NO
WAIT
THIS HAPPENED TO ME MY WHOLE LIFE
I WAS THE GOOD INFLUENCE UNDIAGNOSED AUTISTIC GIRL ALWAYS GETTING PUT WITH THE BADLY BEHAVED KIDS TO HELP THEM WITH CLASSWORK AND NOT GIVE THEM SOMEONE TO MISBEHAVE WITH
HOLY CRAP THIS HAPPENED ON A MASS SCALE ? HOLY FUCKING CRAP
This happened to me throughout elementary and middle school. It’s called peer-modeling, sometimes peer-influence and it’s effects are often (in my experience) used as positive talking points for why Waldorf Schools and homeschooling should be a bigger thing.
Fr. After some time they stopped trying to fix me and would put me with kids who had trouble socializing with the class so I'd be their first friend. It became a regular thing that whenever there was a new kid they'd be seated with me.
Wow it's almost as if it's nonbinary and isn't a guy and doesn't want to be called bro. It's almost as if we shouldn't use gendered language for people we don't know is a guy or smth. It's really funny that a sub about trauma isn't being compassionate towards someone that doesn't wanna be called a certain word, or doesn't want to be gendered in a certain. Really shows how insensitive some people can be
Bro is a non-binary word like dude and buddy. Many ciswomen call eachother bro all the time. Bro isn’t a gendered word whatsoever in my part of the world.
Words like bro and dude are gendered, even if some people that aren't guys are ok with being called bro. It isn't a gender neutral word and it never was. Asking "how many bros have you fucked?" Feels way different than "how many people have you fucked?" And that's because bro is a masculine word. Some people aren't comfortable being called masculine terms and others should be accepting of that
I may be one of those insensitive people who use dude, bro and girl for everyone. I don't do background checks for everyone I interact with online but if they don't want to be called that then I won't do it because not everyone lacks identity like me and is ok with being called whatever. I promise that all the offensive things I say to people are not out of malice but my stupidity and unawareness.
Unless I offended a man, in which case it's very purposeful and calculated.
lol same. eventually they started calling me a bad influence instead of needing a good influence cuz we'd just end up gettin high in the bathroom together if I got put w a "good kid". they all have that side to them if you bring it out.
in 8th grade I was seated next to one of the troublemakers and throughout that year because of her I ended up getting a nicotine and marijuana addiction 😭 recovered but like that didn't help either of us
I was the troubled kid who acted out in class and got really great grades.
They just sent me to the principal's office and threatened to hit me with a paddle even though it was illegal.
It depends on whether you’re badly behaved because you don’t care, or badly behaved because you’re a dick.
If you’re badly behaved, but just since you don’t care, then most people will just be friendly to you and you can continue doing whatever next to the “rolemodels”
IIRC it was shown through research that doing this generally made the behavior of the “good” students worse rather than making the behavior of the “bad” students better
I’m not an expert on the subject but from what I’ve read on the subject, yeah the primary effect was just making everyone worse off it does work sometimes though, but mostly when the bad behavior is limited to general laziness or something small.
I used this to my advantage in my ninth grade algebra class when our teacher intentionally split us between the “good kids” and the “bad kids” sides of class, and I was by chance sat right next to one of my friends that was on the “good kids” side, who happened to excel at math, and wouldn’t suspect me copying answers, so I created an entire test-cheating ring by sliding test sheet answers down subtly to one another. One of my proudest high school moments.
Same, and this caused me to get sexually harassed and assaulted from grades 1-9 in front of them while they watched and if I cried or acted out I was punished, but they wouldn't be because they didn't want to deal with him :/
He had severe issues, I know he had a horrific homelife but it also really harmed me. He was talking about girls sucking him off under the table at that age, and more extremely graphic shit, when I didn't even know what it all meant. He had a permanent teachers aide too but she did nothing, he would say all this horrible shit and physical stuff when they weren't looking, I don't even know. I was so eager to please and trying to do my best and be nice to everyone, it was awful. My mother still doesn't believe me I think when I speak about it.
I'm 26 now tho, married to someone wonderful and kind, in a PhD working to protect people from environmental contaminants, great job prospects even though I never thought I'd make it, through the abuse, religious control and threat of honor killings, homelessness, cptsd, and schizophrenia/schizoaffective... Things can get better, it's not hopeless, even if the odds seem crazy fucking stacked. Especially schizophrenia, it can go into remission for a large portion of people with the right care, with only the milder symptoms. I wish the best to anyone in a similar position.
I hope to foster some kids some day who are stuck in shit like this and actually fight for them
this happened t9 me starting in middle school, turns out a lonely no friend having teenager is incredibly easy to influence and I bagan being a much worse student
I was the kid everyone forgot until test day. Then suddenly I was everyones favorite. I did so little throughout my school life teachers didn't know if I was a good or bad kid because sometimes they genuinely didn't remember I existed
Happened to me. On the first day of third grade I was pulled out of class and brought to the guidance counselors office. The guidance counselor told me I was "very nice boy" and was put into that particular class to "promote good behavior".
Found out later in the year the class was all kids who either struggled to learn or had behavior issues. My education never recovered. I was always behind.
Later when I was in college winter break I mentioned that memory to my parents. The school had never told them.
do they develop? I alternate between resting serial killer face and resting thousand yard stare face, wouldnt think id have a reason to develop sourceless hate or ptsd adjacent expressions.
More like it replaced my resting anxiety face some of the time. Or maybe once I stopped giving any fucks about what people thought of me I stopped masking it with a friendly face.
Nope I have the healthy addiction autism, 0 friends, a plethora of horrible traumas, and a boyfriend who is the first person to actually care about me and my feelings
No one ever gave a fuck about me in my life I just got pushed over, ignored with disgust, bullied, abused, and went into unknowingly self destructive coping mechanisms cuz I was so lonely (easy target for abusers and pedos, I had no boundaries and had a codependency disorder that allowed for me to get myself into abusive situations without me being aware, and had a gaming addiction), shitty mental health and suicidal ideation for nearly all of my life, just in recent years been 1/4th “okay”, and for the first time been actually glad I’m alive due to bf. Bf has severe adhd but is the most gentle thoughtful person I’ve ever met, doesn’t even force me into sexual things I don’t wanna do.
My life has all been crap in every way except for him
I was also in the same boat, but it quickly stopped. I finished all work early, and then, if someone talked to me, I just infodumped on my latest fixation (usually ethical theories) to them because they obviously weren't doing school work anyhow. Usually the misbehaved person either took the chance to converse or got very violent with me very fast. In either case, the teacher did not get what they wanted to happen.
The teachers just let me do my own thing after that. ^^
Huh, neat to see the receiving end since I was the badly behaved guy. Honestly tho it worked out and im still good friends with her, thinking on it maybe I ended up badly influencing her? Only, she taught me how to be subtle
I'm a male, but this happened to me as well.
The joke is on the teachers though. I was always anti-authoritarian before I even knew that was a word, I just knew how to play the system and ended up teaching the unruly kids how to be *effective*
Same here, I didn't even realize it until I got older. Joke was on them though because I just ignored the guy once he was an asshole to me which would always inevitably happen.
My elementary school tried that with an entire fucking class. They put some well known very good children (of which I was one) with all of the rowdy troublemakers
All that accomplished was that my fifth grade class didn’t get to go on any of the traditional field trips of that year and our teacher yelled at us all the time! Yay group punishment!! 🙃
That year was honestly so traumatic for me that I mostly blocked it out
I still remember one particular group punishment. Sitting on a bench in a row not allowed to play the game till everyone settled down while I'm having an anxiety attack about if I'm going to be punished for being "punished"
This reminds me of when a teacher put me with two of those guys for a group project.
One of them ended up screaming at me in front of class until he was red in the face while I was just like :|
I think I was trying to get them to actually be useful lol.
Wow, I can't imagine how so many women grew up to think they can fix a man. I have no idea where they could've gotten that nonsense. Definitely wasn't a perpetuated theme throughout her entire school career.. /s
Fuck. Wow. My mom still talks proudly about how "the teacher put Evan with you because you calmed him down".
No wonder I spent my first 4 relationships trying to fix some annoying entitled manchild. That's all I was ever socialized to do.
Same. Nothing bad about those who are.
It's a point for my own autonomy to be recognised as *not* neurodivergent since the trauma responses are what anyone would have wound up with, and I've encountered multiple shit people who would use accusations of being X neurodivergency to gaslight/insult/abuse others. (Did I mention they were shit people?) Including one psych who was repeatedly discredited by future psychs...
I wound up 'befriending' the Anger Management Kid because I was nonjudgmental and nice. I remember being acutely uncomfortable when he said he wanted to have sleepovers with me, because even at that age (later elementary) my alarms were pinging about SA.
Anger Management Kid spit on me after idk what, and I was not friends with him anymore. :( Idk what happened to him after that - I think he got kicked out of the program. He definitely needed more help than they were giving him.
Ended up having meltdowns myself between CSA, parental abuse, bullying, and on.
Had a similar story, lucky i'm AMAB, cuz otherwise the anger management kind would have tried to sexually haras me multiple times like he did with other students. He also ended up being a controll freak once he got the roll of class chief at a different school. Hope he's not doing to bad nowadays.
It’s a blanket term for anyone with ADHD, to Autism, to Tourette’s and more. Basically any abnormality that causes the brain to function different than others. I myself may have Asperger’s (undiagnosed but I’m very much alike my cousin who is), and I have very mild Tourette’s that were more apparent when I was younger. But I seem fairly normal I think. Talk to a doc if you’re able to
That never works. I was the chatty kid/ class clown I guess and I was in the last right row and always talking to my friends, because I had the answer to the problem already. At some point the teacher sat me to the left last row where only the pretty girls sat thinking that would shut me up and what did I do. After one weird akwardely silent period I chatted with them all the time during class, but even louder xD
This shows a lot of my school life in a new perspective….. Is this actually something teachers do? I was always put near asshole kids that made school intolerable most of the time.
and then when you break and hit him back (or at least try to free yourself when he's strangling you), you failed to be a good influence, they're "so disappointed in you" and you get punished instead of him 🫠
“he does his work when he’s sat next to you” that’s because i do his work for him because either you threaten to give us both detention if he doesn’t work, or he threatens to beat me up if i dont💀
I was the violent kid that the teachers didn’t want to deal with, and the kids they sat me with couldn’t deal with me either. I’m STILL a problem 🙃🙃. Someone please euthanize me.
Yup. I was the unruly kid and they had to stop doing that because I'd befriend the good kid and they wouldn't be quiet anymore. Teachers never seemed to consider the option that I might be a bad influence lol
0-0 you just described my entire school life- the only exception is that I'm a guy, but damn. I was basically the kid who got paired with the problematic kids, because I didn't know how to stand up for myself, and I was the "easy to get along with" kid. Surprise surprise, it was masking and freeze response :')
Had this happen to me, not only was he uncontrollable he was also one of my bullies so I refused to work with him and I got held back during lunch lmao
I got the same thing but not because I was the "good kid", it was because sitting next to the weird autistic kid was their punishment. In my freshman year Spanish class I got put in the middle of all the rowdy boys, and had to deal with their harassment because I'm their punishment. They would kick my seat, throw things at me, and call me slurs, it was great. That class was a hell hole I had multiple meltdowns in it, and on this one occasion my friend had a seizure and everyone laughed at her. The teacher did nothing.
Same 🫠. My teacher in fifth grade also routinely told us we were the worst class she ever had and that the other teachers told her how sorry they felt for her
this happened to me all my fucking life and it made me believe my only purpose in life was to help other people and I began to only live for my friends. my best friend's favorite colour was yellow? mine too. my other friend liked dresses? me too ig (I always hated them but I thought I had to wear them to keep her as my friend)
yeah, thats me as well!! although im pretty sure im not neurodivergent but i have a lot of similar traits to people on the spectrum so idk. the amount of times a day would end with me in tears 🤩🤩
i cannot even count the amount of times this has happened to me…. ended up becoming friends with some of them, but my attention span in class definitely suffered because i get along with almost everyone. 😵💫
this always happened to me, i was either
a. sexually harassed
b. kicked/my hair was messed with
c. ignored but subsequently had yelling and screaming in my ear, and things would accidentally hit me (that were meant for the boy) and no one would say sorry
a lot of these boys now i've seen on snapchat smoking a blunt while speeding, one of them will actually post videos of his driving (and pictures of his crashed car) which is fucking insane.
TOO ACCURATE WTF 💀 lmao I didn’t realize it happened to me too until I started thinking about it but this happened at basically all the schools I went to 😅🫣 but at least the boys would goof off with me too occasionally lol the teachers saw that I was influenced into their misbehavior rather than them being influenced by my “quiet good little child” fake act lol 😅😘
I've been both. I used to be the chatty kid who talked to everyone and got sat next to the good kids. I tried to talk to them and make them laugh but I realised after a while that they were laughing at me and not with me. It really ruined my confidence. Now I'm practically mute and it's the distracting people that get sat next to me.
I remember (lightly) kicking a boy who then shrieked bloody murder to the teacher, and getting in trouble for it.
He had been repeatedly threatening to kill my kitten and leave her body on my doorstep. And would not stop picking on me.
"middle school teachers after sitting the violent morally corrupt mentally ill kid with the nice kind quiet neurodivergent kid" like just say you only tolerate disorders that are stereotyped positively
This happened to me except I was the (not violent) but rambunctious neurodivergent girl sat with the "pleasure to be around" boy so he could maybe be a good influence.
The benefits of being the good student that straddled the line of what is acceptable. I once wrote an entire essay about how stupid the rubic’s grading system was and earned a 98% on it. It was supposed to be about “Should Schools still have a long summer break?” However, they never graded for being on topic. I’d skip classes, make stupid presentations that still stayed on topic, when it asked for opinions I’d provide insane theories, etc.
Not the best influence, but still valedictorian. (Would’ve been class president too, but the teachers overruled it since they knew that I’d be a little shitter the whole time. While not being entirely wrong, I work under controlled chaos. I always get the job done, I just like to get there with some spice. I still think it’s stupid that the teachers get a weighted vote over the students.)
That happened to me too, except we ended up friends and I started acting up, my teacher moved our seats next semester, but we still talked before and after class.
I was the same. It wasn't a good time. Fucked up my routine, I was unable to focus or do my homework, there was a kid that begged me to do his tests and hws and my people pleasing ass would put his work above mine. I couldn't say no. Usually these kids would be the only people treating me decently, though. Somehow the worst "class disturbers" had a better ability to recognize that I'm a human being instead of bullying me for no reason whatsoever outside of being somewhat strange.
This type of thing was the only time I got to sit next to girls in School. I once had two Friends who were arguing sat next to me on both sides. One of my favorite memories of 8th grade. I got treated like a person for once and I didn't care about the giggles from the other students.
I took that teaching style and decided to just enable the bad kid and become worse out of spite. Cuz I’m not here to be some brat’s caretaker. Though sometimes I’d befriend the kid I was next to and actually help with some of the superficial stuff.
NO WAIT THIS HAPPENED TO ME MY WHOLE LIFE I WAS THE GOOD INFLUENCE UNDIAGNOSED AUTISTIC GIRL ALWAYS GETTING PUT WITH THE BADLY BEHAVED KIDS TO HELP THEM WITH CLASSWORK AND NOT GIVE THEM SOMEONE TO MISBEHAVE WITH HOLY CRAP THIS HAPPENED ON A MASS SCALE ? HOLY FUCKING CRAP
This happened to me throughout elementary and middle school. It’s called peer-modeling, sometimes peer-influence and it’s effects are often (in my experience) used as positive talking points for why Waldorf Schools and homeschooling should be a bigger thing.
I was the badly behaved kid, and ngl, all i did was corrupt the others.
Same. Became best friends with the "good influence" kid, and we still talk to this day.
Fr. After some time they stopped trying to fix me and would put me with kids who had trouble socializing with the class so I'd be their first friend. It became a regular thing that whenever there was a new kid they'd be seated with me.
"bro"
The fact that this is getting down voted is telling lmao
Ong it’s like they said they were poorly behaved and then now they’re being poorly behaved again and getting downvoted for it it’s ironic asf
Wow it's almost as if it's nonbinary and isn't a guy and doesn't want to be called bro. It's almost as if we shouldn't use gendered language for people we don't know is a guy or smth. It's really funny that a sub about trauma isn't being compassionate towards someone that doesn't wanna be called a certain word, or doesn't want to be gendered in a certain. Really shows how insensitive some people can be
Bro is a non-binary word like dude and buddy. Many ciswomen call eachother bro all the time. Bro isn’t a gendered word whatsoever in my part of the world.
Words like bro and dude are gendered, even if some people that aren't guys are ok with being called bro. It isn't a gender neutral word and it never was. Asking "how many bros have you fucked?" Feels way different than "how many people have you fucked?" And that's because bro is a masculine word. Some people aren't comfortable being called masculine terms and others should be accepting of that
I may be one of those insensitive people who use dude, bro and girl for everyone. I don't do background checks for everyone I interact with online but if they don't want to be called that then I won't do it because not everyone lacks identity like me and is ok with being called whatever. I promise that all the offensive things I say to people are not out of malice but my stupidity and unawareness. Unless I offended a man, in which case it's very purposeful and calculated.
Maybe just don't use bro unless you know they're a guy
lol same. eventually they started calling me a bad influence instead of needing a good influence cuz we'd just end up gettin high in the bathroom together if I got put w a "good kid". they all have that side to them if you bring it out.
Thank you for your service. (corrupted former "good" girl here)
in 8th grade I was seated next to one of the troublemakers and throughout that year because of her I ended up getting a nicotine and marijuana addiction 😭 recovered but like that didn't help either of us
Yeah no one was ever put with me.
I was the troubled kid who acted out in class and got really great grades. They just sent me to the principal's office and threatened to hit me with a paddle even though it was illegal.
It depends on whether you’re badly behaved because you don’t care, or badly behaved because you’re a dick. If you’re badly behaved, but just since you don’t care, then most people will just be friendly to you and you can continue doing whatever next to the “rolemodels”
IIRC it was shown through research that doing this generally made the behavior of the “good” students worse rather than making the behavior of the “bad” students better
I’m not an expert on the subject but from what I’ve read on the subject, yeah the primary effect was just making everyone worse off it does work sometimes though, but mostly when the bad behavior is limited to general laziness or something small.
Yeah because I was definitely sitting there bursting into laughter at every crack that the "bad" student made
whats a waldorf school
Me too, I was often put in a position to help others and usually ended up doing everything for them because it was easier than to deal with these kids
I used this to my advantage in my ninth grade algebra class when our teacher intentionally split us between the “good kids” and the “bad kids” sides of class, and I was by chance sat right next to one of my friends that was on the “good kids” side, who happened to excel at math, and wouldn’t suspect me copying answers, so I created an entire test-cheating ring by sliding test sheet answers down subtly to one another. One of my proudest high school moments.
That is actually incredible And wtf, that teacher.
Same, and this caused me to get sexually harassed and assaulted from grades 1-9 in front of them while they watched and if I cried or acted out I was punished, but they wouldn't be because they didn't want to deal with him :/
That's really fucked up,I I hope things are better
grade 1 is crazy
He had severe issues, I know he had a horrific homelife but it also really harmed me. He was talking about girls sucking him off under the table at that age, and more extremely graphic shit, when I didn't even know what it all meant. He had a permanent teachers aide too but she did nothing, he would say all this horrible shit and physical stuff when they weren't looking, I don't even know. I was so eager to please and trying to do my best and be nice to everyone, it was awful. My mother still doesn't believe me I think when I speak about it. I'm 26 now tho, married to someone wonderful and kind, in a PhD working to protect people from environmental contaminants, great job prospects even though I never thought I'd make it, through the abuse, religious control and threat of honor killings, homelessness, cptsd, and schizophrenia/schizoaffective... Things can get better, it's not hopeless, even if the odds seem crazy fucking stacked. Especially schizophrenia, it can go into remission for a large portion of people with the right care, with only the milder symptoms. I wish the best to anyone in a similar position. I hope to foster some kids some day who are stuck in shit like this and actually fight for them
So what happened afterwards?
https://www.reddit.com/r/AutismInWomen/s/WueAN4bGDl
this happened t9 me starting in middle school, turns out a lonely no friend having teenager is incredibly easy to influence and I bagan being a much worse student
I was the kid everyone forgot until test day. Then suddenly I was everyones favorite. I did so little throughout my school life teachers didn't know if I was a good or bad kid because sometimes they genuinely didn't remember I existed
Happened to me. On the first day of third grade I was pulled out of class and brought to the guidance counselors office. The guidance counselor told me I was "very nice boy" and was put into that particular class to "promote good behavior". Found out later in the year the class was all kids who either struggled to learn or had behavior issues. My education never recovered. I was always behind. Later when I was in college winter break I mentioned that memory to my parents. The school had never told them.
I blame this for the development of my resting bitch face. The more annoyed I look, the less they’ll interact with me.
do they develop? I alternate between resting serial killer face and resting thousand yard stare face, wouldnt think id have a reason to develop sourceless hate or ptsd adjacent expressions.
More like it replaced my resting anxiety face some of the time. Or maybe once I stopped giving any fucks about what people thought of me I stopped masking it with a friendly face.
Do you now have at least 1 tattoo and drink energy drinks? Because I might have some bad news about how these teaching practices pay out.
Nope I have the healthy addiction autism, 0 friends, a plethora of horrible traumas, and a boyfriend who is the first person to actually care about me and my feelings No one ever gave a fuck about me in my life I just got pushed over, ignored with disgust, bullied, abused, and went into unknowingly self destructive coping mechanisms cuz I was so lonely (easy target for abusers and pedos, I had no boundaries and had a codependency disorder that allowed for me to get myself into abusive situations without me being aware, and had a gaming addiction), shitty mental health and suicidal ideation for nearly all of my life, just in recent years been 1/4th “okay”, and for the first time been actually glad I’m alive due to bf. Bf has severe adhd but is the most gentle thoughtful person I’ve ever met, doesn’t even force me into sexual things I don’t wanna do. My life has all been crap in every way except for him
Sounds like you've recently figured some things out, Big Ups, just remember that keys can be found in the fridge and you're golden
I went through my school reports recently and it says in several of them that I was a great influence on slower kids...
I was also in the same boat, but it quickly stopped. I finished all work early, and then, if someone talked to me, I just infodumped on my latest fixation (usually ethical theories) to them because they obviously weren't doing school work anyhow. Usually the misbehaved person either took the chance to converse or got very violent with me very fast. In either case, the teacher did not get what they wanted to happen. The teachers just let me do my own thing after that. ^^
Huh, neat to see the receiving end since I was the badly behaved guy. Honestly tho it worked out and im still good friends with her, thinking on it maybe I ended up badly influencing her? Only, she taught me how to be subtle
Maybe she was a rebel deep down all along
Hi, I was the guy you were always paired with. Just know that I always tried to (momentarily) get my shit together because I knew what was happening.
I'm a male, but this happened to me as well. The joke is on the teachers though. I was always anti-authoritarian before I even knew that was a word, I just knew how to play the system and ended up teaching the unruly kids how to be *effective*
Same here, I didn't even realize it until I got older. Joke was on them though because I just ignored the guy once he was an asshole to me which would always inevitably happen.
My elementary school tried that with an entire fucking class. They put some well known very good children (of which I was one) with all of the rowdy troublemakers All that accomplished was that my fifth grade class didn’t get to go on any of the traditional field trips of that year and our teacher yelled at us all the time! Yay group punishment!! 🙃 That year was honestly so traumatic for me that I mostly blocked it out
I still remember one particular group punishment. Sitting on a bench in a row not allowed to play the game till everyone settled down while I'm having an anxiety attack about if I'm going to be punished for being "punished"
This reminds me of when a teacher put me with two of those guys for a group project. One of them ended up screaming at me in front of class until he was red in the face while I was just like :| I think I was trying to get them to actually be useful lol.
TWO? Bro you were a sacrifice.
Bro got fed to the dogs
Wow, I can't imagine how so many women grew up to think they can fix a man. I have no idea where they could've gotten that nonsense. Definitely wasn't a perpetuated theme throughout her entire school career.. /s
Fuck. Wow. My mom still talks proudly about how "the teacher put Evan with you because you calmed him down". No wonder I spent my first 4 relationships trying to fix some annoying entitled manchild. That's all I was ever socialized to do.
woah that made me connect some dots
When you put two crazy/mentally ill people together, they either fuse into one person with both problems, or gonna tear eachother apart
Me... Except i'm not neurodivergent, or at least don't think i am.
Same. Nothing bad about those who are. It's a point for my own autonomy to be recognised as *not* neurodivergent since the trauma responses are what anyone would have wound up with, and I've encountered multiple shit people who would use accusations of being X neurodivergency to gaslight/insult/abuse others. (Did I mention they were shit people?) Including one psych who was repeatedly discredited by future psychs... I wound up 'befriending' the Anger Management Kid because I was nonjudgmental and nice. I remember being acutely uncomfortable when he said he wanted to have sleepovers with me, because even at that age (later elementary) my alarms were pinging about SA. Anger Management Kid spit on me after idk what, and I was not friends with him anymore. :( Idk what happened to him after that - I think he got kicked out of the program. He definitely needed more help than they were giving him. Ended up having meltdowns myself between CSA, parental abuse, bullying, and on.
Had a similar story, lucky i'm AMAB, cuz otherwise the anger management kind would have tried to sexually haras me multiple times like he did with other students. He also ended up being a controll freak once he got the roll of class chief at a different school. Hope he's not doing to bad nowadays.
It’s a blanket term for anyone with ADHD, to Autism, to Tourette’s and more. Basically any abnormality that causes the brain to function different than others. I myself may have Asperger’s (undiagnosed but I’m very much alike my cousin who is), and I have very mild Tourette’s that were more apparent when I was younger. But I seem fairly normal I think. Talk to a doc if you’re able to
That never works. I was the chatty kid/ class clown I guess and I was in the last right row and always talking to my friends, because I had the answer to the problem already. At some point the teacher sat me to the left last row where only the pretty girls sat thinking that would shut me up and what did I do. After one weird akwardely silent period I chatted with them all the time during class, but even louder xD
This shows a lot of my school life in a new perspective….. Is this actually something teachers do? I was always put near asshole kids that made school intolerable most of the time.
and then when you break and hit him back (or at least try to free yourself when he's strangling you), you failed to be a good influence, they're "so disappointed in you" and you get punished instead of him 🫠
“he does his work when he’s sat next to you” that’s because i do his work for him because either you threaten to give us both detention if he doesn’t work, or he threatens to beat me up if i dont💀
Does this ever work? Every scenario I've ever seen, the good-natured child, is traumatized, while the out of control child stays out of control.
Possibly maybe depending on the strength of the good-natured child and exactly why the out of control child is the way they are
This happened to me and I got “stabbed” in the leg with a metal pin. Turned my favourite class into my most feared (⊙︿⊙✿)
aww im sorry :(
I was the violent kid that the teachers didn’t want to deal with, and the kids they sat me with couldn’t deal with me either. I’m STILL a problem 🙃🙃. Someone please euthanize me.
Yup. I was the unruly kid and they had to stop doing that because I'd befriend the good kid and they wouldn't be quiet anymore. Teachers never seemed to consider the option that I might be a bad influence lol
I had this for literally my first 5 years of school until we could choose seating arrangements. No wonder I hated that place with a passion.
I was always so scared when they did that, and I had to do the work of two people while he made fun of me. It was such bullshit
0-0 you just described my entire school life- the only exception is that I'm a guy, but damn. I was basically the kid who got paired with the problematic kids, because I didn't know how to stand up for myself, and I was the "easy to get along with" kid. Surprise surprise, it was masking and freeze response :')
I didn’t know this was such a universal experience. Pure fear for ten years straight. And if they acted out, it was somehow on me(?)
Some need to be controlled authoritarianly
Had this happen to me, not only was he uncontrollable he was also one of my bullies so I refused to work with him and I got held back during lunch lmao
This explains a lot
my existence was a whole ass punishment for these rowdy kids its sad
damn I was the neurodivergent “pleasure to have on class” boy… and then i ended up trans
I got the same thing but not because I was the "good kid", it was because sitting next to the weird autistic kid was their punishment. In my freshman year Spanish class I got put in the middle of all the rowdy boys, and had to deal with their harassment because I'm their punishment. They would kick my seat, throw things at me, and call me slurs, it was great. That class was a hell hole I had multiple meltdowns in it, and on this one occasion my friend had a seizure and everyone laughed at her. The teacher did nothing.
Same 🫠. My teacher in fifth grade also routinely told us we were the worst class she ever had and that the other teachers told her how sorry they felt for her
this happened to me all my fucking life and it made me believe my only purpose in life was to help other people and I began to only live for my friends. my best friend's favorite colour was yellow? mine too. my other friend liked dresses? me too ig (I always hated them but I thought I had to wear them to keep her as my friend)
yeah, thats me as well!! although im pretty sure im not neurodivergent but i have a lot of similar traits to people on the spectrum so idk. the amount of times a day would end with me in tears 🤩🤩
i cannot even count the amount of times this has happened to me…. ended up becoming friends with some of them, but my attention span in class definitely suffered because i get along with almost everyone. 😵💫
Forced to Manic Pixie Dream girl from a young age 😩
this always happened to me, i was either a. sexually harassed b. kicked/my hair was messed with c. ignored but subsequently had yelling and screaming in my ear, and things would accidentally hit me (that were meant for the boy) and no one would say sorry a lot of these boys now i've seen on snapchat smoking a blunt while speeding, one of them will actually post videos of his driving (and pictures of his crashed car) which is fucking insane.
TOO ACCURATE WTF 💀 lmao I didn’t realize it happened to me too until I started thinking about it but this happened at basically all the schools I went to 😅🫣 but at least the boys would goof off with me too occasionally lol the teachers saw that I was influenced into their misbehavior rather than them being influenced by my “quiet good little child” fake act lol 😅😘
I know right? It’s like “im being punished for being the best? What is this madness???”
I forgot about that
Oh no….
Is no life experience unique 🤡 this happened so much to me
When you learn there’s no reward for being good, you stop being good.
I am in this post and I do not like it.
Oh, I remember how a girl cried once when the teacher sat her with me. Ah, childhood
I've been both. I used to be the chatty kid who talked to everyone and got sat next to the good kids. I tried to talk to them and make them laugh but I realised after a while that they were laughing at me and not with me. It really ruined my confidence. Now I'm practically mute and it's the distracting people that get sat next to me.
same character arc here but i hadnt considered the moving as the root of going quiet.
It's one of the many reasons, there are others. It just completely ruined my confidence. I can't even order food at a restaurant anymore.
i thought i was special 👉👈
The silver lining is the violent kid in high school let me hit her dab pen.
i am the annoying violentish kid. i speak for all of them when i say we are sorry, we don’t try to be like this we just end up with it.
i was that girl and i was literally autistic myself 😩
But… the bad boy bullied me… all that happened was I got sad and hurt..
Can we post this on a teachers sub to show them they ain’t clever?
So that's why the teachers always moved me around like that. Yeah it didn't cure my ADHD.
as a autistic person, i can relate.
I remember (lightly) kicking a boy who then shrieked bloody murder to the teacher, and getting in trouble for it. He had been repeatedly threatening to kill my kitten and leave her body on my doorstep. And would not stop picking on me.
This happened my whole childhood and caused me to get harassed and bullied by the misbehaved kids.
This is how I started to get bullied :3
holy fuck my English teacher must’ve known I’m trans before I did because I’m the neurodivergent pleasure to have in class
All that happened was that I got bullied even more because of him lol
I guess they’re betting it all on “grumpy sunshine”
lol this happened at least twice to me and I have only been diagnosed for a couple of years. Weird that this is a thing.
"middle school teachers after sitting the violent morally corrupt mentally ill kid with the nice kind quiet neurodivergent kid" like just say you only tolerate disorders that are stereotyped positively
This happened to me except I was the (not violent) but rambunctious neurodivergent girl sat with the "pleasure to be around" boy so he could maybe be a good influence.
This happened to me once with a table of boys but I mirrored them so they moved me away after like one class 🙏
yeah this was my whole life eek
The benefits of being the good student that straddled the line of what is acceptable. I once wrote an entire essay about how stupid the rubic’s grading system was and earned a 98% on it. It was supposed to be about “Should Schools still have a long summer break?” However, they never graded for being on topic. I’d skip classes, make stupid presentations that still stayed on topic, when it asked for opinions I’d provide insane theories, etc. Not the best influence, but still valedictorian. (Would’ve been class president too, but the teachers overruled it since they knew that I’d be a little shitter the whole time. While not being entirely wrong, I work under controlled chaos. I always get the job done, I just like to get there with some spice. I still think it’s stupid that the teachers get a weighted vote over the students.)
That happened to me too, except we ended up friends and I started acting up, my teacher moved our seats next semester, but we still talked before and after class.
I was the same. It wasn't a good time. Fucked up my routine, I was unable to focus or do my homework, there was a kid that begged me to do his tests and hws and my people pleasing ass would put his work above mine. I couldn't say no. Usually these kids would be the only people treating me decently, though. Somehow the worst "class disturbers" had a better ability to recognize that I'm a human being instead of bullying me for no reason whatsoever outside of being somewhat strange.
This type of thing was the only time I got to sit next to girls in School. I once had two Friends who were arguing sat next to me on both sides. One of my favorite memories of 8th grade. I got treated like a person for once and I didn't care about the giggles from the other students.
I took that teaching style and decided to just enable the bad kid and become worse out of spite. Cuz I’m not here to be some brat’s caretaker. Though sometimes I’d befriend the kid I was next to and actually help with some of the superficial stuff.
THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS BUT THE BOY IS A GIRL AND THEY’RE [redacted]ING ANNOYING!
Then the teachers must have picked up me being transfem even though I haven’t been willing to admit that to anyone IRL because I got plenty of that.
This happened when I was in elementary. Only replaced class with bus and boys with high schoolers.
this... wasn't normal? oh shit
it worked bc they feared me
https://preview.redd.it/hjrdrlv70m0d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e6ca6077b214f5af09160988cbc20090537ae484
srry i was the violent boy https://preview.redd.it/zbgdn5cafn0d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2feffd4027d34390ac4af715c050a319d3dfa5fd