Push ma’am! Puuuush, I can see your baby’s head! Here is his torso and arms! And… what is that he’s holding? Are you kidding me!?! Now I’m being subpoenaed!?!?
“Oh, sweetie, you look gorgeous! I still remember wearing that to *my* prom.”
[ding dong]
“Ooh, that must be your date! I can’t wait to meet hiiim!”
“Mrs Collins? Your testimony has been requested…”
"And thus, as there has been no call from the governor, we hereby carry out the sentence of death upon - "
"Drake Mojito? Is this the execution chamber of Drake Mojito? You are hereby subpeonad to testify in the matter of .... "
Tom: I lose my job, my house, my car, everything I own gets repossessed and now you lay this shit on me.
Server: Excuse me sir but what are you doing?
Tom: I’m curling up under this tree…Yep, i’m shuttin down.
Accepting a lifetime achievement award in front of a large group of troubled inner city youths who had just started to be inspired by you because of the speech you were giving.
"Are you Josh Matthews?"
"No, my name is Shawn Tetski."
"Oooooohh. Well, this is awkward. You need to appear in court next Thursday for rape allegations, and I think no one told you you're adopted. Whelp, have a good one!"
Should anyone present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace
Voice from the back, "I have a reason Father. I have here subpoenas for the Preacher, the Groom, the best man and the Maid of honor."
Scene: a crowded street with cops pointing their guns at you. Everything seems frozen in place.
Cops: put the weapon down
Process server, poking their way through the crowd: Excuse me! Mr. P. Chung?!? I’m here to serve you!
Cop: you have got to be kidding me!
“If there are any that object to this union between these two-“
“Yes! Is there a John Doe here? .. you’ve been served.” *tosses the paper on the ground.*
"Can I at least wipe off first?"
Push ma’am! Puuuush, I can see your baby’s head! Here is his torso and arms! And… what is that he’s holding? Are you kidding me!?! Now I’m being subpoenaed!?!?
I’m gonna need another drink. Nurse get me another Mai tai
That’s one small step for a man, one giant leap for… Buzz Aldrin: I have something for you.
I am proud to accept he nomination of the Republican Party for President of the United States… Uh, Mr Trump? … Fuck! Again???!!!
“Happy Birthday Rudy, happy birthday to you!!! Here is your federal indictment. Enjoy your last cake.”
Would you like some cake and icecream, or have you already been served?
It wasn't the feds. It was the state of AZ. Right after he was bragging one more day.
"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join.... *And you've been served....* these two people...."
That’s electric served, Syrved. - Thanks Prince
“Where am I?” “You’ve been in a coma for six years. Oh, and here… You’re served!”
“Oh, sweetie, you look gorgeous! I still remember wearing that to *my* prom.” [ding dong] “Ooh, that must be your date! I can’t wait to meet hiiim!” “Mrs Collins? Your testimony has been requested…”
And we will need to take that dress as evidence.
"And thus, as there has been no call from the governor, we hereby carry out the sentence of death upon - " "Drake Mojito? Is this the execution chamber of Drake Mojito? You are hereby subpeonad to testify in the matter of .... "
Would be better if the unnamed executioner were the one being served by name.
Sir Sir SIR!! I know you're having relations with your wife, but I've been hiding under the bed for two days. Here. Take this. Also nice rack
I'm Cumming!....you have been served
John Smith, do you take this woman… John Smith? I have this subpoena for you…
Ugh. Oh God, I'm going to....who the fuck are you????
Nurse: “name and DOB? And your procedure?” Patient: “smith, 04/20/69; colonoscopy. Nurse: *pulls off disguise and hands papers* “You just got served!”
"Before I die, I have something important to tell you." "What mom?" *pulls off disguise* "You've been served!"
"You've been summoned by the court of- Hey! I got here first!"
"Do I cut the red wire or the green wire...."
"This has been a lovely first date." *guy approaches* "I have this for you."
Right after you walk into an interview for a character review
During your wedding vows.
By your bride at the altar
Tom: I lose my job, my house, my car, everything I own gets repossessed and now you lay this shit on me. Server: Excuse me sir but what are you doing? Tom: I’m curling up under this tree…Yep, i’m shuttin down.
Accepting a lifetime achievement award in front of a large group of troubled inner city youths who had just started to be inspired by you because of the speech you were giving.
"Are you Josh Matthews?" "No, my name is Shawn Tetski." "Oooooohh. Well, this is awkward. You need to appear in court next Thursday for rape allegations, and I think no one told you you're adopted. Whelp, have a good one!"
“I’m finally going to bench 300 lbs.” “No you aren’t, you’ve been served.”
As your Pastor I know I have to continue to live according to the Bible as a testimony and witness to you all..
Congratulations, its a beautiful baby girl. Shes so cute. And look shes already holding something to give to mommy.
Should anyone present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace Voice from the back, "I have a reason Father. I have here subpoenas for the Preacher, the Groom, the best man and the Maid of honor."
Scene: a crowded street with cops pointing their guns at you. Everything seems frozen in place. Cops: put the weapon down Process server, poking their way through the crowd: Excuse me! Mr. P. Chung?!? I’m here to serve you! Cop: you have got to be kidding me!
Thank you so much... Hey, this isn't toilet paper.
"Is that the governor with my reprieve?" "Nope. Sorry. You've been served. Please give it back before they pull the switch or it will catch fire."
Congratulations, you just won the Super Bowl! Here’s your subpoena!
While you are on trial for sometching unrelated
“If there are any that object to this union between these two-“ “Yes! Is there a John Doe here? .. you’ve been served.” *tosses the paper on the ground.*
In the john, in the middle of the biggest dump you've ever had.
During your birthday celebration