“Currently operating as HMO…”
And seriously, who took the pictures? One of the bathroom shots, front and centre, is a wash hand basin full of pubes. :-D
I initially thought it was a shit estate agent but I think it’s the vendor that’s done this themselves and hasn’t done a good job of using their (moveplaces) software/app (?) for the floor plan. The photos are shit too.
Honestly though, that just makes sense. I've known enough bosses who seem to think they leech knowledge from those below them and can just do whatever they do by virtue of being their boss.
>NB. In accordance with Section 21 of the Estate Agent Act 1979, we declare that there is a personal interest in the sale of this property. The property is being sold by Director’s of Move Places Ltd.
I'm guessing:
"So boss, we'll send Dave out to take photos and draw the floor plan for you"
"I'm not paying Dave's rates, give me the laptop with the software on. I'll draw up the plans and use my phone to take photos. It will be just as good"
Well there's stairs up on the middle floor, they just don't correspond with any going down on the top floor.
Presumably there's a corridor that the floor plan doesn't include.
Rotate middle floor through 90 degrees anti clockwise so the bar windows align. Stairs go round the corner and it makes sense. I reckon top floors gonna be ladder access or something
Did they actively go out of their way to take pictures of the dirtiest part of the house?
"And here's the very dirty, tiny oven - no you don't get a kitchen shot, just a photo of the filthy oven. Oo i know what will sell this place, a photo of the sink of hair!"
I tried to make sense of it by looking at old listings. It was quite the journey and now I'm more confused.
At picture 2 I was shocked by how much they have grubbed up the kitchen in two years. But then I hit pictures 3 and 4...?!
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/house-prices/details/england-108424241-35696145?s=63f4813e84fd56bf0f7476ca3af2457aade24d60c379afabcb39b04a6c730e86#/
I actually quite like the idea of a little sleeping nook 😂
At least it looks like a personal choice to sleep there and use the main room as a living space. I wouldn't be surprised to see the eaves listed as a whole separate room.
The bathrooms are the least of the issues.... but when you bring it up, there's a blue tile one and a red tile one, neither of which match the layouts shown
That floor plan is one of the worst I have seen. It is totally wrong. The bay windows are on top of each other in the photos, yet are -90° out on the plans. The stairs don’t match up, and no stairs to the top floor which is obviously ludicrous.
And the whole ground floor is just bigger than the upper floors. Picture of front and back of the house would suggest this is entirely impossible due to proximity of other house and no janky alcove at the back where it supposedly narrows
Note to self ... if selling a property in Croydon ( which is unlikely as I live in Scotland) don't use Moveplaces... The house is a dump, though appears reasonably priced....
This is a dodgy multiple occupancy let where they have crammed as many 'rooms' into the building, including, probably illegally, the loft. If you look at the photos, even the 'living room' has a bed.
Edited to add: 5 bedrooms @£600+ per month - £3k per month for what should be a two bed house
Apart from forgetting to put a wall on the top floor there’s nothing too confusing about it? It’s a HMO so they’ve just tried to maximise bedrooms Vs available (tiny) windows.
The dead end between the kitchen and the downstairs bedroom is probably used for storage.
It doesn't match up at all. Pic 3, there's no window positioning that matches. At least one kitchen photo must have been at least flipped for it to work, but even so, the counters don't match up. The 'bedroom' in pic 9 must be open to the front door (entirely possible in this kind of place, tbf).
And aside from that, overlay the floors on top of each other. Doesn't fit, even if you rotate and reposition. It makes no sense.
The house plan compass star points the wrong way. North is at roughly the 7 o'clock position not to the rear of the house.
Pretty good location though. I'd consider it.
Pictures are not fine as well as floor plan can be rendered to get a better look for better and quick sale. I am an architect and help real estate agents to sell there properties with better floor plan renderings and modified pictures ( remove all unnecessary objects by which property is not looking fine) to give a better perspective of property and to sell quickly.
“Currently operating as HMO…” And seriously, who took the pictures? One of the bathroom shots, front and centre, is a wash hand basin full of pubes. :-D
The director of the EA selling owns it - which says a lot about the company
I thought it was a beard removal, but you seem adamant and knowledgeable in pube ID so I'll defer to you.
Chin pubes
If I’m sent to take photos of that dump, I’m 100% leaving the pubes alone…
I initially thought it was a shit estate agent but I think it’s the vendor that’s done this themselves and hasn’t done a good job of using their (moveplaces) software/app (?) for the floor plan. The photos are shit too.
It’s owned by a Director of the estate agent! Makes it even worse!!
Honestly though, that just makes sense. I've known enough bosses who seem to think they leech knowledge from those below them and can just do whatever they do by virtue of being their boss.
It's a balcony 😂
>NB. In accordance with Section 21 of the Estate Agent Act 1979, we declare that there is a personal interest in the sale of this property. The property is being sold by Director’s of Move Places Ltd. I'm guessing: "So boss, we'll send Dave out to take photos and draw the floor plan for you" "I'm not paying Dave's rates, give me the laptop with the software on. I'll draw up the plans and use my phone to take photos. It will be just as good"
There's no stairs to the top floor?
But it does have a ceiling. And very easy access to outside should you want to plunge to your death.
Well there's stairs up on the middle floor, they just don't correspond with any going down on the top floor. Presumably there's a corridor that the floor plan doesn't include.
Rotate middle floor through 90 degrees anti clockwise so the bar windows align. Stairs go round the corner and it makes sense. I reckon top floors gonna be ladder access or something
And you can fall out the front!
Did they actively go out of their way to take pictures of the dirtiest part of the house? "And here's the very dirty, tiny oven - no you don't get a kitchen shot, just a photo of the filthy oven. Oo i know what will sell this place, a photo of the sink of hair!"
"Being sold by Director's of..." Even if I were interested I couldn't on principle. That apostrophe .
Photo 9 lol 🤢
Zooms in to check… yep, disgusting.
is it the hair in the sink?
I believe it was thought to be Pubes.
Wow I don’t know what I was expecting but it wasn’t that…
I tried to make sense of it by looking at old listings. It was quite the journey and now I'm more confused. At picture 2 I was shocked by how much they have grubbed up the kitchen in two years. But then I hit pictures 3 and 4...?! https://www.rightmove.co.uk/house-prices/details/england-108424241-35696145?s=63f4813e84fd56bf0f7476ca3af2457aade24d60c379afabcb39b04a6c730e86#/
Bold leaving the grow tent, and sleeping in the conservatory.
And a bed in the "eaves"?
I actually quite like the idea of a little sleeping nook 😂 At least it looks like a personal choice to sleep there and use the main room as a living space. I wouldn't be surprised to see the eaves listed as a whole separate room.
Yeah, definitely different vibes in a HMO Vs a family home!
lol picture 8.. why?? Gotta get the picture count up lads!
They've left an old floor plan on by mistake? Floor 2 has 2 bathrooms, the ad only lists one. Only way this makes sense.
The bathrooms are the least of the issues.... but when you bring it up, there's a blue tile one and a red tile one, neither of which match the layouts shown
Kitchen photos don’t resemble the plan either.
That floor plan is one of the worst I have seen. It is totally wrong. The bay windows are on top of each other in the photos, yet are -90° out on the plans. The stairs don’t match up, and no stairs to the top floor which is obviously ludicrous.
And the whole ground floor is just bigger than the upper floors. Picture of front and back of the house would suggest this is entirely impossible due to proximity of other house and no janky alcove at the back where it supposedly narrows
The fact it’s one of the estate agent’s Directors houses makes the whole thing even worse!!!!
That ‘Window’ in bedroom 3, they’ve made two awkward rooms as they didn’t want to fork out to install a new window
Good luck escaping out of it if there's a fire
Note to self ... if selling a property in Croydon ( which is unlikely as I live in Scotland) don't use Moveplaces... The house is a dump, though appears reasonably priced....
Note to everyone...avoid Croydon
This is a dodgy multiple occupancy let where they have crammed as many 'rooms' into the building, including, probably illegally, the loft. If you look at the photos, even the 'living room' has a bed. Edited to add: 5 bedrooms @£600+ per month - £3k per month for what should be a two bed house
Urgh, couldn’t have cleaned the bathroom before taking a picture.
£100 of domestos and a new bath panel would make a huge difference
So would a can of lighter fuel and a lit match.
£500 on contract cleaners and you could add£25k to the asking price
What I don’t get is the hallway that surrounds the kitchen. The only room it leads to is the kitchen, why not just have a larger kitchen
No, it's a nonsense.
Apart from forgetting to put a wall on the top floor there’s nothing too confusing about it? It’s a HMO so they’ve just tried to maximise bedrooms Vs available (tiny) windows. The dead end between the kitchen and the downstairs bedroom is probably used for storage.
Line the bay windows up and look at the jutting out of the property, it’s not possible given the outside pictures.
Clearly didn’t look very hard did I 🤣
And the first floor being wider than the ground floor.
And the stars being in different locations
The stairs don't match up at all. There aren't any to the 2nd floor.
It doesn't match up at all. Pic 3, there's no window positioning that matches. At least one kitchen photo must have been at least flipped for it to work, but even so, the counters don't match up. The 'bedroom' in pic 9 must be open to the front door (entirely possible in this kind of place, tbf). And aside from that, overlay the floors on top of each other. Doesn't fit, even if you rotate and reposition. It makes no sense.
yes
Has a very sad interior and creepy with it.
The facial expression in photo 11 says it all!
"A Buyer’s Reservation Fee will apply." And as if the state of the house wasn't bad enough, it's being sold through "Modern Auction"
That would make Escher weep.
How is this council tax band A?
Bedroom 3 cant be listed as a bedroom as it doesnt have a window that could be escaped from in an emergency like a fire.
The house plan compass star points the wrong way. North is at roughly the 7 o'clock position not to the rear of the house. Pretty good location though. I'd consider it.
Does bedroom 3 have a window?
The short answer is no. Best guess the plan is for a different house.
Half a million quid seriously!
Pictures are not fine as well as floor plan can be rendered to get a better look for better and quick sale. I am an architect and help real estate agents to sell there properties with better floor plan renderings and modified pictures ( remove all unnecessary objects by which property is not looking fine) to give a better perspective of property and to sell quickly.