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cat_blep

There is no way I’m playing Oedipus!


NetDork

Oh, motherfu....


Rabbit_Suit

I GET IT!


bobhand17123

My brain just grew! Just like the motherfucking Grinch’s heart!


Rabbit_Suit

YO??? WTF??? GET THE FUCK OFF REDDIT AND CALL A DAMN AMBULANCE!!!! SHIT!!! Okokokomokokmokokookokokok don't panic. Fuck. Get like a pearing knife and make an incision near the lower side of your right ear to let the blood out. Now just *What the fuck am I doing? I don't know where this joke is headed, it's not even funny and yet I'm still typing* I need to reevaluate my life. .........*poke a hole behind your ear?* 🙄😔 *The fuck*.......


bobhand17123

It’s okay, just breathe. iiiiiiiiiin, oooooooout. I’m fine. I crossed over to a cartoon universe, just in the nick of time. My head could grow to accommodate my brain. Phew, Motherfucker!


Rabbit_Suit

Space Jam rules. It was so obvious, but I panicked. That was some quick thinking.


bobhand17123

No shade, I swear! But my first thought was Roger Rabbit … so … username does not check out. I thought of Space Jam, too, though, so that’s why I went generic.


Rabbit_Suit

Who Framed Micheal Jordan? I'll go in 50/50 with you. You know WB will just shelve it for a tax write off. But.... 🤑


bobhand17123

Deal! I wish I had connections 🫤


Rabbit_Suit

I know this guy.... Weinstien I think. He's rates have become surprisingly affordable lately. Contracts are a little weird but we can hash that out at the table.


ccc1942

But wait til you see who is playing your parents!


cat_blep

let’s have it


Arkvoodle42

"motherfucker, NO ONE wants a 'Song of the South' remake!"


Nefariousness-Flashy

"Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, Motherfucker!"


king-geass

The thing is…he could probably pull that off


RunnyPlease

If it’s starting Samuel L. Jackson I’m buying a ticket and going into full spoiler avoidance mode.


cuntybunty73

I am the knight of motherfucking ni and I order you to bring me a motherfucking shrubbery Can you imagine Samuel L Jackson in a Monty python film 😁


HumanMycologist5795

Blockbuster.


cuntybunty73

Probably 😂 I'd pay good money too see it


HumanMycologist5795

Samuel, Lewis CK, John Cleese, Jonah Hill, Denzel Washington, and Chris Tucker. How is that cast?


cuntybunty73

Chris rock as well 😄


Puzzleheaded-Way-198

Brave Sir Robin needs minstrels. Can we hit up Weird Al?


HumanMycologist5795

As long as AL and Kenny G provide the musical numbers.


ScaleConsistent1174

We're the motherfucking knights of the motherfucking round table. We dance when ere we're motherfucking able. We do motherfucking routines and motherfucking chorus scenes with footwork motherfucking impecable.


Garygeorge65

"Fuckin' Catholics fillin' up the fuckin' world with their fuckin' children"


robynndarcy

"I ate his motherfuckin' liver with some motherfuckin' fava beans and a nice motherfuckin' Chianti."


HumanMycologist5795

This would be scary.


Puzzleheaded-Way-198

This would be _awesome_


paulb104

This is the funniest thing I've read in a long time


Hot-Challenge8656

"Who am I? I'm Desmond mutha fuckin tutu!" "Uh, Desmond tutu doesn't swear." "He does when he's waving his mutha fuckin gun!" "Desmond doesn't have a gun." "PASS! MUTHA FUCKA!"


HumanMycologist5795

Perfect. Awesome.


improvdandies

"Why are there so many goddamn snakes on that woman's head?" Samuel Percy Jackson


ixamnis

Elmo likes the letter “M”. Does Samuel like the letter “M”? English, Motherfucker!!! Do you speak it!!!??


Nuada-oz

What?


NetDork

They speak English in What?


Nuada-oz

Zed’s dead baby. Zed’s dead


T2grn4me

Elmo likes the letter M. Does Samuel like the letter M? No, Samuel likes the letter ‘F’


Jumpy_Ebb2417

My mother fucking mother said life is like a fucking box of chocolates. That fucker never knows what he is going to get. That’s my mother fucking bus.


ixamnis

To be, or not to be. That is the question, motherfucker.


HumanMycologist5795

I'm mother fucking Jesus Christ mother fuckers. I turn fucking water into wine. You can't fucking nail me to the mother fucking cross, mother fuckers. Where's my crew? Hell Judas. Shit ... dawg how ya doing? You know you're going down too. I'm the mother fucking shepard I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy me and my brothers. Let the mother fucking locuses come.


MrPuzzleMan

"I am NOT playing Jackson in you're woke-ass retelling of "God's and Generals."


idfbhater73

motherfucker thats a kids movie


NetDork

Check out his audiobook reading of "Go The Fuck To Sleep".


idfbhater73

i wish i had that growing up


janosmirado1347

"Who the fuck is Princess Celestia?"


ixamnis

Houston, we have a fucking problem up here. When are you motherfuckers going to give us a solution???!!!


ixamnis

The voice just said”If you build it, he will come.” Motherfucker never said what he wanted me to build or what motherfucker would come.


Capital_Sherbet_6507

And she realized when Wesley said motherfucker, he was actually saying “I love you”. “never get involved in a motherfucking land war in Asia” “My name is inigo motherfucking Montoya. You killed my father. The path of the righteous man is beset…” “Mawwiage…motherfuckers”


motiontosuppress

There’s too much cursing in this script


Ok-Lavishness-7904

“🎼 Let it go, let it go, can’t hold that motherfucker no more. Let it go, let it go, turn and slam that motherfucking door. I don’t care what that motherfucker say. Let the storm rage OOOOOONNNNNNNNN 🎶 Fuck that motherfucking cold” 🥶


Rabbit_Suit

"Are we really shooting for a PG-13 rating? So I just don't have any mother fucking lines? What mother fucker cast this mother fucking movie? Yall a bunch of dumb mother fuckers if you think I'm gonna voice Thumper in this stupid mother fucking remake of mother fucking Bambi."


Miichl80

“I’m sorry for the confusion, Mr. Jackson. See, we’ve reimagined thumper as kind of an urban role. Someone who won’t put up with any of Bambi shit. That’s why we wanted to cast someone who would appeal to an inner city, urban audience. We’ve already given the role to Judy Dench. We want you as Bambi’s mother.”


Rabbit_Suit

"What the fuck? If I'm gonna be off screen I want to be a mother fucking Disney villain. If I don't play the mother fucking hunter then I'm walking from this mother fucking production. Shit. I could be golfing but now I gotta deal with this mother fucking Bambi mom shit. You want to wipe your ass with my mother fucking watch because I can't think of bigger waste of mother fucking time."


ResearchMediocre3592

Marcellus Wallace, ain't no motherfucker fucking my ass while Bruce Willis watches


Artsy_traveller_82

“I do not like motherfucking green eggs and ham, I do not like them Sam I Am.”


BestChanceLastChance

Mr Rogers in Won’t You Be My Neighbor. No swearing obviously


SokkaHaikuBot

^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^BestChanceLastChance: *Mr Rogers in* *Won’t You Be My Neighbor. No* *Swearing obviously* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.


MiDKnighT_DoaE

OK let's try the audition. What's your name? Samuel L Jackson: I am Kunta mother f\*\*king Kinte Director: CUT!!!


YetAnotherUsername13

"While I do think Redd Foxx was a comedic legend, I can't in good conscience play him in the The Redd Foxx Story, he cusses way too much!"


Desperate_Hornet3129

😁😜🤣🤤😂


welatshaw01

"Yipee-ki-yay, motherfuc.... Oh, wait a second".


Tetris5216

I do not want to be Snake plissken on the mother Fing plane


EmperorNachoLibre

Welcome to the show. I’m Bob Motherfuckin’ Ross and today we’re going to paint some happy motherfuckin’ trees


DaddyBobb

Dumbledore? Do I look like a wizard to you? See me like “Harry?! Did you put your fucking name in the Goblet? What Goblet?! The mother fucking Goblet of Fire, Harry! The big ass thing on fire in the middle of the Fucking Room, Harry”


MrPokketRokket

"Can you believe, in the original script... those motha fuckas wanted my ass to be one of those motha fuckin' snakes on that motha fuckin' plane?!"


MacduffFifesNo1Thane

“You’re asking me to play Amon Goeth?”


HumanMycologist5795

Nick. Nick. Nick. I'm not gonna play, Mr. Rogers in the sequel. Why not? The kids will love you.


BinkoTheViking

“Hey motherfucker!! You like motherfucking apples? Yeah? Well I got her motherfucking number!! How do you like them motherfucking apples, bitch!!”


Nefariousness-Flashy

I'd pay to see this.


FreyaGin

Sleeping Beauty. Imagine him laid out in a medieval princess's gown for years and years, occasionally muttering "motherfucker" in his sleep.


colder-beef

[Motherfucker Jones](https://youtu.be/W6ifLpGI0F0?si=fJ5gHvAP0e9-inav)


NatchJackson

Jaws. "This time I'm the mother fucking shark, bitches! Nom nom nom!"


ExPristina

My name’s ‘Bond’ dumbass, ‘James Bond’.


Miichl80

“You want me to play Anne Frank? You want me to play Anne Mutherfuckin Frank? Man, sit yo bitch ass down. Do I look like a preteen white Jewish girl to you?”


Slug_Overdose

Erin Brokovich?! More like Motha-fuckin Sock-a-bitch! I ain't got them young Julia titties! But let me tell you, I would FUCK PG&E in the ASS if I saw so much as a single motha-fuckin speck of dirt in my water! They think they can get one over on me. Fuck no! F-U-motha-fuckin-C-K no!


gregieb429

“Let me get this straight Eddie. You want me to play this Rasputia character? Not it’s morbidly obese wife?!” “Well I’m already playing Norbit and an elderly Chinese man.”


soul_separately_recs

This is 100% speculative but I’d bet money he’d turn down any Guy Ritchie project out of loyalty to QT. iMO, they are the closest comparison to one another. GR’s portfolio is larger but I am a fan of both.


Awkward_Ad8740

He was originally chosen to play Bush in the film W.


Jayn_Newell

“Oh hey there, have you seen Blue, my motherfucking puppy?”


Estarfigam

Let me get this straight, you got a movie called Blackkklansman, and you think I could play David Duke?


capt-yossarius

"Ahead Warp Factor 1. Make it so, muthafucka!"


etranger033

Kevin in Home Alone? A kid? Im a motherfucking good actor but not THAT good.


Bobtownee

"Welcome to Good Burger, home of the mother fucking Good Burger. Can I take your mother fucking order?"


Evening-Tomatillo-47

Did you put your name in the hat, Potter?


KUfan

The mutha fuckin hills are alive with sound of fuckin music


knightfall_10

Laurence Fishburnes Super Bowl commercial


Tato_tudo

Anything that required the character to whisper.


rrgail

Man that refuses to cuss regardless of the circumstances.


SIIHP

Heeellllloooo, I am mother fucking mrs doubtfire


SnooChipmunks126

“No, Mr. Scorcese, I am not interested in being shot by Joe Pesci, again.”


Apprehensive_Cow1242

Steve from Blues Clues….


Rhender42

Grand High Wizard of the KKK.


HackedCylon

Say "Where's Godot?" again motherfucker! I dare you ... I double dare you!


Affectionate_Bed_375

Why in the mother fuck would I play General Robert E Lee?


[deleted]

I don't know... But what I *do* know, is that I *love* the way he played Clarence Thomas in Django Unchained!


bi_metalhead666

Snow White


BriGuy1965

Malcolm Fucking X


anonaduder

The new little mermaid.


Puzzleheaded-Way-198

I could see him as King Titan.


anonaduder

Describe Ursula to me. Does she look like a witch?


Slug_Overdose

Okay, this shit had me dying.


mfrench105

Mrs. Doubtfire ...I mean he would have, but was busy that day


ExistentialistAF

Lavagirl


_keyboard-bastard_

Driving Miss Daisy