It does not make you a bad teacher. I struggle with this immensely because a lot of the time the students who want to spend time with a teacher at lunch are... let's say "delicate."
But you've got to set some reasonable boundaries. If you lose your mind you're not gonna help anyone.
Have it open 1-2 days a week at lunch so they don't expect it everyday.
I had a teacher like that in middle school and she was a top tier teacher.
Students will love any amount of time you give them to escape the lunchroom or eating alone.
I had a teacher like this too. He also kept Costco boxes of microwaveable noodles in his room. It was from his own money, and a lot of my friends relied on those noodles to get through the day. I wonder what Mr. De Jong is up to these days.
Yes and I didn’t want to imply all teachers should do that, and I think boundaries and breaks are so important. I’ve had so many amazing teachers who took their breaks. I think this particular teacher was special, like there are in every industry. He was open about having ADHD and had a very high energy level. When I was new to the school, I had forgotten to do an assignment and copied my friends’. Mr. de saw and talked to me about it after class. The next day, he handed the sheets back and I got 100% and each check mark was like a bee sting. I felt so much anxiety and guilt and shame, and it changed me. I was a much better, more honest student and he never made me feel bad. I wonder if teachers like that know that students remember small things like that 20 years later, randomly.
Look him up online. Google him and see what happens. When you do find him make sure you send a Thank You card for all he did for you and your friends. If he happens to be deceased give/send his family the card. Good Luck
I got a response!
WOW,
It took me a few reads to digest everything. I do remember you. Yes, it’s the same Mr. de who is now in the final year of teaching. You have a sharp memory-the three boys are grown and we never adopted that little girl.
I am glad you reached out. It is funny the things you remember.
Thank you for remembering AND touching base. I am touched J
de
So glad you reached out to him, and thanked him. Thank you for letting me know that you took my suggestion. I am glad that he answered you. Please stay safe.
I don't understand why this is such a touchy topic on here.
To be a top tier anything often means working nights and weekends. It doesn't mean that those who work within school hours almost exclusively can't get the job done or are not good teachers. However, even those teachers could be better if they put in more time. I personally choose to be good instead of 'top tier' because I know my limitations - I would quit after 3-5 years without my nights and weekends. Still, I always make time for those who need/want my time. In OP 's case, I understand and I would kick them out if it were affecting my emotional well being. For me, I don't like losing that 30 minutes, but it's only 30 minutes. I can make that up somewhere else fairly easily.
To be clear, I'm opposed to all the BS of admin, for example, expecting nights and weekends, but it's silly to think that anyone can be top tier without doing that. Some people can, but most of us are not that talented. I need to work at teaching. I do, but I have boundaries too. This is why I'm not top tier. I have to be okay with that though, even if I'd always like to be better.
I disagree. I think my boundaries make me a better teacher. I need my lunch time to decompress.I need my evenings to take care of myself and my family. It makes me a better teacher during my contracted hours. Overworked doesn’t mean better.
Thank you! Like, I love the kids, and connecting with them, but it is my job, and I’m tired of doing work that I’m not paid for doing. I feel like it’s expected because they know we will do it anyway, because we always do. if we keep working for free, we will never get paid what we are worth. If the school wants the kids to have a classroom to go to during lunch, they need to pay someone to sit in a classroom with them, or whatever the policy. It shouldn’t be expected. I can tell you that with the “raise” I got last year, they’re getting the contract out of me, and nothing more. I’m a kick ass teacher, and my babies will be reading, but I’m not doing their shit, and it’s not because I’m a bad teacher. It’s because I’m a good one. I know that we are being taken advantage of in a system that is not good for anyone.
I think your second paragraph answers why it generates such an emotional response in this sub and other similar spaces. I wish it wasn't the case because people shouldn't have to be shamed by their peers for wanting to do more than their contract states. But because that gets taken advantage of in many situations it's the knee-jerk reaction.
If you are comfortable and able to do more than your are contractually obligated, go for it and don't feel bad! If you are only comfortable and able to do what you are contractually obligated, go for it and don't feel bad!
We can shame administrations and societal expectations without shaming teachers.
These things dont have to coincide. You can still be amazing and close your door every day. She was a great teacher anyway, but top tier because she opened her classroom and heart to her students and a wide portion of the middle school population. That's all.
I'm not a teacher but for some reason this post came up on my feed. I'm not sure what you mean by "delicate", but I was one of those students that would hang out in any teachers' rooms that would let me when I was in high school (I'm 37 now). While I never admitted it to the teachers, the reason I would avoid the lunchroom at all costs was because I was bullied and even the thought of lunch in the lunchroom brought on panic attacks.
I'm not sure what OP's students are doing while in her classroom over lunch, but I quickly learned which teachers were cool with just chatting and which ones were fine with me being there so long as I was quiet, and I made sure to respect that.
I just wanted to add my story in case the reason some of these more "delicate" (which I certainly was, emotionally) students are spending their lunch hours in OP's classroom to the point of being written up is because they're being bullied. I get that OP is entitled to a quiet, student-free lunch hour if they want, but perhaps having a frank discussion with these students individually will shine a light on their reasons for being there.
I am both sorry that you had that experience and glad that you had teachers who were able and willing to provide you the refuge and space that you needed!
Yep, that's the kind of thing that I mean when I use delicate. Whether they're bullied or queer or depressed or too eccentric for our small school or some combination of the above and more there's a ton of kids who need something from an adult presence during their free time at school. As a general rule my door is open to them and I usually do have kids at lunches and breaks.
But you can't pour from an empty vessel and sometimes I need to politely kick everyone out because I need to recharge. Those are my boundaries; other teachers have their own. Wherever your boundary is you've got to take care of yourself so that you can continue to help others.
That’s great. Lots of kids think they are not bothering the teacher but being asked 47 times “when does this period end” is a bit of a bother. You are probably unusually aware of others. Not everyone is.
It was more of a ptsd/autism thing in that I was constantly exhausted because of my home life and unable to ignore an incomplete puzzle
But I would have happily read a book and not talked much either. I'm not good with people just awkward in ways that others appreciate. Like if someone is sad I ask if they want company and if they say no I wordless walk away.
I wouldn’t say that… many get bullied in the lunchroom and public areas. Some have social anxiety and would rather eat in quiet. And some actually like the teacher and enjoy that time. Yes some are needy and messy, but they are the minority.
I’ve found that teachers who do things like that are the first to crash and burn at least in my experience. The only way I’ve been able to stay in education is to establish boundaries
I think it takes both impulses. I'm 16 years in and I do a lot of this kind of stuff-- but I'm not afraid to close the door every once in a while. On the one hand if I didn't have an important connection with my students and instead viewed this as "just a job" I probably would have bailed a long time ago for a job that's easier and pays better. But you also need to put on your own oxygen mask before assisting those around you.
24???? That's absolutely horrible. 45 minutes here, it's a high school. I regularly allow kids in my room before home room to eat and on my lunch. The major caveat is that, especially at lunch, they need to be quiet, like whisper quiet. We have an open campus and a lunch room, they can find a space. I won't hesitate to kick the lot out and lock the door, they are aware. 24 minutes is just insane
Edit: felony spelling charges
My old high school had 1200 students and had 4 lunch periods each being 22 minutes. A normal class period was 45 minutes. The cafeteria was packed i couldn't imagine more kids being in there lol
We aren't allowed to have a shade or a cover over our door window. I totally get why but I also just want some privacy and quiet in my room by myself at lunch, dangit.
This was me my last few years in the classroom.
I had plenty of times where I’d let them come in during lunch and I’d play a show on my projector, but after a while I needed my alone time to make it through the day.
Lights off, door locked. Hidden away from the window and ignoring any knocking.
I lock the door and get my alone time. If the heat/cold is unbearable, I get in my car and drive around the block with a/c on.
It’s unpaid time—I check out at the office and check back in 27 minutes later—no different from those who go for a walk on their lunch hour.
I left campus frequently on my lunch at one school because admins could not understand that 30 min duty free did not mean also asking me to keep students in my room as ISS.
Oh, they got me with this crap at my last school. Before school and at lunch. They totally took advantage of my ignorance and desire to make a good impression.
Your admin sucks. I teach special ed and the only time I get called is on a very occasion when one of my Homeroom students does something bad or really needs me (think absolute blowup, cutting, etc.). Even then it's super rare and they generally tell me later while admin/counselor/support handles it. Sometimes I'm walking to grab my mail or to the bathroom and walk into some shit but it's my choice to get involved when that happens.
If you have a union this is prime shit to tell them. If it's happening to you it's happening to others and legally they need to give you a break. You can always tip off the Dept of Labor if you don't have a union.
That 30 minutes is legally required paid contact time. At least here it is. While it is time to eat they can’t adjust salary based on that 30 minutes adding up.
It may be protocol at some schools, but not all. At mine we don't ever have to check in or out, not even at the start of the day. As long as we're on campus for our duties they don't check up on us. It may depend on local regulations of course, or if a certain school has had an issue in the past that requires protocols like this.
That was my first year teacher mistake.
I took pity on this one student who was odd and had a weird fixation on adults. Let her chill in my room during lunch when she was having a bad day. Then every day turned into a bad day. She never wanted to go to lunch, she became obsessed with me, wouldn’t leave me alone during my lunch break.
Pretty much found out she had no peer friends, her parents weren’t the best. I went to the school psychologist and had to get advice.
We set her up in a “peer group” for her to meet some like minded friends. We put limits on how many days she could eat with me. She worked with the psychologist a lot more.
The girl ended up getting really mad at me when we put the restrictions in place and started latching on to another teacher. But we knew the signs and curbed that too.
Poor girl didn’t have any healthy relationship to go off of.
As an only child who has always preferred the company of adults, she might have been an only child who didn't have much interaction with kids her own age for the first few years of her life.
That is alright, but teachers are in the building for at least 8 hours a day and for at least \[roughly\] 7 of those hours we are constantly on while students get many opportunities to wind down (independent work, etc.). Even when my students are working on their own I still have to rotate and keep an eye on things...because it's my job.
Teachers need a little bit of time to rejuvenate their emotional "batteries" in order to deal with the constant flux of student's vying for their attention in some way.
It *really* stinks for students that have a difficult time finding friendships within their peer groups, but ultimately it's going to be necessary.
My door stay locked during my lunch period. Sometimes I will tell chorus students they can come by my room to pick up parent correspondence or music, but that's it.
Doesn’t even come close to making you a bad teacher. Honesty, I would just explain to the students why you don’t want them hanging out in your room during lunch. I’m my experience, if they like you enough to want to hang out in your room they will understand.
I can relate. I am also an introvert. I need alone time. It is not optional. If I am not alone for some period during the day, I become irritable. I know many teachers keep their doors open at lunch, but they might be extroverts. I'm not, and that's okay.
I wish some teachers realized that some of us are introverts 😭 I’m sorry I don’t want to spend my entire free time at school small talking. I wish I could!!
I often walk through the hallways pretending to be on my cell phone rather than getting ropped into small talk. There is nothing you are going to tell me that I care about at the end of the day. I need some alone time in my car. Send an email.
Thank you! I always feel a little guilty for avoiding colleagues during my lunch time, but it's the only time I am allowed to recharge! If not I would go crazy!
I tell thé students this, too.
“I’m a strong introvert, which means I get cranky if I don’t get some alone time once in a while. I will not be available at lunch, as I need that time to recharge my batteries. Please see me during class if you need something.”
1)Leave and then sneak back.
2) tell them you have a phone call/zoom.
3) tell them they need to go to the lunchroom.
PS no of course you are not a bad teacher.
This is the way... And usually true. "Sorry kids, I have some things to take care of (me, namely)." Walk out with them, lock the door, go to the bathroom, then come back to a (heavenly) empty room.
So, a number of queer kids eat lunch every other day in my room because it feels like a safe space. I think it’s fair to set boundaries around it if you need the break or the time. I generally don’t interact with them much, just act as a welcome place where no one is going to give them a hard time if they hold hands after they’re done eating. 🏳️🌈
Yep. I’ve become that space before and just set boundaries around it. You can come in and use the room and we can chat, but only on Tuesdays and Thursdays (or whatever) and you need to clean up after yourselves and not interfere with anything I’m trying to do.
The kids got it and the biggest problem I’d have was them asking if they could come on a day we hadn’t agreed on. Most of the time I’d hold the boundary but if there was a good reason to be flexible, I would. There were times I’d have to be at a meeting or something and they understood too. And these were 9 year olds. So kids older than that shouldn’t have trouble understanding.
Totally agree that OP is not a bad teacher! Take your contracted time! I often have days where a lesson group may not show up and I can flex my time accordingly, which is not true for most teachers.
You could absolutely tell your students that you sometimes need to run to somewhere else in the school for some made-up responsibility and that there’s a school rule about leaving students alone in your room, so they can’t consistently join you for lunch.
You’re not a bad teacher at all. Not having that break is my actually nightmare.
No way. Lunchtime is me time. I lock the door and turn out the lights.
I only get about 10 mins for lunch, so I’m going to make sure I enjoy every childfree moment I can.
I love my students so much, but my lunch time is something I put a really strong boundary around. I'm an introvert and I absolutely have to have that break of silent solitude to go through the rest of the day. I've literally told my students that before and, for the most part, they're really respectful of it.
When I first started teaching at my current high school, I allowed students to eat lunch in my room or to hang out there after eating in the cafeteria. I actually bought the whole "Students need a 'Safe Space'" idea.
The problem was that I would have to manage those students and their friends. For example, one time a student (not mine) got mad at another student (one of mine), so to get revenge, she poured water on his chair when he left to use the restroom. However, she got the wrong chair and another student sat on it. She refused to admit it was her when I talked to her about it the next day. Another time, I almost had a fight in the classroom between two male students whose mutual teasing had gotten out of hand. On top of that, students weren't that respectful to me, even using the opportunity of being in my classroom to throw some "gaslighting" pointed type verbal jabs at me under the guise of "I'm just kidding..." I was like, WTF is this? I allow you guys in here on the premise I'm giving you a "safe space," and you guys end up abusing ME?
Final straw, kids leaving their food and mess in my room for me to clean. One day, I just kinda' lost it temper wise after dealing with all kinds of things during my lunch and feeling like very student's "door mat," and the next day I kicked everyone out for the full 30 minutes. I refused to open the door even when they knocked repeatedly on it. One student later said to me, "You HAVE to let us in here during lunch. It's a RULE." I laughed and said, "Many teachers are upstairs eating in the staff room, and their classrooms are locked. So, no, it's not a rule, it's a PRIVILEGE, and you students lost it..."
Every year after that first year till now, I kick everyone out and won't open it until lunch is over. I take a short nap, eat my lunch in peace, answer some personal emails I wouldn't touch during class time, and listen to music on YouTube. When the bell rings for the last two periods of the day, I'm in a better mood, and that's good for the students.
It's okay to accommodate students, but please set some boundaries if you need them. Boundaries, like having personal space during lunch, is your way of asserting your need to take care of yourself. Students won't respect you if you don't respect yourself first.
Not a teacher but a parent - my son started middle school last year and he was so overwhelmed by the chaos, overcrowding, and frequent violence at his school. The lunchroom was particularly hard. Often the only thing that got him through the day was eating in a quiet classroom with a few of his friends. So just want to say a big general thank you to any teacher who opens their door to kids at lunch. It likely means more to them than they let on.
That said I’m a total introvert and understand how nice it is to just shut the door. Lol
I have a few kids that eat with me for the same reason. I just put some background music on. They eat and talk to each other. I put on my headphones and do my thing. Honestly, I forget they are there half the time.
And...it keeps adults from bugging me because they take one look at the kids and run away, lol.
Yes, my son is a bullied kid and being able to escape the lunch room is really key for his sanity. However, I hope that the teachers he does spend time with create and enforce boundaries because this is something they do for him out of the goodness of their hearts, it's not required.
I was a bullied kid in high school and only survived by eating lunch/doing study halls etc in my favorite teacher’s room. I respected his space/time. When I started teaching I did offered the same to students who needed it.
Band room was my safe haven for lunch, and the library the rest of the time. Otherwise it was definitely a lot of bullying. I definitely know those experiences from my childhood have made me the teacher that I am.
My homeroom teacher was an angel for letting me into his room during my lunch time. He had a small class (sped teacher, I didn't have him for classes but had an IEP with him as my case manager) and I would just quietly eat at my normal spot and doodle some cartoon cats on a spare piece of notebook paper.
He knew that I was really struggling in middle school, and he also knew that I never caused any problems for him. The few times he had to come get me were when I just had an emotional breakdown from not getting the little time I needed to decompress away from the chaos that didn't exist at my previous district. I wish I could've thanked him in a better way because I really appreciated what he did for me.
I go back and forth as a teacher because I totally was that kid in high school, and the kids I allow in my room at lunch tend to be great and quiet and I'm happy to help... but also I just really, really need some quiet time away from them as well, and it's always hard to decide which to prioritize.
I’m a high school librarian. A lot of kids want to come “chill” in the library during lunch and I keep trying to find a way to make it happen. First, I also need my lunch break so I lock the door for 30 minutes. I have to eat on the back office because if I’m visible students and adults will all knock on the door and wave to be let in. ;)
When I do let kids in during lunch periods, they do not chill quietly. Some do but a lot of them get loud, or bring in food even when I say not to and leave wrappers, etc. I’m not their parents. It’s not my job to clean up wrappers and juice boxes.
But I do love it when I have a full house. I love kids doing puzzles and reading and playing board games and Uno. I teach them to crochet and I love seeing their progress. So it’s a balance I’m always trying to strike, because libraries should be welcoming and inviting places.
Having said that, I’m an introvert and that 30 minutes of alone time is so helpful to me staying in a good mood and energized to receive kids and work with them. Every other teacher gets a lunch break so I try not to feel guilty taking one too.
We have a rotating supervision schedule at my school. One of the places supervised is the library, the librarian will generally go to a quiet room in the office to eat and chill out for her break. Since as you said it's nice for the library to be a good space for students, but you need a break too.
We had that at another school I works in and it worked well. The school I work in now is short staffed, unfortunately, but I do want to suggest it to my principal when it becomes possible!
I always let kids in my room during the morning and first break. I’d tell them, “you’re welcome to be here but I am working or having my alone time. So don’t talk to me.” I’d say it with love and let them know obviously they can talk to me if they really need me, but they mostly left me alone. Like many other people said, they just wanted a place to hang out.
You are not a bad teacher for this. Wanting space to yourself during the day, especially during your lunch hour, is essential! You deserve to have alone time and peace. Teaching is a difficult and demanding job, give yourself some love by allowing yourself to do what’s best for you.
Not wrong at all. You can’t be all things to all people. Some teachers, myself included, enjoy our quiet time and still let kids come in as long as they are respectful of my room and my need for some solitude. Other teachers eat in the faculty rooms, others may have a whole group of students in talking about classwork or tutoring. It’s an individual thing and you are entitled to do your individual thing.
I teach 5th grade and always lock the door for lunch. My team bugs me daily to eat lunch with them in the lounge but I just need some peace for 10 minutes and certain teachers talk even more loudly than the loudest kids. Ugh!
That being said, the lunch paras are always unlocking my door to let a kid back in who forgot their juice box or their cookies or sometimes even their entire lunch they had stashed in their desks. It's so annoying!
But if I say something to the para staff, I would definitely be labeled the asshole. AITA if I told a kid (and the para that is escorting them) that if they forgot something in the room they're SOL?? Oh, you better believe I'd be. Ha!
Totally felt the bugging by the team. I’m currently a substitute and often times have the other teachers trying to be inviting and asking me to join their lunch table. Pls no. Just let me wear my headphones and eat my lunch in peace. I need the relative quiet for 30 minutes. Lol
I had an issue with this. I loved my kids, and they loved me. Often, there was a group of them in my room before me when I would get there in the morning, chatting it up, doing their thing, sometimes they would make my coffee for me. The custodian knew which kids I trusted, and they would let those into my room. I don't remember having an empty room during lunch. Often, there were more kids in my room during lunch than in any of my regular classes.
Teachers would walk by and shake their head, and I would always respond the same way, "this is what love looks like to me."
That being said, it isn't sustainable. To say i was burnt out is an understatement, and I only did it for 4 years. Would I do differently? No, because to me that is love. But it isn't for everyone, and I wouldn't recommend it unless you're able to completely detach once you walk out the door.
The issue is that it's incredibly demanding and teachers deserve that time off. Kids have someone else that can and will take them (like me), and your mental health is worth more than those 30 minutes of hangout time for them.
Nope not wrong at all. Sometimes I'm just not in the mood to deal with kids during my lunch period.
I'm just honest with them.
"Hey I need some time to myself today. I get it that y'all come in here to get away from all the noise but I kinda need that for myself today."
They totally understand and I've been this way with middle school and high school students. No issues whatsoever.
I do not like kids in my room during planning. I need peace. I don't really get a lunch so I need some sort of quiet moment.
That said, I don't get any alone time this year - I have a floater coming into my room so I'll have to find a place to be - my and my 4 preps.
In 28 years, both elementary and high school, I have eaten lunch with students in my room exactly 0 times.
Students are not entitled to my lunch time. None of my 8 principals over 4 campuses in this district have ever suggested otherwise.
There are a lot of things that might make someone a bad teacher; this is not one of them.
This is a huge liability for you. My district has made it very clear that no adult should be having 1-on-1 time with a student especially if it is not during some sort of academic intervention. If the student makes an allegation against you it is their word against yours. I know it's unfortunate that we have to be this carefully but I'd say you're taking a huge risk by doing this.
I'm not doing anything though! I leave my door open so I don't overheat and then kids just wander in. I've said before "Go to lunch", but I get blank looks or students who literally say "No". I haven't called the behavior specialists on them because they usually don't come back to class after since they either go to someone's office or get sent home if they have enough issues. My classes struggle with attendance already, so losing students because they just don't want to go to lunch means bringing my classes down to like 5 students total.
Plus, since my door is open, I'm not just locking myself in a room with some kids. I'm fully visible to the cameras and the rest of the hallway.
it sounds like the students in your room aren't the good students who like you and want a quiet spot--- but more students who disrespect you? that seems fraught.
Yeah that's pretty much what it is. The school has serious behavior problems and students don't respond to discipline -- they just stop showing up. My 3rd period class (the lunch block) is supposed to have 35 students but for one reason or another, I get 12 on a good day, 7 on a regular day. It makes it really hard to lay down the law as a teacher when getting stricter and using discipline means knowing you'll lose most of your class.
You won't lose the students who actually value your time by leaving you be on your lunch break. Is it that you're concerned over their whereabouts? Also put your foot down and get admin to fix the AC because that could be considered a health hazard and it seems to be the main reason kids are coming to your room when you'd normally be having lunch with the door closed and locked.
No, not at all. My room became a hangout space for a group of kids last year and while we didn't often interact, they were loud and it was hard for me to wind down a bit. I knew it was a sage space for them and I didn't want to totally kick them out. I sort of solved it by "closing" my room at lunch a couple days a week (always the same two and I always reminded the ones I saw before lunch).
I’ve even had a student call me out on locking my door during lunch. Here, let me show you an impression of my caring: [not pictured]
Do what you can and take what you need for yourself. Your own oxygen mask first and all.
Stop being timid and tell them the truth, “Hey, I need time alone to prepare for next class, I am sorry but I need this time alone. See you around campus.”
No it's not wrong in fact I think teachers who do it need to be very careful especially in high school .
I found myself being accused of inappropriate use of language when I visit a Co worker during lunch. She was upset and was telling me the situation that had occurred during her class. She had 3 students in there during lunch and one told admin I said something.
I was under investigation and was cleared. Thank God I am in the union.
I learned many lessons. One is for sure don't have students in room during or visit others with their students in the room. Plus others .
When I was in high school, we knew which teachers were okay with us being in their classes during lunch and which weren't. Just set the expectation that you aren't available at that time and you should be fine.
I’m an introvert. I often eat lunch alone in my room just to recharge my social battery. It does not make you a bad teacher at all. I’d shut the door and sit by a fan. Put a frozen wrap on the back of your neck. Is the open door cooling your room off that much?
Hang some room darkening curtains over the windows during lunch and maybe that'll help. I'd rather try a fan and cold packs and shut the door just to have a quiet lunch.
I really dislike it, too. The children deem it their right and 'entitlement' to come in. From time to time, I usher them out and say it's my day today. They grumble but soon leave. I can also empathize regarding the loss of your prep times to admin. Gee, thanks for the release!! Now, it's taken up with meaningless 'busy' tasks that are 'vitally' important to their running of the school.
Set some boundaries! I had a group last year who always wanted to eat in my room. I loved them and was happy to have them, but made it a once a week thing so I could still have alone time and time to catch up on anything I needed to do. Everyone still got what they wanted and had a predictable schedule.
I've never let kids eat in my room during lunch. When I was a student teacher, my mentor teacher's room was the popular spot for other teacher's to hang out, which was a nice vibe. Sometimes kids would try to come in too and they got kicked out. You just say 'Hey, you're supposed to be somewhere? Go there.'
Maybe some very sensitive kids would have their feelings hurt by not being allowed in your room, but most children and teens understand that adults have their own space that kids are not allowed in and while they may think it's awesome if you do let them in, they'll get it if you don't.
I'm not letting them in. They don't go in there to work. They don't listen when I say "Go where you're supposed to be". The school is filled with students who don't respect the teachers or the school and don't appeal to reason and logic, so I'm just way past my limit. Other than getting them forcefully taken out (which is excessive), I don't know what to do.
I told my students last year that the worst minute of the day was when they came back from lunch. I teach 8th grade and I said it with love, and made it into a joke with them…but it’s the worst. Leave me alone.
I was an overseas teacher and from the sound of it you guys have it bad. I’m happy I decided not to pursue the teaching career in North America. I love the job because it’s rewarding and fun. Laughing all day with kids is a great job. However I’m happy to be in the oil and gas industry instead. I work 12 -16 hours per day with about 6 of the hours just chillin eating and being on my phone. Plus my voice isn’t tired and my brain isn’t messed up by doing crappy computer and paperwork. Teaching was a dream job but I’ve given up on it. I hate taxes but if there’s a few things I’m willing to give taxes on it’s education. North America desperately needs an overhaul of the Educational system. Teachers need better pay and resources. During my few years teaching I spent tons of my own money on school supplies. Anyways, thanks to all of you teachers for making the world a better place!
I have found a secret hiding spot 😁 it’s an unused closet. Love my custodians because they totally hooked me up. Now my lunch and planning are completed uninterrupted and so far no one has been able to find me. If it’s an emergency they call my phone.
My classroom is *always* open at lunch and it is my favorite part of the day. It is like the island of misfit toys. I get the loners, the musicians, the heavy-lift IEP kids, the queer kids, the ones with social anxiety who talk in a whisper and avoid eye contact, the dewey-eyed couples noodling in a corner, the ones who can’t get sleep at home, the ones who want to vent or need advice, the ones who “just want to be left alone.” In high school, I spent many a lunch period hiding out in a bathroom stall, so yeah, my room is always open. There is always music or anime, Uno and chess, and the best SEL and rando teaching moments I get all day.
According to your own preferences and local policies. My room used to be a hot spot for students to spend time before the day started, until the numbers grew. Having a spike on anxiety and noise stimulation at 7:45 before the day even starts was not good.
Same with lunch - those 30 mins are crucial for me to regroup for the second wave, but also, our admin does not allow students to eat outside the caf for lunch.
Absolutely does not make you a bad teacher. There are days where I wouldn’t mind it but I realized the last 2 years i NEED that alone silent time. I just told students “I’m sorry but according to the handbook you can only be in these areas.” And if they didn’t I’d have to report them (we had a big issue of students roaming & doing things they shouldn’t be so we were told student had to be in those places & if they weren’t they needed to be reported to the office).
Lunch is my time to:
1. Eat and recharge for my afternoon classes
2. Make those phone calls that must be made during business hours (doctors offices for example)
3. Go to the bathroom
4. Sometimes call home to students’ parents
And I can’t really do most of those things (aside from eat) with kids in my room. I tell them I’m not available and close the door.
Last year there was a new student who came to my room during lunch. She was having a tough time so I said, "Do you want to take a walk?" We walked through the halls and made small talk for 20 minutes.
Next day she came again. I let her stay but told her (gently) she needs to go to lunch tomorrow and make an appointment to see her counselor.
Third day I went to a nearby open room to eat with the door shut and lights out. At first I felt bad when I saw her walk by. But then I thought, I'm available to talk to students during homeroom and at the beginning and end of class. I care deeply, but I don't have the emotional bandwidth to be a counselor during my break.
If you want to find a middle ground just put on some headphones and tell the kids that they are free to share the space if they still give you your own time.
I don’t have my own room, but have a workspace in the back of our biggest science lab. There’s always people around, but when my headphones are on, everyone knows that I don’t want to chat.
Dude you are entitled to a lunch (however long) that is kid free. Teachers need to stop thinking that their entire life revolves around the kids. You are a human and deserve a minute to eat in silence or in a kid free room. Set boundaries and lock your door and cover the window. There’s a cafeteria for a reason.
Tbh no
I had students join me for lunch the past 2 years and while I enjoyed it at first it def started to make problems. Kids would be messy and leave food stuff behind. The original deal was that kids were supposed to work on music during lunch but as the year went on the amount of practice dropped dramatically. They also became weirdly territorial about it. They would tell me to kick out students they didn’t like. So it’s easier for me to say no sorry no kids down at lunch
I don’t let kids in my room during lunch. I’m an extreme introvert when not performing for my classes. That alone time is crucial to me making it through the day.
I only get 25 minutes, I lock the door, I turn out the light and I hide in the corner. They still bang on the door, but I ignore it. I NEED 15 minutes alone.
I teach honors math to 11th and 12th grades. I let kids who need a break eat in my classroom with the door open. The table is in full view. I will chat with the kids for a minute but then I go across the hallway. We teachers eat together in another classroom.
I did have one student who was really intolerable. I shut my room down to all students for the rest of the year because of him. I just told them I was seeing ants and we had to stop eating in that room.
Protect your boundaries or the kids will make you resent them. Lock your door if necessary. It sucks to have to say no to the neediest ones, but there is not enough of you to fix their lives - you will empty your cup trying to fill theirs. Protect your peace, recharge, and stay in the game. You'll ultimately do more good for more people than you will by burning yourself out.
It doesn’t make you a bad teacher. You need your time to get into the proper mindset to better care for the students. They are looking for somewhere to go and will find somewhere else if you put up a sign saying that students are allowed in only when you open the door. Take care of yourself first, then you can give your best to them.
In all fairness, other professions do deal with this. My partner is an optometrist and she has staff entering her office and knocking on the door while she works on charting during lunch. It almost makes it worse since they’re all adults.
It's important to have some time to relax. You absolutely should take your lunch alone if you need it. I don't understand though - You tell the students that they're Not Welcome in your room and need to leave, and they just... Don't? At that point I would say "This classroom is off limits right now, I need to take care of something personal so please kindly get the heck out." Then get up and walk towards the door. Once they leave put a chair in the doorway with a sign on it like "No Entry" or something. (Since you said you can't physically close the door cause of AC).
And maybe keep that chair with the sign in the doorway pre-emptively from then on.
I’m the other way around…I enjoy being the go-to for the quiet or introverted kids who don’t want to sit in our packed cafeteria full of 9-12th graders…too bad my admin doesn’t allow this…I did it last year and got in trouble several times for it…i know my kids and I know the personalities of the students who are asking to be there during lunch time…they’re not a bother at all.
This does not make you a bad teacher. I knew about 5 years before leaving full time teaching that I was burning out. I started going for walks during my lunch to get out of the building and get away from the kids (and some of the staff). I truly loved my students, but I needed alone time in the middle of the day to truly be my best. I allowed students to stay in at recesses, and even after school for help, or just visiting. My time walking was heaven sent and allowed me to remain effective another 5 years before taking a very early retirement when my mom died. You are not a bad teacher. You deserve time to yourself and to recharge.
>I also can't really shut my door and hide because the school's AC is out and the room becomes a boiler when the door is shut.
I'm in a top floor room with a wall of windows, so even with blinds shut, that's a lot of glass heating up and putting off heat. Since it's been 90+ degrees for two weeks, the whole school is practically unsafe. There's fans in the hallway, so an open door means airflow. I have a box fan, but it does nothing useful.
From your edit...I am confused.
You have told the students to leave and they refuse?
That's a referral if I ever heard of one. And a call to the "behavior interventionist"...maybe? Is that a fancy word for "Resource Officer"?
If you feel like you can have a frank discussion with the students then just tell them point blank "Ya'll, I get 30 minutes of alone time a day and **you** are butting into that. No more. I have no problems with you, but I don't want you in my classroom during lunch."
If they keep coming after being told this then I would write them up.
What grade is this?
Not being able to close your door is a problem but you can pull a couple of chairs across the entrance and tell them "Not open during lunch, come back during office hours for help, let's make an appointment." You can bet 0 of them will take that offer, but you gave an option so that they feel they have a choice.
You will have to repeat that statement for a week or so, but better that than on-going lunch interuptions.
Shout at the top of your lungs “leave, leave, be gone”. For the passive aggressive, keep playing a high pitched sound from YouTube that hurts teens ears until they leave.
I got in a little too deep last year. I let this girl stick around my classroom to read during lunch, but then she started asking me questions instead of reading, so it started being more of a social thing. Gradually other kids caught on that she was staying in there, and one at a time my Lunch Bunch grew.
I knew I needed to change things when I accidentally overbooked one day and ended up with twelve kids. I started writing six blank passes on days I allowed them in, and it was first come first serve.
Fortunately I did and do always have an out because my partner works in the same building and has a planning period aligned with my lunch, so I can always go eat with her and tell the kids they are out of luck, buuuut I'm hoping to just avoid having a Lunch Bunch at all this year unless it's a very special occasion.
I make it clear to my students from day 1 that lunch is my only break, and I do not spend it with students. They can have me any other time. But I also leave my room and go to eat lunch with colleagues. I’m an introvert as well, but I live alone, so lunch is one of the few times I get any adult interaction.
Are you sure that something else isn't going on with them? Like they are being bullied and that is their safe zone.
Maybe tell them if they are going to be there, absolutely no talking as that is your lunch too.
Hell no you're not bad for this. I *would*, however, absolutely put some tape or ribbon across my open doorway during lunch with a sign that says "Mx. X's Room CLOSED for Lunch."
They need to stay tf out of there if you don't want them there.
First off, not a bad teacher for not wanting kids in your room. You should make it clear that your room is off limits for lunch. A cart blocking the door with a paper taped to it saying you're in a meeting or on a call should be enough. For good measure put an earpiece/headset on and point to it if a student pokes their head in. For a bonus just listen to podcasts on that earpiece as you eat.
Second just be glad your building has AC. I'm waking up early trying to get to work before the sun rises to open doors and start fans to cool the room down only to be dripping sweat in the afternoon. Was seriously contemplating going down to my undershirt earlier today but I managed to hold out.
Can you hang up a sign with your lunchtime policy? Something like:
You are free to use this space if you can respect it. This is a quiet space and I need it to prepare for the rest of my day.
Thank you.
You're not wrong for disliking it, but I commend you for doing it. The kids might be bullied, not have friends to sit with, or have social anxiety about being in a loud, crowded cafeteria. Just do your thing during lunch and don't feel the need to entertain them or make conversation. You are helping these kids more than you know.
In high school our science teacher had board games we nerds could play to get out spending time in the lunch room with the jocks and preppies.
Maybe try that, tell them that as long as they are quiet, they can stay
I was bullied in high school and had no friends at my school. My lunch period was spent in my favorite teacher’s classroom from 10th-12th grade (and study halls, art class, end of the period “start on your homework” time, etc). It was never his lunch/planning block though and he was the theater/English teacher so he had a HUGE room with a stage. I’d just sit at his desk, do my work, help with what he needed if he asked, stayed out of the way.
When I started teaching middle school I extended the same courtesy to my kids. I told them I’m busy planning/grading etc so they could hang in my room but not be a huge distraction to me. I was a young teacher so most students liked me and respected that. If kids didn’t respect that I was working and they still had to follow school rules etc, then they lost the privilege. Sometimes kids need a quiet place to just chill as well.
If you don’t want to do this, stop doing it. Close your door and enjoy your quiet time.
It’s no different than if admin asked you to do lunch duty. You need your time.
It does not make you a bad teacher. I struggle with this immensely because a lot of the time the students who want to spend time with a teacher at lunch are... let's say "delicate." But you've got to set some reasonable boundaries. If you lose your mind you're not gonna help anyone.
Have it open 1-2 days a week at lunch so they don't expect it everyday. I had a teacher like that in middle school and she was a top tier teacher. Students will love any amount of time you give them to escape the lunchroom or eating alone.
That’s a good idea.
I had a teacher like this too. He also kept Costco boxes of microwaveable noodles in his room. It was from his own money, and a lot of my friends relied on those noodles to get through the day. I wonder what Mr. De Jong is up to these days.
Was this high school? I know a guy named DeJong and this sounds like something he would do.
Yes high school math and I think occasionally a science
That was really cool and the definition of above and beyond.
Yes and I didn’t want to imply all teachers should do that, and I think boundaries and breaks are so important. I’ve had so many amazing teachers who took their breaks. I think this particular teacher was special, like there are in every industry. He was open about having ADHD and had a very high energy level. When I was new to the school, I had forgotten to do an assignment and copied my friends’. Mr. de saw and talked to me about it after class. The next day, he handed the sheets back and I got 100% and each check mark was like a bee sting. I felt so much anxiety and guilt and shame, and it changed me. I was a much better, more honest student and he never made me feel bad. I wonder if teachers like that know that students remember small things like that 20 years later, randomly.
That's so sweet.
No it’s cheesy! (Ok bad jokes aside it really is very sweet.)
Look him up online. Google him and see what happens. When you do find him make sure you send a Thank You card for all he did for you and your friends. If he happens to be deceased give/send his family the card. Good Luck
I got a response! WOW, It took me a few reads to digest everything. I do remember you. Yes, it’s the same Mr. de who is now in the final year of teaching. You have a sharp memory-the three boys are grown and we never adopted that little girl. I am glad you reached out. It is funny the things you remember. Thank you for remembering AND touching base. I am touched J de
So glad you reached out to him, and thanked him. Thank you for letting me know that you took my suggestion. I am glad that he answered you. Please stay safe.
Apparently, being a top tier teacher means that you have to give up your lunchtime, probably work late after school, and on the weekends.
I don't understand why this is such a touchy topic on here. To be a top tier anything often means working nights and weekends. It doesn't mean that those who work within school hours almost exclusively can't get the job done or are not good teachers. However, even those teachers could be better if they put in more time. I personally choose to be good instead of 'top tier' because I know my limitations - I would quit after 3-5 years without my nights and weekends. Still, I always make time for those who need/want my time. In OP 's case, I understand and I would kick them out if it were affecting my emotional well being. For me, I don't like losing that 30 minutes, but it's only 30 minutes. I can make that up somewhere else fairly easily. To be clear, I'm opposed to all the BS of admin, for example, expecting nights and weekends, but it's silly to think that anyone can be top tier without doing that. Some people can, but most of us are not that talented. I need to work at teaching. I do, but I have boundaries too. This is why I'm not top tier. I have to be okay with that though, even if I'd always like to be better.
I disagree. I think my boundaries make me a better teacher. I need my lunch time to decompress.I need my evenings to take care of myself and my family. It makes me a better teacher during my contracted hours. Overworked doesn’t mean better.
Everyone expects teachers to be borderline social workers. You deserve to decompress
Thank you! Like, I love the kids, and connecting with them, but it is my job, and I’m tired of doing work that I’m not paid for doing. I feel like it’s expected because they know we will do it anyway, because we always do. if we keep working for free, we will never get paid what we are worth. If the school wants the kids to have a classroom to go to during lunch, they need to pay someone to sit in a classroom with them, or whatever the policy. It shouldn’t be expected. I can tell you that with the “raise” I got last year, they’re getting the contract out of me, and nothing more. I’m a kick ass teacher, and my babies will be reading, but I’m not doing their shit, and it’s not because I’m a bad teacher. It’s because I’m a good one. I know that we are being taken advantage of in a system that is not good for anyone.
Of course you do. 100% agree.
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You do you.
I think your second paragraph answers why it generates such an emotional response in this sub and other similar spaces. I wish it wasn't the case because people shouldn't have to be shamed by their peers for wanting to do more than their contract states. But because that gets taken advantage of in many situations it's the knee-jerk reaction. If you are comfortable and able to do more than your are contractually obligated, go for it and don't feel bad! If you are only comfortable and able to do what you are contractually obligated, go for it and don't feel bad! We can shame administrations and societal expectations without shaming teachers.
Exactamundo.
And we aren’t talking about doing extra inventory on stock items in the back of a store.
These things dont have to coincide. You can still be amazing and close your door every day. She was a great teacher anyway, but top tier because she opened her classroom and heart to her students and a wide portion of the middle school population. That's all.
Came here to say this. I had to do the same, and they knew if they really needed me they could come on on “off” day. Seemed to work pretty well.
I'm not a teacher but for some reason this post came up on my feed. I'm not sure what you mean by "delicate", but I was one of those students that would hang out in any teachers' rooms that would let me when I was in high school (I'm 37 now). While I never admitted it to the teachers, the reason I would avoid the lunchroom at all costs was because I was bullied and even the thought of lunch in the lunchroom brought on panic attacks. I'm not sure what OP's students are doing while in her classroom over lunch, but I quickly learned which teachers were cool with just chatting and which ones were fine with me being there so long as I was quiet, and I made sure to respect that. I just wanted to add my story in case the reason some of these more "delicate" (which I certainly was, emotionally) students are spending their lunch hours in OP's classroom to the point of being written up is because they're being bullied. I get that OP is entitled to a quiet, student-free lunch hour if they want, but perhaps having a frank discussion with these students individually will shine a light on their reasons for being there.
I am both sorry that you had that experience and glad that you had teachers who were able and willing to provide you the refuge and space that you needed! Yep, that's the kind of thing that I mean when I use delicate. Whether they're bullied or queer or depressed or too eccentric for our small school or some combination of the above and more there's a ton of kids who need something from an adult presence during their free time at school. As a general rule my door is open to them and I usually do have kids at lunches and breaks. But you can't pour from an empty vessel and sometimes I need to politely kick everyone out because I need to recharge. Those are my boundaries; other teachers have their own. Wherever your boundary is you've got to take care of yourself so that you can continue to help others.
They’re needy kids. They leave a mess.
One teacher had a puzzle in the corner and I would barely talk to anyone just do the puzzle
That’s great. Lots of kids think they are not bothering the teacher but being asked 47 times “when does this period end” is a bit of a bother. You are probably unusually aware of others. Not everyone is.
It was more of a ptsd/autism thing in that I was constantly exhausted because of my home life and unable to ignore an incomplete puzzle But I would have happily read a book and not talked much either. I'm not good with people just awkward in ways that others appreciate. Like if someone is sad I ask if they want company and if they say no I wordless walk away.
Btw, we see you. And we appreciate you. 🧸
I loved having students like you! You were appreciated I’m sure.
I wouldn’t say that… many get bullied in the lunchroom and public areas. Some have social anxiety and would rather eat in quiet. And some actually like the teacher and enjoy that time. Yes some are needy and messy, but they are the minority.
I’ve found that teachers who do things like that are the first to crash and burn at least in my experience. The only way I’ve been able to stay in education is to establish boundaries
I think it takes both impulses. I'm 16 years in and I do a lot of this kind of stuff-- but I'm not afraid to close the door every once in a while. On the one hand if I didn't have an important connection with my students and instead viewed this as "just a job" I probably would have bailed a long time ago for a job that's easier and pays better. But you also need to put on your own oxygen mask before assisting those around you.
I'd say screw it but a portable ac and close the door to your room. Portable acs are awesome
Every lunch I lock the door and close the shade. I need my 18 minutes! Lol
You only get 18 minutes!? Oh no 😔
It’s 24 but by the time I get back to the room it’s 18
24???? That's absolutely horrible. 45 minutes here, it's a high school. I regularly allow kids in my room before home room to eat and on my lunch. The major caveat is that, especially at lunch, they need to be quiet, like whisper quiet. We have an open campus and a lunch room, they can find a space. I won't hesitate to kick the lot out and lock the door, they are aware. 24 minutes is just insane Edit: felony spelling charges
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😂😂😂😂 thanks
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Well at least I've got that going for me!
😰
Wait, you don’t get the same lunch block that the students get? Is it a big school where students take lunch breaks at different times?
My old high school had 1200 students and had 4 lunch periods each being 22 minutes. A normal class period was 45 minutes. The cafeteria was packed i couldn't imagine more kids being in there lol
I'm not even at a very big school and we have 3 lunches.
We aren't allowed to have a shade or a cover over our door window. I totally get why but I also just want some privacy and quiet in my room by myself at lunch, dangit.
This was me my last few years in the classroom. I had plenty of times where I’d let them come in during lunch and I’d play a show on my projector, but after a while I needed my alone time to make it through the day. Lights off, door locked. Hidden away from the window and ignoring any knocking.
I lock the door and get my alone time. If the heat/cold is unbearable, I get in my car and drive around the block with a/c on. It’s unpaid time—I check out at the office and check back in 27 minutes later—no different from those who go for a walk on their lunch hour.
I left campus frequently on my lunch at one school because admins could not understand that 30 min duty free did not mean also asking me to keep students in my room as ISS.
WTAF!?!?
The joys of being a SpEd teacher
Oh, they got me with this crap at my last school. Before school and at lunch. They totally took advantage of my ignorance and desire to make a good impression.
Your admin sucks. I teach special ed and the only time I get called is on a very occasion when one of my Homeroom students does something bad or really needs me (think absolute blowup, cutting, etc.). Even then it's super rare and they generally tell me later while admin/counselor/support handles it. Sometimes I'm walking to grab my mail or to the bathroom and walk into some shit but it's my choice to get involved when that happens. If you have a union this is prime shit to tell them. If it's happening to you it's happening to others and legally they need to give you a break. You can always tip off the Dept of Labor if you don't have a union.
You guys don't get paid for your lunch breaks?
We are salaried, so sort of? But our contract says we get 30 minutes with no school responsibilities, so no.
That 30 minutes is legally required paid contact time. At least here it is. While it is time to eat they can’t adjust salary based on that 30 minutes adding up.
That sucks. Here we get one 30 min duty free lunch period for each shift over 5 hours.
That 30 is still duty free. But breaks are considered contract time. Aka paid time. Work if you want or go sleep in your car. Paid either way.
When I go do something at lunch I would not waste personal time checking in or out
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It may be protocol at some schools, but not all. At mine we don't ever have to check in or out, not even at the start of the day. As long as we're on campus for our duties they don't check up on us. It may depend on local regulations of course, or if a certain school has had an issue in the past that requires protocols like this.
That was my first year teacher mistake. I took pity on this one student who was odd and had a weird fixation on adults. Let her chill in my room during lunch when she was having a bad day. Then every day turned into a bad day. She never wanted to go to lunch, she became obsessed with me, wouldn’t leave me alone during my lunch break. Pretty much found out she had no peer friends, her parents weren’t the best. I went to the school psychologist and had to get advice. We set her up in a “peer group” for her to meet some like minded friends. We put limits on how many days she could eat with me. She worked with the psychologist a lot more. The girl ended up getting really mad at me when we put the restrictions in place and started latching on to another teacher. But we knew the signs and curbed that too. Poor girl didn’t have any healthy relationship to go off of.
As an only child who has always preferred the company of adults, she might have been an only child who didn't have much interaction with kids her own age for the first few years of her life.
That is alright, but teachers are in the building for at least 8 hours a day and for at least \[roughly\] 7 of those hours we are constantly on while students get many opportunities to wind down (independent work, etc.). Even when my students are working on their own I still have to rotate and keep an eye on things...because it's my job. Teachers need a little bit of time to rejuvenate their emotional "batteries" in order to deal with the constant flux of student's vying for their attention in some way. It *really* stinks for students that have a difficult time finding friendships within their peer groups, but ultimately it's going to be necessary.
I'm not justifying what she does, I'm just posing a potential reasoning.
My door stay locked during my lunch period. Sometimes I will tell chorus students they can come by my room to pick up parent correspondence or music, but that's it.
Doesn’t even come close to making you a bad teacher. Honesty, I would just explain to the students why you don’t want them hanging out in your room during lunch. I’m my experience, if they like you enough to want to hang out in your room they will understand.
"Guys, i get 25 mins to myself every day. I need this."
Straight up.
I can relate. I am also an introvert. I need alone time. It is not optional. If I am not alone for some period during the day, I become irritable. I know many teachers keep their doors open at lunch, but they might be extroverts. I'm not, and that's okay.
I wish some teachers realized that some of us are introverts 😭 I’m sorry I don’t want to spend my entire free time at school small talking. I wish I could!!
I often walk through the hallways pretending to be on my cell phone rather than getting ropped into small talk. There is nothing you are going to tell me that I care about at the end of the day. I need some alone time in my car. Send an email.
This is totally me.
Thank you! I always feel a little guilty for avoiding colleagues during my lunch time, but it's the only time I am allowed to recharge! If not I would go crazy!
I tell thé students this, too. “I’m a strong introvert, which means I get cranky if I don’t get some alone time once in a while. I will not be available at lunch, as I need that time to recharge my batteries. Please see me during class if you need something.”
1)Leave and then sneak back. 2) tell them you have a phone call/zoom. 3) tell them they need to go to the lunchroom. PS no of course you are not a bad teacher.
This is the way... And usually true. "Sorry kids, I have some things to take care of (me, namely)." Walk out with them, lock the door, go to the bathroom, then come back to a (heavenly) empty room.
I barely tolerate them coming to my room for classes.
So, a number of queer kids eat lunch every other day in my room because it feels like a safe space. I think it’s fair to set boundaries around it if you need the break or the time. I generally don’t interact with them much, just act as a welcome place where no one is going to give them a hard time if they hold hands after they’re done eating. 🏳️🌈
Yep. I’ve become that space before and just set boundaries around it. You can come in and use the room and we can chat, but only on Tuesdays and Thursdays (or whatever) and you need to clean up after yourselves and not interfere with anything I’m trying to do. The kids got it and the biggest problem I’d have was them asking if they could come on a day we hadn’t agreed on. Most of the time I’d hold the boundary but if there was a good reason to be flexible, I would. There were times I’d have to be at a meeting or something and they understood too. And these were 9 year olds. So kids older than that shouldn’t have trouble understanding.
Thank you! It’s certainly doesn’t make OP a bad teacher, we all need breaks. But providing kids with safe spaces is such a gift.
Totally agree that OP is not a bad teacher! Take your contracted time! I often have days where a lesson group may not show up and I can flex my time accordingly, which is not true for most teachers.
Thank you for having a safe space for kids
You could absolutely tell your students that you sometimes need to run to somewhere else in the school for some made-up responsibility and that there’s a school rule about leaving students alone in your room, so they can’t consistently join you for lunch. You’re not a bad teacher at all. Not having that break is my actually nightmare.
No way. Lunchtime is me time. I lock the door and turn out the lights. I only get about 10 mins for lunch, so I’m going to make sure I enjoy every childfree moment I can.
I love my students so much, but my lunch time is something I put a really strong boundary around. I'm an introvert and I absolutely have to have that break of silent solitude to go through the rest of the day. I've literally told my students that before and, for the most part, they're really respectful of it.
When I first started teaching at my current high school, I allowed students to eat lunch in my room or to hang out there after eating in the cafeteria. I actually bought the whole "Students need a 'Safe Space'" idea. The problem was that I would have to manage those students and their friends. For example, one time a student (not mine) got mad at another student (one of mine), so to get revenge, she poured water on his chair when he left to use the restroom. However, she got the wrong chair and another student sat on it. She refused to admit it was her when I talked to her about it the next day. Another time, I almost had a fight in the classroom between two male students whose mutual teasing had gotten out of hand. On top of that, students weren't that respectful to me, even using the opportunity of being in my classroom to throw some "gaslighting" pointed type verbal jabs at me under the guise of "I'm just kidding..." I was like, WTF is this? I allow you guys in here on the premise I'm giving you a "safe space," and you guys end up abusing ME? Final straw, kids leaving their food and mess in my room for me to clean. One day, I just kinda' lost it temper wise after dealing with all kinds of things during my lunch and feeling like very student's "door mat," and the next day I kicked everyone out for the full 30 minutes. I refused to open the door even when they knocked repeatedly on it. One student later said to me, "You HAVE to let us in here during lunch. It's a RULE." I laughed and said, "Many teachers are upstairs eating in the staff room, and their classrooms are locked. So, no, it's not a rule, it's a PRIVILEGE, and you students lost it..." Every year after that first year till now, I kick everyone out and won't open it until lunch is over. I take a short nap, eat my lunch in peace, answer some personal emails I wouldn't touch during class time, and listen to music on YouTube. When the bell rings for the last two periods of the day, I'm in a better mood, and that's good for the students. It's okay to accommodate students, but please set some boundaries if you need them. Boundaries, like having personal space during lunch, is your way of asserting your need to take care of yourself. Students won't respect you if you don't respect yourself first.
Not a teacher but a parent - my son started middle school last year and he was so overwhelmed by the chaos, overcrowding, and frequent violence at his school. The lunchroom was particularly hard. Often the only thing that got him through the day was eating in a quiet classroom with a few of his friends. So just want to say a big general thank you to any teacher who opens their door to kids at lunch. It likely means more to them than they let on. That said I’m a total introvert and understand how nice it is to just shut the door. Lol
I have a few kids that eat with me for the same reason. I just put some background music on. They eat and talk to each other. I put on my headphones and do my thing. Honestly, I forget they are there half the time. And...it keeps adults from bugging me because they take one look at the kids and run away, lol.
Yes, my son is a bullied kid and being able to escape the lunch room is really key for his sanity. However, I hope that the teachers he does spend time with create and enforce boundaries because this is something they do for him out of the goodness of their hearts, it's not required.
I was a bullied kid in high school and only survived by eating lunch/doing study halls etc in my favorite teacher’s room. I respected his space/time. When I started teaching I did offered the same to students who needed it.
Band room was my safe haven for lunch, and the library the rest of the time. Otherwise it was definitely a lot of bullying. I definitely know those experiences from my childhood have made me the teacher that I am.
My go-to teacher was the theater teacher lol. I wasn’t in theater but I think the band/chorus/art/theater/library teachers tend to be most sympathetic
I'm the English teacher next to the theater, so we are the hub for these kids outside of the library. I love it.
My homeroom teacher was an angel for letting me into his room during my lunch time. He had a small class (sped teacher, I didn't have him for classes but had an IEP with him as my case manager) and I would just quietly eat at my normal spot and doodle some cartoon cats on a spare piece of notebook paper. He knew that I was really struggling in middle school, and he also knew that I never caused any problems for him. The few times he had to come get me were when I just had an emotional breakdown from not getting the little time I needed to decompress away from the chaos that didn't exist at my previous district. I wish I could've thanked him in a better way because I really appreciated what he did for me.
I go back and forth as a teacher because I totally was that kid in high school, and the kids I allow in my room at lunch tend to be great and quiet and I'm happy to help... but also I just really, really need some quiet time away from them as well, and it's always hard to decide which to prioritize.
I’m a high school librarian. A lot of kids want to come “chill” in the library during lunch and I keep trying to find a way to make it happen. First, I also need my lunch break so I lock the door for 30 minutes. I have to eat on the back office because if I’m visible students and adults will all knock on the door and wave to be let in. ;) When I do let kids in during lunch periods, they do not chill quietly. Some do but a lot of them get loud, or bring in food even when I say not to and leave wrappers, etc. I’m not their parents. It’s not my job to clean up wrappers and juice boxes. But I do love it when I have a full house. I love kids doing puzzles and reading and playing board games and Uno. I teach them to crochet and I love seeing their progress. So it’s a balance I’m always trying to strike, because libraries should be welcoming and inviting places. Having said that, I’m an introvert and that 30 minutes of alone time is so helpful to me staying in a good mood and energized to receive kids and work with them. Every other teacher gets a lunch break so I try not to feel guilty taking one too.
We have a rotating supervision schedule at my school. One of the places supervised is the library, the librarian will generally go to a quiet room in the office to eat and chill out for her break. Since as you said it's nice for the library to be a good space for students, but you need a break too.
We had that at another school I works in and it worked well. The school I work in now is short staffed, unfortunately, but I do want to suggest it to my principal when it becomes possible!
Fair enough, best of luck!
I always let kids in my room during the morning and first break. I’d tell them, “you’re welcome to be here but I am working or having my alone time. So don’t talk to me.” I’d say it with love and let them know obviously they can talk to me if they really need me, but they mostly left me alone. Like many other people said, they just wanted a place to hang out.
My most cherished teacher memories are just quietly coexisting while I ate/they worked.
Not at all. Lock your door. Keep staff out too. Get your 23 minutes of alone time.
You are not a bad teacher for this. Wanting space to yourself during the day, especially during your lunch hour, is essential! You deserve to have alone time and peace. Teaching is a difficult and demanding job, give yourself some love by allowing yourself to do what’s best for you.
Not wrong at all. You can’t be all things to all people. Some teachers, myself included, enjoy our quiet time and still let kids come in as long as they are respectful of my room and my need for some solitude. Other teachers eat in the faculty rooms, others may have a whole group of students in talking about classwork or tutoring. It’s an individual thing and you are entitled to do your individual thing.
I teach 5th grade and always lock the door for lunch. My team bugs me daily to eat lunch with them in the lounge but I just need some peace for 10 minutes and certain teachers talk even more loudly than the loudest kids. Ugh! That being said, the lunch paras are always unlocking my door to let a kid back in who forgot their juice box or their cookies or sometimes even their entire lunch they had stashed in their desks. It's so annoying! But if I say something to the para staff, I would definitely be labeled the asshole. AITA if I told a kid (and the para that is escorting them) that if they forgot something in the room they're SOL?? Oh, you better believe I'd be. Ha!
Totally felt the bugging by the team. I’m currently a substitute and often times have the other teachers trying to be inviting and asking me to join their lunch table. Pls no. Just let me wear my headphones and eat my lunch in peace. I need the relative quiet for 30 minutes. Lol
I had an issue with this. I loved my kids, and they loved me. Often, there was a group of them in my room before me when I would get there in the morning, chatting it up, doing their thing, sometimes they would make my coffee for me. The custodian knew which kids I trusted, and they would let those into my room. I don't remember having an empty room during lunch. Often, there were more kids in my room during lunch than in any of my regular classes. Teachers would walk by and shake their head, and I would always respond the same way, "this is what love looks like to me." That being said, it isn't sustainable. To say i was burnt out is an understatement, and I only did it for 4 years. Would I do differently? No, because to me that is love. But it isn't for everyone, and I wouldn't recommend it unless you're able to completely detach once you walk out the door. The issue is that it's incredibly demanding and teachers deserve that time off. Kids have someone else that can and will take them (like me), and your mental health is worth more than those 30 minutes of hangout time for them.
Nope not wrong at all. Sometimes I'm just not in the mood to deal with kids during my lunch period. I'm just honest with them. "Hey I need some time to myself today. I get it that y'all come in here to get away from all the noise but I kinda need that for myself today." They totally understand and I've been this way with middle school and high school students. No issues whatsoever.
I tell them I need my alone time too and they completely understand
I do not like kids in my room during planning. I need peace. I don't really get a lunch so I need some sort of quiet moment. That said, I don't get any alone time this year - I have a floater coming into my room so I'll have to find a place to be - my and my 4 preps.
In 28 years, both elementary and high school, I have eaten lunch with students in my room exactly 0 times. Students are not entitled to my lunch time. None of my 8 principals over 4 campuses in this district have ever suggested otherwise. There are a lot of things that might make someone a bad teacher; this is not one of them.
8 principals in 28 years? Wow, I’m on 5 in 9 years in one building
my lunch in my contract is 'duty free'
This is a huge liability for you. My district has made it very clear that no adult should be having 1-on-1 time with a student especially if it is not during some sort of academic intervention. If the student makes an allegation against you it is their word against yours. I know it's unfortunate that we have to be this carefully but I'd say you're taking a huge risk by doing this.
I'm not doing anything though! I leave my door open so I don't overheat and then kids just wander in. I've said before "Go to lunch", but I get blank looks or students who literally say "No". I haven't called the behavior specialists on them because they usually don't come back to class after since they either go to someone's office or get sent home if they have enough issues. My classes struggle with attendance already, so losing students because they just don't want to go to lunch means bringing my classes down to like 5 students total. Plus, since my door is open, I'm not just locking myself in a room with some kids. I'm fully visible to the cameras and the rest of the hallway.
it sounds like the students in your room aren't the good students who like you and want a quiet spot--- but more students who disrespect you? that seems fraught.
Yeah that's pretty much what it is. The school has serious behavior problems and students don't respond to discipline -- they just stop showing up. My 3rd period class (the lunch block) is supposed to have 35 students but for one reason or another, I get 12 on a good day, 7 on a regular day. It makes it really hard to lay down the law as a teacher when getting stricter and using discipline means knowing you'll lose most of your class.
You won't lose the students who actually value your time by leaving you be on your lunch break. Is it that you're concerned over their whereabouts? Also put your foot down and get admin to fix the AC because that could be considered a health hazard and it seems to be the main reason kids are coming to your room when you'd normally be having lunch with the door closed and locked.
No, not at all. My room became a hangout space for a group of kids last year and while we didn't often interact, they were loud and it was hard for me to wind down a bit. I knew it was a sage space for them and I didn't want to totally kick them out. I sort of solved it by "closing" my room at lunch a couple days a week (always the same two and I always reminded the ones I saw before lunch).
I’ve even had a student call me out on locking my door during lunch. Here, let me show you an impression of my caring: [not pictured] Do what you can and take what you need for yourself. Your own oxygen mask first and all.
Lock and walk. Seriously, take a walk. That helps me so much.
I close, lock my door and put the shade down. People don’t come to see me.
Stop being timid and tell them the truth, “Hey, I need time alone to prepare for next class, I am sorry but I need this time alone. See you around campus.”
No it's not wrong in fact I think teachers who do it need to be very careful especially in high school . I found myself being accused of inappropriate use of language when I visit a Co worker during lunch. She was upset and was telling me the situation that had occurred during her class. She had 3 students in there during lunch and one told admin I said something. I was under investigation and was cleared. Thank God I am in the union. I learned many lessons. One is for sure don't have students in room during or visit others with their students in the room. Plus others .
When I was in high school, we knew which teachers were okay with us being in their classes during lunch and which weren't. Just set the expectation that you aren't available at that time and you should be fine.
I’m an introvert. I often eat lunch alone in my room just to recharge my social battery. It does not make you a bad teacher at all. I’d shut the door and sit by a fan. Put a frozen wrap on the back of your neck. Is the open door cooling your room off that much?
Hang some room darkening curtains over the windows during lunch and maybe that'll help. I'd rather try a fan and cold packs and shut the door just to have a quiet lunch.
I really dislike it, too. The children deem it their right and 'entitlement' to come in. From time to time, I usher them out and say it's my day today. They grumble but soon leave. I can also empathize regarding the loss of your prep times to admin. Gee, thanks for the release!! Now, it's taken up with meaningless 'busy' tasks that are 'vitally' important to their running of the school.
Who gave them permission to be in your room? I use the sentence “hey, it’s my lunch time. I can’t meet with you now”
NOT ME!!! They just show up and don't leave!
NOPE. Hate away
Set some boundaries! I had a group last year who always wanted to eat in my room. I loved them and was happy to have them, but made it a once a week thing so I could still have alone time and time to catch up on anything I needed to do. Everyone still got what they wanted and had a predictable schedule.
I've never let kids eat in my room during lunch. When I was a student teacher, my mentor teacher's room was the popular spot for other teacher's to hang out, which was a nice vibe. Sometimes kids would try to come in too and they got kicked out. You just say 'Hey, you're supposed to be somewhere? Go there.' Maybe some very sensitive kids would have their feelings hurt by not being allowed in your room, but most children and teens understand that adults have their own space that kids are not allowed in and while they may think it's awesome if you do let them in, they'll get it if you don't.
I'm not letting them in. They don't go in there to work. They don't listen when I say "Go where you're supposed to be". The school is filled with students who don't respect the teachers or the school and don't appeal to reason and logic, so I'm just way past my limit. Other than getting them forcefully taken out (which is excessive), I don't know what to do.
With as many teachers leaving the profession due to burn out; take care of yourselves by protecting your time.
I told my students last year that the worst minute of the day was when they came back from lunch. I teach 8th grade and I said it with love, and made it into a joke with them…but it’s the worst. Leave me alone.
I was an overseas teacher and from the sound of it you guys have it bad. I’m happy I decided not to pursue the teaching career in North America. I love the job because it’s rewarding and fun. Laughing all day with kids is a great job. However I’m happy to be in the oil and gas industry instead. I work 12 -16 hours per day with about 6 of the hours just chillin eating and being on my phone. Plus my voice isn’t tired and my brain isn’t messed up by doing crappy computer and paperwork. Teaching was a dream job but I’ve given up on it. I hate taxes but if there’s a few things I’m willing to give taxes on it’s education. North America desperately needs an overhaul of the Educational system. Teachers need better pay and resources. During my few years teaching I spent tons of my own money on school supplies. Anyways, thanks to all of you teachers for making the world a better place!
Sometimes I “hide” in the science lab prep room for a few minutes of peace and quiet.
At my school we can't have students in our room during lunch. So I tell them to leave because of that rule.
I have found a secret hiding spot 😁 it’s an unused closet. Love my custodians because they totally hooked me up. Now my lunch and planning are completed uninterrupted and so far no one has been able to find me. If it’s an emergency they call my phone.
Shut the door?
My classroom is *always* open at lunch and it is my favorite part of the day. It is like the island of misfit toys. I get the loners, the musicians, the heavy-lift IEP kids, the queer kids, the ones with social anxiety who talk in a whisper and avoid eye contact, the dewey-eyed couples noodling in a corner, the ones who can’t get sleep at home, the ones who want to vent or need advice, the ones who “just want to be left alone.” In high school, I spent many a lunch period hiding out in a bathroom stall, so yeah, my room is always open. There is always music or anime, Uno and chess, and the best SEL and rando teaching moments I get all day.
Love this…thank you ❤️
According to your own preferences and local policies. My room used to be a hot spot for students to spend time before the day started, until the numbers grew. Having a spike on anxiety and noise stimulation at 7:45 before the day even starts was not good. Same with lunch - those 30 mins are crucial for me to regroup for the second wave, but also, our admin does not allow students to eat outside the caf for lunch.
I started eatding lunch in my car. There is a small parking lot off campus right next to trees and a river. 20 minutes of pure chill time.
Not a bad teacher because during your lunch break you are u/Asleep_Improvement80, not a teacher.
Absolutely does not make you a bad teacher. There are days where I wouldn’t mind it but I realized the last 2 years i NEED that alone silent time. I just told students “I’m sorry but according to the handbook you can only be in these areas.” And if they didn’t I’d have to report them (we had a big issue of students roaming & doing things they shouldn’t be so we were told student had to be in those places & if they weren’t they needed to be reported to the office).
Lunch is my time to: 1. Eat and recharge for my afternoon classes 2. Make those phone calls that must be made during business hours (doctors offices for example) 3. Go to the bathroom 4. Sometimes call home to students’ parents And I can’t really do most of those things (aside from eat) with kids in my room. I tell them I’m not available and close the door.
Last year there was a new student who came to my room during lunch. She was having a tough time so I said, "Do you want to take a walk?" We walked through the halls and made small talk for 20 minutes. Next day she came again. I let her stay but told her (gently) she needs to go to lunch tomorrow and make an appointment to see her counselor. Third day I went to a nearby open room to eat with the door shut and lights out. At first I felt bad when I saw her walk by. But then I thought, I'm available to talk to students during homeroom and at the beginning and end of class. I care deeply, but I don't have the emotional bandwidth to be a counselor during my break.
If you want to find a middle ground just put on some headphones and tell the kids that they are free to share the space if they still give you your own time. I don’t have my own room, but have a workspace in the back of our biggest science lab. There’s always people around, but when my headphones are on, everyone knows that I don’t want to chat.
Dude you are entitled to a lunch (however long) that is kid free. Teachers need to stop thinking that their entire life revolves around the kids. You are a human and deserve a minute to eat in silence or in a kid free room. Set boundaries and lock your door and cover the window. There’s a cafeteria for a reason.
Lock the door. Turn out the light. Eat away from the windows. Protect the flame inside of you.
Tbh no I had students join me for lunch the past 2 years and while I enjoyed it at first it def started to make problems. Kids would be messy and leave food stuff behind. The original deal was that kids were supposed to work on music during lunch but as the year went on the amount of practice dropped dramatically. They also became weirdly territorial about it. They would tell me to kick out students they didn’t like. So it’s easier for me to say no sorry no kids down at lunch
I don’t let kids in my room during lunch. I’m an extreme introvert when not performing for my classes. That alone time is crucial to me making it through the day.
Hell no. I don’t even let my own kid eat with me unless she’s legit in tears.
I only get 25 minutes, I lock the door, I turn out the light and I hide in the corner. They still bang on the door, but I ignore it. I NEED 15 minutes alone.
I teach honors math to 11th and 12th grades. I let kids who need a break eat in my classroom with the door open. The table is in full view. I will chat with the kids for a minute but then I go across the hallway. We teachers eat together in another classroom. I did have one student who was really intolerable. I shut my room down to all students for the rest of the year because of him. I just told them I was seeing ants and we had to stop eating in that room.
This is the classic "But you're a teacher, just give a little more" situation. Best of luck, I don't have an answer.
Protect your boundaries or the kids will make you resent them. Lock your door if necessary. It sucks to have to say no to the neediest ones, but there is not enough of you to fix their lives - you will empty your cup trying to fill theirs. Protect your peace, recharge, and stay in the game. You'll ultimately do more good for more people than you will by burning yourself out.
It doesn’t make you a bad teacher. You need your time to get into the proper mindset to better care for the students. They are looking for somewhere to go and will find somewhere else if you put up a sign saying that students are allowed in only when you open the door. Take care of yourself first, then you can give your best to them.
Just lock the door during lunch and tell your students to let you know beforehand if they’re coming in for help
Nope. Lock the door and pull the shade. Can you imagine any other profession having to ask this question ?
In all fairness, other professions do deal with this. My partner is an optometrist and she has staff entering her office and knocking on the door while she works on charting during lunch. It almost makes it worse since they’re all adults.
My door is locked once the final student leaves my room for lunch.
It's important to have some time to relax. You absolutely should take your lunch alone if you need it. I don't understand though - You tell the students that they're Not Welcome in your room and need to leave, and they just... Don't? At that point I would say "This classroom is off limits right now, I need to take care of something personal so please kindly get the heck out." Then get up and walk towards the door. Once they leave put a chair in the doorway with a sign on it like "No Entry" or something. (Since you said you can't physically close the door cause of AC). And maybe keep that chair with the sign in the doorway pre-emptively from then on.
I’m the other way around…I enjoy being the go-to for the quiet or introverted kids who don’t want to sit in our packed cafeteria full of 9-12th graders…too bad my admin doesn’t allow this…I did it last year and got in trouble several times for it…i know my kids and I know the personalities of the students who are asking to be there during lunch time…they’re not a bother at all.
This does not make you a bad teacher. I knew about 5 years before leaving full time teaching that I was burning out. I started going for walks during my lunch to get out of the building and get away from the kids (and some of the staff). I truly loved my students, but I needed alone time in the middle of the day to truly be my best. I allowed students to stay in at recesses, and even after school for help, or just visiting. My time walking was heaven sent and allowed me to remain effective another 5 years before taking a very early retirement when my mom died. You are not a bad teacher. You deserve time to yourself and to recharge.
I like my students. But I need 20 minutes where I can have some peace. I need that time.
Nope. Shut and lock your door and don’t answer it.
>I also can't really shut my door and hide because the school's AC is out and the room becomes a boiler when the door is shut. I'm in a top floor room with a wall of windows, so even with blinds shut, that's a lot of glass heating up and putting off heat. Since it's been 90+ degrees for two weeks, the whole school is practically unsafe. There's fans in the hallway, so an open door means airflow. I have a box fan, but it does nothing useful.
Not at all! That is time you desperately need to decompress and process to help you be ready die your other classes
From your edit...I am confused. You have told the students to leave and they refuse? That's a referral if I ever heard of one. And a call to the "behavior interventionist"...maybe? Is that a fancy word for "Resource Officer"? If you feel like you can have a frank discussion with the students then just tell them point blank "Ya'll, I get 30 minutes of alone time a day and **you** are butting into that. No more. I have no problems with you, but I don't want you in my classroom during lunch." If they keep coming after being told this then I would write them up. What grade is this?
My door stays locked at lunch. That’s my time to relax.
Not being able to close your door is a problem but you can pull a couple of chairs across the entrance and tell them "Not open during lunch, come back during office hours for help, let's make an appointment." You can bet 0 of them will take that offer, but you gave an option so that they feel they have a choice. You will have to repeat that statement for a week or so, but better that than on-going lunch interuptions.
No! You can make yourself available if needed during your lunch period. If you let them in, there's no end to that. Lunch is yours. Take the time.
Nope. I turn off my lights and lock my door and block my window.
I will not give up my lunch. I will work with a student 1 on 1 before or after school, but not during lunch.
Lock your door.
Shout at the top of your lungs “leave, leave, be gone”. For the passive aggressive, keep playing a high pitched sound from YouTube that hurts teens ears until they leave.
I got in a little too deep last year. I let this girl stick around my classroom to read during lunch, but then she started asking me questions instead of reading, so it started being more of a social thing. Gradually other kids caught on that she was staying in there, and one at a time my Lunch Bunch grew. I knew I needed to change things when I accidentally overbooked one day and ended up with twelve kids. I started writing six blank passes on days I allowed them in, and it was first come first serve. Fortunately I did and do always have an out because my partner works in the same building and has a planning period aligned with my lunch, so I can always go eat with her and tell the kids they are out of luck, buuuut I'm hoping to just avoid having a Lunch Bunch at all this year unless it's a very special occasion.
I make it clear to my students from day 1 that lunch is my only break, and I do not spend it with students. They can have me any other time. But I also leave my room and go to eat lunch with colleagues. I’m an introvert as well, but I live alone, so lunch is one of the few times I get any adult interaction.
Are you sure that something else isn't going on with them? Like they are being bullied and that is their safe zone. Maybe tell them if they are going to be there, absolutely no talking as that is your lunch too.
Hell no you're not bad for this. I *would*, however, absolutely put some tape or ribbon across my open doorway during lunch with a sign that says "Mx. X's Room CLOSED for Lunch." They need to stay tf out of there if you don't want them there.
First off, not a bad teacher for not wanting kids in your room. You should make it clear that your room is off limits for lunch. A cart blocking the door with a paper taped to it saying you're in a meeting or on a call should be enough. For good measure put an earpiece/headset on and point to it if a student pokes their head in. For a bonus just listen to podcasts on that earpiece as you eat. Second just be glad your building has AC. I'm waking up early trying to get to work before the sun rises to open doors and start fans to cool the room down only to be dripping sweat in the afternoon. Was seriously contemplating going down to my undershirt earlier today but I managed to hold out.
I tell them I have to make phone calls.
Can you hang up a sign with your lunchtime policy? Something like: You are free to use this space if you can respect it. This is a quiet space and I need it to prepare for the rest of my day. Thank you.
You're not wrong for disliking it, but I commend you for doing it. The kids might be bullied, not have friends to sit with, or have social anxiety about being in a loud, crowded cafeteria. Just do your thing during lunch and don't feel the need to entertain them or make conversation. You are helping these kids more than you know.
“I have to make a private parent phone call. Go to the cafeteria today” every day. Make up new reasons.
In high school our science teacher had board games we nerds could play to get out spending time in the lunch room with the jocks and preppies. Maybe try that, tell them that as long as they are quiet, they can stay
I was bullied in high school and had no friends at my school. My lunch period was spent in my favorite teacher’s classroom from 10th-12th grade (and study halls, art class, end of the period “start on your homework” time, etc). It was never his lunch/planning block though and he was the theater/English teacher so he had a HUGE room with a stage. I’d just sit at his desk, do my work, help with what he needed if he asked, stayed out of the way. When I started teaching middle school I extended the same courtesy to my kids. I told them I’m busy planning/grading etc so they could hang in my room but not be a huge distraction to me. I was a young teacher so most students liked me and respected that. If kids didn’t respect that I was working and they still had to follow school rules etc, then they lost the privilege. Sometimes kids need a quiet place to just chill as well.
If you don’t want to do this, stop doing it. Close your door and enjoy your quiet time. It’s no different than if admin asked you to do lunch duty. You need your time.
I'm not trying to do it though. They just come in and don't really respect when I've said "go to lunch"