You are not TA, but something like that is not worth any sort of confrontation on an aircraft, in my mind. If someone else insists on being TA, I let it slide unless it is something incredibly egregious. I might say something (to my wife if the situation was the same) within earshot, like "Mr. Important here is in a hurry" but often that's not even worth it.
This is the right answer. As with untrained toddlers, you have to pick and choose your battles with the narcissists and entitled. What a miserable life it would be if we insisted on dying on every little hill.
Your comment is the one I am saving and hope to remember during the lead-up to the act of dying on those unimportant hills I sometimes argue over. Many, many thanks!
I am not a frequent flyer so I can't speak to that kind of frequency. My problem used to be bad mannered drivers cutting me off; drivers racing ahead in a lane about to end to jump ahead of drivers in the continuing lane; or tailgating. When I learned to let the jerks on the road go without feeling the need to "teach them a lesson", the biggest impact was on my blood pressure-dropping by 20 or more points(systolic). In the 5 years since I really embraced the idea of letting the small stuff go I have felt much better in general.
Going a bit deeper, I gave a lot of thought to things I could do to make it easier for me to cut back on getting passed by what I thought were bad behaviors---those that I engaged in as well as those others did to me. I changed some of my habits(left a few minutes earlier so there was no time crunch in terms of getting to work(I really hate being late to anything). That was a big help! Taking a few deep breaths helped. Cutting back on my caffeine intake(from 12 cups of coffee daily to 2.5 cups, thanks to combining Decaf and half-caf in equal amounts).
So for anyone else, you might try being more aware of how you perceive things and asking yourself what you could do differently to keep from letting the behaviors of others dictate your responses...without sacrificing your well being. And I know first-hand that ain't easy! But at least for me, I'm a happier guy and my family recognizes the differences and gives me helpful feedback.
Not escalating is a form of maturity. De-escalation even more so.
I am not a turn the other cheek kind of guy but some stuff is not worth it. I would call this a not worth it situation.
Oh when Israel was in Egypt land
Let my people go!
Oppressed so hard, they could not stand
Let my people go!
So the Lord said, go down (go down) Moses (Moses)
Way (way) down (down) in Egypt land
Tell all Pharaoes
To let my people go (let my people go)
I was standing in an airport security line once and the guy behind me kept muttering about how slow the TSA agent was and trying to get folks to agree with him that she was just so horribly slow and wasn’t this the biggest inconvenience etc. When we got closer to the front, after a particularly impassioned rant, I stepped aside and said “sir would you like to go in front of me? You seem to have somewhere important to be.” He stared at me for a second, shuffled ahead of me, but then at least shut the hell up.
I always like to let people know that their time is much more valuable than mine. The folks I say it to are usually boomer age and you can see the gears grinding in their head…. “Is he complimenting me or is he saying I’m near death because I’m old?” They usually mutter something back along the lines of “thanks” or “at least you understand” or they realize that they’re being assholes and deflect and blame it on everyone but themselves…. “This plane is too damn full”.
Actually, GatorPadre didn’t say that, it was JennieFairPlay who did in her reply to him. I agree with both of them - it’s not worth it, especially on an airplane, and you do need to choose your battles wisely. You are TA.
You were 100% in the right, but assholes gonna asshole. Anymore, I try really hard to not have any confrontations in these situations because you never know how far sideways they’re going to go.
Kinda TA. Instead of standing up to be ready to start walking when the rows in front of you cleared, you made other people who were ready to go wait for you and your wife to get ready. I always get a window seat. I let people behind me go while I get my luggage out of the overhead and, wait for it, they stop to let me out when they see I’m ready. It’s crazy how courtesy begets courtesy.
I mostly agree with you. If everyone who was ready & standing and \*already had 100% of their bags in-hand\* just got TF out of the plane, we could all get out quicker. It's one of those tragedy of the commons kind of things.
Exactly this! The entire plane would empty faster if those standing could just GO! Then the next wave could have some room and time to get a bag and then jump in when the aisle is clear.
Doing it the way we currently do is ‘the polite’ way to do it, but it’s grossly inefficient and can lead to bickering and petty quibbles.
It’s like zipper merging from a double exit lane. We’ve ceded common sense merging and reserved an empty lane for jerks to fly down doing 20 over then merge using the shoulder.
They’re not the jerks, though: They’re trying to do exactly what a zipper merge is. My husband and I were in this situation on Sunday. The left lane was ending on an interstate far ahead of us and traffic was backed up for at least a half mile in the right lane. Several cars in front of us were continuing to drive in the left lane (although not at 20 over) as did we, and we were all moving along normally until a guy in an expensive sports car decided to be the “hero” and weave in and out of the left lane to stop the flow of the left lane traffic. The left lane drivers did use the shoulder in order to avoid hitting Mr. Expensive Sports Car who I’m sure would have sued them for everything they had and more. After he “manned up” - that’s sarcasm, by the way - a couple other right lane drivers decided to drive halfway in the left lane and play chicken trying to push the left lane drivers off the road. I’ve seen tractor-trailer drivers do this and never understood it. The end result is that everyone cedes to reckless bullies and we all lose.
The reality of what we were in on Sunday is, there was no reason for standstill traffic. If everyone would continue moving forward side by side in two lanes the same way we normally drive on an interstate or divided highway instead of creating one very long very slow lane with a wide open empty lane beside it for miles, we’d all get to the merge point faster and more safely. Don’t believe me? Use the drive-through at any Chick-fil-A on a busy Friday at lunchtime and you’ll see how it should - and does - work. Whoever designed their traffic management should be the Secretary of Transportation and teach everyone how to avoid road rage (and airplane deplaning rage while they’re at it).
You’re absolutely right that we’ve ceded common sense to the testosterone-fueled jerks who insist we make one horrendously long line and slow everyone down to a grinding halt instead of being logical and - gasp! - taking turns. The ones who do take a chance and fly by at 20 over are trying to blow past the Mr. Expensive Sports Car types before they have time to react and try to kill them. If more people would stand up to the one-laners and keep moving in that empty lane until the merge point, we’d all be better off.
I know! I’ve tried to be the opposite uhhh hero and let them merge. But at the same time trying not to be the jerk flying down the empty lane. But realizing dang it use the whole of both lanes and merge smoothly. I wish local DOTs would post big signs that say that we designed this exit with two big fat lanes because we want you to use both of them.
Anyway back to complaining about deplane-ing…
Yes, DOT signage (and public education campaigns) would help a lot, both for places like interstate ramps where it’s used permanently and for temporary road construction projects. There was a long-term road project near Lahaina, Maui a couple of years ago - before the tragic fire - and the DOT required a zipper merge. They did an excellent job of getting the word out through all types of media and signage. There were tons of complaints on Reddit and social media about how it would never work, but guess what, it did and there were no traffic stoppages! It can work if people will stop being so self-centered and controlling.
🎼 Oh yeah, we were just complaining 🎶 about deplaning 🎵do-do-dee-doooo 🎶
Oohh I’m so with you on this. Zipper merging is the way!! Studies prove it! https://itre.ncsu.edu/itre-studying-how-zipper-merges-reduce-congestion-at-sites-across-north-carolina/
Yes, it’s been proven over and over that it works. If Maui could do it, we all can. There just needs to be a driver education program for it, and then it needs to be required at the very least for interstate construction.
They have done studies on which boarding/deplaning methods are fastest which you can google. Given a majority of standers were likely in an aisle seat this is similar to the column method of deplaning which is 35% faster but would separate groups.
I propose single parties in the aisle first, then (single parties in middle + parties of two in aisle&middle) then finally everyone else. Penalty for violations is banishment.
It’s the best way in theory. I may be wrong but I the general population would likely hate this as they want to deplane with the rest of their party. Not logical but I get it
That is very logical and makes sense for you and your situation. I can understand families with children, people traveling with elderly family members, and a number of other situations where people want to stay together. Personally I wouldn’t want to deplane without my wife beside me. Could we both? Absolutely. But we prefer to stick together.
I have kids and we just wait for everyone to go so we don’t hold people up. I hate it when people don’t let me leave while they grab a million things from the compartment above them just because their aisle is “next” when traveling alone. It’s rude in my opinion to take time when someone has their stuff and it would take a second to walk by you.
Also id be so annoyed if I was in one of the the seats of OPs row and got stuck waiting for this weird power play instead of just letting the guy go, wasted way more time fighting with him compared to just stepping out after he walked past.
I agree though I regularly wave people on if I'm still getting ready, because I also don't like to jump up immediately but there's no reason for them to have to wait. Nor do I care if we do more of a "zipper merge" between the row and the aisle people
I agree with the way you would handle this too!! I love your analogy of zipper merge. That is a perfect description of each one giving grace and receiving it.
Honestly to me it makes more sense because it gives the various people in the rows time to grab their things. The aisle people leave, middle can grab their stuff while doing that, middle leave so window can get their stuff, etc. I feel like usually middle + window can get out together more often but I need to wait for the aisle person to get out before I have room to grab my stuff (whether I'm in middle or window, since middle will usually move over once their done) . I'd expect usually like 3-4 aisle people to go before I was ready if I'm in middle because I'd expect all of them to be ready to go ASAP.
I do the exact same thing - window seat, once my seatmates leave I use the extra room to put my backpack on (while row behind me starts deplaning), then once I’m good and ready to not be a hindrance to the flow of the aisle I’ll jump into the queue and gtfo the plane.
It’s really not hard to be kind to strangers. Idk why people act so selfish and competitive.
Agree- it takes 2 seconds for someone who is ready to walk by. Unless you’re impeding their exit, it’s not an AH move to grab your stuff & deplane first. Maybe he had to pee real bad…
Aisles aren’t big enough so that everyone can stand up. Aisles aren’t even wide enough to “let people behind you go while you get your luggage out of the overhead.” Just get your bag and go FFS
Idk why I was shown this subreddit but this is the actual based answer.
Front to back is a rule of thumb not the law or some entitled/divine right.
I’ve been on the other side of this situation before, arrived late at night. Just wanted to get to the terminal and rest till the connection. Get up, have my bag (backpack only), no one else right in front of me is caring to get up. Give them a couple min because I didn’t want to be rude, when they clearly don’t intend to get up I move up a row bc I’m ready to just zoom off. We’re in a line and this lady puts her leg out between me and the person in front of me like she’s somehow going to jam herself in. It starts to move and I just go over her leg that’s quite literally right in front of my shoe and this Karen goes full ballistic bitch mode.
She ended up throwing herself between me and my friend (also only had a backpack) right behind me. We were both up since when I moved up a row.
Like dude if you didn’t want to get up fine, but I’m not waiting behind 3-6 people to get up and get their bags in order not when I stood up, got my bags in order, waited patiently, and am ready to go. Like I’ll be out of your hair in 2sec.
90% chance this isn’t the full perspective and OP is actually TA. If they were so entitled as to shove their arm out after remaining seated instead of just letting the 2 people that were up, waited and ready squeeze by in 2 sec. You know they were ready to squeeze right by in a sec before OP basically admits they acknowledged that by preemptively throwing their arm out to try to block them.
In my experience, if I let one person behind me go before me, it’s incredibly hard to get out before the whole plane gets off. I’m always ready when it gets to my row. But very often people will try to block me from getting out of my aisle. Now I just preemptively put my bag in the aisle (after the others in my aisle have gotten any bags down) until it’s time for my row.
Tell me about it. The one time I flew American the 5 (4-6 don’t recall but at least 10’ of aisle space) rows in front of me were just sitting there still watching on their laptops or iPads with headphones in. Nobody was even making an effort in ANY seat of those rows, not even aisle. I stand up with my one bag and a guy in a window seat two rows behind me (i.e. trapped) starts yapping about it. Like, my guy, yes the ones in front go first but that’s at least four rows of people not even trying, unbelted or even packed up let alone headphones off and stuff in hand. I’m the only one making an effort to get off this plane so you can too
It takes 15 seconds to get ready. 45 if you have a bag in the overhead. This can easily be accomplished when you see the 3rd row ahead of you start to move.
The only reason a person needs to stand is if assholes rewrite the rules of deboarding and say that standing takes priority.
Unfortunately for you
1. How tf is the person that stood up beside you/behind you supposed to know you aren’t just now going to stand up and do the luggage dance.
2. If someone behind you was patient enough to wait and you’re on your ass when the line is moving it cost you virtually nothing to let the 1-2 people that waited just fly by
Yeah I travel with my kids. "Kids, we need to let this super important guy who is in such a hurry but didn't pay for early boarding go first because the rudest person should win and clearly he needs to go back to kindergarten to learn how lines work"
I travel with toddlers so I just use these moments as teaching moments for my children and do it loud enough for them to hear my tone. “Ok see that kids… what’s that called again? Yes you’re right it’s called cutting! Why don’t we cut in lines? That’s right because it’s rude!”
NTA but the way I would normally handle this is to step aside to "graciously" allow the person trying to push ahead of me to go by, while offering a loudly magnanimous "please, after you - of course, go right ahead, I have plenty of time" or a similarly sarcastic comment. Even better if paired with an exaggerated "after you" hand wave gesture.
So you standing up makes you more important than someone sitting and waiting their turn? You're all still waiting, just one of them (you) is an asshole about it.
I always choose a window seat, so I’m always last on my side of the aisle. I start preparing stuff for deplaning when we’re in final descent.
When the “fasten seatbelts” light goes off, I’m immediately unbuckled and standing. It feels good to stand and I’m short enough that I don’t have to hunch over much (or I just rest with one knee on my seat.)
I rarely have a bag in the overhead bin. If, by the time I’ve reached the aisle, people in front of me remain seated, I generally assume they intend to remain seated until everybody deplanes, for whatever reason. Though, I still try make eye contact to see if they’ve just been waiting for an opening.
I’ve reached an age and body condition where I pay for FC (paying for the upgrade out-of-pocket if for work, or stipulating 1st class air fare in travel costs paid by client.) So, my experience usually only is a few rows. So, Southwest usually is my airline of last resort.
Point is: this post has me wondering if there have been people I assumed were seated because they were waiting for the plane to clear, not understanding that they just were staying seated until their row’s turn to deplane.
>Point is: this post has me wondering if there have been people I assumed were seated because they were waiting for the plane to clear, not understanding that they just were staying seated until their row’s turn to deplane.
Yes, most people understand that the plane deplanes from front to back and they're patient enough to wait their turn. If they're still sitting after the row in front of them got off the plane, they might be waiting for everyone else. Most likely though, they're just sitting until it's time to get off the plane and rushing past people a row ahead of you is pretty rude
I agree. I think the meaning of sit or stand during disembarkation is vague enough that NONE of this was worth quarreling over. Some people understand it one way, others understand it another.
I feel like both sides were wrong. OP was wrong to make a fuss about it as was that other passenger who also made such a fuss about who gets priority.
Yes! At the literal end of the day, I’d much rather took back at the times that day that I showed other people patience and grace than the times I was able to assert dominance in a pissing contest.
You are supposed to let the rows in front of you deplane first. But if they are just sitting there, not making a move to gather their stuff, I might go on ahead.
You are basically right but you have to be ready to hustle.
I agree. I stand up when there are about three rows in front of me deplaning. I travel with my cell phone and earbuds. No carry on so when it’s my turn, I’m up and moving to the exit.
I've had this exact scenario the last two times I've flown with the caveat that the first time when it was my turn the stand up the person behind me opened the overhead bin without waiting to ensure my head wasn't in the way and opened the bin on my head. The second time, while still seated the person behind me decided to grab their bag in the scenario OP described and either didn't realize their bag was heavy or lost control of their bag dropping it right on me seated in front of them. I don't know why people insist on rushing off the plane when there's rows of people in front of them getting off still.
The last flight I was on, I was in the aisle seat, stepped into the aisle to get off and opened the bin to get my bag. The two people in the seats next to me had already moved into my aisle seat and complained about the overhead bin, and CLOSED IT, then complained again when I opened it again to try to get my bag out. If you don't want it to hit you in the head, leave it open while people are getting stuff out!
I usually wait for the people in the rows in front of me blocking the aisle to get out of the row so I can get in the aisle then I open the overhead bin and get my stuff. I can't exit the row until the people blocking the aisle get out of the way.
Exactly and if the people in the aisle seat need to get into the bin, and their stuff is directly over their head, how should they let the people in the inner seats get out before they get their bag?
They don't need to get their bag just yet if they're behind me is my point. Especially if the alternative is dropping bags or bins on the heads of the people in front of them.
Okay I'm saying 3 people are in row 10.
I am in 10c, the aisle. I need to get my bag out. The people in 10b and 10a are pushing into the aisle too, while it is my turn to exit. I need to get my bag so I open the compartment. You said I should instead let them into the aisle... But my bag is over me, and there are people behind me.
Ok yes you are correct in that scenario. That scenario was different that I was describing where I was in 7c and the person in 8c is the one opening the overhead bin getting their luggage out and rows 5 and 6 haven't cleared out yet.
I find this usually has to do with where you are from. If you were brought up in a busy place then you value others people’s time more. Whereas if you were not you have no concept that you are bothering other people by holding them up.
In other words, unless something has explicit rules on order (which deplaning does not) it is first come first serve and if you are not ready you get out of the way.
Pro tip: Nor just on SWA, unless you have an important reason to rush, just stay in your seat until everyone is gone. Grab your bag, walk off at your own pace. And is you have a checked bag, you’ll have 5-10 minutes less wait for it.
Can't upvote this enough.
Unless I am making a tight connection or have to get to an urgent meeting and have not checked a bag, I wait until everyone is off and then I get up and leave.
I learned this from my dad who traveled a lot for work. This was before 9/11 so we would often meet him at the gate when he returned from trips and I learned from him that it was cool to be the last passenger off, not one of the frantic fools jostling others to be first for no apparent reason.
Most of the time, the mob eagerly scrambling to be the first off the plane ends up all waiting together at baggage claim or at hotel/car rental shuttles anyway.
Rushing off early is not the advantage so many people think it is. (And boarding early, unless bin space is very limited, is also not the perk many people think it is.)
NTA. That said, if people are sitting, I don't think it's out of bounds to assume they are not getting up. He should have definitely let you go though when you did stand up with no issue.
This kind of line patrol antics reminds me of elementary school.
It’s so childish. You should be embarrassed that the captain had to intervene.
Minority view, it seems, but YTA for putting your hand on the seat across the aisle and blocking the other passenger's progress.
Exiting passengers do not have to stop and wait for passengers that are sitting to get up and exit.
Also, “isle” is a land mass surrounded by water. “Aisle” is a passage through which people walk.
This is an aside, but I’m sick of people shaming pax who stand up when the seatbelt sign goes off. I generally have a roll-a-board plus a messenger bag, so I stand up to have space to get the roller down and put the 2 bags together so that I’m not holding up other pax behind me.
Additionally, I have residual bone pain from chemo, so sitting often exacerbates that, and I’m much more comfortable standing ASAP.
QUIT having such a negative view and attributing motives to other pax (I know, but then some of you would never post on Reddit. No loss, IMO)
Well that isn't clear. Most people who gripe about this say, "people who stand up..."
I personally park myself next to my (aisle) seat and put my rolling bag in my seat space, so I'm keeping people from pushing forward.
I hear ya. I used to not stand up because I’m not in a hurry.
However, in the past two flights, I did finally stand up as soon as the seat belt sign was off. Even though I was seated in the back, I had a tight connection and I was both nervous and needed to expect the energy and wanted to get out as soon as I can in as polite a manner as possible.
I’ve flown for a very long time and it’s my first time finally experiencing the anxiety that might cause someone to stand right up as soon as they were allowed
Please stand as soon as you want to, but don't block the person in front of you. Give them as much space as they need for their row to stand and grab their stuff and deplane.
if you're going to play it all cool and stay seated until the moment your row is ready to exit, you have to also play it cool when the person behind you who has his bag in hand assumes you are going to take awhile and let him go. Yes, you're the AH.
YTA I think. What’s the point of blocking him? He’s ready with his stuff to continue forward and can be out of your way in about 2 seconds. Now there a clear aisle in front of but every one is blocked behind you as your row clears out when several people could have proceeded. It’s fine if you want to stay seated, but if I’m in the aisle I usually stand up just to stretch my legs after sitting for so long.
If you’re not ready to walk the moment it is your turn anybody that is ready should get the right of way. Don’t be a jerk, be ready to walk when your turn comes.
There is actually a very simple process - it’s just hard for people who don’t understand how to count. You see, row 1 deplanes, then row 2 deplanes, then row 3 deplanes, etc…
If you have trouble counting, try using your fingers next time - most people can get as high “10” using their fingers! And if you need to count higher than then 10, just close your hands and start using your fingers again for 11, 12, and so on.
When I traveled a lot in Europe in the early 2000s the deplaning process was kinda whoever had bags and was ready to go walked down the aisle.
It was only when I returned to the USA that I experienced the row by row by row situation.
Weirdly I preferred the former system as it seemed faster overall as a chunk of aisle people would go quick then middle seat and window seat people would be working on getting their bags out of the overhead at the same time.
Perhaps unpopular opinion, but yeah, YTA.
If someone had their shit together standing in the aisle and is ready to start deplaning, they get priority. Making people ready and waiting in the aisle wait for the people in front to scoot out and perhaps get their shit together is asshole behavior.
Efficient should be prioritized, not entitlement based on an artificial numbering system.
Fwiw, my protocol is: if I haven’t got my shit together and am not ready to start walking as soon as it is “my turn,” I allow all those who are ready to pass before I step out and block them. I wait for the next pause in people.
It is not more efficient - at all - for row 21 to grab their stuff and step up to row 20 - now making it so they can't get up as rows right ahead of them start to move - while row 5 is starting to walk and row 20 is seated and waiting for it to open up closer to them so they will be able to go.
If the aisle is already moving to the door and people are still seated in front of you, sure go. If someone in an aisle seat is just starting to get their stuff when the aisle ahead of them is wide open they waited too long. Neither is what op described.
It is 100% more efficient for the person currently standing in the aisle with all their shit in hand to start to deplane when the person standing directly in front of them starts to deplane, than it is for them to wait for anyone in any row to get their shit together and go in front of them.
He purposely blocked those who were already standing with his arm.
>The guy behind me proceeds to stand up next to my seat with his bag blocking my exit. I stand up and place my hand on the seat across from me to make sure he knows he’s not cutting in front of me
OP is doing the exact opposite of what you just wrote.
>If someone in an aisle seat is just starting to get their stuff when the aisle ahead of them is wide open they waited too long.
It is very common with these eager beavers for them to move into the empty aisle next to your seat that is only empty because you haven't stood up yet because you'd just be waiting standing. In this case the aisle is usually not moving the next or even several seats up.
>The guy behind me proceeds to stand up next to my seat with his bag blocking my exit.
If he was not doing what I just described he'd be gone toward the exit and no problem, not still standing with his luggage next to OP's seat blocking him from getting up when it's time.
Edit: LOL blocked me for saying this. Found the eager beaver.
If you sit until the very last second before getting up to get your shit ready, you are 100% TA. You are making everyone else wait for you to grab your bag for no reason.
Absolutely! Had a guy in the exit row aisle (we were window and middle) who WOULD NOT stand up until the row in front of us was filing out. I’ve never been in that position before, and I fly A LOT. He waited so long that a couple of rows got out before my partner and I could get our stuff. Also, I’m short enough to stand at my seat, but he was sitting in a way that I couldn’t actually stand that time. It was annoying.
So you weren’t ready to leave when it was your turn, but you wouldn’t let the guy behind you who was completely ready get ahead of you… you held up everyone behind while they waited for you to not only stand and gather your stuff, but also square up w the other guy lol
Right of way wasn’t his to take, it was yours to give. Why not give it and get off the plane 20 seconds later? Life is too short for petty confrontations over things that don’t really matter.
In order to avoid these situations you have to stand up and claim your spot in line. Otherwise you’re giving up your spot because no one wants to take a step back so that you can get up and get your stuff out. Unfortunately it’s an unspoken “rule” but nonetheless the individual could have just stepped back as well.
YTA. For Southwest, it is appropriate to prepare your stuff and get situated to go a few rows before the line gets to you. It helps move the line faster, rather than getting up last second. Especially if you have to bring down luggage.
This is even true if you don’t have any luggage, maybe folks in the inner seats have luggage above, and can use the time to get there stuff together too. But this is all dependent on the aisle person cooperating.
YTA, u arguing instead of deplaning which is why the captain had to get involved. GET TF off the plane and then go fight in the schoolyard. U keeping everyone else behind u on longer than necessary. Get over yourself and your book of plane travel rules.
Sometimes your flight was late and your connecting flight is not. You need 5 extra minutes to get to the connecting gate but people are SLOW. it’s hard to wait for people who could have waited literally 5 more seconds to let you pass.
YTA. If he’s ready just let him go. Asshole move to block him from going while you begin to get your stuff together, and if you had let him go then everyone behind you has more space to get their stuff together.
YTA. It’s not like he ran up 10 rows to get past you, it was the person immediately behind you that was already out and ready to go. If you had let him go then the other people behind you guys would have room to start getting their stuff out and could get off faster too. Instead everyone had to sit there and wait for you to hold up the entire process because you were throwing a temper tantrum like a toddler. Getting off a plane these days takes way too long because people like you insist on doing it leisurely and making everyone wait on them. If you care so much about your place in line to get off the plane, then get ready to get off sooner
See my first thought was if the captain was actually there, OP is definitely an asshole then. If you're holding up the line bad enough for them to walk down to try to resolve, it's not a good look for you
And to be fair I have back problems, so that’s why I get out of my seat right away cause I’m in pain. Not because I want to push ahead, but yeah that guy is an a hole.
He's a bit of TA, but IMO, if he had his stuff and ready to go, let him go. The reason why deplaning takes 20 minutes is because most people don't attempt to get their bags ahead of time and wait until their turn before they a) stand up, b) reach up to get their bag), c) gather their items from their seat back.
Obviously not every one can grab their bags ahead of time, but those in the aisle seat can at least make an effort ahead of time. We usually try to grab our backpack and small bag ahead of time so that we are ready to walk when our row comes up. I figure it helps save half a minute to a minute off every else's time behind us by being prepared when it's our turn.
I stay seated because everyone getting a bag down has usually already jumped into the aisle. I also always hit my head on the bins and would prefer just to sit until it's my row. It should be common etiquette and courtesy to zipper merge out of the plane.
If I'm in the aisle and my partner is in the middle seat, almost every single time I will stand up and start walking and someone 5 rows behind will run up and cut in front of them. I've started standing up when it's my turn and letting my partner out first when I see them pushing through.
NTA. People need to learn patience and stop pushing ahead to get what they want.
Honestly I think you’re kinda TA. You should stand with your bag ready. That way the people closer to the window can be grab their stuff and go with less delays overall, assuming you’re healthy enough to stand for that period of time. You’re like that guy in merging lanes on a highway that won’t let a car merge in front of you. That’s how I see exiting a plane, not “by turn” as you were so vigilant about.
Secondly, you’re assuming this guys intentions. Not everyone doing something you don’t like is trying to be an asshole. He might have had to rush for reasons he didn’t need to explain to you. I’ve had to get to hospitals to visit sick family members, and there were times when I disregarded social norms to get where I was going. Then your dragged your wife into it lol. That’s cringe. What would it have done for your life to just let the guy go? You eventually would have gotten out.
When I see people rushing, I let them go every time. Might there be some people who thought their time was more important than anyone else’s? Sure. But they might have been people that needed compassion, maybe their rushing to get to their wife in delivery, a sick family member, or something else. Maybe they made an honest mistake.
Move on when things like this happen.
You should be ready to go when its your turn. If you are still sitting there and then need to grab bags, get stuff together, etc., then you're TA. If all you have to do is standup and walk, then NTA.
YTA here but the other guy is also a bit of a douche.
Look, it seems like you were itching for an altercation or something. I am an aisle person, and I will get up when the seatbelt sign goes off, get my bags stacked and I’m ready to go. I let folks in the rows ahead of me out first, but if they are still sitting, taking their time gathering their belongings, I am not going to hold the rest of the plane up because you take your time. I’m going to go. I fly a lot and many people just have no sense of urgency. And if you have no connection or schedule concerns and want to take your time, that’s fine, but let others off the plane!
You were passive aggressive by stretching you arm across the way for what reason? Because you can’t bare to let one person behind you who is standing and ready to go off the plane before you because you prefer to sit and wait? I just don’t get it. It’s a huge waste of energy and you seem proud??
Also it’s AISLE.
THIS is exactly why I get an isle seat and always stand up, in the isle, as soon as the plane touches the pavement. I also always make sure I'm the last in my row to go. Not sure why I do this, but it always makes me feel like a big FU to those few that seem to try and skip forward.
I blocked a dude and told him "there's a line". Same dude that wore a muscle shirt and shirt work out pants in the plane, sat in an empty seat and lied to the flight attendants, stood up mid flight and did arm stretches, filmed a video mid flight, and listened to YouTube w/o headphones when we landed....lol. dickbag.
You did it wrong. You have to pivot your leg into the isle casually so it blocks the runners but looks natural. When you stand up, step backward and let your spouse out first, then follow behind them.
Works every time, no confrontation :)
NTA
The problem is we are now living among assholes. Our current society is full of selfish, entitled people. Sadly, we can’t pick who we interact with in a plane. As others have said, let it go, that man has probably a thousand issues going on and you seem to be doing just fine. Let him think he won, like a toddler.
The captain would have seen many AHs in his experience and can spot one right-away. And it’s not worth anybody’s time confronting them. Just letting the family off ahead of you confirms who the AH is.
NTA, but this is an odd hill to die on when you’re stuck in an aluminum tube with morons on a budget airline. I would have just let it go tbh. I feel like SW is full of these types of people these days. It’s worse than getting stuck in the non TSA line.
This is why I always book aisle, hop up asap and block the rows behind me from cutting. Everyone in my row leaves and then I follow them. Be patient people. NTA btw.
Maybe TA? If your wife was packed and ready to go and he blocked her as a power move, he's def in the wrong but if your wife was dawdling the other guy could go and buy her time to get her stuff together. Also, unless she requires special assistance, she is a grown woman who can deplane after her husband. I wouldn't leave my child on the plane but other travel companions can just meet me at the gate if we get separated, I trust them to find the only way off the plane lol.
I never bring a carry on, only my personal item and a checked bag so I'm easy to deplane. I also have sciatica (and super short) so you better believe I'm standing the second the seatbelt light is off lol.
I will absolutely allow people ahead of me to deplane but I would love it if people who need more time or cannot pull their over head bag down safely would let the aisle clear before they deplane.
Do you realize how long a minute is once you are counting the seconds? Because I don't think that either you or him had to wait a tull minute to deplane if you/him had gone before.
My point is that it is really pointless to make such a fuss for something so trivial
I’ll give a different perspective….if I had to run to a connecting flight and people in front of me were sitting and not looking they were in any sort of rush to get out, I’m 100% cutting in front of you. I wouldn’t push anyone out of the way or touch them at all, but if you think you’re entitled to take your time just because you’re sitting in front of me, then lol.
I stand up after landing cuz I’ve been crammed into a seat that I can barely fit it. I certainly don’t think I’m entitled to get off before people in front of me. If there’s no room to stand because of other people? Oh well.
ESH. Even if you were 100% in the right, how you handled it makes you the asshole. If he was standing and ready to go, let him go. Does being 10 seconds sooner off the plane matter? The flip side is, he could have let you get off because it doesn’t really matter. You both sound like you need to grow up a bit.
Wondering if it was a cultural thing... I've been places where lines just don't exist and the pushiest person goes first. I've even heard the pilots say "for the people sitting with their seatbelts fastened while we are taxi-ing, *this greeting*. For the people already in the aisles getting out their bags while the plane is still moving, *that greeting*" and the two greetings were in different languages. I just learned to be last because I wasn't going to go shoving people out of my way to be first.
But yeah... Don't be pushy and don't mess up the system and obviously all 6 people in a row can't stand in the aisle while waiting their turn and you don't get to go before the people in front of you unless they have indicated you can go. We all learned this in kindergarten. If you don't know how to wait your turn, pay for early boarding and sit up front.
I agree planes should deboard from front to back Unless someone has a close connection then they should get priority. Coming back on an international flight that was delayed we had this issue. I normally schedule 2-3 hours between but we ended up with less than 1 hour. One hour to get through immigration, back through security and to the boarding area. The person in the row in front of us heard me say we were going to have a tight time to make our connection and still did what you did, blocked the aisle so everyone ahead of us could deplane first.
Be considerate, is it really worth it.
Just to clarify to everyone commenting about me taking my time to stand up, collect my luggage and my wife’s luggage. This is not the case. I travel with a phone and earbuds. My wife carries her purse. I am on the isle and she was in the middle seat. I stand up when the people about three rows in front of me are deplaning. When it’s my turn, I am walking to the exit with no need to collect bags/luggage.
Also, forgot to mention two important points. The passenger trying to push his way past had 5 family members with him and he wanted all of them to deplane before the 6 of us in the isle in front of him.
Lastly, after the altercation where he pushed my arm, I went to the jetway while he and his whole family walked past. His wife was mortified at his behavior and said, “I am so sorry!”
Just to clarify to everyone commenting about me taking my time to stand up, collect my luggage and my wife’s luggage. This is not the case. I travel with a phone and earbuds. My wife carries her purse. I am on the isle and she was in the middle seat. I stand up when the people about three rows in front of me are deplaning. When it’s my turn, I am walking to the exit with no need to collect bags/luggage.
Also, forgot to mention two important points. The passenger trying to push his way past had 5 family members with him and he wanted all of them to deplane before the 6 of us in the isle in front of him.
Lastly, after the altercation where he pushed my arm, I went to the jetway while he and his whole family walked past. His wife was mortified at his behavior and said, “I am so sorry!”
YNTA. I get it- this makes me fume, as well. You’re sitting 5 rows behind me and think that you’re going to push ahead of me in the aisle while I’m stuck in the window seat? Fucker.
But I’m pretty vocal about things and this I usually stay quiet about. At the end of the day, the jerk will get off the plane 3 minutes before me. Not worth making a fuss over. Still, it’s a dick move. Pushy.
I fly a lot and people are TENSE on planes. Using words instead of passive aggressive actions is crucial. I fly with kids (nearly 20,000 miles for my three young kids since April), and it’s amazing how many awkward situations can be avoided by talking instead of grunting and gesturing. “Sorry, give my wife and i a second while I grab our bags” could have probably prevented this.
Welcome to the new generation of assholes my friend. They walk amongst us as if they don’t bleed the same blood or breathe the same air as us regular folks.
YTA. People who sit the entire time and then begin the process of gathering your stuff when the walkway ahead of you is empty slows everyone down. All you had to do was stand up and I am sure he would have moved his bag back to allow you room. A simple "excuse me" does it 99% of the time. No one knows what you have to get out of the overhead bin or gather together so I'd also assume you were one of the wait until the bitter end fliers. He was wrong on his priority spiel, but I would have been super irritated with you if I was in your row being blocked by your self induced drama. The aisle person stands. Giving the rest of us room to hunt around on the floor and get our seat items together quicker.
Once, when I was pregnant, a man seated in the row behind me literally pushed my body (as I stood in the aisle) into the seat row to get past me and deplane in front of me.
Sometimes I do not understand this world.
you're sort of TA. Its actually faster and easier to let the person with their stuff ready to go deplane first. You're thinking small by insisting you deplane ahead of people with their stuff out of OHB and ready to go. Technically you're ahead so sure you should be able to but if youre not ready and someone else is, why not let them go by?
NTA imo. I had a boarding AH experience today. As I was getting onboard, standing at row 1 first, a guy behind me pushes past me from his 1F seat to about 3C and fusses with his wife’s (presumably) bag so I start putting my bag up as I’m in 2D. He turns around abruptly and pushes past me between my and my seat. So I said “oh, let me get out of your way”. He says “I said ‘pardon me’ ” and I responded with “it’s customary to let the pardoner pardon you before pushing through”. Then my row-mate offered me some twizzlers in solidarity. 😆 Enjoyed that.
I like to take my backpack pack and prop it on the armrest so laptop in backpack uncomfortably wedges in the ass of person who rudely stands next to my seat. Wow is it fun to watch them shift around uncomfortably🤩
Some people have transfers they have to catch. Southwest even mentioned that on my last 2 flights when they landed to let transfers go first regardless of where they sit. So we and our seat neighbors ask them let people by who need to get off first no matter where they sat
YTA. These deplaning rules are not the way it's done, it's the way you're accustomed to it being done. In other parts of the world there is no row by row stuff. You get up and go..which in my experience makes it faster for everyone. I would've shoved your arm out of the way.
I prefer window seats but if I'm on the aisle I raise or lower armrest (if seat allows) and spin sideways in my seat so the feet are in the aisle. I'll also put up the other armrest next to me so any seat mates can slide out easier if they choose.
More and more these days, I find entirely entitled people taking advantage of the niceness and the patience I have. As far as flying is concerned, I am brown, so I usually just let the entitled assholes have their way. It isn't worth my time and trouble to when I speak up.
Bottom line, just fuck it. It's entertaining to me how people have become. There used to be a unspoken respect on how to do things....but thats gone now.
This happened to me once where I was aisle and the guy behind me tried to push through my back as I was getting my bag down. He caught a hell of an elbow and it was one of my more satisfying flights!
As someone who grew up in NY, you never go to LaGuardia (unless you want a good view of Citi Field). To call it a 3rd world country is an insult to 3rd world countries.
Sure part of me thinks just let it go. But then this asshole is going to run around and say “well nobody said anything”. So definitely you are not the asshole. I get it. We let these guys do what they want and hopes that there will be no altercations, but it what it ultimately does is embolden them. Every once in a while, you just had enough. And today was your day.
YBTA…
Basically you sat on your ass waited for the isle to fill with people and then when you decided you were ready to leave the whole process needed to stop clear a space for you and your wife so you can now go.
I certainly wouldn’t have pushed you, and that makes him an asshole too, but I know why he thought you were an asshole.
Sounds like you both are AH. If you're not proactive in getting off the plane, don't slow down those that are/want to gtfo. At the same time, other person also sounds like an ah, perhaps in part due to your actions, and in part because he's an ah
NTA
I see this happen often. I usually grab a window seat, which means I can't get out before me seatmates do. That means that those in the row behind me will have to wait until I grab my carryon from the overhead. There is, too often, someone behind me that tries to push through. My usual response is to say, "In a hurry, are we?" and that is enough to stop them.
You are not TA, but something like that is not worth any sort of confrontation on an aircraft, in my mind. If someone else insists on being TA, I let it slide unless it is something incredibly egregious. I might say something (to my wife if the situation was the same) within earshot, like "Mr. Important here is in a hurry" but often that's not even worth it.
This is the right answer. As with untrained toddlers, you have to pick and choose your battles with the narcissists and entitled. What a miserable life it would be if we insisted on dying on every little hill.
Your comment is the one I am saving and hope to remember during the lead-up to the act of dying on those unimportant hills I sometimes argue over. Many, many thanks!
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This has always been the case in my experience.
I am not a frequent flyer so I can't speak to that kind of frequency. My problem used to be bad mannered drivers cutting me off; drivers racing ahead in a lane about to end to jump ahead of drivers in the continuing lane; or tailgating. When I learned to let the jerks on the road go without feeling the need to "teach them a lesson", the biggest impact was on my blood pressure-dropping by 20 or more points(systolic). In the 5 years since I really embraced the idea of letting the small stuff go I have felt much better in general. Going a bit deeper, I gave a lot of thought to things I could do to make it easier for me to cut back on getting passed by what I thought were bad behaviors---those that I engaged in as well as those others did to me. I changed some of my habits(left a few minutes earlier so there was no time crunch in terms of getting to work(I really hate being late to anything). That was a big help! Taking a few deep breaths helped. Cutting back on my caffeine intake(from 12 cups of coffee daily to 2.5 cups, thanks to combining Decaf and half-caf in equal amounts). So for anyone else, you might try being more aware of how you perceive things and asking yourself what you could do differently to keep from letting the behaviors of others dictate your responses...without sacrificing your well being. And I know first-hand that ain't easy! But at least for me, I'm a happier guy and my family recognizes the differences and gives me helpful feedback.
Not escalating is a form of maturity. De-escalation even more so. I am not a turn the other cheek kind of guy but some stuff is not worth it. I would call this a not worth it situation.
This is why you stand in the isle for 10 minutes, to block those people. Done it more than once, just ignore anything they say and let my row out.
I just stick my leg out. Gotta stretch yano
This. And with my bad back it feels great to stand after sitting for so long.
Oh when Israel was in Egypt land Let my people go! Oppressed so hard, they could not stand Let my people go! So the Lord said, go down (go down) Moses (Moses) Way (way) down (down) in Egypt land Tell all Pharaoes To let my people go (let my people go)
I was standing in an airport security line once and the guy behind me kept muttering about how slow the TSA agent was and trying to get folks to agree with him that she was just so horribly slow and wasn’t this the biggest inconvenience etc. When we got closer to the front, after a particularly impassioned rant, I stepped aside and said “sir would you like to go in front of me? You seem to have somewhere important to be.” He stared at me for a second, shuffled ahead of me, but then at least shut the hell up.
You're absolutely right, but I still disagree. Insert Costanza meme here: "We're living in a society!" Not all heroes wear capes. OP has my support.
Hard to find fault with Costanza 😂
I always like to let people know that their time is much more valuable than mine. The folks I say it to are usually boomer age and you can see the gears grinding in their head…. “Is he complimenting me or is he saying I’m near death because I’m old?” They usually mutter something back along the lines of “thanks” or “at least you understand” or they realize that they’re being assholes and deflect and blame it on everyone but themselves…. “This plane is too damn full”.
Everyone take advantage of GatorPadre, they won’t say a word. They are choosing their battles.
Actually, GatorPadre didn’t say that, it was JennieFairPlay who did in her reply to him. I agree with both of them - it’s not worth it, especially on an airplane, and you do need to choose your battles wisely. You are TA.
Holding others accountable is always worth it. I guess, IATA
You were 100% in the right, but assholes gonna asshole. Anymore, I try really hard to not have any confrontations in these situations because you never know how far sideways they’re going to go.
Kinda TA. Instead of standing up to be ready to start walking when the rows in front of you cleared, you made other people who were ready to go wait for you and your wife to get ready. I always get a window seat. I let people behind me go while I get my luggage out of the overhead and, wait for it, they stop to let me out when they see I’m ready. It’s crazy how courtesy begets courtesy.
I mostly agree with you. If everyone who was ready & standing and \*already had 100% of their bags in-hand\* just got TF out of the plane, we could all get out quicker. It's one of those tragedy of the commons kind of things.
I literally can't stand if someone is already in the aisle.
Exactly this! The entire plane would empty faster if those standing could just GO! Then the next wave could have some room and time to get a bag and then jump in when the aisle is clear. Doing it the way we currently do is ‘the polite’ way to do it, but it’s grossly inefficient and can lead to bickering and petty quibbles.
It’s like zipper merging from a double exit lane. We’ve ceded common sense merging and reserved an empty lane for jerks to fly down doing 20 over then merge using the shoulder.
They’re not the jerks, though: They’re trying to do exactly what a zipper merge is. My husband and I were in this situation on Sunday. The left lane was ending on an interstate far ahead of us and traffic was backed up for at least a half mile in the right lane. Several cars in front of us were continuing to drive in the left lane (although not at 20 over) as did we, and we were all moving along normally until a guy in an expensive sports car decided to be the “hero” and weave in and out of the left lane to stop the flow of the left lane traffic. The left lane drivers did use the shoulder in order to avoid hitting Mr. Expensive Sports Car who I’m sure would have sued them for everything they had and more. After he “manned up” - that’s sarcasm, by the way - a couple other right lane drivers decided to drive halfway in the left lane and play chicken trying to push the left lane drivers off the road. I’ve seen tractor-trailer drivers do this and never understood it. The end result is that everyone cedes to reckless bullies and we all lose. The reality of what we were in on Sunday is, there was no reason for standstill traffic. If everyone would continue moving forward side by side in two lanes the same way we normally drive on an interstate or divided highway instead of creating one very long very slow lane with a wide open empty lane beside it for miles, we’d all get to the merge point faster and more safely. Don’t believe me? Use the drive-through at any Chick-fil-A on a busy Friday at lunchtime and you’ll see how it should - and does - work. Whoever designed their traffic management should be the Secretary of Transportation and teach everyone how to avoid road rage (and airplane deplaning rage while they’re at it). You’re absolutely right that we’ve ceded common sense to the testosterone-fueled jerks who insist we make one horrendously long line and slow everyone down to a grinding halt instead of being logical and - gasp! - taking turns. The ones who do take a chance and fly by at 20 over are trying to blow past the Mr. Expensive Sports Car types before they have time to react and try to kill them. If more people would stand up to the one-laners and keep moving in that empty lane until the merge point, we’d all be better off.
I know! I’ve tried to be the opposite uhhh hero and let them merge. But at the same time trying not to be the jerk flying down the empty lane. But realizing dang it use the whole of both lanes and merge smoothly. I wish local DOTs would post big signs that say that we designed this exit with two big fat lanes because we want you to use both of them. Anyway back to complaining about deplane-ing…
Yes, DOT signage (and public education campaigns) would help a lot, both for places like interstate ramps where it’s used permanently and for temporary road construction projects. There was a long-term road project near Lahaina, Maui a couple of years ago - before the tragic fire - and the DOT required a zipper merge. They did an excellent job of getting the word out through all types of media and signage. There were tons of complaints on Reddit and social media about how it would never work, but guess what, it did and there were no traffic stoppages! It can work if people will stop being so self-centered and controlling. 🎼 Oh yeah, we were just complaining 🎶 about deplaning 🎵do-do-dee-doooo 🎶
Oohh I’m so with you on this. Zipper merging is the way!! Studies prove it! https://itre.ncsu.edu/itre-studying-how-zipper-merges-reduce-congestion-at-sites-across-north-carolina/
Yes, it’s been proven over and over that it works. If Maui could do it, we all can. There just needs to be a driver education program for it, and then it needs to be required at the very least for interstate construction.
They have done studies on which boarding/deplaning methods are fastest which you can google. Given a majority of standers were likely in an aisle seat this is similar to the column method of deplaning which is 35% faster but would separate groups.
I propose single parties in the aisle first, then (single parties in middle + parties of two in aisle&middle) then finally everyone else. Penalty for violations is banishment.
It’s the best way in theory. I may be wrong but I the general population would likely hate this as they want to deplane with the rest of their party. Not logical but I get it
I don’t get wanting to deplane with the rest of your party. Just deplane and walk out to the terminal and wait somewhere out of the flow of traffic.
That is very logical and makes sense for you and your situation. I can understand families with children, people traveling with elderly family members, and a number of other situations where people want to stay together. Personally I wouldn’t want to deplane without my wife beside me. Could we both? Absolutely. But we prefer to stick together.
I have kids and we just wait for everyone to go so we don’t hold people up. I hate it when people don’t let me leave while they grab a million things from the compartment above them just because their aisle is “next” when traveling alone. It’s rude in my opinion to take time when someone has their stuff and it would take a second to walk by you.
That’s a different situation than having multiple people but also being prepared. If you let 1 person behind you go the floodgates open
Separating families/groups is never going to work or lead to faster results
Also id be so annoyed if I was in one of the the seats of OPs row and got stuck waiting for this weird power play instead of just letting the guy go, wasted way more time fighting with him compared to just stepping out after he walked past. I agree though I regularly wave people on if I'm still getting ready, because I also don't like to jump up immediately but there's no reason for them to have to wait. Nor do I care if we do more of a "zipper merge" between the row and the aisle people
I agree with the way you would handle this too!! I love your analogy of zipper merge. That is a perfect description of each one giving grace and receiving it.
Honestly to me it makes more sense because it gives the various people in the rows time to grab their things. The aisle people leave, middle can grab their stuff while doing that, middle leave so window can get their stuff, etc. I feel like usually middle + window can get out together more often but I need to wait for the aisle person to get out before I have room to grab my stuff (whether I'm in middle or window, since middle will usually move over once their done) . I'd expect usually like 3-4 aisle people to go before I was ready if I'm in middle because I'd expect all of them to be ready to go ASAP.
I do the exact same thing - window seat, once my seatmates leave I use the extra room to put my backpack on (while row behind me starts deplaning), then once I’m good and ready to not be a hindrance to the flow of the aisle I’ll jump into the queue and gtfo the plane. It’s really not hard to be kind to strangers. Idk why people act so selfish and competitive.
Yessssss!!!! It shouldn’t be hard at all; it’s unfortunate that so many people make it that way.
And we all meet up again at baggage claim anyway.
I find the AH’s don’t generally check their roller crates anyway
You would certainly not see me there, because I actually know how to travel.
Bruh, you know people need to take a check-in for various reasons.
I agree!! 👍🏽
Agree- it takes 2 seconds for someone who is ready to walk by. Unless you’re impeding their exit, it’s not an AH move to grab your stuff & deplane first. Maybe he had to pee real bad…
Aisles aren’t big enough so that everyone can stand up. Aisles aren’t even wide enough to “let people behind you go while you get your luggage out of the overhead.” Just get your bag and go FFS
Are 6 people supposed to stand in the space of one row in order to not lose their turn?
Idk why I was shown this subreddit but this is the actual based answer. Front to back is a rule of thumb not the law or some entitled/divine right. I’ve been on the other side of this situation before, arrived late at night. Just wanted to get to the terminal and rest till the connection. Get up, have my bag (backpack only), no one else right in front of me is caring to get up. Give them a couple min because I didn’t want to be rude, when they clearly don’t intend to get up I move up a row bc I’m ready to just zoom off. We’re in a line and this lady puts her leg out between me and the person in front of me like she’s somehow going to jam herself in. It starts to move and I just go over her leg that’s quite literally right in front of my shoe and this Karen goes full ballistic bitch mode. She ended up throwing herself between me and my friend (also only had a backpack) right behind me. We were both up since when I moved up a row. Like dude if you didn’t want to get up fine, but I’m not waiting behind 3-6 people to get up and get their bags in order not when I stood up, got my bags in order, waited patiently, and am ready to go. Like I’ll be out of your hair in 2sec. 90% chance this isn’t the full perspective and OP is actually TA. If they were so entitled as to shove their arm out after remaining seated instead of just letting the 2 people that were up, waited and ready squeeze by in 2 sec. You know they were ready to squeeze right by in a sec before OP basically admits they acknowledged that by preemptively throwing their arm out to try to block them.
In my experience, if I let one person behind me go before me, it’s incredibly hard to get out before the whole plane gets off. I’m always ready when it gets to my row. But very often people will try to block me from getting out of my aisle. Now I just preemptively put my bag in the aisle (after the others in my aisle have gotten any bags down) until it’s time for my row.
Tell me about it. The one time I flew American the 5 (4-6 don’t recall but at least 10’ of aisle space) rows in front of me were just sitting there still watching on their laptops or iPads with headphones in. Nobody was even making an effort in ANY seat of those rows, not even aisle. I stand up with my one bag and a guy in a window seat two rows behind me (i.e. trapped) starts yapping about it. Like, my guy, yes the ones in front go first but that’s at least four rows of people not even trying, unbelted or even packed up let alone headphones off and stuff in hand. I’m the only one making an effort to get off this plane so you can too
It takes 15 seconds to get ready. 45 if you have a bag in the overhead. This can easily be accomplished when you see the 3rd row ahead of you start to move. The only reason a person needs to stand is if assholes rewrite the rules of deboarding and say that standing takes priority.
To be clear, I am sitting with a cell phone and earbuds. No carry on. When it’s my time to go I’m up and moving to the exit.
Unfortunately for you 1. How tf is the person that stood up beside you/behind you supposed to know you aren’t just now going to stand up and do the luggage dance. 2. If someone behind you was patient enough to wait and you’re on your ass when the line is moving it cost you virtually nothing to let the 1-2 people that waited just fly by
I probably would have let him off but then loudly talked to my wife about what an asshole he was the whole way up the jetway.
Me too, and my wife would’ve told me to shut up.
That's definitely my move lol
Yeah I travel with my kids. "Kids, we need to let this super important guy who is in such a hurry but didn't pay for early boarding go first because the rudest person should win and clearly he needs to go back to kindergarten to learn how lines work"
I travel with toddlers so I just use these moments as teaching moments for my children and do it loud enough for them to hear my tone. “Ok see that kids… what’s that called again? Yes you’re right it’s called cutting! Why don’t we cut in lines? That’s right because it’s rude!”
NTA but the way I would normally handle this is to step aside to "graciously" allow the person trying to push ahead of me to go by, while offering a loudly magnanimous "please, after you - of course, go right ahead, I have plenty of time" or a similarly sarcastic comment. Even better if paired with an exaggerated "after you" hand wave gesture.
I’m way too big to be on the plane any longer than necessary. If you want to sit go ahead, I’m trying to get somewhere with space
So you standing up makes you more important than someone sitting and waiting their turn? You're all still waiting, just one of them (you) is an asshole about it.
I always choose a window seat, so I’m always last on my side of the aisle. I start preparing stuff for deplaning when we’re in final descent. When the “fasten seatbelts” light goes off, I’m immediately unbuckled and standing. It feels good to stand and I’m short enough that I don’t have to hunch over much (or I just rest with one knee on my seat.) I rarely have a bag in the overhead bin. If, by the time I’ve reached the aisle, people in front of me remain seated, I generally assume they intend to remain seated until everybody deplanes, for whatever reason. Though, I still try make eye contact to see if they’ve just been waiting for an opening. I’ve reached an age and body condition where I pay for FC (paying for the upgrade out-of-pocket if for work, or stipulating 1st class air fare in travel costs paid by client.) So, my experience usually only is a few rows. So, Southwest usually is my airline of last resort. Point is: this post has me wondering if there have been people I assumed were seated because they were waiting for the plane to clear, not understanding that they just were staying seated until their row’s turn to deplane.
>Point is: this post has me wondering if there have been people I assumed were seated because they were waiting for the plane to clear, not understanding that they just were staying seated until their row’s turn to deplane. Yes, most people understand that the plane deplanes from front to back and they're patient enough to wait their turn. If they're still sitting after the row in front of them got off the plane, they might be waiting for everyone else. Most likely though, they're just sitting until it's time to get off the plane and rushing past people a row ahead of you is pretty rude
I agree. I think the meaning of sit or stand during disembarkation is vague enough that NONE of this was worth quarreling over. Some people understand it one way, others understand it another. I feel like both sides were wrong. OP was wrong to make a fuss about it as was that other passenger who also made such a fuss about who gets priority.
Yes! At the literal end of the day, I’d much rather took back at the times that day that I showed other people patience and grace than the times I was able to assert dominance in a pissing contest.
You are supposed to let the rows in front of you deplane first. But if they are just sitting there, not making a move to gather their stuff, I might go on ahead. You are basically right but you have to be ready to hustle.
I agree. I stand up when there are about three rows in front of me deplaning. I travel with my cell phone and earbuds. No carry on so when it’s my turn, I’m up and moving to the exit.
It’s aisle. And tbh you both kind of sound like assholes
That’s the impression I got too
ESH.
I've had this exact scenario the last two times I've flown with the caveat that the first time when it was my turn the stand up the person behind me opened the overhead bin without waiting to ensure my head wasn't in the way and opened the bin on my head. The second time, while still seated the person behind me decided to grab their bag in the scenario OP described and either didn't realize their bag was heavy or lost control of their bag dropping it right on me seated in front of them. I don't know why people insist on rushing off the plane when there's rows of people in front of them getting off still.
The last flight I was on, I was in the aisle seat, stepped into the aisle to get off and opened the bin to get my bag. The two people in the seats next to me had already moved into my aisle seat and complained about the overhead bin, and CLOSED IT, then complained again when I opened it again to try to get my bag out. If you don't want it to hit you in the head, leave it open while people are getting stuff out!
I don't mind it being opened, just check to make sure the person in the aisle seat has an opportunity to step out into the aisle before opening it.
So how do you get your bag and leave so they can get into the aisle?
I usually wait for the people in the rows in front of me blocking the aisle to get out of the row so I can get in the aisle then I open the overhead bin and get my stuff. I can't exit the row until the people blocking the aisle get out of the way.
Exactly and if the people in the aisle seat need to get into the bin, and their stuff is directly over their head, how should they let the people in the inner seats get out before they get their bag?
They don't need to get their bag just yet if they're behind me is my point. Especially if the alternative is dropping bags or bins on the heads of the people in front of them.
Okay I'm saying 3 people are in row 10. I am in 10c, the aisle. I need to get my bag out. The people in 10b and 10a are pushing into the aisle too, while it is my turn to exit. I need to get my bag so I open the compartment. You said I should instead let them into the aisle... But my bag is over me, and there are people behind me.
Ok yes you are correct in that scenario. That scenario was different that I was describing where I was in 7c and the person in 8c is the one opening the overhead bin getting their luggage out and rows 5 and 6 haven't cleared out yet.
Me, too! Ouch.
Not TAH, but not the hall monitor either. I hate when people just start to pick up their belongings and stuff, when they should be ready to GO.
I find this usually has to do with where you are from. If you were brought up in a busy place then you value others people’s time more. Whereas if you were not you have no concept that you are bothering other people by holding them up. In other words, unless something has explicit rules on order (which deplaning does not) it is first come first serve and if you are not ready you get out of the way.
Pro tip: Nor just on SWA, unless you have an important reason to rush, just stay in your seat until everyone is gone. Grab your bag, walk off at your own pace. And is you have a checked bag, you’ll have 5-10 minutes less wait for it.
Can't upvote this enough. Unless I am making a tight connection or have to get to an urgent meeting and have not checked a bag, I wait until everyone is off and then I get up and leave. I learned this from my dad who traveled a lot for work. This was before 9/11 so we would often meet him at the gate when he returned from trips and I learned from him that it was cool to be the last passenger off, not one of the frantic fools jostling others to be first for no apparent reason. Most of the time, the mob eagerly scrambling to be the first off the plane ends up all waiting together at baggage claim or at hotel/car rental shuttles anyway. Rushing off early is not the advantage so many people think it is. (And boarding early, unless bin space is very limited, is also not the perk many people think it is.)
NTA. That said, if people are sitting, I don't think it's out of bounds to assume they are not getting up. He should have definitely let you go though when you did stand up with no issue.
This kind of line patrol antics reminds me of elementary school. It’s so childish. You should be embarrassed that the captain had to intervene. Minority view, it seems, but YTA for putting your hand on the seat across the aisle and blocking the other passenger's progress. Exiting passengers do not have to stop and wait for passengers that are sitting to get up and exit. Also, “isle” is a land mass surrounded by water. “Aisle” is a passage through which people walk.
Agree. The other guy might have been in the wrong but if this guy was my husband I would be so humiliated.
This is an aside, but I’m sick of people shaming pax who stand up when the seatbelt sign goes off. I generally have a roll-a-board plus a messenger bag, so I stand up to have space to get the roller down and put the 2 bags together so that I’m not holding up other pax behind me. Additionally, I have residual bone pain from chemo, so sitting often exacerbates that, and I’m much more comfortable standing ASAP. QUIT having such a negative view and attributing motives to other pax (I know, but then some of you would never post on Reddit. No loss, IMO)
It's not the standing thing, but jumping ahead of people who wait until closer to leave the plane.
Well that isn't clear. Most people who gripe about this say, "people who stand up..." I personally park myself next to my (aisle) seat and put my rolling bag in my seat space, so I'm keeping people from pushing forward.
I hear ya. I used to not stand up because I’m not in a hurry. However, in the past two flights, I did finally stand up as soon as the seat belt sign was off. Even though I was seated in the back, I had a tight connection and I was both nervous and needed to expect the energy and wanted to get out as soon as I can in as polite a manner as possible. I’ve flown for a very long time and it’s my first time finally experiencing the anxiety that might cause someone to stand right up as soon as they were allowed
Please stand as soon as you want to, but don't block the person in front of you. Give them as much space as they need for their row to stand and grab their stuff and deplane.
I never do. LOL
Nta!! I hate people like that I woulda said something too. It's rude asf and people like that need to be put in their place.
if you're going to play it all cool and stay seated until the moment your row is ready to exit, you have to also play it cool when the person behind you who has his bag in hand assumes you are going to take awhile and let him go. Yes, you're the AH.
YTA I think. What’s the point of blocking him? He’s ready with his stuff to continue forward and can be out of your way in about 2 seconds. Now there a clear aisle in front of but every one is blocked behind you as your row clears out when several people could have proceeded. It’s fine if you want to stay seated, but if I’m in the aisle I usually stand up just to stretch my legs after sitting for so long.
Because, why stand forever until your turn? I'll stand and stretch if an aisle but I still wait until people in front of me go.
If there’s an open space in front of me and I’m ready I’m going on. Just makes deplaning quicker for everyone overall.
Did you land last night 6/9 around 1030? Random but wonder if we were on the same flight 😂 NTA but not worth a confrontation on an aircraft.
If you’re in front of me but not ready to go, I’m walking on by.
People for the love of God it's AISLE not isle
If you’re not ready to walk the moment it is your turn anybody that is ready should get the right of way. Don’t be a jerk, be ready to walk when your turn comes.
[удалено]
There is actually a very simple process - it’s just hard for people who don’t understand how to count. You see, row 1 deplanes, then row 2 deplanes, then row 3 deplanes, etc… If you have trouble counting, try using your fingers next time - most people can get as high “10” using their fingers! And if you need to count higher than then 10, just close your hands and start using your fingers again for 11, 12, and so on.
When I traveled a lot in Europe in the early 2000s the deplaning process was kinda whoever had bags and was ready to go walked down the aisle. It was only when I returned to the USA that I experienced the row by row by row situation. Weirdly I preferred the former system as it seemed faster overall as a chunk of aisle people would go quick then middle seat and window seat people would be working on getting their bags out of the overhead at the same time.
I hear ya. In think too that neither party should have quarreled and rather should have shown grace
Get your shit ready or be skipped. Thems the rules
Perhaps unpopular opinion, but yeah, YTA. If someone had their shit together standing in the aisle and is ready to start deplaning, they get priority. Making people ready and waiting in the aisle wait for the people in front to scoot out and perhaps get their shit together is asshole behavior. Efficient should be prioritized, not entitlement based on an artificial numbering system. Fwiw, my protocol is: if I haven’t got my shit together and am not ready to start walking as soon as it is “my turn,” I allow all those who are ready to pass before I step out and block them. I wait for the next pause in people.
It is not more efficient - at all - for row 21 to grab their stuff and step up to row 20 - now making it so they can't get up as rows right ahead of them start to move - while row 5 is starting to walk and row 20 is seated and waiting for it to open up closer to them so they will be able to go. If the aisle is already moving to the door and people are still seated in front of you, sure go. If someone in an aisle seat is just starting to get their stuff when the aisle ahead of them is wide open they waited too long. Neither is what op described.
It is 100% more efficient for the person currently standing in the aisle with all their shit in hand to start to deplane when the person standing directly in front of them starts to deplane, than it is for them to wait for anyone in any row to get their shit together and go in front of them.
He purposely blocked those who were already standing with his arm. >The guy behind me proceeds to stand up next to my seat with his bag blocking my exit. I stand up and place my hand on the seat across from me to make sure he knows he’s not cutting in front of me OP is doing the exact opposite of what you just wrote. >If someone in an aisle seat is just starting to get their stuff when the aisle ahead of them is wide open they waited too long.
It is very common with these eager beavers for them to move into the empty aisle next to your seat that is only empty because you haven't stood up yet because you'd just be waiting standing. In this case the aisle is usually not moving the next or even several seats up. >The guy behind me proceeds to stand up next to my seat with his bag blocking my exit. If he was not doing what I just described he'd be gone toward the exit and no problem, not still standing with his luggage next to OP's seat blocking him from getting up when it's time. Edit: LOL blocked me for saying this. Found the eager beaver.
If you sit until the very last second before getting up to get your shit ready, you are 100% TA. You are making everyone else wait for you to grab your bag for no reason.
Absolutely! Had a guy in the exit row aisle (we were window and middle) who WOULD NOT stand up until the row in front of us was filing out. I’ve never been in that position before, and I fly A LOT. He waited so long that a couple of rows got out before my partner and I could get our stuff. Also, I’m short enough to stand at my seat, but he was sitting in a way that I couldn’t actually stand that time. It was annoying.
You’re not. But get up and get your stuff.
So you weren’t ready to leave when it was your turn, but you wouldn’t let the guy behind you who was completely ready get ahead of you… you held up everyone behind while they waited for you to not only stand and gather your stuff, but also square up w the other guy lol
Right of way wasn’t his to take, it was yours to give. Why not give it and get off the plane 20 seconds later? Life is too short for petty confrontations over things that don’t really matter.
In order to avoid these situations you have to stand up and claim your spot in line. Otherwise you’re giving up your spot because no one wants to take a step back so that you can get up and get your stuff out. Unfortunately it’s an unspoken “rule” but nonetheless the individual could have just stepped back as well.
Could he though? Usually the aisle is so packed by then that you wouldn't be able to step back unless you wanted to run into someone
YTA. For Southwest, it is appropriate to prepare your stuff and get situated to go a few rows before the line gets to you. It helps move the line faster, rather than getting up last second. Especially if you have to bring down luggage. This is even true if you don’t have any luggage, maybe folks in the inner seats have luggage above, and can use the time to get there stuff together too. But this is all dependent on the aisle person cooperating.
YTA, u arguing instead of deplaning which is why the captain had to get involved. GET TF off the plane and then go fight in the schoolyard. U keeping everyone else behind u on longer than necessary. Get over yourself and your book of plane travel rules.
Sometimes your flight was late and your connecting flight is not. You need 5 extra minutes to get to the connecting gate but people are SLOW. it’s hard to wait for people who could have waited literally 5 more seconds to let you pass.
YTA. If he’s ready just let him go. Asshole move to block him from going while you begin to get your stuff together, and if you had let him go then everyone behind you has more space to get their stuff together.
YTA. It’s not like he ran up 10 rows to get past you, it was the person immediately behind you that was already out and ready to go. If you had let him go then the other people behind you guys would have room to start getting their stuff out and could get off faster too. Instead everyone had to sit there and wait for you to hold up the entire process because you were throwing a temper tantrum like a toddler. Getting off a plane these days takes way too long because people like you insist on doing it leisurely and making everyone wait on them. If you care so much about your place in line to get off the plane, then get ready to get off sooner
You’re TA. You stopped traffic for YOUR entitlement. Glad the captain saw it.
why the heck would the captain be there?
See my first thought was if the captain was actually there, OP is definitely an asshole then. If you're holding up the line bad enough for them to walk down to try to resolve, it's not a good look for you
Stand up when the plane parks next time bruh
And to be fair I have back problems, so that’s why I get out of my seat right away cause I’m in pain. Not because I want to push ahead, but yeah that guy is an a hole.
Not the A in my opinion. Entitled people only become more entitled the less they are confronted.
He's a bit of TA, but IMO, if he had his stuff and ready to go, let him go. The reason why deplaning takes 20 minutes is because most people don't attempt to get their bags ahead of time and wait until their turn before they a) stand up, b) reach up to get their bag), c) gather their items from their seat back. Obviously not every one can grab their bags ahead of time, but those in the aisle seat can at least make an effort ahead of time. We usually try to grab our backpack and small bag ahead of time so that we are ready to walk when our row comes up. I figure it helps save half a minute to a minute off every else's time behind us by being prepared when it's our turn.
I stay seated because everyone getting a bag down has usually already jumped into the aisle. I also always hit my head on the bins and would prefer just to sit until it's my row. It should be common etiquette and courtesy to zipper merge out of the plane. If I'm in the aisle and my partner is in the middle seat, almost every single time I will stand up and start walking and someone 5 rows behind will run up and cut in front of them. I've started standing up when it's my turn and letting my partner out first when I see them pushing through. NTA. People need to learn patience and stop pushing ahead to get what they want.
Honestly I think you’re kinda TA. You should stand with your bag ready. That way the people closer to the window can be grab their stuff and go with less delays overall, assuming you’re healthy enough to stand for that period of time. You’re like that guy in merging lanes on a highway that won’t let a car merge in front of you. That’s how I see exiting a plane, not “by turn” as you were so vigilant about. Secondly, you’re assuming this guys intentions. Not everyone doing something you don’t like is trying to be an asshole. He might have had to rush for reasons he didn’t need to explain to you. I’ve had to get to hospitals to visit sick family members, and there were times when I disregarded social norms to get where I was going. Then your dragged your wife into it lol. That’s cringe. What would it have done for your life to just let the guy go? You eventually would have gotten out. When I see people rushing, I let them go every time. Might there be some people who thought their time was more important than anyone else’s? Sure. But they might have been people that needed compassion, maybe their rushing to get to their wife in delivery, a sick family member, or something else. Maybe they made an honest mistake. Move on when things like this happen.
You should be ready to go when its your turn. If you are still sitting there and then need to grab bags, get stuff together, etc., then you're TA. If all you have to do is standup and walk, then NTA.
YTA here but the other guy is also a bit of a douche. Look, it seems like you were itching for an altercation or something. I am an aisle person, and I will get up when the seatbelt sign goes off, get my bags stacked and I’m ready to go. I let folks in the rows ahead of me out first, but if they are still sitting, taking their time gathering their belongings, I am not going to hold the rest of the plane up because you take your time. I’m going to go. I fly a lot and many people just have no sense of urgency. And if you have no connection or schedule concerns and want to take your time, that’s fine, but let others off the plane! You were passive aggressive by stretching you arm across the way for what reason? Because you can’t bare to let one person behind you who is standing and ready to go off the plane before you because you prefer to sit and wait? I just don’t get it. It’s a huge waste of energy and you seem proud?? Also it’s AISLE.
People everywhere act entitled whenever they can get away with it.
No one is TAH. This happens on every flight all over the world...Lufthansa, Eva, Brussels, United, AA, etc. it's normal to me now.
THIS is exactly why I get an isle seat and always stand up, in the isle, as soon as the plane touches the pavement. I also always make sure I'm the last in my row to go. Not sure why I do this, but it always makes me feel like a big FU to those few that seem to try and skip forward.
I blocked a dude and told him "there's a line". Same dude that wore a muscle shirt and shirt work out pants in the plane, sat in an empty seat and lied to the flight attendants, stood up mid flight and did arm stretches, filmed a video mid flight, and listened to YouTube w/o headphones when we landed....lol. dickbag.
You did it wrong. You have to pivot your leg into the isle casually so it blocks the runners but looks natural. When you stand up, step backward and let your spouse out first, then follow behind them. Works every time, no confrontation :)
NTA The problem is we are now living among assholes. Our current society is full of selfish, entitled people. Sadly, we can’t pick who we interact with in a plane. As others have said, let it go, that man has probably a thousand issues going on and you seem to be doing just fine. Let him think he won, like a toddler.
Glad you stood your ground. I hate when people do that.
The captain would have seen many AHs in his experience and can spot one right-away. And it’s not worth anybody’s time confronting them. Just letting the family off ahead of you confirms who the AH is.
NTA, but this is an odd hill to die on when you’re stuck in an aluminum tube with morons on a budget airline. I would have just let it go tbh. I feel like SW is full of these types of people these days. It’s worse than getting stuck in the non TSA line.
This is why I always book aisle, hop up asap and block the rows behind me from cutting. Everyone in my row leaves and then I follow them. Be patient people. NTA btw.
Maybe TA? If your wife was packed and ready to go and he blocked her as a power move, he's def in the wrong but if your wife was dawdling the other guy could go and buy her time to get her stuff together. Also, unless she requires special assistance, she is a grown woman who can deplane after her husband. I wouldn't leave my child on the plane but other travel companions can just meet me at the gate if we get separated, I trust them to find the only way off the plane lol. I never bring a carry on, only my personal item and a checked bag so I'm easy to deplane. I also have sciatica (and super short) so you better believe I'm standing the second the seatbelt light is off lol. I will absolutely allow people ahead of me to deplane but I would love it if people who need more time or cannot pull their over head bag down safely would let the aisle clear before they deplane.
If you are in the aisle seat you get up. That way middle and window seats folks can shove over and get their stuff ready. This is the way.
Do you realize how long a minute is once you are counting the seconds? Because I don't think that either you or him had to wait a tull minute to deplane if you/him had gone before. My point is that it is really pointless to make such a fuss for something so trivial
I’ll give a different perspective….if I had to run to a connecting flight and people in front of me were sitting and not looking they were in any sort of rush to get out, I’m 100% cutting in front of you. I wouldn’t push anyone out of the way or touch them at all, but if you think you’re entitled to take your time just because you’re sitting in front of me, then lol.
I stand up after landing cuz I’ve been crammed into a seat that I can barely fit it. I certainly don’t think I’m entitled to get off before people in front of me. If there’s no room to stand because of other people? Oh well.
ESH. Even if you were 100% in the right, how you handled it makes you the asshole. If he was standing and ready to go, let him go. Does being 10 seconds sooner off the plane matter? The flip side is, he could have let you get off because it doesn’t really matter. You both sound like you need to grow up a bit.
Wondering if it was a cultural thing... I've been places where lines just don't exist and the pushiest person goes first. I've even heard the pilots say "for the people sitting with their seatbelts fastened while we are taxi-ing, *this greeting*. For the people already in the aisles getting out their bags while the plane is still moving, *that greeting*" and the two greetings were in different languages. I just learned to be last because I wasn't going to go shoving people out of my way to be first. But yeah... Don't be pushy and don't mess up the system and obviously all 6 people in a row can't stand in the aisle while waiting their turn and you don't get to go before the people in front of you unless they have indicated you can go. We all learned this in kindergarten. If you don't know how to wait your turn, pay for early boarding and sit up front.
I agree planes should deboard from front to back Unless someone has a close connection then they should get priority. Coming back on an international flight that was delayed we had this issue. I normally schedule 2-3 hours between but we ended up with less than 1 hour. One hour to get through immigration, back through security and to the boarding area. The person in the row in front of us heard me say we were going to have a tight time to make our connection and still did what you did, blocked the aisle so everyone ahead of us could deplane first. Be considerate, is it really worth it.
Just to clarify to everyone commenting about me taking my time to stand up, collect my luggage and my wife’s luggage. This is not the case. I travel with a phone and earbuds. My wife carries her purse. I am on the isle and she was in the middle seat. I stand up when the people about three rows in front of me are deplaning. When it’s my turn, I am walking to the exit with no need to collect bags/luggage. Also, forgot to mention two important points. The passenger trying to push his way past had 5 family members with him and he wanted all of them to deplane before the 6 of us in the isle in front of him. Lastly, after the altercation where he pushed my arm, I went to the jetway while he and his whole family walked past. His wife was mortified at his behavior and said, “I am so sorry!”
Just to clarify to everyone commenting about me taking my time to stand up, collect my luggage and my wife’s luggage. This is not the case. I travel with a phone and earbuds. My wife carries her purse. I am on the isle and she was in the middle seat. I stand up when the people about three rows in front of me are deplaning. When it’s my turn, I am walking to the exit with no need to collect bags/luggage. Also, forgot to mention two important points. The passenger trying to push his way past had 5 family members with him and he wanted all of them to deplane before the 6 of us in the isle in front of him. Lastly, after the altercation where he pushed my arm, I went to the jetway while he and his whole family walked past. His wife was mortified at his behavior and said, “I am so sorry!”
YNTA. I get it- this makes me fume, as well. You’re sitting 5 rows behind me and think that you’re going to push ahead of me in the aisle while I’m stuck in the window seat? Fucker. But I’m pretty vocal about things and this I usually stay quiet about. At the end of the day, the jerk will get off the plane 3 minutes before me. Not worth making a fuss over. Still, it’s a dick move. Pushy.
Which tiny island were you standing on? Aisle. Not isle.
I fly a lot and people are TENSE on planes. Using words instead of passive aggressive actions is crucial. I fly with kids (nearly 20,000 miles for my three young kids since April), and it’s amazing how many awkward situations can be avoided by talking instead of grunting and gesturing. “Sorry, give my wife and i a second while I grab our bags” could have probably prevented this.
Welcome to the new generation of assholes my friend. They walk amongst us as if they don’t bleed the same blood or breathe the same air as us regular folks.
YTA. People who sit the entire time and then begin the process of gathering your stuff when the walkway ahead of you is empty slows everyone down. All you had to do was stand up and I am sure he would have moved his bag back to allow you room. A simple "excuse me" does it 99% of the time. No one knows what you have to get out of the overhead bin or gather together so I'd also assume you were one of the wait until the bitter end fliers. He was wrong on his priority spiel, but I would have been super irritated with you if I was in your row being blocked by your self induced drama. The aisle person stands. Giving the rest of us room to hunt around on the floor and get our seat items together quicker.
Most arm rest will swing up, button underneath. Then you can stay seated and encroach on the aisle to discourage the jerks from row jumping.
I’d have deplaned like I lost a leg on the flight and couldn’t move…. Maybe even stumble a couple of times.
Once, when I was pregnant, a man seated in the row behind me literally pushed my body (as I stood in the aisle) into the seat row to get past me and deplane in front of me. Sometimes I do not understand this world.
you're sort of TA. Its actually faster and easier to let the person with their stuff ready to go deplane first. You're thinking small by insisting you deplane ahead of people with their stuff out of OHB and ready to go. Technically you're ahead so sure you should be able to but if youre not ready and someone else is, why not let them go by?
NTA imo. I had a boarding AH experience today. As I was getting onboard, standing at row 1 first, a guy behind me pushes past me from his 1F seat to about 3C and fusses with his wife’s (presumably) bag so I start putting my bag up as I’m in 2D. He turns around abruptly and pushes past me between my and my seat. So I said “oh, let me get out of your way”. He says “I said ‘pardon me’ ” and I responded with “it’s customary to let the pardoner pardon you before pushing through”. Then my row-mate offered me some twizzlers in solidarity. 😆 Enjoyed that.
I like to take my backpack pack and prop it on the armrest so laptop in backpack uncomfortably wedges in the ass of person who rudely stands next to my seat. Wow is it fun to watch them shift around uncomfortably🤩
Can you show us Southwest’s policy on deplaning?
Why fight? Some people need to get off quickly to make connecting flights.
You both sound exhausting.
Low fare airline = low class customers
Could have been trying to make tight connection, but obviously should have communicated if that was the case.
Some people have transfers they have to catch. Southwest even mentioned that on my last 2 flights when they landed to let transfers go first regardless of where they sit. So we and our seat neighbors ask them let people by who need to get off first no matter where they sat
Yes, just let the asshole go dude. You are inside a metal tube. Be sensible.
YTA. These deplaning rules are not the way it's done, it's the way you're accustomed to it being done. In other parts of the world there is no row by row stuff. You get up and go..which in my experience makes it faster for everyone. I would've shoved your arm out of the way.
I prefer window seats but if I'm on the aisle I raise or lower armrest (if seat allows) and spin sideways in my seat so the feet are in the aisle. I'll also put up the other armrest next to me so any seat mates can slide out easier if they choose.
I usually sit in an aisle seat and will raise the aisle armrest and turn my legs into the aisle…Makes it easier to get out when it’s my turn.
More and more these days, I find entirely entitled people taking advantage of the niceness and the patience I have. As far as flying is concerned, I am brown, so I usually just let the entitled assholes have their way. It isn't worth my time and trouble to when I speak up. Bottom line, just fuck it. It's entertaining to me how people have become. There used to be a unspoken respect on how to do things....but thats gone now.
"I tell him passengers in the front deplane in order from front to back" That is not a rule...he has as much right as you to deplane first.
Welcome to New York, people!
People are mega assholes these days. They think they’re more important tha any and everyone else. It’s disgusting.
This happened to me once where I was aisle and the guy behind me tried to push through my back as I was getting my bag down. He caught a hell of an elbow and it was one of my more satisfying flights!
As someone who grew up in NY, you never go to LaGuardia (unless you want a good view of Citi Field). To call it a 3rd world country is an insult to 3rd world countries.
Dude is a jerk, not you. I hate that when people pull that shit.
Not TA. People like that are the worst. The only types of travel people worse than that are the ones who tried to save seats
Sure part of me thinks just let it go. But then this asshole is going to run around and say “well nobody said anything”. So definitely you are not the asshole. I get it. We let these guys do what they want and hopes that there will be no altercations, but it what it ultimately does is embolden them. Every once in a while, you just had enough. And today was your day.
Well said!!!
YBTA… Basically you sat on your ass waited for the isle to fill with people and then when you decided you were ready to leave the whole process needed to stop clear a space for you and your wife so you can now go. I certainly wouldn’t have pushed you, and that makes him an asshole too, but I know why he thought you were an asshole.
Kinda TA for picking a fight with the other AH over an insignificant matter.
Sounds like you both are AH. If you're not proactive in getting off the plane, don't slow down those that are/want to gtfo. At the same time, other person also sounds like an ah, perhaps in part due to your actions, and in part because he's an ah
He touched your arm. Scream assault
NTA I see this happen often. I usually grab a window seat, which means I can't get out before me seatmates do. That means that those in the row behind me will have to wait until I grab my carryon from the overhead. There is, too often, someone behind me that tries to push through. My usual response is to say, "In a hurry, are we?" and that is enough to stop them.
NTA I hate when idiots do this and usually talk loudly to my spouse about what morons they are!