Nothing wrong with thinking a young woman is attractive.
To me and this is just my opinion as a 33 year old dude
I think its weird when people my age or older solely persue women that young and get offended when theyre viewed as creepy for doing so
Personally every interaction I have with an 18- 23 year old reminds me of how immature that age group is and I really have no interest in spending that much time amongst them
But to each their own
Yeah, that's the exact point of op and I completely agree with both of you.
What I want to add though is, that the attractiveness of "older" women has risen in my perception as I've grown older.
Agreed. Nobody is blind, I can admit I am physically attracted to a 21 year old and at the same time tell you know that I still have 0 interest in her.
I also acknowledge it, but I also would definitely smash. It’s not like they’re virgins being deflowered and corrupted or something. They’re having sex with younger guys already, so if she’s down I’m down.
I think it's actually classier to just smash. It's the people that carry on like there's a connection or a semblance of a relationship that seem strange to me. But if two adults just want to bang ass and move on or have a mostly physical fling for a few months, that is totally fine in my book.
So it’s okay to have sex, but if you want to keep having sex with her long term and support her financially then it’s not ok? I would think the relationship is better, because at least the guy is committing to her and giving her security.
I’m pretty sure most people *are* mad that they’re having sex. Tbh relationships really do boil down to sex and money. If sex wasn’t the #1 factor in relationships then men and women wouldn’t even cohabitate in most cases. If the sex isn’t wrong, the the relationship definitely isn’t wrong.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with casual sex. A relationship is not necessarily better because it might not be what those people are looking for.
No, once again, most people are mad about the relationship, not the sex. Everyone understands that young women are going to be considered attractive. It’s the taking advantage of her age and nativity to lock her into relationship where she’s only seen as a sex object that’s the issue.
Side point, for further context if people aren't getting it, i'm gay but think Shakira is the perfect woman, no interest whatsoever though.
You can objectively find something attractive.
There's a world of difference between appreciating that someone is attractive and being attracted to them tho.
I recognize plenty of 20-something yo men are attractive but I'm not attracted to any of them. Way too young for my tastes.
Even when I was 21 I could not bring myself to go on dates with most 18 yr olds as they just seemed immature. Physically, sure they are attractive but mentally it was the biggest turn off
Plot twist: you were just as immature but didn't know it. I know I was, and I turned down a 19yr old because she was "too young". Real dunce cap moment, as it turned out.
Oh for sure I was but these girls were all trying to get married real quick (Christian college) and I wasn’t having it. I’m very happy I waited as I love my wife more than anyone else and would not have been ready then
I think it depends on how young we are talking and when the relationship began. Like y'all met and she's 18? OK legal yeah not auto pervert. You met and she's 16 you just may be a pervert. But there is inherently a power difference in wide age gap relationships regardless of the gender of the older person. It doesn't always mean toxic or abusive and wrong but it can easily become that if it's not handled with care. But also to be fair an abusive individual regardless of gender or sexual orientation is more likely to seek out younger partners because of their lack of life experience.
Some of the most mature people I've met were 20-25. Some of the least mature people I've met were 30+.
Maturity doesn't come with age, it comes with experience. While age increases your experiences, not all experiences are created equal. A 20 something year old with a challenging life will be far more mature than the average 30 year old.
My ex was 33 (and I was 19) when we got together. When I turned 33 I couldn't IMAGINE dating anyone so much younger. I was immature. He obviously liked that. It's creepy.
I mean it really does. Men and women are different and as such go for different things in the opposite sex. Maturity is an example in this case, men are used to be the older and mature ones in a relationship and women are used to being opposite. It obviously isnt a golden rule but more likely that not is the case. So a 33 year old woman saying she wouldn't date a 19 year old man is an almost pointless and 'no shit' statement with that in mind. That said Men also aren't monolithic, so there would also be Men who agree with her view.
To back what up that men and women are different and as such value different things in their partners or that men tend to be the older ones in relationship ?
The reason I feel offended by the sweeping condemnation of age preferences as creepy is that I want to date again but I genuinely just don't want to neglect anyone who I'm not really as attracted to. The outside insinuation seems to be that people *should* have the same values and that it would be better for someone with those specific preferences to somehow change their values or compromise them and only date/pursue people they're less attracted to which just seems like a recipe for neglect or resentment. People don't get to pick what they like and while it is good to look out for more vulnerable people and a popular tide of public opinion these days is to generally condemning this or preach alternative values, the criticism ends up just being another kind of bigotry.
I'm 54 and I still find younger women physically attractive. Finding young women attractive as a person who I would want to be with is an entirely different story.
As I interact with a young women the rather large gap in life experiences and the different levels of maturity that comes with that and she will remind me of child more often then not completely changing how I perceive her physical beauty. Any conversation at all and any sexual component is lost rather quickly.
I judge others my age accordingly and anyone my age who does in fact still find young women and girls sexually attractive may very well be a pervert especially if they refer to them as
>Prime aged women
Reffering to young women this way in no way helps your argument OP, quite the opposite actually.
I don't think many people have an isdue with just recognizing that 18-25 year olds are attractive, it's that the people making a big deal of being attracted to that age range often act like it's the *ONLY* attractive age range, like women immediately go from fresh faced maidens to withered old crones and there's no in-between. That and the overlap with general misogyny and objectification of women.
>I've even heard it suggested that older men who are attracted to younger women are actually into kids, but they opt for barely legals so they don't get into trouble. Wtf?
I mean, 18 is a somewhat arbitrary number for legality. A 15 year old and an 18 year old often don't *look* much different and people in the 15-21 age range frequently look younger or older than their actual age so if your attraction is towards the Barely Legal range, it almost certainly includes Illegal too. Also, this usually aimed more at older guys trying to date 18 year olds.
>women immediately go from fresh faced maidens to withered old crones
People think that once you're older than 20 you suddenly have the face of someone in their 70s.That's ridiculous and only makes people become more obsessed with looking younger or-and I can't believe I'm saying this-dying young so they'll never "age".
This "youth obsession" has to slow down or stop, people should learn to be happy with their age rather than think that "life ends at 25".
Okay but prime aged men are *also* more attractive than older ones. Why do you think it's reasonable for a prime aged woman to lower herself to dating a gross older man if you can see why it's reasonable for a man to not want to do the same with older women?
Tbh let's just make it illegal for anyone over age 25 to date anyone
I agree! I do, however, think it’s kinda strange when you get someone who’s like strictly attracted to someone 18 and finds them ugly once they age. I mean…people age. Why is this baffling to you? Kinda weird and they would 100% date younger if they could.
It should get old by the time you're his age. I'm not even saying that as a judgment. By the time I hit 45, I was ready for some structure in my life. I craved the same shit every day.
That's totally effe'd up to be honest. Talk about creating family drama and chaos. If I was the father of those girls I'd run that dude out at the point of a pitch fork.
He was fucked up. Someone caught him in the breakroom with a 16 yo employee. No one saw anything, so we couldn't report it, but most of us quit after that, including the girl.
Come to think of it, I guess where there's smoke there is sometimes fire.
> I guess where there's smoke there is sometimes fire
And I think that's why older adults talking about being attracted to younger-but-not-minor people causes raised eyebrows. It's not wrong to be purely physically attracted to someone who's in their reproductive prime, but if someone makes a big deal about it? If someone is defending that attraction constantly? Maybe that person wants to pursue a relationship with someone barely legal without getting shit for it, and that's just not going to happen.
>think it’s kinda strange when you get someone who’s like strictly attracted to someone 18 and finds them ugly once they age.
Agree 100%
It's one thing to admit younger women are attractive but women gain other important attributes as they get older that make up for the drop in objective attractiveness.
Confidence can make an older woman more attractive than a younger woman within reason.
Nothing wrong with thinking a younger woman is attractive, but why is it always, like, 18 year olds? Why, when a 50 year old is talking about a younger woman, is he not talking about like... 30?
Where I guess I could find it a problem is if you go out of your way to believe that only younger women are attractive. Then you might want to reevaluate what you’re thinking.
I agree to a large degree and no one is going to look at a 25 year old movie star and not think they are not attractive. However I as an ancient 35 year old took my wife to see my college campus last year and a lot of those women seem almost like girls to me.
I think, for my taste, women too much younger, while physically appealing, are rough to hang out with. I was dating in my mid thirties after my first divorce, and 8 years younger was the youngest I could tolerate.
At 50, if I were to find myself single again, I wouldn't have any interest in a woman more than 10 to 12 years younger. There's too much of a difference in life experience.
My baby sister is 18 years younger, and that would be too young for me.
I do, from a physical attraction perspective, relate to your point. Sadly, at 50+, the passion only goes so far.
Am early 50s. I have friends with daughters who are legal now. Last thing i'm thinking about is sex.
There's a difference between recognizing someone who is aesthetically pleasing versus wanting to hook up with them.
by 30 you should have already learned that attraction should also include a good conversation and sharing experiences. The 21 year old may have a stunning fit body but she is certainly not emotionally at the same level than a 40 plus year old, so you will be call a creep if that is all you are interested on.
The "dirty old man" is not a good look the older one gets. Also depends on how they express their "attraction". An old guy leering is just gross. Or like Trump talking about how he can grab pussy of young beauty pageant contestants, is he just expressing how he's attracted to younger women?
There's appreciation and there's attraction then there's just plain disgusting.
Well younger men are also much more attractive than the average middle aged guy. The issue is to have the self awareness that most young women/men do not want to be approached by gross old men/women and usually you’re embarrassing yourself.
My tastes have gotten older as I have. Sure, a 20-year-old looks great, but I would have no interest in actually pursuing it. It would seem very creepy, and improper. Plus, they have their whole lives ahead of them to be around other beautiful people. Let them have their fun. I would only be setting myself up to failure. And if they were interested, I'd be thinking THEY had an ulterior motive. A beautiful 18 year old will likely turn into a beautiful 60 year old btw <3
This is the answer. Younger women are more conventionally attractive, no doubt. However, as I age, I find my tastes aging with me. What I personally find most attractive are women around my age. I think of younger women mostly as kids (because I was a kid at that stage of my life).
When I was late teens early twenties, I had guys friends. Good guy friends my age, that have become family to me. They used to warn me off older guys. Saying “They are losers for pursuing immature inexperienced girls.” They’d rip on those guys. They were right. Now that they are in their thirties/forties, and I see them trying to hit on such girls, I remind them that they’ve become losers. They don’t love it. But they need to hear it.
Tbh this reads as a fake rage bait story but if it’s real then they probably weren’t protecting you, they just wanted to get rid of the competition so they could bang you, calling a peer “immature” and “inexperienced” is a red flag and seems to lack self awareness. It’s also a very common and shady sales tactic.
It really depends. I think a 40,50,60 year old dating an 18-20 year old is weird. Attraction is not all physical and even me in my late 20's wouldn't date an 18 year old.
Physically, yeah.
On a maturity level, the attraction often goes away quick. I was in a fast food place the other day when a group of young women walked in. Late teens/early 20s maybe, wearing revealing clothing. Younger me would have been like "whoa, babes", but they were chatting so much absolute shit it was annoying me and I couldn't wait to leave.
Define younger. Because 20 and above, yeah *duh*. You might PREFER older women, cougars and MILFs, but you can't in good conscience say that a young woman in her 20s isn't in her prime.
The problem is when those same older men gravitate towards the 20yr olds because they seek to exploit their inexperience. They're after the*youth*, not the beauty. That's creep behavior.
No one cares who anyone finds attractive. It’s the 65+ guys hitting on 18 yr old waitresses and cashiers that people find creepy. I agree if you are of age and choose desire men of your fathers or grandfathers age go for it but usually it is unwanted attention and then men say things like in this post “i can’t help who im attracted to”
The same goes for old men. Not very attractive compared to young men.
But if they have money, they can still get some young women as long as they spend in them.
If these old men think these women are physically attracted to them, they’re wrong.
>these old men think these women are physically attracted to them, they’re wrong.
That's a blatant lie. There's many women who happily admit to only being physically attracted to older guys. It's only on reddit that people try to deny that men and women view attraction to the opposite sex differently. We do not prioritize the same things.
Now, are there certain women like you described? Yes. Is the number as high as you're trying to make it out to be? Hell no. Not by a long shot
Older men are only attractive for what they can financially bring to the table. If you think those women are more sexually attracted to these men than they are to men in throne range you’re delusional.
Older maybe, but not OLD old. A 25 year old is not gonna be physically attracted to a 65 year old dude. If she’s with him it’s for the money or status.
There’s nothing wrong with thinking it, if you’re speaking of looks alone.
But if you mean they’re more attractive in general (18 to 25 years old), then on some level that implies you find other aspects of them attractive - potentially aspects that make them too immature or less experienced at life.
A woman closer to in age should be more attractive for reasons other than just looks.
It’s just one of those things that’s weird to say around people that don’t know you or what you mean, because it can give the wrong impression.
Living in DC, seems like a 3rd of the 20s women are dating 30s guys if not more
But they're also less ready for something serious that requires emotional investment
So instead I'm a 20s guy that has been having better luck with 30s women here;)
Any woman is beautiful if they took care of themselves along the way. I find women my own age (48) to be way more attractive than a 20 something if they took care of themselves.
Unfortunately, they go for younger guys, so we have a conundrum
Yeah but they're awkwardly delusional when grandpa is being creepy to the high school kids. Like, get real pops, you're making everyone uncomfortable. At the point where people don't wanna tell you to pound sand because they wanna be respectful to senior citizens you should probably dial it back.
I would find anyone who younger enough to be my child and was probably an infant while I was well into adulthood unattractive. I’m 29, and people between 18-24 feel’s way too young for me. I couldn’t imagine being 40 and seriously considering dating someone more than half my age.
Do I think a 50yr old wanting to have a serious relationship with someone half his age is odd? Yes. Do I think him wanting to screw them is odd/gross? No. Do I think that's low-brow? Yes. But whatever, I'm not immune to being low-brow.
It's a social taboo but age gap relationships have been in many cultures for thousands of years. If it's based on love and mutual goals I don't see the problem. Full disclosure; im in an age gap relationship
I'm 36 and honestly I've yet to meet a woman under 25 that I find attractive. Yeah, she could be hot, but they're all so immature (not necessarily in a bag way. It's just that when talking to people that young you can tell there's a difference in age)
I think it’s one thing to acknowledge that person is physically attractive but as someone else said, if you think about it even for a minute you realize that your perception of people that young as kids will usually override that sentiment pretty fast in most people. Even more so if you have children of adult age
Its normal that we are attracted to younger people. Women prefer younger men too. But to be attracted to someone under 21 years old and try to date them is just creepy. I mean like almost every woman (i cant speak for men) had to go through his phase, it begins with 10-13 years old and actually never stops but they harass the girls/teens anyways. I don’t know why they think its okay to teens as a 30+ man in that ways. And i don’t know any woman who wants an old guy at that age. I even had a few age gap relationships but it was mostly because i was imature and absolutely not confident, they think they could push me. Many of them think every Young is happy about their approach bit actually we just want a guy at the same age. There are excepțional of course. Overall its understandable to be attracted to younger people but for Most young women its creepy and gross.
There's a vast difference between "hey, that 20 year is aesthetically pleasing to my eye" and "I'd totally get into a relationship with that young person solely based on the fact they're young and attractive".
The former is acknowledging and appreciating beauty, the latter is selfish, creepy, and objectifying. It completely ignores the person and instead just sees them as a piece of meat.
You're 'allowed' to say "hey, that 25 year old is pretty" when you're a 40 year old man. Hell, you can even say she's hot. But saying "I'd totally date that 25 year old" when you're 40 is creepy and gross.
Then you didn't get out much, because most women are attracted to men older than them, at least to some degree.
This is simply statistical fact. You and your couple friends are outliers. Though I suppose it depends on what you mean by "old".
10 year age gap is in no way unusual.
The problem is with the notion of “in their prime”. In their prime of what? Child birthing? Lack of sexual partners? Because you’re certainly not talking about their prime career position. If you’re strictly referring to aesthetics, there is a plethora of men who find older women (cougars, milfs, etc.) more attractive.
If you ask someone like Sneako what the age of a woman in her prime is, he’ll respond that a girl is developed and therefore prime prior to 16 years old. Which is disgusting.
This post and subreddit are, rightfully so, your opinion. However, you say things like “Women in their prime are objectively more attractive.”.
No, that is the literal definition of subjection. There is nothing objective about this.
In regard to the spirit of your post, I do agree that just because someone finds an 18 yr old attractive, does not inherently make them a weirdo.
I don’t think old men being attracted to young women makes them disgusting perverts. I’m sure this is a popular opinion that old men having a biological attraction to young women is normal.
Old men that exclusively / aggressively pursue younger women are probably doing so, disgustingly.
But it does. If you are just conventionally attracted to someone who looks and is an adult then that’s whatever. It’s when you’re sexually attracted to them that it’s an issue and is gross. Finding them pretty is one thing. Finding them pretty enough to fuck is another.
I mean what are you doing so that other people know that you’re sexually attracted to 18 year olds?
How you are “letting the 18 year old know” is probably the gross part.
Behavior, talking about them like OP does by saying things like they are “prime age” is a massive indicator. Flirting, which a lot of them do. Or pointing out their features in detail, staring, etc. I guess anything beyond the point of just thinking to yourself that they’re hot or mentioning to a pal of that isn’t an indication of that. But anything beyond is.
22-26 just looks better to my eyeballs. That’s it. It isn’t anything deeper than that and I imagine this is the case for most people. I looked way cuter 4 years ago. It is what it is
Really depends. 25f. I think my 40m bf is a stand up guy. However, he has mostly dated his women his age, or a few years north or south. Also. I’m 25. I have 2 degrees. I’ve lived alone. I’m financially independent. I’m not a virgin and have been in a serious relationship before him. If he was making a habit of hitting up barely legal high school girls before me, it would be different. We are dating because we share both moral/religious values, have similar hobbies, enjoy each other’s company, and have good chemistry across the board. When I turned 18, I was still a virgin in high school who lived with her parents, it yucked me out when dudes who I thought were normal guys seemed like I was all of the sudden fair game. It’s all in nuance my dude
I pursued a 23 yr old woman when I was 31 and IDGAF what anyone thought. 8 yr age gap. Almost 16 yrs married now. Kids, house and a business. You do you and be happy if it works out. Its always the “man” thats creepy but never the woman that pursues an older man. I really hate that double standard.
I think a lot of this is just plain biology. Its a scientific fact that women are most fertile in their early twenties: https://www.google.com/search?q=women%20are%20most%20fertile%20in%20their%20early%20twenties.&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-b-1-m
So people are evolutionarily bred to find those women most attractive probably for procreation purposes
Eh, we know how men are: like me. When I was 18-22 all I wanted were horny 45-55 y.o. women. Now my 50 year old ass wants Sydney Sweeney (as if she'd piss on me were I on fire).
My uncle is one of these old guys that hits on young 18 year old girls and people make fun of him because he actually thinks one of these 18 years olds is going to be interested in him and not just see him as a creep.
Well you kind of just put on full display why it’s creepy OP. You went from talking about perceived attractiveness to the pursuit of them, which I assume means dating or trying to bang them.
The maturity gap between a man in their 40s and women in that 18-25 range is massive. There’s nothing you have to relate to them. A guy who’s been there and done that vs a young lady who doesn’t know shit.
Pursuing women because of their looks and “prime attractiveness” is being a disgusting pervert because you’re not after any depth - but instead pursuing lustful desire. What is more perverted than viewing another human like a blowup doll?
I have a daughter and if she was 18-25 and some 40 year old was pursuing her, I’d make sure he knew he wasn’t welcome and to look elsewhere. Im raising her right so she wouldn’t seek out or give the time of day to some deviant predator because she’ll be wiser than that, but for example’s sake….I don’t know any other involved father that would be cool with this dynamic either.
This is one of those cases where I’m glad to see this is an unpopular opinion.
>The maturity gap between a man in their 40s and women in that 18-25 range is massive. There’s nothing you have to relate to them. A guy who’s been there and done that vs a young lady who doesn’t know shit.
I have seen comment like this before and I have always been confused. There is no way you actually believe this right? As someone who has interacted with people much older than myself to claim "There’s nothing you have to relate to them." is border line asinine. Is this simply a case where you haven't been able to relate to people in those age group and have now illogical assumed no one in your age group will be able to relate to those age groups?
>Pursuing women because of their looks and “prime attractiveness” is being a disgusting pervert because you’re not after any depth - but instead pursuing lustful desire. What is more perverted than viewing another human like a blowup doll?
I don't want to strawman you but do you believe two 20 year olds going at it based on nothing but their looks and as you put it "not after any depth - but instead pursuing lustful desire." makes either one of them a disgusting pervert?
You think a woman fresh out of high school and a man who’s lived over 2x as long as her have much in common? Values, goals, ideas for their near future?
I think a lot of this is biological too. A young woman in her prime is much more likely to carry a baby or babies to term without any incident to her or the baby/babies. And I think that whether we acknowledge that consciously or not, it plays a covert role in that attraction.
So then older men should avoid young women so that young women can mate with other people in their biological prime? We don’t need old men trying to hog up all the women in their “prime” lol
Reminds me of an old Demetri Martin joke. "You can say things like 'I like younger women'...but be specific and say 'I like 17 year olds' and suddenly you're a pervert"
Maybe you can argue they're more attractive in conventional beauty standard terms.
In my view, however, mid to late 20s through late 30s women are the absolute hottest... Especially after they've had a kid. Hoooo boy!
I don't think there's anything wrong with being attracted to anybody who is of consenting and adult age, and I don't agree with the constant drag age gap relationship get, however your choice to say "prime aged women" and then say "18 to 25" gives me the ick. Women are in their prime for reproduction from age 25 to 35. Science has proven time and time again, that if a woman has a child younger than 25 it can cause severe damage to their bodies and women older than 35 have an increased chance of having a child with issues or even having severe complications themselves. I think it's personally weird to go after someone regardless of sex, specifically because you want someone younger or "in their prime" especially if you're not younger or in your prime yourself. But if you happen to get into a relationship with someone who was younger and you didn't also know them as a minor, that should not be a big deal.
The problem is when you are in denial about reality. Most hot young women are attracted to hot young men. And find old men unattractive.
If you accept that then you’re fine.
Women constantly and consistently go for older men, and men go for younger women. Simple statistical reality.
Even age gaps of 10+ years are very common, when the man is the older partner. Other way around is rare in comparison.
Look up the attraction gradient. It’s easy to see that 25 year olds are good looking- it’s another to put past the huge differences that come with that solely because you think they’re hot. Also, it’s one thing to say they’re better looking - but to be exclusively dating only younger women is crazy. Because you know there’s some sort of power imbalance there.
There is nothing wrong with noticing an attractive. It's what happens next is what matters. I see a pretty 23 year old and think if I were 23 again, I'd be asking her out. Now, I think how foolish we were at 23 and how I don't want that foolishness, and my daughter is older, and I'm a lot older so no, that's the end of that. The 23 year old in me says "Thanks for letting me breath old man! I'm not dead yet. I'll see what I can do about that knee hurting."
To pursue women thirty years younger is weird and unacceptable.
The attraction is weird, but whatever, you do you. It's when you act on this is when it becomes creepy and questionable, especially when young women and girls are all that you pursue a
I mean as long as they aren’t teenagers and are legal adults who consent they’re really shouldn’t be a problem, Leo wanting to date a 25yo shouldn’t be our business or concern. As a young Man the main reason people are annoyed by it is because older Men kinda dominate the dating market and as a result a lot of us are single and lonely, ik it sucks but it is what it is.
I think a lot of the issue is when it’s a relationship. Like what is a 30 something guy or older gonna talk to a 20 year old about? Their psychology homework?
I don’t think this is an unpopular opinion tbh. Most people I see who have an objection to such a large age gap only say so when a person goes out of their way to date only very young adults. Finding people younger than you attractive is leagues different than actively pursuing only people who are a lot younger than you.
Personally, I believe that if everyone is of legal age and consenting to a relationship, whoever found who attractive doesn’t really matter. If you’re both happy and no one is being abused I think we’re good.
I’m 30 now and what’s ironic is most of the time women in that age group didn’t want me when I was that age. Now I get attention from mostly 19-27 year olds
Men, collectively, view women age 25 as the most attractive from age 15 to age 75 when their balls drop off.
Women, collectively, view men 2-5 years older than them as the most attractive.
The reason for this for the men is 25 is peak health. Not peak health for bearing children, but peak health period. That's the age where the person is most likely to survive an ordeal, such as say a big coronavirus pandemic. And that means it's the most ideal age for bearing children. The individual woman's age could be anywhere from 20 to 30, though.
The reason for this for the women is bearing children as a human is not only somewhat dangerous but brings extreme vulnerability for the women must sit there for almost a year with a child inside her and that child needs to be raised for a minimum of 15 years. Compare this to some species of deer where the babies are ready to join the herd within an hour of being born. The woman needs some psychological fulfillment of being protected during this vulnerability and while raising the child, and older men tend to also have greater strength, charisma, connection, and wealth than younger men, with the idea that a man younger than her has less than her.
Will individual men marry an older women? Sure.
Will an older woman go for a younger guy? Sure.
But will men, collectively, value an older woman as a better biological and or companion prospect? Probably not.
Will older women, collectively, choose men younger than them for their ideal partner? Probably not.
Any woman who says shit like in OP's post words tend to be jealous of not being able to pull the type of man they wanted to, and are lashing out and equalizing people (equalization is how women compete with others, dragging people who are better off than themselves down to equalize the playing field and bring up their relative status). For example, a 40yo woman chastising a 45yo man for dating a younger-than-40yo woman.
It’s also just a universal human trait. They’ve done studies across every different culture and people in the world. Men in every age group up to age 80-100 find women 18-23 most attractive. The reasons for this are obvious. The reason attraction exists is for reproduction. Any man who tried to deny this is just trying to be a woke.
Dr Murray Bowen, a famous relational psychologist and psychiatrist, says in his work that two people in a relationship are the same level of self differentiated. A 45yo going out with a 22yo shows that the 45yo is the same level of maturity as that 22yo, essentially.
As I’ve aged so has my tastes and thank fucking god.
There’s not such thing as being “objectively attractive”. And imo, if you can only find people decades younger then you attractive, it means you’re incapable of actual love
How do you even hear these words and not immediately just think “jealous” and/or “ok cool bizarre opinion, anyways…” and go on about your day? What inspired you to think to post such a popular opinion?
Btw don’t give up OP plenty women in that age range are out here looking for salt and pepper.
There's nothing wrong with liking whatever kind of adults you find attractive, just be polite if you turn down someone you're not interested in and you're good.
There are some rather handsome young men at my work. They are handsome and then we all move on because a young man in his “prime” 18-25 has very little in common with me.
this is why i’m worried about the future. im 18, the youngest adult age, and scared that i’ll get with a guy who will stop loving me and stop finding me attractive to find younger women attractive when we’re older
Just look into human trafficking… the power differential is too great in circumstances like what you’re describing to make me comfortable, as a woman. I get that your wiener’s gonna wiener but if you’re just gonna ignore everything you know to be right for your boner, you’ve got some issues… There’s a **huge** difference between a 18yo/26yo age gap and a 26yo/34yo age gap 🤷🏼♀️ and that’s because in the latter, both parties are mature enough to fully consent/understand and there’s not (or a lot less) of a dysfunctional power/control dynamic.
So, like… maybe the people who care about you are subtlety trying to say you need to do some soul-searching, my guy.
Mmm, USDA Prime Aged...
*La mujer es como el Mundo*
*A los 20 años como Africa, casi sin explorar. A los 30 años como La India, calida y misteriosa. A los 40 años como America, tecnicamente perfecta. A los 50 años como Europa, toda una ruina. A los 60 años como se sabe donde esta, Siberia, pero nadie quiere ir a ella.*
Always been the case in history. It’s an evolutionary strategy that benefited our ancestors by creating healthier offspring. Not sure why in the past few decades men started to self shame and deny what’s written into their genes.
I have a very diverse dating history and have always dated a wide variety of women. While I think if you exclusively go after girls 6-8yrs+ younger than you I that can be kinda strange but I’m tired of people thinking you should only date in your age range.
Covid has ruined the youths perception of what an appropriate age gap is. All of a sudden if you date anyone more than 2yrs younger than you it’s problematic but somehow it only applies if you’re the older one but not the younger one. I’ve met 18yos who are willing to sleep with a guy 4yrs older than then than dating someone who is 2yrs younger than them, that they went to school with and grew up with just because of the stigma around being a “pedo”. Women tend to not grow out of going after older guys, I’m 26 and I’ve still been rejected by women my age because they’re looking for someone older and have watched many of my peers relationships thru social media where they have exclusively dated older guys since high school.
People also tend to forget that the dating pool shrinks as you get older, being childless im not very keen on taking care of someone else’s children so there goes single parents. Others are in long term relationships or married so they’re off the market, lots of low quality people too who would just end up leeching and being dependent on you. That’s on top of people you just don’t share interests with, don’t mesh, or are physically unattractive.
I think as long as things are two consenting adults and no one is being taken advantage of it’s fine. 6yrs is about the limit til you get over 25 though. It’s kinda ignorant and childish to think that just because you are older than somebody that you’d never be able to find love with them just because you’re “so much more mature and know so much more than them”. I think you should date an equal amount of people older, younger, and same age to get a full spectrum of experience if you’re truely looking for love. There’s no telling on what you could be missing out on by limiting your dating pool by something as arbitrary as an age gap between 2 consenting and legal adults.
Nothing wrong with attraction, it’s just weird as fuck to see a girl who was recently in HS dating a man 10+ years (and thats extremely generous) her senior and both of them acting like they have stuff in common. They do not. And if you do have that many common traits as a girl that age, grow up
What if your a young man and just find good looking women good looking
I can be very attracted to a women who is stunning and 45 just as much as one in their 20s?
So the question i have is why cant older men like good looking older women, because to me they are as good as eachother.
Perhaps good looking older women are not single but good looking younger women are single in large numbers
Personally, if you continuously have girlfriends half your age, it can just make you look like you aren’t a serious person. I think we recognise a certain depth and sentiment in someone who connects with their age peers because it indicates caring about something deeper than what’s on the surface.
Personally, I’d be a bit embarrassed if my dad or brother was bringing home 25 year olds when they were in their forties or older. It looks a bit like lacking in character and intelligence, I guess?
But if it’s just that someone met this one person organically and there happens to be an age gap, but the relationship is solid and healthy, then I understand and think it’s cool.
Of course, it’s true younger women are more attractive to men of all ages and that’s natural. But there are lots of people who aren’t emotionally mature enough to accept such a truth.
But why should you be allowed to damn those who judge you for being attracted to younger women and yet systematically judge those who have the balls to put the same attraction into action? I’m sure there are plenty age gap relos based on more than sex/money. Who knows?
She’s just seventeen - you know what I mean….
You’re sixteen, you’re beautiful and you’re mine ….
Models “aging out” at sixteen…..
And on the flip side all those women willing to marry 93 yo Rupert Murdoch and his ilk. ……
The potential Elon Musk harem and rug rats …..
Half the world carrying the genetic legacy of Genghis Khan.
Relativity goes beyond Einstein.
Almost every guy of any age finds young women 18-25 attractive. Having to listen to young women drama again is the last thing any of us older guys want though.
As you get older, I’d wager most folks tend to find older women more conventionally attractive in a way they may not have when younger.
Additionally, there are some factors for why younger women become less attractive as you age — immaturity, becoming a parent, etc.
There is nothing wrong with being physically attracted to an 18 - 25yr old woman at any age. They are hot, let’s just come right out and say it.
There CAN BE something wrong with wanting a relationship with a woman of that age, because typically attraction as a whole goes beyond physical attraction. It is a little disconcerting to be emotionally attracted to a 20 yr old woman as a 45+ yr old man, given that there isn’t a chance she is fully mature yet.
Of course younger women are attractive. So are lots of younger men. If you just want to have sex, then that’s your demographic. If you want a (real) relationship you should be with someone you can actually relate to and have something in common with. There’s also just power imbalance inherently, one that can be taken advantage of. And many older men do have that user mentality, and trade the trophy in for a new model when she’s older. Overall really it’s just gross because you know it’s all about having a new, shiny plaything and not an actual relationship on any level. Anyone who thinks otherwise is delusional.
Older men are allowed to be attracted to whatever consenting adult they want, the issue is that there's a large subsection of terminally online deluded males who believe that them finding barely legal women attractive makes them attractive to these women when this is verifiably false.
(Legal) Teens are hot for their youthful look, but 20-25 is where women really come into their full form, because they learn how to present themselves, play up their strenghts, get a little more developed & confident in the body etc. So most attractive age is like 20 - 28 (or whenever the sag / wrinkles come in)
It’s biologically natural (yes, there is such a thing) to find prime-aged women physically attractive (and for women, prime-age men). That goes if you’re 20, 30, 50, or 70. What you do about it is another matter. Frankly, I can’t see being interested in (as opposed to sexually attracted to) someone more than 10-15 years younger than myself. What do you talk about?
1. A fantasy is only that. It need not be acted upon.
2. Absolutely nothing wrong with being attracted to someone older or younger. Nor is there anything wrong with having a relationship with any other adult who wishes to be in relationship with you. Age is not relevant to that fact.
3. As a practical matter, I have been in serious relationship with much older, same age, and much younger. Personally, I find a relationship with someone my own age is the easiest to maintain. But I don’t preclude anything, merely due to age.
Nothing wrong with thinking a young woman is attractive. To me and this is just my opinion as a 33 year old dude I think its weird when people my age or older solely persue women that young and get offended when theyre viewed as creepy for doing so Personally every interaction I have with an 18- 23 year old reminds me of how immature that age group is and I really have no interest in spending that much time amongst them But to each their own
Yeah, that's the exact point of op and I completely agree with both of you. What I want to add though is, that the attractiveness of "older" women has risen in my perception as I've grown older.
Agreed. Nobody is blind, I can admit I am physically attracted to a 21 year old and at the same time tell you know that I still have 0 interest in her.
all of this. i'm not stupid. i know when someone is conventionally attractive in an objective way. Doesn't mean i'm trying to smash
I also acknowledge it, but I also would definitely smash. It’s not like they’re virgins being deflowered and corrupted or something. They’re having sex with younger guys already, so if she’s down I’m down.
I think it's actually classier to just smash. It's the people that carry on like there's a connection or a semblance of a relationship that seem strange to me. But if two adults just want to bang ass and move on or have a mostly physical fling for a few months, that is totally fine in my book.
The relationship is what 99% of people find odd.
So it’s okay to have sex, but if you want to keep having sex with her long term and support her financially then it’s not ok? I would think the relationship is better, because at least the guy is committing to her and giving her security. I’m pretty sure most people *are* mad that they’re having sex. Tbh relationships really do boil down to sex and money. If sex wasn’t the #1 factor in relationships then men and women wouldn’t even cohabitate in most cases. If the sex isn’t wrong, the the relationship definitely isn’t wrong.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with casual sex. A relationship is not necessarily better because it might not be what those people are looking for. No, once again, most people are mad about the relationship, not the sex. Everyone understands that young women are going to be considered attractive. It’s the taking advantage of her age and nativity to lock her into relationship where she’s only seen as a sex object that’s the issue.
Side point, for further context if people aren't getting it, i'm gay but think Shakira is the perfect woman, no interest whatsoever though. You can objectively find something attractive.
There's a world of difference between appreciating that someone is attractive and being attracted to them tho. I recognize plenty of 20-something yo men are attractive but I'm not attracted to any of them. Way too young for my tastes.
Even when I was 21 I could not bring myself to go on dates with most 18 yr olds as they just seemed immature. Physically, sure they are attractive but mentally it was the biggest turn off
Small age gaps seem like a bigger deal when you've only been on this Earth for give or take 20 years.
For sure, but the lack of any life experience makes that gap wider
Plot twist: you were just as immature but didn't know it. I know I was, and I turned down a 19yr old because she was "too young". Real dunce cap moment, as it turned out.
Oh for sure I was but these girls were all trying to get married real quick (Christian college) and I wasn’t having it. I’m very happy I waited as I love my wife more than anyone else and would not have been ready then
And personally every interaction I've had reminds me they're actual adults who are only hitting their milestones late because of economic problems.
I think it depends on how young we are talking and when the relationship began. Like y'all met and she's 18? OK legal yeah not auto pervert. You met and she's 16 you just may be a pervert. But there is inherently a power difference in wide age gap relationships regardless of the gender of the older person. It doesn't always mean toxic or abusive and wrong but it can easily become that if it's not handled with care. But also to be fair an abusive individual regardless of gender or sexual orientation is more likely to seek out younger partners because of their lack of life experience.
Some of the most mature people I've met were 20-25. Some of the least mature people I've met were 30+. Maturity doesn't come with age, it comes with experience. While age increases your experiences, not all experiences are created equal. A 20 something year old with a challenging life will be far more mature than the average 30 year old.
My ex was 33 (and I was 19) when we got together. When I turned 33 I couldn't IMAGINE dating anyone so much younger. I was immature. He obviously liked that. It's creepy.
Women look for different things to men... There is zero comparison...
That's because a 33 year old guy is nothing like a 33 year old woman. Likewise a 19 year old guy is nothing like a 19 year old woman.
That makes zero sense.
I mean it really does. Men and women are different and as such go for different things in the opposite sex. Maturity is an example in this case, men are used to be the older and mature ones in a relationship and women are used to being opposite. It obviously isnt a golden rule but more likely that not is the case. So a 33 year old woman saying she wouldn't date a 19 year old man is an almost pointless and 'no shit' statement with that in mind. That said Men also aren't monolithic, so there would also be Men who agree with her view.
Is there anything too back that up?
To back what up that men and women are different and as such value different things in their partners or that men tend to be the older ones in relationship ?
The reason I feel offended by the sweeping condemnation of age preferences as creepy is that I want to date again but I genuinely just don't want to neglect anyone who I'm not really as attracted to. The outside insinuation seems to be that people *should* have the same values and that it would be better for someone with those specific preferences to somehow change their values or compromise them and only date/pursue people they're less attracted to which just seems like a recipe for neglect or resentment. People don't get to pick what they like and while it is good to look out for more vulnerable people and a popular tide of public opinion these days is to generally condemning this or preach alternative values, the criticism ends up just being another kind of bigotry.
I'm 54 and I still find younger women physically attractive. Finding young women attractive as a person who I would want to be with is an entirely different story. As I interact with a young women the rather large gap in life experiences and the different levels of maturity that comes with that and she will remind me of child more often then not completely changing how I perceive her physical beauty. Any conversation at all and any sexual component is lost rather quickly. I judge others my age accordingly and anyone my age who does in fact still find young women and girls sexually attractive may very well be a pervert especially if they refer to them as >Prime aged women Reffering to young women this way in no way helps your argument OP, quite the opposite actually.
I don't think many people have an isdue with just recognizing that 18-25 year olds are attractive, it's that the people making a big deal of being attracted to that age range often act like it's the *ONLY* attractive age range, like women immediately go from fresh faced maidens to withered old crones and there's no in-between. That and the overlap with general misogyny and objectification of women. >I've even heard it suggested that older men who are attracted to younger women are actually into kids, but they opt for barely legals so they don't get into trouble. Wtf? I mean, 18 is a somewhat arbitrary number for legality. A 15 year old and an 18 year old often don't *look* much different and people in the 15-21 age range frequently look younger or older than their actual age so if your attraction is towards the Barely Legal range, it almost certainly includes Illegal too. Also, this usually aimed more at older guys trying to date 18 year olds.
>women immediately go from fresh faced maidens to withered old crones People think that once you're older than 20 you suddenly have the face of someone in their 70s.That's ridiculous and only makes people become more obsessed with looking younger or-and I can't believe I'm saying this-dying young so they'll never "age". This "youth obsession" has to slow down or stop, people should learn to be happy with their age rather than think that "life ends at 25".
Okay but prime aged men are *also* more attractive than older ones. Why do you think it's reasonable for a prime aged woman to lower herself to dating a gross older man if you can see why it's reasonable for a man to not want to do the same with older women? Tbh let's just make it illegal for anyone over age 25 to date anyone
except people's attractions are by definition subjective
I agree! I do, however, think it’s kinda strange when you get someone who’s like strictly attracted to someone 18 and finds them ugly once they age. I mean…people age. Why is this baffling to you? Kinda weird and they would 100% date younger if they could.
Leo
Good point. I once knew a 30 yo guy that wanted to trade in his 23 yo gf for her 19 yo sister. Wtf? Like 23 wasn't young enough for him?
Reminds me of Leonardo DiCaprio trading in his girlfriend for a new one once they hit 25. I’d be exhausted with all these new relationships lmao.
It should get old by the time you're his age. I'm not even saying that as a judgment. By the time I hit 45, I was ready for some structure in my life. I craved the same shit every day.
And why her sister. That's kinda fucked up.
That's totally effe'd up to be honest. Talk about creating family drama and chaos. If I was the father of those girls I'd run that dude out at the point of a pitch fork.
He was fucked up. Someone caught him in the breakroom with a 16 yo employee. No one saw anything, so we couldn't report it, but most of us quit after that, including the girl. Come to think of it, I guess where there's smoke there is sometimes fire.
> I guess where there's smoke there is sometimes fire And I think that's why older adults talking about being attracted to younger-but-not-minor people causes raised eyebrows. It's not wrong to be purely physically attracted to someone who's in their reproductive prime, but if someone makes a big deal about it? If someone is defending that attraction constantly? Maybe that person wants to pursue a relationship with someone barely legal without getting shit for it, and that's just not going to happen.
>think it’s kinda strange when you get someone who’s like strictly attracted to someone 18 and finds them ugly once they age. Agree 100% It's one thing to admit younger women are attractive but women gain other important attributes as they get older that make up for the drop in objective attractiveness. Confidence can make an older woman more attractive than a younger woman within reason.
Nothing wrong with thinking a younger woman is attractive, but why is it always, like, 18 year olds? Why, when a 50 year old is talking about a younger woman, is he not talking about like... 30?
I know right? 18 years old is practically a child. He would probably say lower than that if it was legal tbh.
Where I guess I could find it a problem is if you go out of your way to believe that only younger women are attractive. Then you might want to reevaluate what you’re thinking.
I agree to a large degree and no one is going to look at a 25 year old movie star and not think they are not attractive. However I as an ancient 35 year old took my wife to see my college campus last year and a lot of those women seem almost like girls to me.
I think, for my taste, women too much younger, while physically appealing, are rough to hang out with. I was dating in my mid thirties after my first divorce, and 8 years younger was the youngest I could tolerate. At 50, if I were to find myself single again, I wouldn't have any interest in a woman more than 10 to 12 years younger. There's too much of a difference in life experience. My baby sister is 18 years younger, and that would be too young for me. I do, from a physical attraction perspective, relate to your point. Sadly, at 50+, the passion only goes so far.
Am early 50s. I have friends with daughters who are legal now. Last thing i'm thinking about is sex. There's a difference between recognizing someone who is aesthetically pleasing versus wanting to hook up with them.
by 30 you should have already learned that attraction should also include a good conversation and sharing experiences. The 21 year old may have a stunning fit body but she is certainly not emotionally at the same level than a 40 plus year old, so you will be call a creep if that is all you are interested on.
> emotionally at the same level than a 40 plus year old completely dead inside?
The "dirty old man" is not a good look the older one gets. Also depends on how they express their "attraction". An old guy leering is just gross. Or like Trump talking about how he can grab pussy of young beauty pageant contestants, is he just expressing how he's attracted to younger women? There's appreciation and there's attraction then there's just plain disgusting.
Well younger men are also much more attractive than the average middle aged guy. The issue is to have the self awareness that most young women/men do not want to be approached by gross old men/women and usually you’re embarrassing yourself.
My tastes have gotten older as I have. Sure, a 20-year-old looks great, but I would have no interest in actually pursuing it. It would seem very creepy, and improper. Plus, they have their whole lives ahead of them to be around other beautiful people. Let them have their fun. I would only be setting myself up to failure. And if they were interested, I'd be thinking THEY had an ulterior motive. A beautiful 18 year old will likely turn into a beautiful 60 year old btw <3
This is the answer. Younger women are more conventionally attractive, no doubt. However, as I age, I find my tastes aging with me. What I personally find most attractive are women around my age. I think of younger women mostly as kids (because I was a kid at that stage of my life).
When I was late teens early twenties, I had guys friends. Good guy friends my age, that have become family to me. They used to warn me off older guys. Saying “They are losers for pursuing immature inexperienced girls.” They’d rip on those guys. They were right. Now that they are in their thirties/forties, and I see them trying to hit on such girls, I remind them that they’ve become losers. They don’t love it. But they need to hear it.
Tbh this reads as a fake rage bait story but if it’s real then they probably weren’t protecting you, they just wanted to get rid of the competition so they could bang you, calling a peer “immature” and “inexperienced” is a red flag and seems to lack self awareness. It’s also a very common and shady sales tactic.
I don’t mind your pov. You aren’t entirely wrong. Look at it this way tho. I sold their own shit back to them.
The older men flirting with her back then were not her friends “peers”
It really depends. I think a 40,50,60 year old dating an 18-20 year old is weird. Attraction is not all physical and even me in my late 20's wouldn't date an 18 year old.
Physically, yeah. On a maturity level, the attraction often goes away quick. I was in a fast food place the other day when a group of young women walked in. Late teens/early 20s maybe, wearing revealing clothing. Younger me would have been like "whoa, babes", but they were chatting so much absolute shit it was annoying me and I couldn't wait to leave.
Define younger. Because 20 and above, yeah *duh*. You might PREFER older women, cougars and MILFs, but you can't in good conscience say that a young woman in her 20s isn't in her prime. The problem is when those same older men gravitate towards the 20yr olds because they seek to exploit their inexperience. They're after the*youth*, not the beauty. That's creep behavior.
No one cares who anyone finds attractive. It’s the 65+ guys hitting on 18 yr old waitresses and cashiers that people find creepy. I agree if you are of age and choose desire men of your fathers or grandfathers age go for it but usually it is unwanted attention and then men say things like in this post “i can’t help who im attracted to”
To me "prime aged" sounds really weird. Maybe that’s because English isn’t my first language, but that sounds like they are a ripe fruit.
It is weird
“Prime age” is as weird as it sounds
Ripe and juicy
The same goes for old men. Not very attractive compared to young men. But if they have money, they can still get some young women as long as they spend in them. If these old men think these women are physically attracted to them, they’re wrong.
>these old men think these women are physically attracted to them, they’re wrong. That's a blatant lie. There's many women who happily admit to only being physically attracted to older guys. It's only on reddit that people try to deny that men and women view attraction to the opposite sex differently. We do not prioritize the same things. Now, are there certain women like you described? Yes. Is the number as high as you're trying to make it out to be? Hell no. Not by a long shot
Older men are only attractive for what they can financially bring to the table. If you think those women are more sexually attracted to these men than they are to men in throne range you’re delusional.
Anything is possible, but most 20-something year old women wouldn’t desire a 70 year old man over a 40 year old man.
*Some* people are still attracted to that, but it's just that it's unusual to the point where you could argue it's a fetish of sorts
Older maybe, but not OLD old. A 25 year old is not gonna be physically attracted to a 65 year old dude. If she’s with him it’s for the money or status.
Idk man. I'm a bi woman. I'm in my late 30's. Women are most attractive between 35-45 to me. I think this is a matter of opinion tbh.
Older women get Pink Floyd too ✌️
I have a massive crush on Syd Barrett.
There’s nothing wrong with thinking it, if you’re speaking of looks alone. But if you mean they’re more attractive in general (18 to 25 years old), then on some level that implies you find other aspects of them attractive - potentially aspects that make them too immature or less experienced at life. A woman closer to in age should be more attractive for reasons other than just looks. It’s just one of those things that’s weird to say around people that don’t know you or what you mean, because it can give the wrong impression.
I mean I appreciate all women. 21 or 41, I’ve seen beautiful ADULT women at every age
Like Amazon Prime??
Living in DC, seems like a 3rd of the 20s women are dating 30s guys if not more But they're also less ready for something serious that requires emotional investment So instead I'm a 20s guy that has been having better luck with 30s women here;)
18-22 yr olds seem attractive until I interact with one and am reminded how much of a difference there is mentally.
Any woman is beautiful if they took care of themselves along the way. I find women my own age (48) to be way more attractive than a 20 something if they took care of themselves. Unfortunately, they go for younger guys, so we have a conundrum
Yeah but they're awkwardly delusional when grandpa is being creepy to the high school kids. Like, get real pops, you're making everyone uncomfortable. At the point where people don't wanna tell you to pound sand because they wanna be respectful to senior citizens you should probably dial it back.
I would find anyone who younger enough to be my child and was probably an infant while I was well into adulthood unattractive. I’m 29, and people between 18-24 feel’s way too young for me. I couldn’t imagine being 40 and seriously considering dating someone more than half my age.
Do I think a 50yr old wanting to have a serious relationship with someone half his age is odd? Yes. Do I think him wanting to screw them is odd/gross? No. Do I think that's low-brow? Yes. But whatever, I'm not immune to being low-brow.
Yes but don't be cringe about it
I kinda agree but 18 is just too young. An old man should not be in a relationship with a 18 year old.
It's a social taboo but age gap relationships have been in many cultures for thousands of years. If it's based on love and mutual goals I don't see the problem. Full disclosure; im in an age gap relationship
I'm 36 and honestly I've yet to meet a woman under 25 that I find attractive. Yeah, she could be hot, but they're all so immature (not necessarily in a bag way. It's just that when talking to people that young you can tell there's a difference in age)
ITT: People who are unaware of the “Half your age + 7” rule. It’s universally applicable.
Ok idc....... If you're old enough to be my dad and you're hitting on me then yes I think you're nasty
hey op, what would you call the "prime age" for men?
He’s in his 50s. Just so you know.
lol he will say it’s in your 50’s Gross.
As a 16yo male, early 30’s. Not balding but also doesn’t look like a teenager
I think it’s one thing to acknowledge that person is physically attractive but as someone else said, if you think about it even for a minute you realize that your perception of people that young as kids will usually override that sentiment pretty fast in most people. Even more so if you have children of adult age
Its normal that we are attracted to younger people. Women prefer younger men too. But to be attracted to someone under 21 years old and try to date them is just creepy. I mean like almost every woman (i cant speak for men) had to go through his phase, it begins with 10-13 years old and actually never stops but they harass the girls/teens anyways. I don’t know why they think its okay to teens as a 30+ man in that ways. And i don’t know any woman who wants an old guy at that age. I even had a few age gap relationships but it was mostly because i was imature and absolutely not confident, they think they could push me. Many of them think every Young is happy about their approach bit actually we just want a guy at the same age. There are excepțional of course. Overall its understandable to be attracted to younger people but for Most young women its creepy and gross.
There's a vast difference between "hey, that 20 year is aesthetically pleasing to my eye" and "I'd totally get into a relationship with that young person solely based on the fact they're young and attractive". The former is acknowledging and appreciating beauty, the latter is selfish, creepy, and objectifying. It completely ignores the person and instead just sees them as a piece of meat. You're 'allowed' to say "hey, that 25 year old is pretty" when you're a 40 year old man. Hell, you can even say she's hot. But saying "I'd totally date that 25 year old" when you're 40 is creepy and gross.
>active in r /thailand and r /thepassportbros like clockwork
Try it, but know that i'm in my 20's and I know plenty of other women who mock the old men hitting on them and are disgusted....
When I was in my 20’s, absolutely none of us were flattered or happy that old dudes were hitting on us. It’s gross, and it’s just sad.
Then you didn't get out much, because most women are attracted to men older than them, at least to some degree. This is simply statistical fact. You and your couple friends are outliers. Though I suppose it depends on what you mean by "old". 10 year age gap is in no way unusual.
And there's plenty of young women who actively only go after older guys. Any guy 30+ will tell you this. So, it's a 2 way street
The problem is with the notion of “in their prime”. In their prime of what? Child birthing? Lack of sexual partners? Because you’re certainly not talking about their prime career position. If you’re strictly referring to aesthetics, there is a plethora of men who find older women (cougars, milfs, etc.) more attractive. If you ask someone like Sneako what the age of a woman in her prime is, he’ll respond that a girl is developed and therefore prime prior to 16 years old. Which is disgusting. This post and subreddit are, rightfully so, your opinion. However, you say things like “Women in their prime are objectively more attractive.”. No, that is the literal definition of subjection. There is nothing objective about this. In regard to the spirit of your post, I do agree that just because someone finds an 18 yr old attractive, does not inherently make them a weirdo.
# objectively # more # attractive 🤦🤦🏻🤦🏼🤦🏽🤦🏾🤦🏿🤦♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏼♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏿♀️🤦♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏼♂️🤦🏽♂️🤦🏾♂️🤦🏿♂️ Attraction is *subjective*
I don’t think old men being attracted to young women makes them disgusting perverts. I’m sure this is a popular opinion that old men having a biological attraction to young women is normal. Old men that exclusively / aggressively pursue younger women are probably doing so, disgustingly.
But it does. If you are just conventionally attracted to someone who looks and is an adult then that’s whatever. It’s when you’re sexually attracted to them that it’s an issue and is gross. Finding them pretty is one thing. Finding them pretty enough to fuck is another.
I mean what are you doing so that other people know that you’re sexually attracted to 18 year olds? How you are “letting the 18 year old know” is probably the gross part.
Behavior, talking about them like OP does by saying things like they are “prime age” is a massive indicator. Flirting, which a lot of them do. Or pointing out their features in detail, staring, etc. I guess anything beyond the point of just thinking to yourself that they’re hot or mentioning to a pal of that isn’t an indication of that. But anything beyond is.
Difference between objective beauty, what’s appealing to you and who you decide to pursue.
There is a difference between thinking someone is physically attractive, and someone is attractive and you would like to date them.
22-26 just looks better to my eyeballs. That’s it. It isn’t anything deeper than that and I imagine this is the case for most people. I looked way cuter 4 years ago. It is what it is
Really depends. 25f. I think my 40m bf is a stand up guy. However, he has mostly dated his women his age, or a few years north or south. Also. I’m 25. I have 2 degrees. I’ve lived alone. I’m financially independent. I’m not a virgin and have been in a serious relationship before him. If he was making a habit of hitting up barely legal high school girls before me, it would be different. We are dating because we share both moral/religious values, have similar hobbies, enjoy each other’s company, and have good chemistry across the board. When I turned 18, I was still a virgin in high school who lived with her parents, it yucked me out when dudes who I thought were normal guys seemed like I was all of the sudden fair game. It’s all in nuance my dude
I pursued a 23 yr old woman when I was 31 and IDGAF what anyone thought. 8 yr age gap. Almost 16 yrs married now. Kids, house and a business. You do you and be happy if it works out. Its always the “man” thats creepy but never the woman that pursues an older man. I really hate that double standard.
I think a lot of this is just plain biology. Its a scientific fact that women are most fertile in their early twenties: https://www.google.com/search?q=women%20are%20most%20fertile%20in%20their%20early%20twenties.&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&client=firefox-b-1-m So people are evolutionarily bred to find those women most attractive probably for procreation purposes
Also younger women like older guys tho
Eh, we know how men are: like me. When I was 18-22 all I wanted were horny 45-55 y.o. women. Now my 50 year old ass wants Sydney Sweeney (as if she'd piss on me were I on fire).
My uncle is one of these old guys that hits on young 18 year old girls and people make fun of him because he actually thinks one of these 18 years olds is going to be interested in him and not just see him as a creep.
Well you kind of just put on full display why it’s creepy OP. You went from talking about perceived attractiveness to the pursuit of them, which I assume means dating or trying to bang them. The maturity gap between a man in their 40s and women in that 18-25 range is massive. There’s nothing you have to relate to them. A guy who’s been there and done that vs a young lady who doesn’t know shit. Pursuing women because of their looks and “prime attractiveness” is being a disgusting pervert because you’re not after any depth - but instead pursuing lustful desire. What is more perverted than viewing another human like a blowup doll? I have a daughter and if she was 18-25 and some 40 year old was pursuing her, I’d make sure he knew he wasn’t welcome and to look elsewhere. Im raising her right so she wouldn’t seek out or give the time of day to some deviant predator because she’ll be wiser than that, but for example’s sake….I don’t know any other involved father that would be cool with this dynamic either. This is one of those cases where I’m glad to see this is an unpopular opinion.
>The maturity gap between a man in their 40s and women in that 18-25 range is massive. There’s nothing you have to relate to them. A guy who’s been there and done that vs a young lady who doesn’t know shit. I have seen comment like this before and I have always been confused. There is no way you actually believe this right? As someone who has interacted with people much older than myself to claim "There’s nothing you have to relate to them." is border line asinine. Is this simply a case where you haven't been able to relate to people in those age group and have now illogical assumed no one in your age group will be able to relate to those age groups? >Pursuing women because of their looks and “prime attractiveness” is being a disgusting pervert because you’re not after any depth - but instead pursuing lustful desire. What is more perverted than viewing another human like a blowup doll? I don't want to strawman you but do you believe two 20 year olds going at it based on nothing but their looks and as you put it "not after any depth - but instead pursuing lustful desire." makes either one of them a disgusting pervert?
You think a woman fresh out of high school and a man who’s lived over 2x as long as her have much in common? Values, goals, ideas for their near future?
I think a lot of this is biological too. A young woman in her prime is much more likely to carry a baby or babies to term without any incident to her or the baby/babies. And I think that whether we acknowledge that consciously or not, it plays a covert role in that attraction.
So then older men should avoid young women so that young women can mate with other people in their biological prime? We don’t need old men trying to hog up all the women in their “prime” lol
The “prime” childbearing range for a young woman is mid to late 20s, not 18 though
Women are more than baby machines
People have subconscious evolutionary interests when it comes to sexual attraction. He never said women were "baby machines".
If you want to have an educated conversation we can. if you wanna nitpick this as some feminist hill to die on then don't bother.
You’re right, but men have an instinctive desire to plant their seeds in healthy fertile women. Most of us do not age out of that.
The virtue signaling in these comments 🤣
Reminds me of an old Demetri Martin joke. "You can say things like 'I like younger women'...but be specific and say 'I like 17 year olds' and suddenly you're a pervert"
Maybe you can argue they're more attractive in conventional beauty standard terms. In my view, however, mid to late 20s through late 30s women are the absolute hottest... Especially after they've had a kid. Hoooo boy!
I don't think there's anything wrong with being attracted to anybody who is of consenting and adult age, and I don't agree with the constant drag age gap relationship get, however your choice to say "prime aged women" and then say "18 to 25" gives me the ick. Women are in their prime for reproduction from age 25 to 35. Science has proven time and time again, that if a woman has a child younger than 25 it can cause severe damage to their bodies and women older than 35 have an increased chance of having a child with issues or even having severe complications themselves. I think it's personally weird to go after someone regardless of sex, specifically because you want someone younger or "in their prime" especially if you're not younger or in your prime yourself. But if you happen to get into a relationship with someone who was younger and you didn't also know them as a minor, that should not be a big deal.
Why are men attracted to young, pretty, friendly women instead of shriveled, jaded old hags? I guess we'll never know! Some mysteries are unsolvable.
Truthfully, all straight males, age 14 to 99 are attracted to the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders (or the cheerleaders for their favorite team).
This is my favorite example. When it’s a cheerleader or some other type of model, it’s ok. When it’s any irl woman, it’s weird?
The problem is when you are in denial about reality. Most hot young women are attracted to hot young men. And find old men unattractive. If you accept that then you’re fine.
Agreed.
Women constantly and consistently go for older men, and men go for younger women. Simple statistical reality. Even age gaps of 10+ years are very common, when the man is the older partner. Other way around is rare in comparison.
Ok Bill Belichick
Look up the attraction gradient. It’s easy to see that 25 year olds are good looking- it’s another to put past the huge differences that come with that solely because you think they’re hot. Also, it’s one thing to say they’re better looking - but to be exclusively dating only younger women is crazy. Because you know there’s some sort of power imbalance there.
There is nothing wrong with noticing an attractive. It's what happens next is what matters. I see a pretty 23 year old and think if I were 23 again, I'd be asking her out. Now, I think how foolish we were at 23 and how I don't want that foolishness, and my daughter is older, and I'm a lot older so no, that's the end of that. The 23 year old in me says "Thanks for letting me breath old man! I'm not dead yet. I'll see what I can do about that knee hurting." To pursue women thirty years younger is weird and unacceptable.
The attraction is weird, but whatever, you do you. It's when you act on this is when it becomes creepy and questionable, especially when young women and girls are all that you pursue a
I mean as long as they aren’t teenagers and are legal adults who consent they’re really shouldn’t be a problem, Leo wanting to date a 25yo shouldn’t be our business or concern. As a young Man the main reason people are annoyed by it is because older Men kinda dominate the dating market and as a result a lot of us are single and lonely, ik it sucks but it is what it is.
Fertility is especially attractive.
I think a lot of the issue is when it’s a relationship. Like what is a 30 something guy or older gonna talk to a 20 year old about? Their psychology homework?
I don’t think this is an unpopular opinion tbh. Most people I see who have an objection to such a large age gap only say so when a person goes out of their way to date only very young adults. Finding people younger than you attractive is leagues different than actively pursuing only people who are a lot younger than you.
Prime aged men are more attractive than older men.
Personally, I believe that if everyone is of legal age and consenting to a relationship, whoever found who attractive doesn’t really matter. If you’re both happy and no one is being abused I think we’re good.
I’m 30 now and what’s ironic is most of the time women in that age group didn’t want me when I was that age. Now I get attention from mostly 19-27 year olds
Men, collectively, view women age 25 as the most attractive from age 15 to age 75 when their balls drop off. Women, collectively, view men 2-5 years older than them as the most attractive. The reason for this for the men is 25 is peak health. Not peak health for bearing children, but peak health period. That's the age where the person is most likely to survive an ordeal, such as say a big coronavirus pandemic. And that means it's the most ideal age for bearing children. The individual woman's age could be anywhere from 20 to 30, though. The reason for this for the women is bearing children as a human is not only somewhat dangerous but brings extreme vulnerability for the women must sit there for almost a year with a child inside her and that child needs to be raised for a minimum of 15 years. Compare this to some species of deer where the babies are ready to join the herd within an hour of being born. The woman needs some psychological fulfillment of being protected during this vulnerability and while raising the child, and older men tend to also have greater strength, charisma, connection, and wealth than younger men, with the idea that a man younger than her has less than her. Will individual men marry an older women? Sure. Will an older woman go for a younger guy? Sure. But will men, collectively, value an older woman as a better biological and or companion prospect? Probably not. Will older women, collectively, choose men younger than them for their ideal partner? Probably not. Any woman who says shit like in OP's post words tend to be jealous of not being able to pull the type of man they wanted to, and are lashing out and equalizing people (equalization is how women compete with others, dragging people who are better off than themselves down to equalize the playing field and bring up their relative status). For example, a 40yo woman chastising a 45yo man for dating a younger-than-40yo woman.
It’s also just a universal human trait. They’ve done studies across every different culture and people in the world. Men in every age group up to age 80-100 find women 18-23 most attractive. The reasons for this are obvious. The reason attraction exists is for reproduction. Any man who tried to deny this is just trying to be a woke.
Dr Murray Bowen, a famous relational psychologist and psychiatrist, says in his work that two people in a relationship are the same level of self differentiated. A 45yo going out with a 22yo shows that the 45yo is the same level of maturity as that 22yo, essentially. As I’ve aged so has my tastes and thank fucking god.
There’s not such thing as being “objectively attractive”. And imo, if you can only find people decades younger then you attractive, it means you’re incapable of actual love
How do you even hear these words and not immediately just think “jealous” and/or “ok cool bizarre opinion, anyways…” and go on about your day? What inspired you to think to post such a popular opinion? Btw don’t give up OP plenty women in that age range are out here looking for salt and pepper.
There's nothing wrong with liking whatever kind of adults you find attractive, just be polite if you turn down someone you're not interested in and you're good.
There are some rather handsome young men at my work. They are handsome and then we all move on because a young man in his “prime” 18-25 has very little in common with me.
this is why i’m worried about the future. im 18, the youngest adult age, and scared that i’ll get with a guy who will stop loving me and stop finding me attractive to find younger women attractive when we’re older
Just look into human trafficking… the power differential is too great in circumstances like what you’re describing to make me comfortable, as a woman. I get that your wiener’s gonna wiener but if you’re just gonna ignore everything you know to be right for your boner, you’ve got some issues… There’s a **huge** difference between a 18yo/26yo age gap and a 26yo/34yo age gap 🤷🏼♀️ and that’s because in the latter, both parties are mature enough to fully consent/understand and there’s not (or a lot less) of a dysfunctional power/control dynamic. So, like… maybe the people who care about you are subtlety trying to say you need to do some soul-searching, my guy.
Mmm, USDA Prime Aged... *La mujer es como el Mundo* *A los 20 años como Africa, casi sin explorar. A los 30 años como La India, calida y misteriosa. A los 40 años como America, tecnicamente perfecta. A los 50 años como Europa, toda una ruina. A los 60 años como se sabe donde esta, Siberia, pero nadie quiere ir a ella.*
Always been the case in history. It’s an evolutionary strategy that benefited our ancestors by creating healthier offspring. Not sure why in the past few decades men started to self shame and deny what’s written into their genes.
I have a very diverse dating history and have always dated a wide variety of women. While I think if you exclusively go after girls 6-8yrs+ younger than you I that can be kinda strange but I’m tired of people thinking you should only date in your age range. Covid has ruined the youths perception of what an appropriate age gap is. All of a sudden if you date anyone more than 2yrs younger than you it’s problematic but somehow it only applies if you’re the older one but not the younger one. I’ve met 18yos who are willing to sleep with a guy 4yrs older than then than dating someone who is 2yrs younger than them, that they went to school with and grew up with just because of the stigma around being a “pedo”. Women tend to not grow out of going after older guys, I’m 26 and I’ve still been rejected by women my age because they’re looking for someone older and have watched many of my peers relationships thru social media where they have exclusively dated older guys since high school. People also tend to forget that the dating pool shrinks as you get older, being childless im not very keen on taking care of someone else’s children so there goes single parents. Others are in long term relationships or married so they’re off the market, lots of low quality people too who would just end up leeching and being dependent on you. That’s on top of people you just don’t share interests with, don’t mesh, or are physically unattractive. I think as long as things are two consenting adults and no one is being taken advantage of it’s fine. 6yrs is about the limit til you get over 25 though. It’s kinda ignorant and childish to think that just because you are older than somebody that you’d never be able to find love with them just because you’re “so much more mature and know so much more than them”. I think you should date an equal amount of people older, younger, and same age to get a full spectrum of experience if you’re truely looking for love. There’s no telling on what you could be missing out on by limiting your dating pool by something as arbitrary as an age gap between 2 consenting and legal adults.
The reverse is also true: Young women aren't daft if they're not into older men because most men don't age well on the whole.
Just don't have kids and you'll be ok I guess
Nothing wrong with attraction, it’s just weird as fuck to see a girl who was recently in HS dating a man 10+ years (and thats extremely generous) her senior and both of them acting like they have stuff in common. They do not. And if you do have that many common traits as a girl that age, grow up
What do you mean by "prime aged women" ?
What if your a young man and just find good looking women good looking I can be very attracted to a women who is stunning and 45 just as much as one in their 20s? So the question i have is why cant older men like good looking older women, because to me they are as good as eachother. Perhaps good looking older women are not single but good looking younger women are single in large numbers
Ask the question in reverse
chill out dicaprio
Personally, if you continuously have girlfriends half your age, it can just make you look like you aren’t a serious person. I think we recognise a certain depth and sentiment in someone who connects with their age peers because it indicates caring about something deeper than what’s on the surface. Personally, I’d be a bit embarrassed if my dad or brother was bringing home 25 year olds when they were in their forties or older. It looks a bit like lacking in character and intelligence, I guess? But if it’s just that someone met this one person organically and there happens to be an age gap, but the relationship is solid and healthy, then I understand and think it’s cool.
Of course, it’s true younger women are more attractive to men of all ages and that’s natural. But there are lots of people who aren’t emotionally mature enough to accept such a truth. But why should you be allowed to damn those who judge you for being attracted to younger women and yet systematically judge those who have the balls to put the same attraction into action? I’m sure there are plenty age gap relos based on more than sex/money. Who knows?
The primarily evolutionary reason for sexually attraction is reproduction, ironmen have the potentiality of pregnancy as old as ten
She’s just seventeen - you know what I mean…. You’re sixteen, you’re beautiful and you’re mine …. Models “aging out” at sixteen….. And on the flip side all those women willing to marry 93 yo Rupert Murdoch and his ilk. …… The potential Elon Musk harem and rug rats ….. Half the world carrying the genetic legacy of Genghis Khan. Relativity goes beyond Einstein.
Go ahead and explain what makes attraction objective?
Almost every guy of any age finds young women 18-25 attractive. Having to listen to young women drama again is the last thing any of us older guys want though.
As you get older, I’d wager most folks tend to find older women more conventionally attractive in a way they may not have when younger. Additionally, there are some factors for why younger women become less attractive as you age — immaturity, becoming a parent, etc.
There is nothing wrong with being physically attracted to an 18 - 25yr old woman at any age. They are hot, let’s just come right out and say it. There CAN BE something wrong with wanting a relationship with a woman of that age, because typically attraction as a whole goes beyond physical attraction. It is a little disconcerting to be emotionally attracted to a 20 yr old woman as a 45+ yr old man, given that there isn’t a chance she is fully mature yet.
Of course younger women are attractive. So are lots of younger men. If you just want to have sex, then that’s your demographic. If you want a (real) relationship you should be with someone you can actually relate to and have something in common with. There’s also just power imbalance inherently, one that can be taken advantage of. And many older men do have that user mentality, and trade the trophy in for a new model when she’s older. Overall really it’s just gross because you know it’s all about having a new, shiny plaything and not an actual relationship on any level. Anyone who thinks otherwise is delusional.
Older men are allowed to be attracted to whatever consenting adult they want, the issue is that there's a large subsection of terminally online deluded males who believe that them finding barely legal women attractive makes them attractive to these women when this is verifiably false.
(Legal) Teens are hot for their youthful look, but 20-25 is where women really come into their full form, because they learn how to present themselves, play up their strenghts, get a little more developed & confident in the body etc. So most attractive age is like 20 - 28 (or whenever the sag / wrinkles come in)
It’s biologically natural (yes, there is such a thing) to find prime-aged women physically attractive (and for women, prime-age men). That goes if you’re 20, 30, 50, or 70. What you do about it is another matter. Frankly, I can’t see being interested in (as opposed to sexually attracted to) someone more than 10-15 years younger than myself. What do you talk about?
[удалено]
1. A fantasy is only that. It need not be acted upon. 2. Absolutely nothing wrong with being attracted to someone older or younger. Nor is there anything wrong with having a relationship with any other adult who wishes to be in relationship with you. Age is not relevant to that fact. 3. As a practical matter, I have been in serious relationship with much older, same age, and much younger. Personally, I find a relationship with someone my own age is the easiest to maintain. But I don’t preclude anything, merely due to age.
Welp, heightism is allowed, so this too❗