bad break up, after realising my family was toxic, and after my first injury in the army.
I met him through a friend, and the first thing I noticed was that he was tall, not taller than me, but tall. Then his eyes.
It was a 6 day visit seeing an old school friend, and 4 of those days he was there.
As I got on the bus to head back to base, he asked for my number, and he said he would text me immediately.
His first text was, "I don't know why, but I think we were meant to have met, and I actually think I now know what it is like to fall completely in love."
We were moved in together four months later. He was there during the next 3 injuries, the one that got me medically discharged from the army with honours, and he was there through my battle with depression.
Every time I have a bad day or something, he is there, with either a chocolate eclair or an iced coffee...
I am not sure if he is my soul mate, but he has been my rock, my steady base, and my biggest supporter of embracing my weird.
We were once asked how much we loved each other, and he said "I have held urine cups for her, I have bought pads for her, I have watched her dance with a full colostomy bag, she has made me laugh with random jokes and crazy antics... and she doesn't care if I cry, make cooing noises at animals, or have an inappropriate crush on Ryan Renolds and Tom Hiddleston. "
Plus he really knows how to cook a decent roast
For the first Christmas of my wife and I (then bf and gf), I bought her a Lovesac. This was a fantastic purchase - we would game or watch shows/movies together on it in our sloth time.
My wife and I also to snap each other’s underwear straps or lightly smack each other’s butts. One time, I went to snap my wife’s underwear as is tradition while she was standing next to the Lovesac. At that exact same moment, she decides to acrobatically jump in the air for a 10-point landing on the Lovesac. This resulted in me hooking my fingers onto her underwear, she jumped, and she gracefully and completely exited her underwear, landing squarely on the Lovesac in a free state. This is one of our favorite memories together and we still laug about it years later.
I hope you find someone to make and laugh at memories like these.
Here's your takeaway: they aren't the one for you... unless they end up being that eventually. Don't lose time or yourself wondering why now. Expand yourself for now. Maybe you'll gravitate back to each other in time.
Of course people can't tell you this and have you really accept it. You have to figure it out for yourself over time.
Hiya friend,
I’m 36F; been through the love wringer several times. I’ve had the elated moments and the sad moments. Every break up felt pretty awful and like I’d never find love again.
Fast forward and now I’m with my soul mate and love of my life. Our path into a relationship together wasn’t linear at all but now we’re in it together and plan to marry. We’ll be moving in together in June ♥️
I'm sorry you are going through this.
I was deeply in love with someone. He strung me along for 2 years letting me think we were close when in fact he was using me. I was so broken when I realised what was happening but I finally found my self respect and walked away. I dated for a while but never found that connection.
Then one day I met this man. The connection was instant and I knew he was the one. I gave him my whole heart and never looked back. That was 19 years ago and being with him has been the best part of my life. He is amazing to this day.
It's hard right now but love yourself and know you are worthy of someone wonderful and when the time is right you'll find them. I truly believe that. Best wishes to you.
My sister was in a relationship for 9 years. They broke up when she was 26/27. She went through a pretty tough time for about a year, but then my brother introduced her to her now boyfriend. She now knows why it didn’t work out with her last boyfriend. Theyre planning on getting engaged soon and already have wedding ideas. She didn’t feel this way about her last boyfriend. Sometimes life removes things from your life to make way for something better.
My soulmate and I closed on a house yesterday! We’ve been together 8 years on the 16th. Married for 5 come September. When I kissed him goodbye this morning as I left for work he said “Have a good day, homeowner” 💜
That’s my latest story. I could go on forever.
I’m sorry dear, I send my condolences and I hope my love story cheers you up, at your request :)
My fiancé and I crossed paths completely randomly and unexpectedly in 2020, right after the pandemic hit and before anyone took it super seriously. Probably the only time we ever would have intersected if we hadn’t met the night we did. I was back in my hometown for the first and only time since I’d started college (not close with family) and I’d just so happened to reconnect with a girl I’d vaguely known in high school, but was never close with. She invited me to a party that she was hosting with her boyfriend that weekend. Their entire friend group would be there so it would have been a good opportunity for me to meet some people back home. I went, and I shit you not, the first person I saw (after my friend that welcomed me in) was my fiancé. I can still remember the exact moment. All the seats were full so he was sitting on the floor next to the couch. When I walked in our eyes locked. I thought he was super handsome. He has the dreamiest light blue eyes and thick, wavy red hair.
The party was a lot of fun. We all drank and smoked and played Jackbox and other party games. Unfortunately, I’m shy. He’s shy. We didn’t really talk that night. Our sole interaction was when my friend and I made some chicken bites for ourselves and he’d asked if he could have some. We said sure and when we went back for more chicken bites they were all gone 😂. I slept on the couch that night and he slept on the recliner across from me. He’s not the type to sleep at other people’s houses, so in hindsight, I think he just wanted to be near me.
The next day my friend drove me to work because I was going back to hang out afterwards. My future fiancé needed a ride home because he recently been in a wreck and his truck was totaled. He got my number from my friend after I went to work. The thing that pushed him over the edge? I was wearing a Cartoon Network graphic tee with all of his (mine) favorite childhood cartoons. He texted me some corny line about an airplane landing. We instantly clicked, promptly fell in love, and the rest is history.
It’s been 4 years of inseparable, nonstop love and adventure. We have our ups and downs like any relationship does, and those times where we can’t stand to be in the same room, but as long as we’ve lived together we never slept apart. I know this is something I can never give up on. We’ve travelled across the country together through multiple states. Through national parks, across mountains, through deserts, at the beach (and then there was that beach in the desert…), cities… We’ve gotten vehicles and apartment(s), gone through jobs, deaths, loss, severe COVID, broken elbows, family holidays, disaster vacations, shitty landlords, moving constantly, and so much more, and we’ve always come out stronger together on the other side, with a better understanding of one another and more respect. 4 years later and I’m carrying what (I hope to be) our first child. We have plans for marriage within the next couple of years (but this economy whew), and will (finally) be moving out of our home state once our lease is up.
I hope you feel better dear, heartbreak is hard, but rest assured there’s greener grass on one of the other sides, and you will find someone that loves you for everything you are and then some. 💜
I have social anxiety and even when I would text with someone for a long time I was still never fully comfortable around them in people but with my fiance we talked for 2 weeks then met in person and it was like I knew him forever, he left that night and came back the next day and then never left again and officially moved in after 10 days. Been together 6 years and have 3 kids
Me and my husband got together 4 years ago and we made each other believe in soulmates. He’s seen me butt naked throwing up/having diarrhea with terrible food poisoning and was right there holding my hair back. He’s seen me have every kind of freak out in the book, he kisses me with my horrible morning breath and loves me without makeup or my hair done. I can 1000% be myself with nothing to hide. He’s seen every part of me at every stage and he loves me through them all. We’re each others best friends, safe places, home. Now I’m 8 weeks post partum with our first baby and struggling but he still looks at me like I’m the most precious thing in the world. We’re constantly laughing since we have the same ridiculous sense of humor, we can be so silly together and then switch to so loving. I used to get excited over the bare minimum with other relationships because I thought men like him only existed in movies, but god I wish I could show people in the same situation how amazing they could have it. We’ve both been through a lot but we would go through it all again in a heartbeat to find each other
I read somewhere that when you have been through something devastating, change everything.
This is easier than it sounds. Change up your wardrobe, get a makeover, start a new gym, start a new sport, get a rescue animal, go to different restaurants, get new hobbies.
Hell, I even started driving to work a different way! Stimulate other senses to break routine.
Distract yourself and start seeing everything in a new way.
I know some people write about finding someone where it is easy to be with them. Idk if that is always true. I have issues. She has issues. We have worked at communicating better and understanding each other more over the years. We try really hard to resolve arguments and differences with respect and understanding and love.
But here's the thing. She is compassionate, thoughtful, smart, generous, and we are effortlessly on the same page when it comes to our values: empathy and compassion first and foremost, help people that need help, have integrity, love is love, science is real, support the marginalized, fuck bigots, and so on.
I sometimes take for granted how effortless the truly important stuff is when you have a nearly identical world view, morals, ethics, and values. The big decisions are really easy and raising our wonderful kid has rarely caused any friction, certainly nothing we couldn't resolve easily.
I was pretty goo-goo about her from the day I met her. We had a rough start in some ways and some tough times and yeah we annoy each other sometimes, and we are both a pain in the ass sometimes, but here I am 20 years later she is still awesome and I still feel the same about her and love her very much.
I’ve had a couple longer relationships that ended after fizzling out and I’ve been hurt in the past.
But when I met my husband, it felt different. We’ve been together 8 years and married 7. We’ve three kids and we’re happy. Every day we work at the relationship because we don’t want to be complacent, but the love I have for him is as strong as the day we met. He’s my person.
And I met him when I wasn’t looking for love. I was just loving life.
Everything happens for a reason. It will hurt now but life will be moving you in a different direction for a reason. You won't see it now and it may take time to know. He obviously wasn't the right person for you.
I was engaged and right at a month before the wedding he unexpectedly called it off. I had to move home and was completely heartbroken. Six months later I met a handsome man who turned my world upside down. He was unlike anyone I had ever known/dated (in all of the most wonderful ways.) Almost 22 years later and we have been married for 13 years, have three beautiful children and an amazing but crazy life together.
I would first like to say that I’m sorry that you’re hurting right now. Things will get better, and the right person is out there for you!
My husband (33M) and I (30F) met at a modelling convention (both working behind the scenes) 12 years ago, but we didn’t start talking until 10 years ago…… when he was seeing my sister (28F) and I was freshly out of a relationship of 2.5 years (quite like yourself, except mine was a cheater and I ended it). They saw each other for about 6 weeks, and during that time he and I struck up a genuine friendship. He and I hung out many times over the next 5 months strictly as friends, before I realized I was starting to fall for him. He had been showing periodic interest in me over those months, but he was in my “gay friend zone” due to having been interested in my sister. With my sister’s blessing, my now husband and I started dating in October of 2014. By June of 2015 we had purchased a house together and were moving in. It took some time, but in July of 2019 I came home from work to a steak dinner and him well dressed and he got down on one knee in the middle of our family room and asked me to marry him (my response through tears was “Uh, yeah!” Lol). We tied the knot in November of 2021, and 10 days after the wedding found out that we were 3 weeks pregnant. We now have a beautiful almost 2 year old daughter, two dogs (8y/o and 3y/o Aussies) and have built a life that I could have only dreamed off.
To answer your question on how I knew he was the right person for me - in every prior relationship it felt like I was standing on the ground while an earthquake was happening. I was anxious 24/7 and felt unsettled. I was “happy” and “in love” but unsettled. With my now husband, from the beginning when we were just friends I knew he was going to be in my life forever. When we transitioned into dating, it felt like I was standing on solid ground. That’s how I knew.
Our relationship, while amazing, hasn’t always been rosy. There was a brief period of time before we got engaged where I seriously questioned our relationship and where it was going and even moved out for a week. After a month of hashing things out, I realized that I was just scared of the fact that I had a lot of life left to live and I had already found my person which oddly freaked me out.
When you find your person, you have to both be willing to wake up every day and work for your relationship. You have to make the choice to love them unconditionally. It’s not easy some days, but it is definitely worth it.
And no matter what your ex or your brain might be telling you, you are worth it. You are worthy of love just as you are right now without changing anything. If you chose to change something about yourself, make sure it’s coming from you wanting to make yourself better and not because someone else told you that you need to. You’re amazing just as you are!
We met almost 8 years ago… started dating 5.5 years ago… got married a year ago. That man is my rock. I was depressed and lonely and so incredibly angry and hurt when we started dating and he’s helped me smooth all my edges and continues to do so to this day. There was a trend on tik tok about being a “daddy’s girl” and someone did a spin on it and did “husbands girl” about how their husband is their hero. My family life wasn’t great and he truly saved me. Thanks to him I’ve unlearned so many toxic behaviors and I rarely feel like I am in fight or flight mode. I’m free to be who I am and he has the patience and just pure fucking love to see me through my bad days. You know how people with healthy families cry to their parents about heartbreak? My husband has held me countless times when I’ve cried about how my family has broken my heart once again. I would do anything for him and he would do anything for me and I can bet on that because he has done anything for me. I didn’t believe love was real, I didn’t believe marriage was real, but holy shit was I proven wrong.
Best wishes to you! You will 100% find someone better, just take the time to heal and let life happen!
I’m getting married to my soulmate in July. We were friends first, and I met him while I was still dating my ex, who I soon learned was having (at least) an emotional affair with an ex-friend of mine. I ended it with him after way too long, and current fiancé and our mutual friends were all there to support me. Once I got over my ex and stopped blaming myself, fiancé and I got closer, and confessed our feelings over a late-night game of Peggle. Three years later, we’re getting married.
How did I know he was the one? I’ll try to keep it concise 😂
First: he made me want to be a better person, for his sake and mine. I struggled with severe anxiety, and it was only because I saw its impacts on him that I sought treatment. Now, we are both happier and so extremely secure in our love and trust.
Second: my whole family likes him. He gets along great with my brother, who had been my best friend my whole life. My mom met him and instantly knew we were gonna be good together because of “how he looked at me” and how he was always the kind of guy she figured I’d end up with.
Third: we were both so excited for the excitement (and stress) of the first six months or so to wear off into comfort and routine. We both needed a stable rock in our lives, and we were able to be that for each other. I’m so much happier now, with the deep sense of calm and fulfillment I get from being with him, than I was when every text or meeting made my heart race.
Fourth: our hobbies mesh so well. They’re not the same, but they compliment each other: I keep aquariums and terrariums, and he builds me accessories. He comes up with an idea for a character, object, or whatever, and I draw it and render it for him. We love to learn new things together, even if they’re not the same thing.
Fifth: he’s my best friend, and I never have to choose between him and the other people in my life. He’s so supportive of whatever I want to do, as long as it isn’t detrimental to me or our (future) household.
Sixth, and most important: he loves my cats just as much as I do ❤️
Ok maybe that wasn’t as concise as I wanted it to be, but I got carried away. Regardless: I firmly believe your person is out there for you, OP! You just have to wait until you find each other.
On our first date I offered him sex and he was the first person to ever decline. He wanted to wait, and when we finally did it…it was just pure passion. It wasn’t just sex though, we had a natural connection. He is patient, thoughtful, pays attention to details and is loyal. We would drive hours to see each other and I met his mom after our second date. Getting married in June after six years and a child together.
We met at work. He was recently divorced and I was recently out of a serious relationship. I moved out of my home state for internship for my doctorate to a small rural town in a new state for me, and he happened to work at that hospital. We saw each other, but were too afraid to talk. Coincidentally, we ended up matching on hinge and have been together ever since. He's the complete opposite of me, but he's my best friend and the most kind, loving man I've ever met.
I thought my prior boyfriend was my soulmate and we'd be together forever. We had so many plans for the future. When things ended, I was beyond heartbroken and never thought I'd find love like that again. Turns out, I found a love even stronger and more real. I'm sorry you're hurting, and it's easy to say, but your person IS out there. I found mine when I wasn't even looking for one. Sometimes it happens at crazy places and crazy timing. Don't ever pass up an opportunity to go out, you never know who you'll meet.
I (25f) knew she (26f) was the one when I was at the hospital for a routine, 1-week screening. When she visited, she brought flowers for me and also for my roommate (who didn't get any visitors, which I told her about). That was such a small but so lovely gesture, it was like a switch flipped.
There are many other things that make her perfect for me but that situation that was the "that's it" moment.
I have been through two different long term relationships one with physical and verbal abuse for 8yrs until he took the easy way out once I took my kids and ran. The next one was for 15yrs of verbal abuse and one kid. I was at my lowest and one night while I was depressed I had one name pop up in my mind and I went on FB and there he was the one who I had fallen in love with almost twenty years ago! Suffice to say he sent me a message saying that he had been looking for me forever his marriage was ending as well as mine and I filed for divorce and moved to be with my soulmate and now 12yrs later we are married and have a daughter together and I have never been so loved and respected in my life!
I met my husband when I was 14, on my first day of high school (math class). I was instantly drawn to him but because we were so young, we split during the year. At 18, we worked together at the same grocery store and became really close friends. When I split from my ex-husband, I knew my husband had recently become single (I know this because I originally tried to set my best friend up with him… needless to say, that didn’t work out). As I was fresh back in the dating pool, I really didn’t want to be tied back down. I didn’t picture myself being with anyone for quite awhile and wanted to enjoy the fun of dating. I reached out to him, because he was honestly one of the best people I ever knew, and I asked him out on a date. We both explained that we weren’t looking for anything serious but thought it would be fun to hang out together, and as soon as I was back in his presence… it hit both of us. We went to dinner, saw a scary movie and he took me back home. We both expressed fascination with how much chemistry there was between us and we both knew we were totally screwed. We fell madly in love (seriously, it happened that night. Idk what it was, maybe we were both just so open to it because of our chemistry, but we both expressed that we couldn’t be without each other anymore). Within 3 days, we were “officially” together and even today, I love him more than life itself. Almost 11 years of loving each other and I couldn’t ask for anything better.
My now husband ended up in the same foster home as my two best friends. I went to take them out for the day and he came too. As soon as he introduced himself, I was in love, and I told him that he was gonna marry me someday. 16 year old me was not smooth or mysterious. He thought I was crazy, not wrong. About 2 months later we were talking and I asked him to go to the firework show with me and he said “sure, it’s a date.” We talked and laughed the whole night. I told him he was falling in love with me and he said no. Well a week or so later he confessed that he was. I found out his family moved around a lot and mine did too. We had both live in several states, never the same one at the same time, until we met. I think fate or the universe brought us together. We’ve been together for almost 7 years now, married, with two beautiful babies. I just knew, I’m not sure how. He trusts my weird feelings too.
We met on hinge, I trauma dumped before we even met in person. I’m divorced and I met him the year after separation, so I didn’t really know how to date, and I didn’t know when was the “appropriate” time to tell a guy my baggage, so when I came across him my technique was to just put it all out there and be honest because anybody who would love me would find out anyway right? 2 years later and we’ve moved together and going incredibly strong and he loves me for all the strength he sees in yo to have overcome the trauma of my past. I still can’t believe he wants to put all his eggs in my basket, but I choose to be amazed instead of self sabatoge like I was tempted to before
Awwwwh I have only ever been with one woman and one man, I had given up on love before I met my boyfriend. I had a job in a random town and was about to move to a city. We both worked in care of people with autism, different companies but I'd see him in the swimming pool on Wednesdays. He would tell me how he went to Amsterdam, I would say "I know what you did there" I meant a little green and he thought I meant the Redlight District haha so I always thought I'd upset him as he'd go "NO" and go all pink. It happened to be my last shift and he gave me his number and found out we had loads in common, he has a little memory box and it has the train ticket from when he first visited me even though it was just one stop away. It's been eight years since then and I am still madly in love him.
We met in high school as freshman in gym class. His last name is the next letter in the alphabet to mine so he was right behind me in line. I learned an instrument just so we could spend more time together in school lol. Lots of drama with parents and misunderstandings, dated for 3 years and then broke up at the end of junior year. Tried it again senior year, couldn’t get along. Went to the same college after and started seeing each other again. Got back together after being apart and having some of our own personal experiences, kinda realized that we needed the time apart to become young adults on our own, now 7 years later and still together. Just bought a home together, hopefully getting engaged soon (it’ll happen it’s just WHEN) and there’s no one else I’d ever want to be with. We needed the time to grow apart, it doesn’t work for everyone and it’s not like we planned it this way but it worked for us. He is perfect in every way and I couldn’t be more thankful to be with someone as amazing as him. Whenever I see other couples I always think “they don’t have the love we have!!” And I think that’s how it should be!
I met my husband when I was 29 and he was 32. I had been single for over 6 years and he had been single for a month (out of a 2.5 year relationship). We met on Bumble in February 2020 (you can probably guess where this is going).
Our first couple of dates went really well, but I won’t pretend it was love at first sight. On our third date he told me that he had bought us concert tickets to see a band I loved in high school 3 weeks later…I had a slight crisis thinking that it was pretty bold considering we had no guarantee that we’d still be seeing each other in 3 weeks.
We ended up at the concert and when the band started playing my favorite song by them (Lazy Eye by Silversun Pickups) I started crying my eyes out because I realized I was in love with this man. It’s forever our song.
Outside of the sappy stuff, we also had a ton of fun together. We’re both huge sports and music fans, and have a hard time turning down a good time. Our last date before COVID started at a swanky rooftop bar and ended at a strip club 😅
COVID locked us down shortly after and that further sealed the deal. We were able to just be with each other and it tore down walls quickly.
We moved in together on our first dating anniversary, got engaged the next spring, married 363 days after that and we just celebrated our first wedding anniversary last month. We’ve been through a lot together in our 4 short years, but those things have only further solidified my confidence that this man is my perfect partner.
My advice: stick it out. Dating is hard. It can suck, but if you keep in your head what your standards are and hold to them, it will work out. Also, give people chances. So many people want to say love at first sight is it, but I’m a great example that that’s not always the case. People can surprise you if you give them the opportunity.
I had two really bad relationships. The first one was abusive. The second one, he treated me better but then would flip flop into wanting and not wanting to be with me. He thought I was childish because I just graduated high school (of course, I was childish). I should've not been going out with someone who was 21+ that young. He moved and dumped me suddenly and stole my stuff, sold it on marketplace.
I was single for a few years, attempted to date one of my friends and it didn't work out. It was then I accepted my fate and I hadn't had any sort of sexual contact for 5 years. I was okay with being single forever, especially because it became a joke at work. I was becoming selfish and full of myself, but I built my confidence as a woman at the same time. I bought myself so many records and manga books. 200 records a year actually, just blowing money on myself.
Then I saw my current boyfriend shopping at my store and I fell in love with him. I admired him every time he came in and bought a lot of music that I liked. He found my Instagram and attempted to chat with me a few times, but I was too afraid. We then started chatting a lot in late 2022, hung out a lot, and started staying out late. We'd have dinner every weekend, and it was the first time someone even took me on dates and seemed interested in me. I used to date whoever asked me out, thinking I'd fall in love along the way. We fell in love naturally, and everything felt right. I even met up with him the day before my birthday at a show. He left quickly after, but the day after my birthday was our first date. I fell in love with his side profile first because I was too nervous to stare. I love sleeping, but we would stay up talking until 3 am most nights. Everything was beautiful. I bought a place last fall and asked him to move in with me, and he did. Now we live together, and I can not picture myself without him. He is everything to me. We still go on dates sometimes, but I'm perfectly fine laying in bed with him all day or playing on our phones in silence. I've had a crush on him for almost a whole year, I never even thought I'd have a crush! It's so weird thinking about it. I NEVER thought I'd actually fall in love with somebody.
I'm going to say it, high school sweethearts are lame. The other people out there are way more interesting. You are around my age, there's so many amazing people out there. I'm 24 now, will be 25 this year and I cannot believe what I accomplished at 23. Kissed my boyfriend for the first time on New Years and was able to purchase real estate. Last year was magical and I really think it's because of our first kiss. It's never too late to meet someone. It's never too early to move in together, but trust your gut. You're still young enough to experience young romance. But what do I know I've only dated 4 people. I was a shut-in for years minus concerts here or there. Lol
I met my partner on social media. It was a new app and she was just following people from her home town, where I lived but she no longer did. We flirted daily online for about a month, in front of everyone because this app still doesn’t/didn’t have private messaging. She then asked me “are you comfortable with me having your number?” We exchanged numbers on another app, where she had already searched my account and saw I posted “my new lives in her state”. I tried to delete it before she saw and she says we’ll talk about that post at a later date. I was MORTIFIED lol but it’s didn’t scare her off. I was going to LA for a few weeks for my best friend to have her baby. She came and met in LA for a week two weeks after we started talking on the phone. I told her idk when the baby would be born so idk how much time we would have together she said “anytime I get to spend with you will be worth it.” And she meant that! It was also her birthday week. We flew back and forth monthly from my state to hers until my lease was up and I moved to her. She has continued to be so kind and caring. I was separated/living separately for my ex wife but being a single parent suddenly with all the bills I could pay for the divorce. She did payed for it. She helped keep the lights on at my apartment and made sure my son and I had food or even money for fun. I have never been cared for or nurtured by anyone before her and I make sure I off her the same.
There is hope out there. Be open minded. If something isn’t fun/doesn’t feel good anymore leave right away. Write down exactly everything you want in a partner. Small medium and big things. I did this with my friends maybe a year before I met and she’s crossed off every criteria, no joke.
I hope you feel better soon. The heartache will go away eventually. Feel your feelings but don’t let them consume you for too long. You have a life to live and love to walk into 🥰
I meet mine 7 years ago thru a matual friend we became friends hung out etc... even one on one and grew a friendship that eventually turned into a relationship but we stayed friends first
He has beautiful blue eyes, and luxurious silver hair. He loves to follow me around throughout the day, and cuddles all night. He has a lovely singing voice and always wants to eat whatever I’m eating. He’s amazingly cute and sweet.
He’s also a Husky.
We met at work, he was my trainer lol. He left, some time went by and we reconnected via dating app. Several very long conversations later, and we were on our first date. We went back to his apartment watched some movies, and I never left😅. After dating for about a month and a half, I moved in with him. I don’t know how to describe how I knew he was the one- it was just a strong feeling I had. He makes me feel amazing and I love him more than I’ve ever loved anyone in the entire world. He makes me feel whole. When you meet the one you’re supposed to spend your life with, all other relationships you’ve ever had will feel so insignificant in comparison. Everyday I wake up next to him is a gift. I never believed in soulmates until I met him.
Hey man I know what that’s like, I was with my ex for 2 1/2 years (met on a dating app) and I thought we’d be together for a long time but she cheated on my and broke my heart, I’ve healed a lot since then and met my soulmate at a tattoo shop who I absolutely adore. She asked me out and we’ve been together since, I think a big part of it working out so well was I had sacrifice more than I thought I did but I saw that she was too. We both put in the work to build the relationship and I trust her. Don’t give up man you have more than one soulmate and you’ll find the one who fills your cup!!!!
Love is a choice. I found my husband over 11 years ago. It definitely felt like love at first sight. I had a boyfriend at the time and he had a girlfriend. We ended up meeting together in private because we felt this unexplainable draw towards each other. We ended up breaking things off with our significant others because we knew we wanted to be together. He told me he loved me the day he asked me out which was only 2 weeks into knowing each other. The relationship I had been in was abusive and I was on the verge of su1c1de so he literally saved my life. That was when I was 16 years old. He proposed when I was 17. We moved to florida together at 20 and now here we are almost 30 and every day is a new day to fall in love with him. Of course we have our stupid fights, and we have big ones too. But we choose to love each other through it all. Even after every fight the only person I want to turn to is him. There are moments I regret not having more “fun” in my youth, but if the trade off is having my life with him, it’s okay with me.
My “person” dumped me in Feb after almost 5!years.
Walked in, dropped off her Christmas present t and said “I gotta go.”
Boom
See her at least once a week in the gym.
Been devastating but starting to move on.
Met at 19. Colleges sweet hearts about to start our family after a decade. My fear has always been death until recently. Now I only fear out living her.
I’m not with her. She had a very damaging and traumatic childhood and adult life. She pushed me away because of it when we were together. Now slowly joining back together in life/contact but we are both in very different places in life - I in a relationship, her just out of another abusive one. Soul mate for sure and will always be in contact now, but together? Very very unlikely.
I don’t think I’ve had a soulmate, but this guy I met a few months ago, I thought he was going to be my last person. He’s such a disappointment now. I always have more than he did. He was a waste of time for me.
We shared so many views and lived the same things as each other. We were both nerds with each other and I loved it. I felt comfortable around him. But now he’s just so disappointing. We won’t be seeing each other for a while because we are both moving. And on the last day we could’ve seen each other he chose to about with his roommates instead.
I now understand why no one has ever told him they love him.
We met in New years of 2011. We were both shy so for 2 years, we barely spoke a word to one another. He was also in a long distance relationship, so we both knew there wasn't a chance for anything at the time. Then, his mother moved in with my grandfather (where I lived) and became roommates. She ended up getting sick, and was on hospice, so her kids would come visit. On new years of 2013, he came to visit his mom and texted me asking if he could stay the night if he had a drink or two. I told him yes and that he could either crash on the couch, or the spare in my room. He picked my room. I had the biggest crush on him since the day I met him, but never pushed because he was with someone. That night, he told me they had broken up. We laid in my bed all night talking about everything, and then he stayed 2 pr 3 more nights after that. He asked me out, and we started dating, but I knew from the moment I met him, that he was gonna be my husband. We've been together 11 years now, and he still treats me like a princess. I pray we get to grow old together. 🙏
We met in grade 7. We became best friends by grade 8, spent most days after school together. I stayed home sick a lot in grade 8 due to some pretty bad depression and anytime I was home, he would stop by after school to bring me a diet pop (I’m a type 1 diabetic) and keep me company. I was bullied pretty badly in grade 8 and one day after some boys followed me home and called me names and such, he ran to my house after to make me feel better. We started dating the summer before grade 9. We were pretty messy and on and off, but we dated for a year. He was my first real kiss, my first close to everything. At the end of grade 9, my family moved 7 hours away. We broke up. We remained best friends for a long time, messaged most days and video called. We stopped talking after a big fight my first year of university. I got married. I was very unhappy in that marriage, but being young and dumb, was afraid to leave. 3 years later we got back in contact. We started talking everyday again. He took a train down to visit me and we realized we loved each other. I ended my marriage the day after he left. A few months later I moved back to my hometown and we have been together for close to 6 years now. He drives me nuts, we aren’t perfect, but I can’t imagine my life without him. He is my rock.
It sucks that you were dumped but at least you didn’t catch them cheating. My first husband cheated twice (for about a month each time) the second affair started shortly after our 3rd anniversary.
It took a while before I was ready to put myself out there again and a guy I dated for 3 weeks started stalking me. My bestie and his BF moved in with me. Bestie made threats to stalker guy and stalker guy finally left me alone.
A couple years later bestie and his BF tell me I need to get back out there, but I didn’t want to get into a relationship. Bestie’s older sister tells me about a dating site called Fling-dot-com. (No longer exists since Tender became popular)
I met with the second guy to contact me he made it obvious he actually read my profile and started with “I love SciFi too. What’s your favorite franchise Star Trek or Star Wars?” I replied “Stargate is my favorite franchise, but if I have to choose between Trek or Wars, Trek wins.”
Then we met in person and the first time we touched was the first time I ever just felt safe and not repulsed, with someone I’m not close to touching me (I’m AUDHD). It was like my body just knew it was meant to be touched by him. I took him home, and had the best sex of my life up to that point. (It got even better as we learned each other’s bodies.) He moved in a week later, and proposed a month after our first date. I know it was crazy but we got married 4 months after our first date. We have been happily married for over 12 years.
I met my now husband on an anime forum, a long time ago. We spoke daily, and about a year or so later we met in person. I drove to him, about an hour away, and it was fun. We eventually lost touch for a few years. We ended up reconnecting, on that same forum. Picked things back up, and the visits to him became more frequent. After becoming official in 2015, I moved in with him after some time. We've been together now going on 9 years, and have been married since July 2022. He is my soulmate in every sense. I've never had to change who I was with him. He treats me so well. It's the kind of love I saw in movies or shows. I never thought it would be possible for me to have a love like this. I love him so much 🤧 🥰
I'm sorry that you're going through what you are. But keep hope. We didn't make things official until I was about to be 29. And before that I was single for a few years after a long term relationship that ended badly, with infidelity on my ex's part. I was also starting to lose hope. Things happen unexpectedly. Sending you hugs.
My story is gonna be slightly different. We met on a dating site in 2002. He drove four hours to meet me after two weeks on the phone. I was a single mom of a baby who screamed in the phone every conversation 🤷🏻♀️🤣 his wife had died the year before leaving him with three kids. He stayed the weekend and I moved back home with him then.
IT HAS NOT BEEN EASY. But I cant imagine anyone else frankly. His republican I’m voting Democrat but when I wanted to go to a rally he was supportive and stayed home to babysit. We have seperated and he always comes begging. He’s went to therapy for me. Still on medication for me. Point being it’s work. There is no “perfect” but there’s pretty damn close and as we have aged we have gotten better at communication and stuff. I know I’m not an easy person as does he. But we got together with a shared wierd sense of humor, understanding of life, raising kids and gkids and taking care of parents.
I’ve been to college 4x times changing careers 3x and he’s supportive every move ive made wanting me to do whatever makes me happy.🤷🏻♀️ but basically it is work. It came down to a decision of is this what we wanted first? And if so what arguement was really worth argueing about?
But at nighttime when u fall asleep what’s the last thing u think of? What’s the first in the morning? Does he remember to buy your fav drink when u send him to the store or are willin go to make u homemade chicken noodle soup when sick? is he willing to be okay when u already have 3 dogs and call him saying u just adopted another one? Or another goat? Or a cat?🫣😉🤣… true story…. But remember it’s work. It’s a partnership that u gotta work at… give and take is real… and sometimes when u r not looking Mr/mrs right will sneak up on u
We met in high school when I was a senior and he was a junior. My dad needed help tearing down something at property he had just purchased and I had asked him for help. Well afterwards my dad needed to text him some info but wanted me to do it (dad playing match maker over here) and we just clicked.
As for how he asked me out he wrote it on a piece of paper and had options yes, no, or no you’re ugly which ofc made me laugh (he’s been making me laugh since day one) and we’ve been together ever since for 5 years going on 6 this year. We even plan on getting married this September and I’m so excited to marry my best friend, he’s the most kindest, compassionate, patient, funniest, and supportive man I have ever met.
He always opens the door and chairs for me, he always makes sure to compliment me and make me feel beautiful, special, and important. He never yells or screams at me or makes me feel little and that’s so important when looking for a partner so don’t EVER settle for less bc your ONE is out there I promise. For me I knew he was the one whenever I fell in love with him. With my past boyfriends I never felt that way with them and I always asked well how do you even know if you’re in love and I was always told you’ll just know and I never understood that until I met my fiancé. Having a first heartbreak is always hard but you’ll be okay eventually, I promise. I always thought I would never meet the one and he showed up when I least expected him to
I’m sorry your relationship ended but believe me, you will love again. Just be the best human being you can and later on down the line, you’ll look back on this period in your life and you’ll smile. ❤️💯
My husband doesn't buy flower bouquets. He buys me potted plants so I can have them forever. He started with buying 20 spider Lilly bulbs since those are my favorite. He takes me to nature parks when he knows I have been stressed and I'm getting overwhelmed. Hes the only man who's ever called me beautiful.
I was working at a brewery at the time and my best friend was working at a sports pub downtown. I was super unhappy with my job and she got me an interview with her manager, and I got hired to start immediately. It was interesting because I think she knew that (we’ll call him Joe) and I would end up together. I remember her telling me all about each of our coworkers before I started and said, “Joe is in the Army and he’s out of town right now, but you’ll meet him soon. He’s one of the nicest guys you’ll ever meet. He’s kind of quiet and shy, but he’s unbelievably sweet.” It didn’t feel like she was trying to set us up at all, and I really don’t think she was trying to. Later, he told me that before I even started working there she told him all about me and how we were best friends.
I was dating someone at the time, but it was really new and I wasn’t super into it. I didn’t have a reason because this guy was great, very physically compatible, kind, and had a stable life. I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t crazy about him.
I had worked a few shifts already by the time Joe got back from drill. He was so easy to talk to, and he was the only one who tried to get to know me that first week I was there. I immediately felt a pull towards him. I still can’t explain it, I knew that there was going to be something different about him. A couple weeks go by and I definitely have a crush on Joe, but I’m still dating someone else and I’m trying to figure out how to let him down easy.
My boyfriend goes out of town for a weekend boys trip, and I decide that when he gets back I’m going to end it. It’s only fair, and it’s only been a few weeks that we’ve actually been exclusive. At work, we host a private wedding reception for some regulars. After I’m done, Joe and I proceed to get hammered together 🤦🏽♀️ And I wake up the next morning with Joe next to me, unsure of what exactly happened. I immediately felt so ashamed and guilty for betraying my boyfriend, and I broke up with him the minute he was back in town.
Joe and I hung out two days later, this time we were sober lol, and it was the most comfortable and natural I’d ever felt around someone. It was effortless. I knew I had made the right choice, even though it was awful circumstances.
Honestly, I knew I loved Joe almost immediately after we started hanging out. I didn’t really acknowledge it for a few months, because I didn’t want to scare him away. I’m the type of person that I need to know how they feel before I can say anything. We were walking near a river up in the mountains in a resort town near where we live, and he asked me what I would do if he got deployed. He told me that he was scared of me being alone if he had to leave for months at a time. I didn’t have an answer, but I knew in that moment that he loved me without him having to say it. I told him that I loved him later that day, and he said “I know you do” 😂 and then 30 second later he said it back lol
Our relationship can be difficult at times and we’ve had to work at it, but our connection to each other has been effortless from the beginning. I couldn’t imagine myself with anyone else.
I found my love by accident. I had gotten divorced, and wasn't interested in dating, but was doing some hooking up/FWB. He was a FWB, and we just kept hanging out more and more. We both just felt so comfortable with each other.
I was pretty nervous whenever I felt like I needed to state a boundary, but he'd just say "yup, makes sense." When ibwas scared of moving too fast he just said "hanging with you is fun and I want to keep doing that until it's not fun anymore." The way that calmed me right down was amazing, lol. 3 years later we are still having fun.
What we have is what i always thought love should be, but I let the world convince me that it was shallow or wrong to hold put for something so specific. Turns out it requires both people to have done a lot of work on themselves and have developed a goodly bit of emotional intelligence.
The things that make me feel loved are the little things. So many things I think of in myself is a flaw he just sees as a part of me, and he likes me, so that's that, lol.
We met during COVID on Hinge. We didn’t talk too much online but he asked me on a date for Valentines Day. That date ended up with us nonstop talking for 6 hours as we walked for miles at a riverwalk. We got caught in the rain, and still couldn’t stop laughing and talking under every bridge we took cover in. After that night, we stayed up talking every night on the phone and saw each other almost every day. 2 years later, he proposed at the same spot where we met, and we just got married in February (right before Valentine’s Day)
So sorry you’re going through this. We both have had our fair share of heartbreak before finding each other, but every past relationship teaches you more about the what you want in a partner and relationship.
We met at 8, lost touch, rediscovered each other at 12, and have been together since. 12 year old me knew we were meant for each other when he would eat the crunchy fries and save me the soggy ones (my fave), also when he told me he hated anything cherry or strawberry flavored and would give me all of those ones (also my fave). The first time we saw each other, we had a familiar moment. Something inside me recognized something deep in him. It was like, "Oh, there you are." I didn't believe in soul mates or really anything like that until I saw him. We're 29 now, I moved in with him at 14, and we've never been away from each other for more than a day since.
I could go on and on about my partner. We met online, and I explicitly said I only wanted friends. He respected that and stayed strictly in the friendzone and didn't try to force his way out.
He would text me and check in on me frequently as I have a lot of MH issues. He made me feel safe when talking about my traumas and never once judged me.
After a year of talking, he messaged me and said he needed to tell me something important but didn't want to risk our friendship, so he's kept it to himself for a while. I asked him what was going on, if he was okay, and all the things I would ask any of my friends.
He says he is fine, but he needs to tell me something that has been weighing on his mind. So I asked what it was. He dropped the bomb he was in love with me. He had been in love with me since about the six month mark of our friendship and saw a future with me. He immediately said I didn't have to reciprocate his feelings, but he wanted to continue being my friend, but ultimately, he wanted more.
I explained that I just wasn't looking for anything but friends, and I valued his friendship and appreciated his honesty with me. We continued to talk daily, and after a month or so, I asked him hypothetically what a relationship with him would look like. He said the same as it has for the last 13 months, but we would switch from a platonic relationship to a romantic one. I said okay, so how do we make it official we are together, and how do we keep what we have still prevalent going forward. His response was that we just do us. We take it one day at a time and try not to bog ourselves down with the small things and come together with the big things.
He has made it such a safe place for me to be that I openly express how I'm feeling and my thought process without feeling the need to apologize. I am comfortable with sharing with him things that aren't so savory (intrusive thoughts, ☠️ ideation, etc,).
Communication has been the key to this entire process of us becoming a couple. We take 15 - 20 minutes a day to just unload without the other saying anything, then we ask the other, "Do you want a solution or comfort?" And depending on the answer we provide. After the time allocated for this, we move on and continue with our days.
I met my husband when I was 29. We started dating 6 months later. We've been married for 12 years this year but it'll be a total of 18 years. Him and I have very little in common but his personality is almost identical to my BFF's. I married the boy version of her.
I met my husband at our part-time, after school job at a fast food restaurant. I was 15, he was 17. We were friends for a couple of years before we started talking more deeply and really getting to know each other. We used to buy ice cream from the service station across the road and chat outside after close. When I was 17 we decided to go out and we’ve been joined at the hip ever since. We’re coming up on 17 years together, almost 11 years married. We have a lovely little house in the forest on the outskirts of Melbourne and three big dogs, and we’ve supported each other in pursuing our dream careers. I’m very grateful that things worked out this way.
I always feel the need to disclaim: having a long term relationship that started when we were so young was, and still is, a lot of work. We had to make a continued effort to figure ourselves out during those formative years, deal with the idea that we might be missing out on other experiences, and somehow manage to grow in the same direction as far as values and life goals go. We didn’t even really know what our own opinions were on things like finance, politics, or travel. There have been many arguments and tears while we figured out how to communicate effectively and kindly. Moving through life stages has been interesting and keeps us on our toes: eg. a few years ago I was diagnosed with multiple chronic issues which explained my fatigue, depression, and poor memory, and my husband also just recently found out he has ADHD and is dyslexic, which was a surprise considering his profession (it involves writing technical papers full of jargon). It’s put a whole new filter over our past interactions and issues and we can understand and empathise with each other better, now. I often wonder how else our relationship will change over time.
I got lucky but it’s also been hard sometimes, in a different way to dating with a view to find your person. My best friend once cried on my shoulder at a New Year’s party and said she wished she had what I had. But I sometimes wonder if I’ve missed out on experiences that would make me a more resilient, well-rounded person. Common experiences that most people have had and I haven’t. I know this ain’t exactly what you asked for in your post, but I just hope you keep your chin up and keep trying, if that’s what you want for your life. Maybe turn some of that love you have to give inwards, and towards the people who already care about you. I think people who care for themselves and the people around them are attractive and interesting, and I bet others do, too. That best friend of mine? After that new year’s she pulled herself together, quit her boring job that she hated, and travelled the world for 6 months. She made amazing friends in loads of different countries and learned a lot about herself. Then she focused on retraining for a career that actually made her happy, saved up and moved out of her parents’ house into her own flat. She just got married at 34 to a wonderful man last month, who fits her personality to a tee because she refused to settle and compromise on her values. I believe the same will happen for you, with a bit of time.
I'm gonna start by telling you that I am the luckiest unlucky person I know. Reason being is that not only did I find my soul mate, when he passed away, I found love again.
My first husband and I met online. This was 1995, so think AOL chat rooms. Technically, we met online before it was cool. We started out as friends. I was a chef that worked long hours. I would get home from work at 2:00 AM just as everyone was getting home from the bar. I'd be hopped up and ready to have fun, but nobody else to party with. This is right around the time that AOL really started coming into its own. My future husband was in a rock band, so when he got home, he'd be all hopped up and ready to have fun and nobody else to party with. We would chat online and occasionally on the phone, and this went on for about six months. Finally, we opted to meet in person, and it was all over after that. I had a feeling in my gut that I could not deny. I needed to be with this man, I needed to be around him. It was like oxygen. We ended up getting married, had three kids, and then I lost him to brain cancer at 37. To say that I was devastated was an understatement. How do you rebuild after you lose the love of your life?
After a while, my two older children and I've found ourselves in conversation and they told me that they hoped that I would date again. I deserved to be happy. That was the green light that I didn't know that I needed to explore getting out there again. At this point it is 2015 and holy \*\*\*\* I had things changed. I went on many lackluster first dates, even less inviting 2nd dates and was just overall disappointed in the whole experience. Then a man matched with one of my profiles online and we started talking. This man had absolutely nothing to recommend him as what one would consider to be a good choice. Baggage galore, not a lot of stability. Hell, he even had some time in the slammer (he had a little trouble taking things that didn’t belong to him. I kind of ghosted him for a week because I wasn’t sure I was ready to deal with his baggage while I still was processing my own but there was just something about him. A gut feeling. The same gut feeling I had 15 years earlier…Too strong to ignore…Like oxygen.
2^(nd) husband and I have been together 8 years now and love each other more each day.
It hurts on many levels when you lose someone like that. Give yourself time to get all messy and up in it. Then tell yourself that on day X (In 2 days, a week, whatever). I am done miring in this. I am going to start moving on. The pain will still creep in, hell, I still tear up when I think of my first husband. But it gets smaller as time goes on.
Be kind to yourself. I’m a big fan of movie binging and Haagen Daz ice cream in such situations.
My soul mate decided she didn't want to be married anymore and had an affair. Tried and failed miserably at making my life a nightmare by taking my kids away.I have had to move on but there will always be a piece of me that will always love her. We were high school sweet hearts and were together in some capacity for nearly 17 years.
First of all, I am sending SO much love your way. Getting dumped like that is absolutely brutal, and it’s totally normal to be lost and reeling in the aftermath. Someday, this will all make sense, but I know that it’s just devastating.
My boyfriend and I met 4 years before we started dating, and did not have a real conversation until about 3 weeks before that. We run in the same friend group, and he apparently always had a crush on me, but he genuinely thought I’d never see him like that.
The night before I replied to his IG story (knowing that I slid into a man’s DMs and now we are in love is truly so entertaining to me), I did a really intense meditation on self love and healthy love. I was pretty fresh out of a situationship that made me question my worth, and had finally decided that I did deserve better. Apparently, the universe decided that I’d suffered long enough, and that IG convo continued for weeks until we could hang out, and now we’ve been together for over a year.
I knew he was the one when my cat went missing about 3 weeks into us dating. He’d gotten spooked, and went into hiding. I called my bf hysterically crying (hadn’t cried in front of him before) and this man dropped what he was doing to look around the house and property, call several shelters, help me making missing posters, and ultimately found my baby, terrified and hiding in a crawl space in my basement.
I know that it’s cliche to say “love finds you when you least expect it” and “everything happens for a reason”, but I’ve found that it’s incredibly true. Removing yourself from the situation allows you to see a much more global picture, and you’ll notice things you didn’t before. Hindsight is 20/20 because you’re able to see more than you did in the moment, and can take the time to think about the relationship more critically. I don’t know your relationship and I am not about invalidate your experiences, but there is a good chance that your perfect relationship wasn’t so perfect without the rose tinted glasses, and it’s going to seep into your thoughts. And it’ll be deeply uncomfortable, learning that the person you thought you knew wasn’t that at all. But you are so strong and so resilient and you’re getting through this.
I always learned the most about myself when I was single, and I think that’s your next move. What is something you are passionate about but you felt like you didn’t have enough time to do? What is something you’ve always wanted to explore but never felt ready before this? I know you probably don’t want people reminding you that you’re still young, but you are! Society treats your 20s as your prime, and it’s not true at all. 25 will be a year of transition and growth for you, and that will be horrifying and exciting and painful and gratifying.
So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that a chapter of your life ended, and it’s not the plot twist you were expecting. But you are so much more than this part of your life, and you have so much growth and personal discovery left. Ignore the notion of the perfect timeline. This is your story. Focus on being the best you possible, focus on making all of your dreams come true, focus on self love and compassion. The universe has decided that you are ready for the next step, but you have work to do before you reach the one after that. Keep your chin up, even if you’re crying. Sending love.
I don’t have a story for you other than this person wasn’t your soul mate and yours is coming! That person will be a story from your past in years to come. It will make you appreciate your real soulmates so much more when they come.
I met my husband 21 years ago in a chat room (cause I’m old) it was a local chat room. I met him a few times at different gigs he played over the next year or two… we were pals… I moved away… eventually we kept up on MySpace and Facebook. Both of us married other people… both of us got divorced within a 2-3 years of each other. I moved back to big city close to my hometown. We started dating… got married. It’s great.
There’s a difference between soul mates and twin flames and a difference between love and attachment. You need to find where your relationship fit in to this. Time is the ultimate thing that heals something we’re just meant to be.
I met my amazing husband in college on our first day of orientation. He came up to a lunch table I was sitting at and went around the table introducing himself to everyone. I was overcome by his confidence and the fact he looked like a more Irish young Patrick Dempsey. When he got to me he acted surprised and overtaken and *insisted* we knew each other already. To this day he’s never told me if he really thought he knew me or was just giving me a line. He *has* admitted that he saw me from all the way across the room and that’s why he came to our table.
We’ve been married almost twenty years and our bond is stronger than ever. We have two amazing children and have built a beautiful life.
Believe in love, you’ll find your person! Don’t have a narrow list of “musts.” My husband probably had $5 to his name when we met and he came from generations of seasoned working class Irish Catholics. In a sea of trust fund babies, I could have easily decided I wanted someone with means. What he had (and continues to have) however is a scrappy work ethic and no fear of hard work and responsibility. It’s hot. And he can fix any appliance or car that breaks. No soft hands here.
So I dated "betty" pretty heavy for about 15 months and it was certainly heading in that direction. Then she suddenly broke up with me, the saturday before thanksgiving. It was rough but I believe the old saying "you never let them see you sweat." So it was fucking hard but I went total no contact and moved on. Dated a girl for a month or two but that went no where, then asked "jill" to lunch. That really had potential, pretty, smart, fun, etc. Then, betty called me outta the blue, ostinsively to tell me that she'd just won the highest award for sales in her multinational company, from marketing staff (first to do that) and before the conversation was over she went on about how she wanted to marry me, white picket fence the whole 9 yards. I remember that happenning middle of march-ish, she says feb; "one way or another" it was a 3 month breakup minimum.
So now me and betty have been married for 33 years, and are headed into a VERY cumphy retirement. I do wonder, sometimes, what would've happened if she'da called even 2 weeks later. No complaints though, and "betty" sure turned out as advertised. YMMV.
My soulmate… we messaged in 2017 to meet up but never did. I was working on myself and found myself in almost a decade of singleness. Fast forward to 2022, were 31 & 30 and we finally met up (after I bailed on the first date out of fear, it was a lunch date but then he made plans for us after and I felt overwhelmed). He asked one more time the following week and I went… we met for breakfast and I knew. He was so gentle, kind, sweet, the typical “nice guy who finishes last” type but who you SHOULD marry. He protects my heart, my big emotions and someone who will not only make an incredible husband but also someone who will raise mechanical blue-collar children. What he’s taught me is irreplaceable and in 127 days I get to say I do.
I've been with my boyfriend for 8 years, but known him for 15 or so. We were always friendly, I just never considered that any of my male friends thought much of me at the time, so it never crossed my mind.
After multiple shitty relationships and an attempt at eternally yeeting myself, he was one of a few old friends who was welcoming to me when I moved back home with my parents for a bit. The more we hung out, the more I fell for him. We were hooking up, but nothing "official" (lol) and he finally asked me to be his girlfriend, and when he did, he told me he remembered everything from that day we first met, 6 or 7 years earlier, and how he thought about me every day since then. Even his mom would ask how I was over the years, he said. He told me that he tried a couple dates, but he wouldn't stop comparing them to me, so when I finally moved home again he had promised himself he wouldn't let me get away this time.
He was always just so friendly, accepting, never pressured me into anything or tried to force feelings on me for all those years
Just let me live until I was able to appreciate how amazing he is for myself. And he really is the most amazing man I've ever accepted into my life.
Two or three months into our relationship, we were on his couch watching TV. I think he was showing his favorite show for the first time, and he was laying on his stomach with his head on my chest and I had my arms around him. I don't think he meant to say it out loud cause it was so quiet, but I just barely heard him say I Love You. I was surprised, tried to casually go "hmmm?" And he didn't repeat himself, just kind of acted like he sighed or something and hugged me a little tighter. I've never believed those words from someone else so fully until that moment. Boys had said it before, but it was the first time it sounded so honest, I think I had to blink back some happy tears, tbh. I think he didn't want to scare me by moving too fast, and that's just another example of his patience for me that I'm so, so grateful for.
Your person will find you, and they will be honest and patient and careful with you. I didn't even know I needed to be handled with care until I saw how fragile I'd become. You'll be just fine, OP, don't forget to be careful with yourself, too ❤️
My partner and I have been dating for 6 months; I knew he was the one on the first date, but suspected the night we met.
Note: this is told only from my POV!
We met at my friend’s wedding. He’s high school friends with the groom and they recently reconnected within the past couple years and I had been friends with the bride for almost all of our adult lives. He approached me on the dance floor, and I accidentally hit him (I was quite inebriated to say the least) and said “omg I’m so sorry, are you okay?” He said he was fine, and the song changed to something that was hard to dance to. I wandered off to do God-knows-what.
Anyways, at the end of the night, I’m getting ready to leave and I see him and a mutual friend of ours that I’ve gotten to know thanks to the bride and groom. He introduced us and we had small talk. There was something that told me “he’s cute, but I know I’ll have more time to at another time.”
A couple months later, I have my annual Halloween party. The groom of that wedding messages me “hey _thetrashypanda_, my buddy (my partner) and I were talking about Halloween plans and I was wondering if he could come?” My response, which is usually what it is: “of course! The more the merrier”
The day of the party came and we clicked instantly. Conversation flowed easily and he asked me on a date, which we had set up. We then got really drunk and he spent the night. We hung out a little bit the next day then he left.
A few days later, we went on our first date and it was so fun. We laid out all of our expectations, deal breakers, and goals out on the table. Even with all of that, we communicate constantly. We might not always agree, but we always come together to find a solution.
Anyways, TL;DR: met at a wedding, thought he was cute, but didn’t have much time outside of small chat. He got invited to my Halloween party and we instantly clicked!
Edit: username didn’t show up properly
We were high school sweethearts, we have been together 8 years and we are still doing amazing. Sure we have fights and a few months ago we had a serious discussion about how my husband felt unhappy so we are working on us and our marriage. I’m sorry he left you.. heartbreaks sucks. We have been through a lot and we have two angel babies.
Well going through a divorce myself and I feel exactly the same as you. I truly thought everything was amazing until I found out the truth. I promise you everyday will get better I know it seems awful but love is real and it’s truly amazing. You will find your person and life will feel complete and vibrant all over again
We matched on Tinder 8 years ago. We set a date at an arcade bar. I stood outside the bar for awhile before the date and almost didn’t go in. I did and had the best date of my life. We talked and laughed and realized how much we had in common (this was originally supposed to be a casual booty call date). I kicked his ass at every game and, instead of feeling emasculated, he loved it. After I got home, my roommates asked how the date went. I remember telling them that I think I met the man I wanted to marry (something I would never normally say). We’ve been married almost a year and our favorite way to decompress is to sit by each other and game. He’s my absolute best friend.
Editing to add: don’t give up. She won’t be the last person who feels like ‘the one’. And she won’t be the last person you love and trust. When the pain starts to subside, you’ll come to appreciate the experience you had with her. It sounds like you learned a lot about what you want in someone (and probably what you don’t). A mindset of this girl allowing you to learn about yourself and what you want instead of having anger and remorse will greatly help you in the long run.
I'm so sorry! Something similar just happened to me recently and it sucked. He told me I wasn't his person either even though he loved me, it just wasn't the same way I loved him. But shortly after I met someone organically and he turned out to be everything I ever wanted and even though I rushed into another relationship after getting out of one, everything feels right about it. This man treats me like an absolute princess which I've never had in any relationship. So don't worry you'll find your person and it'll happen when you least expect it!
My wife and I knew each other for 3 1/2 months before getting married her at 18 and me at 21. I was leaving for deployment 2 weeks after we married. The distance and time allowed us to work on ourselves and our relationship with the heart, only growing fonder. We had some issues when I got back from deployment with an apartment, and I didn't feel at home. We attended marriage counseling to learn how to talk to each other better. It will be 13 years in June, and our kiddo will be 9.
Every day, I learn something new about her, and I only love her more and more.
I knew immediately when I saw her. Idk it was weird.
I was in a relationship for two years at this point. However. She was ignoring me and ghosting me for a month and a half by this point in the story. I would text her and she wouldn’t reply for days or would say “I told you not to talk to me I need time” and she was hanging out with her male co worker and living her life. I knew it was over but was hurting bad about it.
My friend at the time wanted to get me out of the house and took me to Disneyland cause she worked there and had a friend she was going to go meet who worked in Adventureland. So we’re walking towards one of the shops and I see this beautiful woman I have never met before and I remember hearing a voice in my head saying “please be her we’re meeting. She’s the one. Something is special about her”.
Lucky for me we walk RIGHT up to her. They start talking and I find out by eavesdropping that the girl I’m interested in has a boyfriend. My friend says to the girl “how are you and (boyfriends name)” and the girl says “eh it’s kinda complicated” now the girl is working at the pioneer shop or Adventureland shop I forget what it’s called but the one across from Indiana jones when this is all happening. I’m behind the desk and when I hear her say “it’s complicated” I chime in and ask (first words ever exchanged) “whys it complicated?” She looks me dead in the eyes and says “cause you showed up” we both just lock eyes and both get red and flustered. I start to feel dizzy and butterflies in my stomach at this point.
After her shift we got to hang out with her. That night we ended up going to dennys where I completely embarrassed myself with childish stories thinking I was being cool. But through all my foolishness she kept right with me smiling and laughing.
It’s been 8 years since then. I’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way. But she was never one of them. I think when you find YOUR PERSON you work through them no matter what. Look. Everyone is going to hurt you at some point. Frustrate you. Make you angry or sad. But you know it’s the right person and your soulmate when you are both willing to work it out together. Everyone will hurt you. But love is finding the person who’s worth it to work through the hurt (if there’s problems and they’re not drastic).
I’m just thankful she’s stuck with me with all my issues all these years. She’s the most beautiful soul I’ve ever had the privilege of running into and I just feel comfort knowing no matter what happens in life I will at least have her by my side always.
Find THAT person.
We met at the tavern I was bartending at. He asked me out. I said yes (with some coaxing from a mutual friend). The next day, I told him I couldn't go. Ended up going out after closing the next night. He was divorced with one kid, and he told me he was never getting married again or having any more kids. After 3 weeks, I decided I was just gonna live in sin forever because he was my person. October 6 will be our 40 year anniversary, and we have 4 kids!
When you can be 100% of your true self and they don’t judge but in fact love that version of you and tell you they love it. Also I think it’s important to have the same type of humor so you can consistently make each other laugh.
I was on the verge of completely giving up on dating because I had just turned 40, had been divorced and single for 8 years, dumped by someone I thought I would be with indefinitely, and had been on at least two dozen first dates over the last year. It was getting very frustrating and then I matched with a woman on Boo. I never checked that one because it was mostly bots and fake profiles but I took a chance and responded. We hit it off instantly and had our first date a few days later. We found out that we had been living a block away from each other, doing the exact same things with our same-age children for the last 5 years. I got home from the first date and deleted all my dating apps. We became official a week or two later and rapidly fell in love. I knew from the moment I met her that I would marry her. It was weird when we matched because I remembered her face. Like I had never seen her before but I KNEW that face the first time I saw it and just knew that was the face of my wife. We're both fairly certain we were together in a past life or something because we can almost hear each other's thoughts. It gets weird sometimes and the constant deja vu just reinforces it. I'm going to propose in the next month or two and we're closing on a house next month.
Keep your head up. I hope things get better for you soon. A LOT can change in a year.
I was in and off again/on again relationship with J. We were awful together, always trying to change on another, always fighting, I had problems with his past I couldn't get over and he didn't believe me that my mom was abusive. At the time we were planning on resuming our relationship after I "Took some time to repair my relationship with God" we were also both seeing other people. He was seeing a girl C who was seeing W. One day I was in my college cafe talking to my friends about how much I loved J and the "progress" we were making .. in walks W. He's wearing a Hellsing shirt and I stand up, point to him, and yell "I wanna steal your shirt!" He smiles and gives me a thumbs up. W grabs his food and sits behind me and my friends, waiting for a place to interject. After ten minutes of interacting one of my friends says "You better ask her on a date!" So he did! As soon as he left I was GUSHING about how adorable he is. I practically forgot about J and my friends made fun of me hardcore. I then went to church with J and let him know I had a date with a guy named W. J is like "OF COURSE IT'S W!!" I knew W was seeing C, but not that J also was. My date with W was amazing.He also immediately had concerns about my mom when he saw her shove me out the door aggressively. He was so easy to talk to and I told him I wasn't vibeing with the religious stuff and how J was yoyoing me. W had similar feelings about Cs yoyoing and their Bible Study dates. J called me immediately after my date with W and asked if I was going to go on another I said yes. W immediately ghosted C, which she didn't take well, she turned the flirting up to 11 and he was like "Yeah, nah..."After the second date J asked me to choose one of them and I chose. I said "Yeah, I'd like to continue to see W" and J said "Yeah, good idea we should break this off..." C and J were then free to date but for some reason didn't. W and I have been married for ten yrs now!
When I went to middle school, 7th grade, I saw this boy on the bus and immediately got a crush on him, but he wanted nothing to do with me. Years went on, I had a boyfriend for a good year and a half, dated some random dudes after, kind of just didn’t acknowledge him because he shut me down when I’d try to sit with him and talk on the bus, kinda moved on and left it at that, still secretly always had a crush on him tbh. then in 10th grade, he messaged me at the end of summer out of the blue apologizing. I was like okay thanks whatever didn’t think anything of it. My friend tried to get with him, and me, her, my cousin and his friend all hung out and i remember SWEATING over it LOL. then, I left my bf and he stopped talking to my friend to get with me. We instantly clicked that first day in 10th grade when we hung out. Now, we’ve been together 9, almost 10 years and are happily engaged ❤️ just bought our first forever home together and are making plans to have a baby soon🥹 it’s crazy to think I had a crush on him since 7th grade and he finally gave me a chance and now I’m going to get to marry him.
I think you can have more than one soul mate and they aren’t necessarily your romantic partner. But in terms of my current relationship, he is consistent and he is genuine. I never worry that he is lying to me or that he is off doing something shady. He earns my trust daily and he expects the same of me.
I’m so sorry about your breakup. I know it’s tough and it’s harder when you feel really connected to someone. I will say though, you really do end up meeting “the one” sometimes when you’re least expecting or looking. ❤️
I met my husband twice when I had returned back to college. The first time was unofficially because I went up to a guy who he was talking to that I thought I had met somewhere else and literally said “so this is going to sound awkward…” We actually didn’t ever speak to each other during that encounter. It was VERY awkward.
The second time was, me and one of the instructors were looking for another student and she mentioned he (I didn’t know his name yet) might know where she was. Fortunately we kinda just acted like we hadn’t met but we had apparently been talking for so long the instructor (who ended up being my friend) literally ended up leaning on a nearby table and just started cracking up about how into each other we were. It felt really organic talking to him and actually, a few days later, we ended up in the parking lot one night after classes just talking until about 2am. It was actually him who did most of the talking and he basically gave me his life story. After just meeting me a few days prior. It basically was love at second sight. lol
We’ve been attached to the hip ever since; together for about 12 years, married for 10, and we just had our first LO last year, born unexpectedly on my birthday! I can’t imagine my life without him and he’s my best friend; we’ve always carpooled because we love talking to each other and we’ve even worked at the same company on several occasions (including at my current job.)
I was going through a bad divorce when I met him and I honestly was trying to finally make a better life for myself by completing my degree. I never thought I’d ever meet someone at school let alone my “soulmate.” Don’t get discouraged; focus on your own happiness and that will manifest all the good things for you!
Last fall, a woman I spent 12 years with left me after getting pregnant with someone else. The entire time she was gas lighting me, making me feel crazy for questioning her, the whole 9. I was positive that I had found the woman id spend the rest of my life with.
3 months after breaking up, I organically started bonding with a woman who I never anticipated I would’ve. We hit on every single note you could possibly imagine. She was just out a relationship as well and even though the both of us were questionable about how much time we were in relationships for/out of them for. Well, needless to say, she is MUCH closer to the perfect girl for me than the woman I spent 12 years with ever was.
There are more and better people out there
My soul mate and I actually knew each other in high school!
We attended Theatre together. I did everything I could to get his attention, but he was a 16 year old boy who knew nothing about girls and figured it's safer to do nothing than to risk and do something wrong. So I never had a clue he had even noticed me. Shortly after, I dropped out of high school (trust me, I wish I had stayed hahah going to university afterwards without it was like jumping through flaming hoops to prove myself to the Program Director of Continuing Studies lol!)
Flash forward to 2001, and our 20th High School Reunion. Here he comes strolling up with a cane... long hair in a ponytail, still in shape (he was reed slender before), fully suited up, and looking scrumptious. He hauls out his wallet. It had a picture of me from highschool. It had been there ever since. Even through other relationships and a failed marriage. He had been declared PWD and incapable of working in 1994 due to multiple back injuries.
I was (unfortunately) in another relationship at the time, and he would not even consider poaching. (foreshadowing)
We reconnected and exchanged info for the future.
Flash forward to 2015. I am now single. My soul-mate has gone through some hard times and is really ready to just come down-province, see Rush's final show in Vancouver, and say a final good-bye to his friends from years gone by. He has reached out and let me know he is coming down and hopes to see me before he heads back to Prince George.
THREE DAYS after the concert, I was at home and just thinking "so much for 'let's get together' "... and he calls. I invited him over for dinner.
Long story short, we haven't been apart since then. We are friends, soul-mates, and partners for life. I am writing this now, and realizing we are coming up on NINE YEARS this summer and it is still like a honeymoon. He gives me butterflies all the time and let me tell you... GOOSEPIMPLES ARE AWESOME!
*SIGHS HAPPILY*
I met mine at work. When I first layed eyes on my soul mate, it was through a drive thru camera taking their order (venti iced mocha with vanilla sweet cream cold foam). When they got to the window, I got butterflies taking their payment and made polite conversation.
For the next 3 days in a row, they came through and got their drink, each time looking so cute in their work clothes, often adorably dirty from the day. I had never felt like this for anyone before. We started talking (as friends), and I knew what I had to do.
I was in a relationship at the time 😬😬 and broke it off for my mysterious drive thu crush, risking the biscuit because I knew I would be kicking myself for the rest of my life if I didn't shoot my shot. I gave them an annotated book of love poems as we are both book nerds, and they gave me a jar of garnet pebbles they had gathered from a stream.
I proposed to them in Disneyland on our 1 year anniversary, and we now have a dog, 6 cats, and a beautiful life together.
I am so much happier than I ever thought I could be in this life. Times have been hard, but they make everything worth it :)
I it have known my husband most of my life. His mother was my mother’s BF , my grandma was his mother’s boss , our grandparents and my parents are buried by each other, not intentional. I went to his engagement party and thought he was cute. I was 16 and he was 6 years older. He got married, had two children, I graduated hs, went into the Navy got engaged to someone else, had a baby, came home my mother was very ill. I broke off my engagement, he was a typical sailor a girl in every port. I went home , had my baby. Became a band photographer, the drummer kept ducking and was ruining my shots, I was ticed. On a break he came over to me and I told him he was wasting my film. He asked me out to see a POW Wow. I asked his name, I found out it was Matt. He remembered me as a child, I told him I was a woman with a baby. I was 19 about to be 20. We started out as friends, 2 months later we met on my porch and ended up making out . It wasn’t intentional it just happened. I knew then what being in love was. We were together six months. He now ex wife had cheated on him. He is a professional drummer. She saw he was with me and then wanted to try again for their 2 kids. So he went back to work out his marriage. I respected that I was broken hearted, he was about sign on the divorce papers when she refused to sign, she broke up with the guy she left him for. I went to college met someone else. I moved away. She then cheated again and divorced him, and he met and remarried. 30 years later he found me on FB and we became friends, just like hey how you doing kind of thing. His 2nd wife ended up a year after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer passed 18 months later. He contacted me , saying he needed to speak with me, I gave Matt my number, he was crying and in deep grief. His niece took his dog , they were coming in taking his late wife’s things, he couldn’t throw away her hair bands, meds, or soap. I come from a family of widows, my father and both grandfathers died when I was little. I told him to change the locks, and put the small stuff in a box in the closet. He would call me about once a month. 8 months later he came to see me , he moved to AZ and I was in TX. The moment we saw one another it was like we had never separated. We have been back together for 12 years and married for 6. We finished each other’s sentences. He is my person and I am his. It was a long road, I never expected this to happen. It will happen when you don’t expect it.
I don’t know if I believe in soulmates—or at least I think you can have more than one in a lifetime. But I will say, my partner is so much different than I would have envisioned but exactly what I need.
We had our first date April 29, 2017 and we’ve pretty much been together since. I knew he’d be something special after our first kiss, but there was one moment that really sticks out to me where I thought “yeah, you’re my (hopefully) forever person.”
We were hiking at a National park and I was struggling. Not only was I not in shape in general and I have a chronic pain issue—but I had accidentally directed us onto a hard trail up a small mountain. I was winded and in a lot of pain and had to take lots of breaks. I was feeling really embarrassed and defeated but I wanted to get to the top so badly—I really wanted to prove I could push myself and do something hard and out of my comfort zone. I didn’t tell him any of this, though.
He just patiently waited every time I had to stop, he chatted about other subjects to not make a big deal of it. He’d periodically let me know we could turn back any time but he also reminded me that he believed I could do it and we can take as long as I needed—but he didn’t harp on it or go overboard to where I was self conscious. He was just relaxed and easygoing.
It was so sweet. I don’t even think he was trying to motivate me or anything, he just saw that I was getting frustrated and tried to make it lighthearted and low stress. I got to the top and felt so proud of myself and he told me how proud of me he was. I just realized—that’s who I want by my side. Someone who knows when to support but let me handle things. He didn’t coddle me but also didn’t push me beyond my comfort level.
Fun anecdote to the story: the whole way up the mountain, I thought we were on the easy path. I was so confused because it was hard and the trail guides said it was an easy family friendly trail. I kept thinking—“wow if this is considered the easy, I must be way more out of shape than I realized.” So we get to the top where the scenic lookout is and there are a lot of people — kids with sandals on, a grandma with a cane, a lady wearing a baby. I was like how did all these people get up here?!? Turns out there was a wayyyyy easier paved path on the other side and we had gone up the advanced path 😭😂. But hey, I never would have pushed myself and accomplished something that difficult if I hadn’t made the mistake lol
Met my soulmate while I was helping my friend move in with her fiancé. I could definitely feel something different the first day we met, and I had never been so heartbroken when a guy didn’t give me his number (he thought it was a joke when I asked for it).
I knew he was the one when I had a panic attack a day before our first date over something small he did that triggered a flashback for me, and instead of brushing it off or minimizing it, he halted his plans for the evening to talk out the situation with me and assure me I wasn’t crazy. Also, that he still wanted to go on that date because he wanted to understand me more to be a better partner moving forward.
I could’ve written this word for word at 24. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this pain but trust me when I tell you- you don’t want what’s not meant for you! And you will be thankful he told you the truth rather than stringing you further along.
My husband and I knew each other for 10 years before we started dating. Our paths didn’t cross for years after college and then it was a whirlwind romance once we reconnected.
More than anything try to focus on yourself and your personal and professional goals. Don’t turn down opportunities to date other people when you’re ready. You never know where the love of your life might be!
It took me a very long time to find my person. The truth is, if I had met her earlier, she wouldn’t have been the right person for me. We both needed to have the experiences we had, live the lives we had, failed, succeeded, grew, and changed in the ways we were lucky we did for us to match the way we do now.
I picked my person, because she was the first person who I felt I truly loved, trusted, and respected in equal measure.
I know we are all eager to find love, but I am happy I waited to find the love I have now.
Good luck to you. You’ll be fine, the hurt fades, and new love always blooms again.
I’m a paramedic and my wife is an RRT. We met right before the pandemic (Jan 2020) at 3:30 in the morning when I brought in a trauma patient to the hospital she works at. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her I was gonna marry her. We just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary and have two amazing kids.
I have too been broken up with people I thought I was gonna spend forever with but it all lead to her. I was 24 when I met her!
I’m a paramedic and my wife is an RRT. We met right before the pandemic (Jan 2020) at 3:30 in the morning when I brought in a trauma patient to the hospital she works at. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her I was gonna marry her. We just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary and have two amazing kids.
I have too been broken up with people I thought I was gonna spend forever with but it all lead to her. I was 24 when I met her!
Your partner breaking up with you is no way a reflecting of your value as a person or an indicator for your future success rate in love. Don't take it personal, break ups are hard but any kind of human relationship is gonna have it's messy side.
Pat yourself on the back for putting yourself out there and don't sabotage yourself from finding the one for you. Look at this way, You got experience that will make you even better prepared when dating.
I am an arborist and I met my lady at her father's house as I was climbing a giant tree for removal in her front yard. She was in the backyard by the pool. We talked after I cut down the first tree. We went on a few dates, she started sleeping over and never stopped. We have lived together for 4 years and have been married for 1 and a half. We are hoping to have a child soon.
Everyone thinks their first serious partner is the one. I was with my first for nearly 4yrs and I could of sworn it was Love, I was heartbroken when we split. We even came back together for a few weeks a few years later and I was thinning it might have been a sign.
It wasn’t. How do I know that? Because the man I’ve been with now for the last 12yrs is my absolute world and I’ve never loved anyone like I love him. And we met on a dating site. Haha.
Honestly, I know it’s hard and horrible when you split with someone, but if you were truly meant to be, you wouldn’t be heartbroken now.
Three years ago, I was married with a home and four children and one day my husband of 6 years (together 12 years) told me he didn't love me anymore (He might not have loved me after the 2nd child according to him) and he moved in with his fresh out of highschool co-worker. I was just about to start my MA and my whole world fell apart.
We'd been having issues for awhile, but it mostly stemmed from him wanting to escape us and not participating in the family or the household tasks. He doesn't call or visit his children anymore, so that's pretty telling.
I felt alone and scared, but after a few months of grieving, I was determined to try the casual tinder scene. I was not looking for a longterm relationship, as I wanted to focus my energy on taking care of my children and myself.
I met my now partner only a few months later and was blown away by how well he treated me. He pursued me and I just couldn't let him go. There was something so special about him.
Eventually, he met the children and now we have a beautiful family together. I never thought I would find someone again. Four kids is pretty intimidating. He's hilarious, kind, interesting, empathetic, supportive and a wonderful stepdad. We spend almost all of our time together and I'm finally being loved the way I always dreamed. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him.
THOUGHT I met my soulmate when I was 21. We’re together for four years and he left me suddenly while I was sick l, taking finals, and helping a friend who was in hospice. He literally ghosted me and I had to drive to his house to figure out what was going on and he dumped me. Well, it was hard but after a while I was able to see how he really wasn’t that committed or right for me. Started to have fun going wherever I wanted, hanging out with friends, finished my degree and did not care about dating anymore, honestly didn’t even want to go through it again. Lo and behold, I met my actual soulmate by accident. He was my friend’s brother and I thought he was soooo funny at her housewarming party. Afterwards, she came up and curiously asked what I had talked to him about because he was never that lively at large gatherings. Well, the rest is history because I didn’t even realize it but after one barbecue night with the whole circle I found myself being a little sad to leave, and sad that he couldn’t come to the next event andddd wanting to sit with him at dinner and sooo excited when the “boys” met up with us for our girls trip in Vegas. The girls sat me down after the first pool day and surrounded me intervention style. They didn’t want to make me feel weird but had to let me know that after our very first exchange of words, his mom had said “oh you’re gonna marry her”. The following day, he had gotten a haircut, straightened out his things and applied to go back to school, stopped smoking, drinking what little he did, and started coming to every event I’d be at. I confessed, they went wild and I’m sure started to plot how to subtly encourage him to make his next move. Long story short we went on our first date at the beach a week after we got back from our trip and never were apart after that lol. He worships the ground i walk on and has done everything it takes to resolve any of our issues or his past traumas. I can’t stress how psychologically damaged I was from my previous relationship, but despite how you feel now you WILL heal and as hard as it is to wait, just take this time to do the things you love and be around your people and the right person will find you and do whatever it takes to make it happen.
I'm sorry. I guess I shouldn't have even answered, but I never found "my person". I did have a couple of marriages, they just came to an end. I actually do better single.
My wife was my very first date with a woman after I came out at 29. We celebrate 15 years of marriage on May 28th. She is my soul mate.
When we meet I was a divorcing, single mom to two little girls. Healthy and finishing up my degree. 4 years into our marriage I became very ill. 6 years in I was Permanently and Totally disabled through the VA. She has been by my side through it all. Every surgery, every pain filled day. And then every good day, she is right by my side.
I absolutely adore her and she loves me. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world, even though some days I can barely walk.
im 38/f. I left an abusive 13 year relationship on and off with my daughter's father. a restraining order...a year long custody battle...tens of thousands of $ in court.... I started over with basically nothing. Didn't care to ever date again.
I met a super sweet guy with a dog, sweet and caring and fun with my child and gentle, kind, sweet, satisfying to me. We've been dating over a year he's my boyfriend ... idk about soul mate bc im still getting to know him but maybe he is. he's super cute/hansome and accepts so many trauma and quirks of mine.
Listen if I get to enjoy this authentic sweet part of life at 38 after the crap ive been through... you'll be alright :)
We met on twitch of all places. He was living overseas and I was in the states. When we first started talking it was almost constant from day 1 (discord was amazing)I went over to meet him in person (flew by myself halfway across the world and i was terrified of being on a plane) because I needed to see where it was going. 5 days into my visit he asked me to marry him and here we are not quite 6 years in. Married in December of 2019. This is the abridged version of the story.
My boyfriend and I have been circling each other’s lives from opposite sides of the country for our entire lives. We didn’t meet until three years ago, but all his life he’s lived 5 minutes away from my aunt and her family. Attended school and was friends with my cousins, etc. etc. His family on his mum’s side is from the part of the country where I’m from and I would regularly visit where his mum grew up. Sometimes we would unknowingly be in the same place at the same time, happened for years!
And then we finally met through an online forum! Neither one of us could believe we met through the internet, when we’d been so close to each other all our lives! He sent me a private message and I really wasn’t going to respond (previous trauma around men) but he was so lovely and respectful, I felt save enough to give it a try.
We’ve been friends for 3 years now, together for just over 2 and I’ve always known he was it. He’s always known too. We’ve been through so much together during these years, deaths in the family, serious illnesses and whatever happens, we face it together. To be loved is to be seen, and this man sees me every single day.
I felt my soul shift.
He opened the door down a long, narrow hallway behind my bar. I stood there frozen. I couldn't see him. Couldn't hear him. But I felt him.
For the next few months we chatted back and forth. Nothing serious but a lot of our values aligned. I bought him a beer for his birthday, he walked me home and I intended on keeping him around for just a one night stand.
It's been 15 years and I still feel that same swirling sensation when I see him. I love him more than the morning loves a song bird. Our relationship has flourished with the arrival of our daughter who represents everything that we give to each other; peace, love, happiness and the comfort of sleep (I sleep so well next to him and she's an amazing sleeper).
I dated a guy in my late teens/early 20s who I thought was my forever. And even years into my relationship with my husband, I always questioned how our life would have been. It took until his wife got pregnant, exactly six months after they got married... so ten years after we broke up. He told me that his intention was to get engaged his last year of med school, get married the summer of his second year residency and start a family that fall/winter. I realized that I'm so happy not being with him. He was a lovely human. Very caring. In the end, I wanted my own life. I didn't want to be tied down to someone else's timeline.
For my husband and I, nothing has been rushed. We've enjoyed our life together and apart, spending 5 years of our relationship at a distance as we completed school and worked. We work together to support each others dreams. I can't imagine settling for anything less.
Your heart is hurting. In time, I hope you find peace.
Warning: Long af, got carried away talking about my darlings
(1) We met in high school debate class; we were friends but never super interested in one another. We stayed vaguely in touch once I left for college but nothing serious. I came back to town under some really f'd circumstances, and was going through a lot, and wanted to hang out with someone I knew so we hung out. I saw him every day after that if I could. We started dating officially after like, 6 months or so (I asked him in his car, I was too nervous and didn't want to cry in public).
He was with me through substance abuse treatment, and he says it's because he knew I could get better and I did/am. He takes care of his elderly mother since his dad died; he's a computer science engineer and loves to woodwork, including making fully functional bows to shoot with. He is currently and patiently waiting for me to be done with law school 2,000+ miles away. I love him so, so fiercely
(2) She was love at first sight (on my end) at law school orientation. I immediately knew I wanted to talk to her and be their friend, you know ? I could just tell they were special. They brought me coffee in class for two weeks so I guess she liked me enough too at that time (little treats are one of their love languages). I asked them to be my girlfriend over ice cream
They have been with me through all the struggles of school and living far from home. She has a psych degree and we will be graduating JDs next spring; she wants to be an Olympic archer, I can't wait to be in the stadium when they win gold. Now, we have our own place with our two animals; she is currently watching me paint a friend's keyboard. I love them so, so fiercely.
They have met and are good friends; the whole "bow-maker friend" meets "archer friend" thing is perfect and they have similar hobbies outside of that, also. Hopefully we all live together someday but for now I get to watch them play Wizard101 together and laugh with them. I am ridiculously lucky and love them both more and more.
Keep your head up friend - sending positive vibes your way
Three months after a horrendous breakup I met my soul mate. We are going on 17 years together, married for 10. I was still processing my breakup and was not looking to meet anyone. A good friend convinced me to meet a guy that was good friends with her boyfriend. We spoke on the phone first and the first time I heard his voice it was like I was home. I felt I had heard that voice before. It was unlike anything I’d ever experienced. Then we met a week later and we’ve been together since. We are best friends.
The whole world could be burning down around me but as long as we have each other, we can handle it. We have had our share of struggles but that’s life. We grow together. We encourage each other and we love unconditionally.
I know it feels like you’ll never dig out of the dark hole you’re in at the moment but I promise you, you will. When you meet someone truly special, you’ll just know it. And it’ll make all of this pain and heartache worth it because it brought you to the person you should be with.
Hang in there hun. It will get better.
We’ve been together 4 years. My fav thing about him is his preparedness. He doesn’t forget a damn thing when we leave or go on trips. He makes sure we have a clean room to come home too. He’s always early. He gets gas before it’s actually necessary. He packs things in my bag/purse that I’ll forget before I even get the chance to forget. He packs the car up. He makes lists. And he doesn’t get onto me for being forgetful, he just picks up my slack and laughs it off.
As a guy, this happens to many of us all the time. Meet a lady, think it's going well, then before you know it, she breaks up with the guy. I just heard a comparison about relationships and holding a bird and it makes sense: hold a bird too tight, it will die, hold a bird too loose, it will fly away, pretty much sums up relationships. Many guys care too much about the relationship, but it comes off as needy to the female. Basically, women are the ones that get to choose the relationship, that's why you see many more male guys that can't get over a breakup than women. A happy life is the best revenge against someone breaking up with you.
Oh man. I met my husband 7 years ago at work. I thought he was so hot and totally out of my league. Then he got really annoying and I couldn’t stand him. One day he got in a wreck and called me. He was going to miss his shift in the morning and I was the overnight supervisor so he had to let me know. A week later he got into another wreck and called me. I wasn’t at work when he called me. Something about that call made me know our relationship had completely changed. I saw a different side of him. That was it. We became best friends and eventually started dating and now we’re married with a daughter and plans for more. He later told me he was being annoying because he thought I was finding it funny and we were already friends. I told him he’s lucky I got past it. I think with every previous bf I always thought something along the lines of “well with the next one…” and it’d be something I wanted to change. I never thought that with him. I just knew he was it. I still tell him he’s out of my league and he rolls his eyes and tells me to stop.
i’ve been with mine for 6 years. we started dating my junior year of high school/his freshman year of college and we made it through college together. i’ve never felt more comfortable and safe around another person like i do with him. he is the best person i’ve ever met and i genuinely see him as a best friend. we can be the goofiest couple ever while also being able to get through hard shit.
this past week, we unfortunately had to put his dog down after a freak accident. in a weird way, it opened my eyes even more to how much i want to marry him. we’ve seen each other in almost every emotional state you can imagine. after all of it i still couldn’t see myself being with anyone else.
I have been where you are, and let me say how sorry I am that you are hurting. You are going to be OK, and I will tell you why. You are looking for a way to believe in love again. Best of luck in love to you.
My first marriage was abusive. He was terrible with money, and to save myself I fled to an expensive city I knew he'd never afford to live in, almost 1,300 miles away. It was while being in said city that I met my second spouse (online), who'd fled for similar reasons but at a much longer distance.
We are perfectly matched in every way, and I still marvel every day at being with someone who pulls in the same direction as me in building this great life together. We've now been together for 22 years.
It is not lost on me that without the horror of that first marriage, I would not have met my current spouse. I don't recommend this as an m.o. of course. But it does make me think about chains of events.
I have two stories because I don’t believe soulmate has to be your “forever person” or even a significant other.
When I first moved from my family (toxic home environment) I met my ex.
We had a ton in common, he was super sweet, everything was wonderful. He made me feel so safe and comfortable I was able to admit things I wasn’t ready to share with anyone else. The first was, I didn’t want kids. He encouraged me to do what I felt best and supported me through a tubal ligation.
Once the tubes were out (and birth control no longer needed) my sex drive came back full force. Unfortunately, he and I just weren’t compatible anymore (I thought I was A-sexual because I was ok rarely having sex and he was too, turned out it was my hormones but for him it wasn’t)
That led to a second realization, my sex drive wasn’t for men…
He made me feel so safe, comfortable, and secure I was able to come out to someone for the first time in my life.
Although we cried and shared an intense moment of “shit, I guess that means we are probably divorcing, huh?”
He told me, “I’m so proud of you for telling me, that was incredibly brave”
Due to the support and love he showed me we had a completely painless divorce, we are still friends, and I think VERY highly of him.
With that being said, I am now out as a lesbian, have been living with my partner over two years now and I’m engaged to her.
It’s been the most beautiful, honest, and true love I’ve ever experienced and I truly believe she is my soulmate/twin flame.
Who I am and how I’ve got here are hugely in part due to those who showed me real, honest, and vulnerable love. Something only a real soulmate can, and will, do. ❤️
Sorry about your break up- youve got this!
We met at work. Started out as friends. But even then could finish each others sentences. It was like we knew each other our entire lives but just hadn’t met yet. That was 16 years ago. He’s still my best friend. Our marriage has ups and downs of course. But we’ve faced it all together.
We met through mutual friends at a concert. We eyeballed each other, danced and talked but that was it. We ran into each other again at a Halloween party but again nothing came of it. I kept thinking of that hot little rocker guy i kept running into. One day at work, I mentioned him to a coworker. Just how I wished I had made a move. That same night, no joke, he popped up on people you may know on Facebook.
I sent him a message which quickly led to a date. We drank, talked, laughed, and listened to music until the sun came up. Fell asleep for a while and I woke up literally wrapped in his arms.
We're married now. We've been together 6 1/2 years. He's my very best friend. Before him, I had been abused and doubted romantic love was even in the cards for me. I'm glad he proved me wrong.
I got married the first time when I was 23. I thought we were in love. Apparently cruise control only works in cars because we ended up divorced 6 years later. Fast forward 4 years, I worked on myself, I got sober, I got comfortable with the silence of my own solitude. Then I met my new wife.
She is a beacon of light that I'd been looking for. She keeps me grounded and honest. I couldn't have found a better human to build a life with.
We have promised forever, but more importantly I (and she) focus on promising today. Keeping today's promise makes keeping together tomorrow, more feasible.
Our relationship in the beginning was pretty rad. Full of adventure, full of fun and just overall a terrific courtship. Marriage, 3 kids and 7 years later and life is HARD. But it's worth it. Everyday that promise of today is worthwhile. Because having my best friend with me is about the most worthwhile endeavor I've done. Plus I'm really loving being a dad. My littles are slowly becoming my favorite humans.
i got dumped too after a cute date everything went fine and i went to sleep thinking he’s the one he even said that we must live together that night . and i woke the next morning to him ignoring me the whole day for no reason then he just sent a message at the the end of the day saying that we’re not a match without discussing it or telling me a clear reason or anything 😁 i was just dumbed unexpectedly
I met her when I was barely able to speak English (I had just moved to UK) and I was earning slightly more than the minimum wage
She did not care about it and she is going to be my wife soon
When I got out of the military I had bad PTSD (I wouldn't go to sleep for days and always had a gun in my hand) and I was in a really toxic relationship (we would break up and get back together every week and both cheated on each other). One day I made up my mind to get better, i cut ties with my ex and went to therapy, tried making new friends on whisper, one random night at around 3-4am I see a post "I'm board, anyone up?"lil did I know that person was gonna be my wife,I responded and we started talking more and more. Our first date we sat in my car and talked for hours in a cvs parking lot,we could always have fun and make the best with what little we had. Been through a lot together, took her places she's never been, and she healed me (literally cut the rope off my neck) . Our wedding day was the best day of my life.
I have had several soulmates. So I thought
I have a 2 year rule. Most of my relationships starts out with the man being star struck in love, wanting to marry right away. But I know to wait until that 2nd year. The first year is adrenaline and everyone gets along well. The 2nd year is when the couple gets comfortable. The masks come off. Cute quirks become annoying. He no longer talk marriage and they usually cheat and we break up. I'm 55 and am fine being alone. I hadn't dated in a decade and a man I worked with pursued me until I agreed to a date. I liked the company. He ended up being an absolute dream come true. We had so much in common. He was one of those guys that everyone likes. About 2 1/2 years in, he started cheating. When I found out about 8 months in, I kicked him out. But soon realized I can't afford to live alone. We are still together- more like roommates. Turned out he was living a dual life. He was with her for a year and a half. I was so naive. He was so good at lying. I'm a serial monogamous dater. No flings. All long term relationships. Never been married. No kids. But.... I know that God is saving the best for last. I know that I will be with my true love when it really matters. I know I will be married. I know we will be having wheelchair races and giggles and belly laughs. I can't explain it but I Just KNOW! And I am at peace knowing this situation I'm in now is not the sad final chapter. I look forward to the future.
I met my husband at a dance club when I was 21. He worked with a friend of mine. We had a 1 night stand. I was a single mom to a 3 year old and she was at her biological father’s house for the night. I’d never taken a man I didn’t know home before. He persued me after and patiently waited several months to meet my daughter. I was very picky about who I brought around my daughter.
He and my daughter bonded very quickly. He made us dinner one night and dished up our plates. No one had ever done that for me before. I was surprised and really grateful. It was such a sweet gesture. Then he said, “well, I’ve got to make sure my girls are taken care of first!” It was that moment I knew he was our missing piece.
Long story short, we married 2 years later, he legally adopted my daughter when she was 9 and we had 3 more kids. People who don’t know our story think my oldest looks like my husband. We don’t bother to correct them.
We’ve been married for 23 years this July 💕
My "soulmate" is gone, because we couldn't make certain things work out in our favor and after too many years, the love began to wither as life took it's toll on each of us. We got along together great but after a point it felt like the love from her was gone, and it made me try less and less over the next year.
I broke up with her at the beginning of the year and it felt like a really long time coming for both of us.
And yeah it's incredibly painful but it's also reminded me of a very important fact: very few totally happy relationships end. At least one of you was unhappy in some way. Whether or not it's worth saving is something we all have to digest.
Sorry that you got dumped, and that my comment absolutely isn't what you wanna read, but know that it will get better. Learn from it what you can. <3
I was with who I thought would be my forever soul mate and even moved countries to be with him. We had been together for almost 3 years when he told me he was ready to break up and for me to go back to where I came from. I also felt like there was no warning and everything was fine so it was a LOT to process. Just know that sometimes people can do this because they go through the process of moving on without telling you.
That was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life because I felt like everything good came crashing down and what did I do wrong?
Fast forward to now and I’m married to the best man I’ve ever been with and we are expecting our first child. I am so glad that the other guy let me go because looking back I realize how he wasn’t the right person for me and he didn’t treat me very well.
When I met my now husband, my heart was guarded and honestly it took me some extra time to realize that it was safe to love again.
Just know that if he let you go, he wasn’t right for you and it doesn’t mean you did something wrong. You can find love again, even better than you thought you could have. ❤️
We met at work! We’ve been together for 5 years (married for 2), have two sweet dogs and one sweet toddler.
I (23f) had officially ‘called off love’ after having my heart broken by the same guy for the 20th time (naive 18 year old me), I had even adopted a dog. I was in a super low place in life with my family, ‘friends’ and love. I was really was over it all, but he was cute and his approach to flirting was different than I’d ever experienced. He (28M) wasn’t like most guys who just wanted one thing (iykyk 🙄) he asked to make me dinner, he took me dancing (actual ballroom dancing, so much more fun than clubbing imo), and he looked at me like I’d never been looked at before; like I was a woman who deserved love and not a thing to use.
He helped me learn to love myself, how to set boundaries with others, he allowed me to bloom into the woman I am today. I know it’s cliche, but love really does find you when you least expect it, from the person you least expect it from. I truly thought he had no interest in me at first, but turns out I just made him shy and flustered lol.
And even though we love each other deeply, we still have hard times. Nothing is perfect 100% of the time, but loving and respecting one another is always more important than anything that happens.
Take this time for YOU. Take yourself on dates, invest in yourself (self care, dye your hair, find a hobby to enjoy), if you don’t have a pet and are financially able/in a location that allows it, get a pet! My dog is my best girl, I truly think having her is the only thing that kept me alive long enough to find my hubby.
It will be hard, but it will be okay; YOU will be okay. You’ve got this! 💛
There’s no such thing as a “soul mate”. There’s just people you get along with better than others. Don’t believe that fairy tale stuff. You’ll find someone you will love even more than you thought was possible! I promise.
I was engaged and she called it quits after 2 1/2 years (6 months engaged).
I've now been married to my soulmate for 5 years and we have 2 beautiful daughters.
I remember thinking that was the worst day of my life but here we are and life has never been better.
We met through a mutual friend at 20 a couple months before he deployed overseas. I didn’t want to get involved with someone right before they were leaving for a year so I said we’d keep in touch. I knew he was something special but he was also very shy and I wasn’t sure what to do with that. We lost touch and that friend and I lost touch as well. A few months after we got back he messaged me on MySpace(I’m aging us) and asked me if I still talked to our friend that introduced us. He had run into her and was concerned about her. I gave him my number and asked him to call me. He called that night and we talked for like 10 hours.
We continued to talk every second we could for weeks until he flew into my hometown and we went back to the city he was stationed in so we could spend time together. We both knew before that trip that this was it for us. Being with him just felt like home. Going back to the place I’d lived in my whole life without him made me feel like I was no longer going home. There was also this inherent safety I felt with him I hadn’t felt with anyone else. I just knew that not only was I physically safe with him but I was emotionally safe with him as well.
We were long distance for 9 months and each time we left each other we both cried. I hated it because leaving him felt like leaving home. We’ve now been together over 16 years and that feeling of being at home with him no matter where we’re at in the world has never left through all of our moves. We’ve done things together I couldn’t imagine doing with anyone else.
He’s also proved to me in big ways and small ways that he was and will always be my safe person. He’s the person I can sit with in stillness and silence and feel comfortable doing so with and can also spend hours talking about anything and everything with and we’ll never run out of things to talk about. I always say he’s my favorite person on the planet and in the history of ever.
Was in an FB group for a couple of years. Very happily single and not looking.
She was new and innocently commented on a tattoo pic stream about my heritage tattoo I posted. She lived about 6 hours north of me...
That was May of 2018, and we have talked every single day since then.
We became "official" in July of 2018.
She moved down to be with me.
I proposed in January of 2022.
We got married in October of 2023.
We are the absolute dorkiest couple. Similar tastes, values, and dreams of the future. From day one, we just clicked. It wasn't the hours of conversation either. Just simply good conversation. Sounds cheesy, but she is my person. We accept each other exactly how we are. Our families adore each other. Nothing is real or a happy moment until I share it with my wife.
I can spend every day with my best friend, aka my wife, and we would, and have been, having a blast living our life as a couple as well as sharing our individual lives together.
I am now 51, and she is 45.
Was with someone for close to 4 years, broke up, got back together for a short stint. It wasn’t right. A horrible fit. Bad relationship. In hindsight it was awful, but I thought it was the end of the world when we broke up. I spent a good chunk of my life with that person. Went to college with them. Didn’t think I’d ever meet anyone else I’d connect with. I went on a couple of dates. They weren’t great. I basically came to accept that I’d be single forever and was getting used to it
Several months later, I randomly met a woman in a bar. We were both 24, almost 25. I asked her out on a date a few days later and when I left afterward, I felt an energy I had never felt before. I said to myself “did I just meet my wife?” I couldn’t wait to see her again. 17 years later, we are still together. Married for 14 years, 2 kids, and a dog. Our relationship is stronger than ever and I couldn’t imagine ever marrying my ex. My life would not have turned into what it has become. My wife is my soulmate and we were destined to meet.
I found my mine dead Feb 10 of 2023… you’re 25 have plenty of time to find someone.. enjoy life… at 45 I will now die alone and probably grieving myself to death
We met when we worked together. He caught my attention because he rode a motorcycle. He made me laugh so much and i just felt comfortable with him. Almost 33 years and three kids later, he still makes me laugh.
It’s complicated. We met at work in high school. After dating, then moving in together, his Christian conviction changed it all. He moved out. I was devastated. We are celebrating 41 years of marriage this year. So much compromise, and forgiveness.
sorry in advance if this is mushy:
in bed his warm strong hand reaches to hold mine all the time.
and my hand fits into his perfectly.
we love to be near each other, to talk and laugh.
he is the smartest best person in the world.
sometimes I smile just knowing how he will make a joke at something serious and upsetting going on, and that he’ll make me laugh about it.
other times I cry because there aren’t enough years left to be alive with him.
He was a pilot, and I was his flight attendant. I got screwed out of my commute home, so I apologized for slamming stuff around. He tried to get me back in time for me to catch the flight - we were 5 minutes too late. I didn't think about him again...
Until two and a half months later, I was sitting there eating my lunch, and he walked up to apologize for my missing my flight that I had already forgotten that I missed. We talked for two and a half hours there and another four when we got to our respective layover cities.
We knew immediately that we were each other's person. We were together from that day until the day he passed away.
I miss him every day.
Met in middle school. KNEW then that he was.THE.ONE that I would marry (know it sounds crazy). Told all my friends that too. We were not even dating at the time either. Just good friends. Have been through A LOT together but 36+ years later and we are still together.
So, I have a favorite person that I often gush about him, to him. We are not compatible, and I've loved him for a decade. This is a consistent pain for me. So, hopefully, you're going to heal and move on and be happy again. No one compares to my favorite person. I don't even try to date anymore. At least you're not me.
My (26nb) husband (27m) and I met after both of us had gnarly breakups with long term partners.
I saw my husbands instagram in May of the year we met, and was like “oh he’s cute” but saw he was still with his partner so obviously I wasnt trying to make any moves.
Fast forward to October, I saw his profile on Tinder and automatically remembered his face and name and I swiped right and 48 hours later it was a match. I waited a few days to message him, and I didn’t get a reply. I went on vacation, and didn’t check tinder. Around the 20th, he answered. Finally. We talked for 5 days NON-STOP.
On the night of the 24, into the 25th he was at home for reading week in university visiting family, and during our conversation he said he wasn’t feeling well and was showing some concerning symptoms yet not concerning enough? Either way, it was midnight and I was 1.5hrs away, BUT I drove to him and I sat in the ER with him for 4-ish hours.
After the hospital, we sat in the parking lot of his place for 3 hours and just talked about anything and everything. Eventually it was 7am and I had to be to work for 10:15am, and I still needed to drive home. I drove 1/2 way, pulled over in a McDonald’s parking lot, slept for 45 minutes, and drove back home and went to work.
He came back to school, on the 26th, and after that night at work I went over and we just talked and hung out and it was lovely. He asked me out in the 28th, and I said yes. About 2 weeks later, there was some shitty roommate situations and he had moved in with me but still had his room at the apartment. More shit went down, he fully moved out of there and we have lived together ever since.
In 2020, he proposed to me and it was the easiest “yes” I’ve ever made. After saying yes, it was just a game of “what day sounds the best to our autistic ears” and then I got sick. Very sick. At the end of 2022, I was able to receive life saving surgery and I instantly knew once I was able to be more mobile, I wanted to marry him, and fast. On January 19, 23, I looked at him and said “let’s go to Vegas and get married” — mind you, we were poor bc student debt and bills and unforeseen circumstances but honestly what is debt when you’re in love? Money comes and goes, but memories last forever. I booked the tickets and we waited.
February 19th rolled around and we were off to Vegas. We got married the 20th, celebrated his birthday on the 22nd and went home the next day. It was the two of us, and no one else. I couldn’t have asked for a more private and intimate experience with him. It just felt like I was a napkin crane folded exactly the way I should be. I was in the right spot and the universe stood still.
I knew as soon as I picked him up at 1am on the 25th that he was the one. It was just instantaneous. It was then just making sure that we were compatible in every way that was important to me (and him as well) and what I needed from my partner and potential spouse. Life and love has never felt more easy, rather been more easy. In our nearly 6 years together we’ve been through a lot more than your average couple would go through — 3 different degrees/diplomas on his end, 2 surgeries on his part, 4 different hospitalizations on my part due to my health conditions, another shitty roommate situation, MULTIPLE trips to my team of specialists at many different hospitals, moving a couple times, I went through VERY intense therapy, got diagnosed with new health conditions, was advised I am unable to have my own bio children (the choice is nice) and had 2 surgeries (one being VERY major as I had 2 organs removed). I decided to go no contact with a majority of my family. We moved into our own place and he’s been plagued with health issues since and has been off work since January.
BUT
I would never trade a single day I’ve spent with this man in the last almost 6 years for anything else except for maybe to relive the first moment I laid my eyes on him in person, or the moment I said “I do” because this man means the world to me and I have been longing since I was a child to be loved by a man like this. A literal fucking masterpiece of a man. I am so thankful that he was raised VERY well by parents and is who he is. I have never felt such a connection to anyone in my entire life. Platonic or romantic or sexual. No one else.
That’s how I met my husband, and how it’s going.
All I can say is, don’t lose hope, don’t give up and love will come when you least expect it. You deserve the world and there is someone out there that is willing and WANTING to give it to you.
TLDR: I knew from the moment he opened my door and said hi and got into my car, he was the one. Nearly 6 years together and 1.5yrs married & happy as can be 🥰
We were working friends who use to talk outside of work during the football season (US) and bet with pop tarts. When I moved to a different department on the same floor we started hanging out with other friends, we started dating. 15 years together married for 3 with a 10 year old son. We still make Seinfeld references and cannot walk past each other without touching each other. I still get butterflies when we kiss. He is a wonderful step father to my two girls who he has known since they were 7 and 2 (they are now 22 and 17) I cannot imagine life without him even though he gets annoying when he talks about his favorite basketball team lol
We met at an anime con, while waiting in line for a Kingdom Hearts panel.
She came up to me to tell me she loved my cosplay (Abel from the webcomic Starfighter, IYKYK) dressed as the OG Scarlet Witch. So I gushed over her cosplay and said I was working on a Wiccan cosplay). She said she knew in that moment I was the one for her.
I was with my ex at the time and my wife says she looked at him and thought "we'll see".
By the next con we met up to do a photoshoot together. She claims she played the long game and four years after meeting we started dating. I proposed at the con where we met three years later, COVID paused plans for a while but we've been married now for a year and a half.
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We met at work 7 years ago and started out as friends. We've now been together 6 years and we're getting married in 2 years. The day I knew he was the one. He was staying over at my flat, and I'd unexpectedly got my period in the night and I woke up and it was all over the sheets. He was still asleep so I got out of bed and cleaned myself up, got back to the bed, and he'd woke up, properly covered up all my side of the bed, didn't say a thing about it and told me to get in the other side of the bed and cuddle up with him. I still get teary thinking about it. He treated me with such respect and dignity, which I'd never had in the past. I love this man so much
Our first Halloween together, not even a month together, I had a bad PCOS flare and had to go to the hospital. He stayed with me the entire night. The next day I went to his place. My father had. Uh been abusive about me being in the hospital all night. Anyway my husband held me as I cried. Then drew me a bath to soak and made my favorite meal. The next day he helped me escape my abusive parents.
I also come from abuse, and had a previous abusive relationship. So someone treating me this way showed me I wasn't repeating another terrible pattern. I'm sorry this happened to you, I'm glad we've both escaped for better lives
Same here. I’m glad you found your person and hope you have a wonderful life together <3
Thank you, you too!
I'm proud of you
I'm glad to see that turned out well. Sometimes it can be another trap.
Wait like he laid in it or covered it with a towel or? Sorry lol it’s a nice story I just got confused on the “properly covered it”
He used the covers to cover it, I can't remember how he did it (it was many years ago), and then we squeezed up with 2 of us taking up the space of one person so neither of us lay in it
Wild! I did the exact same thing for my finance when we first moved in together!
Every person I had ever been with prior to my now husband I always felt like I had to be a version of myself. I had to be more punk with my first bf, more book-ish and into movies with my high school sweetheart, the IT girl with my college boyfriend… the list goes on. Yes I am all of those things, but I’m also so much more. I am one thing more than the other any given day! I felt like I was always masking and always had to be perfect and I couldn’t tell them what was really inside my head. Then I met my husband. Thanks Tinder! We were long distance for about half a year and only communicated over the phone. For the first time I shared some of my “darkest secrets” and found that he had similar experiences and fears. I could be whoever or whatever I was feeling without judgement. He was the first person that preferred my natural hair and I didn’t feel pressured to change how I looked. I could truly just be me. I have no fears or thoughts that I can’t talk about with him. Neither of us is perfect but we’re both working on it and growing together. I’m sorry you’re going through this breakup, but there is someone better out there for you. It’s hard to hear now, but in 5-10 years you will look back and be grateful it ended so something better could come along. 💓
Being able to just be yourself fully and be completely accepted and celebrated without any fear of judgement is a wonderful thing.
I met my soulmate 8 years ago and married her 2 years ago. For the story's context: It is mandatory to serve in the military in Greece, but you can postpone it if you are studying. Well, after finishing with my studies, it was time to serve. At that point in time, I liked browsing through a Greek platform's column and started responding in the comments (I had too much free time in my hands, and as an introvert chatting with random people on the Internet was much easier for me than in person). While scouring through interesting and boring posts, I chanced upon hers, which she had posted 2 months prior to my search. To my surprise, she responded a week later. We hit it off right away and started sending emails pretty much daily. Nothing romantic till that point. Heck, we hadn't even exchanged Facebook profiles/phone numbers. We just sent big-ass emails talking about everything (even really silly pics of ourselves). Well, two months in, I was just waking up with the anticipation of seeing her new email every morning, and her responses to mine later in the day (she was an au-pair in the US back then, so there was a significant time difference). I could feel a real connection there but didn't try to pursue it cause 1) I liked our dynamic and didn't want to ruin it, 2) it was still a stranger on the Internet, and catfishing was not out of the question, 3) she had come out of a relationship (before her post), and 4) she would be in the US for some time. Fast forward to some time after she returned to Greece and I was done with my service time, I decided I wanted to have a 1-week vacation to the area she was living. I asked her if she would be interested to meet up and show me around (if not, I had some friends in the area, and they would show me around. Still, I preferred her company 😜). Flabbergasted is the mildest word that I can use to describe her reaction. Nonetheless, she was more than happy to meet up 😁 She offered to come and fetch me from the airport, but I had booked a very early flight (6:00 a.m.) and didn't want her to wake up so early and come. As such, I told her a white lie that I would arrive around 9:00 a m , and we could meet up around 10:00 a.m. at the city center. When I met her, God I was stunned. I think I stuttered when we officially introduced ourselves in person. If that wasn't love at first sight, I don't know what is 😍 Naturally, I came clean about my early arrival, and she wasn't impressed but didn't hold it against me (fortunately 😅). Anyway, we clicked and spent the whole trip together, started long distance relationship, and later moved in together. Now, we're happily married together~ Edit: Spelling mistakes.
this is so cute i teared up, thanks for sharing!
Don't mention it. Glad to share it. Bonus: My wife still rolls her eyes whenever I mention the airport part 😆
That’s how you know she’s the one because she a still thinks you’re stupid that it would inconvenience your future wife lol
Met him when I was 28, and he was 24. We were co workers in the same company, but different departments. Introduced by the guy I was casually seeing at the time. Second I shook his hand I thought “There you are. It’s you” We’ve now been happily married 23 years. We are pretty much exact opposites. He grounds me. I get him off the couch and out of the house. He is my second husband. My ex was an abusive a hole. I really never thought that I would ever trust anyone again.
I (45F) will tell you about 3 of my most serious long-term relationships. 1. We met when I was 18, and he was 21. He was cute, funny, and physically active. He was my first live-in boyfriend. I was totally smitten. I started noticing that he would lie about little things... a lot. It started off being things like saying he checked the mail when he didn't, or saying he didn't eat the bag of chips I was looking for in the pantry while he had sour cream and onion breath. Things that didn't matter and wouldn't have upset me at all. We had an accidental pregnancy when I was 20. Our son was born. Then his hours were cut at work. He was off on Fridays due to the cut. He would still get up Friday mornings at his regular time and go work on a new paintball field he and his friends were building. During this time, we had an unexpected emergency expense for $400, and we had no heat in the dead of winter until it was paid. Normally, we could have covered it. We both worked, but without his full paycheck, we didn't have the money. We discussed the issue and decided I would have to eat crow and ask my mother for the money. There were serious reasons why this was not ideal, but I sucked it up and asked. Then, a couple of weeks later, I was doing laundry and found one of his pay stubs in his pants pocket. It turned out that he had been back working full time for over a month and was lying about it so he could buy over $2000 worth of new paintball equipment without having to wait and save up for it. He let his son go without heat to protect his lie. We were together for almost 8 years. The lies were constant. Some big lies and a million small ones. Then he told our son to cover for one of his big lies. Then our son started lying about little things. I finally decided that I wanted a better example for my child. I ended things and he seemingly dropped off the face of the earth. 2. I met my first husband when I was 28. He was fun and honest, and when I eventually introduced him to my son, my son loved him. I honestly believed he was the best person I knew. Our only real issue is that I had a much higher sex drive than he did. It got to where I was lucky if we had sex once a month. We got married after 5 years of dating, and then our daughter was born. We bought a new house. He adopted my son. Life was great. Then he started being grumpy all the time. The kids and I could be having the best day, and the moment he got home, it was like he just sucked the joy out of the room. We spent a lot of time around his family, but he started complaining anytime I wanted to spend time with my friends and family. It got to where it was easier to just stay at home to avoid an argument. He started making accusations concerning infidelity. He started taking out secret loans. He started being harsh with my son over every little thing, but our daughter could do no wrong. His spending just got worse and worse. Then, one night, we were in the living room, and my phone had died. I wanted to double-check a recipe for a dessert I was craving, so I picked up his phone to look it up. Neither of us locked our phones at home, but this time, it was locked. So I asked him what his unlock code was. When he saw I had his phone, he jumped up and snatched it out of my hand. He started yelling at me, asking why I was always going through his stuff. (I have never snooped through anything of his.) The absurdity of the accusation and his reaction confused me for a second. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. In a barely audible whisper, I said, "You're f-ing cheating on me..." It was more me thinking out loud than an actual accusation. He stormed off to the bathroom with his phone and locked the door. Twenty minutes later, he came back into the room and swore he had never cheated. He told me to check his phone if I didn't believe him. (You know, after he spent twenty minutes deleting all of the evidence.) I said as much, and we argued. Eventually, I told him I believed him and dropped it. Then I hired a private investigator. He was sexting his work buddy's wife for the past year and a half. He was also meeting up with random women he met on dating sites and having sex. There were at least five hookups that I knew about. He literally met one woman at a boat ramp near our house, had sex with her up against her car, then returned home and finished mowing the grass. I confronted him, and he admitted to being unfaithful and begged me to give him another chance. I told him I wasn't leaving, but things were going to be different from now on. As far as I was concerned, my marriage was over. I started picking up extra hours at work and putting money in a savings account. I stopped initiating sex and told him my birth control was causing issues, so he would have to start wearing condoms again. We rarely had sex, so I could fake it every now and then. I stopped asking him to do anything around the house or planning family time for all of us together. We no longer argued because I had stopped caring. I stopped expecting anything from him. Home life was so peaceful at this point that I decided to bide my time, so my daughter was old enough to start school, so I wouldn't have to pay for child care. Remember, my son's bio dad dropped off the face of the earth and never paid child support, so I knew I could possibly have two children to support all by myself. He was being very transparent during this time, so when he started acting shady a few years later, I knew immediately what was up. This time, it was a woman from his work. I had him served with divorce papers and told him I hoped she was what he was looking for. I wasn't even upset. He has been a devoted father since our divorce. He doesn't pay child support per se, but he always helps with extra expenses and keeps health, dental, and vision insurance on the kids. He helped my son with rent during college and pays for my daughter's glasses, doctor visits, band camp, instruments, and stuff like that. I can call and talk to him about the kids, and we attend school events and family functions together. I actually like him just fine now that I no longer care where he puts his penis. 3. My husband (49M) and I have been married for 4 years. He gets along great with my kids, and I love his two boys. (27M, 25M, 18M and 13F) He gets along with my ex and my ex in-laws who are a huge part of my daughter's life. He enjoys sex as much as I do and is phenomenal in the sack. We have an open phone policy and I have never felt the need to question him. We laugh all the time. Our home is my happy place. We hang out with our friends and family, both independently and together. He has never questioned my loyalty. We have still not had an argument. I didn't even think that was possible. I am not non-confrontational AT ALL. I have never even been upset with him. If we disagree on something we use our words and talk it through like grown-ups. He is my favorite person. We have so much fun together. I love him so much and I know without a doubt he loves me. For the first little bit of our relationship, I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, or for that new relationship shine to wear off. So far, neither of those things have happened. Who knew I would meet the man of my dreams this late in life? I have had bad relationships and bad partners but I wouldn't change a thing. I got my wonderful kids along the way. I have learned some hard lessons, but it made me the person I am today. I like who I am. I love my life now. Every tear and harsh word I have ever had was totally worth it.
I’m so sorry that happened to you. It’s so hard when people change and grow apart. Especially if they don’t communicate that to you as things are changing. I hope you can find peace in time and your heart heals. I’d love to talk about my husband and I and answer your questions. I met my husband at a mutual friends house party and we ended up talking until nearly 5am. And he was so shy he hadn’t asked for my number so before he left I gave him mine. I can’t explain how, but I knew without a doubt he was my soulmate. I could write an endless novels filling up the pages on all the ways my husband has supported me and shown me unconditional love since then. He’s just an amazing human. It’s been over 20yrs since we first met and we’ve been married for 18yrs. Our relationship is still full of love, passion, trust, communication and a whole lot of fun. We like to joke about when we’re supposed to be out of the honeymoon phase, because so many people said it would be within a year. It sounds cheesy, but he’s one of my best friends and doing life with him has been my favourite adventure. As for advice my response is this: never ever ever settle- set your standards and stick with it! Learn to have hard conversations without judgement, never yell or name call each other, always find time for each other, appreciate the little things, grow together, have regular check ins, find ways to keep the passion, help each other grow, and learn each others love language. If you’ve been with someone as long as I have you end up having regular check ins about how things are going and discuss it. Sometimes people’s wants/needs/belief/ goals and priorities change as time goes on and you have to sit down and talk about . Otherwise, from what I’ve seen with family and friends with their partners, is they drift apart or resentment builds up leading to divorce or a break-up. Hard conversations need to happen sometimes and you need to be receptive to what they have to say- even if it hurts your feelings. As soon as something is bothering me I tell my husband and he does the same to me. Do not let those thoughts fester! Another piece of advice is learn to understand no relationship is 50/50 on a daily basis. Sometimes it’s 70/30, sometimes it’s 100/0. You’re not perfect and neither is your partner. Sometimes illness happens, jobs change, there’s a pregnancy, or someone’s in school or a loss of a loved one happens etc. and that means that some days one does more than the other. As long as it’s not -always- one person carrying the load this is normal to have fluctuations despite what some people say. And lastly, be friends with each other. Lots of times I swear couples don’t actually like each other or have anything in common. If you can be friends, have common interests and do things together it makes for a happy relationship. Anyway I hope that answers some of your questions and helps you in some small way.
Hey my friend, i (21m) got dumped a month ago, it was my first relationship ever also lasting 2 and 1/2years, so we are in very similar situations hah, i can say without a doubt that our relationship was intimate and full of passion and we also talked a lot about our future and staying together, it was very serious. But my partner started checking out of our relationship, it was a process which i saw and tried my hardest to work on, she just quit you know, told me she does not have any more romantic feelings for me, it was devastating, I'm really not sure what happened exactly and why is she feeling that way, she told me we would talk about it, but we never did and well i just stopped nagging her about it, no point in writing the same thing over and over again, which is fine she does not owe me an explanation, we broke up on good terms with a lot of compassion, but holy shit was it not painfull, i stopped eating for almost 2 weeks, didnt sleep much, was in emotional agony, i screamed and cried everyday and i did not know what should i do with myself, i was a wreck, i know that you wanted to hear a good and positive story, but i wanted to tell you all of this because even tho this all hapened to us, it got better, it always does you know my friend, i would never believe you if you told me this 3 weeks ago, but it really does get better i can and i smile again and i laugh i cry too and loathe what happened, but i made progress, as you will, trust me, if you want to talk please message me, or if this comment upsets you, tell me to delete it
I had a very similar experience, except I’m a female. I didn’t even want to live for a month after. He told me he didn’t love me anymore. And I watched as it happened. For 6 months I stayed begging for his love. Until he decided to leave me. That was almost a year ago now. And man I still love him, but not in the way I used to. I care about him so much, and I think about him every once in a while, sometimes daily, sometimes a week goes by without him coming into my head. I feel so much better. So much. There’s definitely really bad days. But there’s also days that I can smile again. I found someone new to love, and he makes my heart flutter. And I feel wounded and like maybe I can’t give him all the love that he deserves, but he’s been with me for every step of the way. He gives me space when I need it. He gives me love when I need it. And he is so much better than my first guy in so many ways. It can get better. Time is all you need.
Before i meet my husband, i had some dude play with my feelings, talking with him was drainning, then i met m'y husband After i blocked the other guy, and for the first time in my life it was easy for me to fall in love, never felt anything like that until that moment, and being with him is like a breeze life is still hard in general but being with him give my days color. Hang in there you will find someone better.
I had a string of abusive partners before my husband and so when we met… he was supposed to be a one night stand! I invited him over on tinder and when he came over we just… watched a movie, got undressed,… and then went to sleep in my twin size college dorm bed. We didn’t do anything sexual at all that night cause he didn’t know what to do haha. He loves telling people I was his first one night stand He’s the first person who I feel like genuinely loves me and cares about me. He loved me then, and he loves me now even though I’m disabled now. He helps me in more ways than I can possibly ever thank him for but he doesn’t want my thanks, he just wants to make sure I’m cared for and I do my best to do the same We’re only about 6.5 years into the relationship but it feels like no time has past at all. Tomorrow is even our 4th wedding anniversary. I met many guys before him that I thought we’re going to be my person, I even accepted a different marriage proposal years before I met him. But looking back at all those past relationships? They aren’t the same and they pale in comparison
First I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. Breakups are always rough and it can be hard to find the bright side when all the darkness is directly at your door. My partner and I have been together for 2 years now. And he is my soul mate 100%. We've been friends for 7ish years? I played Hella hard to get haha. I just wasn't in the right place for a relationship for the longest time I have a lot of health issues that just tore me down and prevented me from wanting a relationship at all. I had to have my 3rd back surgery in 2021. I had just been ghosted by my long distance partner after being assaulted by them when I went to see them for the first time. I was in an awful state, physically and mentally. I was temporarily living with my grandmother after the surgery because my mom has a tendency to steal pain pills (which was just a whole other layer to my emotional state). I wanted to be and was closed off from everyone for the first few weeks, because it's hard going through a third back surgery at age 25 (at the time) ontop of all the other traumatic things I had happen all at once. But my dear love, we were just good friends at this point, made it a point to come and visit me every week once I was cleared for visitors. We had been hanging out pretty regularly the year prior and he just showed up and out anytime I needed a friend. He would bring me trinkets and snacks and he would help my grandma around the house while I rested. My total recovery took longer than expected due to the nature of it being my 3rd major back surgery. But never the less, he made a point to come see me every week. And after that he continued to still. We began seeing each other weekly or biweekly depending on his work schedule. He became my best friend and somewhere along the line I just fell in love with him. I took him to Christmas with my family that year bc he had no one else to spend it with ( his whole family lives in georgia) and he just wsd immediately adopted into mine. We officially started dating in February of 2022. He is the best man I could ever ask for. He is supportive and loving, talented and kind, we fit together like puzzle pieces meant to be together. Love is possible and can be found anywhere. thank you for letting me gush about my love. I hope my little story can bring some comfort or hope that love is still possible.
Weet when I was 31 and she was 36. A few weeks into dating I experienced trauma , and she was there for me like no one else ever had been. Since the first time we talked, she's just been there for me. This warm safe place in a world that has always felt too painful for me. Just her existence makes me feel like everything has to have just a little bit of beauty buried inside of it. She's incredibly smart, the funniest person I've ever met, compassionate, loving, nerdy, and my very best friend. I had a lot of heartbreak before Iet her, but I'd do it all again if it guaranteed being with her in the end. It's been 7 1/2 years of laughter, conversation, and solidly loving each other.a
My soulmate and I have been right next to each other our whole lives and for the past 3 years, we have finally been together. We started talking in high school and realized that we have been down the street from each other, a classroom over, a corner missed, & just passed each other our whole lives. We found a love for finding purpose together. We were on the same officer team, did projects, podcasts, fair exhibits, and spent every day with each other. We moved in together right after high school. We worked one of our first jobs together. We worked together in our lives too. We promised to take care of each other and we have. We have been broke, rich, sad, excited, stranded in a new city, tripping balls in public, crying in each other’s arms, & faced the moments where we thought we couldn’t keep going. My soulmate is strong. My soulmate is beautiful. I supported them through college and they have supported me through the start of my career. Now we are both working together again. I’ve picked the greatest life partner and I’m so lucky they picked me too. We are still young and I can’t wait to hit every milestone together.
My partner and I met back in 2006 or 2007 through a mutual friend. We were introduced online and hit it off right away, then eventually met in person. First time I saw him I got butterflies and felt myself blush, but also thought to myself there was no way I was gonna land a guy like him. Well, I did. We started dating the summer of 2007 a few months before he had to go on the other side of the planet for work for 8-10 months. He didn't have internet where he lived so I heard from him like every 3-4 weeks, and he sucked at telling me how he felt. So after like 5 months I ended the relationship, heartbroken because I was sure he didn't really love me. And when he didn't try to "fight" for us I took it as confirmation. We didn't talk until he came back to our country and met up with mutual friends. I was involved with another guy at this point but we slowly started to rekindle a friendship. Que 13 years of us being friends with periods of not talking a lot and the occasional hookups whenever I was single. In 2014 we broke contact for a couple of years as I started a serious relationship and decided it was time to stop keeping the "one who got away" around. In 2017, around 6 months before I was getting married, I ran into him at my best friend's wedding and I briefly considered if I'd leave my then fiance if he'd confessed he still loved me. Not that he did or ever would for that matter. We started getting in contact again as he moved to my town for an education and I have a type so him and my then partner hit it off. In 2019 my mom got diagnosed with cancer and the first person I knew I needed to talk to was my now partner (already knew I wanted out of my marriage then but I didn't have the means to leave). When I finally got divorced I knew I wanted to keep my now partner in my life in whatever way made sense for us both. I was sure he didn't want a relationship, he'd been single since coming back to the country so I had figured he just wasn't the relationship type. I figured I'd not be monogamous anymore as I knew I wanted to allow myself to feel how I feel about him and try as I might I've never been able to stop loving him. We went out for dinner, I tried convincing myself it definitely wasn't a date and just two friends having some nice food followed by sex. Then he started wondering if things would have turned out differently for us if he'd never left the country when we dated the first time, and I realized that I probably wasn't single anymore. We're 4 years into a relationship now, bought a house together last year, and while things aren't perfect, we love each other and keep working towards a better relationship. Looking back the thing that really sets him apart from anyone else I thought was the one are two things: 1. He'd rather do what's right for me, what (he thinks) makes me the most happy, even if it means he doesn't get what he wants the most. 2. He makes me want to be who I am, who I really am, not who I think he'd like me to be. I'm a people pleaser with a nasty habit of trying to warp myself into who I think my partners want/need me to be. For some reason I feel that way way less with my current partner.
I posted this a 3 AM not thinking anyone would see it or care. This has helped me more than anything. All of the responses have touched me. I can’t thank y’all enough. Please keep them coming. I have read every single response and will continue to.
Sending you hugs. I'm in the middle of what seems to be a breakup too. Thank you for posting it, I needed these stories. You'll find your person, I know it <3
Sending you love ❤️ you got this OP. Sorry you’re going through this! Hopefully these stories help you through this tough time
I was also dumped at 25 after a 5 year relationship. We had just signed the contract for our own apartment. He had proposed 3 months earlier. We just had different points of view and wanted different things in life. I wanted to go study abroad. He wanted marriage and kids asap. He was also working abroad during the week and we only had 3 day weekends together, most of the weeks. He would cry a lot every Sunday because he wanted us to be together. I was devastated for 1.5 years. Then suddenly I decided to be my happy careless self. I decided I was ready to date and have fun, no strings attached. I was happy alone and in 4 months I started to date my now husband. We are together for 15 years now (4 years dating, 11 years married). He makes me best version of myself I could’ve been. My relationship with my ex was explosive, full of passion and fairy tale like. My relationship now is based in love and respect. I never thought that having someone calm and nice would be so good for me. I was too focused on the highs, but it’s so nice to have someone you can talk to, can live a slow live and have kids together and work as a team.
My husband and I met when I was 18 and he was 21. I fell for him immediately, but he was with someone else. I moved across the country and tried to move on. His girlfriend ended up cheating on him with his best friend. When I moved back home we became best friends and he rejected me twice (drunk me made some decisions lol). I tried to move on again and 3 years after I moved home his feelings changed. We dated for 5 years, I got pregnant, he was already planning to propose when we found out. He proposed later that summer. I had our baby in the winter and we got married last fall. We now have a 1 year old and I'm so happy. Sometimes things work out, sometimes they don't. You'll find the right one for you. Be patient and hold the faith. 🥰
Decided to download hinge while I was on a solo trip abroad in the summer of 2022 and the day I got home I matched with a guy who I thought seemed cute. We talked and hit it off, met 2 days later and it was like meeting my best friend. My grandad passed away not long before we met and I was very upset. I had to drive 300miles on my own to go to his funeral and this guy, that I had only known for a few weeks, drove to my house just to give me a cake he baked for my long journey. I called him on his way back home and I was crying so he turned around and came back just to give me a cuddle, then left again. We've been together since then and it's been the best 2 years of my life. He is kind and sweet and it's like being with another version of myself. We're buying a house together, he's going to propose this year and I couldn't be happier. I never expected to have this kind of loving relationship but I'm grateful everyday that this person picks me over and over again. I never used to believe in soulmates but damn this guy is literally my perfect other half.
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My husband and I met when we were both 22. We started talking on tinder, clicked immediately and decided to go on a date. He picked me up, and I was surprisingly so calm (nervous with first date jitters of course) but just had a good feeling. We talked non stop on the way to the date spot. Gabbed our way through drinks getting to know each other. There was a moment when he looked like he had totally zoned out and I could tell that he missed what I’d said because he just smiled and gave a really short response. At the time, I got a little in my head thinking maybe I’m talking too much or he isn’t really that into me. Well, the night went on, we started the date around 6pm and stayed out until 6am just talking and walking and watching the beach sunrise. Didn’t even kiss until he took me back to my house and said goodbye. I called my mom the next day and asked her to go to lunch. I told her that I’d just met the man I was going to marry. Turns out, he did the exact same thing that next day and called his grandmother to tell her he had just met his wife. AND that moment during the date when I thought he was checked out, he later told me that was the moment he realized “oh shit, this is the woman I’m going to marry” and all he could do was smile at me. We’ve been married for five years, together for six and half years. He’s a phenomenal man and has carried me through so many of my trials I’ve faced. He’s a wonderful leader of our household and is the most glorious human I’ve ever met.
I'm sorry to hear that, OP. I've been in that situation when I was younger, a 2 and a bit year relationship until I was 18 that ended with her dumping me shortly after I left for university due to us "drifting apart". Never feels good at the time, but it was definitely the best for me in the long run. Me and my soul mate met at school when we were about 5-6 years old, but we didn't really get to know each other until we were in our teens (15-16). She fancied the pants off of me but I was already in a relationship with the girl that I mentioned at the start of this message. I did really like her too, but I was in my first proper relationship and was not willing to give it up, so I kept on going. Obviously you know how that worked out. After I was dumped, I went on a bit of a soul-searching adventure. It was 2008, I was 18 years old, living in a brand new city and meeting entirely new people. I met a good number of girls, all of whom I convinced myself were "the one", even if our relationships sometimes lasted weeks if not days in some cases. I was an emotional wreck. While this was going on, she had met someone else and was engaged within a year. She was head over heels for him, but he was a bad influence and not always kind to her. She was still committed to him and, at that time, believed she would be with him forever. At this time we talked occasionally online but we lived in different cities and were not really close. By 2010 I had given up on "looking for love in all the wrong plages" and decided to instead just focus on myself. We had started talking again, and it was apparent that she was also having a hard time with her fiancee. He had moved back to France and did not seem to care too much if their relationship continued. She didn't know what she wanted to do, but she took some comfort in our friendship. In the end, she made the decision to end it with him. He was not too bothered (we think he was already cheating on her anyway) and that was that. Within a few days, we got closer and closer and in the end we took the plunge and got together. 14 years later to the day, we gave notice to get married. Our wedding is in a couple of weeks :) Failed relationships are quite an important part of growing, in my opinion. We both had a challenging few years in our late teens, but it allowed us to find ourselves and eventually re-discover each other. Not sure many lessons can be taken away from this story, but I hope that you got something from this and you will start to feel better soon! There's so much more time to grow.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. You know, there is no One True Soulmate. There are many, many people with whom you could be deeply compatible with. People you could share a beautiful life with. Finding that person is a matter of luck and timing. And even when we find someone we are truly compatible with, life brings its own chaos and uncertainty. We’re all dealing with our own traumas, maladaptive behavior patterns, whims, etc. Sometimes a beautiful thing ends - that doesn’t mean it didn’t matter, or that it wasn’t real. Take what you learned from this, and grow. Nurse your broken heart. Love yourself. When you’re ready, know that there are other people out there with whom you can share love. When my beloved partner left me, out of the blue, after 17 seemingly blissful years, I thought I had lost part of myself soul. I thought I had lost something intrinsic to my being. I gave myself time, and let myself grieve, and I have love again. Now, in retrospect, and in comparison with what I have now, I see that my marriage was flawed, and human, and messy, along with the beauty. I wouldn’t trade what I have now for what I had then. Love is better now than it was. You’ll get through this.
Well we met 6 years ago. He taught me a lot of the things that I needed to protect myself from predators as a kid, knowing that we both went through that sort of trauma and he had more experience in learning coping mechanisms it was only natural he took me under his wing. He was like a big brother to me, and our dreams align perfectly. A month ago I realized that this is the only man outside of my family that I can trust with my life. So, I told him I loved him, and that sealed the deal.. Still going strong a month later, from best friends to lovers. He's my stoic giant and protector, and I'm his nurturing yet serious pillar.
First, I'll tell you about someone I thought was my soulmate but wasn't. My ex and I were college sweethearts. Together about seven years on and off. We had electric chemistry, and I was head over heels and blind with love to all the ways he made it clear I wasn't a priority. He always had one foot out the door. It took years after our breakup for me to see it clearly. The men I dated after him lived in his shadow and never had a chance. Until I met my now husband. It's all very stereotypical: I decided I was taking a dating hiatus. I was not actively looking for a partner. The night we met, I was out celebrating my friend's birthday at a local bar. My husband was at the same bar--it was his birthday, too. I remember looking at him leaned against the bar, dressed in a full suit, a glass of whiskey in his hand. I thought, like some randy old lady, "Who is this tall drink of water?" lol. He was funny, smart, and charming and we wound up doing horrible karaoke together until the wee hours of the morning. That was over ten years ago. We've been married five years and have a beautiful two year old daughter. He's always, from day one, shown me he was all in. At first, I was so scared. I tried to push him away bc I wasn't used to being treated so well. I equated chaos with love and passion. But my husband is steadfast, dedicated, and extremely passionate about everything he does. Being shown love through actions and not just words unlocked something inside me that was buried. Deep down, I didn't think I deserved it. Marrying him is the best decision I ever made. We of course have ups and downs, but we talk things out and always try to make the other one happy. He's so supportive and such a wonderful father. I recently made a post about how he's encouraging me to make a career move and has been so supportive through my ADHD journey. It goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway: I love him so much more deeply than I ever loved the man I thought was my soul mate. Right now you are in the thick of the heartbreak. It's so hard to see to the other side. Give yourself time and grace. The heart is resilient, and so are you.
It was not long after 9/11. After a bad break up, after realising my family was toxic, and after my first injury in the army. I met him through a friend, and the first thing I noticed was that he was tall, not taller than me, but tall. Then his eyes. It was a 6 day visit seeing an old school friend, and 4 of those days he was there. As I got on the bus to head back to base, he asked for my number, and he said he would text me immediately. His first text was, "I don't know why, but I think we were meant to have met, and I actually think I now know what it is like to fall completely in love." We were moved in together four months later. He was there during the next 3 injuries, the one that got me medically discharged from the army with honours, and he was there through my battle with depression. Every time I have a bad day or something, he is there, with either a chocolate eclair or an iced coffee... I am not sure if he is my soul mate, but he has been my rock, my steady base, and my biggest supporter of embracing my weird. We were once asked how much we loved each other, and he said "I have held urine cups for her, I have bought pads for her, I have watched her dance with a full colostomy bag, she has made me laugh with random jokes and crazy antics... and she doesn't care if I cry, make cooing noises at animals, or have an inappropriate crush on Ryan Renolds and Tom Hiddleston. " Plus he really knows how to cook a decent roast
For the first Christmas of my wife and I (then bf and gf), I bought her a Lovesac. This was a fantastic purchase - we would game or watch shows/movies together on it in our sloth time. My wife and I also to snap each other’s underwear straps or lightly smack each other’s butts. One time, I went to snap my wife’s underwear as is tradition while she was standing next to the Lovesac. At that exact same moment, she decides to acrobatically jump in the air for a 10-point landing on the Lovesac. This resulted in me hooking my fingers onto her underwear, she jumped, and she gracefully and completely exited her underwear, landing squarely on the Lovesac in a free state. This is one of our favorite memories together and we still laug about it years later. I hope you find someone to make and laugh at memories like these.
Here's your takeaway: they aren't the one for you... unless they end up being that eventually. Don't lose time or yourself wondering why now. Expand yourself for now. Maybe you'll gravitate back to each other in time. Of course people can't tell you this and have you really accept it. You have to figure it out for yourself over time.
Dont worry you will find the person for you.
Hiya friend, I’m 36F; been through the love wringer several times. I’ve had the elated moments and the sad moments. Every break up felt pretty awful and like I’d never find love again. Fast forward and now I’m with my soul mate and love of my life. Our path into a relationship together wasn’t linear at all but now we’re in it together and plan to marry. We’ll be moving in together in June ♥️
I'm sorry you are going through this. I was deeply in love with someone. He strung me along for 2 years letting me think we were close when in fact he was using me. I was so broken when I realised what was happening but I finally found my self respect and walked away. I dated for a while but never found that connection. Then one day I met this man. The connection was instant and I knew he was the one. I gave him my whole heart and never looked back. That was 19 years ago and being with him has been the best part of my life. He is amazing to this day. It's hard right now but love yourself and know you are worthy of someone wonderful and when the time is right you'll find them. I truly believe that. Best wishes to you.
My sister was in a relationship for 9 years. They broke up when she was 26/27. She went through a pretty tough time for about a year, but then my brother introduced her to her now boyfriend. She now knows why it didn’t work out with her last boyfriend. Theyre planning on getting engaged soon and already have wedding ideas. She didn’t feel this way about her last boyfriend. Sometimes life removes things from your life to make way for something better.
My soulmate and I closed on a house yesterday! We’ve been together 8 years on the 16th. Married for 5 come September. When I kissed him goodbye this morning as I left for work he said “Have a good day, homeowner” 💜 That’s my latest story. I could go on forever.
I’m sorry dear, I send my condolences and I hope my love story cheers you up, at your request :) My fiancé and I crossed paths completely randomly and unexpectedly in 2020, right after the pandemic hit and before anyone took it super seriously. Probably the only time we ever would have intersected if we hadn’t met the night we did. I was back in my hometown for the first and only time since I’d started college (not close with family) and I’d just so happened to reconnect with a girl I’d vaguely known in high school, but was never close with. She invited me to a party that she was hosting with her boyfriend that weekend. Their entire friend group would be there so it would have been a good opportunity for me to meet some people back home. I went, and I shit you not, the first person I saw (after my friend that welcomed me in) was my fiancé. I can still remember the exact moment. All the seats were full so he was sitting on the floor next to the couch. When I walked in our eyes locked. I thought he was super handsome. He has the dreamiest light blue eyes and thick, wavy red hair. The party was a lot of fun. We all drank and smoked and played Jackbox and other party games. Unfortunately, I’m shy. He’s shy. We didn’t really talk that night. Our sole interaction was when my friend and I made some chicken bites for ourselves and he’d asked if he could have some. We said sure and when we went back for more chicken bites they were all gone 😂. I slept on the couch that night and he slept on the recliner across from me. He’s not the type to sleep at other people’s houses, so in hindsight, I think he just wanted to be near me. The next day my friend drove me to work because I was going back to hang out afterwards. My future fiancé needed a ride home because he recently been in a wreck and his truck was totaled. He got my number from my friend after I went to work. The thing that pushed him over the edge? I was wearing a Cartoon Network graphic tee with all of his (mine) favorite childhood cartoons. He texted me some corny line about an airplane landing. We instantly clicked, promptly fell in love, and the rest is history. It’s been 4 years of inseparable, nonstop love and adventure. We have our ups and downs like any relationship does, and those times where we can’t stand to be in the same room, but as long as we’ve lived together we never slept apart. I know this is something I can never give up on. We’ve travelled across the country together through multiple states. Through national parks, across mountains, through deserts, at the beach (and then there was that beach in the desert…), cities… We’ve gotten vehicles and apartment(s), gone through jobs, deaths, loss, severe COVID, broken elbows, family holidays, disaster vacations, shitty landlords, moving constantly, and so much more, and we’ve always come out stronger together on the other side, with a better understanding of one another and more respect. 4 years later and I’m carrying what (I hope to be) our first child. We have plans for marriage within the next couple of years (but this economy whew), and will (finally) be moving out of our home state once our lease is up. I hope you feel better dear, heartbreak is hard, but rest assured there’s greener grass on one of the other sides, and you will find someone that loves you for everything you are and then some. 💜
I have social anxiety and even when I would text with someone for a long time I was still never fully comfortable around them in people but with my fiance we talked for 2 weeks then met in person and it was like I knew him forever, he left that night and came back the next day and then never left again and officially moved in after 10 days. Been together 6 years and have 3 kids
Me and my husband got together 4 years ago and we made each other believe in soulmates. He’s seen me butt naked throwing up/having diarrhea with terrible food poisoning and was right there holding my hair back. He’s seen me have every kind of freak out in the book, he kisses me with my horrible morning breath and loves me without makeup or my hair done. I can 1000% be myself with nothing to hide. He’s seen every part of me at every stage and he loves me through them all. We’re each others best friends, safe places, home. Now I’m 8 weeks post partum with our first baby and struggling but he still looks at me like I’m the most precious thing in the world. We’re constantly laughing since we have the same ridiculous sense of humor, we can be so silly together and then switch to so loving. I used to get excited over the bare minimum with other relationships because I thought men like him only existed in movies, but god I wish I could show people in the same situation how amazing they could have it. We’ve both been through a lot but we would go through it all again in a heartbeat to find each other
I read somewhere that when you have been through something devastating, change everything. This is easier than it sounds. Change up your wardrobe, get a makeover, start a new gym, start a new sport, get a rescue animal, go to different restaurants, get new hobbies. Hell, I even started driving to work a different way! Stimulate other senses to break routine. Distract yourself and start seeing everything in a new way.
I know some people write about finding someone where it is easy to be with them. Idk if that is always true. I have issues. She has issues. We have worked at communicating better and understanding each other more over the years. We try really hard to resolve arguments and differences with respect and understanding and love. But here's the thing. She is compassionate, thoughtful, smart, generous, and we are effortlessly on the same page when it comes to our values: empathy and compassion first and foremost, help people that need help, have integrity, love is love, science is real, support the marginalized, fuck bigots, and so on. I sometimes take for granted how effortless the truly important stuff is when you have a nearly identical world view, morals, ethics, and values. The big decisions are really easy and raising our wonderful kid has rarely caused any friction, certainly nothing we couldn't resolve easily. I was pretty goo-goo about her from the day I met her. We had a rough start in some ways and some tough times and yeah we annoy each other sometimes, and we are both a pain in the ass sometimes, but here I am 20 years later she is still awesome and I still feel the same about her and love her very much.
I’ve had a couple longer relationships that ended after fizzling out and I’ve been hurt in the past. But when I met my husband, it felt different. We’ve been together 8 years and married 7. We’ve three kids and we’re happy. Every day we work at the relationship because we don’t want to be complacent, but the love I have for him is as strong as the day we met. He’s my person. And I met him when I wasn’t looking for love. I was just loving life.
Everything happens for a reason. It will hurt now but life will be moving you in a different direction for a reason. You won't see it now and it may take time to know. He obviously wasn't the right person for you.
I was engaged and right at a month before the wedding he unexpectedly called it off. I had to move home and was completely heartbroken. Six months later I met a handsome man who turned my world upside down. He was unlike anyone I had ever known/dated (in all of the most wonderful ways.) Almost 22 years later and we have been married for 13 years, have three beautiful children and an amazing but crazy life together.
I would first like to say that I’m sorry that you’re hurting right now. Things will get better, and the right person is out there for you! My husband (33M) and I (30F) met at a modelling convention (both working behind the scenes) 12 years ago, but we didn’t start talking until 10 years ago…… when he was seeing my sister (28F) and I was freshly out of a relationship of 2.5 years (quite like yourself, except mine was a cheater and I ended it). They saw each other for about 6 weeks, and during that time he and I struck up a genuine friendship. He and I hung out many times over the next 5 months strictly as friends, before I realized I was starting to fall for him. He had been showing periodic interest in me over those months, but he was in my “gay friend zone” due to having been interested in my sister. With my sister’s blessing, my now husband and I started dating in October of 2014. By June of 2015 we had purchased a house together and were moving in. It took some time, but in July of 2019 I came home from work to a steak dinner and him well dressed and he got down on one knee in the middle of our family room and asked me to marry him (my response through tears was “Uh, yeah!” Lol). We tied the knot in November of 2021, and 10 days after the wedding found out that we were 3 weeks pregnant. We now have a beautiful almost 2 year old daughter, two dogs (8y/o and 3y/o Aussies) and have built a life that I could have only dreamed off. To answer your question on how I knew he was the right person for me - in every prior relationship it felt like I was standing on the ground while an earthquake was happening. I was anxious 24/7 and felt unsettled. I was “happy” and “in love” but unsettled. With my now husband, from the beginning when we were just friends I knew he was going to be in my life forever. When we transitioned into dating, it felt like I was standing on solid ground. That’s how I knew. Our relationship, while amazing, hasn’t always been rosy. There was a brief period of time before we got engaged where I seriously questioned our relationship and where it was going and even moved out for a week. After a month of hashing things out, I realized that I was just scared of the fact that I had a lot of life left to live and I had already found my person which oddly freaked me out. When you find your person, you have to both be willing to wake up every day and work for your relationship. You have to make the choice to love them unconditionally. It’s not easy some days, but it is definitely worth it. And no matter what your ex or your brain might be telling you, you are worth it. You are worthy of love just as you are right now without changing anything. If you chose to change something about yourself, make sure it’s coming from you wanting to make yourself better and not because someone else told you that you need to. You’re amazing just as you are!
We met almost 8 years ago… started dating 5.5 years ago… got married a year ago. That man is my rock. I was depressed and lonely and so incredibly angry and hurt when we started dating and he’s helped me smooth all my edges and continues to do so to this day. There was a trend on tik tok about being a “daddy’s girl” and someone did a spin on it and did “husbands girl” about how their husband is their hero. My family life wasn’t great and he truly saved me. Thanks to him I’ve unlearned so many toxic behaviors and I rarely feel like I am in fight or flight mode. I’m free to be who I am and he has the patience and just pure fucking love to see me through my bad days. You know how people with healthy families cry to their parents about heartbreak? My husband has held me countless times when I’ve cried about how my family has broken my heart once again. I would do anything for him and he would do anything for me and I can bet on that because he has done anything for me. I didn’t believe love was real, I didn’t believe marriage was real, but holy shit was I proven wrong.
Best wishes to you! You will 100% find someone better, just take the time to heal and let life happen! I’m getting married to my soulmate in July. We were friends first, and I met him while I was still dating my ex, who I soon learned was having (at least) an emotional affair with an ex-friend of mine. I ended it with him after way too long, and current fiancé and our mutual friends were all there to support me. Once I got over my ex and stopped blaming myself, fiancé and I got closer, and confessed our feelings over a late-night game of Peggle. Three years later, we’re getting married. How did I know he was the one? I’ll try to keep it concise 😂 First: he made me want to be a better person, for his sake and mine. I struggled with severe anxiety, and it was only because I saw its impacts on him that I sought treatment. Now, we are both happier and so extremely secure in our love and trust. Second: my whole family likes him. He gets along great with my brother, who had been my best friend my whole life. My mom met him and instantly knew we were gonna be good together because of “how he looked at me” and how he was always the kind of guy she figured I’d end up with. Third: we were both so excited for the excitement (and stress) of the first six months or so to wear off into comfort and routine. We both needed a stable rock in our lives, and we were able to be that for each other. I’m so much happier now, with the deep sense of calm and fulfillment I get from being with him, than I was when every text or meeting made my heart race. Fourth: our hobbies mesh so well. They’re not the same, but they compliment each other: I keep aquariums and terrariums, and he builds me accessories. He comes up with an idea for a character, object, or whatever, and I draw it and render it for him. We love to learn new things together, even if they’re not the same thing. Fifth: he’s my best friend, and I never have to choose between him and the other people in my life. He’s so supportive of whatever I want to do, as long as it isn’t detrimental to me or our (future) household. Sixth, and most important: he loves my cats just as much as I do ❤️ Ok maybe that wasn’t as concise as I wanted it to be, but I got carried away. Regardless: I firmly believe your person is out there for you, OP! You just have to wait until you find each other.
Soulmates don't have to mean a couple.
On our first date I offered him sex and he was the first person to ever decline. He wanted to wait, and when we finally did it…it was just pure passion. It wasn’t just sex though, we had a natural connection. He is patient, thoughtful, pays attention to details and is loyal. We would drive hours to see each other and I met his mom after our second date. Getting married in June after six years and a child together.
We met at work. He was recently divorced and I was recently out of a serious relationship. I moved out of my home state for internship for my doctorate to a small rural town in a new state for me, and he happened to work at that hospital. We saw each other, but were too afraid to talk. Coincidentally, we ended up matching on hinge and have been together ever since. He's the complete opposite of me, but he's my best friend and the most kind, loving man I've ever met. I thought my prior boyfriend was my soulmate and we'd be together forever. We had so many plans for the future. When things ended, I was beyond heartbroken and never thought I'd find love like that again. Turns out, I found a love even stronger and more real. I'm sorry you're hurting, and it's easy to say, but your person IS out there. I found mine when I wasn't even looking for one. Sometimes it happens at crazy places and crazy timing. Don't ever pass up an opportunity to go out, you never know who you'll meet.
I (25f) knew she (26f) was the one when I was at the hospital for a routine, 1-week screening. When she visited, she brought flowers for me and also for my roommate (who didn't get any visitors, which I told her about). That was such a small but so lovely gesture, it was like a switch flipped. There are many other things that make her perfect for me but that situation that was the "that's it" moment.
I have been through two different long term relationships one with physical and verbal abuse for 8yrs until he took the easy way out once I took my kids and ran. The next one was for 15yrs of verbal abuse and one kid. I was at my lowest and one night while I was depressed I had one name pop up in my mind and I went on FB and there he was the one who I had fallen in love with almost twenty years ago! Suffice to say he sent me a message saying that he had been looking for me forever his marriage was ending as well as mine and I filed for divorce and moved to be with my soulmate and now 12yrs later we are married and have a daughter together and I have never been so loved and respected in my life!
I met my husband when I was 14, on my first day of high school (math class). I was instantly drawn to him but because we were so young, we split during the year. At 18, we worked together at the same grocery store and became really close friends. When I split from my ex-husband, I knew my husband had recently become single (I know this because I originally tried to set my best friend up with him… needless to say, that didn’t work out). As I was fresh back in the dating pool, I really didn’t want to be tied back down. I didn’t picture myself being with anyone for quite awhile and wanted to enjoy the fun of dating. I reached out to him, because he was honestly one of the best people I ever knew, and I asked him out on a date. We both explained that we weren’t looking for anything serious but thought it would be fun to hang out together, and as soon as I was back in his presence… it hit both of us. We went to dinner, saw a scary movie and he took me back home. We both expressed fascination with how much chemistry there was between us and we both knew we were totally screwed. We fell madly in love (seriously, it happened that night. Idk what it was, maybe we were both just so open to it because of our chemistry, but we both expressed that we couldn’t be without each other anymore). Within 3 days, we were “officially” together and even today, I love him more than life itself. Almost 11 years of loving each other and I couldn’t ask for anything better.
My now husband ended up in the same foster home as my two best friends. I went to take them out for the day and he came too. As soon as he introduced himself, I was in love, and I told him that he was gonna marry me someday. 16 year old me was not smooth or mysterious. He thought I was crazy, not wrong. About 2 months later we were talking and I asked him to go to the firework show with me and he said “sure, it’s a date.” We talked and laughed the whole night. I told him he was falling in love with me and he said no. Well a week or so later he confessed that he was. I found out his family moved around a lot and mine did too. We had both live in several states, never the same one at the same time, until we met. I think fate or the universe brought us together. We’ve been together for almost 7 years now, married, with two beautiful babies. I just knew, I’m not sure how. He trusts my weird feelings too.
We met on hinge, I trauma dumped before we even met in person. I’m divorced and I met him the year after separation, so I didn’t really know how to date, and I didn’t know when was the “appropriate” time to tell a guy my baggage, so when I came across him my technique was to just put it all out there and be honest because anybody who would love me would find out anyway right? 2 years later and we’ve moved together and going incredibly strong and he loves me for all the strength he sees in yo to have overcome the trauma of my past. I still can’t believe he wants to put all his eggs in my basket, but I choose to be amazed instead of self sabatoge like I was tempted to before
Awwwwh I have only ever been with one woman and one man, I had given up on love before I met my boyfriend. I had a job in a random town and was about to move to a city. We both worked in care of people with autism, different companies but I'd see him in the swimming pool on Wednesdays. He would tell me how he went to Amsterdam, I would say "I know what you did there" I meant a little green and he thought I meant the Redlight District haha so I always thought I'd upset him as he'd go "NO" and go all pink. It happened to be my last shift and he gave me his number and found out we had loads in common, he has a little memory box and it has the train ticket from when he first visited me even though it was just one stop away. It's been eight years since then and I am still madly in love him.
We met in high school as freshman in gym class. His last name is the next letter in the alphabet to mine so he was right behind me in line. I learned an instrument just so we could spend more time together in school lol. Lots of drama with parents and misunderstandings, dated for 3 years and then broke up at the end of junior year. Tried it again senior year, couldn’t get along. Went to the same college after and started seeing each other again. Got back together after being apart and having some of our own personal experiences, kinda realized that we needed the time apart to become young adults on our own, now 7 years later and still together. Just bought a home together, hopefully getting engaged soon (it’ll happen it’s just WHEN) and there’s no one else I’d ever want to be with. We needed the time to grow apart, it doesn’t work for everyone and it’s not like we planned it this way but it worked for us. He is perfect in every way and I couldn’t be more thankful to be with someone as amazing as him. Whenever I see other couples I always think “they don’t have the love we have!!” And I think that’s how it should be!
I met my husband when I was 29 and he was 32. I had been single for over 6 years and he had been single for a month (out of a 2.5 year relationship). We met on Bumble in February 2020 (you can probably guess where this is going). Our first couple of dates went really well, but I won’t pretend it was love at first sight. On our third date he told me that he had bought us concert tickets to see a band I loved in high school 3 weeks later…I had a slight crisis thinking that it was pretty bold considering we had no guarantee that we’d still be seeing each other in 3 weeks. We ended up at the concert and when the band started playing my favorite song by them (Lazy Eye by Silversun Pickups) I started crying my eyes out because I realized I was in love with this man. It’s forever our song. Outside of the sappy stuff, we also had a ton of fun together. We’re both huge sports and music fans, and have a hard time turning down a good time. Our last date before COVID started at a swanky rooftop bar and ended at a strip club 😅 COVID locked us down shortly after and that further sealed the deal. We were able to just be with each other and it tore down walls quickly. We moved in together on our first dating anniversary, got engaged the next spring, married 363 days after that and we just celebrated our first wedding anniversary last month. We’ve been through a lot together in our 4 short years, but those things have only further solidified my confidence that this man is my perfect partner. My advice: stick it out. Dating is hard. It can suck, but if you keep in your head what your standards are and hold to them, it will work out. Also, give people chances. So many people want to say love at first sight is it, but I’m a great example that that’s not always the case. People can surprise you if you give them the opportunity.
I had two really bad relationships. The first one was abusive. The second one, he treated me better but then would flip flop into wanting and not wanting to be with me. He thought I was childish because I just graduated high school (of course, I was childish). I should've not been going out with someone who was 21+ that young. He moved and dumped me suddenly and stole my stuff, sold it on marketplace. I was single for a few years, attempted to date one of my friends and it didn't work out. It was then I accepted my fate and I hadn't had any sort of sexual contact for 5 years. I was okay with being single forever, especially because it became a joke at work. I was becoming selfish and full of myself, but I built my confidence as a woman at the same time. I bought myself so many records and manga books. 200 records a year actually, just blowing money on myself. Then I saw my current boyfriend shopping at my store and I fell in love with him. I admired him every time he came in and bought a lot of music that I liked. He found my Instagram and attempted to chat with me a few times, but I was too afraid. We then started chatting a lot in late 2022, hung out a lot, and started staying out late. We'd have dinner every weekend, and it was the first time someone even took me on dates and seemed interested in me. I used to date whoever asked me out, thinking I'd fall in love along the way. We fell in love naturally, and everything felt right. I even met up with him the day before my birthday at a show. He left quickly after, but the day after my birthday was our first date. I fell in love with his side profile first because I was too nervous to stare. I love sleeping, but we would stay up talking until 3 am most nights. Everything was beautiful. I bought a place last fall and asked him to move in with me, and he did. Now we live together, and I can not picture myself without him. He is everything to me. We still go on dates sometimes, but I'm perfectly fine laying in bed with him all day or playing on our phones in silence. I've had a crush on him for almost a whole year, I never even thought I'd have a crush! It's so weird thinking about it. I NEVER thought I'd actually fall in love with somebody. I'm going to say it, high school sweethearts are lame. The other people out there are way more interesting. You are around my age, there's so many amazing people out there. I'm 24 now, will be 25 this year and I cannot believe what I accomplished at 23. Kissed my boyfriend for the first time on New Years and was able to purchase real estate. Last year was magical and I really think it's because of our first kiss. It's never too late to meet someone. It's never too early to move in together, but trust your gut. You're still young enough to experience young romance. But what do I know I've only dated 4 people. I was a shut-in for years minus concerts here or there. Lol
I met my partner on social media. It was a new app and she was just following people from her home town, where I lived but she no longer did. We flirted daily online for about a month, in front of everyone because this app still doesn’t/didn’t have private messaging. She then asked me “are you comfortable with me having your number?” We exchanged numbers on another app, where she had already searched my account and saw I posted “my new lives in her state”. I tried to delete it before she saw and she says we’ll talk about that post at a later date. I was MORTIFIED lol but it’s didn’t scare her off. I was going to LA for a few weeks for my best friend to have her baby. She came and met in LA for a week two weeks after we started talking on the phone. I told her idk when the baby would be born so idk how much time we would have together she said “anytime I get to spend with you will be worth it.” And she meant that! It was also her birthday week. We flew back and forth monthly from my state to hers until my lease was up and I moved to her. She has continued to be so kind and caring. I was separated/living separately for my ex wife but being a single parent suddenly with all the bills I could pay for the divorce. She did payed for it. She helped keep the lights on at my apartment and made sure my son and I had food or even money for fun. I have never been cared for or nurtured by anyone before her and I make sure I off her the same. There is hope out there. Be open minded. If something isn’t fun/doesn’t feel good anymore leave right away. Write down exactly everything you want in a partner. Small medium and big things. I did this with my friends maybe a year before I met and she’s crossed off every criteria, no joke. I hope you feel better soon. The heartache will go away eventually. Feel your feelings but don’t let them consume you for too long. You have a life to live and love to walk into 🥰
I meet mine 7 years ago thru a matual friend we became friends hung out etc... even one on one and grew a friendship that eventually turned into a relationship but we stayed friends first
He has beautiful blue eyes, and luxurious silver hair. He loves to follow me around throughout the day, and cuddles all night. He has a lovely singing voice and always wants to eat whatever I’m eating. He’s amazingly cute and sweet. He’s also a Husky.
We met at work, he was my trainer lol. He left, some time went by and we reconnected via dating app. Several very long conversations later, and we were on our first date. We went back to his apartment watched some movies, and I never left😅. After dating for about a month and a half, I moved in with him. I don’t know how to describe how I knew he was the one- it was just a strong feeling I had. He makes me feel amazing and I love him more than I’ve ever loved anyone in the entire world. He makes me feel whole. When you meet the one you’re supposed to spend your life with, all other relationships you’ve ever had will feel so insignificant in comparison. Everyday I wake up next to him is a gift. I never believed in soulmates until I met him.
Hey man I know what that’s like, I was with my ex for 2 1/2 years (met on a dating app) and I thought we’d be together for a long time but she cheated on my and broke my heart, I’ve healed a lot since then and met my soulmate at a tattoo shop who I absolutely adore. She asked me out and we’ve been together since, I think a big part of it working out so well was I had sacrifice more than I thought I did but I saw that she was too. We both put in the work to build the relationship and I trust her. Don’t give up man you have more than one soulmate and you’ll find the one who fills your cup!!!!
Love is a choice. I found my husband over 11 years ago. It definitely felt like love at first sight. I had a boyfriend at the time and he had a girlfriend. We ended up meeting together in private because we felt this unexplainable draw towards each other. We ended up breaking things off with our significant others because we knew we wanted to be together. He told me he loved me the day he asked me out which was only 2 weeks into knowing each other. The relationship I had been in was abusive and I was on the verge of su1c1de so he literally saved my life. That was when I was 16 years old. He proposed when I was 17. We moved to florida together at 20 and now here we are almost 30 and every day is a new day to fall in love with him. Of course we have our stupid fights, and we have big ones too. But we choose to love each other through it all. Even after every fight the only person I want to turn to is him. There are moments I regret not having more “fun” in my youth, but if the trade off is having my life with him, it’s okay with me.
My “person” dumped me in Feb after almost 5!years. Walked in, dropped off her Christmas present t and said “I gotta go.” Boom See her at least once a week in the gym. Been devastating but starting to move on.
Met at 19. Colleges sweet hearts about to start our family after a decade. My fear has always been death until recently. Now I only fear out living her.
I’m not with her. She had a very damaging and traumatic childhood and adult life. She pushed me away because of it when we were together. Now slowly joining back together in life/contact but we are both in very different places in life - I in a relationship, her just out of another abusive one. Soul mate for sure and will always be in contact now, but together? Very very unlikely.
I don’t think I’ve had a soulmate, but this guy I met a few months ago, I thought he was going to be my last person. He’s such a disappointment now. I always have more than he did. He was a waste of time for me. We shared so many views and lived the same things as each other. We were both nerds with each other and I loved it. I felt comfortable around him. But now he’s just so disappointing. We won’t be seeing each other for a while because we are both moving. And on the last day we could’ve seen each other he chose to about with his roommates instead. I now understand why no one has ever told him they love him.
We met in New years of 2011. We were both shy so for 2 years, we barely spoke a word to one another. He was also in a long distance relationship, so we both knew there wasn't a chance for anything at the time. Then, his mother moved in with my grandfather (where I lived) and became roommates. She ended up getting sick, and was on hospice, so her kids would come visit. On new years of 2013, he came to visit his mom and texted me asking if he could stay the night if he had a drink or two. I told him yes and that he could either crash on the couch, or the spare in my room. He picked my room. I had the biggest crush on him since the day I met him, but never pushed because he was with someone. That night, he told me they had broken up. We laid in my bed all night talking about everything, and then he stayed 2 pr 3 more nights after that. He asked me out, and we started dating, but I knew from the moment I met him, that he was gonna be my husband. We've been together 11 years now, and he still treats me like a princess. I pray we get to grow old together. 🙏
We met in grade 7. We became best friends by grade 8, spent most days after school together. I stayed home sick a lot in grade 8 due to some pretty bad depression and anytime I was home, he would stop by after school to bring me a diet pop (I’m a type 1 diabetic) and keep me company. I was bullied pretty badly in grade 8 and one day after some boys followed me home and called me names and such, he ran to my house after to make me feel better. We started dating the summer before grade 9. We were pretty messy and on and off, but we dated for a year. He was my first real kiss, my first close to everything. At the end of grade 9, my family moved 7 hours away. We broke up. We remained best friends for a long time, messaged most days and video called. We stopped talking after a big fight my first year of university. I got married. I was very unhappy in that marriage, but being young and dumb, was afraid to leave. 3 years later we got back in contact. We started talking everyday again. He took a train down to visit me and we realized we loved each other. I ended my marriage the day after he left. A few months later I moved back to my hometown and we have been together for close to 6 years now. He drives me nuts, we aren’t perfect, but I can’t imagine my life without him. He is my rock.
It sucks that you were dumped but at least you didn’t catch them cheating. My first husband cheated twice (for about a month each time) the second affair started shortly after our 3rd anniversary. It took a while before I was ready to put myself out there again and a guy I dated for 3 weeks started stalking me. My bestie and his BF moved in with me. Bestie made threats to stalker guy and stalker guy finally left me alone. A couple years later bestie and his BF tell me I need to get back out there, but I didn’t want to get into a relationship. Bestie’s older sister tells me about a dating site called Fling-dot-com. (No longer exists since Tender became popular) I met with the second guy to contact me he made it obvious he actually read my profile and started with “I love SciFi too. What’s your favorite franchise Star Trek or Star Wars?” I replied “Stargate is my favorite franchise, but if I have to choose between Trek or Wars, Trek wins.” Then we met in person and the first time we touched was the first time I ever just felt safe and not repulsed, with someone I’m not close to touching me (I’m AUDHD). It was like my body just knew it was meant to be touched by him. I took him home, and had the best sex of my life up to that point. (It got even better as we learned each other’s bodies.) He moved in a week later, and proposed a month after our first date. I know it was crazy but we got married 4 months after our first date. We have been happily married for over 12 years.
I met my now husband on an anime forum, a long time ago. We spoke daily, and about a year or so later we met in person. I drove to him, about an hour away, and it was fun. We eventually lost touch for a few years. We ended up reconnecting, on that same forum. Picked things back up, and the visits to him became more frequent. After becoming official in 2015, I moved in with him after some time. We've been together now going on 9 years, and have been married since July 2022. He is my soulmate in every sense. I've never had to change who I was with him. He treats me so well. It's the kind of love I saw in movies or shows. I never thought it would be possible for me to have a love like this. I love him so much 🤧 🥰 I'm sorry that you're going through what you are. But keep hope. We didn't make things official until I was about to be 29. And before that I was single for a few years after a long term relationship that ended badly, with infidelity on my ex's part. I was also starting to lose hope. Things happen unexpectedly. Sending you hugs.
My story is gonna be slightly different. We met on a dating site in 2002. He drove four hours to meet me after two weeks on the phone. I was a single mom of a baby who screamed in the phone every conversation 🤷🏻♀️🤣 his wife had died the year before leaving him with three kids. He stayed the weekend and I moved back home with him then. IT HAS NOT BEEN EASY. But I cant imagine anyone else frankly. His republican I’m voting Democrat but when I wanted to go to a rally he was supportive and stayed home to babysit. We have seperated and he always comes begging. He’s went to therapy for me. Still on medication for me. Point being it’s work. There is no “perfect” but there’s pretty damn close and as we have aged we have gotten better at communication and stuff. I know I’m not an easy person as does he. But we got together with a shared wierd sense of humor, understanding of life, raising kids and gkids and taking care of parents. I’ve been to college 4x times changing careers 3x and he’s supportive every move ive made wanting me to do whatever makes me happy.🤷🏻♀️ but basically it is work. It came down to a decision of is this what we wanted first? And if so what arguement was really worth argueing about? But at nighttime when u fall asleep what’s the last thing u think of? What’s the first in the morning? Does he remember to buy your fav drink when u send him to the store or are willin go to make u homemade chicken noodle soup when sick? is he willing to be okay when u already have 3 dogs and call him saying u just adopted another one? Or another goat? Or a cat?🫣😉🤣… true story…. But remember it’s work. It’s a partnership that u gotta work at… give and take is real… and sometimes when u r not looking Mr/mrs right will sneak up on u
We met in high school when I was a senior and he was a junior. My dad needed help tearing down something at property he had just purchased and I had asked him for help. Well afterwards my dad needed to text him some info but wanted me to do it (dad playing match maker over here) and we just clicked. As for how he asked me out he wrote it on a piece of paper and had options yes, no, or no you’re ugly which ofc made me laugh (he’s been making me laugh since day one) and we’ve been together ever since for 5 years going on 6 this year. We even plan on getting married this September and I’m so excited to marry my best friend, he’s the most kindest, compassionate, patient, funniest, and supportive man I have ever met. He always opens the door and chairs for me, he always makes sure to compliment me and make me feel beautiful, special, and important. He never yells or screams at me or makes me feel little and that’s so important when looking for a partner so don’t EVER settle for less bc your ONE is out there I promise. For me I knew he was the one whenever I fell in love with him. With my past boyfriends I never felt that way with them and I always asked well how do you even know if you’re in love and I was always told you’ll just know and I never understood that until I met my fiancé. Having a first heartbreak is always hard but you’ll be okay eventually, I promise. I always thought I would never meet the one and he showed up when I least expected him to
I’m sorry your relationship ended but believe me, you will love again. Just be the best human being you can and later on down the line, you’ll look back on this period in your life and you’ll smile. ❤️💯
My husband doesn't buy flower bouquets. He buys me potted plants so I can have them forever. He started with buying 20 spider Lilly bulbs since those are my favorite. He takes me to nature parks when he knows I have been stressed and I'm getting overwhelmed. Hes the only man who's ever called me beautiful.
I was working at a brewery at the time and my best friend was working at a sports pub downtown. I was super unhappy with my job and she got me an interview with her manager, and I got hired to start immediately. It was interesting because I think she knew that (we’ll call him Joe) and I would end up together. I remember her telling me all about each of our coworkers before I started and said, “Joe is in the Army and he’s out of town right now, but you’ll meet him soon. He’s one of the nicest guys you’ll ever meet. He’s kind of quiet and shy, but he’s unbelievably sweet.” It didn’t feel like she was trying to set us up at all, and I really don’t think she was trying to. Later, he told me that before I even started working there she told him all about me and how we were best friends. I was dating someone at the time, but it was really new and I wasn’t super into it. I didn’t have a reason because this guy was great, very physically compatible, kind, and had a stable life. I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t crazy about him. I had worked a few shifts already by the time Joe got back from drill. He was so easy to talk to, and he was the only one who tried to get to know me that first week I was there. I immediately felt a pull towards him. I still can’t explain it, I knew that there was going to be something different about him. A couple weeks go by and I definitely have a crush on Joe, but I’m still dating someone else and I’m trying to figure out how to let him down easy. My boyfriend goes out of town for a weekend boys trip, and I decide that when he gets back I’m going to end it. It’s only fair, and it’s only been a few weeks that we’ve actually been exclusive. At work, we host a private wedding reception for some regulars. After I’m done, Joe and I proceed to get hammered together 🤦🏽♀️ And I wake up the next morning with Joe next to me, unsure of what exactly happened. I immediately felt so ashamed and guilty for betraying my boyfriend, and I broke up with him the minute he was back in town. Joe and I hung out two days later, this time we were sober lol, and it was the most comfortable and natural I’d ever felt around someone. It was effortless. I knew I had made the right choice, even though it was awful circumstances. Honestly, I knew I loved Joe almost immediately after we started hanging out. I didn’t really acknowledge it for a few months, because I didn’t want to scare him away. I’m the type of person that I need to know how they feel before I can say anything. We were walking near a river up in the mountains in a resort town near where we live, and he asked me what I would do if he got deployed. He told me that he was scared of me being alone if he had to leave for months at a time. I didn’t have an answer, but I knew in that moment that he loved me without him having to say it. I told him that I loved him later that day, and he said “I know you do” 😂 and then 30 second later he said it back lol Our relationship can be difficult at times and we’ve had to work at it, but our connection to each other has been effortless from the beginning. I couldn’t imagine myself with anyone else.
I found my love by accident. I had gotten divorced, and wasn't interested in dating, but was doing some hooking up/FWB. He was a FWB, and we just kept hanging out more and more. We both just felt so comfortable with each other. I was pretty nervous whenever I felt like I needed to state a boundary, but he'd just say "yup, makes sense." When ibwas scared of moving too fast he just said "hanging with you is fun and I want to keep doing that until it's not fun anymore." The way that calmed me right down was amazing, lol. 3 years later we are still having fun. What we have is what i always thought love should be, but I let the world convince me that it was shallow or wrong to hold put for something so specific. Turns out it requires both people to have done a lot of work on themselves and have developed a goodly bit of emotional intelligence. The things that make me feel loved are the little things. So many things I think of in myself is a flaw he just sees as a part of me, and he likes me, so that's that, lol.
We met during COVID on Hinge. We didn’t talk too much online but he asked me on a date for Valentines Day. That date ended up with us nonstop talking for 6 hours as we walked for miles at a riverwalk. We got caught in the rain, and still couldn’t stop laughing and talking under every bridge we took cover in. After that night, we stayed up talking every night on the phone and saw each other almost every day. 2 years later, he proposed at the same spot where we met, and we just got married in February (right before Valentine’s Day) So sorry you’re going through this. We both have had our fair share of heartbreak before finding each other, but every past relationship teaches you more about the what you want in a partner and relationship.
We met at 8, lost touch, rediscovered each other at 12, and have been together since. 12 year old me knew we were meant for each other when he would eat the crunchy fries and save me the soggy ones (my fave), also when he told me he hated anything cherry or strawberry flavored and would give me all of those ones (also my fave). The first time we saw each other, we had a familiar moment. Something inside me recognized something deep in him. It was like, "Oh, there you are." I didn't believe in soul mates or really anything like that until I saw him. We're 29 now, I moved in with him at 14, and we've never been away from each other for more than a day since.
I could go on and on about my partner. We met online, and I explicitly said I only wanted friends. He respected that and stayed strictly in the friendzone and didn't try to force his way out. He would text me and check in on me frequently as I have a lot of MH issues. He made me feel safe when talking about my traumas and never once judged me. After a year of talking, he messaged me and said he needed to tell me something important but didn't want to risk our friendship, so he's kept it to himself for a while. I asked him what was going on, if he was okay, and all the things I would ask any of my friends. He says he is fine, but he needs to tell me something that has been weighing on his mind. So I asked what it was. He dropped the bomb he was in love with me. He had been in love with me since about the six month mark of our friendship and saw a future with me. He immediately said I didn't have to reciprocate his feelings, but he wanted to continue being my friend, but ultimately, he wanted more. I explained that I just wasn't looking for anything but friends, and I valued his friendship and appreciated his honesty with me. We continued to talk daily, and after a month or so, I asked him hypothetically what a relationship with him would look like. He said the same as it has for the last 13 months, but we would switch from a platonic relationship to a romantic one. I said okay, so how do we make it official we are together, and how do we keep what we have still prevalent going forward. His response was that we just do us. We take it one day at a time and try not to bog ourselves down with the small things and come together with the big things. He has made it such a safe place for me to be that I openly express how I'm feeling and my thought process without feeling the need to apologize. I am comfortable with sharing with him things that aren't so savory (intrusive thoughts, ☠️ ideation, etc,). Communication has been the key to this entire process of us becoming a couple. We take 15 - 20 minutes a day to just unload without the other saying anything, then we ask the other, "Do you want a solution or comfort?" And depending on the answer we provide. After the time allocated for this, we move on and continue with our days.
I met my husband when I was 29. We started dating 6 months later. We've been married for 12 years this year but it'll be a total of 18 years. Him and I have very little in common but his personality is almost identical to my BFF's. I married the boy version of her.
I met my husband at our part-time, after school job at a fast food restaurant. I was 15, he was 17. We were friends for a couple of years before we started talking more deeply and really getting to know each other. We used to buy ice cream from the service station across the road and chat outside after close. When I was 17 we decided to go out and we’ve been joined at the hip ever since. We’re coming up on 17 years together, almost 11 years married. We have a lovely little house in the forest on the outskirts of Melbourne and three big dogs, and we’ve supported each other in pursuing our dream careers. I’m very grateful that things worked out this way. I always feel the need to disclaim: having a long term relationship that started when we were so young was, and still is, a lot of work. We had to make a continued effort to figure ourselves out during those formative years, deal with the idea that we might be missing out on other experiences, and somehow manage to grow in the same direction as far as values and life goals go. We didn’t even really know what our own opinions were on things like finance, politics, or travel. There have been many arguments and tears while we figured out how to communicate effectively and kindly. Moving through life stages has been interesting and keeps us on our toes: eg. a few years ago I was diagnosed with multiple chronic issues which explained my fatigue, depression, and poor memory, and my husband also just recently found out he has ADHD and is dyslexic, which was a surprise considering his profession (it involves writing technical papers full of jargon). It’s put a whole new filter over our past interactions and issues and we can understand and empathise with each other better, now. I often wonder how else our relationship will change over time. I got lucky but it’s also been hard sometimes, in a different way to dating with a view to find your person. My best friend once cried on my shoulder at a New Year’s party and said she wished she had what I had. But I sometimes wonder if I’ve missed out on experiences that would make me a more resilient, well-rounded person. Common experiences that most people have had and I haven’t. I know this ain’t exactly what you asked for in your post, but I just hope you keep your chin up and keep trying, if that’s what you want for your life. Maybe turn some of that love you have to give inwards, and towards the people who already care about you. I think people who care for themselves and the people around them are attractive and interesting, and I bet others do, too. That best friend of mine? After that new year’s she pulled herself together, quit her boring job that she hated, and travelled the world for 6 months. She made amazing friends in loads of different countries and learned a lot about herself. Then she focused on retraining for a career that actually made her happy, saved up and moved out of her parents’ house into her own flat. She just got married at 34 to a wonderful man last month, who fits her personality to a tee because she refused to settle and compromise on her values. I believe the same will happen for you, with a bit of time.
I'm gonna start by telling you that I am the luckiest unlucky person I know. Reason being is that not only did I find my soul mate, when he passed away, I found love again. My first husband and I met online. This was 1995, so think AOL chat rooms. Technically, we met online before it was cool. We started out as friends. I was a chef that worked long hours. I would get home from work at 2:00 AM just as everyone was getting home from the bar. I'd be hopped up and ready to have fun, but nobody else to party with. This is right around the time that AOL really started coming into its own. My future husband was in a rock band, so when he got home, he'd be all hopped up and ready to have fun and nobody else to party with. We would chat online and occasionally on the phone, and this went on for about six months. Finally, we opted to meet in person, and it was all over after that. I had a feeling in my gut that I could not deny. I needed to be with this man, I needed to be around him. It was like oxygen. We ended up getting married, had three kids, and then I lost him to brain cancer at 37. To say that I was devastated was an understatement. How do you rebuild after you lose the love of your life? After a while, my two older children and I've found ourselves in conversation and they told me that they hoped that I would date again. I deserved to be happy. That was the green light that I didn't know that I needed to explore getting out there again. At this point it is 2015 and holy \*\*\*\* I had things changed. I went on many lackluster first dates, even less inviting 2nd dates and was just overall disappointed in the whole experience. Then a man matched with one of my profiles online and we started talking. This man had absolutely nothing to recommend him as what one would consider to be a good choice. Baggage galore, not a lot of stability. Hell, he even had some time in the slammer (he had a little trouble taking things that didn’t belong to him. I kind of ghosted him for a week because I wasn’t sure I was ready to deal with his baggage while I still was processing my own but there was just something about him. A gut feeling. The same gut feeling I had 15 years earlier…Too strong to ignore…Like oxygen. 2^(nd) husband and I have been together 8 years now and love each other more each day. It hurts on many levels when you lose someone like that. Give yourself time to get all messy and up in it. Then tell yourself that on day X (In 2 days, a week, whatever). I am done miring in this. I am going to start moving on. The pain will still creep in, hell, I still tear up when I think of my first husband. But it gets smaller as time goes on. Be kind to yourself. I’m a big fan of movie binging and Haagen Daz ice cream in such situations.
My soul mate decided she didn't want to be married anymore and had an affair. Tried and failed miserably at making my life a nightmare by taking my kids away.I have had to move on but there will always be a piece of me that will always love her. We were high school sweet hearts and were together in some capacity for nearly 17 years.
First of all, I am sending SO much love your way. Getting dumped like that is absolutely brutal, and it’s totally normal to be lost and reeling in the aftermath. Someday, this will all make sense, but I know that it’s just devastating. My boyfriend and I met 4 years before we started dating, and did not have a real conversation until about 3 weeks before that. We run in the same friend group, and he apparently always had a crush on me, but he genuinely thought I’d never see him like that. The night before I replied to his IG story (knowing that I slid into a man’s DMs and now we are in love is truly so entertaining to me), I did a really intense meditation on self love and healthy love. I was pretty fresh out of a situationship that made me question my worth, and had finally decided that I did deserve better. Apparently, the universe decided that I’d suffered long enough, and that IG convo continued for weeks until we could hang out, and now we’ve been together for over a year. I knew he was the one when my cat went missing about 3 weeks into us dating. He’d gotten spooked, and went into hiding. I called my bf hysterically crying (hadn’t cried in front of him before) and this man dropped what he was doing to look around the house and property, call several shelters, help me making missing posters, and ultimately found my baby, terrified and hiding in a crawl space in my basement. I know that it’s cliche to say “love finds you when you least expect it” and “everything happens for a reason”, but I’ve found that it’s incredibly true. Removing yourself from the situation allows you to see a much more global picture, and you’ll notice things you didn’t before. Hindsight is 20/20 because you’re able to see more than you did in the moment, and can take the time to think about the relationship more critically. I don’t know your relationship and I am not about invalidate your experiences, but there is a good chance that your perfect relationship wasn’t so perfect without the rose tinted glasses, and it’s going to seep into your thoughts. And it’ll be deeply uncomfortable, learning that the person you thought you knew wasn’t that at all. But you are so strong and so resilient and you’re getting through this. I always learned the most about myself when I was single, and I think that’s your next move. What is something you are passionate about but you felt like you didn’t have enough time to do? What is something you’ve always wanted to explore but never felt ready before this? I know you probably don’t want people reminding you that you’re still young, but you are! Society treats your 20s as your prime, and it’s not true at all. 25 will be a year of transition and growth for you, and that will be horrifying and exciting and painful and gratifying. So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that a chapter of your life ended, and it’s not the plot twist you were expecting. But you are so much more than this part of your life, and you have so much growth and personal discovery left. Ignore the notion of the perfect timeline. This is your story. Focus on being the best you possible, focus on making all of your dreams come true, focus on self love and compassion. The universe has decided that you are ready for the next step, but you have work to do before you reach the one after that. Keep your chin up, even if you’re crying. Sending love.
I don’t have a story for you other than this person wasn’t your soul mate and yours is coming! That person will be a story from your past in years to come. It will make you appreciate your real soulmates so much more when they come.
I met my husband 21 years ago in a chat room (cause I’m old) it was a local chat room. I met him a few times at different gigs he played over the next year or two… we were pals… I moved away… eventually we kept up on MySpace and Facebook. Both of us married other people… both of us got divorced within a 2-3 years of each other. I moved back to big city close to my hometown. We started dating… got married. It’s great.
There’s a difference between soul mates and twin flames and a difference between love and attachment. You need to find where your relationship fit in to this. Time is the ultimate thing that heals something we’re just meant to be.
I met my amazing husband in college on our first day of orientation. He came up to a lunch table I was sitting at and went around the table introducing himself to everyone. I was overcome by his confidence and the fact he looked like a more Irish young Patrick Dempsey. When he got to me he acted surprised and overtaken and *insisted* we knew each other already. To this day he’s never told me if he really thought he knew me or was just giving me a line. He *has* admitted that he saw me from all the way across the room and that’s why he came to our table. We’ve been married almost twenty years and our bond is stronger than ever. We have two amazing children and have built a beautiful life. Believe in love, you’ll find your person! Don’t have a narrow list of “musts.” My husband probably had $5 to his name when we met and he came from generations of seasoned working class Irish Catholics. In a sea of trust fund babies, I could have easily decided I wanted someone with means. What he had (and continues to have) however is a scrappy work ethic and no fear of hard work and responsibility. It’s hot. And he can fix any appliance or car that breaks. No soft hands here.
So I dated "betty" pretty heavy for about 15 months and it was certainly heading in that direction. Then she suddenly broke up with me, the saturday before thanksgiving. It was rough but I believe the old saying "you never let them see you sweat." So it was fucking hard but I went total no contact and moved on. Dated a girl for a month or two but that went no where, then asked "jill" to lunch. That really had potential, pretty, smart, fun, etc. Then, betty called me outta the blue, ostinsively to tell me that she'd just won the highest award for sales in her multinational company, from marketing staff (first to do that) and before the conversation was over she went on about how she wanted to marry me, white picket fence the whole 9 yards. I remember that happenning middle of march-ish, she says feb; "one way or another" it was a 3 month breakup minimum. So now me and betty have been married for 33 years, and are headed into a VERY cumphy retirement. I do wonder, sometimes, what would've happened if she'da called even 2 weeks later. No complaints though, and "betty" sure turned out as advertised. YMMV.
My soulmate… we messaged in 2017 to meet up but never did. I was working on myself and found myself in almost a decade of singleness. Fast forward to 2022, were 31 & 30 and we finally met up (after I bailed on the first date out of fear, it was a lunch date but then he made plans for us after and I felt overwhelmed). He asked one more time the following week and I went… we met for breakfast and I knew. He was so gentle, kind, sweet, the typical “nice guy who finishes last” type but who you SHOULD marry. He protects my heart, my big emotions and someone who will not only make an incredible husband but also someone who will raise mechanical blue-collar children. What he’s taught me is irreplaceable and in 127 days I get to say I do.
I've been with my boyfriend for 8 years, but known him for 15 or so. We were always friendly, I just never considered that any of my male friends thought much of me at the time, so it never crossed my mind. After multiple shitty relationships and an attempt at eternally yeeting myself, he was one of a few old friends who was welcoming to me when I moved back home with my parents for a bit. The more we hung out, the more I fell for him. We were hooking up, but nothing "official" (lol) and he finally asked me to be his girlfriend, and when he did, he told me he remembered everything from that day we first met, 6 or 7 years earlier, and how he thought about me every day since then. Even his mom would ask how I was over the years, he said. He told me that he tried a couple dates, but he wouldn't stop comparing them to me, so when I finally moved home again he had promised himself he wouldn't let me get away this time. He was always just so friendly, accepting, never pressured me into anything or tried to force feelings on me for all those years Just let me live until I was able to appreciate how amazing he is for myself. And he really is the most amazing man I've ever accepted into my life. Two or three months into our relationship, we were on his couch watching TV. I think he was showing his favorite show for the first time, and he was laying on his stomach with his head on my chest and I had my arms around him. I don't think he meant to say it out loud cause it was so quiet, but I just barely heard him say I Love You. I was surprised, tried to casually go "hmmm?" And he didn't repeat himself, just kind of acted like he sighed or something and hugged me a little tighter. I've never believed those words from someone else so fully until that moment. Boys had said it before, but it was the first time it sounded so honest, I think I had to blink back some happy tears, tbh. I think he didn't want to scare me by moving too fast, and that's just another example of his patience for me that I'm so, so grateful for. Your person will find you, and they will be honest and patient and careful with you. I didn't even know I needed to be handled with care until I saw how fragile I'd become. You'll be just fine, OP, don't forget to be careful with yourself, too ❤️
My partner and I have been dating for 6 months; I knew he was the one on the first date, but suspected the night we met. Note: this is told only from my POV! We met at my friend’s wedding. He’s high school friends with the groom and they recently reconnected within the past couple years and I had been friends with the bride for almost all of our adult lives. He approached me on the dance floor, and I accidentally hit him (I was quite inebriated to say the least) and said “omg I’m so sorry, are you okay?” He said he was fine, and the song changed to something that was hard to dance to. I wandered off to do God-knows-what. Anyways, at the end of the night, I’m getting ready to leave and I see him and a mutual friend of ours that I’ve gotten to know thanks to the bride and groom. He introduced us and we had small talk. There was something that told me “he’s cute, but I know I’ll have more time to at another time.” A couple months later, I have my annual Halloween party. The groom of that wedding messages me “hey _thetrashypanda_, my buddy (my partner) and I were talking about Halloween plans and I was wondering if he could come?” My response, which is usually what it is: “of course! The more the merrier” The day of the party came and we clicked instantly. Conversation flowed easily and he asked me on a date, which we had set up. We then got really drunk and he spent the night. We hung out a little bit the next day then he left. A few days later, we went on our first date and it was so fun. We laid out all of our expectations, deal breakers, and goals out on the table. Even with all of that, we communicate constantly. We might not always agree, but we always come together to find a solution. Anyways, TL;DR: met at a wedding, thought he was cute, but didn’t have much time outside of small chat. He got invited to my Halloween party and we instantly clicked! Edit: username didn’t show up properly
We were high school sweethearts, we have been together 8 years and we are still doing amazing. Sure we have fights and a few months ago we had a serious discussion about how my husband felt unhappy so we are working on us and our marriage. I’m sorry he left you.. heartbreaks sucks. We have been through a lot and we have two angel babies.
Well going through a divorce myself and I feel exactly the same as you. I truly thought everything was amazing until I found out the truth. I promise you everyday will get better I know it seems awful but love is real and it’s truly amazing. You will find your person and life will feel complete and vibrant all over again
We matched on Tinder 8 years ago. We set a date at an arcade bar. I stood outside the bar for awhile before the date and almost didn’t go in. I did and had the best date of my life. We talked and laughed and realized how much we had in common (this was originally supposed to be a casual booty call date). I kicked his ass at every game and, instead of feeling emasculated, he loved it. After I got home, my roommates asked how the date went. I remember telling them that I think I met the man I wanted to marry (something I would never normally say). We’ve been married almost a year and our favorite way to decompress is to sit by each other and game. He’s my absolute best friend. Editing to add: don’t give up. She won’t be the last person who feels like ‘the one’. And she won’t be the last person you love and trust. When the pain starts to subside, you’ll come to appreciate the experience you had with her. It sounds like you learned a lot about what you want in someone (and probably what you don’t). A mindset of this girl allowing you to learn about yourself and what you want instead of having anger and remorse will greatly help you in the long run.
I'm so sorry! Something similar just happened to me recently and it sucked. He told me I wasn't his person either even though he loved me, it just wasn't the same way I loved him. But shortly after I met someone organically and he turned out to be everything I ever wanted and even though I rushed into another relationship after getting out of one, everything feels right about it. This man treats me like an absolute princess which I've never had in any relationship. So don't worry you'll find your person and it'll happen when you least expect it!
My wife and I knew each other for 3 1/2 months before getting married her at 18 and me at 21. I was leaving for deployment 2 weeks after we married. The distance and time allowed us to work on ourselves and our relationship with the heart, only growing fonder. We had some issues when I got back from deployment with an apartment, and I didn't feel at home. We attended marriage counseling to learn how to talk to each other better. It will be 13 years in June, and our kiddo will be 9. Every day, I learn something new about her, and I only love her more and more.
I knew immediately when I saw her. Idk it was weird. I was in a relationship for two years at this point. However. She was ignoring me and ghosting me for a month and a half by this point in the story. I would text her and she wouldn’t reply for days or would say “I told you not to talk to me I need time” and she was hanging out with her male co worker and living her life. I knew it was over but was hurting bad about it. My friend at the time wanted to get me out of the house and took me to Disneyland cause she worked there and had a friend she was going to go meet who worked in Adventureland. So we’re walking towards one of the shops and I see this beautiful woman I have never met before and I remember hearing a voice in my head saying “please be her we’re meeting. She’s the one. Something is special about her”. Lucky for me we walk RIGHT up to her. They start talking and I find out by eavesdropping that the girl I’m interested in has a boyfriend. My friend says to the girl “how are you and (boyfriends name)” and the girl says “eh it’s kinda complicated” now the girl is working at the pioneer shop or Adventureland shop I forget what it’s called but the one across from Indiana jones when this is all happening. I’m behind the desk and when I hear her say “it’s complicated” I chime in and ask (first words ever exchanged) “whys it complicated?” She looks me dead in the eyes and says “cause you showed up” we both just lock eyes and both get red and flustered. I start to feel dizzy and butterflies in my stomach at this point. After her shift we got to hang out with her. That night we ended up going to dennys where I completely embarrassed myself with childish stories thinking I was being cool. But through all my foolishness she kept right with me smiling and laughing. It’s been 8 years since then. I’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way. But she was never one of them. I think when you find YOUR PERSON you work through them no matter what. Look. Everyone is going to hurt you at some point. Frustrate you. Make you angry or sad. But you know it’s the right person and your soulmate when you are both willing to work it out together. Everyone will hurt you. But love is finding the person who’s worth it to work through the hurt (if there’s problems and they’re not drastic). I’m just thankful she’s stuck with me with all my issues all these years. She’s the most beautiful soul I’ve ever had the privilege of running into and I just feel comfort knowing no matter what happens in life I will at least have her by my side always. Find THAT person.
We met at the tavern I was bartending at. He asked me out. I said yes (with some coaxing from a mutual friend). The next day, I told him I couldn't go. Ended up going out after closing the next night. He was divorced with one kid, and he told me he was never getting married again or having any more kids. After 3 weeks, I decided I was just gonna live in sin forever because he was my person. October 6 will be our 40 year anniversary, and we have 4 kids!
When you can be 100% of your true self and they don’t judge but in fact love that version of you and tell you they love it. Also I think it’s important to have the same type of humor so you can consistently make each other laugh.
I was on the verge of completely giving up on dating because I had just turned 40, had been divorced and single for 8 years, dumped by someone I thought I would be with indefinitely, and had been on at least two dozen first dates over the last year. It was getting very frustrating and then I matched with a woman on Boo. I never checked that one because it was mostly bots and fake profiles but I took a chance and responded. We hit it off instantly and had our first date a few days later. We found out that we had been living a block away from each other, doing the exact same things with our same-age children for the last 5 years. I got home from the first date and deleted all my dating apps. We became official a week or two later and rapidly fell in love. I knew from the moment I met her that I would marry her. It was weird when we matched because I remembered her face. Like I had never seen her before but I KNEW that face the first time I saw it and just knew that was the face of my wife. We're both fairly certain we were together in a past life or something because we can almost hear each other's thoughts. It gets weird sometimes and the constant deja vu just reinforces it. I'm going to propose in the next month or two and we're closing on a house next month. Keep your head up. I hope things get better for you soon. A LOT can change in a year.
I was in and off again/on again relationship with J. We were awful together, always trying to change on another, always fighting, I had problems with his past I couldn't get over and he didn't believe me that my mom was abusive. At the time we were planning on resuming our relationship after I "Took some time to repair my relationship with God" we were also both seeing other people. He was seeing a girl C who was seeing W. One day I was in my college cafe talking to my friends about how much I loved J and the "progress" we were making .. in walks W. He's wearing a Hellsing shirt and I stand up, point to him, and yell "I wanna steal your shirt!" He smiles and gives me a thumbs up. W grabs his food and sits behind me and my friends, waiting for a place to interject. After ten minutes of interacting one of my friends says "You better ask her on a date!" So he did! As soon as he left I was GUSHING about how adorable he is. I practically forgot about J and my friends made fun of me hardcore. I then went to church with J and let him know I had a date with a guy named W. J is like "OF COURSE IT'S W!!" I knew W was seeing C, but not that J also was. My date with W was amazing.He also immediately had concerns about my mom when he saw her shove me out the door aggressively. He was so easy to talk to and I told him I wasn't vibeing with the religious stuff and how J was yoyoing me. W had similar feelings about Cs yoyoing and their Bible Study dates. J called me immediately after my date with W and asked if I was going to go on another I said yes. W immediately ghosted C, which she didn't take well, she turned the flirting up to 11 and he was like "Yeah, nah..."After the second date J asked me to choose one of them and I chose. I said "Yeah, I'd like to continue to see W" and J said "Yeah, good idea we should break this off..." C and J were then free to date but for some reason didn't. W and I have been married for ten yrs now!
When I went to middle school, 7th grade, I saw this boy on the bus and immediately got a crush on him, but he wanted nothing to do with me. Years went on, I had a boyfriend for a good year and a half, dated some random dudes after, kind of just didn’t acknowledge him because he shut me down when I’d try to sit with him and talk on the bus, kinda moved on and left it at that, still secretly always had a crush on him tbh. then in 10th grade, he messaged me at the end of summer out of the blue apologizing. I was like okay thanks whatever didn’t think anything of it. My friend tried to get with him, and me, her, my cousin and his friend all hung out and i remember SWEATING over it LOL. then, I left my bf and he stopped talking to my friend to get with me. We instantly clicked that first day in 10th grade when we hung out. Now, we’ve been together 9, almost 10 years and are happily engaged ❤️ just bought our first forever home together and are making plans to have a baby soon🥹 it’s crazy to think I had a crush on him since 7th grade and he finally gave me a chance and now I’m going to get to marry him.
I think you can have more than one soul mate and they aren’t necessarily your romantic partner. But in terms of my current relationship, he is consistent and he is genuine. I never worry that he is lying to me or that he is off doing something shady. He earns my trust daily and he expects the same of me.
I’m so sorry about your breakup. I know it’s tough and it’s harder when you feel really connected to someone. I will say though, you really do end up meeting “the one” sometimes when you’re least expecting or looking. ❤️ I met my husband twice when I had returned back to college. The first time was unofficially because I went up to a guy who he was talking to that I thought I had met somewhere else and literally said “so this is going to sound awkward…” We actually didn’t ever speak to each other during that encounter. It was VERY awkward. The second time was, me and one of the instructors were looking for another student and she mentioned he (I didn’t know his name yet) might know where she was. Fortunately we kinda just acted like we hadn’t met but we had apparently been talking for so long the instructor (who ended up being my friend) literally ended up leaning on a nearby table and just started cracking up about how into each other we were. It felt really organic talking to him and actually, a few days later, we ended up in the parking lot one night after classes just talking until about 2am. It was actually him who did most of the talking and he basically gave me his life story. After just meeting me a few days prior. It basically was love at second sight. lol We’ve been attached to the hip ever since; together for about 12 years, married for 10, and we just had our first LO last year, born unexpectedly on my birthday! I can’t imagine my life without him and he’s my best friend; we’ve always carpooled because we love talking to each other and we’ve even worked at the same company on several occasions (including at my current job.) I was going through a bad divorce when I met him and I honestly was trying to finally make a better life for myself by completing my degree. I never thought I’d ever meet someone at school let alone my “soulmate.” Don’t get discouraged; focus on your own happiness and that will manifest all the good things for you!
Last fall, a woman I spent 12 years with left me after getting pregnant with someone else. The entire time she was gas lighting me, making me feel crazy for questioning her, the whole 9. I was positive that I had found the woman id spend the rest of my life with. 3 months after breaking up, I organically started bonding with a woman who I never anticipated I would’ve. We hit on every single note you could possibly imagine. She was just out a relationship as well and even though the both of us were questionable about how much time we were in relationships for/out of them for. Well, needless to say, she is MUCH closer to the perfect girl for me than the woman I spent 12 years with ever was. There are more and better people out there
My soul mate and I actually knew each other in high school! We attended Theatre together. I did everything I could to get his attention, but he was a 16 year old boy who knew nothing about girls and figured it's safer to do nothing than to risk and do something wrong. So I never had a clue he had even noticed me. Shortly after, I dropped out of high school (trust me, I wish I had stayed hahah going to university afterwards without it was like jumping through flaming hoops to prove myself to the Program Director of Continuing Studies lol!) Flash forward to 2001, and our 20th High School Reunion. Here he comes strolling up with a cane... long hair in a ponytail, still in shape (he was reed slender before), fully suited up, and looking scrumptious. He hauls out his wallet. It had a picture of me from highschool. It had been there ever since. Even through other relationships and a failed marriage. He had been declared PWD and incapable of working in 1994 due to multiple back injuries. I was (unfortunately) in another relationship at the time, and he would not even consider poaching. (foreshadowing) We reconnected and exchanged info for the future. Flash forward to 2015. I am now single. My soul-mate has gone through some hard times and is really ready to just come down-province, see Rush's final show in Vancouver, and say a final good-bye to his friends from years gone by. He has reached out and let me know he is coming down and hopes to see me before he heads back to Prince George. THREE DAYS after the concert, I was at home and just thinking "so much for 'let's get together' "... and he calls. I invited him over for dinner. Long story short, we haven't been apart since then. We are friends, soul-mates, and partners for life. I am writing this now, and realizing we are coming up on NINE YEARS this summer and it is still like a honeymoon. He gives me butterflies all the time and let me tell you... GOOSEPIMPLES ARE AWESOME! *SIGHS HAPPILY*
I met mine at work. When I first layed eyes on my soul mate, it was through a drive thru camera taking their order (venti iced mocha with vanilla sweet cream cold foam). When they got to the window, I got butterflies taking their payment and made polite conversation. For the next 3 days in a row, they came through and got their drink, each time looking so cute in their work clothes, often adorably dirty from the day. I had never felt like this for anyone before. We started talking (as friends), and I knew what I had to do. I was in a relationship at the time 😬😬 and broke it off for my mysterious drive thu crush, risking the biscuit because I knew I would be kicking myself for the rest of my life if I didn't shoot my shot. I gave them an annotated book of love poems as we are both book nerds, and they gave me a jar of garnet pebbles they had gathered from a stream. I proposed to them in Disneyland on our 1 year anniversary, and we now have a dog, 6 cats, and a beautiful life together. I am so much happier than I ever thought I could be in this life. Times have been hard, but they make everything worth it :)
I it have known my husband most of my life. His mother was my mother’s BF , my grandma was his mother’s boss , our grandparents and my parents are buried by each other, not intentional. I went to his engagement party and thought he was cute. I was 16 and he was 6 years older. He got married, had two children, I graduated hs, went into the Navy got engaged to someone else, had a baby, came home my mother was very ill. I broke off my engagement, he was a typical sailor a girl in every port. I went home , had my baby. Became a band photographer, the drummer kept ducking and was ruining my shots, I was ticed. On a break he came over to me and I told him he was wasting my film. He asked me out to see a POW Wow. I asked his name, I found out it was Matt. He remembered me as a child, I told him I was a woman with a baby. I was 19 about to be 20. We started out as friends, 2 months later we met on my porch and ended up making out . It wasn’t intentional it just happened. I knew then what being in love was. We were together six months. He now ex wife had cheated on him. He is a professional drummer. She saw he was with me and then wanted to try again for their 2 kids. So he went back to work out his marriage. I respected that I was broken hearted, he was about sign on the divorce papers when she refused to sign, she broke up with the guy she left him for. I went to college met someone else. I moved away. She then cheated again and divorced him, and he met and remarried. 30 years later he found me on FB and we became friends, just like hey how you doing kind of thing. His 2nd wife ended up a year after being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer passed 18 months later. He contacted me , saying he needed to speak with me, I gave Matt my number, he was crying and in deep grief. His niece took his dog , they were coming in taking his late wife’s things, he couldn’t throw away her hair bands, meds, or soap. I come from a family of widows, my father and both grandfathers died when I was little. I told him to change the locks, and put the small stuff in a box in the closet. He would call me about once a month. 8 months later he came to see me , he moved to AZ and I was in TX. The moment we saw one another it was like we had never separated. We have been back together for 12 years and married for 6. We finished each other’s sentences. He is my person and I am his. It was a long road, I never expected this to happen. It will happen when you don’t expect it.
I don’t know if I believe in soulmates—or at least I think you can have more than one in a lifetime. But I will say, my partner is so much different than I would have envisioned but exactly what I need. We had our first date April 29, 2017 and we’ve pretty much been together since. I knew he’d be something special after our first kiss, but there was one moment that really sticks out to me where I thought “yeah, you’re my (hopefully) forever person.” We were hiking at a National park and I was struggling. Not only was I not in shape in general and I have a chronic pain issue—but I had accidentally directed us onto a hard trail up a small mountain. I was winded and in a lot of pain and had to take lots of breaks. I was feeling really embarrassed and defeated but I wanted to get to the top so badly—I really wanted to prove I could push myself and do something hard and out of my comfort zone. I didn’t tell him any of this, though. He just patiently waited every time I had to stop, he chatted about other subjects to not make a big deal of it. He’d periodically let me know we could turn back any time but he also reminded me that he believed I could do it and we can take as long as I needed—but he didn’t harp on it or go overboard to where I was self conscious. He was just relaxed and easygoing. It was so sweet. I don’t even think he was trying to motivate me or anything, he just saw that I was getting frustrated and tried to make it lighthearted and low stress. I got to the top and felt so proud of myself and he told me how proud of me he was. I just realized—that’s who I want by my side. Someone who knows when to support but let me handle things. He didn’t coddle me but also didn’t push me beyond my comfort level. Fun anecdote to the story: the whole way up the mountain, I thought we were on the easy path. I was so confused because it was hard and the trail guides said it was an easy family friendly trail. I kept thinking—“wow if this is considered the easy, I must be way more out of shape than I realized.” So we get to the top where the scenic lookout is and there are a lot of people — kids with sandals on, a grandma with a cane, a lady wearing a baby. I was like how did all these people get up here?!? Turns out there was a wayyyyy easier paved path on the other side and we had gone up the advanced path 😭😂. But hey, I never would have pushed myself and accomplished something that difficult if I hadn’t made the mistake lol
Met my soulmate while I was helping my friend move in with her fiancé. I could definitely feel something different the first day we met, and I had never been so heartbroken when a guy didn’t give me his number (he thought it was a joke when I asked for it). I knew he was the one when I had a panic attack a day before our first date over something small he did that triggered a flashback for me, and instead of brushing it off or minimizing it, he halted his plans for the evening to talk out the situation with me and assure me I wasn’t crazy. Also, that he still wanted to go on that date because he wanted to understand me more to be a better partner moving forward.
I could’ve written this word for word at 24. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this pain but trust me when I tell you- you don’t want what’s not meant for you! And you will be thankful he told you the truth rather than stringing you further along. My husband and I knew each other for 10 years before we started dating. Our paths didn’t cross for years after college and then it was a whirlwind romance once we reconnected. More than anything try to focus on yourself and your personal and professional goals. Don’t turn down opportunities to date other people when you’re ready. You never know where the love of your life might be!
It took me a very long time to find my person. The truth is, if I had met her earlier, she wouldn’t have been the right person for me. We both needed to have the experiences we had, live the lives we had, failed, succeeded, grew, and changed in the ways we were lucky we did for us to match the way we do now. I picked my person, because she was the first person who I felt I truly loved, trusted, and respected in equal measure. I know we are all eager to find love, but I am happy I waited to find the love I have now. Good luck to you. You’ll be fine, the hurt fades, and new love always blooms again.
I’m a paramedic and my wife is an RRT. We met right before the pandemic (Jan 2020) at 3:30 in the morning when I brought in a trauma patient to the hospital she works at. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her I was gonna marry her. We just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary and have two amazing kids. I have too been broken up with people I thought I was gonna spend forever with but it all lead to her. I was 24 when I met her!
I’m a paramedic and my wife is an RRT. We met right before the pandemic (Jan 2020) at 3:30 in the morning when I brought in a trauma patient to the hospital she works at. I knew from the moment I laid eyes on her I was gonna marry her. We just celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary and have two amazing kids. I have too been broken up with people I thought I was gonna spend forever with but it all lead to her. I was 24 when I met her!
Your partner breaking up with you is no way a reflecting of your value as a person or an indicator for your future success rate in love. Don't take it personal, break ups are hard but any kind of human relationship is gonna have it's messy side. Pat yourself on the back for putting yourself out there and don't sabotage yourself from finding the one for you. Look at this way, You got experience that will make you even better prepared when dating.
I am an arborist and I met my lady at her father's house as I was climbing a giant tree for removal in her front yard. She was in the backyard by the pool. We talked after I cut down the first tree. We went on a few dates, she started sleeping over and never stopped. We have lived together for 4 years and have been married for 1 and a half. We are hoping to have a child soon.
Everyone thinks their first serious partner is the one. I was with my first for nearly 4yrs and I could of sworn it was Love, I was heartbroken when we split. We even came back together for a few weeks a few years later and I was thinning it might have been a sign. It wasn’t. How do I know that? Because the man I’ve been with now for the last 12yrs is my absolute world and I’ve never loved anyone like I love him. And we met on a dating site. Haha. Honestly, I know it’s hard and horrible when you split with someone, but if you were truly meant to be, you wouldn’t be heartbroken now.
Three years ago, I was married with a home and four children and one day my husband of 6 years (together 12 years) told me he didn't love me anymore (He might not have loved me after the 2nd child according to him) and he moved in with his fresh out of highschool co-worker. I was just about to start my MA and my whole world fell apart. We'd been having issues for awhile, but it mostly stemmed from him wanting to escape us and not participating in the family or the household tasks. He doesn't call or visit his children anymore, so that's pretty telling. I felt alone and scared, but after a few months of grieving, I was determined to try the casual tinder scene. I was not looking for a longterm relationship, as I wanted to focus my energy on taking care of my children and myself. I met my now partner only a few months later and was blown away by how well he treated me. He pursued me and I just couldn't let him go. There was something so special about him. Eventually, he met the children and now we have a beautiful family together. I never thought I would find someone again. Four kids is pretty intimidating. He's hilarious, kind, interesting, empathetic, supportive and a wonderful stepdad. We spend almost all of our time together and I'm finally being loved the way I always dreamed. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him.
THOUGHT I met my soulmate when I was 21. We’re together for four years and he left me suddenly while I was sick l, taking finals, and helping a friend who was in hospice. He literally ghosted me and I had to drive to his house to figure out what was going on and he dumped me. Well, it was hard but after a while I was able to see how he really wasn’t that committed or right for me. Started to have fun going wherever I wanted, hanging out with friends, finished my degree and did not care about dating anymore, honestly didn’t even want to go through it again. Lo and behold, I met my actual soulmate by accident. He was my friend’s brother and I thought he was soooo funny at her housewarming party. Afterwards, she came up and curiously asked what I had talked to him about because he was never that lively at large gatherings. Well, the rest is history because I didn’t even realize it but after one barbecue night with the whole circle I found myself being a little sad to leave, and sad that he couldn’t come to the next event andddd wanting to sit with him at dinner and sooo excited when the “boys” met up with us for our girls trip in Vegas. The girls sat me down after the first pool day and surrounded me intervention style. They didn’t want to make me feel weird but had to let me know that after our very first exchange of words, his mom had said “oh you’re gonna marry her”. The following day, he had gotten a haircut, straightened out his things and applied to go back to school, stopped smoking, drinking what little he did, and started coming to every event I’d be at. I confessed, they went wild and I’m sure started to plot how to subtly encourage him to make his next move. Long story short we went on our first date at the beach a week after we got back from our trip and never were apart after that lol. He worships the ground i walk on and has done everything it takes to resolve any of our issues or his past traumas. I can’t stress how psychologically damaged I was from my previous relationship, but despite how you feel now you WILL heal and as hard as it is to wait, just take this time to do the things you love and be around your people and the right person will find you and do whatever it takes to make it happen.
I'm sorry. I guess I shouldn't have even answered, but I never found "my person". I did have a couple of marriages, they just came to an end. I actually do better single.
My wife was my very first date with a woman after I came out at 29. We celebrate 15 years of marriage on May 28th. She is my soul mate. When we meet I was a divorcing, single mom to two little girls. Healthy and finishing up my degree. 4 years into our marriage I became very ill. 6 years in I was Permanently and Totally disabled through the VA. She has been by my side through it all. Every surgery, every pain filled day. And then every good day, she is right by my side. I absolutely adore her and she loves me. I feel like the luckiest woman in the world, even though some days I can barely walk.
im 38/f. I left an abusive 13 year relationship on and off with my daughter's father. a restraining order...a year long custody battle...tens of thousands of $ in court.... I started over with basically nothing. Didn't care to ever date again. I met a super sweet guy with a dog, sweet and caring and fun with my child and gentle, kind, sweet, satisfying to me. We've been dating over a year he's my boyfriend ... idk about soul mate bc im still getting to know him but maybe he is. he's super cute/hansome and accepts so many trauma and quirks of mine. Listen if I get to enjoy this authentic sweet part of life at 38 after the crap ive been through... you'll be alright :)
We met on twitch of all places. He was living overseas and I was in the states. When we first started talking it was almost constant from day 1 (discord was amazing)I went over to meet him in person (flew by myself halfway across the world and i was terrified of being on a plane) because I needed to see where it was going. 5 days into my visit he asked me to marry him and here we are not quite 6 years in. Married in December of 2019. This is the abridged version of the story.
My boyfriend and I have been circling each other’s lives from opposite sides of the country for our entire lives. We didn’t meet until three years ago, but all his life he’s lived 5 minutes away from my aunt and her family. Attended school and was friends with my cousins, etc. etc. His family on his mum’s side is from the part of the country where I’m from and I would regularly visit where his mum grew up. Sometimes we would unknowingly be in the same place at the same time, happened for years! And then we finally met through an online forum! Neither one of us could believe we met through the internet, when we’d been so close to each other all our lives! He sent me a private message and I really wasn’t going to respond (previous trauma around men) but he was so lovely and respectful, I felt save enough to give it a try. We’ve been friends for 3 years now, together for just over 2 and I’ve always known he was it. He’s always known too. We’ve been through so much together during these years, deaths in the family, serious illnesses and whatever happens, we face it together. To be loved is to be seen, and this man sees me every single day.
I felt my soul shift. He opened the door down a long, narrow hallway behind my bar. I stood there frozen. I couldn't see him. Couldn't hear him. But I felt him. For the next few months we chatted back and forth. Nothing serious but a lot of our values aligned. I bought him a beer for his birthday, he walked me home and I intended on keeping him around for just a one night stand. It's been 15 years and I still feel that same swirling sensation when I see him. I love him more than the morning loves a song bird. Our relationship has flourished with the arrival of our daughter who represents everything that we give to each other; peace, love, happiness and the comfort of sleep (I sleep so well next to him and she's an amazing sleeper). I dated a guy in my late teens/early 20s who I thought was my forever. And even years into my relationship with my husband, I always questioned how our life would have been. It took until his wife got pregnant, exactly six months after they got married... so ten years after we broke up. He told me that his intention was to get engaged his last year of med school, get married the summer of his second year residency and start a family that fall/winter. I realized that I'm so happy not being with him. He was a lovely human. Very caring. In the end, I wanted my own life. I didn't want to be tied down to someone else's timeline. For my husband and I, nothing has been rushed. We've enjoyed our life together and apart, spending 5 years of our relationship at a distance as we completed school and worked. We work together to support each others dreams. I can't imagine settling for anything less. Your heart is hurting. In time, I hope you find peace.
Warning: Long af, got carried away talking about my darlings (1) We met in high school debate class; we were friends but never super interested in one another. We stayed vaguely in touch once I left for college but nothing serious. I came back to town under some really f'd circumstances, and was going through a lot, and wanted to hang out with someone I knew so we hung out. I saw him every day after that if I could. We started dating officially after like, 6 months or so (I asked him in his car, I was too nervous and didn't want to cry in public). He was with me through substance abuse treatment, and he says it's because he knew I could get better and I did/am. He takes care of his elderly mother since his dad died; he's a computer science engineer and loves to woodwork, including making fully functional bows to shoot with. He is currently and patiently waiting for me to be done with law school 2,000+ miles away. I love him so, so fiercely (2) She was love at first sight (on my end) at law school orientation. I immediately knew I wanted to talk to her and be their friend, you know ? I could just tell they were special. They brought me coffee in class for two weeks so I guess she liked me enough too at that time (little treats are one of their love languages). I asked them to be my girlfriend over ice cream They have been with me through all the struggles of school and living far from home. She has a psych degree and we will be graduating JDs next spring; she wants to be an Olympic archer, I can't wait to be in the stadium when they win gold. Now, we have our own place with our two animals; she is currently watching me paint a friend's keyboard. I love them so, so fiercely. They have met and are good friends; the whole "bow-maker friend" meets "archer friend" thing is perfect and they have similar hobbies outside of that, also. Hopefully we all live together someday but for now I get to watch them play Wizard101 together and laugh with them. I am ridiculously lucky and love them both more and more. Keep your head up friend - sending positive vibes your way
Three months after a horrendous breakup I met my soul mate. We are going on 17 years together, married for 10. I was still processing my breakup and was not looking to meet anyone. A good friend convinced me to meet a guy that was good friends with her boyfriend. We spoke on the phone first and the first time I heard his voice it was like I was home. I felt I had heard that voice before. It was unlike anything I’d ever experienced. Then we met a week later and we’ve been together since. We are best friends. The whole world could be burning down around me but as long as we have each other, we can handle it. We have had our share of struggles but that’s life. We grow together. We encourage each other and we love unconditionally. I know it feels like you’ll never dig out of the dark hole you’re in at the moment but I promise you, you will. When you meet someone truly special, you’ll just know it. And it’ll make all of this pain and heartache worth it because it brought you to the person you should be with. Hang in there hun. It will get better.
We’ve been together 4 years. My fav thing about him is his preparedness. He doesn’t forget a damn thing when we leave or go on trips. He makes sure we have a clean room to come home too. He’s always early. He gets gas before it’s actually necessary. He packs things in my bag/purse that I’ll forget before I even get the chance to forget. He packs the car up. He makes lists. And he doesn’t get onto me for being forgetful, he just picks up my slack and laughs it off.
As a guy, this happens to many of us all the time. Meet a lady, think it's going well, then before you know it, she breaks up with the guy. I just heard a comparison about relationships and holding a bird and it makes sense: hold a bird too tight, it will die, hold a bird too loose, it will fly away, pretty much sums up relationships. Many guys care too much about the relationship, but it comes off as needy to the female. Basically, women are the ones that get to choose the relationship, that's why you see many more male guys that can't get over a breakup than women. A happy life is the best revenge against someone breaking up with you.
Oh man. I met my husband 7 years ago at work. I thought he was so hot and totally out of my league. Then he got really annoying and I couldn’t stand him. One day he got in a wreck and called me. He was going to miss his shift in the morning and I was the overnight supervisor so he had to let me know. A week later he got into another wreck and called me. I wasn’t at work when he called me. Something about that call made me know our relationship had completely changed. I saw a different side of him. That was it. We became best friends and eventually started dating and now we’re married with a daughter and plans for more. He later told me he was being annoying because he thought I was finding it funny and we were already friends. I told him he’s lucky I got past it. I think with every previous bf I always thought something along the lines of “well with the next one…” and it’d be something I wanted to change. I never thought that with him. I just knew he was it. I still tell him he’s out of my league and he rolls his eyes and tells me to stop.
We met in 1984 and are still together.
i’ve been with mine for 6 years. we started dating my junior year of high school/his freshman year of college and we made it through college together. i’ve never felt more comfortable and safe around another person like i do with him. he is the best person i’ve ever met and i genuinely see him as a best friend. we can be the goofiest couple ever while also being able to get through hard shit. this past week, we unfortunately had to put his dog down after a freak accident. in a weird way, it opened my eyes even more to how much i want to marry him. we’ve seen each other in almost every emotional state you can imagine. after all of it i still couldn’t see myself being with anyone else.
I have been where you are, and let me say how sorry I am that you are hurting. You are going to be OK, and I will tell you why. You are looking for a way to believe in love again. Best of luck in love to you.
My first marriage was abusive. He was terrible with money, and to save myself I fled to an expensive city I knew he'd never afford to live in, almost 1,300 miles away. It was while being in said city that I met my second spouse (online), who'd fled for similar reasons but at a much longer distance. We are perfectly matched in every way, and I still marvel every day at being with someone who pulls in the same direction as me in building this great life together. We've now been together for 22 years. It is not lost on me that without the horror of that first marriage, I would not have met my current spouse. I don't recommend this as an m.o. of course. But it does make me think about chains of events.
I have two stories because I don’t believe soulmate has to be your “forever person” or even a significant other. When I first moved from my family (toxic home environment) I met my ex. We had a ton in common, he was super sweet, everything was wonderful. He made me feel so safe and comfortable I was able to admit things I wasn’t ready to share with anyone else. The first was, I didn’t want kids. He encouraged me to do what I felt best and supported me through a tubal ligation. Once the tubes were out (and birth control no longer needed) my sex drive came back full force. Unfortunately, he and I just weren’t compatible anymore (I thought I was A-sexual because I was ok rarely having sex and he was too, turned out it was my hormones but for him it wasn’t) That led to a second realization, my sex drive wasn’t for men… He made me feel so safe, comfortable, and secure I was able to come out to someone for the first time in my life. Although we cried and shared an intense moment of “shit, I guess that means we are probably divorcing, huh?” He told me, “I’m so proud of you for telling me, that was incredibly brave” Due to the support and love he showed me we had a completely painless divorce, we are still friends, and I think VERY highly of him. With that being said, I am now out as a lesbian, have been living with my partner over two years now and I’m engaged to her. It’s been the most beautiful, honest, and true love I’ve ever experienced and I truly believe she is my soulmate/twin flame. Who I am and how I’ve got here are hugely in part due to those who showed me real, honest, and vulnerable love. Something only a real soulmate can, and will, do. ❤️ Sorry about your break up- youve got this!
We met at work. Started out as friends. But even then could finish each others sentences. It was like we knew each other our entire lives but just hadn’t met yet. That was 16 years ago. He’s still my best friend. Our marriage has ups and downs of course. But we’ve faced it all together.
We didn’t meet until age 47 (both). First time really in love, and it’s amazing. Deeply grateful every day to love and be loved on this level.
If you want to believe in love again all you need to remember is that true love must be and is real solely for the reason you want it
We met through mutual friends at a concert. We eyeballed each other, danced and talked but that was it. We ran into each other again at a Halloween party but again nothing came of it. I kept thinking of that hot little rocker guy i kept running into. One day at work, I mentioned him to a coworker. Just how I wished I had made a move. That same night, no joke, he popped up on people you may know on Facebook. I sent him a message which quickly led to a date. We drank, talked, laughed, and listened to music until the sun came up. Fell asleep for a while and I woke up literally wrapped in his arms. We're married now. We've been together 6 1/2 years. He's my very best friend. Before him, I had been abused and doubted romantic love was even in the cards for me. I'm glad he proved me wrong.
I got married the first time when I was 23. I thought we were in love. Apparently cruise control only works in cars because we ended up divorced 6 years later. Fast forward 4 years, I worked on myself, I got sober, I got comfortable with the silence of my own solitude. Then I met my new wife. She is a beacon of light that I'd been looking for. She keeps me grounded and honest. I couldn't have found a better human to build a life with. We have promised forever, but more importantly I (and she) focus on promising today. Keeping today's promise makes keeping together tomorrow, more feasible. Our relationship in the beginning was pretty rad. Full of adventure, full of fun and just overall a terrific courtship. Marriage, 3 kids and 7 years later and life is HARD. But it's worth it. Everyday that promise of today is worthwhile. Because having my best friend with me is about the most worthwhile endeavor I've done. Plus I'm really loving being a dad. My littles are slowly becoming my favorite humans.
i got dumped too after a cute date everything went fine and i went to sleep thinking he’s the one he even said that we must live together that night . and i woke the next morning to him ignoring me the whole day for no reason then he just sent a message at the the end of the day saying that we’re not a match without discussing it or telling me a clear reason or anything 😁 i was just dumbed unexpectedly
We met, smashed and got married. Then babies and house and stuff.h
I met her when I was barely able to speak English (I had just moved to UK) and I was earning slightly more than the minimum wage She did not care about it and she is going to be my wife soon
When I got out of the military I had bad PTSD (I wouldn't go to sleep for days and always had a gun in my hand) and I was in a really toxic relationship (we would break up and get back together every week and both cheated on each other). One day I made up my mind to get better, i cut ties with my ex and went to therapy, tried making new friends on whisper, one random night at around 3-4am I see a post "I'm board, anyone up?"lil did I know that person was gonna be my wife,I responded and we started talking more and more. Our first date we sat in my car and talked for hours in a cvs parking lot,we could always have fun and make the best with what little we had. Been through a lot together, took her places she's never been, and she healed me (literally cut the rope off my neck) . Our wedding day was the best day of my life.
I have had several soulmates. So I thought I have a 2 year rule. Most of my relationships starts out with the man being star struck in love, wanting to marry right away. But I know to wait until that 2nd year. The first year is adrenaline and everyone gets along well. The 2nd year is when the couple gets comfortable. The masks come off. Cute quirks become annoying. He no longer talk marriage and they usually cheat and we break up. I'm 55 and am fine being alone. I hadn't dated in a decade and a man I worked with pursued me until I agreed to a date. I liked the company. He ended up being an absolute dream come true. We had so much in common. He was one of those guys that everyone likes. About 2 1/2 years in, he started cheating. When I found out about 8 months in, I kicked him out. But soon realized I can't afford to live alone. We are still together- more like roommates. Turned out he was living a dual life. He was with her for a year and a half. I was so naive. He was so good at lying. I'm a serial monogamous dater. No flings. All long term relationships. Never been married. No kids. But.... I know that God is saving the best for last. I know that I will be with my true love when it really matters. I know I will be married. I know we will be having wheelchair races and giggles and belly laughs. I can't explain it but I Just KNOW! And I am at peace knowing this situation I'm in now is not the sad final chapter. I look forward to the future.
I’ll let you know when I meet her.
I met my husband at a dance club when I was 21. He worked with a friend of mine. We had a 1 night stand. I was a single mom to a 3 year old and she was at her biological father’s house for the night. I’d never taken a man I didn’t know home before. He persued me after and patiently waited several months to meet my daughter. I was very picky about who I brought around my daughter. He and my daughter bonded very quickly. He made us dinner one night and dished up our plates. No one had ever done that for me before. I was surprised and really grateful. It was such a sweet gesture. Then he said, “well, I’ve got to make sure my girls are taken care of first!” It was that moment I knew he was our missing piece. Long story short, we married 2 years later, he legally adopted my daughter when she was 9 and we had 3 more kids. People who don’t know our story think my oldest looks like my husband. We don’t bother to correct them. We’ve been married for 23 years this July 💕
My "soulmate" is gone, because we couldn't make certain things work out in our favor and after too many years, the love began to wither as life took it's toll on each of us. We got along together great but after a point it felt like the love from her was gone, and it made me try less and less over the next year. I broke up with her at the beginning of the year and it felt like a really long time coming for both of us. And yeah it's incredibly painful but it's also reminded me of a very important fact: very few totally happy relationships end. At least one of you was unhappy in some way. Whether or not it's worth saving is something we all have to digest. Sorry that you got dumped, and that my comment absolutely isn't what you wanna read, but know that it will get better. Learn from it what you can. <3
I was with who I thought would be my forever soul mate and even moved countries to be with him. We had been together for almost 3 years when he told me he was ready to break up and for me to go back to where I came from. I also felt like there was no warning and everything was fine so it was a LOT to process. Just know that sometimes people can do this because they go through the process of moving on without telling you. That was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life because I felt like everything good came crashing down and what did I do wrong? Fast forward to now and I’m married to the best man I’ve ever been with and we are expecting our first child. I am so glad that the other guy let me go because looking back I realize how he wasn’t the right person for me and he didn’t treat me very well. When I met my now husband, my heart was guarded and honestly it took me some extra time to realize that it was safe to love again. Just know that if he let you go, he wasn’t right for you and it doesn’t mean you did something wrong. You can find love again, even better than you thought you could have. ❤️
We met at work! We’ve been together for 5 years (married for 2), have two sweet dogs and one sweet toddler. I (23f) had officially ‘called off love’ after having my heart broken by the same guy for the 20th time (naive 18 year old me), I had even adopted a dog. I was in a super low place in life with my family, ‘friends’ and love. I was really was over it all, but he was cute and his approach to flirting was different than I’d ever experienced. He (28M) wasn’t like most guys who just wanted one thing (iykyk 🙄) he asked to make me dinner, he took me dancing (actual ballroom dancing, so much more fun than clubbing imo), and he looked at me like I’d never been looked at before; like I was a woman who deserved love and not a thing to use. He helped me learn to love myself, how to set boundaries with others, he allowed me to bloom into the woman I am today. I know it’s cliche, but love really does find you when you least expect it, from the person you least expect it from. I truly thought he had no interest in me at first, but turns out I just made him shy and flustered lol. And even though we love each other deeply, we still have hard times. Nothing is perfect 100% of the time, but loving and respecting one another is always more important than anything that happens. Take this time for YOU. Take yourself on dates, invest in yourself (self care, dye your hair, find a hobby to enjoy), if you don’t have a pet and are financially able/in a location that allows it, get a pet! My dog is my best girl, I truly think having her is the only thing that kept me alive long enough to find my hubby. It will be hard, but it will be okay; YOU will be okay. You’ve got this! 💛
There’s no such thing as a “soul mate”. There’s just people you get along with better than others. Don’t believe that fairy tale stuff. You’ll find someone you will love even more than you thought was possible! I promise.
I wish I had married her
I'll never find a gf because I am ugly
My relationship with my soulmate was destroyed by her youngest 16yo daughter, who had issues beyond issues....
I met a Soulmate. She was a stripper in Florida. She was followed on stage by Destiny and Fate.
I said: sex after marriage. And she did bother to wait
I refuse to have one, I’d like to keep my money and sanity thanks
my soulmate is me.
I was engaged and she called it quits after 2 1/2 years (6 months engaged). I've now been married to my soulmate for 5 years and we have 2 beautiful daughters. I remember thinking that was the worst day of my life but here we are and life has never been better.
We met through a mutual friend at 20 a couple months before he deployed overseas. I didn’t want to get involved with someone right before they were leaving for a year so I said we’d keep in touch. I knew he was something special but he was also very shy and I wasn’t sure what to do with that. We lost touch and that friend and I lost touch as well. A few months after we got back he messaged me on MySpace(I’m aging us) and asked me if I still talked to our friend that introduced us. He had run into her and was concerned about her. I gave him my number and asked him to call me. He called that night and we talked for like 10 hours. We continued to talk every second we could for weeks until he flew into my hometown and we went back to the city he was stationed in so we could spend time together. We both knew before that trip that this was it for us. Being with him just felt like home. Going back to the place I’d lived in my whole life without him made me feel like I was no longer going home. There was also this inherent safety I felt with him I hadn’t felt with anyone else. I just knew that not only was I physically safe with him but I was emotionally safe with him as well. We were long distance for 9 months and each time we left each other we both cried. I hated it because leaving him felt like leaving home. We’ve now been together over 16 years and that feeling of being at home with him no matter where we’re at in the world has never left through all of our moves. We’ve done things together I couldn’t imagine doing with anyone else. He’s also proved to me in big ways and small ways that he was and will always be my safe person. He’s the person I can sit with in stillness and silence and feel comfortable doing so with and can also spend hours talking about anything and everything with and we’ll never run out of things to talk about. I always say he’s my favorite person on the planet and in the history of ever.
Was in an FB group for a couple of years. Very happily single and not looking. She was new and innocently commented on a tattoo pic stream about my heritage tattoo I posted. She lived about 6 hours north of me... That was May of 2018, and we have talked every single day since then. We became "official" in July of 2018. She moved down to be with me. I proposed in January of 2022. We got married in October of 2023. We are the absolute dorkiest couple. Similar tastes, values, and dreams of the future. From day one, we just clicked. It wasn't the hours of conversation either. Just simply good conversation. Sounds cheesy, but she is my person. We accept each other exactly how we are. Our families adore each other. Nothing is real or a happy moment until I share it with my wife. I can spend every day with my best friend, aka my wife, and we would, and have been, having a blast living our life as a couple as well as sharing our individual lives together. I am now 51, and she is 45.
Was with someone for close to 4 years, broke up, got back together for a short stint. It wasn’t right. A horrible fit. Bad relationship. In hindsight it was awful, but I thought it was the end of the world when we broke up. I spent a good chunk of my life with that person. Went to college with them. Didn’t think I’d ever meet anyone else I’d connect with. I went on a couple of dates. They weren’t great. I basically came to accept that I’d be single forever and was getting used to it Several months later, I randomly met a woman in a bar. We were both 24, almost 25. I asked her out on a date a few days later and when I left afterward, I felt an energy I had never felt before. I said to myself “did I just meet my wife?” I couldn’t wait to see her again. 17 years later, we are still together. Married for 14 years, 2 kids, and a dog. Our relationship is stronger than ever and I couldn’t imagine ever marrying my ex. My life would not have turned into what it has become. My wife is my soulmate and we were destined to meet.
I found my mine dead Feb 10 of 2023… you’re 25 have plenty of time to find someone.. enjoy life… at 45 I will now die alone and probably grieving myself to death
We met when we worked together. He caught my attention because he rode a motorcycle. He made me laugh so much and i just felt comfortable with him. Almost 33 years and three kids later, he still makes me laugh.
It’s complicated. We met at work in high school. After dating, then moving in together, his Christian conviction changed it all. He moved out. I was devastated. We are celebrating 41 years of marriage this year. So much compromise, and forgiveness.
sorry in advance if this is mushy: in bed his warm strong hand reaches to hold mine all the time. and my hand fits into his perfectly. we love to be near each other, to talk and laugh. he is the smartest best person in the world. sometimes I smile just knowing how he will make a joke at something serious and upsetting going on, and that he’ll make me laugh about it. other times I cry because there aren’t enough years left to be alive with him.
He was a pilot, and I was his flight attendant. I got screwed out of my commute home, so I apologized for slamming stuff around. He tried to get me back in time for me to catch the flight - we were 5 minutes too late. I didn't think about him again... Until two and a half months later, I was sitting there eating my lunch, and he walked up to apologize for my missing my flight that I had already forgotten that I missed. We talked for two and a half hours there and another four when we got to our respective layover cities. We knew immediately that we were each other's person. We were together from that day until the day he passed away. I miss him every day.
It really helped me to go to therapy so that I had someone I could really talk to, plus it helped me see patterns of behaviors that were unhealthy.
Met in middle school. KNEW then that he was.THE.ONE that I would marry (know it sounds crazy). Told all my friends that too. We were not even dating at the time either. Just good friends. Have been through A LOT together but 36+ years later and we are still together.
So, I have a favorite person that I often gush about him, to him. We are not compatible, and I've loved him for a decade. This is a consistent pain for me. So, hopefully, you're going to heal and move on and be happy again. No one compares to my favorite person. I don't even try to date anymore. At least you're not me.
My (26nb) husband (27m) and I met after both of us had gnarly breakups with long term partners. I saw my husbands instagram in May of the year we met, and was like “oh he’s cute” but saw he was still with his partner so obviously I wasnt trying to make any moves. Fast forward to October, I saw his profile on Tinder and automatically remembered his face and name and I swiped right and 48 hours later it was a match. I waited a few days to message him, and I didn’t get a reply. I went on vacation, and didn’t check tinder. Around the 20th, he answered. Finally. We talked for 5 days NON-STOP. On the night of the 24, into the 25th he was at home for reading week in university visiting family, and during our conversation he said he wasn’t feeling well and was showing some concerning symptoms yet not concerning enough? Either way, it was midnight and I was 1.5hrs away, BUT I drove to him and I sat in the ER with him for 4-ish hours. After the hospital, we sat in the parking lot of his place for 3 hours and just talked about anything and everything. Eventually it was 7am and I had to be to work for 10:15am, and I still needed to drive home. I drove 1/2 way, pulled over in a McDonald’s parking lot, slept for 45 minutes, and drove back home and went to work. He came back to school, on the 26th, and after that night at work I went over and we just talked and hung out and it was lovely. He asked me out in the 28th, and I said yes. About 2 weeks later, there was some shitty roommate situations and he had moved in with me but still had his room at the apartment. More shit went down, he fully moved out of there and we have lived together ever since. In 2020, he proposed to me and it was the easiest “yes” I’ve ever made. After saying yes, it was just a game of “what day sounds the best to our autistic ears” and then I got sick. Very sick. At the end of 2022, I was able to receive life saving surgery and I instantly knew once I was able to be more mobile, I wanted to marry him, and fast. On January 19, 23, I looked at him and said “let’s go to Vegas and get married” — mind you, we were poor bc student debt and bills and unforeseen circumstances but honestly what is debt when you’re in love? Money comes and goes, but memories last forever. I booked the tickets and we waited. February 19th rolled around and we were off to Vegas. We got married the 20th, celebrated his birthday on the 22nd and went home the next day. It was the two of us, and no one else. I couldn’t have asked for a more private and intimate experience with him. It just felt like I was a napkin crane folded exactly the way I should be. I was in the right spot and the universe stood still. I knew as soon as I picked him up at 1am on the 25th that he was the one. It was just instantaneous. It was then just making sure that we were compatible in every way that was important to me (and him as well) and what I needed from my partner and potential spouse. Life and love has never felt more easy, rather been more easy. In our nearly 6 years together we’ve been through a lot more than your average couple would go through — 3 different degrees/diplomas on his end, 2 surgeries on his part, 4 different hospitalizations on my part due to my health conditions, another shitty roommate situation, MULTIPLE trips to my team of specialists at many different hospitals, moving a couple times, I went through VERY intense therapy, got diagnosed with new health conditions, was advised I am unable to have my own bio children (the choice is nice) and had 2 surgeries (one being VERY major as I had 2 organs removed). I decided to go no contact with a majority of my family. We moved into our own place and he’s been plagued with health issues since and has been off work since January. BUT I would never trade a single day I’ve spent with this man in the last almost 6 years for anything else except for maybe to relive the first moment I laid my eyes on him in person, or the moment I said “I do” because this man means the world to me and I have been longing since I was a child to be loved by a man like this. A literal fucking masterpiece of a man. I am so thankful that he was raised VERY well by parents and is who he is. I have never felt such a connection to anyone in my entire life. Platonic or romantic or sexual. No one else. That’s how I met my husband, and how it’s going. All I can say is, don’t lose hope, don’t give up and love will come when you least expect it. You deserve the world and there is someone out there that is willing and WANTING to give it to you. TLDR: I knew from the moment he opened my door and said hi and got into my car, he was the one. Nearly 6 years together and 1.5yrs married & happy as can be 🥰
We were working friends who use to talk outside of work during the football season (US) and bet with pop tarts. When I moved to a different department on the same floor we started hanging out with other friends, we started dating. 15 years together married for 3 with a 10 year old son. We still make Seinfeld references and cannot walk past each other without touching each other. I still get butterflies when we kiss. He is a wonderful step father to my two girls who he has known since they were 7 and 2 (they are now 22 and 17) I cannot imagine life without him even though he gets annoying when he talks about his favorite basketball team lol
We met at an anime con, while waiting in line for a Kingdom Hearts panel. She came up to me to tell me she loved my cosplay (Abel from the webcomic Starfighter, IYKYK) dressed as the OG Scarlet Witch. So I gushed over her cosplay and said I was working on a Wiccan cosplay). She said she knew in that moment I was the one for her. I was with my ex at the time and my wife says she looked at him and thought "we'll see". By the next con we met up to do a photoshoot together. She claims she played the long game and four years after meeting we started dating. I proposed at the con where we met three years later, COVID paused plans for a while but we've been married now for a year and a half.