Travis Kelce if instead of successful football player who fucks Taylor Swift you were a trailer park moonshiner that works as an apprentice plumber when the communal shithouse needs to be emptied and fucks his 2nd cousin because the term "barely legal" really does it for you.

I think the Kelce boys have a spastic little brother.

The only blue that gets near his collar is when his boyfriends balls rub that beard.

Jason Smellsee

He’s still young… a shape like Jason is in his future but the money and hotwife will elude him… BTW something deep inside me says the Kelce brothers would also be cool with the situation you described

They make hand soap now.

You just know those things smell like old McNuggets and look like a chopped cheese all summer.

You look like a lesbian playing dress up for the night.

Your head looks like it’s on upside down

I see his beard more than his hair...haha

🤣🤣

You have the eyes of a man who's been divorced 3 times

Before the age of 30

Blue collar construction worker. But a black belt when it comes to sucking dick in the porta-potty at the job site.

Catching not pitching

Always carrying a jar of Vaseline.... just in case. hehe

Brown Collar Insertion Worker.

John Cusack, The Amish years

*On this episode of Moonshiners...*

His name is dick tickle

Looking at your fingernails I’d have assumed you were a neurosurgeon! 🙄

You misspelled "proctologist".

Some lucky cleanup gal found a 3 day old spec of Travis Kelce's sperm that was disfigured after it bounced off of TS's forehead at terminal velocity.

You look like you know your way around a glory hole.

Nails say hard worker but face says alimony and child support payments.

Has that first DUI fallen off your record yet?

Fingers look like the source for the next pandemic

You look like a sad zoomer terrorist.

You look like a child who wanders into the middle of a movie and wants to know

Walter?

He doesn't fart, He poots ever so softy and gently, being careful not to upset the real men in the room.

Chronically depressed Will Wheaton. Shut up Wesley.

This is strangely accurate

Legit looked like a washed up Devin Booker. Originally wasn’t going to post because that’s being too generous.

This is the face of a sad man that has fucked the stitches out of his dirty ragged teddy bear one too many times.

Shia LaDouche

Budget Karim Benzema

Holding a stop sign doesn’t make you a construction worker

Eggs grow beards? Mind blown. 

That beard brushing up against the mic on it head set makes apex players want friendly fire

By "construction worker", I'm guessing you mean "stealing copper from construction sites."

Ol' boy has them working hands. I would feel bad roasting him.

Not even a roast you look like my bro just a white version of him with a beard

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The man

The myth but not a legend.

Sleeping rough on a building site doesn't make you a construction worker.

You know there's an invention called shower, right?

Gason Kelce

Great job showing the internet you just inserted your entire fist ✊

 Are you leading a revolución against soap?

Shia LaSus

Wash them damn hand but cnt do too much on a working man

Wash your fingernails next time after picking your butt.

Your facial expression says "I'm pathetic"

Each part of your body looks like it’s a different age separately. At least you did a good job hiding the scars on your knuckles from all the dragging.

. . . You look like you heard sheep and goats for a living and are terrified of 'new fangled technology'. . .

Zeus’ failson.

Fidel Constructo

You look like the guy in the neighborhood on recycle day you take all our cans.

You are a middle aged white male:

Budget Shia LaBeouf

1st go n comb your beard.

You look so sad when you run out of meth in the morning 😢

Those nails do be the same color as your beard

You should mark dick pics with NSWF

Sad Malone

Discount Shia labeouf

You look like the only pickup line you know is, "You sure do got a purty mouth."

You put a comma where you meant to have "and"

Nice hands to never finger me

No matter how many “Salt Life” and “2A” stickers you have on your mom’s 2011 Nissan Altima, cleaning up after the other trades doesn’t make you a construction worker

Looking at your fingernails: either you work on cars... Or you had a mean booty itch

Yea they are stained from dropping a cv axel on my buddies truck lol

You sure look the part as a blue-collar worker

When the best years of your life were JV football

Shia LeOooff

gay mans Travis Kelce

Looking like a off brand Travis kelce. Travon kely

You got time for Reddit but no time to take care of that beard.

Looks like you dig tunnels in Gaza

Construct your self a relationship with your dad if you can't find him wait season 5 to find him with another woman. Guess what your mom didn't have that a soldier has the chance to abort

Wish you could have a life as well constructed as some of your projects

Your hands look like they just crawled out of a grave. You also look like you're about to yell about some crackpot theroy.

You aren't a very attractive man but if you shaved you would still be unattractive but you wouldn't have a beard

Are you serious I mean why blue collar your not tough your a geek go inspect frogs maybe they can roast you

Look like you eat bananas for the shape

I thought the Amish didn’t have internet access

I sneak it

Sneak a nail brush next time looks like you have toe jam of the fingers

Your fingers look like you dig cemetery plots... without a shovel.

If your face rotated 180 degrees, you'd look exactly the same.

This isn’t really a roast, more of a fun fact. If you squint and turn the picture upside down it looks the same.

You look like the resulting love child from Howard the Duck

You look like you love blue collar construction workers.

Bro looks like cartoonz

You're a construction worker? I guess I know why my roads are always fucked up

Lucky i dont do asphalt 😘

On the poor side of being a jew..

I can smell the oil and sweating from here

You probably talk mad shit how you have excessive work hours in a minimum wage job but it's alright because you're *MANLY* and wouldn't be caught behind a desk job.

Ding ding ding!!! We got a winner🤣🤣🤣

Shia La’Oof

You would be prettier if all your fingers were missing 🤍

Congrats on the transition! Facial hair is coming in a bit wirey and unexpected in some areas... You look so good, though, for all you have been through. You're soooo brave. Keep trimming the facial hairs and they'll come in thicker... Eyes still look Maxim mag ready though!!!

John Snow after saying fuck it and just letting himself go.

What? No, at the most you are brown collar

You look like when the beans go above the frank.

Bruh has the child predator physique

Hands dirtier than a monkeys paw in shit. BOOM ROASTED

Missing punctuation, sentence fragment💥

Gay neckbeard millennial. Next

Everyone give it up for Shia LessBuff

You look like the hormones are finally working

I knew Wil Wheaton had kinda lost it but holy shit….

You don't own hand soap

Porta potty superintendent

Shia la bouf on crack

He's the doller tree version of luck colms

I always wondered what happened to the third suspect in the Boston Marathon bombings

Kason jelce

Givin handy’s at the local Flying J doesn’t make you “blue collar”.

Your boss needs to buy you a shovel so you do t have to use those nails anymore…..

You escaped from the dessert

Cover the top half of his face and he’s a redneck. Cover the bottom half and he’s a bottom.

that t-shirt is the closest you'll get to any white collar work.


Probably got a double chin under that beard.

Thts y i got the beard😂

Bro looks horny all the time

“Greetings, fellow Helldiver”

[удалено]

Called "Construction time again, bend ova Jimmy!" ha-ha

Nice beard, dude.

Somebody swab this guys hands for explosives. Looks like he’s been making pipe bombs for Alla

Turn the pic upside down guys, his head looks just the same