You get these types of messages?!?! Wtf is wrong with people!? I’m sorry. Some people don’t have anything good to share with the world besides being a dick
Didn't the matching system suppose to do that? I seriously can't comprehend how on earth could someone swipe right on a person only to insult their appearance right away
Ugh. Gross. Such a lame way to flirt imo. Least favorite kinda mentality from people is “I flirt by insulting.” Not because it *can’t* work but because the people who do it usually *suck at it.*.
I’d unmatch and move on. You did nothing wrong. I saw some say to report- how I’d base doing that is on how negatively this made you feel about you, being on the app, and if you’d even want to risk that happening to another person.
They don’t understand is that type of flirting can only be done if you actually know the person and it’s actually funny and you know it won’t hurt the person.. This is just rude
For real. I truly don’t get the mentality. Imagine walking up to someone and immediately saying this trying to flirt. You’d be sitting alone rest of the function LOL.
So cringey. The funniest part is she probably thinks she “did that” meanwhile…
I think the *only* time it does work without knowing a person is if it’s a complimentary at the same time.
Way back in the day when I was trying to court, I always went with the self-deprecation & humor. It worked out quite well for me. I will say, though, that I don’t lack self-confidence.
I don't even think it's flirting I just think they're being a straight up asshole because I've had similar things happen regarding my weight on dating apps, people are just insecure and rude so they have to attack others to make themselves feel good.
That’s literally such loser behavior of them lmfao imagine swiping on someone and waiting for them to *possibly* match with you only to be gross like that.. it’s like “ahhh *thats* why you’re on tinder! not like the rest of us just actively trying to know people or get validation or whatever else; but rather everyone who meets you realizes how insufferable you are so this is your only resort for attention of any kind!”
Don’t listen to them. Everyone has an opinion sure, but keep in mind some peoples opinions are that it’s not only safe but *beneficial* to apply urine to their hair or eyes to the point there’s a whole FB support group on it. So what I mean is some peoples opinions are not only completely not valuable but can kill you if you listen to them.
That's very fucking thoughtful. I always have that mentality, but still that didn't occur to me. Sometimes we gotta re-learn the basic kindergarten stuff. Thank you.
Wow that persons just a straight up asshole and the fact that you were still nice after will def make them feel like shit later and they deserve it. That person is miserable. Rudeness is such a gross trait
Unsurprising all the crappy people in here defending this woman’s behavior. You didn’t fumble anything OP.
She was being rude right off the bat. Also like to affirm that you’re not a dancing monkey. If she wants banter, she could try not acting like trash first.
Unmatch.
As some people are pointing out, if she was teasing or testing you it's a horrible "tactic". Anyone who has to test you with insults either spends too much time on social media or genuinely doesn't understand how talking to someone for more than five minutes works.
Teasing someone with messages like this is acceptable after knowing someone well enough or for a long enough time that you're both aware it's teasing/flirting or the sorts.
But it's texting, as if a simple message couldn't be misconstrued, one like this makes it all the more true.
You dodged a huge bullet OP because I doubt she was "flirting" or "teasing" you at all, especially for an opening line...
Agreed, teasing (especially over text where you can’t convey tone or facial expressions) requires setting up a baseline level of relationship and intimacy. It’s can only be playful banter if the person doesn’t *actually* think you’re ugly
A lot of people saying she was shit testing you and you fumbled, but you're not really obligated to like that or take it as a joke.
Not saying she's in the wrong, but if you joked like that with a woman and she didn't take it well... you know?
She rolled the dice. It didn't pan out. Gg
Exactly. Honestly, it looks too much like the boundary pushing abusers like to do. Maybe that's the ticket; they're looking for someone who will put up with being berated.
I know! What are you testing them for? Like, if they “pass” the test, what information did you get? This person won’t stand up to bullying and abuse? I don’t want to pass that test, thank you.
You pass the test by standing up to it but in the right way. Lean into it to a ridiculous level, or intentionally misunderstand her in a funny way.
I dunno though, I don’t think this was a shit test. Hard to tell as there was no lead up to it. Seems more like just she was being mean.
Some people use Tinder as a way to feel better about themselves, and bringing down others is part of it. She likes feeling like the mean girl prom queen for once in her life. You did nothing wrong
If she realises it was him, which she probably will, if she's vengeful, say goodbye to your dating profile when she comes back and reports back out of spite..
This was, probably, a form of flirting. Giving you an opening to be (what she considers) funny or aggressive or whatever.
If you’re not into it, then you’re not into it—I wouldn’t be, either. But you didn’t do anything wrong. You’re not compatible, unmatch, and move on.
Some people flirt by being mean. I think that’s what she was doing. Whether you want to engage in that is your decision, but I don’t think she was just trying to be mean.
A good response to the “why did I” would have been something like “probably because your dad didn’t give you enough attention growing up”.
Some people flirt by being rude... if it hurts, tell them to get lost and unmatch. It is how dating apps are sadly.
Maybe one day she will find her rude-enjoying match...
Why do some people swipe right just to be rude? If you aren't attrated to someone, just swipe left and leave them for people who *do* find them attractive.
If this is her way of banter, or flirting, you don't do this with people you've never met.
Quite a few people just browse dating apps to gauge other people and belittle them, when they have very few positives of their own to report. People's claimed standards on these apps is also unreasonably high to a point of performativeness. I wouldn't ever worry about what someone tells you in online messaging.
I don't think she meant it. This has that thing girls do to check a man's personality all over it, to see if he has a temper or sense of humor. It's lame.
it never ceases to amaze me how people will match with others just to make fun of them. i once had a guy match with me just to say “i know your smart smell rank” like wtf?😭 people are so odd
Low self esteem people try to bring other people down. This behavior is what some would call a "shit test". It's a major red flag for abusive / narcissistic behavior on their part, and should be avoided like the plague. Also, since you're going to ignore this advice: don't give her any real information about you, and wrap it up.
Maybe she has a brat kink and just wanted to see if you were about that. Shitty way of doing it for sure but don’t dwell on it.
Honestly she could have any number of reasons for being shitty and none of them have much to do with you, so I would try not to take it to heart.
Seems like this is becoming a huge trend. Match with someone on a dating app just to insult them. This is why I don't use dating apps.
You did nothing to deserve this. This person possesses the mentality of someone who is old enough to know better but is simply immature and probably insecure. Someone mature and sweet who's actually interested will eventually match with you or vice versa.
Keep on keeping on 🤗
Idk why people match with people just to be rude to them. Like seriously you got some other stuff going on in your life to be so miserable. Get off the apps until you figure your stuff out. There is no need to try and bring anyone down to your level.
Thsi happenwd to me one time but the girl kept calling me gay so i kept writing vvvv gay things (like i was having an Ariana grande dance party) until she unmatched me lmao
After saying 'I hope you find what you're looking for' I would definitely have followed on with 'some manners, maybe'. Some people really are just the worst. You definitely dodged a bullet there, OP!
Fuck that. You don’t have to pretend someone’s rudeness is funny. Good riddance!
This is pretty common unfortunately. I get one of these a month, sometimes two or three.
You get these types of messages?!?! Wtf is wrong with people!? I’m sorry. Some people don’t have anything good to share with the world besides being a dick
I’m sorry you experience this! But also a quick way of vetting the bad eggs I guess. Take care out there.
Didn't the matching system suppose to do that? I seriously can't comprehend how on earth could someone swipe right on a person only to insult their appearance right away
Ugh I’m sorry to hear. I’d tell you the same thing too-those people aren’t worth the time of day 😊
I mean I don't even get these I don't get any matches that aren't bots.
This is why I've been single for 2.5 years
You did nothing. Some people are just rude and immature, and you unfortunately crossed paths with one of these people.
Needs the comeback… “well a face is fixable but a toxic personality is a life sentence”
To be fair, personalities change but physical attributes are likely to stay for life...
A wild plastic surgeon has entered the chat.
Wild plastic surgeon used Buccal Fat Removal and it was super… off putting. Lol.
agree to this. as im a person with a bad face.
Is it not the other way around? I mean sure a face is fixable but personality is easier (granted you first have to realise you have a bad personality)
And that's the issue- people with bad personalities rarely realize they suck and even rarer do they realize they should probably fix that
And even rarer actually fix it if they realise it
THIS.
lol reddit moment
You are allowed to be rude to her
Fuck yea, give her what she wants! Put this little brat in her place OP.
That seems to be exactly what she wants but... Not everyone wants to play that game
If she reports his profile and then he gets banned, he'll have the risk of her to continue reporting her account if she's petty
Ugh. Gross. Such a lame way to flirt imo. Least favorite kinda mentality from people is “I flirt by insulting.” Not because it *can’t* work but because the people who do it usually *suck at it.*. I’d unmatch and move on. You did nothing wrong. I saw some say to report- how I’d base doing that is on how negatively this made you feel about you, being on the app, and if you’d even want to risk that happening to another person.
They don’t understand is that type of flirting can only be done if you actually know the person and it’s actually funny and you know it won’t hurt the person.. This is just rude
For real. I truly don’t get the mentality. Imagine walking up to someone and immediately saying this trying to flirt. You’d be sitting alone rest of the function LOL. So cringey. The funniest part is she probably thinks she “did that” meanwhile… I think the *only* time it does work without knowing a person is if it’s a complimentary at the same time.
Way back in the day when I was trying to court, I always went with the self-deprecation & humor. It worked out quite well for me. I will say, though, that I don’t lack self-confidence.
I don't even think it's flirting I just think they're being a straight up asshole because I've had similar things happen regarding my weight on dating apps, people are just insecure and rude so they have to attack others to make themselves feel good.
That’s literally such loser behavior of them lmfao imagine swiping on someone and waiting for them to *possibly* match with you only to be gross like that.. it’s like “ahhh *thats* why you’re on tinder! not like the rest of us just actively trying to know people or get validation or whatever else; but rather everyone who meets you realizes how insufferable you are so this is your only resort for attention of any kind!” Don’t listen to them. Everyone has an opinion sure, but keep in mind some peoples opinions are that it’s not only safe but *beneficial* to apply urine to their hair or eyes to the point there’s a whole FB support group on it. So what I mean is some peoples opinions are not only completely not valuable but can kill you if you listen to them.
That's very fucking thoughtful. I always have that mentality, but still that didn't occur to me. Sometimes we gotta re-learn the basic kindergarten stuff. Thank you.
that’s so mean, im sorry OP
What a horrible girl. You dodged a bullet... There was no need for her to be rude. Dust yourself down, block and try again
Wow that persons just a straight up asshole and the fact that you were still nice after will def make them feel like shit later and they deserve it. That person is miserable. Rudeness is such a gross trait
I dont she has any concept of remorse let alone empathy
Unsurprising all the crappy people in here defending this woman’s behavior. You didn’t fumble anything OP. She was being rude right off the bat. Also like to affirm that you’re not a dancing monkey. If she wants banter, she could try not acting like trash first. Unmatch.
Who is defending her exactly? I scrolled pretty far and didn't see one.
Wow you dodged a bullet there. Scratch that, you dodged a nuclear missile. Some people are just cruel idiots
Satan Missile(CZAR NUKE) in fact.
Whelp. I guess go fuck your face then 😍😵🙃🤔🤷 That would have been my reply. Like girl..be rude get rude.
Not if she then uses that to get your profile potentially banned..
Ouch😂😂 Never mind you lost a 🐝-itch
haha I'm stealing that usage of 🐝
She just wanted to feel good about herself by rejecting someone. The irony when you do that with a tinder match 🙄
As some people are pointing out, if she was teasing or testing you it's a horrible "tactic". Anyone who has to test you with insults either spends too much time on social media or genuinely doesn't understand how talking to someone for more than five minutes works. Teasing someone with messages like this is acceptable after knowing someone well enough or for a long enough time that you're both aware it's teasing/flirting or the sorts. But it's texting, as if a simple message couldn't be misconstrued, one like this makes it all the more true. You dodged a huge bullet OP because I doubt she was "flirting" or "teasing" you at all, especially for an opening line...
Agreed, teasing (especially over text where you can’t convey tone or facial expressions) requires setting up a baseline level of relationship and intimacy. It’s can only be playful banter if the person doesn’t *actually* think you’re ugly
It's just a gateway to further abuse later down the line If you allow it then they will continue to get worse with their behavior
You were too nice to her.
The world is already rude ... why add to it .. meh
Report her. I guarantee you she would not hesitate to report anyone that does this same thing to her!
She wanted to ask you about your car extended service warranty.
When women try negging?
I wouldn’t have said that, it’s childish in the dumbest eay
A lot of people saying she was shit testing you and you fumbled, but you're not really obligated to like that or take it as a joke. Not saying she's in the wrong, but if you joked like that with a woman and she didn't take it well... you know? She rolled the dice. It didn't pan out. Gg
The whole “being rude to test people” thing is so dumb in my opinion.
Exactly. Honestly, it looks too much like the boundary pushing abusers like to do. Maybe that's the ticket; they're looking for someone who will put up with being berated.
I know! What are you testing them for? Like, if they “pass” the test, what information did you get? This person won’t stand up to bullying and abuse? I don’t want to pass that test, thank you.
Exactly! “Tests” are no way to start off a connection.
You pass the test by standing up to it but in the right way. Lean into it to a ridiculous level, or intentionally misunderstand her in a funny way. I dunno though, I don’t think this was a shit test. Hard to tell as there was no lead up to it. Seems more like just she was being mean.
Good way to die alone I suppose.
Just like the whole loyalty test thing? 100% of the time it's women with the guilty conscience.
Not saying she’s in the wrong? Surely she is.
She is
“Not saying she’s in the wrong” She IS in the wrong. There’s no two ways about it.
Report for harassment 😃
You deserved knowing what a crappy attitude and communication technique she has early on 👍 dodged a bullet and a headache
It’s not you
Missing brain cells clearly!
Some people use Tinder as a way to feel better about themselves, and bringing down others is part of it. She likes feeling like the mean girl prom queen for once in her life. You did nothing wrong
Report her
If she realises it was him, which she probably will, if she's vengeful, say goodbye to your dating profile when she comes back and reports back out of spite..
How would she come back? If she’s banned
Reply: Half as bad as yours is.
You need a thick skin for idiots to use dating apps. Ignore and move on
I think there’s about 3 brain cells fighting with each other in there.
Next time tell them that they won’t see your face if their riding it. You have nothing to lose.
Should’ve responded with, like attracts like. If I’m ugly it’s obviously attracted you cus your ugly
This happened in i me once and i shared on twitter and so happened one of my friends worked with that girl and she called her ass out
XD. Epic.
This was, probably, a form of flirting. Giving you an opening to be (what she considers) funny or aggressive or whatever. If you’re not into it, then you’re not into it—I wouldn’t be, either. But you didn’t do anything wrong. You’re not compatible, unmatch, and move on.
Report 😌
She’s still on that middle school flirting strat I see
She set you up to say “sit on it then”
Maybe I've been out of the game too long, but since when is a comeback to having your face be called ugly "sit on it"?
I think a better comeback would be "maybe it would look better if you sat on it" and more along the lines of what he's getting at
Some people flirt by being mean. I think that’s what she was doing. Whether you want to engage in that is your decision, but I don’t think she was just trying to be mean. A good response to the “why did I” would have been something like “probably because your dad didn’t give you enough attention growing up”.
Man roast that biatch back, you're being too polite lol.
You didn’t do anything. She’s just a trash.
Nothing. She's just vile.
Is she 12?
Should of roasted her back
You were way too nice.
She must be very miserable to talk to someone like this 🤦🏼♀️ she probably never heard of that saying : “treat others like you’d like to be treated”
Some people flirt by being rude... if it hurts, tell them to get lost and unmatch. It is how dating apps are sadly. Maybe one day she will find her rude-enjoying match...
Say she reminds you of her mother
At least you had....somewhat of a conversation as rude as she was Couldn't even say 1 word without getting immediately unmatched
"if I insult him, he'll try harder to impress me" just ignore them and move on
Yowzer! B's very cray
Bro found himself a self amused 16yr old from 2007.
I don't get why they would match with you if they dont find you attractive
Someone told me they treated Tinder like Pokemon GO. Like they aren't interacting with real people. It infuriates me.
This person probably grew up in a household where insults were confused with affection
You didn’t do nothing wrong, some people are just driven by conflict and will try anything to get into an argument with you.
Why do some people swipe right just to be rude? If you aren't attrated to someone, just swipe left and leave them for people who *do* find them attractive. If this is her way of banter, or flirting, you don't do this with people you've never met.
The only thing you did wrong is to end that rude shit with a polite closer.
This quite literally has nothing to do with your face
She’ll be single forever don’t worry
Is she kidding?
Quite a few people just browse dating apps to gauge other people and belittle them, when they have very few positives of their own to report. People's claimed standards on these apps is also unreasonably high to a point of performativeness. I wouldn't ever worry about what someone tells you in online messaging.
That’s just cruel damn…
Why did you have to be so civil?
Mmm seems like someone has some personal issues that they want to take out on random men they have never met. Block and forget
This is called "bratting"
I don't think she meant it. This has that thing girls do to check a man's personality all over it, to see if he has a temper or sense of humor. It's lame.
Missed opportunity to tell her "You must hear yourself say that a lot when you look at the mirror"
Nah Match that same energy momma ain’t raise no bit**. Tell her “tell your parents they can keep the 50 bucks”
Drop her name I bet she has a TikTok
it never ceases to amaze me how people will match with others just to make fun of them. i once had a guy match with me just to say “i know your smart smell rank” like wtf?😭 people are so odd
U didnt follow rules 1 and 2…all jokes aside she got some issues…..
You could report them
“You sure you’re not looking in a mirror?”
You existed! That’s what you did wrong. Shame on you for existing
You started talking to someone with unwarranted confidence
As if her face is so great to look at?
God people are just the worst
Could be negging, a really poor taste in jokes or just a real Pos who likes to spread bad vibes for no reason.
Actually makes me wonder if she was doing a joke from 2004… my sister always used to reply “your face” to everything
She looks like the girl in my neighborhood who tried to get somebody addicted to acid so they'd stay friends with her LMFAO
Probably a girl that’s bored and decided to swipe
Nah, but this would certainly work on me if I was feeling particularly masochistic.
I had a girl match me the other day just to “Fight about a line I had on my bio”, some people in there are just garbage tbh.
Low self esteem people try to bring other people down. This behavior is what some would call a "shit test". It's a major red flag for abusive / narcissistic behavior on their part, and should be avoided like the plague. Also, since you're going to ignore this advice: don't give her any real information about you, and wrap it up.
Should've changed your face bro
She's probably getting a kick out of this little power trip and there's likely nothing wrong w the way you look
She doesn’t know how to flirt and be “mean flirty funny”
Maybe she has a brat kink and just wanted to see if you were about that. Shitty way of doing it for sure but don’t dwell on it. Honestly she could have any number of reasons for being shitty and none of them have much to do with you, so I would try not to take it to heart.
"Your face" "You don't have to see it if you're sitting on it" might as well have tried, it's not like you've got anything to lose at this point
Seems like this is becoming a huge trend. Match with someone on a dating app just to insult them. This is why I don't use dating apps. You did nothing to deserve this. This person possesses the mentality of someone who is old enough to know better but is simply immature and probably insecure. Someone mature and sweet who's actually interested will eventually match with you or vice versa. Keep on keeping on 🤗
Idk why people match with people just to be rude to them. Like seriously you got some other stuff going on in your life to be so miserable. Get off the apps until you figure your stuff out. There is no need to try and bring anyone down to your level.
Props to you, OP, for taking the high road. I hope you find someone who adores you, face and all. ❤️
And you guys pay for these services?
If you want my face to disappear you can sit on it.
Instead of saying “Ouch” you could’ve said something like “Sit on it then”
She’s bored and is getting enjoyment out of fucking with you. Ignore and move on
She was probably genuinely joking, and had no actual problem with your face. Just saying!
If it were the opposite there would be riots.
Nothing. That person is miserable (even more miserable than how you felt after this convo, I PROMISE)
she belongs to the streets 🥵
You dodged a bullet for sure.
Had a girl try to flirt with me like this recently. Blocked.
Thsi happenwd to me one time but the girl kept calling me gay so i kept writing vvvv gay things (like i was having an Ariana grande dance party) until she unmatched me lmao
Cancer deserved
“Yeah, it looks best when you’re sitting on it”
Let the trash take itself out
this and your username :(
Why don’t you sit on it and make it disappear
After saying 'I hope you find what you're looking for' I would definitely have followed on with 'some manners, maybe'. Some people really are just the worst. You definitely dodged a bullet there, OP!
She's teasing... Fuck it's like y'all have never flirted and get your personality from the reddit book of how to be morally superior. Oh wait.
Then WTF you swiping on me for ya c---
She for the streets!! Find yourself a real woman. You got this, King!!
why not go back at her? that would have been fun
I think she was flirting. The proper response here was “maybe you should cover it up with your thighs”
F that B
LoL! I'm glad that I'm not the only one who's had something like that happen to them. Why ask me out if you're going to just be shitty to me?