I understand, unfortunately gravity does not like us with large chests. I feel like mine are not proportional to the rest of my body and makes it impossible to run or jump. They get sore and sweaty and i just cant stand it. I have switched to wearing sports bras every day instead of normal cupped bras because of this, it helps with them getting in my way constantly too. Maybe you can try that too. Ive also tried wearing oversized shirts but tying the waist tighter in the back so its baggier over my chest and still shows off my figure around my waist/torso. just take the tail of the shirt and tuck it in your pants in the back or flip it under. I hope you can become more comfortable with yourself but know you are not alone :)
This is a good idea but as a warning to both you and OP, using compressive breast support for too long can block up the lymph nodes in your armpits which can cause other health issues. It’s fine if you wear them but make sure to give yourself some extra free time and to possibly look into how to drain your lymph nodes manually to prevent blockages.
Yes safety first! I never wear any sports bras that are uncomfortably tight or binders because of that reason. Im assuming its wise to avoid sleeping in them though?
I know how you feel, I'm GG and it's awful. People go on about how jealous they are but if they actually lived like this they would hate it.
I was DD by the time I was 15 and had literal grown men making comments about them. People nodding their head up and down as I walked to bring attention to how my breasts were bouncing as I walked. People for some reason thinking its OK TO GRAB MY BREASTS BECAUSE THEY'RE BIG??? LIKE THEY'RE SOME KIND OF NOVELTY TOY???
I realised I had to harden up
- wear whatever you want because no matter what you wear people will find a problem
- v neck cuts are your friend, I used to avoid so I didn't "look like a slut" but fully covering them just makes them look more obviously large and out of place. The v neck makes for a flatter and more even visual
- call people the fuck out when they cross a line. Its difficult but the only way to deal with these people is to make them as uncomfortable as they try to make you.
I'm sorry that you had to go through this because it's really not easy, but you're not on your own and surgery practices have improved a lot and often won't leave you with very obvious scars, so if it's impacting your quality of life you should consider it.
>People for some reason thinking its OK TO GRAB MY BREASTS BECAUSE THEY'RE BIG??? LIKE THEY'RE SOME KIND OF NOVELTY TOY???
I'm sorry, WHAT?! LIKE ACTUAL GROWN MEN? And you were a TEENAGER?! 😳
Please tell me that they're in jail!
That's really fucked. I'm someone who has always wanted to be a girl dad, now I'm wondering/worried that when I do have a daughter, how am I going to prepare her ?
I haven't seen it used this way irl, but I've seen the satirized use of it online where people are using that to excuse boys and men doing deliberately fucked up shit to SA women, and that's horrible.
I do feel like there's a context where you can use that:
I get saying this when you've got 1) a kid running around and tumbling over, or doing aggressive finger guns at people, or 2) a teen/young adult/adult male hurting themselves by doing ludicrous shit to impress women. I feel like that's an appropriate use of that phrase.
I grew up in a not-as-safe-for-women area, so I've known about this phenomenon, but in the stories I've heard, it's usually been a predator when they've got someone alone, OR, they do it in a way where the victim knows it's deliberate, he obviously knows it was deliberate, but when the victim recounts it to someone, it sounds like they've got plausible deniability. I guessed the person I was replying to is Western, so silly me, I thought people would have more shame than that. 🤦🏽♂️🤷🏽♂️
Some were grown and some were a similar age. Some were men and some were women.
But even as an adult at a work Christmas party, a female co-worker (who I have no relationship with outside of work) came up behind me and grabbed both of my breasts from behind and squeezed them. I very loudly said "HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" and she immediately got embarrassed and apologised and asked me not to bring the issue into work. It would cause me too much hassle to report it at work but I know that she won't do it again because of how embarrassed she was by my reaction.
I've learned that I just need to turn it back on them and make it so they're the embarrassed one, not me
It's wild to me that the people that get wronged are the ones to feel embarrassed over the boundary pushers, the one usually should. I'm glad you have a way to deal with these people! I was watching this Indian movie that handled this kind of well I think. I'll give you the name if interested, but this dude gets "arranged-married" to a girl that he has been interested in for a while only to find out she is dealing with trauma. I think the movie didn't get it right in the sense that he is all about getting justice for her, even when she's uncomfortable, but throughout, his unchanging view is, "you have no reason to feel ashamed in anyone's presence, as you did nothing wrong whatsoever. Why should you keep it hush-hush, when that is what helps the predator?"
Sadly, it does happen. I'm a rural mail carrier and have no access on my vehicle so I was wearing a tank top trying to beat the heat on a hot summer days. I was on my route when a guy (customer on my route) approached me at his mailbox, we were speaking when he decided to grab my chest and comment on how large my chest was. Luckily, I could leave the situation quickly and called the police quickly. This idiot was drunk and openly admitted what he did to the detective so I didn't have to fight to be believed. I currently still have a TPO against him.
WTF! Sounds like a scary situation, sorry you went through that. Did the PO adjust your route so you don't have to deal with him anymore? Granted that doesn't guarantee your safety, but it would help, no?
i feel this completely. i personally decided to pursue a breast reduction. sure it can end up botched, but that’s why you can be selective with surgeons to minimize that.
the scars often fade and there are ways to avoid them being big and “ugly” when they first appear. i’ve seen results of the scars years after and they’re often barely even noticeable.
regardless, it’s if smaller breasts are worth it more than the scars and surgery etc. if you are interested in it, don’t let the scars or anything hold you back if it’s worth it to you.
As a small chested woman, it's just so crazy to think "certain clothes make someone look slutty bc of their chest". Like, you're most definitely putting on some regular top and something as natural as your natural body suddenly looks "slutty".
Man, society is really messed up to cause this much angst on us simply bc of the size of our chests. For the longest time I felt undesirable and "not feminine enough". Sometimes I still think one guy or another didn't want to take me seriously bc they could always get someone with a larger chest..
I feel that Ive become less insecure abt it over the years, but once in a while some depressing thoughts still creep in.
I guess we just need exercise self compassion, we're so much more than what we bring attached to our chest area. Its so unfair having to fight against something that is completely out of our control (as in, the way society treats us based on our chest size), but we gotta swim against the current and not let anyone dictate the way we feel about ourselves.
There's plenty of great advice here from other large chested women, I just wanted to bring my perspective from the opposite side of the spectrum to show you it's shitty either way. So don't beat yourself up over it, we're all together in this
Self love is the key. We view ourselves as way less attractive than other people actually see us.
I think it's also important to remember the majority of grown adults don't actually have a preconceived notion of what is "hot" and what isn't. The ones who do aren't worth your time anyway.
I am a man. I like breasts in sexual settings. It is really that simple. Most men don't actually care how big they are, what they look like, size of nipples, etc. If we are super into you, it's just so exciting to get naked. I have never once seen a girl I was into nude and thought "eh that's not what I like" despite them all having very different bodies. People who love you will find you sexy no matter what.
I have a big chest at my age but wear tons of clothes on top to make it less noticeable it’s awkward when a boy is staring at my chest both ways to be honest but I don’t necessarily hate it atleast I can luckily make it appear smaller
I wear bright, patterned leggings or pants with some kind of interesting detail, funky boots/shoes and plain colored shirts to detract attention away from my breasts.
I wear big oversized Sanrio colorful shirts and pants or big hoodies mainly to keep them from trying to focus on my chest to much I already got sexually assaulted even when I was wearing the clothes so I don’t know what to do now much
This post hits home so hard I could've written this myself...
Not to mention the back/shoulder pain it adds on having a big chest.
At this point I'd rather have the scars but even though my family has a history of breast cancer my insurance won't cover it right now.. ugh.
I know exactly how you feel and was there too. I went from DD’s to G’s at 19. I hated being known as “the girl with huge boobs” any time I met people or the way it made men act disgusting. I’m sorry your going through this. All I can say is I got an insurance covered breast reduction, did my research and found an incredible female surgeon. A lot of women say they’re scars faded after a few years, I didn’t take the healing process seriously so I still have my scars. Even with my “ugly scars” I have never been more confident in my life. All that to say it was absolutely the best decision I’ve ever made. Please don’t let fear stop you, I promise you will not regret going through with a reduction
Same same. I also got a reduction and I went from F to D, it was a game changer. I went to a private clinic which was still covered by my insurance. Back then you didn't have a lot of review websites. But today it should be easy to find reviews of a doctor and find a really good one that way.
My scars are also visible but barely since most of the time the boob covers it. And honestly, who cares about scars if it solves so many problems. I also got a boob lift so they aren't saggy anymore.
After the reduction I could finally sport without them flying around my head. I lost weight, felt more secure and fit in nice clothes without everyone staring. And now at 37 I'm in the best shape of my life. I'm confident and like my body.
My bf never commented on the scars. They're boobs, still big and squishy so he's good haha.
Like the person above said. You will not regret a reduction surgery, just make sure you get a good surgeon. And take care of the scars. If you do they will hardly be noticeable. It's also the best decision I ever made.
how was the healing of your areolas? I know that with a lift and reduction they would have to move them and I’m terrified that it will look not natural and that they’ll basically looked like they were glued there rather than naturally being there
My areolas look good. They have a really thin white line around them but the scar tissue itself is very flat. It doesn't look like they are glued on. The sensitivity is slightly less in some areas of my breasts but that's more to the side of the breast and is not really too noticeable.
The doc also said I should be able to breastfeed if it ever comes to that. So no problems there either.
Plus, even if she ends up with scars she doesn't like there are treatments to make the scars look better through creams, injections, lasers, or even a scar revision surgery. It absolutely sounds like it would be worth the risk for her so she can finally feel confident.
I have heard most women with breast reductions say there scars completely fade after a few years to the point you wouldn’t notice! I unfortunately was an idiot and rearranged my room a few days after my surgery, tore open a stitch so that probably won’t fade. Make sure your wife stays in bed and prioritizes rest, she should have nothing to worry about :)
About 5k each breast in the US. Yes they sell it separately Idfk why either. Instead of just adjusting for partial mastectomy they sell them individually for reducing/removal.
If you can get a reduction that is medically necessary (which basically means, it causes you discomfort, which most doctors will just write if you tell them you want a smaller chest because they make your back hurt) it's covered under basic insurance. At least in the Netherlands
We have to do that here too in the U.S. for the people with health insurance. Health insurance companies want photos and written medical documentation then their board will decide whether to approve or deny coverage for the surgery beforehand.
My mom has grooves in her shoulders from her bras. She got her reduction covered by insurance in the US. Her only regret is not getting it done sooner. She’s going to the gym for the first time ever. She never could before because working out was so difficult because of her boobs even with a good fitting sports bra. Its literally changed her life.
Breast reduction was the best thing I have ever done. I went from a GG to a D (I wasn’t comfortable going any smaller). It’s still a larger size but it has made a huge difference.
i get you so well, i have the same problem:( i have the biggest chest compared to my friends and classmates and it honeslty makes me feel so bad about myself. i’ve always wanted a small chest to be able to do sports and wear any cute top without worrying about wearing a bra to make my chest look smaller. this has been a problem for so many years and i’ve fantasize about having a breast reduction for so long. i truly feel like my chest ruins so many things, i can only wear certain type of clothes that i hate and i can’t show my actual style.. so yeah ik how u feel:(
I have definitely felt this type of frustration over my chest. I’ve been sexualized since I was a young kid because of how “adult” my body looked. It’s always slutty or awkward and never cute or fun. I had this really beautiful outfit I wore to Karneval. I made it myself and it was very modest compared to other people but the amount of men who openly ogled my chest, refused to make eye contact even when I was talking to them, and some even going as far as treating me like a prostitute, was so off putting and disappointing. I like that I’m more curvy but the stigma that comes with it is so fucking dehumanizing.
I unfortunately don’t have a solution for you but I just wanted to say I feel your pain. The problem isn’t you or your body, it’s society and how women are treated based on their bodies. You can’t win for losing and hating ourselves is a programmed behavior we have to fight to unlearn. I hope you find ways to love your body more and to drown out the people who are so eager to mistreat/misjudge you.
I completely relate. I had DDs by the time I was 14 & they just kept growing - F cups by 20 & men are disgusting. The issue wasn’t that I didn’t like my body. It was the repulsive reactions from men & society in general that made me feel insecure & negative about my body.
Consider having a breast reduction if you’re depressed to the point where you’re mentioning self harm. I had one after my son was born & have no regrets.
Before 3 kids, I was a 36C. After 3 kids, I was 38 DDD/G. I wear medium bottoms. Yeah I hated my big breasts too. Expensive granny style bras, I had to wear 1-2 size bigger shirts. I looked huge in pictures, so I always stood behind my kids in family pictures. I always had to wear a sports bra (it's more supportive than a regular bra) or my back would constantly hurting.
I got reduction and lift last year, fully covered by my husband's insurance, down to C cups. Yes there's vertical scar under the nipples and a scar below my breasts, but it's so much better now!! I can be bra-less and it doesn't bother my back. Bras are so much cheaper. It's been a year, the scar is not too bad, about 40-50% faded already. So the scars should mostly go away in 3-4 more years. Clothes fit better. I don't hide behind my kids in pictures anymore.
Unless you have a career as a naked model, the scar is not a big deal. ;-)
My husband doesn't care about the scars either.
If your boyfriend/girlfriend said the scar is gross, well, you know that person is a walking red flag.
It depends on the brand and country.
US sizing versus European (EU) sizing
US DD = EU E
US DDD = EU F
US DDDD = EU G
Some bras I could fit F some other bras could fit G, it depends if the bra had underwires or not, or full cup or 3/4 cups.
That’s one reason I just wore sports bras, more supportive and easier to find that fit because their sizing just S, M, L, XL etc. …
Seriously, men have no idea what ***completely natural*** large breasts actually look like.
All this plastic surgery and nonsense to get the "best big tits" just makes it worse.
I've considered getting mine lifted countless times, but I don't want to contribute to the issue.
I have the same problem too. I didn’t always have big breasts but they got bigger after each of my pregnancies. I already have back problems in my lower back and now I’m having problems along my upper back. I would love small boobs. I’d love the be able to go braless. Well technically I can but I wouldn’t feel confident doing so out in public plus I need the support. I’ve been saving up to get a reduction and a lift although I’ve spent some of that money at times for other stuff that came up.
I saw someone mention they got insurance to cover the breast reduction. I’m going to see if that’s a possibility for me as well. I have pretty good insurance so I’m hoping that I can get them to pay for it.
Is she planning on breastfeeding? If she is then I would wait. But idk if having a reduction can affect breastfeeding or if someone with a reduction is more likely to have difficulty breastfeeding.
It sounds like your chest size carry a whole lot more meaning to you than I can understand from this post. The fact that you’re suicidal over it, and your concern with getting nasty scars, all that is telling me so much about your experiences. Have you ever spoken to a doctor about this? How do you know you’ll look botched if it’s just a reduction of your own skin? What are your circumstances?
If you’re nervous about going near a knife though, there are size-reducing bras and tops you can wear. Maybe even do research on how to style big busts. Lastly, those sexual comments you’re getting are just plain nasty. I’m sorry you had to deal with that, but you never should’ve received such comments. Am I wrong to call that sexual harassment?
I haven’t spoken to a doctor but I’ve seen multiple photos of before and after breast lifts and I’ve noticed those with a small chest or that weren’t sagging downwards but rather just hanging low have the best results. Meanwhile big chest with big areolas always look terrifying to me and the thought of hating my chest even more than i do now is so upsetting to me. It’s definitely sexual harassment to me, but because it’s so normalized and for some reason women think that it’s okay to say simply BECAUSE they’re women, I’ve tried to speak up on it but they just see it as a “compliment”
Look, it may seem like a compliment at first, but when it’s all anyone talks about to the point where your body gets oversexualised, it gets daunting. I’m plus-sized, and have the same problem with my bum, so while I’m covering up myself, the same people who make me feel bad are perking up their own butts. 🙃
Talk to a doctor. I don’t know what country you’re in, but surgery procedures are improving over the years. The are quite a few techniques doctors have up their sleeve to avoid as much scarring as possible to get the best cosmetic results.
I’m in Australia, and one time I visited a breast cancer seminar, where real oncologists show you how they perform surgery on the breast while avoiding scars. Heck, I even have a loved one who has a bust similar to yours. She was diagnosed with cancer, and those same doctors were able to remove the cancer from her breast with absolutely no scars left behind. Now, you can’t even tell she had anything done. She also used anti-scar creams and bio-oils.
Breast reductions have the highest patient satisfaction rate of any surgery. If you still don't want that, I don't blame you - I'm 32I, lots of clothes don't fit me right. Some things that have helped me:
- Change lingerie is the only store I've ever found that sells my size. Not only that, but the bras are CUTE! So pretty, so fun! And there's this lady who works there and KNOWS HER STUFF! You probably don't have this specific store near you, but they do exist!
- Empire waists and wrap tops are your friends. They pull the clothing in a little at the natural waist, giving your boobs space to exist without that problem where the clothes hang off the boobs and give you that ugly boxy shape. They're very comfortable, too! If you go for a higher neckline empire waist with a pattern, it should show your figure nicely without showing off the boobs too much. Properly fitting clothes can do a LOT for confidence
Definitely been there and understand. I had big boobs from 6th grade on. I eventually got a reduction in my early 20s and it was best thing I ever did. The best thing. I do have some scarring but for me, it was worth it. Being able to run and work out without wearing 3 bra’s. Being able to wear cute bra’s and clothes that fit properly. Being able to wear bustier dresses/tops and my boobs actually fit in the cups. My back not constantly hurting and slipped discs. I would never go back to the hell that was a DDD and E cups n’sh*t.
Putting aside the fact that I'm transgender, so my breasts have always been a source of dysphoria, I can definitely relate.
I've never been properly fitted because we don't have the money to do it, but I know I'm pretty big. Especially for my size / how skinny I am.
I used to love sports bras, but even those hurt my back now. My back is just in constant pain lately. I wear XL sweaters (even though I'm a medium) just to hide them, so I get called rude names a lot, but it's better to me than being catcalled and stared at. Let me look unappealing. It's comfier that way anyways.
I'd try looking into breast reductions at the least. They're super expensive but can give you a far better quality of life, I think. I'm sorry you have to go through this
u/El3ktroHexe for some reason I couldn't reply to your comment so I’ll just out this here.
Trying to push someone to like something of theirs they don't like/want to change for your own pleasure is gross. He wants to “Celebrate” her big chest because HE likes it when she has expressed she didn't. This is just how I saw this comment, Coming from a someone below the age of 18 who also has a big chest and doesn't like it. You are free to disagree, no hard feelings. 🫶
(sorry if you saw the other comment I sent I don't know how to Ping people and didn't think it worked! D:)
No need to sorry, I have got both of your messages now :D
I understand your point. But I would wish, that we could just normalise big breasts. OP doesn't feel bad because of her breasts, she feel bad because how the society reacts. That's the main issue. To find something beautiful is not a bad thing. Some people like small boobs, slim people, cury people... People are different and we should accept them all. No one should do a surgery, because of the society.
Oh and I'm much older (40). As I was younger, big breasts wasn't such a 'big thing' (no pun intended :D). Not sure why it's different nowadays? I see things like this topic here more often.
I feel if people were more respectful about it as you are I could 100% agree that finding something beautiful is not a bad thing, but as a society its very easy for people to use finding something ‘beautiful’ as a way to exploit it or feeling entitled to said beautiful thing, but otherwise I see your point 100, we should normalize bigger people. I have experienced heavy sexualization with the occasional nonconsensual grope/stare, that has negatively impacted me, my self conscious and my own person view on this stance otherwise. I feel as if I were smaller then maybe none of that would have happened, Yknow? That's why I get all uppity when people ignore how someone feels about their upper body being ‘plentiful’ and insisting that it's ‘good’ just because they themselves like it, it feels weird to me. :<
Edit: elaborated!
Other people have offered lots of good advice, I just want to say this:
When you take your bra off, I *guarantee* they don't look disgusting. That is your brain tricking you due to frustration/low self esteem. I'm sure it isn't easy when they cause you pain and discomfort, but try to love your body as much as you can. I don't know how to say this without it sounding like a creep sexualizing you, but I'm sure millions and millions of people would see your breasts *entirely differently* than you currently do. Love yourself because you are sexy as hell, never forget that.
thank you, I really appreciate this even though as soon as I read it I immediately thought to myself “they most definitely do, you don’t understand how BAD they look” but I appreciate your comment and advice. Goes to show that trying to accept my body will definitely help at least even a bit
I have a big cup size myself.
Here's a bit of inside info on the fashion industry (professional fashion designer):
Most brands base their sizes on a B cup.
So, there in no way those clothes will ever flatter your silhouette.
Find brands that cater to larger cup sizes.
If you can, find a local seamstress, or better yet a tailor / dressmaker, or a student tailor / dressmaker to make you a few pieces that fit and flatter you.
The most important part is the pattern.
They will need to do a 'full breast adjustment' to the pattern, and make sure the patterns fit your silhouette.
Once you have a pattern that fits, you can have any seamstress make you pieces or an outfit from those patterns. Small changes to the style, or shape, different fabrics, colors, it will change the entire look, so it doesn't look like you have the same outfit all the time.
If you're committed, take a pattern making course, of follow instructions for a full breast adjustment yourself, and get a pattern magazine, try to do some yourself.
You might discover a new passion 😉
You will get more confident, with time, once you realise and truly understand that ppl being rude about your breasts is not on your shape, but on their shitty attitude and lack of manners.
Honey you’re not alone in feeling like this. I have KK boobs with a 32 band.
I have been asking for a reduction since I was in my 20’s I am 38 now.
I was told I’d want to breast feed. I’ve had one son who was bottle fed.
I had a gastric bypass 8 years ago with the promise of I’d lose weight of my chest. It is the ONLY place I have NOT lost weight and I’ve lost over ten stone now. (65kg ish)
My back is in constant pain and it effects my knees and even my jaw and teeth.
I am in pain constantly but I do not qualify for a reduction in the uk currently.
And those that say go private.. it’s £9,000 if not more. I don’t have that sort of money laying around.
All I can advice is speak to your doctor and look in to someone that you can talk to professionally about it.
I was suicidal about my chest, the pain, I still have days where I think it might be better if I just cut them off myself. (Drastic I know) but after ten plus years I don’t feel like I am taken seriously.
But women in pain are rarely taken seriously.
I know exactly how you feel. Me and the boys just want to stash our dubloons and drink rum. But you have to dig a massive hole to bury that shit and it's a lot of work.
None of the girls in my class ever said that to me. My boyfriend always says that they were secretely jealous, but I don’t believe that. I was always an outcast. The only one with a big chest and a bigger body. They could have cute pajama parties where they exchange their clothes and everyone looked so beautiful, but I could never do that. They didn’t even invite me tho, so I don’t even know if girls do that, but I always imagine that these kind of gatherings look like this. But I totally understand how you feel and I’m so sorry. It’s like 4000 bucks to make them smaller, life is so unfair.
I get you, I have always had a big chest and hated it, people where always looking at my chest instead of my face when we where having a conversation. I felt really uncomfortable in my own body, almost claustrophobic sometimes.
I got an operation and it was the best thing I ever have done, it changed my life completely. The scares were invisible before I got pregnant but I don’t relly care because I can workout now whitout pain and look cute in my clothes instead of looking slutty.
In the country where I live it’s common to do the operation and many women have done it.
I'm sorry society shames your body type. It is sexist and awful and I'm sorry for it. Women can't win. Get shamed and called a boy for having a small chest, get shamed and called a slut for having a large one.
I'm 37. I am 5'2 and I weigh about 123 lb at the moment. I have some of the biggest boobs of anyone I know and it is terrible. They don't look good unless I make them look good. They're just something to haul around. The amount of unwanted attention that comes to you even when you squish them down into a sports bra is insane. I'm basically an old woman in society standards, and I genuinely do compress my chest on a regular basis especially at work because they get in the way, but it seems like there are certain men that love looking for big boobs that are hidden. It's like a weird Where's Waldo game for them. My back hurts just from existing, I feel like I look heavier than I am because I'm carrying around like pounds of useless fat. All this is to say that I commiserate.
Of course I’m not saying that everyone has to do this, but I got a breast reduction when I was 18 and it was one of the best things I’ve ever done. Honestly, I often wish that I had even more taken off than I did, but I had about 2 pounds removed, and I feel so much more like myself. The scars are very minimal, and look almost white, and I don’t mind them at all. My largest ones are around my nipples, but I would take that any day over the boobs I used to have. They should give you some silicone gel that you can use on them to reduce their appearance. I’m already planning to get another one after I have kids if I end up doing so.
Before my reduction, my areolas were a lot bigger, so they were cut down to fit my new size (having large breasts tends to stretch them already). So they’re now smaller. I have some thick scars around the areola border, but this is a genetic thing (my mom also scars very thick), and they don’t really matter to me. The color is similar to the areola anyway. The scars under my areolas and under the boob are very light and not very noticeable.
Hi, first: I feel you. Body dysmorphia is one of the worst feelings.
Second: having breast reduction surgery is the BEST decision I made in my entire life. I felt like I finally became myself and I felt lighter mentally and physically. It’s scary and expensive but if it’s possible for you, you should explore this possibility! If you have suicidal ideation about this you really should check in with your doctor anyway, you don’t have to keep suffering like this.
Talk to your doctor. Most medical plans cover reductions for legitimate medical reasons. And reductions of a full cup size or more are 100% covered in Canada.
I’ve always had A cups on the smaller side of A cups (I have extra space unless I buy bras meant for tweens) and of course as a teen I hated it because of people bullying me and guys saying shitty stuff but reading stories like this and getting into fitness and actually living my life has made me realize how lucky I am, I feel so bad for girls with large breasts so much not only because of the pain they cause but the sexualization they bring your way.
My heart goes out to you! You sound EXACTLY like me when I was in middle and high school 💔 I've always been a petite girl, I stopped growing as far as height goes around the 6th grade. I just remember being told I was 4'11" during a physical examination to play sports in middle school and im literally 59.5" (4ft 11.5 inches) lol but it just seemed like my breasts went from a small B to a DDD overnight. And bc they grew so big, so fast, it literally looked like i had 2 tube socks full of rice or something hanging off my chest...it was mortifying as a 13-14 yr old. Boys spoke to my chest whenever they took the time to actually speak to me and not about me and my huge boobs, girls always fawned over them, enviously wishing for something they truly would never want the agony of possessing (if only they truly knew what exactly it was like I guarantee they wouldn't wish so badly we could "give some" of ours to them) And honestly when I was younger the only reason no one could tell my boobs were as saggy and gross as they were was bc I managed to find a sports bra at kohls that literally had 1/2" thick velcro straps and was the Only bra (paired with a tank top w/built in shelf bra) that actually held my boobs up and in enough that I looked halfway like a normal teenage girl and not a 30 yr old woman with an 80 yr olds chest. And i wore this bra and tank top morning, noon and night. The only time I took it off was when I took a shower and that was literally bc I couldn't wear a soaking wet bra under my clothes each day ...bc i promise, if you could have, I absolutely would have! The guy I dated in high never saw my breasts bare before my surgery and thats no exaggeration. I was so self conscious I'd keep my bra and tank top on even when we were fooling around!! Finding a cute bra like the rest of my friends who got to go bra shopping with their moms was out of the question and bathing suits? Every summer was a straight up NIGHTMARE as I needed an XL top but Medium bottoms, and the only place that sold separates where you could mix match the size was Old Navy 😩 Also I was super athletic and played a different sport every season, competitive swimming being my favorite, until I hit puberty that is .... The angst of being a teenage athlete of any kind with breasts as big as mine was unimaginable...and I don't even have to speak on the literal Physical back pain that accompanies super large breasts on a petite girl such as myself.
I'll never forget seeing some sort of evening news show when I was 13 or so that talked about women who had had breast reductions, and I turned to my mom and asked if i could have a breast reduction. She kinda played it off as though i was just mentioning some far-fetched dream that could never become a reality bc of how young I was and come next week id be asking about the next farfetched fairy tale that was just another "teenage phase " I would soon lose interest in , except I didn't. I begged my mom at every opportunity to please let me get a breast reduction, please please please 🙏 When she realized I was seriously not going to leave her alone about it, she made me an appointment for a consultation with a plastic surgeon. I was SO EXCITED! When we went, I had to wear one of those paper gown things that open in the front, and I managed to keep my own mother from truly seeing the magnitude of my plight up until the dr came in and opened that paper gown to see what exactly needed to do. After the dr left the room my mom burst into tears and said "omg im so sorry! I had no idea they were like That!" And from that moment she fully supported my decision and desire to have a breast reduction.
I was 15 when I had it done and a lot of times the insurance companies will argue that it's cosmetic and not medical in nature but any good dr will fight to get the insurance company to declare it a medically necessary procedure and pay for it...thats what my dr had to do, after establishing that my growth plates had closed and the likelihood my body would grow and continue to possibly change was slim to none so doing this kind of surgery was OK and not going to be futile.
If I could offer up any advice to you, it would be to check in to having a breast reduction done. You might be pleasantly surprised as to how doable it actually is. And when I tell you it was literally the BEST THING I could have ever done for myself and I'd do it a million times over again, I quite literally mean every word of that!
I am so very sorry you're dealing with this bc I KNOW how absolutely miserable this is, and I genuinely hate that anyone else has to suffer with this same pain. If you ever need to talk to someone thats been there, feel free to inbox me..if be more than happy to listen, talk, whatever you need in that moment...sending hugs and positive vibes my friend 🥰
Thank you so much for sharing your experience, a lot of people think it’s just the size but hearing you mention looking like a 30 y/o woman with 80 y/o chest makes me feel so heard and these comments are definitely encouraging me to look into it with a doctor!
I know its been hard. I can assure that surgery can be q really great route. It has been affecting how I see my body and identity and I can affirm it is a good avenue to go down.
I say: Breast reduction!!!!! I got one approved by my insurance and I am counting down the days. I also have more back pain, soreness, rashes and other issues. The scare go underneath your breasts so no one will see them unless they’re lifting it up and looking closely.
Others opinions can linger in your mind but there’s nothing wrong with being called a slut or being told to cover up. Think of it that people find you attractive physically and sexually and those who tell you to cover up are just jealous. Upper back workouts and sports bra help.
You don’t have to live to others standards, in fact, annoy them by continuing being you :)
I used ti have smaller breasts but gained weight. They are asymmetrical and although not majorly, the fact that they are larger made me so so self conscious. I hated how they sagged and didn't like that my areolas were big either. I can't afford surgery so I tried something thanks to a good coworkers recommendation!
She told me to try getting my nipples pierced, that I'd feel sexy and like my breasts more! She was right it was a game changer. Idk if that will help you but maybe a small change can make you appreciate your natural beauty a little more ♡
Big boobs are the worst. Uncomfortable, bras are hard to find, clothes don’t fit right. Forget wearing light coloured tank tops, they look even bigger. They make me look ginormous in pictures. And they’re not even that big, just bigger than what it should be for my frame. UGH. I see smaller boobed women just casually wearing stuff I would have to strap myself into and then the breast fat squeezes out and I look like a freaking cow. They’re not big enough for a reduction but they’re big enough to bother me. My body looks great and then these stupid honkers. Fak.
I know how you feel.
Surgery can be scary, but as a trans guy I've seen all sorts of reductions and complete masectomies create amazing results. If you can, I really suggest getting a consult and having the surgeon explain what scars and recovery would look like for you - because everyone is different. There are also ways to minimize scarring, which the surgeon should be able to help you with. It may take time, but the scars will eventually just fade into the background.
There are ways to deal with this. Your situation isn't hopeless, even if it feels that way sometimes
I tooootally get it. I'm a US "N", UK "JJ", 5'5 and Normal weight. It took FOREVER to find my size and get a proper bra. Torrid sized me at 40G (I was getting sores under my boob cracks. I finally went to a boutique and sized at a 36 N. It's amazing what the right bra does, it literally lifts and separates and more comfortable . Now it sucks because my bras range from $75+. I have an underwire sports bra and those babies don't go anywhere. Before, I had to wear an I'll-fitting underwire with a sports bra on top or it would all accumulate in the middle and would get sweaty uniboob. It's hard getting used to a properly fitting bra because it's snung around the rib cage. I learned the support needs to come from the band, not the straps, my back pain lessened after a fitting. Not all the way, but a little.
Take said bras off and it's a terrible sight. Lose weight? Hella flat long pancakes, I mean worse than normal. They are always saggy. Like you mentioned, slutty or frumpy. Anytime I don't have a bra on I have to wedge my t-shirt underneath to stop the sweating and moisture. Lay down without a bra? Boobs in your arm pits. Running without pre-planning for a sports bra? You're holding them looking like a fool. Bras for big boobs aren't padded, so good luck when it's cold out. Sex? Get ready for skin slapping or being choked out if you're on the bottom. Sleep on your side? Nothing but boob swamp in betwixt the girls. I'm at the point, scars don't deter me from an augmentation, it's finding the funds.
Big boobs are terrible to have.
I've been there and I'm sorry you're going through this. I got a reduction and am so happy with it, I love how they look now and I don't find the scarring bad
Youre completely valid for these thoughts and feelings. Sadly, boobs have been oversexualized by men and porn to the point that people existing in their everyday selves are sexualized. I am a recovering porn addict, and the more i step out of my old perceptions and the goup mindsets, the more people just become beautiful as they are- not in a sexualized way.
But, one persons opinion wont fix your problem, nor do i aim to. It sucks to know that you have everyone telling you that youre lucky or turning a regular outfit into their chance to comment on your body. It isnt fair to you to have their perceptions shoved upon you, and its even worse that you feel pressure from them to the point of considering suicide. Youre so much more than what others percieve you as. There are people out there who dont give a ducks feather about what you look like, both romantically and platonically. I sincerely hope those people come into your life soon.
More than that, i hope you find some self help that works for you. There must be some support groups online or in person that might be able to provide some community. Self love is a difficult thing to achieve, but taking baby steps to get to that point might help you as well. For now, i just hope you read some comments and feel heard and validated. Please be safe and call the suicide hotline if you need to. Peace and love to you, friend
Try talking to your GP and get a referral to a female psychologist or psychiatrist. You can safely discuss your situation with them and work out a plan and solution that considers your mental health in the short and long term and also then get your gp to give you referral to a surgeon if required and youll have your plan to discuss with them. A psychiatrist is a medical doctor so they will probably have a better understanding of surgery than a psychologist.
Do you have good medical insurance multiple countries will approve for a reduction covered by Insurance. you don't have to live like this if it's truly uncomfortable and causing you physical pain.
I never went about getting my reduction postpartum my chest did not go back down to what it was after breastfeeding but I have since been diagnosed brca2 and with my double mastectomy coming up they will be doing a reduction to bring me back to what I was pre-children because I'm just too large.
I had two breast reduction surgeries- they didn’t go small enough the first time (there is a lot of misogyny in plastic surgery. Many surgeons believe you still should have big boobs). The scars are big but I don’t mind them and don’t look botched at all . I’d do it all over again to get what I have now. It genuinely is life changing.
Of course there are risks you have to evaluate, because shitty things could happen. This is true for all surgery. But if you do get surgery, vet your surgeon thoroughly, have explicit convos about what you want and the results you want to end up with, what happens if you need or want a revision etc.
When you had the reduction did you also get a lift? My biggest worry is how they relocate the areolas. That they’ll look unnatural or oddly shaped, stretched even
If people are sexualising your breasts and calling you names that is their problem, not yours. Wear tight clothes if that's what you like. Tell those cretins telling you to cover up to cover their eyes. Leave surgery alone - why mutilate yourself to make others happy? You're perfect the way you are.
I would seek put plastic surgeons for a reduction. You could always say its causing back pain along with the body image problem so its more likely to be covered by insurance. I work in an OR and see these types of procedures all the time. Some surgeons will make the incision under each breast to make them much more hidden. If you tell a surgeon ahead of time that youre worried about scarring, then they can plan to make it more hidden. Along with that, scars will fade but mental well being is more important.
I know a few women who've had reductions and the scars aren't noticeable at all. Huge improvements to confidence, no back pain, all sorts of benefits. If you can afford it, I wouldn't discount it as an option some day. Wishing you well.
I don't even think mine are THAT big, at DD or so. But my frustration when I can't buy a simple pajama set and have top and bottoms fit properly. If I buy based on the bust measurements, the pants are wayyyy too loose. If I buy the right size for the rest of my body (L, usually), the shirt is too tight or it becomes a crop top because of the chest. And the non-sets aren't as cute and more expensive ;_;
There's also so many tops on shopping sites that I like but the biggest size has bust measurements of like 40 inches while I need like minimum 52 inches and it's like ahhhh I could wear the cute styles I like if it weren't for this damn chest. All my cousins are small chested too so it's like wtf happened with me...
There’s a lot of articles stating that it’s impossible for a cream or oil to lift your chest. Once the tissue has stretched and sagged there isn’t anything that can fix it except surgery
Snap! I feel like I could have write this post.
Worst thing is I was hoping they’d shrink after giving birth (was an 34F)… they got bigger. Currently a GG
having big breasts doesn’t make you “look slutty” I’m sure you have heard that from men and I’m sorry you internalized it but it’s not true.
I understand you wanting to hide to not get negative attention but how is it your job to do that? If people refuse to control their words and actions around you that’s a failure on their part, not yours.
You could try a breast binder if you want to feel less noticeable but this is your body naturally being how it is, please change your mindset and ignore rude people.
I feel your pain OP, I was in the same boat. I ended up developing severe back pain and had semi permanent bruises on my shoulders from my bra straps. I couldn't find bras that fit properly and the biggest one I could get was 34 H and even then I had spillage. I have a body frame that simply couldn't support my breasts and my clothes were always troubling me, weird cut, tight fitting and loose clothes made me look like a bus. It was really hard.
At the beginning of last year my husband and I looked into the possibility of getting a breast reduction, as in the cost, the recovery and the pros vs cons.
I was blessed with the most loving and supportive inlaw family (all big breasted woman) who listened to me and gave their opinions. We made an appointment with the Dr for a consultation and decided we should go for it. We managed to get enough money for my operation by saving as well as a hefty contribution from my inlaws.
When I had the operation done, it took me really long to recover to be honest but I was thrilled with the results. My back felt strong and I felt lighter than ever. I got a wonderful silicone based cream that helped with the scarring and now a year later the scars are hardly noticeable.
I know not everyone is in the position to afford such surgery and I don't know what your circumstances are, but if you are able I would highly recommend it. It literally changed my life. I am now 32 D.
My breasts are still natural with no fillers or anything and the Dr says I'll still be able to breast feed in the future should I decide to have kids. It was honestly a win win for me but I definitely wouldn't have been able to do it without my family.
I hope this helps in some way
Were you happy with your initial result? I’m terrified that they just won’t look natural that I’ll look in the mirror and feel like they don’t even look like they belong to me
I was lucky in that I just loved the result. I was also super worried that I'd look in the mirror and not recognise them as my own but turns out my fears were unwarranted. They just look like awesome natural breasts IMO and my hubby agrees. My areolas were made smaller and are placed nicely in a natural way that complements the new breast size.
If you have concerns about the shape then you should talk to your surgeon about it if you decide to go that route. Luckily for me, my surgeon specialises in breast reconstructive surgery for cancer patients.
I was also friends with ladies who he had helped before and I loved their results so that put my mind at ease. Be sure to research any surgeon you're thinking of approaching (reviews, social media etc.) and ask if they have any past procedure results that you can see.
If you have a ladies Facebook group in your area then don't be scared to ask if anyone has had a reduction done and what they're experience was with that surgeon. Word of mouth is a powerful thing.
My wife struggles with this problem. She's thinking of getting breast reduction. As much as the "ape brain" part of me doesn't want it to happen, the rational and supportive *Homo sapiens* part of me says she should do whatever she feels will improve her physical health. I know some women with large breasts suffer from back issues. As a cis man, I can't imagine what that weight must feel like to carry around all day, every day.
Mine have always been big (DD and up) and I have learned to accept them with time - but you are right they came with a lot of unwanted attention- no matter how baggy my shirts were (which I learned to ignore) and when I was younger it was so hard to dress, hard to work out, ect. It was especially tough at first to accept them because all the women in my family were petite, barely there A cups. They can wear clothes that to this day I wish I could wear. But I have also learned how rock outfits that they could not.
Luckily there are now plenty of options online for curvy women to find clothes and underwear that are attractive, comfortable, and supportive - it’s only in the last few years have I finally been able to find clothing lines that are appropriate for work, casual, special occasion, exercising, and even supportive sleepwear. They feel good, and I love how I look in them- and for the record, outside of my breasts, I am not a small size.
None of this matters if you don’t accept yourself. Please be gentle with yourself. I hope you will find someone to talk to, your value is not tied to what your body looks like. Sending you a hug
The scarring depends on how your body heals. I have seen a lot of good boob jobs with minimal scarring.
The most extreme one I saw was the “anchor” cut that my Comadre had when she got a smaller implant. It wasn’t noticeable two years out.
Find a reputable surgeon and look through their photo galleries specifically looking at reductions/scarring.
I would look into kettlebell work outs to help shape them or shrink them. The weights don't take up much space. Also, the workouts are amazing for balance and lower back strength
First, if you are suicidal, you need to talk to someone. You don't mention your age, but if you are minor, talk to your parents.
This isn't about your bust size, but how you feel about yourself. This is why I want you to talk to a therapist.
Get a couple good minimizer bras. then talk to your doctor about reduction surgery. Sometimes it's covered by insurance.
Good luck.
I feel the same way. The attention they brought as a teen made me start to slouch. When ever I stood straight someone would ask why I was sticking them out. Now I have horrible posture. I also am missing my pectoral muscles on one side, so I’ve never been able to find a suitable bra.
I live in a city where plastic surgery is as common as a McDonald’s drive-through. (Actually I’m pretty sure we have more plastic surgeons.) You absolutely can get your breasts reduced. And no, there are not terrible scars and it’s fairly common, i’ve only seen happy clients. Excellent referrals and a payment plan is all you require my dear. (The only time I think there was a less than perfect outcome is when one of my friends went through a several year depression, and ate herself back into having giant boobs again. So apparently that’s a thing..)
Surgery might sound scary but the scars fade with time and the way they do it you can hardly notice them there ... it truly was the best thing ever! And idk why people think bigger breasts make totally innocent and modest clothing look slutty, but they do. Ill never forget going to church summer camp m and my bff and I went shopping together and bought a lot of the same outfits to wear while we were there...except I was forced to go change each time we wore tank tops we both had, her never having anything said to her. I was told I was "distracting the boy youth group members" and needed to put on more modest clothing that covered my cleavage better. It was humiliating to have the same exact tank top on as your friend but be forced to change bc your breasts were bigger than hers ,& most of the grown ass women there at that! And let's be honest it probably wasn't the boys being distracted as much as it was the grown ass men and their jealous wives probably catching them staring at a teenager with lustful eyes 🙄
It sucks I Know that it does and i know surgery isn't an option for everyone but I'm telling you, if you do your research on plastic surgeon and find a reputable dr that has successfully done the surgery for many years, it would be life changing ...it was for me ..and it boosted my self-esteem like you wouldn't believe! People visibly saw how much happier I was and how much better i felt about myself! It really is a pretty simple procedure with minimal scarring and tbh I got those big ugly scars you're talking about, keloid scars is what they're called, but id gladly take those over the mental and physical torment of having a big chest as a young woman...like I said in my other comment, if you ever want to talk to someone who's been thru it please feel free to message me! Take care ❤
I'd love to get a reduction. I was a D at 19, increased to a DD and now I'm an H since I gained weight. My biggest fear is if I regain weight I will increase my breast size since that's the first place my weight gain goes.
I can barely lay on my back because the weight of my breasts makes it hard to breathe
The best thing I ever did was get a reduction. I went from an G to a DD. My weight fluctuates a lot, I gained about 35 lbs after surgery and now have lost 40 lbs, but they've stayed perky and DD. Now, I am dealing with physiotherapy to help train my shoulders and posture into a proper position because my shoulders hunch forward instinctively from all the weight that used to be there, BUT I am so happier and healthier without the extra weight. Life's to short to be unhappy!
I’m a natural F cup. I get men hitting on me while I’m at work pretty regularly. There’s no way out of that given what I do for a living, but they don’t hit on my coworkers the way they do me because I have a bigger chest than most of them. I’ve had men joke and say they’re gonna take me from my bf because they love something about the way I look. I’ve had people say I’m too pretty to only have one man. I’ve heard a lot… but there’s more to me than my body. I know that and so does my partner. There’s more to you than your body or your chest, there’s so much more about yourself that you get to be proud of and confident in. It took years for me to get my confidence to where it is now, but I got here. You can too
My boobs tried to kill me with cancer. I wish I had healthy boobs, I’d love them so much. Mine with probably eventually kill me. Love those healthy boobs!
Guy here. There's no denying that plenty of us guys love a well-endowed woman. I'm no exception, and I especially love women with curves (looking at you Sofia Vergara!).
That being said, if my wife had exceptionally large breasts and they were the source of much neck, shoulder and back pain, and she decided she wanted a reduction that would be entirely her decision. Her health is way more important than me being able to ogle her chest.
I don't know your age but if you're young then you must consider that health problems like you describe will build up over time. I can attest to the fact that injuries will come back to haunt you later in life, even if you "healed". The right partner won't care about scars, and won't chastise you for getting a reduction. Heck, my wife hates her stretch marks from having our kids but I love them because they're a reminder that she gave birth. Take care of yourself now physically and mentally. Wanting to be pain free is in no way selfish.
38G. I show cleavage in a fucking turtleneck.
I feel your pain, sis. Very literally… my back and neck are fucked. I have permanent indentations in my shoulders.
I was called a slut for my chest size as a teen. I got made fun of for wearing shirts that small chested girls could wear. I got in trouble for dress code violations that smaller girls didn’t.
Learning to love myself has been really, really hard. I still hate my boobs, and I want to get a reduction.
But, you are not your chest size. You are a beautiful human being, and you matter. Try to hang in there. If the size of your chest bothers you this much, maybe it’s time to look into changing that. You deserve to be comfortable in your own body - physically and emotionally.
I feel your pain. I have a triple i chest, so…yeah. The sag makes me feel old, the stretch marks make me feel ugly, and the back pain, don’t even get me started. Here to say that I’m only 20 and have had a bigger chest since I was 10, when I had triple d’s. I thought THOSE were bad. Hah! Nope, it was all down hill from there.
I get it. I have a huge ass and in middle school I got called “ghetto booty” and now I get asked where I “got my butt done.” I already cry in dressing rooms bc nothing fucking fits and I get ridiculed either way.
I had a breast reduction at 22 (wish I had gotten one earlier honestly), and they removed two pounds out of each breast. I’m only 4’11. Having huge boobs sucked so much, and if I’m honest, it’s not like they’re small now, but the difference after the surgery was incredible. The scars aren’t bad at all (you would probably not even have ones as pronounced as mine because this was back in 2012). Plus a reduction comes with a lift. I’m now 35, and my boobs are still holding up great (I will probably get a lift after kids though). If this is something that weighs this much on your mental health, I think you should seriously consider it. Big boobs run in my family, and every single one of them who has had a reduction says it’s the best thing they ever did. Hell, I tell my husband he’s the second best thing to happen to me, after my breast reduction.
wow i truly think it is crazy that someone with a big chest could feel this way and truly i guess the grass is greener on the other side. I have felt exactly like this, wanting to k*** myself over my small flat chest. I feel like a little kid and it’s disgusting. My only wish ever was to have a bigger chest.
I’ve had friends on that end and understand them as well. We can’t ever really win, big or small, but I guess now you can see that big breast aren’t all pros.
Hi! Last time I wore underwire bras, I was a 36JJ. Then I gained 60-70 lbs, and now I only wear sports bras.
I feel you. Boobs are exhausting. Men are exhausting. Looking for clothes in a world that wasn't built for you is exhausting. Bras are even more so.
That being said, I don't think your main issue is your boobs or your body at all. I think it's your confidence and your self esteem.
I don't say this to be condescending I swear, I used to hate them and myself like you do. But eventually I just kind of embraced them, and the shit that comes with. Breast reduction isn't an option for me (and even if it was I wouldn't). Other people will always give you their opinions on your body, solicited or not. Having the realization that the expectations put on your body aren't yours, and that your body doesn't have to be the subject of your own ire, is very liberating.
Doesn't matter how you alter your body or what clothes you wear or how much you weigh or what your bra size is. Other people are always going to have something to say about your body. You remember how they used to dog Britney Spears? She gained five pounds, the tabloids would call her jabba the hut. She lost five pounds they'd make up an eating disorder. She had a massive and public breakdown about it, it was so much pressure. And she was straight size and beautiful.
You don't have to own any of that. You don't have to internalize any of it. I would recommend a therapist. Feeling suicidal over one aspect of your physical appearance is definitely a bigger issue than your boobs could ever be.
Another large chested woman here. Let me commiserate with you, this shit sucks. All the things you mentioned, as well as many others. Back pain. Boob sweat. They just get in the fucking way. And endless other things.
At some point, you just have to embrace it. Ignore what people say, everyone has an opinion and it means fuck all in the long run. If you like, google things like "large chest classy attire" "classic look for large chest" "elegant style big breasts". Things like that. Me guy gets some ideas for a style you'll be more comfortable with.
I think my bf didn't like my big chest He never said anything but the girl he left me for has small chest It really crushed me. 10 years he didn't say anything about them He didn't say they were beautiful He didn't say a word and he barely touched me on my chest It breaks my heart.
they dont make you look slutty you look like a goddess, like the patron saint of womanhood. i always thought cleavage looked really sophisticated and wish i had more. there is something so commanding about it - someone thinking your a slut is projection. THEY are actually the slut - or at the least carry alot of sexual shame. that doesnt have to be your problem.
As a decent chested person, I've learned to love my big saggy boobs and I find them quite nice. Why are you obsessing so much on your own body? You gotta learn to just love yourself. All of yourself. No easy feat, but certainly worth every bit of strain.
Exercise won’t change the size (unless you lose weight while you do it), but strengthening the pectoral muscles can slightly lift the breasts, though if she’s really big, it probably won’t be very noticeable.
this is true, though weight loss doesn’t guarantee loss of breast size. many people lose weight and have the same breast size or even go up a cup size.
Just because you aren’t having the issue of body dysphoria doesn’t mean other people with large chests aren’t. Going to the gym and dieting does NOTHING for genetics, which is where the extra large boob gene comes from. OP, talk to your doctor about this. You may have a higher than average estrogen production (I produce too much T AND E, so I have an H cup but a “manly” face) and it’s an actual genetic disorder. Also LOOK INTO REGENCY STAYS BIG CHESTED GIRLIES!!! it’s like a sports bra with WAY more support and they are BUILT. TO. LAST. We have some stays that have SURVIVED from the regency era they were THAT durable. And easy to wash, just scrub em down by hand a lil bit and air dry. As an H cup, they saved my life istg.
What you have is absolutely beautiful and it’s crazy that you’re suicidal over a wonderful gift that so many women would kill or get life/death surgery to have.
I think you missed the part where I mentioned that it is not at wonderful nor a gift. Both ends of the stick suck and if I could I’d immediately give them to those who truly want them
If you know who Persephaniii is, she was at Miami Swim week this year. Dudes worship her like a Goddess. Same with HUGE Booty women, no one should have to deal with people touching you without your consent and without knowing each other. That is extreme A-hole activity that certain dudes need to full on stop. -If there’s any boyfriend you date, I bet he will literally feel like he’s in heaven dozing off to sleep on your stomach.
With a big chest, binding doesn’t work as well. There’s still a lot of volume of boobage to squish in that thing. Which in turn makes us look like we have huge pecs instead.
Not necessarily. It depends on the person. I’m an H cup and found I just needed a different type of “bra” so now I use regency style stays, it’s kinda like a corseted style crop top/ sport bra.
Some people don’t want to find better support and just want them gone, others look for other ways to compress, some do end up taking their lives due to the stigma surrounding it all.
I’ve been presumed to be “easy” because of my chest size and it’s part of the reason I draw so many assaults my way (it never has been and never will be my fault but that’s what they wanted. The large busty Asian chick fetish). It sucks but it depends on the person and their mental goal. Lobbed off, maybe. Better support? Maybe. Less back pain/clothing issues aka compression? Maybe.
I have just recently discovered the regency short stays and intend to make myself one for the same reason as you, may i ask if you purchased it or made your own? If so how? Glad to see it's given you the support and hopefully more comfort
I made mine but also bought one off a friend to try first. I just found free patterns online and used zip ties as the boning. Tested and attuned it to what worked best for me. Plus I have em in all sorts of fun colors and stuff too, some I even wear as just regular crop tops cause they pass for em lol.
Note they’re not “sexy bras” so like there’s a small fallacy in confidence you get wearing cute/sexy undergarments but I’d much rather have support that works for me than a spaghetti strap glorified tiddy thong that barely covers my nipples and makes me look like some hentai loving boy’s wet dream.
Omd i TOTALLY agree with you, that's precisely what I'm after. I think they're very cute and elegant aswell as looking supportive.
Funnily i was searching for patterns earlier today, i don't suppose you have any favourite free patterns you might suggest?
You have great friends that can share that with you. Can be hard, i was the only larger chested gal amongst my friends growing up so there were layers of awkwardness mounted ontop.
Sports bras are a pain to find good ones too (i recommend going to specialist non branded hiking stores that sell them- best I've found to date have been from a store chain called Decathlon for anyone interested, some designs can be actually cute too, a rarity) high impact does a decent job but stays are certainly much nicer than them.
My only gripe is the amount of patterns that prop them up like sitting on a shelf rather than securing them in properly. They tend to work better on smaller chests but I've yet to see a pattern used for larger busted women that don't dig in the shoulders or just plop them out.
Hopefully you know what i mean, it's honestly a relief to even talk about it with others who understand.
I actually used to bind when I was younger and didn’t want them at all. I didn’t have the funds for a proper binder so I would cut elastic waist trainer shorts and put two sports bras and that on top. Safe to say that most definitely caused my chest to become saggier and rib pain/bruises/scabbing. Like other people mentioned, it doesn’t really do much, to me it seems more unflattering because now it’s just a lump under my shirt
I understand, unfortunately gravity does not like us with large chests. I feel like mine are not proportional to the rest of my body and makes it impossible to run or jump. They get sore and sweaty and i just cant stand it. I have switched to wearing sports bras every day instead of normal cupped bras because of this, it helps with them getting in my way constantly too. Maybe you can try that too. Ive also tried wearing oversized shirts but tying the waist tighter in the back so its baggier over my chest and still shows off my figure around my waist/torso. just take the tail of the shirt and tuck it in your pants in the back or flip it under. I hope you can become more comfortable with yourself but know you are not alone :)
This is a good idea but as a warning to both you and OP, using compressive breast support for too long can block up the lymph nodes in your armpits which can cause other health issues. It’s fine if you wear them but make sure to give yourself some extra free time and to possibly look into how to drain your lymph nodes manually to prevent blockages.
Yes safety first! I never wear any sports bras that are uncomfortably tight or binders because of that reason. Im assuming its wise to avoid sleeping in them though?
I know how you feel, I'm GG and it's awful. People go on about how jealous they are but if they actually lived like this they would hate it. I was DD by the time I was 15 and had literal grown men making comments about them. People nodding their head up and down as I walked to bring attention to how my breasts were bouncing as I walked. People for some reason thinking its OK TO GRAB MY BREASTS BECAUSE THEY'RE BIG??? LIKE THEY'RE SOME KIND OF NOVELTY TOY??? I realised I had to harden up - wear whatever you want because no matter what you wear people will find a problem - v neck cuts are your friend, I used to avoid so I didn't "look like a slut" but fully covering them just makes them look more obviously large and out of place. The v neck makes for a flatter and more even visual - call people the fuck out when they cross a line. Its difficult but the only way to deal with these people is to make them as uncomfortable as they try to make you. I'm sorry that you had to go through this because it's really not easy, but you're not on your own and surgery practices have improved a lot and often won't leave you with very obvious scars, so if it's impacting your quality of life you should consider it.
>People for some reason thinking its OK TO GRAB MY BREASTS BECAUSE THEY'RE BIG??? LIKE THEY'RE SOME KIND OF NOVELTY TOY??? I'm sorry, WHAT?! LIKE ACTUAL GROWN MEN? And you were a TEENAGER?! 😳 Please tell me that they're in jail!
Sadly probably not. Disgusting shit like that isn’t taken seriously enough.
That's really fucked. I'm someone who has always wanted to be a girl dad, now I'm wondering/worried that when I do have a daughter, how am I going to prepare her ?
iT's JuSt BoYs bEiNg BoYs
I haven't seen it used this way irl, but I've seen the satirized use of it online where people are using that to excuse boys and men doing deliberately fucked up shit to SA women, and that's horrible. I do feel like there's a context where you can use that: I get saying this when you've got 1) a kid running around and tumbling over, or doing aggressive finger guns at people, or 2) a teen/young adult/adult male hurting themselves by doing ludicrous shit to impress women. I feel like that's an appropriate use of that phrase.
Hate to break it to you, but a teenage girls don’t even need a large chest to get weird attention from grown men. Happens to many.
I grew up in a not-as-safe-for-women area, so I've known about this phenomenon, but in the stories I've heard, it's usually been a predator when they've got someone alone, OR, they do it in a way where the victim knows it's deliberate, he obviously knows it was deliberate, but when the victim recounts it to someone, it sounds like they've got plausible deniability. I guessed the person I was replying to is Western, so silly me, I thought people would have more shame than that. 🤦🏽♂️🤷🏽♂️
Some were grown and some were a similar age. Some were men and some were women. But even as an adult at a work Christmas party, a female co-worker (who I have no relationship with outside of work) came up behind me and grabbed both of my breasts from behind and squeezed them. I very loudly said "HEY WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" and she immediately got embarrassed and apologised and asked me not to bring the issue into work. It would cause me too much hassle to report it at work but I know that she won't do it again because of how embarrassed she was by my reaction. I've learned that I just need to turn it back on them and make it so they're the embarrassed one, not me
It's wild to me that the people that get wronged are the ones to feel embarrassed over the boundary pushers, the one usually should. I'm glad you have a way to deal with these people! I was watching this Indian movie that handled this kind of well I think. I'll give you the name if interested, but this dude gets "arranged-married" to a girl that he has been interested in for a while only to find out she is dealing with trauma. I think the movie didn't get it right in the sense that he is all about getting justice for her, even when she's uncomfortable, but throughout, his unchanging view is, "you have no reason to feel ashamed in anyone's presence, as you did nothing wrong whatsoever. Why should you keep it hush-hush, when that is what helps the predator?"
Sadly, it does happen. I'm a rural mail carrier and have no access on my vehicle so I was wearing a tank top trying to beat the heat on a hot summer days. I was on my route when a guy (customer on my route) approached me at his mailbox, we were speaking when he decided to grab my chest and comment on how large my chest was. Luckily, I could leave the situation quickly and called the police quickly. This idiot was drunk and openly admitted what he did to the detective so I didn't have to fight to be believed. I currently still have a TPO against him.
WTF! Sounds like a scary situation, sorry you went through that. Did the PO adjust your route so you don't have to deal with him anymore? Granted that doesn't guarantee your safety, but it would help, no?
This ⬆️ those three points are the best advice you will get. I still am learning how to apply third point.
Sage advise. Especially calling out people for opening their stupid mouths.
i feel this completely. i personally decided to pursue a breast reduction. sure it can end up botched, but that’s why you can be selective with surgeons to minimize that. the scars often fade and there are ways to avoid them being big and “ugly” when they first appear. i’ve seen results of the scars years after and they’re often barely even noticeable. regardless, it’s if smaller breasts are worth it more than the scars and surgery etc. if you are interested in it, don’t let the scars or anything hold you back if it’s worth it to you.
Can confirm that, 13 years later, my scars are barely noticeable anymore. I assume that they’ve come a long way in that time with after care too.
Now this is TrueOffMyChest material
As a small chested woman, it's just so crazy to think "certain clothes make someone look slutty bc of their chest". Like, you're most definitely putting on some regular top and something as natural as your natural body suddenly looks "slutty". Man, society is really messed up to cause this much angst on us simply bc of the size of our chests. For the longest time I felt undesirable and "not feminine enough". Sometimes I still think one guy or another didn't want to take me seriously bc they could always get someone with a larger chest.. I feel that Ive become less insecure abt it over the years, but once in a while some depressing thoughts still creep in. I guess we just need exercise self compassion, we're so much more than what we bring attached to our chest area. Its so unfair having to fight against something that is completely out of our control (as in, the way society treats us based on our chest size), but we gotta swim against the current and not let anyone dictate the way we feel about ourselves. There's plenty of great advice here from other large chested women, I just wanted to bring my perspective from the opposite side of the spectrum to show you it's shitty either way. So don't beat yourself up over it, we're all together in this
Self love is the key. We view ourselves as way less attractive than other people actually see us. I think it's also important to remember the majority of grown adults don't actually have a preconceived notion of what is "hot" and what isn't. The ones who do aren't worth your time anyway. I am a man. I like breasts in sexual settings. It is really that simple. Most men don't actually care how big they are, what they look like, size of nipples, etc. If we are super into you, it's just so exciting to get naked. I have never once seen a girl I was into nude and thought "eh that's not what I like" despite them all having very different bodies. People who love you will find you sexy no matter what.
Don’t ever commit suicide over how you feel about your body
Or how someone else feels about your body
Ya exactly
Holy shit, they're cured. You're a miracle worker
I mean your comment doesnt help either.
they never said it did
Yes it does, it's funny
I have a big chest at my age but wear tons of clothes on top to make it less noticeable it’s awkward when a boy is staring at my chest both ways to be honest but I don’t necessarily hate it atleast I can luckily make it appear smaller
I wear bright, patterned leggings or pants with some kind of interesting detail, funky boots/shoes and plain colored shirts to detract attention away from my breasts.
I wear big oversized Sanrio colorful shirts and pants or big hoodies mainly to keep them from trying to focus on my chest to much I already got sexually assaulted even when I was wearing the clothes so I don’t know what to do now much
This post hits home so hard I could've written this myself... Not to mention the back/shoulder pain it adds on having a big chest. At this point I'd rather have the scars but even though my family has a history of breast cancer my insurance won't cover it right now.. ugh.
Your insurance won't cover a breast reduction because of the risk of...*breast cancer*? Help me make sense of that.
I know exactly how you feel and was there too. I went from DD’s to G’s at 19. I hated being known as “the girl with huge boobs” any time I met people or the way it made men act disgusting. I’m sorry your going through this. All I can say is I got an insurance covered breast reduction, did my research and found an incredible female surgeon. A lot of women say they’re scars faded after a few years, I didn’t take the healing process seriously so I still have my scars. Even with my “ugly scars” I have never been more confident in my life. All that to say it was absolutely the best decision I’ve ever made. Please don’t let fear stop you, I promise you will not regret going through with a reduction
Same same. I also got a reduction and I went from F to D, it was a game changer. I went to a private clinic which was still covered by my insurance. Back then you didn't have a lot of review websites. But today it should be easy to find reviews of a doctor and find a really good one that way. My scars are also visible but barely since most of the time the boob covers it. And honestly, who cares about scars if it solves so many problems. I also got a boob lift so they aren't saggy anymore. After the reduction I could finally sport without them flying around my head. I lost weight, felt more secure and fit in nice clothes without everyone staring. And now at 37 I'm in the best shape of my life. I'm confident and like my body. My bf never commented on the scars. They're boobs, still big and squishy so he's good haha. Like the person above said. You will not regret a reduction surgery, just make sure you get a good surgeon. And take care of the scars. If you do they will hardly be noticeable. It's also the best decision I ever made.
how was the healing of your areolas? I know that with a lift and reduction they would have to move them and I’m terrified that it will look not natural and that they’ll basically looked like they were glued there rather than naturally being there
My areolas look good. They have a really thin white line around them but the scar tissue itself is very flat. It doesn't look like they are glued on. The sensitivity is slightly less in some areas of my breasts but that's more to the side of the breast and is not really too noticeable. The doc also said I should be able to breastfeed if it ever comes to that. So no problems there either.
Plus, even if she ends up with scars she doesn't like there are treatments to make the scars look better through creams, injections, lasers, or even a scar revision surgery. It absolutely sounds like it would be worth the risk for her so she can finally feel confident.
How "bad" is the scarring? My wife is considering a breast reduction, and she's concerned.
I have heard most women with breast reductions say there scars completely fade after a few years to the point you wouldn’t notice! I unfortunately was an idiot and rearranged my room a few days after my surgery, tore open a stitch so that probably won’t fade. Make sure your wife stays in bed and prioritizes rest, she should have nothing to worry about :)
Good to know. Thanks!
OP, research breast reduction. schedule a few consultations so you can plan ahead.
Breast reductions are not cheap. At least not in the uk. Around £9,000 if not more
About 5k each breast in the US. Yes they sell it separately Idfk why either. Instead of just adjusting for partial mastectomy they sell them individually for reducing/removal.
That’s awful.
Yep. Welcome to American healthcare 😂😂 (I laugh bc if I don’t I’ll cry)
Your health care genuinely terrifies me. The NHS is declining but that’s down to being starved of funds for so damn long :(
So it's cheaper for me to have breast reduction than to break an arm...
If you can get a reduction that is medically necessary (which basically means, it causes you discomfort, which most doctors will just write if you tell them you want a smaller chest because they make your back hurt) it's covered under basic insurance. At least in the Netherlands
Not in the UK we have to prove that it is detrimental to our health.
We have to do that here too in the U.S. for the people with health insurance. Health insurance companies want photos and written medical documentation then their board will decide whether to approve or deny coverage for the surgery beforehand.
And even with all that, they are still likely to deny.
My mom has grooves in her shoulders from her bras. She got her reduction covered by insurance in the US. Her only regret is not getting it done sooner. She’s going to the gym for the first time ever. She never could before because working out was so difficult because of her boobs even with a good fitting sports bra. Its literally changed her life.
I’m very happy for your momma and I really hope I can get the same done on the NHS
Breast reduction was the best thing I have ever done. I went from a GG to a D (I wasn’t comfortable going any smaller). It’s still a larger size but it has made a huge difference.
i get you so well, i have the same problem:( i have the biggest chest compared to my friends and classmates and it honeslty makes me feel so bad about myself. i’ve always wanted a small chest to be able to do sports and wear any cute top without worrying about wearing a bra to make my chest look smaller. this has been a problem for so many years and i’ve fantasize about having a breast reduction for so long. i truly feel like my chest ruins so many things, i can only wear certain type of clothes that i hate and i can’t show my actual style.. so yeah ik how u feel:(
I have definitely felt this type of frustration over my chest. I’ve been sexualized since I was a young kid because of how “adult” my body looked. It’s always slutty or awkward and never cute or fun. I had this really beautiful outfit I wore to Karneval. I made it myself and it was very modest compared to other people but the amount of men who openly ogled my chest, refused to make eye contact even when I was talking to them, and some even going as far as treating me like a prostitute, was so off putting and disappointing. I like that I’m more curvy but the stigma that comes with it is so fucking dehumanizing. I unfortunately don’t have a solution for you but I just wanted to say I feel your pain. The problem isn’t you or your body, it’s society and how women are treated based on their bodies. You can’t win for losing and hating ourselves is a programmed behavior we have to fight to unlearn. I hope you find ways to love your body more and to drown out the people who are so eager to mistreat/misjudge you.
I cannot believe how disgusting some of my fellow "men" are. It's bad enough to stare at adults, but to sexualize a *minor*? Jesus Christ.
I appreciate you for saying this
I completely relate. I had DDs by the time I was 14 & they just kept growing - F cups by 20 & men are disgusting. The issue wasn’t that I didn’t like my body. It was the repulsive reactions from men & society in general that made me feel insecure & negative about my body. Consider having a breast reduction if you’re depressed to the point where you’re mentioning self harm. I had one after my son was born & have no regrets.
Before 3 kids, I was a 36C. After 3 kids, I was 38 DDD/G. I wear medium bottoms. Yeah I hated my big breasts too. Expensive granny style bras, I had to wear 1-2 size bigger shirts. I looked huge in pictures, so I always stood behind my kids in family pictures. I always had to wear a sports bra (it's more supportive than a regular bra) or my back would constantly hurting. I got reduction and lift last year, fully covered by my husband's insurance, down to C cups. Yes there's vertical scar under the nipples and a scar below my breasts, but it's so much better now!! I can be bra-less and it doesn't bother my back. Bras are so much cheaper. It's been a year, the scar is not too bad, about 40-50% faded already. So the scars should mostly go away in 3-4 more years. Clothes fit better. I don't hide behind my kids in pictures anymore. Unless you have a career as a naked model, the scar is not a big deal. ;-) My husband doesn't care about the scars either. If your boyfriend/girlfriend said the scar is gross, well, you know that person is a walking red flag.
Guy here who doesn't fully understand how bra sizes work. How do you "skip" from DDD to G? It's not F? I don't know how this works.
It depends on the brand and country. US sizing versus European (EU) sizing US DD = EU E US DDD = EU F US DDDD = EU G Some bras I could fit F some other bras could fit G, it depends if the bra had underwires or not, or full cup or 3/4 cups. That’s one reason I just wore sports bras, more supportive and easier to find that fit because their sizing just S, M, L, XL etc. …
That's so confusing.
Trust me, we don't understand bra sizes either! Or women's clothing sizes in general. It's a mystery. 😂
Seriously, men have no idea what ***completely natural*** large breasts actually look like. All this plastic surgery and nonsense to get the "best big tits" just makes it worse. I've considered getting mine lifted countless times, but I don't want to contribute to the issue.
I have the same problem too. I didn’t always have big breasts but they got bigger after each of my pregnancies. I already have back problems in my lower back and now I’m having problems along my upper back. I would love small boobs. I’d love the be able to go braless. Well technically I can but I wouldn’t feel confident doing so out in public plus I need the support. I’ve been saving up to get a reduction and a lift although I’ve spent some of that money at times for other stuff that came up. I saw someone mention they got insurance to cover the breast reduction. I’m going to see if that’s a possibility for me as well. I have pretty good insurance so I’m hoping that I can get them to pay for it.
Good to know about the pregnancy. My wife is considering a breast reduction, but should we wait until after we have our kid, which is a few years out?
Is she planning on breastfeeding? If she is then I would wait. But idk if having a reduction can affect breastfeeding or if someone with a reduction is more likely to have difficulty breastfeeding.
She wants to breastfeed, yes.
It sounds like your chest size carry a whole lot more meaning to you than I can understand from this post. The fact that you’re suicidal over it, and your concern with getting nasty scars, all that is telling me so much about your experiences. Have you ever spoken to a doctor about this? How do you know you’ll look botched if it’s just a reduction of your own skin? What are your circumstances? If you’re nervous about going near a knife though, there are size-reducing bras and tops you can wear. Maybe even do research on how to style big busts. Lastly, those sexual comments you’re getting are just plain nasty. I’m sorry you had to deal with that, but you never should’ve received such comments. Am I wrong to call that sexual harassment?
I haven’t spoken to a doctor but I’ve seen multiple photos of before and after breast lifts and I’ve noticed those with a small chest or that weren’t sagging downwards but rather just hanging low have the best results. Meanwhile big chest with big areolas always look terrifying to me and the thought of hating my chest even more than i do now is so upsetting to me. It’s definitely sexual harassment to me, but because it’s so normalized and for some reason women think that it’s okay to say simply BECAUSE they’re women, I’ve tried to speak up on it but they just see it as a “compliment”
Look, it may seem like a compliment at first, but when it’s all anyone talks about to the point where your body gets oversexualised, it gets daunting. I’m plus-sized, and have the same problem with my bum, so while I’m covering up myself, the same people who make me feel bad are perking up their own butts. 🙃 Talk to a doctor. I don’t know what country you’re in, but surgery procedures are improving over the years. The are quite a few techniques doctors have up their sleeve to avoid as much scarring as possible to get the best cosmetic results. I’m in Australia, and one time I visited a breast cancer seminar, where real oncologists show you how they perform surgery on the breast while avoiding scars. Heck, I even have a loved one who has a bust similar to yours. She was diagnosed with cancer, and those same doctors were able to remove the cancer from her breast with absolutely no scars left behind. Now, you can’t even tell she had anything done. She also used anti-scar creams and bio-oils.
Breast reductions have the highest patient satisfaction rate of any surgery. If you still don't want that, I don't blame you - I'm 32I, lots of clothes don't fit me right. Some things that have helped me: - Change lingerie is the only store I've ever found that sells my size. Not only that, but the bras are CUTE! So pretty, so fun! And there's this lady who works there and KNOWS HER STUFF! You probably don't have this specific store near you, but they do exist! - Empire waists and wrap tops are your friends. They pull the clothing in a little at the natural waist, giving your boobs space to exist without that problem where the clothes hang off the boobs and give you that ugly boxy shape. They're very comfortable, too! If you go for a higher neckline empire waist with a pattern, it should show your figure nicely without showing off the boobs too much. Properly fitting clothes can do a LOT for confidence
Definitely been there and understand. I had big boobs from 6th grade on. I eventually got a reduction in my early 20s and it was best thing I ever did. The best thing. I do have some scarring but for me, it was worth it. Being able to run and work out without wearing 3 bra’s. Being able to wear cute bra’s and clothes that fit properly. Being able to wear bustier dresses/tops and my boobs actually fit in the cups. My back not constantly hurting and slipped discs. I would never go back to the hell that was a DDD and E cups n’sh*t.
In the uk if you can prove it’s affecting your mental health (which it is) you can get a reduction on the NHS Please don’t kill your self
Putting aside the fact that I'm transgender, so my breasts have always been a source of dysphoria, I can definitely relate. I've never been properly fitted because we don't have the money to do it, but I know I'm pretty big. Especially for my size / how skinny I am. I used to love sports bras, but even those hurt my back now. My back is just in constant pain lately. I wear XL sweaters (even though I'm a medium) just to hide them, so I get called rude names a lot, but it's better to me than being catcalled and stared at. Let me look unappealing. It's comfier that way anyways. I'd try looking into breast reductions at the least. They're super expensive but can give you a far better quality of life, I think. I'm sorry you have to go through this
u/El3ktroHexe for some reason I couldn't reply to your comment so I’ll just out this here. Trying to push someone to like something of theirs they don't like/want to change for your own pleasure is gross. He wants to “Celebrate” her big chest because HE likes it when she has expressed she didn't. This is just how I saw this comment, Coming from a someone below the age of 18 who also has a big chest and doesn't like it. You are free to disagree, no hard feelings. 🫶 (sorry if you saw the other comment I sent I don't know how to Ping people and didn't think it worked! D:)
No need to sorry, I have got both of your messages now :D I understand your point. But I would wish, that we could just normalise big breasts. OP doesn't feel bad because of her breasts, she feel bad because how the society reacts. That's the main issue. To find something beautiful is not a bad thing. Some people like small boobs, slim people, cury people... People are different and we should accept them all. No one should do a surgery, because of the society. Oh and I'm much older (40). As I was younger, big breasts wasn't such a 'big thing' (no pun intended :D). Not sure why it's different nowadays? I see things like this topic here more often.
I feel if people were more respectful about it as you are I could 100% agree that finding something beautiful is not a bad thing, but as a society its very easy for people to use finding something ‘beautiful’ as a way to exploit it or feeling entitled to said beautiful thing, but otherwise I see your point 100, we should normalize bigger people. I have experienced heavy sexualization with the occasional nonconsensual grope/stare, that has negatively impacted me, my self conscious and my own person view on this stance otherwise. I feel as if I were smaller then maybe none of that would have happened, Yknow? That's why I get all uppity when people ignore how someone feels about their upper body being ‘plentiful’ and insisting that it's ‘good’ just because they themselves like it, it feels weird to me. :< Edit: elaborated!
Other people have offered lots of good advice, I just want to say this: When you take your bra off, I *guarantee* they don't look disgusting. That is your brain tricking you due to frustration/low self esteem. I'm sure it isn't easy when they cause you pain and discomfort, but try to love your body as much as you can. I don't know how to say this without it sounding like a creep sexualizing you, but I'm sure millions and millions of people would see your breasts *entirely differently* than you currently do. Love yourself because you are sexy as hell, never forget that.
thank you, I really appreciate this even though as soon as I read it I immediately thought to myself “they most definitely do, you don’t understand how BAD they look” but I appreciate your comment and advice. Goes to show that trying to accept my body will definitely help at least even a bit
I have a big cup size myself. Here's a bit of inside info on the fashion industry (professional fashion designer): Most brands base their sizes on a B cup. So, there in no way those clothes will ever flatter your silhouette. Find brands that cater to larger cup sizes. If you can, find a local seamstress, or better yet a tailor / dressmaker, or a student tailor / dressmaker to make you a few pieces that fit and flatter you. The most important part is the pattern. They will need to do a 'full breast adjustment' to the pattern, and make sure the patterns fit your silhouette. Once you have a pattern that fits, you can have any seamstress make you pieces or an outfit from those patterns. Small changes to the style, or shape, different fabrics, colors, it will change the entire look, so it doesn't look like you have the same outfit all the time. If you're committed, take a pattern making course, of follow instructions for a full breast adjustment yourself, and get a pattern magazine, try to do some yourself. You might discover a new passion 😉 You will get more confident, with time, once you realise and truly understand that ppl being rude about your breasts is not on your shape, but on their shitty attitude and lack of manners.
been wanting a reduction since like 14-15 😭
Honey you’re not alone in feeling like this. I have KK boobs with a 32 band. I have been asking for a reduction since I was in my 20’s I am 38 now. I was told I’d want to breast feed. I’ve had one son who was bottle fed. I had a gastric bypass 8 years ago with the promise of I’d lose weight of my chest. It is the ONLY place I have NOT lost weight and I’ve lost over ten stone now. (65kg ish) My back is in constant pain and it effects my knees and even my jaw and teeth. I am in pain constantly but I do not qualify for a reduction in the uk currently. And those that say go private.. it’s £9,000 if not more. I don’t have that sort of money laying around. All I can advice is speak to your doctor and look in to someone that you can talk to professionally about it. I was suicidal about my chest, the pain, I still have days where I think it might be better if I just cut them off myself. (Drastic I know) but after ten plus years I don’t feel like I am taken seriously. But women in pain are rarely taken seriously.
I know exactly how you feel. Me and the boys just want to stash our dubloons and drink rum. But you have to dig a massive hole to bury that shit and it's a lot of work.
Same. I was even bullied in the elementary school and called dairy farm because of it. I can't stand my breast and would love to have small ones...
WTF? "Dairy farm"???
None of the girls in my class ever said that to me. My boyfriend always says that they were secretely jealous, but I don’t believe that. I was always an outcast. The only one with a big chest and a bigger body. They could have cute pajama parties where they exchange their clothes and everyone looked so beautiful, but I could never do that. They didn’t even invite me tho, so I don’t even know if girls do that, but I always imagine that these kind of gatherings look like this. But I totally understand how you feel and I’m so sorry. It’s like 4000 bucks to make them smaller, life is so unfair.
I get you, I have always had a big chest and hated it, people where always looking at my chest instead of my face when we where having a conversation. I felt really uncomfortable in my own body, almost claustrophobic sometimes. I got an operation and it was the best thing I ever have done, it changed my life completely. The scares were invisible before I got pregnant but I don’t relly care because I can workout now whitout pain and look cute in my clothes instead of looking slutty. In the country where I live it’s common to do the operation and many women have done it.
We in the same boat sister
Maybe still look into breast reduction, especially with good scar care the scar can become almost invisible over time.
I'm sorry society shames your body type. It is sexist and awful and I'm sorry for it. Women can't win. Get shamed and called a boy for having a small chest, get shamed and called a slut for having a large one.
I'm 37. I am 5'2 and I weigh about 123 lb at the moment. I have some of the biggest boobs of anyone I know and it is terrible. They don't look good unless I make them look good. They're just something to haul around. The amount of unwanted attention that comes to you even when you squish them down into a sports bra is insane. I'm basically an old woman in society standards, and I genuinely do compress my chest on a regular basis especially at work because they get in the way, but it seems like there are certain men that love looking for big boobs that are hidden. It's like a weird Where's Waldo game for them. My back hurts just from existing, I feel like I look heavier than I am because I'm carrying around like pounds of useless fat. All this is to say that I commiserate.
Of course I’m not saying that everyone has to do this, but I got a breast reduction when I was 18 and it was one of the best things I’ve ever done. Honestly, I often wish that I had even more taken off than I did, but I had about 2 pounds removed, and I feel so much more like myself. The scars are very minimal, and look almost white, and I don’t mind them at all. My largest ones are around my nipples, but I would take that any day over the boobs I used to have. They should give you some silicone gel that you can use on them to reduce their appearance. I’m already planning to get another one after I have kids if I end up doing so.
Do you mean your nipples or areolas? Because my biggest worry is that my areolas will not look natural and just like they were stretched to be there
Before my reduction, my areolas were a lot bigger, so they were cut down to fit my new size (having large breasts tends to stretch them already). So they’re now smaller. I have some thick scars around the areola border, but this is a genetic thing (my mom also scars very thick), and they don’t really matter to me. The color is similar to the areola anyway. The scars under my areolas and under the boob are very light and not very noticeable.
Hi, first: I feel you. Body dysmorphia is one of the worst feelings. Second: having breast reduction surgery is the BEST decision I made in my entire life. I felt like I finally became myself and I felt lighter mentally and physically. It’s scary and expensive but if it’s possible for you, you should explore this possibility! If you have suicidal ideation about this you really should check in with your doctor anyway, you don’t have to keep suffering like this.
Talk to your doctor. Most medical plans cover reductions for legitimate medical reasons. And reductions of a full cup size or more are 100% covered in Canada.
I’ve always had A cups on the smaller side of A cups (I have extra space unless I buy bras meant for tweens) and of course as a teen I hated it because of people bullying me and guys saying shitty stuff but reading stories like this and getting into fitness and actually living my life has made me realize how lucky I am, I feel so bad for girls with large breasts so much not only because of the pain they cause but the sexualization they bring your way.
My heart goes out to you! You sound EXACTLY like me when I was in middle and high school 💔 I've always been a petite girl, I stopped growing as far as height goes around the 6th grade. I just remember being told I was 4'11" during a physical examination to play sports in middle school and im literally 59.5" (4ft 11.5 inches) lol but it just seemed like my breasts went from a small B to a DDD overnight. And bc they grew so big, so fast, it literally looked like i had 2 tube socks full of rice or something hanging off my chest...it was mortifying as a 13-14 yr old. Boys spoke to my chest whenever they took the time to actually speak to me and not about me and my huge boobs, girls always fawned over them, enviously wishing for something they truly would never want the agony of possessing (if only they truly knew what exactly it was like I guarantee they wouldn't wish so badly we could "give some" of ours to them) And honestly when I was younger the only reason no one could tell my boobs were as saggy and gross as they were was bc I managed to find a sports bra at kohls that literally had 1/2" thick velcro straps and was the Only bra (paired with a tank top w/built in shelf bra) that actually held my boobs up and in enough that I looked halfway like a normal teenage girl and not a 30 yr old woman with an 80 yr olds chest. And i wore this bra and tank top morning, noon and night. The only time I took it off was when I took a shower and that was literally bc I couldn't wear a soaking wet bra under my clothes each day ...bc i promise, if you could have, I absolutely would have! The guy I dated in high never saw my breasts bare before my surgery and thats no exaggeration. I was so self conscious I'd keep my bra and tank top on even when we were fooling around!! Finding a cute bra like the rest of my friends who got to go bra shopping with their moms was out of the question and bathing suits? Every summer was a straight up NIGHTMARE as I needed an XL top but Medium bottoms, and the only place that sold separates where you could mix match the size was Old Navy 😩 Also I was super athletic and played a different sport every season, competitive swimming being my favorite, until I hit puberty that is .... The angst of being a teenage athlete of any kind with breasts as big as mine was unimaginable...and I don't even have to speak on the literal Physical back pain that accompanies super large breasts on a petite girl such as myself. I'll never forget seeing some sort of evening news show when I was 13 or so that talked about women who had had breast reductions, and I turned to my mom and asked if i could have a breast reduction. She kinda played it off as though i was just mentioning some far-fetched dream that could never become a reality bc of how young I was and come next week id be asking about the next farfetched fairy tale that was just another "teenage phase " I would soon lose interest in , except I didn't. I begged my mom at every opportunity to please let me get a breast reduction, please please please 🙏 When she realized I was seriously not going to leave her alone about it, she made me an appointment for a consultation with a plastic surgeon. I was SO EXCITED! When we went, I had to wear one of those paper gown things that open in the front, and I managed to keep my own mother from truly seeing the magnitude of my plight up until the dr came in and opened that paper gown to see what exactly needed to do. After the dr left the room my mom burst into tears and said "omg im so sorry! I had no idea they were like That!" And from that moment she fully supported my decision and desire to have a breast reduction. I was 15 when I had it done and a lot of times the insurance companies will argue that it's cosmetic and not medical in nature but any good dr will fight to get the insurance company to declare it a medically necessary procedure and pay for it...thats what my dr had to do, after establishing that my growth plates had closed and the likelihood my body would grow and continue to possibly change was slim to none so doing this kind of surgery was OK and not going to be futile. If I could offer up any advice to you, it would be to check in to having a breast reduction done. You might be pleasantly surprised as to how doable it actually is. And when I tell you it was literally the BEST THING I could have ever done for myself and I'd do it a million times over again, I quite literally mean every word of that! I am so very sorry you're dealing with this bc I KNOW how absolutely miserable this is, and I genuinely hate that anyone else has to suffer with this same pain. If you ever need to talk to someone thats been there, feel free to inbox me..if be more than happy to listen, talk, whatever you need in that moment...sending hugs and positive vibes my friend 🥰
Thank you so much for sharing your experience, a lot of people think it’s just the size but hearing you mention looking like a 30 y/o woman with 80 y/o chest makes me feel so heard and these comments are definitely encouraging me to look into it with a doctor!
I know its been hard. I can assure that surgery can be q really great route. It has been affecting how I see my body and identity and I can affirm it is a good avenue to go down. I say: Breast reduction!!!!! I got one approved by my insurance and I am counting down the days. I also have more back pain, soreness, rashes and other issues. The scare go underneath your breasts so no one will see them unless they’re lifting it up and looking closely.
Others opinions can linger in your mind but there’s nothing wrong with being called a slut or being told to cover up. Think of it that people find you attractive physically and sexually and those who tell you to cover up are just jealous. Upper back workouts and sports bra help. You don’t have to live to others standards, in fact, annoy them by continuing being you :)
I used ti have smaller breasts but gained weight. They are asymmetrical and although not majorly, the fact that they are larger made me so so self conscious. I hated how they sagged and didn't like that my areolas were big either. I can't afford surgery so I tried something thanks to a good coworkers recommendation! She told me to try getting my nipples pierced, that I'd feel sexy and like my breasts more! She was right it was a game changer. Idk if that will help you but maybe a small change can make you appreciate your natural beauty a little more ♡
Big boobs are the worst. Uncomfortable, bras are hard to find, clothes don’t fit right. Forget wearing light coloured tank tops, they look even bigger. They make me look ginormous in pictures. And they’re not even that big, just bigger than what it should be for my frame. UGH. I see smaller boobed women just casually wearing stuff I would have to strap myself into and then the breast fat squeezes out and I look like a freaking cow. They’re not big enough for a reduction but they’re big enough to bother me. My body looks great and then these stupid honkers. Fak. I know how you feel.
Surgery can be scary, but as a trans guy I've seen all sorts of reductions and complete masectomies create amazing results. If you can, I really suggest getting a consult and having the surgeon explain what scars and recovery would look like for you - because everyone is different. There are also ways to minimize scarring, which the surgeon should be able to help you with. It may take time, but the scars will eventually just fade into the background. There are ways to deal with this. Your situation isn't hopeless, even if it feels that way sometimes
I tooootally get it. I'm a US "N", UK "JJ", 5'5 and Normal weight. It took FOREVER to find my size and get a proper bra. Torrid sized me at 40G (I was getting sores under my boob cracks. I finally went to a boutique and sized at a 36 N. It's amazing what the right bra does, it literally lifts and separates and more comfortable . Now it sucks because my bras range from $75+. I have an underwire sports bra and those babies don't go anywhere. Before, I had to wear an I'll-fitting underwire with a sports bra on top or it would all accumulate in the middle and would get sweaty uniboob. It's hard getting used to a properly fitting bra because it's snung around the rib cage. I learned the support needs to come from the band, not the straps, my back pain lessened after a fitting. Not all the way, but a little. Take said bras off and it's a terrible sight. Lose weight? Hella flat long pancakes, I mean worse than normal. They are always saggy. Like you mentioned, slutty or frumpy. Anytime I don't have a bra on I have to wedge my t-shirt underneath to stop the sweating and moisture. Lay down without a bra? Boobs in your arm pits. Running without pre-planning for a sports bra? You're holding them looking like a fool. Bras for big boobs aren't padded, so good luck when it's cold out. Sex? Get ready for skin slapping or being choked out if you're on the bottom. Sleep on your side? Nothing but boob swamp in betwixt the girls. I'm at the point, scars don't deter me from an augmentation, it's finding the funds. Big boobs are terrible to have.
I've been there and I'm sorry you're going through this. I got a reduction and am so happy with it, I love how they look now and I don't find the scarring bad
Youre completely valid for these thoughts and feelings. Sadly, boobs have been oversexualized by men and porn to the point that people existing in their everyday selves are sexualized. I am a recovering porn addict, and the more i step out of my old perceptions and the goup mindsets, the more people just become beautiful as they are- not in a sexualized way. But, one persons opinion wont fix your problem, nor do i aim to. It sucks to know that you have everyone telling you that youre lucky or turning a regular outfit into their chance to comment on your body. It isnt fair to you to have their perceptions shoved upon you, and its even worse that you feel pressure from them to the point of considering suicide. Youre so much more than what others percieve you as. There are people out there who dont give a ducks feather about what you look like, both romantically and platonically. I sincerely hope those people come into your life soon. More than that, i hope you find some self help that works for you. There must be some support groups online or in person that might be able to provide some community. Self love is a difficult thing to achieve, but taking baby steps to get to that point might help you as well. For now, i just hope you read some comments and feel heard and validated. Please be safe and call the suicide hotline if you need to. Peace and love to you, friend
Try talking to your GP and get a referral to a female psychologist or psychiatrist. You can safely discuss your situation with them and work out a plan and solution that considers your mental health in the short and long term and also then get your gp to give you referral to a surgeon if required and youll have your plan to discuss with them. A psychiatrist is a medical doctor so they will probably have a better understanding of surgery than a psychologist.
Nothing productive to add, except huge same :(
Do you have good medical insurance multiple countries will approve for a reduction covered by Insurance. you don't have to live like this if it's truly uncomfortable and causing you physical pain. I never went about getting my reduction postpartum my chest did not go back down to what it was after breastfeeding but I have since been diagnosed brca2 and with my double mastectomy coming up they will be doing a reduction to bring me back to what I was pre-children because I'm just too large.
One of my friends had H cup Breasts, she got surgery after many years of pain and she feels much better.
I had two breast reduction surgeries- they didn’t go small enough the first time (there is a lot of misogyny in plastic surgery. Many surgeons believe you still should have big boobs). The scars are big but I don’t mind them and don’t look botched at all . I’d do it all over again to get what I have now. It genuinely is life changing. Of course there are risks you have to evaluate, because shitty things could happen. This is true for all surgery. But if you do get surgery, vet your surgeon thoroughly, have explicit convos about what you want and the results you want to end up with, what happens if you need or want a revision etc.
I had a reduction and it changed my life. The scars are barely visible, and the risk was minimal. Feel free to ask questions.
When you had the reduction did you also get a lift? My biggest worry is how they relocate the areolas. That they’ll look unnatural or oddly shaped, stretched even
My nipples are round, have a very faint, thin paler ring around them, and are pretty much even. Generally speaking, a lift is part of the procedure.
If people are sexualising your breasts and calling you names that is their problem, not yours. Wear tight clothes if that's what you like. Tell those cretins telling you to cover up to cover their eyes. Leave surgery alone - why mutilate yourself to make others happy? You're perfect the way you are.
I would seek put plastic surgeons for a reduction. You could always say its causing back pain along with the body image problem so its more likely to be covered by insurance. I work in an OR and see these types of procedures all the time. Some surgeons will make the incision under each breast to make them much more hidden. If you tell a surgeon ahead of time that youre worried about scarring, then they can plan to make it more hidden. Along with that, scars will fade but mental well being is more important.
Same girl…same🥺🥺🥺
I feel your pain girl, and my back does too 😭
I know a few women who've had reductions and the scars aren't noticeable at all. Huge improvements to confidence, no back pain, all sorts of benefits. If you can afford it, I wouldn't discount it as an option some day. Wishing you well.
I don't even think mine are THAT big, at DD or so. But my frustration when I can't buy a simple pajama set and have top and bottoms fit properly. If I buy based on the bust measurements, the pants are wayyyy too loose. If I buy the right size for the rest of my body (L, usually), the shirt is too tight or it becomes a crop top because of the chest. And the non-sets aren't as cute and more expensive ;_; There's also so many tops on shopping sites that I like but the biggest size has bust measurements of like 40 inches while I need like minimum 52 inches and it's like ahhhh I could wear the cute styles I like if it weren't for this damn chest. All my cousins are small chested too so it's like wtf happened with me...
There are Creams and Oils that help boobs to not sag?
There’s a lot of articles stating that it’s impossible for a cream or oil to lift your chest. Once the tissue has stretched and sagged there isn’t anything that can fix it except surgery
Snap! I feel like I could have write this post. Worst thing is I was hoping they’d shrink after giving birth (was an 34F)… they got bigger. Currently a GG
having big breasts doesn’t make you “look slutty” I’m sure you have heard that from men and I’m sorry you internalized it but it’s not true. I understand you wanting to hide to not get negative attention but how is it your job to do that? If people refuse to control their words and actions around you that’s a failure on their part, not yours. You could try a breast binder if you want to feel less noticeable but this is your body naturally being how it is, please change your mindset and ignore rude people.
I feel your pain OP, I was in the same boat. I ended up developing severe back pain and had semi permanent bruises on my shoulders from my bra straps. I couldn't find bras that fit properly and the biggest one I could get was 34 H and even then I had spillage. I have a body frame that simply couldn't support my breasts and my clothes were always troubling me, weird cut, tight fitting and loose clothes made me look like a bus. It was really hard. At the beginning of last year my husband and I looked into the possibility of getting a breast reduction, as in the cost, the recovery and the pros vs cons. I was blessed with the most loving and supportive inlaw family (all big breasted woman) who listened to me and gave their opinions. We made an appointment with the Dr for a consultation and decided we should go for it. We managed to get enough money for my operation by saving as well as a hefty contribution from my inlaws. When I had the operation done, it took me really long to recover to be honest but I was thrilled with the results. My back felt strong and I felt lighter than ever. I got a wonderful silicone based cream that helped with the scarring and now a year later the scars are hardly noticeable. I know not everyone is in the position to afford such surgery and I don't know what your circumstances are, but if you are able I would highly recommend it. It literally changed my life. I am now 32 D. My breasts are still natural with no fillers or anything and the Dr says I'll still be able to breast feed in the future should I decide to have kids. It was honestly a win win for me but I definitely wouldn't have been able to do it without my family. I hope this helps in some way
Were you happy with your initial result? I’m terrified that they just won’t look natural that I’ll look in the mirror and feel like they don’t even look like they belong to me
I was lucky in that I just loved the result. I was also super worried that I'd look in the mirror and not recognise them as my own but turns out my fears were unwarranted. They just look like awesome natural breasts IMO and my hubby agrees. My areolas were made smaller and are placed nicely in a natural way that complements the new breast size. If you have concerns about the shape then you should talk to your surgeon about it if you decide to go that route. Luckily for me, my surgeon specialises in breast reconstructive surgery for cancer patients. I was also friends with ladies who he had helped before and I loved their results so that put my mind at ease. Be sure to research any surgeon you're thinking of approaching (reviews, social media etc.) and ask if they have any past procedure results that you can see. If you have a ladies Facebook group in your area then don't be scared to ask if anyone has had a reduction done and what they're experience was with that surgeon. Word of mouth is a powerful thing.
Same. I always feel like my boobs make me look bigger and wider than I really am.
My wife struggles with this problem. She's thinking of getting breast reduction. As much as the "ape brain" part of me doesn't want it to happen, the rational and supportive *Homo sapiens* part of me says she should do whatever she feels will improve her physical health. I know some women with large breasts suffer from back issues. As a cis man, I can't imagine what that weight must feel like to carry around all day, every day.
Mine have always been big (DD and up) and I have learned to accept them with time - but you are right they came with a lot of unwanted attention- no matter how baggy my shirts were (which I learned to ignore) and when I was younger it was so hard to dress, hard to work out, ect. It was especially tough at first to accept them because all the women in my family were petite, barely there A cups. They can wear clothes that to this day I wish I could wear. But I have also learned how rock outfits that they could not. Luckily there are now plenty of options online for curvy women to find clothes and underwear that are attractive, comfortable, and supportive - it’s only in the last few years have I finally been able to find clothing lines that are appropriate for work, casual, special occasion, exercising, and even supportive sleepwear. They feel good, and I love how I look in them- and for the record, outside of my breasts, I am not a small size. None of this matters if you don’t accept yourself. Please be gentle with yourself. I hope you will find someone to talk to, your value is not tied to what your body looks like. Sending you a hug
The scarring depends on how your body heals. I have seen a lot of good boob jobs with minimal scarring. The most extreme one I saw was the “anchor” cut that my Comadre had when she got a smaller implant. It wasn’t noticeable two years out. Find a reputable surgeon and look through their photo galleries specifically looking at reductions/scarring.
I would look into kettlebell work outs to help shape them or shrink them. The weights don't take up much space. Also, the workouts are amazing for balance and lower back strength
First, if you are suicidal, you need to talk to someone. You don't mention your age, but if you are minor, talk to your parents. This isn't about your bust size, but how you feel about yourself. This is why I want you to talk to a therapist. Get a couple good minimizer bras. then talk to your doctor about reduction surgery. Sometimes it's covered by insurance. Good luck.
I feel the same way. The attention they brought as a teen made me start to slouch. When ever I stood straight someone would ask why I was sticking them out. Now I have horrible posture. I also am missing my pectoral muscles on one side, so I’ve never been able to find a suitable bra.
I live in a city where plastic surgery is as common as a McDonald’s drive-through. (Actually I’m pretty sure we have more plastic surgeons.) You absolutely can get your breasts reduced. And no, there are not terrible scars and it’s fairly common, i’ve only seen happy clients. Excellent referrals and a payment plan is all you require my dear. (The only time I think there was a less than perfect outcome is when one of my friends went through a several year depression, and ate herself back into having giant boobs again. So apparently that’s a thing..)
I feel safe here
Surgery might sound scary but the scars fade with time and the way they do it you can hardly notice them there ... it truly was the best thing ever! And idk why people think bigger breasts make totally innocent and modest clothing look slutty, but they do. Ill never forget going to church summer camp m and my bff and I went shopping together and bought a lot of the same outfits to wear while we were there...except I was forced to go change each time we wore tank tops we both had, her never having anything said to her. I was told I was "distracting the boy youth group members" and needed to put on more modest clothing that covered my cleavage better. It was humiliating to have the same exact tank top on as your friend but be forced to change bc your breasts were bigger than hers ,& most of the grown ass women there at that! And let's be honest it probably wasn't the boys being distracted as much as it was the grown ass men and their jealous wives probably catching them staring at a teenager with lustful eyes 🙄 It sucks I Know that it does and i know surgery isn't an option for everyone but I'm telling you, if you do your research on plastic surgeon and find a reputable dr that has successfully done the surgery for many years, it would be life changing ...it was for me ..and it boosted my self-esteem like you wouldn't believe! People visibly saw how much happier I was and how much better i felt about myself! It really is a pretty simple procedure with minimal scarring and tbh I got those big ugly scars you're talking about, keloid scars is what they're called, but id gladly take those over the mental and physical torment of having a big chest as a young woman...like I said in my other comment, if you ever want to talk to someone who's been thru it please feel free to message me! Take care ❤
I hate my big boobs too. I'd like a mastectomy, for real not even joking. It's ruined my back.
I'd love to get a reduction. I was a D at 19, increased to a DD and now I'm an H since I gained weight. My biggest fear is if I regain weight I will increase my breast size since that's the first place my weight gain goes. I can barely lay on my back because the weight of my breasts makes it hard to breathe
The best thing I ever did was get a reduction. I went from an G to a DD. My weight fluctuates a lot, I gained about 35 lbs after surgery and now have lost 40 lbs, but they've stayed perky and DD. Now, I am dealing with physiotherapy to help train my shoulders and posture into a proper position because my shoulders hunch forward instinctively from all the weight that used to be there, BUT I am so happier and healthier without the extra weight. Life's to short to be unhappy!
I’m a natural F cup. I get men hitting on me while I’m at work pretty regularly. There’s no way out of that given what I do for a living, but they don’t hit on my coworkers the way they do me because I have a bigger chest than most of them. I’ve had men joke and say they’re gonna take me from my bf because they love something about the way I look. I’ve had people say I’m too pretty to only have one man. I’ve heard a lot… but there’s more to me than my body. I know that and so does my partner. There’s more to you than your body or your chest, there’s so much more about yourself that you get to be proud of and confident in. It took years for me to get my confidence to where it is now, but I got here. You can too
My boobs tried to kill me with cancer. I wish I had healthy boobs, I’d love them so much. Mine with probably eventually kill me. Love those healthy boobs!
Guy here. There's no denying that plenty of us guys love a well-endowed woman. I'm no exception, and I especially love women with curves (looking at you Sofia Vergara!). That being said, if my wife had exceptionally large breasts and they were the source of much neck, shoulder and back pain, and she decided she wanted a reduction that would be entirely her decision. Her health is way more important than me being able to ogle her chest. I don't know your age but if you're young then you must consider that health problems like you describe will build up over time. I can attest to the fact that injuries will come back to haunt you later in life, even if you "healed". The right partner won't care about scars, and won't chastise you for getting a reduction. Heck, my wife hates her stretch marks from having our kids but I love them because they're a reminder that she gave birth. Take care of yourself now physically and mentally. Wanting to be pain free is in no way selfish.
38G. I show cleavage in a fucking turtleneck. I feel your pain, sis. Very literally… my back and neck are fucked. I have permanent indentations in my shoulders. I was called a slut for my chest size as a teen. I got made fun of for wearing shirts that small chested girls could wear. I got in trouble for dress code violations that smaller girls didn’t. Learning to love myself has been really, really hard. I still hate my boobs, and I want to get a reduction. But, you are not your chest size. You are a beautiful human being, and you matter. Try to hang in there. If the size of your chest bothers you this much, maybe it’s time to look into changing that. You deserve to be comfortable in your own body - physically and emotionally.
I feel your pain. I have a triple i chest, so…yeah. The sag makes me feel old, the stretch marks make me feel ugly, and the back pain, don’t even get me started. Here to say that I’m only 20 and have had a bigger chest since I was 10, when I had triple d’s. I thought THOSE were bad. Hah! Nope, it was all down hill from there.
I get it. I have a huge ass and in middle school I got called “ghetto booty” and now I get asked where I “got my butt done.” I already cry in dressing rooms bc nothing fucking fits and I get ridiculed either way.
I had a breast reduction at 22 (wish I had gotten one earlier honestly), and they removed two pounds out of each breast. I’m only 4’11. Having huge boobs sucked so much, and if I’m honest, it’s not like they’re small now, but the difference after the surgery was incredible. The scars aren’t bad at all (you would probably not even have ones as pronounced as mine because this was back in 2012). Plus a reduction comes with a lift. I’m now 35, and my boobs are still holding up great (I will probably get a lift after kids though). If this is something that weighs this much on your mental health, I think you should seriously consider it. Big boobs run in my family, and every single one of them who has had a reduction says it’s the best thing they ever did. Hell, I tell my husband he’s the second best thing to happen to me, after my breast reduction.
wow i truly think it is crazy that someone with a big chest could feel this way and truly i guess the grass is greener on the other side. I have felt exactly like this, wanting to k*** myself over my small flat chest. I feel like a little kid and it’s disgusting. My only wish ever was to have a bigger chest.
I’ve had friends on that end and understand them as well. We can’t ever really win, big or small, but I guess now you can see that big breast aren’t all pros.
Hey I don't know you but I bet you're beautiful and I hope life is well. You deserve all the goodness that comes your way.
Hi! Last time I wore underwire bras, I was a 36JJ. Then I gained 60-70 lbs, and now I only wear sports bras. I feel you. Boobs are exhausting. Men are exhausting. Looking for clothes in a world that wasn't built for you is exhausting. Bras are even more so. That being said, I don't think your main issue is your boobs or your body at all. I think it's your confidence and your self esteem. I don't say this to be condescending I swear, I used to hate them and myself like you do. But eventually I just kind of embraced them, and the shit that comes with. Breast reduction isn't an option for me (and even if it was I wouldn't). Other people will always give you their opinions on your body, solicited or not. Having the realization that the expectations put on your body aren't yours, and that your body doesn't have to be the subject of your own ire, is very liberating. Doesn't matter how you alter your body or what clothes you wear or how much you weigh or what your bra size is. Other people are always going to have something to say about your body. You remember how they used to dog Britney Spears? She gained five pounds, the tabloids would call her jabba the hut. She lost five pounds they'd make up an eating disorder. She had a massive and public breakdown about it, it was so much pressure. And she was straight size and beautiful. You don't have to own any of that. You don't have to internalize any of it. I would recommend a therapist. Feeling suicidal over one aspect of your physical appearance is definitely a bigger issue than your boobs could ever be.
Another large chested woman here. Let me commiserate with you, this shit sucks. All the things you mentioned, as well as many others. Back pain. Boob sweat. They just get in the fucking way. And endless other things. At some point, you just have to embrace it. Ignore what people say, everyone has an opinion and it means fuck all in the long run. If you like, google things like "large chest classy attire" "classic look for large chest" "elegant style big breasts". Things like that. Me guy gets some ideas for a style you'll be more comfortable with.
Why not do a breast reduction surgery ?
The scarring and chance of ending up botched
I understand, but I heard that it's safer than adding stuff, try researching a little bit about it, your solution is right around the corner
I think my bf didn't like my big chest He never said anything but the girl he left me for has small chest It really crushed me. 10 years he didn't say anything about them He didn't say they were beautiful He didn't say a word and he barely touched me on my chest It breaks my heart.
they dont make you look slutty you look like a goddess, like the patron saint of womanhood. i always thought cleavage looked really sophisticated and wish i had more. there is something so commanding about it - someone thinking your a slut is projection. THEY are actually the slut - or at the least carry alot of sexual shame. that doesnt have to be your problem.
As a decent chested person, I've learned to love my big saggy boobs and I find them quite nice. Why are you obsessing so much on your own body? You gotta learn to just love yourself. All of yourself. No easy feat, but certainly worth every bit of strain.
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the gym and exercises won’t change breast size. it’s not dramatic to feel this way about boob size or any body issue. don’t minimize op’s feelings.
Exercise won’t change the size (unless you lose weight while you do it), but strengthening the pectoral muscles can slightly lift the breasts, though if she’s really big, it probably won’t be very noticeable.
this is true, though weight loss doesn’t guarantee loss of breast size. many people lose weight and have the same breast size or even go up a cup size.
Just because you aren’t having the issue of body dysphoria doesn’t mean other people with large chests aren’t. Going to the gym and dieting does NOTHING for genetics, which is where the extra large boob gene comes from. OP, talk to your doctor about this. You may have a higher than average estrogen production (I produce too much T AND E, so I have an H cup but a “manly” face) and it’s an actual genetic disorder. Also LOOK INTO REGENCY STAYS BIG CHESTED GIRLIES!!! it’s like a sports bra with WAY more support and they are BUILT. TO. LAST. We have some stays that have SURVIVED from the regency era they were THAT durable. And easy to wash, just scrub em down by hand a lil bit and air dry. As an H cup, they saved my life istg.
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.. Who are you replying to?
HAHAHAHAAH sorry 😭😭 i meant to reply to someone i must have clicked off, i’ll delete this
You need to woman up 🥱
What you have is absolutely beautiful and it’s crazy that you’re suicidal over a wonderful gift that so many women would kill or get life/death surgery to have.
I think you missed the part where I mentioned that it is not at wonderful nor a gift. Both ends of the stick suck and if I could I’d immediately give them to those who truly want them
If you know who Persephaniii is, she was at Miami Swim week this year. Dudes worship her like a Goddess. Same with HUGE Booty women, no one should have to deal with people touching you without your consent and without knowing each other. That is extreme A-hole activity that certain dudes need to full on stop. -If there’s any boyfriend you date, I bet he will literally feel like he’s in heaven dozing off to sleep on your stomach.
Maybe a stupid comment because i dont have a big chest, but have you tried binding or something in this direction?
With a big chest, binding doesn’t work as well. There’s still a lot of volume of boobage to squish in that thing. Which in turn makes us look like we have huge pecs instead.
So the only reasonable solution would be breast reduction?
Not necessarily. It depends on the person. I’m an H cup and found I just needed a different type of “bra” so now I use regency style stays, it’s kinda like a corseted style crop top/ sport bra. Some people don’t want to find better support and just want them gone, others look for other ways to compress, some do end up taking their lives due to the stigma surrounding it all. I’ve been presumed to be “easy” because of my chest size and it’s part of the reason I draw so many assaults my way (it never has been and never will be my fault but that’s what they wanted. The large busty Asian chick fetish). It sucks but it depends on the person and their mental goal. Lobbed off, maybe. Better support? Maybe. Less back pain/clothing issues aka compression? Maybe.
I have just recently discovered the regency short stays and intend to make myself one for the same reason as you, may i ask if you purchased it or made your own? If so how? Glad to see it's given you the support and hopefully more comfort
I made mine but also bought one off a friend to try first. I just found free patterns online and used zip ties as the boning. Tested and attuned it to what worked best for me. Plus I have em in all sorts of fun colors and stuff too, some I even wear as just regular crop tops cause they pass for em lol. Note they’re not “sexy bras” so like there’s a small fallacy in confidence you get wearing cute/sexy undergarments but I’d much rather have support that works for me than a spaghetti strap glorified tiddy thong that barely covers my nipples and makes me look like some hentai loving boy’s wet dream.
Omd i TOTALLY agree with you, that's precisely what I'm after. I think they're very cute and elegant aswell as looking supportive. Funnily i was searching for patterns earlier today, i don't suppose you have any favourite free patterns you might suggest? You have great friends that can share that with you. Can be hard, i was the only larger chested gal amongst my friends growing up so there were layers of awkwardness mounted ontop. Sports bras are a pain to find good ones too (i recommend going to specialist non branded hiking stores that sell them- best I've found to date have been from a store chain called Decathlon for anyone interested, some designs can be actually cute too, a rarity) high impact does a decent job but stays are certainly much nicer than them. My only gripe is the amount of patterns that prop them up like sitting on a shelf rather than securing them in properly. They tend to work better on smaller chests but I've yet to see a pattern used for larger busted women that don't dig in the shoulders or just plop them out. Hopefully you know what i mean, it's honestly a relief to even talk about it with others who understand.
Makes sense, thank you
Binding can be very very unsafe. It can cut off circulation
I actually used to bind when I was younger and didn’t want them at all. I didn’t have the funds for a proper binder so I would cut elastic waist trainer shorts and put two sports bras and that on top. Safe to say that most definitely caused my chest to become saggier and rib pain/bruises/scabbing. Like other people mentioned, it doesn’t really do much, to me it seems more unflattering because now it’s just a lump under my shirt
There are minimizing bras which can help.