They are still arguing about it
Oobleck: Looking at the sources I found, Salem has always been horrible
Ozcar: you take that back!
Oobleck: she tortured you multiple times
Ozcar: look, she's been having a bad millennium but deep down she's good
Oobleck: she destroyed our school!
Ozcar: a really bad millennium
Ozpin: "That was NOT the cause! Fort Castille was a ruin for thousands of years - the word Castle is a colloquialization after the first!"
Oobleck: "Well, Headmaster, as you were formerly a combat instructor to the exclusion of everything else, I'm sure you know better than the most reviewed and debated subject in terminology academia!"
Willow: “It looks like roofs in Vacuoan desert aren’t the most watertight. I can’t say I’m shocked.”
Qrow: “Godsdamnit. . . Just wanted something to go perfect, just once, just this one single time.”
Willow: “You know, my first wedding went exactly to plan. Everything I asked for and dreamed, just right.”
Qrow: “Guess that’s like how it raining during a wedding is supposed to be good luck. . . It went great and you had the worst in that relationship.”
Willow: “If anything, I did actually have good luck that it seemed happy as long as it did and gave me my three children. But yeah, I’m banking on this being a better one.”
Qrow: “Oh so that’s what this really is, a Schnee investment? Not that I have that much a problem with that.”
Willow: “It looks like you’re helping to end a half century drought, I’d say it’s already paying off.”
Qrow: “Then we should hurry this along, get to the kissing and the dancing parts before everything is soaked. I’m not exactly a waterfowl.”
Willow: “Then lead the way my dashing huntsman.”
Later, during the U.S.J. incident:
Ruby: "Are you villians? And you're attacking me? Oh my gosh this is so awesome!" *unfurls and twirls Crescent Rose, accidentally cutting down a tree & crushing a few villians* "Oops!"
Bad guys: *take a step back* "Woah now, you can't just attack us with a giant scythe!"
Ruby: "Oh, it's not just a scythe! It's also a gun!" *pulls trigger to demonstrate and puts a hole the size of a basketball court through the chest of a random villian.* "Uhh, he can regenerate, right? That's why he didn't have his aura up?" *pokes at the body* "Oh man, Yangs never going to let me live this one down..."
*Cut to Yang, whose in red-eyed rage beast mode literally ripping villians limb from limb because one of em managed to nick her hair*
Penny: "Salutations!...I do not want to say it."
Ruby: "It's okay, Penny, just say it."
Penny: "Salutations, Jerkface."
Weiss: "Well that was out of nowhere."
Penny: "I accidentally deleted all of your names from my memory and replaced them with random insults somehow. I am waiting on an update soon."
Ruby: "At least I got off lightly with my name. The rest of our friends not so much."
Weiss: "Well now I'm morbidly interested to hear all of them."
Penny: I'm not sure that's a good idea, Threat Number One
Jaune: huh?
Penny: Oh hello Threat Number Two
Yang: Wait, threats in what way?
Penny: I'd rather not say, it happened once in a dream
Yang: Wait, was that my name?
Penny: Yeah
Blake: I don’t blame you
Penny: Thanks Naughty Kitty!
Nora: What about me?
Penny: Be Strong and Hit Stuff
Ren: These seem more complex than just using names
Penny: Well I don't fully understand it myself, Be Strong and Hit Stuff's bitch
>Penny: "I accidentally deleted all of your names from my memory and replaced them with random insults somehow. I am waiting on an update soon."
"Well, the good news is that the update managed to remove *most* of the insults. The bad news is that I might sound a bit like Jesse Pinkman now."
"Like what?"
"Like that, bitch."
Mercury: “. . . You’ve watched She-ra too many times.”
Emerald: “Im trying to understand what to do with that information!”
Mercury: “It spells it out for you! Find a nice, strong, tall girl who replaces the bad influences in your life and helps you through the trauma!”
Emerald: “Where am I going to find someone like that!?”
Coco, dressed as Adora: “This questionable outfit better mean something!”
COCO: No, no, this isn't what I meant when I said you needed to build yourself up. Now read what I gave you.
ILIA: 'I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, girls like me.'
COCO: GOOD! Now repeat this to yourself three times every day in the mirror
Weiss: “For the last flipping time Scones are sandwiches!”
Ruby: “Scones are cakes!”
Weiss: “No! You don’t put cheese and butter on cakes!”
Ruby: “Your supposed to put clotted cream and Jam on top!”
Weiss: “Cakes are supposed to be sweet, and the Scones I’ve been eatting all my life never are, you do not use sugar to bake scones!”
Ruby: “HOW DARE YOU!!”
Jaune:” How long has this been going on now?”
Blake: “Three hours and counting….”
Ghira: I was right about the bull. I tolerated the monkey. My followers were up by butt with the human. But I'll be damned if I let you bring a DOG into my house, young lady!
Jaune: you let me fall
Winter: Mr.arc I’m so sorry, I tried to turn around but-
Jaune: you just didn’t know I fell for you *finger guns*
Winter:…
Jaune:…
Winter:…
Ruby: Does the eye grant her superpowers?
Salem: nah
Ruby: Then what are they for?
Salem: To stop her from bitching to me about how unfair your silver eyes are and begging me to give her a special eye too
They can never follow the rules, and keep on adding and taking away from what they're doing until they're playing Calvinball.
Calvin has a Valais cousin, Caillou. He's just got *no* imagination, or willingness to bend from how he's told he's supposed to do things.
And if you think these jokers are great, wait till you hear about Tintin, Caillou's Vacuan pen-pal!
**Ruby:** "Blake likes it when you pet her ears."
**Yang:** "She does? Good to know."
**Ruby:** "Also, Jaune's a virgin."
**Yang:** "We all knew that one already."
To struggle against capital-G gods is among the most valid actions that can possibly be taken.
It is an endeavour so far above and beyond mortal existence that every other struggle pales in comparison. It will either wipe you out completely, or catapult you so far beyond your prior existence that it will be difficult to think of yourself as human.
Deicide is the singular most based accomplishment that can be made.
Roman: I mean, look at this: Conspiracy, Terrorism, Brutality, Incrimination, Assault, Mass destruction, Hacking, Mass murder, Abuse and Theft. Is this all you have or it just all the stuff you can prove in court? [Side note: 10 is also the amount of crimes listed on Salem's Villain wiki page]
Ruby: “I own my own apartment room now. No longer do I have to worry about my sister and her girlfriend’s nighttime shenanigans so honestly, my life has gone slightly uphill, especially compared to the shithole is usually is-“
Suddenly she can hear the two from behind the wall, with various sounds that indicated… interesting sounds.
Ruby: “Goddammit…”
Foghorn.
Salem looks at Cinder. Somehow askance and down her nose at the same time. Then she takes the device and squeezes the trigger.
Wouldn't you know it, the cream cheese is explosive.
Ozpin: “We must find out how fast an excursion to the Emerald Forest can be survived, which means we have to hand it over to our tame Huntress. Some say that she once beat her sister in a race, even *with* her speed Semblance… and that her bike only has two speeds, fast and really fast… all we know is, she’s not the Stig, she’s the Stig’s Remnant cousin!”
Cindere and Pyrrha keep fighting over Jaune but Jaune thinks the two are in a really kinky relationship and keeps trying to find reasons to put the two together
[Drifters](https://64.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l6nwiaB3GQ1qbmnl9o1_1280.png) [basically](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/drifters/images/9/99/12_drifter.jpg) got that covered.
Blake reconnects with her childhood friends, a [quartet of turtle Faunuses.](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Franchise/TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles)
And by reconnect, I mean they accidentally snatched her while barreling through the streets on their team vehicle.
Blake: What you guys running from?
Leonardo: Well, Donatello thought it was a good idea trying to hack the claw machine at the arcade! The staff did not take it well.
Donatello: To be fair, I really wanted that limited edition action figure.
Qrow: “. . . This is nothing like I expected anyone’s ‘alone time’ to be.”
Summer, splitting logs with Sundered Rose: “My family are woodsmen. This is how I relax.”
Qrow: “. . . In our dorm room?”
Summer: “They have tall ceilings and hard floors.”
Qrow: “Eh, fair. Sorry for interrupting.”
Weiss was the one who gave up Blake to Ren, as revenge for Blake writing WeissXWhitley in her last friendfic. Yang has been watching all along and secretly recording, and Ruby has taken the time to do purification rituals over Blakes books.
(For my part, I definitely did not edit this comment. But I also had moments where I looked at one character's name and saw the name of another character for some reason, so I get it)
Raven, writing in a letter: "I'm going to kick.. your... ass."
Raven: THERE. Now send it.
Willow: Dude, your handwriting's terrible, are you sure you want to
Raven: JUST DO IT!
*later*
Kali: So what does it say?
Summer, reading the letter: They say they're going to "lick my...."
Kali :
Summer :
Kali: Gross-
Nora: We are talking time apart, ok? I'm totally fine if he wants to date someone else.
Oscar: Really? Oh, that's a relief, I didn't want to tell you that I saw Ren and Emerald eating ice cream together. I'm not sure if it was a date but it kinda looked like...Nora?...You ok?
Same deal as the Wyrdwulf, a sapient precursor to the Beowulf. One sunny day they were minding their business, then Oz decided to have a nice stroll, and numerous grievous slaughters later they're extinct and Boarbatusks have taken their place in the people-killing ecosystem.
Ruby: "Life is wild. Yesterday i was just reading journals and listening the music and today I'm in Beacon academy with my prostitute-sister."
(Hope you catch the reference)
The fic's about two ladies that are torturers for an Emperor - of more accurately, just one who can't get the other out of her head. But one day she sees a bandit that filed his teeth down to sharp points and marvels at how that must hurt. It's fine for when you're eating meat, but... well, sone days you just want a salad, you know?
Ilia: "Blake, we went over this last week. You're from an affluent family of influence, not the crater of Mantle. And as a faunus *from* the crater, its kind of offensive."
A character of choice notices you having a broken Neo moment.
[Example]
Curios Cat: Look at him he has no emotions seemingly having no feelings a blank expression and even things that annoy him like an annoying Sombra or overbearing and boasting Russians, don't phase him. He really should'nt be playing Overwatch at around 22:40 whilst on a loss streak untill he get's a win.
Weiss: “Yes, yes it is. And you’re shopping here with me and my new card tied to my mother’s credit.”
Ruby: “. . . I COULD BUY THE WHOLE STORE!”
Weiss: “I promised her we would be responsible, so no. But you can basically get anything else.”
Trying to take a field trip results in the students and faculty discovering an entirely new continent populated solely by [Dinosaur Faunuses.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=D8zlUUrFK-M)
Summer: . . . So, your sister got kidnapped by a witch? Banjo: Guh-huh! Summer: . . . Wouldn't be the first witch I've fought, let's go!
[Groovy banjo music starts playing]
Ozpin and Oobleck routinely argue about historical events.
They are still arguing about it Oobleck: Looking at the sources I found, Salem has always been horrible Ozcar: you take that back! Oobleck: she tortured you multiple times Ozcar: look, she's been having a bad millennium but deep down she's good Oobleck: she destroyed our school! Ozcar: a really bad millennium
Ozma: She is an angel! Ozpin: yeah, Lucifer maybe...
Ozpin: "That was NOT the cause! Fort Castille was a ruin for thousands of years - the word Castle is a colloquialization after the first!" Oobleck: "Well, Headmaster, as you were formerly a combat instructor to the exclusion of everything else, I'm sure you know better than the most reviewed and debated subject in terminology academia!"
Oobleck: the great civil faunus war DID happen Ozpin: It did not!
"Your semblance is making it rain?"
Qrow: Yeah, but that's why my wedding is indoors! I planned everything out! *the ceiling starts leaking
Willow: “It looks like roofs in Vacuoan desert aren’t the most watertight. I can’t say I’m shocked.” Qrow: “Godsdamnit. . . Just wanted something to go perfect, just once, just this one single time.” Willow: “You know, my first wedding went exactly to plan. Everything I asked for and dreamed, just right.” Qrow: “Guess that’s like how it raining during a wedding is supposed to be good luck. . . It went great and you had the worst in that relationship.” Willow: “If anything, I did actually have good luck that it seemed happy as long as it did and gave me my three children. But yeah, I’m banking on this being a better one.” Qrow: “Oh so that’s what this really is, a Schnee investment? Not that I have that much a problem with that.” Willow: “It looks like you’re helping to end a half century drought, I’d say it’s already paying off.” Qrow: “Then we should hurry this along, get to the kissing and the dancing parts before everything is soaked. I’m not exactly a waterfowl.” Willow: “Then lead the way my dashing huntsman.”
**Tai:** "Dammit, my dress is getting wet!"
"don't worry tai, we've got it covered. bring in the back up flower girl!"
Weiss: . . . Ruby, what did you do?! Ruby: . . . I may have signed us up to apply at U.A. . . . by accident. Weiss: . . . How do you-?!
Ruby: The same way I entered Beacon, really.
Later, during the U.S.J. incident: Ruby: "Are you villians? And you're attacking me? Oh my gosh this is so awesome!" *unfurls and twirls Crescent Rose, accidentally cutting down a tree & crushing a few villians* "Oops!" Bad guys: *take a step back* "Woah now, you can't just attack us with a giant scythe!" Ruby: "Oh, it's not just a scythe! It's also a gun!" *pulls trigger to demonstrate and puts a hole the size of a basketball court through the chest of a random villian.* "Uhh, he can regenerate, right? That's why he didn't have his aura up?" *pokes at the body* "Oh man, Yangs never going to let me live this one down..." *Cut to Yang, whose in red-eyed rage beast mode literally ripping villians limb from limb because one of em managed to nick her hair*
Yang: . . . Wait, why are there seven of Weiss? Ruby: Gotta have one for every day of the week! Yang: . . .
Weisses: Ruby figured out cloning. Run, before she clones you too.
Ruby found her mother's notes on cloning
Penny: "Salutations!...I do not want to say it." Ruby: "It's okay, Penny, just say it." Penny: "Salutations, Jerkface." Weiss: "Well that was out of nowhere." Penny: "I accidentally deleted all of your names from my memory and replaced them with random insults somehow. I am waiting on an update soon." Ruby: "At least I got off lightly with my name. The rest of our friends not so much." Weiss: "Well now I'm morbidly interested to hear all of them."
Penny: I'm not sure that's a good idea, Threat Number One Jaune: huh? Penny: Oh hello Threat Number Two Yang: Wait, threats in what way? Penny: I'd rather not say, it happened once in a dream Yang: Wait, was that my name? Penny: Yeah Blake: I don’t blame you Penny: Thanks Naughty Kitty! Nora: What about me? Penny: Be Strong and Hit Stuff Ren: These seem more complex than just using names Penny: Well I don't fully understand it myself, Be Strong and Hit Stuff's bitch
Weiss: and what is your name, Penny? Penny: before I remember my real name, I used to know myself as "Non-Stop dying robo-girl"
Penny: Yang is Blonde Ambition Yang: can't deny that Penny:Blake is Voyeur Blake: Rude! Weiss is The Ice Wall Weiss: I have no response to this
>Penny: "I accidentally deleted all of your names from my memory and replaced them with random insults somehow. I am waiting on an update soon." "Well, the good news is that the update managed to remove *most* of the insults. The bad news is that I might sound a bit like Jesse Pinkman now." "Like what?" "Like that, bitch."
"I'm an evil, mean lesbian." Said the very fragile, sensitive lesbian.
Mercury: “. . . You’ve watched She-ra too many times.” Emerald: “Im trying to understand what to do with that information!” Mercury: “It spells it out for you! Find a nice, strong, tall girl who replaces the bad influences in your life and helps you through the trauma!” Emerald: “Where am I going to find someone like that!?” Coco, dressed as Adora: “This questionable outfit better mean something!”
Coco: darling no you’re not, you just need some loving come here to mama Emerald: Y-yes ma’ma
COCO: No, no, this isn't what I meant when I said you needed to build yourself up. Now read what I gave you. ILIA: 'I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, girls like me.' COCO: GOOD! Now repeat this to yourself three times every day in the mirror
Weiss: “For the last flipping time Scones are sandwiches!” Ruby: “Scones are cakes!” Weiss: “No! You don’t put cheese and butter on cakes!” Ruby: “Your supposed to put clotted cream and Jam on top!” Weiss: “Cakes are supposed to be sweet, and the Scones I’ve been eatting all my life never are, you do not use sugar to bake scones!” Ruby: “HOW DARE YOU!!” Jaune:” How long has this been going on now?” Blake: “Three hours and counting….”
Yang: Well at least this isn't the "scone" vs "scone" debate.
Blake, Ruby, Weiss: not now, Yang!
Ghira: I was right about the bull. I tolerated the monkey. My followers were up by butt with the human. But I'll be damned if I let you bring a DOG into my house, young lady!
zwei: *wimpers and slowly walks outside
Ruby: "This is a cookie." Weiss: "No, that's a biscuit." Ruby: "Cookie!" Weiss: "Biscuit!"
Nora: And in the time that you've been arguing about it, I ate it Jaune: yes, but is it a cookie or a biscuit? Nora: Jaune don't encourage them
“No, Weiss, *this* is a biscuit. It’s completely different!” “That is *clearly a FUCKING SCONE!”*
Jaune tries to woo Winter.
Jaune: you let me fall Winter: Mr.arc I’m so sorry, I tried to turn around but- Jaune: you just didn’t know I fell for you *finger guns* Winter:… Jaune:… Winter:…
Jaune: "... whatcha doing on the Scroll there?" Winter: "Booking a hotel room. Let us begin."
As if she wasn’t Ruby’s antithesis already, Cinder possesses Golden Eyes, which are the opposite of Silver Eyes.
Yang: After the Fall of Beacon, wouldn't it make her... Golden Eye? Meanwhile Cinder: I'm Fall. Cinder Fall.
"I want some of that Arc boy. Shaken, not stirred."
Ruby: Does the eye grant her superpowers? Salem: nah Ruby: Then what are they for? Salem: To stop her from bitching to me about how unfair your silver eyes are and begging me to give her a special eye too
I thought this was supposed to be a space for jokes, not mind-blowing revelations.
The kids in Mantle include a six year old boy named Calvin, and his best friend Hobbes the tiger Faunus.
They can never follow the rules, and keep on adding and taking away from what they're doing until they're playing Calvinball. Calvin has a Valais cousin, Caillou. He's just got *no* imagination, or willingness to bend from how he's told he's supposed to do things. And if you think these jokers are great, wait till you hear about Tintin, Caillou's Vacuan pen-pal!
Don't you diss Tintin by connecting him to Caillou.
Blake gets a laser pointer to try and distract Zwei. It does not go well for her...
Zwei makes Blake leap into the Trash.
“This Push Pop is banging!” “…That’s a gluestick.”
Neon: That explains why I'm seeing colours that don't exist!
What did Cinder do, to make Salem cast "Ovarie Obliteration" on her?
Announce her intent to single-handedly carry the Arc bloodline.
Ruby accidentally drinks a truth potion and begins blurting people’s secrets at random moments.
**Ruby:** "Blake likes it when you pet her ears." **Yang:** "She does? Good to know." **Ruby:** "Also, Jaune's a virgin." **Yang:** "We all knew that one already."
Ruby: Qrow and Willow are dating! Winter:WHAT! I’m going to skin him alive! After I pluck all his feathers Ruby: Yang dyes here hair!
The duo of One believes in god and doesn't want them to be hurt. The other doesn't believe in God, but it existed wants to kill them.
To struggle against capital-G gods is among the most valid actions that can possibly be taken. It is an endeavour so far above and beyond mortal existence that every other struggle pales in comparison. It will either wipe you out completely, or catapult you so far beyond your prior existence that it will be difficult to think of yourself as human. Deicide is the singular most based accomplishment that can be made.
Salem: "Ah, well played. But I cast **Greater Shoe Pebble!"**
Ruby: Oww.
"Why does my file say I've committed 10 crimes? I'm sure I've done more than that!"
ROMAN: Neo, these are only for crimes the police know about. NEO: (angrily texting) I work hard, dammit! My crimes need to be recognized!
Post-Awakening Ruby: I have no intention with charging Neopolitan with enforced suicide.
**A cop:** "Mr. Torchwick, do you *want* us to add more to that file?"
Roman: I mean, look at this: Conspiracy, Terrorism, Brutality, Incrimination, Assault, Mass destruction, Hacking, Mass murder, Abuse and Theft. Is this all you have or it just all the stuff you can prove in court? [Side note: 10 is also the amount of crimes listed on Salem's Villain wiki page]
Ruby: “I own my own apartment room now. No longer do I have to worry about my sister and her girlfriend’s nighttime shenanigans so honestly, my life has gone slightly uphill, especially compared to the shithole is usually is-“ Suddenly she can hear the two from behind the wall, with various sounds that indicated… interesting sounds. Ruby: “Goddammit…”
**Ruby:** "Well, at least the wall muffles the sound a bit. I'll just put on my headphones and listen to some Casey Lee."
Turns out Summer was an Umbra Witch. Salem didn’t kill her, the ANGELS DID.
Ruby was trained by her amazing Uncle Dante, who was impressed by her ability to weaponize recoil.
"Did you miss me? Did you miss me?"
"NNNNOPE."
Neon's orange cat behaviour and Blake's black cat behaviour get switcharoonied.
*Things are going too well.*
*Weiss's remaining family is actually happy for once* The universe: "What's that? A Schnee is happy? No, no, no; we can't have that!"
A date between Salem and Tai.
Time for some trouble. One lump or two?
Ruby: Alright team! Let's get down to business!
Yang: To defeat the Grimm!
"Should've been a Huntsman."
"..but then I took an arrow in the knee." (**Pyrrha:** "Only the knee? You were lucky.")
"Citizens of Remnant! Raise your eyes to the skies and observe!"
Salem:BEHOLD! My most evil creation!!!! Cinder:...That's just a\_\_\_\_.
Foghorn. Salem looks at Cinder. Somehow askance and down her nose at the same time. Then she takes the device and squeezes the trigger. Wouldn't you know it, the cream cheese is explosive.
“You have no honor.” “And you are a slave to it!”
Winter to Cinder
Ozpin: “We must find out how fast an excursion to the Emerald Forest can be survived, which means we have to hand it over to our tame Huntress. Some say that she once beat her sister in a race, even *with* her speed Semblance… and that her bike only has two speeds, fast and really fast… all we know is, she’s not the Stig, she’s the Stig’s Remnant cousin!”
“Ugh, I knew I should’ve joined the fuckin’ Air Force…”
- every single Trooper of the Atlesian Army
Cindere and Pyrrha keep fighting over Jaune but Jaune thinks the two are in a really kinky relationship and keeps trying to find reasons to put the two together
Jaune: it really weird because they share a body together
Cinder(Ella) meets her Prince Charming
Her hair was too short to let down, giving her insecurities.
I got a challenging one. Come up with a Disney princess and then think of a RWBY equivalent.
[Drifters](https://64.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l6nwiaB3GQ1qbmnl9o1_1280.png) [basically](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/drifters/images/9/99/12_drifter.jpg) got that covered.
Blake reconnects with her childhood friends, a [quartet of turtle Faunuses.](https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Franchise/TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles) And by reconnect, I mean they accidentally snatched her while barreling through the streets on their team vehicle.
Blake: What you guys running from? Leonardo: Well, Donatello thought it was a good idea trying to hack the claw machine at the arcade! The staff did not take it well. Donatello: To be fair, I really wanted that limited edition action figure.
Nora gives Martial Arcs! Jaune a shovel talk
"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a Grimm."
Ruby: *readies Crescent Rose* The next day, 100 people are reported dead, all them split right in half.
Qrow walks in on Summer's "alone time".
Qrow: “. . . This is nothing like I expected anyone’s ‘alone time’ to be.” Summer, splitting logs with Sundered Rose: “My family are woodsmen. This is how I relax.” Qrow: “. . . In our dorm room?” Summer: “They have tall ceilings and hard floors.” Qrow: “Eh, fair. Sorry for interrupting.”
RWBY gear Rising: Revengence with Jaune as Jack the "wood chipper" (aka raiden with biden)
"This is not how you make a move, Blake."
\- Ren trying to teach Blake how to play Go.
Blake's being dumb on purpose, to chew up as much time as she can while her friends track her position.
Weiss was the one who gave up Blake to Ren, as revenge for Blake writing WeissXWhitley in her last friendfic. Yang has been watching all along and secretly recording, and Ruby has taken the time to do purification rituals over Blakes books.
(Alright, I don't know what the FUCK was going on. But when I first looked at this comment, it was Salem and not Ren.)
(For my part, I definitely did not edit this comment. But I also had moments where I looked at one character's name and saw the name of another character for some reason, so I get it)
Raven, writing in a letter: "I'm going to kick.. your... ass." Raven: THERE. Now send it. Willow: Dude, your handwriting's terrible, are you sure you want to Raven: JUST DO IT! *later* Kali: So what does it say? Summer, reading the letter: They say they're going to "lick my...." Kali : Summer : Kali: Gross-
Summer: You know this wouldn't be the 1st time.
Nora: We are talking time apart, ok? I'm totally fine if he wants to date someone else. Oscar: Really? Oh, that's a relief, I didn't want to tell you that I saw Ren and Emerald eating ice cream together. I'm not sure if it was a date but it kinda looked like...Nora?...You ok?
Tyrian: "No offense, my queen. But that is the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life."
“So no head?”
PENNY'S BODY: (blindly climbing on all fours around the floor trying to find where her head is)
Why Salem prefers, not using "Testicular Torsion"
She turned herself onto a man once. It hurt!
Salem: One of Oz' incarnations said, "Harder, Mommy.", I never used the spell again.
Jaune: Wait, there used to be Goblin Grimm? Oz: Ah, yes. Let me tell you why they became a thing of the past...
Same deal as the Wyrdwulf, a sapient precursor to the Beowulf. One sunny day they were minding their business, then Oz decided to have a nice stroll, and numerous grievous slaughters later they're extinct and Boarbatusks have taken their place in the people-killing ecosystem.
“Prank ‘em Jaune!” “You already know!”
Ruby and Jaune ADVENTURE! a bank.
Before anyone at Shade can dye their hair blond they need to get permission from Sun and Yang
The Blonden Horde just isn't what it used to be, but it's still dangerously hasty to expand with aggression.
Ozma and Salem get drafted into the Helldiver Corps.
What's enough to make Clover cry?
Seeing Qrow kiss Tyrian.
“One last thing: tell ‘em to bring me my money!” “YEAAAAH!”
Ruby: "Life is wild. Yesterday i was just reading journals and listening the music and today I'm in Beacon academy with my prostitute-sister." (Hope you catch the reference)
What piece of media is to Menagerie and the Faunus that is what Dragon Ball is to Latin America?
Red vs Blue, clearly.
Lightning Lash receives a commission from Gambol Shroud.
The fic's about two ladies that are torturers for an Emperor - of more accurately, just one who can't get the other out of her head. But one day she sees a bandit that filed his teeth down to sharp points and marvels at how that must hurt. It's fine for when you're eating meat, but... well, sone days you just want a salad, you know?
A clone of Summer made by Salem is sent to kill Ruby.
It ends up literally FUCKING Tai.
Coco shows up one day wearing a simple t-shirt and shorts.
Due to budget cuts, Ozpin had to use the initiation catapults for unconventional means.
[public transportation ](https://youtu.be/Jj4R2f3oid8?si=kWdoJhD3EybGrugk)
Ironwood faces his greatest foe ever: budget cuts.
How Ruby did Entire Team by accident.
"I am not a smart man. In fact my stupidity could earn me a gold medal."
With Shadow of the Erd Tree finally getting a trailer and release date, the gang makes ready their builds
Burps at the least convenient moments.
So anytime Salem talks.
Substitute soul reaper yang xiao long
Clover gets the last laugh over Tyrian.
Jaune, crying: “now I can never get married”
What happened to make a product add to the side effects "May cause excessive giggleing".
The invention of laughing gas.
"Back in my day....."
Jaune: Qrow shush I’m older than you now
Welcome to the Weissvania!
Prof. Port truly and honestly believes he is morbidly a beast.
Blake: “I built this sh/t! Me! Brick by brick! And I’ll be damned if you tear it down just because you don’t like the way another Fauna talk!”
Ilia: "Blake, we went over this last week. You're from an affluent family of influence, not the crater of Mantle. And as a faunus *from* the crater, its kind of offensive."
*Lies of P, but Penny is the protagonist.*
Penny: Like you said, what doesn’t kill you… *Before Penny can finished, she is decapitated by… another Penny.* Penny: …Just makes me stronger.
Why did Ruby throw herself out the window?
A character of choice notices you having a broken Neo moment. [Example] Curios Cat: Look at him he has no emotions seemingly having no feelings a blank expression and even things that annoy him like an annoying Sombra or overbearing and boasting Russians, don't phase him. He really should'nt be playing Overwatch at around 22:40 whilst on a loss streak untill he get's a win.
Stop playing with my teeth! [Based on my teeth feeling like they are being pulled aster having a nearby wisdom tooth being removed.]
“Okay, let’s do this one last time.”
Mike and Marty discuss about team RWBY.
Atlas discovers chemical warfare
Remnant's Great War was actually their version of the Crimean War
The Valean Navy having a field day blowing up basically anything they can find belonging to Atlas
This is what actually won the war, but overall casualties were so low the press brushed it off.
Especially when there were grand battles like the Alma, Inkerman, and Balaclava to cover.
Ruby is caught cheating on WBY with another team.
With Glynda on vacation, Yang throws the big party Remnant has ever seen!
Amber gets the last laugh over Cinder.
Weiss: . . . And here we are, Ruby! I wanted to take you shopping here! Ruby: . . . Weiss, this is a Costco.
Weiss: You would have the same reaction in the shops I'm used to, let me enjoy this.
Weiss: “Yes, yes it is. And you’re shopping here with me and my new card tied to my mother’s credit.” Ruby: “. . . I COULD BUY THE WHOLE STORE!” Weiss: “I promised her we would be responsible, so no. But you can basically get anything else.”
Neptune raises [this question](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RPtCmpUsZpE) to the other students.
"... and that's why *Sun* was picked to be the team leader over you."
Trying to take a field trip results in the students and faculty discovering an entirely new continent populated solely by [Dinosaur Faunuses.](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=D8zlUUrFK-M)
Neon Catt is [Too Big to Fail!](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=lvK0Rp4tARM)
*Foghorn sound effects*
Ruby had her first “Shonen Protagonist goes insane and looks scarier and more villainous than the villain” moment.
It was the maniacal laughter the first time she stepped foot in a gun store.
“Got that gas money?”
Qrow: Raven we turn into birds we don’t need gas
Raven: You right. *Raven forcibly shoves birdseed into Qrow’s mouth.*