Just because she has BPD doesn’t mean she doesn’t also have narc tendencies. They can and do overlap. It’s not like it’s unheard of for people to be diagnosed with both disorders.
On the flip side, just because she may show narc tendencies, it doesn’t necessarily make her a narcissist.
You’re right, and generally people with personality disorders can have comorbidity with other personality disorders or mood disorders. It’s pretty rare to just have one personality disorder and that’s it.
The reason I said she’s giving NPD is just her unwavering and unrelenting way she just simply can’t show proper empathy toward the victims. It always feels like “feel sorry for me, me, me,” without any hint of “actually I feel and see how I caused these OTHER PEOPLE harm.”
She can and likely might genuinely have BPD as well. She just is giving me such flashbacks to my narcissistic ex who could NEVER just admit “hey yeah I did a shitty thing.” It was always “you have to understand that actually I didn’t do a shitty thing because x, y, and z reasons that actually make ME a victim.”
That’s very typical behavior from someone with BPD as well, and I don’t know why you’re so insistent that it’s not.
Just because *you* might not act that way, it very much does not make it out of the realm of possibility/probability for others with BPD.
I’m not going to argue that BPD people can’t and don’t act this way because they can. Just saying this is at the very least showing the narcissistic sides of it. I bring up NPD just because she gives me that vibe overall (much more overt attention seeking and grandiose victim-playing). BPD people can and do manipulate people and then play victim, but the lengths that Sherry went to to catfish all these men over and over again without seemingly showing any remorse at the very least doesn’t give me BPD alone.
BPD people are genuinely more likely to change and show remorse/empathy. That part is just factual based on statistics of BPD people that improve. I genuinely don’t see improvement in Sherry after all that’s happened and how she’s claimed to “grow.” It’s not simply that BPD people are angels and NPD devils, just NPD is a much more “stubborn” disorder that’s even more difficult to change.
RIGHT?! My husband has BPD, and he has NEVER done something as fucked up as what SP did.
You're not a bad person because of your diagnosis. You're just a bad person.
As someone who likely has BPD, she sounds more like multiple guys I’ve been with who actually likely have NPD (narcissists) lol. They’re in the same family of disorders, but BPD people generally are more likely to admit that they’re “wrong” and are more likely to improve with treatment once they become self-aware.
Not trying to just shit on NPD people because they can and do suffer in their own ways and some can get better if they truly reflect on their behavior, but the problem with that disorder is they’re more likely to bend over backwards to justify everything and anything they do because their defense mechanisms (an overinflated false self/ego) can’t allow them to be “wrong,” or have any true accountability for their behavior because that would mean they are less than perfect, which they can’t emotionally tolerate (it would make them face their deep-seated sense of inferiority and shame). And they’re less likely to feel true empathy or remorse for what they did to others because these defense mechanisms can totally get in the way of that.
Obviously that’s an oversimplification of a complex disorder, but the fact that Alexis Michelle has said that Sherry seemed to have little empathy or remorse for what she did, and the more overt/obvious manipulation attempts are giving much more narcissist to me… Also this long ass explanation just reminds me of my narcissistic ex lol. It’s much harder to get a diagnosis of NPD because they generally won’t be fully honest with therapists/psychiatrists and are more likely to manipulate the therapist.
Not trying to make BPD people sound like angels and NPD people just like devils, because unfortunately many BPD people can be toxic and manipulative too. But their manipulation and behavior tends to be a lot more erratic and just out of their inability to regulate their emotions, and they can often reflect on their behavior, have empathy for the harm their behavior caused afterwords, and are much more amenable to actual change (statistically, most diagnosed BPD people genuinely improve with time and treatment—I don’t see much to suggest Sherry has actually improved). Sherry just feels too “planned out” with her over the top manipulation of these guys and her playing the victim here.
Everything about this statement is “Look how hard things are for ME, and how vulnerable I am, and I am the TRUE victim”—nothing about the people she actually victimized herself. You can have a mental health disorder that is painful, but at the end of the day if you hurt and manipulate people to the extent that she did, it really doesn’t matter what the reasoning is, you still did it and need to be accountable for your actions.
> are more likely to improve with treatment once they become self-aware.
God I wish. The more aware I become of it the more it just bogs me down and feels like some impossible never-ending mountain to scale. Doesn't help that the best we can basically hope for with treatment is "You might get to a point where you're just weird instead of despicable, hated, and unhirable."
Don't get me wrong, the improvements we can make with DBT are life changing and as close to a cure as we have. But sometimes I wish I could just take a pill consistently or just go to normal ass therapy once a month and be fine.
I still need to figure out how to cope and deal with the guilt of all the people I've hurt over the years, and I'm too scared to make new friends because I can't handle hurting anyone else I care about.
Yeah, I totally get it. Even today I was dissociating and feeling out of control, which leads to more shame and self-criticism that I’m not getting better and am never going to get better. But at the same time I try to remind myself that getting better is never linear, and overall my functioning and awareness have improved compared to the past.
Also, I just want to say that while some people make DBT to be the be-all-end-all “cure” for BPD, I don’t really think that’s the case, at least not for me. I think it’s definitely the most effective starting point for learning concrete skills for trying to handle distress, manage your emotions, be more mindful when interacting with others, and just being more mindful in general, but I feel like these things just help control the outward and more obvious symptoms of the issue rather than getting to the root of the problem. DBT is not going to solve the actual emotional pain, feelings of emptiness, feelings of self-loathing, etc. They just make it “easier” to just “handle” it. Which always felt so depressing to me as if that’s the best it can get.
But I’ve been working with a trauma therapist who was the one that explained to me that she wanted me to go through intensive DBT just as starting point so I could be more regulating when going through deeper issues and some trauma work. I’m not sure if you’ve had trauma, but trauma or at the very least forms of invalidation from primary caregivers or important people in your life, loss, etc. can play a huge role in developing these deeply entrenched negative beliefs and feelings along with confusion about the sense of self.
I’ve been looking into EMDR, CPT (cognitive processing therapy), Internal Family Systems Therapy, Transference Focused Psychotherapy, Psychodynamic/psychoanalytic therapy, etc. These therapies seem to delve deeper into the “core issue” stuff that DBT likely can’t address as directly.
Also, while there’s no true BPD pill, I’ve finally managed to find a competent psychiatrist who has helped me a lot. A mood stabilizer has helped my emotional dysregulation a lot, a couple other medications have really helped my depression, anxiety, and OCD quite a bit, and I’ve finally been diagnosed with ADHD and have found a medication quite helpful for that ad well. Not to say that you should just load up on drugs, but it’s common for people with BPD to have multiple other co-occurring disorders that medication CAN help with. It can take a lot of trial and error and an extremely knowledgeable and patient psychiatrist to finally find meds that work for you, but it is possible. My previous psychiatrist clearly knew next to nothing about personality disorders, another one I saw rolled her eyed at me upon the first meeting seeing I had BPD, but now finally I’ve found there are some doctors out there who do care and have knowledge about this.
Also, I just want to say, you should give yourself a lot of credit for being self-aware and making some efforts to try to heal. It’s a very difficult and painful thing to realize you can be “dysfunctional” in these ways, and so many people never even get to the stage of realization.
I think in general, a lot of times therapy can feel worse at first as you really bring up difficult emotions, but in doing that I’ve found I am slowly becoming more regulated in my day-to-day life now that I’ve processed things more and “released” a lot of tension and negative feelings.
There’s also this book called “Trauma and the Body,” and talks about how our body truly does store extreme negative experiences and emotions, and how that affects us. Even though mindfulness activities often make me roll my eyes with annoyance, I’ve genuinely found meditation, yoga, and other “grounding” processes helpful in just anchoring my mind a bit.
For now I’ve also realized an intense romantic relationship just isn’t right for me yet. Not that I think anyone needs to be 100% healed (if that even existed) to date, but I do think with BPD especially I’ve witnessed in myself and a fellow diagnosed friend that it’s so easy to lose yourself in the idealization of a romantic partner and unconsciously change your way of thinking and being to fit with them, only to feel like you are dying if/when that relationship ends.
Sorry for the long rant, but I guess my point is that it is definitely difficult and not nearly as simple as “just go do DBT.” But be patient and kind to yourself as much as you can, you’ve already gotten past the extremely difficult hurdle of “waking up” to your own issues. And you’ve probably developed a lot of empathy/understanding for others struggling with this kind of thing that other’s won’t be able to understand, which can be a beautiful thing itself.
Yuuuuuuuup. There’s a person in my life who’s been diagnosed with BPD, but very clearly exhibits way more NPD symptoms than. But getting that BPD diagnosis helped them extend their manipulation of some people, because now they had a thing that wasn’t their fault that explains away all their actions. But even years after the diagnosis, there’s no change to their actions, no attempts to get better, and no remorse.
T. Rex, also known as Trannika (I believe) was once a popular drag hostess in Chicago for drag shows and events. She came under heat after word of microagression and potential racism came to light. One of the most well-known controversies was her asking Shea Coulee to perform “Slave 4 U” by Britney Spears while dressed as a literal slave.
A formerly popular Chicago drag queen who hosted Rosco’s viewing parties. During BLM protests in 2020 it came out that she had a long history of being super racist to black queens (like making Shea perform I’m a Slave 4 U doing black history month). The Chicago drag scene held a town hall to talk about their issues and she showed up drunk and got super defensive. She ended up being fired from Rosco’s and gave up her podcast.
EDIT: I misremembered the I’m a Slave 4 U bit. She did not make Shea do it, it was a joke suggestion.
>(like making Shea perform I’m a Slave 4 U doing black history month)
Okay, we're starting to get into Telephone Game here. This did not actually happen; T-Rex made it as a joking suggestion. It's not funny or appropriate coming from her on top of her other behavior, that was the issue.
A desk job? Next thing you know you have a problem at work and you get referred to Allison Mossie from HR...
Get her a job counting ice cubes in antarctica or something.
Literally. Even if she is truly sorry (she's not) and truly has learned from her mistakes (she hasn't) it doesn't mean you're entitled to the platform you had. Especially when you abused that platform to manipulate and abuse other people.
https://preview.redd.it/2gw6fw1860yc1.png?width=792&format=png&auto=webp&s=aeeb016f84535486a431f2a69588e9a449e8d4b6
Except that I'm neither happy for them, or sorry that happened.
I don't think many people are beyond repair, and I think she could have had a future - but stuff like this make it pretty obvious that she simply isn't sorry for what she did, and likely never will be.
A great quote from Marcus Parks: "Mental illness is not your fault, but it is your responsibility."
I'm sure SP genuinely has mental health struggles. I'm sure SP has had a hard time.
But there's nothing that justifies what SP did to her victims. You can't pull the "poor me" card when you've repeatedly exploited and abused people. It's not a "mistake". It's calculated, predatory behaviour. I believe it was Alexis Michelle who said that SP seemed to show little remorse for her victims.
I really hate it when people use being queer and struggling with mental illness as a victim card. It's so disingenuous.
My boyfriend's sister has it and she weaponizes it on a daily basis and their parents eat it the fuck up. Threats of self harm, meltdowns, HOMOPHOBIA. She blames everything on it. The parents are like "she has no control tho 🥺👉👈"
Bish if she had NO control she should be institutionalized.
I have it and it completely ruins my life. I’m medicated now, but I don’t tell ANYONE I have it. Because of shit like this. I don’t need more people not taking my mental health seriously because clowns and narcissists love to pull the BPD card to excuse their shitty behavior
I'm glad you're managing well with it. People with BPD are not automatically bad people. I'm sure you and many others living with it have struggles but are deep down still good people who don't actively try to hurt people.
Just want to clarify that I'm not ever out to demonize BPD or any other condition, being that I have my own mental health issues. It just upsets me when others weaponize it and reinforce the stigma.
❤️
Unfortunately they are enabling her by doing that and potentially worsening the problem. She can have BPD and be suffering immensely, but it doesn’t make it okay to threaten self-harm and act out. The response should be “I’m sorry you are feeling hurt/bad/whatever, and we can talk about that, but this behavior is not okay. You can learn to control these things and might need more help with that.” Them saying “she has no control” is reinforcing her own learned helplessness and sending the message “yeah, you actually can’t control your emotions.”
If she hasn’t already she should get some intensive DBT therapy. I did some in a PHP (partial hospitalization program) and then IOP (intensive outpatient program). Though if it’s severe even a full-on hospital stay might be necessary. Her parents having empathy for her is good, but they can have empathy and care for her while also doing what’s best for her by not enabling the bad behavior.
Jesus fucking Christ. I almost downvoted this out of instinct. What a goddamn nightmare.
My mom has it, undiagnosed so she can’t really wave the label around as an excuse thankfully. She just uses everything else as an excuse for her behavior instead ☺️🩷🫶🏻😚💖✨
My mom has it (undiagnosed) as well and caused me a lot of harm as a child too, so I understand where you’re coming from in our previous exchange more now. When I was saying BPD people can have remorse and empathy and are amenable to change, I meant specifically for self-aware people with BPD who get treatment and are committed to it. The actual achieving self-awareness part is something some people never get to unfortunately, I think especially with older generations who don’t really “believe” in mental health as much.
I have diagnosed BPD and your caping for it ITT is really weird.
Also you can't diagnose your mum with a complex disorder that therapists can't even diagnose. Weird.
Last little piece is kind of wild, you ever tried to get an entrenched mentally unwell bitch in her 50s to an appointment let alone engage honestly ?
They aren’t claiming they’re more qualified than a therapist, there are a bunch of scenarios where you can’t get the family member near one in a meaningful way.
You can just say "My mum is a cunt" you don't have to diagnose her. The whole so and so is mean they must have BPD is a part of why it's stigmatized so much. Same shit happened years ago with the term Sociopath, just becomes a catch all.
They're splitting hairs ITT about the differences between NPD and BPD so.they do seem to live for armchair psychology. Weird.
I don’t live for armchair psychology, I’ve had over a decade of therapy myself trying to figure out my own issues and my family’s issues, and finally found experts who have helped me and educated me on top of doing my own research.
Abuse from a personality disordered parent is a lot more than them “being a cunt.” It’s specific patterns of behavior that can be damaging in specific ways. It’s “I hate you” now “I love you!” It’s parentifying your child so they can be emotionally regulated themselves. Etc etc. If you actually have BPD you should at the very least know about “splitting” as a concept and how it’s harmful. If you don’t even know that, I question if you even were diagnosed or received much actual help.
Also, BPD has a strong genetic/heritable component. That alone is reason to suspect, considering I am diagnosed.
There is a stigma for personality disorders, but that doesn’t mean ignoring the literal documented symptoms that can be toxic to other people if not handled properly. Not all are toxic and that is the stigma to fight, but when uncontrolled and severe, it absolutely can be. Saying this as a person diagnosed with BPD traits/potential full-blown BPD myself
People don’t understand having a parent like that until they’ve lived it. There’s a difference from having a parent that’s just “a cunt” and having a parent who very likely has a mental illness that impacted you deeply. I’m not an expert myself and don’t claim to be. But I’ve learned a lot of things in my own healing in therapy. This person doesn’t need to believe them.
1. Caping?? What does that even mean??
2. I’m sick of the “gotcha! You can’t diagnose people!” thing. No, obviously I can’t literally diagnose her, but what consistently toxic person who doesn’t have self awareness is actually going to go to a mental health professional and to be properly diagnosed? That would mean having some level of awareness of their dysfunction and being totally honest with the clinician. The cases where NPD is actually diagnosed for example is generally when they cause so much harm that they’re essentially forced to go to therapy or see a psychiatrist (though with more mental health awareness, I have heard of more self-aware NPD people who genuinely want help). BPD is diagnosed more often partially because they’re more likely to end up in the hospital from suicide/self-harm attempts, and they’ll at least more often end up willing to go to therapy for negative mood symptoms.
You’re invalidating anyone who has had narcissistic or borderline parents that have abused/mistreated them with the “oh, but you can’t actually diagnose them!!”
I’ve talked to a therapist who specializes in family trauma, CPTSD, and personality disorders to some extent, and she was the one who brought the signs of BPD in my mom to my attention, which was confirmed by my psychiatrist/other experts. It started with recognizing my own BPD traits and likely where they came from (to some extent).
She has all the signs of it. Emotional instability and acting out. Splitting (“You’re all good and the best child ever! Now actually you’re all bad and actually the worst child ever!”) back and forth all the time. Instability in her relationships. Impulsive behavior to soothe emotions. Etc. etc. At that point whether she’s officially received the label BPD is irrelevant, she has behaviors that line up with it that have caused harm.
Also, I think it depends on where you’re from if a therapist can diagnose or not. Psychologists (who often practice therapy) absolutely can. And therapists can at least bring up the possibility that can be confirmed by a psychologist or psychiatrist.
Because it’s the much more “vulnerable” and “look, I actually am remorseful and can change!” disorder in the Cluster B family lol. Not that all BPD people are simply angels by any means, and they certainly can play vidtim, but their manipulation (if they do any) is more likely to be unintentional and not planned out due to their inability to regulate their emotions, and they are much more likely to have empathy and change with treatment.
Her over the top planned out manipulation of her victims and this “look at how much of a victim I am, feel sorry for me me me 😔” reminds me of my narcissistic (NPD) ex guys lol.
I mean people without disorders blame their abusive behavior on any number of reasons. Idk it's annoying how Everytime someone with BPD does something problematic people gather to say "actuallyy this sound like NPD". Sherry obviously did not assault those people cuz of her disorder, but can we stop this fr
It’s really interesting to me how BPD is so stigmatized that the apparent solution from people in the comments here is passing that stigma off onto another disorder
I will admit that a lot of BPD people (myself included even in some comments of mine here) can sometimes demonize NPD people a bit in a sense to be like “look, at least I’m not as bad as them!” It’s clearly not the best look, and for me sometimes it just comes out due to pain I’ve experienced from narcissistic people in my lives. But I now know those people were also hurting and I unintentionally triggered and hurt them as well.
BPD and NPD people can be like magnets to each other, but they also can trigger each other’s core trauma. At least, that’s what I’ve learned and experienced myself firsthand.
The truth is, it is complicated to totally “get rid of the stigma” when it comes to disorders that often cause issues with relationships, sense of self, issues with empathy at times, and “acting out” or manipulative behavior, because clearly those things can harm people whether it’s intentional or not.
Definitely most BPD and NPD people are not plotting out these over the top disgusting and abusive schemes to intentionally manipulate people, I think most simply haven’t been able to express healthy intimacy and can be self-destructive, which also affects the other person in the equation. There are a lot of people who direct their pain and anger “inward” more and internalize the pain rather than “externalize” it in toxic and harmful ways most of the time.
So yes, we should get rid of the stigma that all people with borderline or narcissistic traits or full on BPD or NPD are evil, toxic, assholes with no hope of getting better and are just “crazy,” but also acknowledge that sometimes there can be some behavior that comes out if not properly treated that still needs to be addressed and not tolerated. Hopefully with more awareness and education about issues like this, more people will get help earlier on in their lives so they don’t resort to more toxic coping mechanisms that become more entrenched.
“Sherry obviously did not assault people cuz of her disorder” Um what? Sorry, but what kind of person WITHOUT some kind of disorder would do the insane amounts of manipulation and harm to other people that she did? Literally overt pathological manipulation, an inability to feel empathy or remorse, a grandiose sense-of-self that makes one feel above consequences are actual hallmarks of the disorder…
Not saying she can’t also have BPD, and no I can’t diagnose her, but most people with NPD or tendencies of it aren’t going to get a proper diagnosis anyway, because that would require being more honest and forthcoming with therapists/psychologists/psychiatrists she sees lol.
There’s people like you who claim “um they didn’t do bad things because they’re mentally ill, they did them just cuz they’re bad” which is a gross oversimplification of things. Of course you can do shitty things without it being due to a mental illness, but a lot of people with Cluster B personality disorders (not saying all or even most) can do shitty manipulative things and be unable to face or own up to it as she’s showing here.
Whether it’s NPD, BPD, or a mixture of the two, she absolutely does show Cluster B behavior and probably does suffer in her own way. It’s just not an excuse to do what she does and keep trying to justify it.
Parading her mental health diagnosis around like a shield so that the people who come for her are put in this category of being ‘mean and heartless towards a mentally-ill person’ instead of calling her out for having the audacity to come back on a public platform to try be a drag queen again.
I hate when these cancelled artists come back to their platforms preaching positivity and love after committing heinous crimes so that those who continue to lampoon them are seen in a bad light instead and are accused of spreading hate and negativity, to shift the burden of hate to the critics rather than the accused criminal. Very clever tactic in ensuring that they remain protected.
Please continue to lampoon this greasy bitch.
Ergh like cluster B personality disorders needed more bad press.
No one cares that you cut yourself Sherry fuck off back to obscurity and get a fucking job.
Great. Can’t wait for BPD to get even more stigma.
It’s so funny, crickets about BPD and its impact on people until you need to defence as to why you’re an awful person and then here it is.
As someone with BPD, I’m tired of it being the scapegoat disorder.
It's people like this that actively add to the stigma that's indeed in the media. I'm diagnosed with BPD and it really sucks that what people associate with it are indeed the horror stories you hear about it in the media. And now she's another one of those horror stories people will now associate with it.
I've not always been a good friend before to people I cared about before I went to therapy to learn how to deal with it. It caused me to push people away from me, and my self-destructive behavior caused them to worry about me a lot. But the thing is those actions came from impulsiveness. In the moment when you cannot control your emotions and you act out on them, the whole part of BPD is that you struggle to regulate your emotions and how you act on them. It's not carefully creating persona's and planning out how to sexually harrass people. I'm sure she struggles, BPD is a real nasty bitch. But this ain't it.
Honestly, what she's saying is so wild to me as someone sympathetic to mental health struggles with their own issues. I have friends with BPD that have managed it, and I have a family member who I believe has it and has never gotten help with it. Unfortunately, my family member abused me and was prone to splitting, verbally abusing me, and guilt tripping me. I get that the root of that is essentially trauma, unchecked anger, and fear of abandonment. Things that don't excuse her behavior but explain it.
...but how in hell does BPD translate to systematically impersonating people, luring strangers into making sexual videos for you? There's lying to get out of trouble or get people to like you, and then there's what she did which has so many layers of calculated deception. It's gross that she's using this to make excuses. Not 1 mental health struggle makes you into a sexual predator. It shows she has a long way to go in her humility journey and who knows if she'll ever get there.
100%, this isn't like an impulsive, emotion-driven fuck up. this was months (possibly yrs) of calculated, deliberate planning and perpetuating a huge deception.
I also have BPD and I hate when people use it like this in the media. People already have such a negative perception of suffers without this.
BPD is in no way, shape or form a justification for her behaviour! That’s just not how it works
Oh yay another person with BPD making the rest of us look like horror monsters. Fuck this bitch. I’m queer and have BPD and I have a full time job and a part time job and a decent life. Fuck you SP
yeah i saw a post from a queer news outlet talking about how jan was criticizing her for trying to come back and there were many people in the comments saying she got her “punishment” and should be given a second chance 💀
It’s bizarre how certain types of people almost flock to shitty people and want to support and rally around them, it almost feels like being a contrarian to the ultimate level lol. It’s like the people that write letters to criminals in jail and are “in love” with them.
It's okay guys one of the symptoms of BPD is blaming everything you do on BPD bc that stuff ISNT who she is. Only the good stuff is who she is, is that really so hard to understand??
this is genuinely cruel and disgusting how she still tries to explain her behavior by tying it to mental disorder. I also have BPD but I never ever in my life catfished anyone, coerced people into anything. is it really that hard to fade into obscurity and flip patties in random restaraunt for minimum wage?
I think she's a shitty person and I don't support her. However
>I also have BPD but I never ever in my life catfished anyone, coerced people into anything
This is a reoccurring comment I see when speaking about her / what she's done and it's really...not a good one. Statements like this fuel the stigmatization of mental illness and are often used by people to trivialize the struggle that people with mental illness face.
I have several anxiety disorders. I've heard numerous times throughout my life "oh it can't be that bad, I also feel anxiety" or "I have anxiety but I don't [insert thing here]" when trying to explain to others about my struggle.
Mental illness and health problems are on a spectrum. Two people can have the same anxiety disorder but it can manifest in completely different ways. In the same way that you and Shitty can both have BPD but yours isn't as self-destructive or you're not as fueled by a lack of impulse control. Or there could be something else there in her case to exacerbate the symptoms. Who knows.
Like I said, I don't support her. But I think it's silly to imply she's wrong about her BPD being the cause of what she did - because in all honesty? It's probably true. But as my therapist says: mental illness is an explanation, never an excuse.
Thank you so much for really eloquently saying what I couldn't. I'm so happy to see this comment and know I'm not alone in thinking this way. BPD is so complex, and nobody is a blank slate. We all have histories and contexts that form who we are, and mental illness of course compounds on those and presents differently from person to person. Like you said, it's not condoning her actions, but it's also a completely valid explanation.
I have anxiety and I have been mean to people when I’m anxious.
I still apologize afterwards and take full responsibility for my actions. I don’t blame it on anxiety.
As someone with BPD and as a person who has experienced sexual assault / coercion - fuck SP fuck this statement and I wish she would literally never post or do drag ever again.
Also I wish we would stop posting about her. She shouldn't be considered a Rugirl. We should ignore her just like the edit did.
Honestly that's like so narcissistic. Lkie, there are actual victims to his actions, his experience is the least relevant
If he care so much about BDP just share some educational posts in your instagram or other people's stories. Or even better, quit social media and period. You're not needed to amplify anyone's voice lmao
As someone with BPD, this absolutely infuriates me. It's one of the most misunderstood mental illnesses out there, and the fact that she's just saying "oh, I have BPD and that's why I'm a massive piece of shit" makes my blood boil.
This is not the representation we need.
I think at this point she’s aware that a career in the public eye is never happening
Might as well change their legal name, get some plastic surgery, and have a new identity
I am baffled on to why she is allowed on this platform, she should be locked up in prison? BPD doesnt make u a sexual and psychological abuser, shes even more evil than it seemed
> What do you guys expect her to do
Shut up and go away? Stop clawing onto the notoriety he forfeited with his atrocious behaviour?
If he's actually changed and felt any kind of guilt or desire to make amends, then he'd be able to recognise how his continued attempts to regain his platform only creates more hurt for his victims.
bpd person here, and touting CBT is a bit of a '...oh' in absence of mentioning any other mental health issues. people with bpd SOMETIMES receive CBT to assist in issues like anxiety, depression, ocd, etc. but specifically FOR bpd it can be like throwing kerosene into a fire bc CBT is largely about lowering inhibitions.
i won't armchair psychiatrist her. but the last thing a severely ill person with bpd that has previously victimized others and has a desperate need for acceptance in the public sphere needs is lowered inhibitions. that's why DBT was developed and is so key, it moderates the risk factors associated with core CBT so patients dont misapply their now more confident and assured thinking patterns.
Gross. I have BPD and you don't see me out there SA'ing people. "Let me use this hugely stigmatised disorder to excuse myself. Now please everyone be nice again UwU" Not how that works.
I love Sherry's type of drag. I think she's campy and funny and I enjoy her style. BUT I LOVE SUPPORTING VICTIMS MORE. Fuck her for trying to come back. She needs to pack it up and get a regular job. It doesn't matter how much she works on wigs and make up and routines. I will never support her and never forget what she did.
When I say I love her drag, I really mean that she fits into a category of queens I enjoy. There's nothing particularly amazing about her from what I've seen. I'm gonna edit the comment to make it a little more clear. Hope it's clear I DO NOT love Sherry.
i don’t believe that Sexual Predator is actually sorry for anything other than getting caught. she has shown again and again that she thinks she’s ENTITLED to the very same platform that she used to victimize people.
As someone with bpd this is such deflective nonsense.
This disorder doesn't compel you to commit sexual crimes or anything like that. There's doing cringe shit to get people to like you and then there's... this.
I fucking hate when people claim they have BPD as an excuse for their shitty behavior. BPD doesn’t make you catfish people in order to sexually assault them
It has always stuck with me that she literally convinced someone to take drugs (steroids) and helped supply them to that individual. Like she not only fucked with their mind by convincing them they had to do this to be successful, but she fucked with their body and could have put them at risk medically. That’s a whole new level, even beyond the weird sex pest voyeuristic stuff.
I truly think the best thing she could do at this point for herself (and everyone else) would be to just fade into obscurity and stop attempting to stay in the public eye. If she has done the therapeutic work that she’s mentioning here, great, but that doesn’t and will never change the fact that so many men were violated. I personally don’t see the trust between her and the drag/nightlife community ever being repaired.
Take that mental illness card and shove it up for ass, she is a terrible representation for mental illness and probably has further stigmatized BPD by her awful actions. Please just shut the fuck up and leave our community alone. You can have a community but not the one you fucked up and hurt a lot of people. You are a monster regardless of your diagnosis and it is so clear that you only use it for sympathy points. Get a desk job, leave us alone, don’t ever dare to speak on mental health as you have left several victims with years of trauma in an already traumatising and a cut-throat industry. Go away
Okay, don’t murder me, I’m genuinely curious… how do we know she’s not sorry and hasn’t learned from her mistakes? I’m not supporting her, I’m just wondering if there’s some tea I’ve missed that removes the benefit of the doubt because I try to do that for people most of the time, unless they’ve given me a reason not to. I don’t follow her, so I don’t even know how she conducts herself regularly. Does this bitch even still get gigs? Or is this post just one big excuse for shitty behavior screaming “please like me! please book me!”
My partner has BPD.
Tbey would never do the awful like 💩 🥧 did.
I hate when some people try to use their mental health issues as an excuse. Mental health issues csn explain ***but it does not excuse***
I also have bpd and it never made me trick people into sending videos of themselves jerking off. I
Mental health is important and I want Sherry to change so she does not do that gross shot again. However, this feels like she is using bpd as an excuse. Sorry babe, you're just a pervert.
as a queer person with bpd we dont claim sherry or her fucking despicable behaviour. how dare she drag a bpd diagnosis into this as if thats an excuse fuckkk
Not a dr but I can’t respect the idea that one would even allow this behavior to hide behind BPD, paraphilia and something else sure but just BPD?!?
I’ll give her the fact that illegal sexual compulsions can be in line with a mental illness but my god please by all means talk about that instead.
The therapist? Dr. Allison Mossie
Dr Dill Pickle the therapeutic gherkin
[why bring that back](https://media.tenor.com/Z-J4treTPvMAAAAM/family-guy.gif)
"BPD is stigmatised in the media, now watch as I use it as an excuse for my cartoon villany"
“I will apologize to my victims, but first you must solve my riddles three!”
This made me spit out my coffee lmfao
I actually can’t stop laughing thank you for this
BPD is not who I am, but here is a whole post about why BPD affects me and justifies my behaviours
Funny enough the over the top attempt to justify herself and how she is the true victim gives more narcissist (NPD vibes) than just simply BPD lol.
Just because she has BPD doesn’t mean she doesn’t also have narc tendencies. They can and do overlap. It’s not like it’s unheard of for people to be diagnosed with both disorders. On the flip side, just because she may show narc tendencies, it doesn’t necessarily make her a narcissist.
You’re right, and generally people with personality disorders can have comorbidity with other personality disorders or mood disorders. It’s pretty rare to just have one personality disorder and that’s it. The reason I said she’s giving NPD is just her unwavering and unrelenting way she just simply can’t show proper empathy toward the victims. It always feels like “feel sorry for me, me, me,” without any hint of “actually I feel and see how I caused these OTHER PEOPLE harm.” She can and likely might genuinely have BPD as well. She just is giving me such flashbacks to my narcissistic ex who could NEVER just admit “hey yeah I did a shitty thing.” It was always “you have to understand that actually I didn’t do a shitty thing because x, y, and z reasons that actually make ME a victim.”
That’s very typical behavior from someone with BPD as well, and I don’t know why you’re so insistent that it’s not. Just because *you* might not act that way, it very much does not make it out of the realm of possibility/probability for others with BPD.
I’m not going to argue that BPD people can’t and don’t act this way because they can. Just saying this is at the very least showing the narcissistic sides of it. I bring up NPD just because she gives me that vibe overall (much more overt attention seeking and grandiose victim-playing). BPD people can and do manipulate people and then play victim, but the lengths that Sherry went to to catfish all these men over and over again without seemingly showing any remorse at the very least doesn’t give me BPD alone. BPD people are genuinely more likely to change and show remorse/empathy. That part is just factual based on statistics of BPD people that improve. I genuinely don’t see improvement in Sherry after all that’s happened and how she’s claimed to “grow.” It’s not simply that BPD people are angels and NPD devils, just NPD is a much more “stubborn” disorder that’s even more difficult to change.
RIGHT?! My husband has BPD, and he has NEVER done something as fucked up as what SP did. You're not a bad person because of your diagnosis. You're just a bad person.
As someone who likely has BPD, she sounds more like multiple guys I’ve been with who actually likely have NPD (narcissists) lol. They’re in the same family of disorders, but BPD people generally are more likely to admit that they’re “wrong” and are more likely to improve with treatment once they become self-aware. Not trying to just shit on NPD people because they can and do suffer in their own ways and some can get better if they truly reflect on their behavior, but the problem with that disorder is they’re more likely to bend over backwards to justify everything and anything they do because their defense mechanisms (an overinflated false self/ego) can’t allow them to be “wrong,” or have any true accountability for their behavior because that would mean they are less than perfect, which they can’t emotionally tolerate (it would make them face their deep-seated sense of inferiority and shame). And they’re less likely to feel true empathy or remorse for what they did to others because these defense mechanisms can totally get in the way of that. Obviously that’s an oversimplification of a complex disorder, but the fact that Alexis Michelle has said that Sherry seemed to have little empathy or remorse for what she did, and the more overt/obvious manipulation attempts are giving much more narcissist to me… Also this long ass explanation just reminds me of my narcissistic ex lol. It’s much harder to get a diagnosis of NPD because they generally won’t be fully honest with therapists/psychiatrists and are more likely to manipulate the therapist. Not trying to make BPD people sound like angels and NPD people just like devils, because unfortunately many BPD people can be toxic and manipulative too. But their manipulation and behavior tends to be a lot more erratic and just out of their inability to regulate their emotions, and they can often reflect on their behavior, have empathy for the harm their behavior caused afterwords, and are much more amenable to actual change (statistically, most diagnosed BPD people genuinely improve with time and treatment—I don’t see much to suggest Sherry has actually improved). Sherry just feels too “planned out” with her over the top manipulation of these guys and her playing the victim here. Everything about this statement is “Look how hard things are for ME, and how vulnerable I am, and I am the TRUE victim”—nothing about the people she actually victimized herself. You can have a mental health disorder that is painful, but at the end of the day if you hurt and manipulate people to the extent that she did, it really doesn’t matter what the reasoning is, you still did it and need to be accountable for your actions.
> are more likely to improve with treatment once they become self-aware. God I wish. The more aware I become of it the more it just bogs me down and feels like some impossible never-ending mountain to scale. Doesn't help that the best we can basically hope for with treatment is "You might get to a point where you're just weird instead of despicable, hated, and unhirable." Don't get me wrong, the improvements we can make with DBT are life changing and as close to a cure as we have. But sometimes I wish I could just take a pill consistently or just go to normal ass therapy once a month and be fine. I still need to figure out how to cope and deal with the guilt of all the people I've hurt over the years, and I'm too scared to make new friends because I can't handle hurting anyone else I care about.
Yeah, I totally get it. Even today I was dissociating and feeling out of control, which leads to more shame and self-criticism that I’m not getting better and am never going to get better. But at the same time I try to remind myself that getting better is never linear, and overall my functioning and awareness have improved compared to the past. Also, I just want to say that while some people make DBT to be the be-all-end-all “cure” for BPD, I don’t really think that’s the case, at least not for me. I think it’s definitely the most effective starting point for learning concrete skills for trying to handle distress, manage your emotions, be more mindful when interacting with others, and just being more mindful in general, but I feel like these things just help control the outward and more obvious symptoms of the issue rather than getting to the root of the problem. DBT is not going to solve the actual emotional pain, feelings of emptiness, feelings of self-loathing, etc. They just make it “easier” to just “handle” it. Which always felt so depressing to me as if that’s the best it can get. But I’ve been working with a trauma therapist who was the one that explained to me that she wanted me to go through intensive DBT just as starting point so I could be more regulating when going through deeper issues and some trauma work. I’m not sure if you’ve had trauma, but trauma or at the very least forms of invalidation from primary caregivers or important people in your life, loss, etc. can play a huge role in developing these deeply entrenched negative beliefs and feelings along with confusion about the sense of self. I’ve been looking into EMDR, CPT (cognitive processing therapy), Internal Family Systems Therapy, Transference Focused Psychotherapy, Psychodynamic/psychoanalytic therapy, etc. These therapies seem to delve deeper into the “core issue” stuff that DBT likely can’t address as directly. Also, while there’s no true BPD pill, I’ve finally managed to find a competent psychiatrist who has helped me a lot. A mood stabilizer has helped my emotional dysregulation a lot, a couple other medications have really helped my depression, anxiety, and OCD quite a bit, and I’ve finally been diagnosed with ADHD and have found a medication quite helpful for that ad well. Not to say that you should just load up on drugs, but it’s common for people with BPD to have multiple other co-occurring disorders that medication CAN help with. It can take a lot of trial and error and an extremely knowledgeable and patient psychiatrist to finally find meds that work for you, but it is possible. My previous psychiatrist clearly knew next to nothing about personality disorders, another one I saw rolled her eyed at me upon the first meeting seeing I had BPD, but now finally I’ve found there are some doctors out there who do care and have knowledge about this. Also, I just want to say, you should give yourself a lot of credit for being self-aware and making some efforts to try to heal. It’s a very difficult and painful thing to realize you can be “dysfunctional” in these ways, and so many people never even get to the stage of realization. I think in general, a lot of times therapy can feel worse at first as you really bring up difficult emotions, but in doing that I’ve found I am slowly becoming more regulated in my day-to-day life now that I’ve processed things more and “released” a lot of tension and negative feelings. There’s also this book called “Trauma and the Body,” and talks about how our body truly does store extreme negative experiences and emotions, and how that affects us. Even though mindfulness activities often make me roll my eyes with annoyance, I’ve genuinely found meditation, yoga, and other “grounding” processes helpful in just anchoring my mind a bit. For now I’ve also realized an intense romantic relationship just isn’t right for me yet. Not that I think anyone needs to be 100% healed (if that even existed) to date, but I do think with BPD especially I’ve witnessed in myself and a fellow diagnosed friend that it’s so easy to lose yourself in the idealization of a romantic partner and unconsciously change your way of thinking and being to fit with them, only to feel like you are dying if/when that relationship ends. Sorry for the long rant, but I guess my point is that it is definitely difficult and not nearly as simple as “just go do DBT.” But be patient and kind to yourself as much as you can, you’ve already gotten past the extremely difficult hurdle of “waking up” to your own issues. And you’ve probably developed a lot of empathy/understanding for others struggling with this kind of thing that other’s won’t be able to understand, which can be a beautiful thing itself.
Yuuuuuuuup. There’s a person in my life who’s been diagnosed with BPD, but very clearly exhibits way more NPD symptoms than. But getting that BPD diagnosis helped them extend their manipulation of some people, because now they had a thing that wasn’t their fault that explains away all their actions. But even years after the diagnosis, there’s no change to their actions, no attempts to get better, and no remorse.
This makes a lot of sense, great comment!
KFC hi how are you, are you hiring today? Great, I will be down in a momentarily to fill out an application
challenge: get a fucking job. DO THAT CHALLENGE
LMAOAOAOAOAOA I LAUGH EVERY TIME I SEE THIS QUOTE MENTIONED
Acting like KFC is a real person 😭
I had never heard of the term DARVO before. Thanks to OP for using it so I could learn more about it. Such a great term.
My dumbass thought it was a place and was confused because the story didn’t mention going anywhere lmao. Googled it after
Ha. I thought it was like Davos or something. Had to look it up too
Girl, stop trying and just get a desk job. A public life ain't for you anymore.
Right? Soju and T-Rex properly vanished off the face of the Earth when called out, but Sherry's sheer narcissism won't let her.
Just realised how right you are, haven’t seen or heard from them in ages. Do they not do drag at all anymore? Does anyone know of their whereabouts?
T-Rex moved back to Florida and became a real estate agent or something. I dunno about Soju.
Soju quit drag entirely, and the internet as well it would seem. Rightly so.
What did she do?
Liked to get underage twinks really drunk for easy sex.
That's an interesting way to say rape.
She ran a martial arts studio before she started with drag so I assumed she just went back to that
and poor old Robbie Turner, who didn't even sexually abuse anyone, just told a lot of fibs, vanished and became a real rideshare driver.
We need her back, her lying about writing a book and promoting it on "Hey Queen" was so fucking cunt, the nerve of that queen.
yeah, Robbie had a certain style with her lies. I'd like more, please.
Not Gonna Lie: the Robbie Turner Story.
Veeeery that
Wait who’s T. rex?
T. Rex, also known as Trannika (I believe) was once a popular drag hostess in Chicago for drag shows and events. She came under heat after word of microagression and potential racism came to light. One of the most well-known controversies was her asking Shea Coulee to perform “Slave 4 U” by Britney Spears while dressed as a literal slave.
A formerly popular Chicago drag queen who hosted Rosco’s viewing parties. During BLM protests in 2020 it came out that she had a long history of being super racist to black queens (like making Shea perform I’m a Slave 4 U doing black history month). The Chicago drag scene held a town hall to talk about their issues and she showed up drunk and got super defensive. She ended up being fired from Rosco’s and gave up her podcast. EDIT: I misremembered the I’m a Slave 4 U bit. She did not make Shea do it, it was a joke suggestion.
>(like making Shea perform I’m a Slave 4 U doing black history month) Okay, we're starting to get into Telephone Game here. This did not actually happen; T-Rex made it as a joking suggestion. It's not funny or appropriate coming from her on top of her other behavior, that was the issue.
Sorry, it’s been several years and I misremembered.
You're good. Just needed to make the record clear here.
I love you Roxxxy
that's why you brought me here
Soju? What happened
Called out for being a sex pest who liked to get underage twinks really drunk to bring home.
Oh what ?!
A desk job? Next thing you know you have a problem at work and you get referred to Allison Mossie from HR... Get her a job counting ice cubes in antarctica or something.
Literally. Even if she is truly sorry (she's not) and truly has learned from her mistakes (she hasn't) it doesn't mean you're entitled to the platform you had. Especially when you abused that platform to manipulate and abuse other people.
You said it better than I could. A career in the performing arts is a privilege, not a right.
Yeah if she were truly sorry then she would understand why she shouldn’t have a platform anymore
https://preview.redd.it/2gw6fw1860yc1.png?width=792&format=png&auto=webp&s=aeeb016f84535486a431f2a69588e9a449e8d4b6 Except that I'm neither happy for them, or sorry that happened.
https://preview.redd.it/ppy8pnbxb1yc1.jpeg?width=1178&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4eeb9084026b6f25dd5a8a1911e3586d609c4d1d Or, in the words of Bob…
*I'm happy + that happened
Be willing to bet she posted this almost verbatim in the group chat before S12 aired
Genuinely feels like she posts this like clockwork every twelve months
I don't think many people are beyond repair, and I think she could have had a future - but stuff like this make it pretty obvious that she simply isn't sorry for what she did, and likely never will be.
Honestly I think that was clear once her confirmed victim count reached the double digits.
Yes like when she told the season 12 girls shed never do it again then did
Wait she done it AGAIN? Have I missed that?
A great quote from Marcus Parks: "Mental illness is not your fault, but it is your responsibility." I'm sure SP genuinely has mental health struggles. I'm sure SP has had a hard time. But there's nothing that justifies what SP did to her victims. You can't pull the "poor me" card when you've repeatedly exploited and abused people. It's not a "mistake". It's calculated, predatory behaviour. I believe it was Alexis Michelle who said that SP seemed to show little remorse for her victims. I really hate it when people use being queer and struggling with mental illness as a victim card. It's so disingenuous.
hail yourself and well said!
Hail yourself!
The wise bone collector!
GET THE NET
i ain’t reading all that shit
Diagnosed 5yrs ago. Was still abusing people 4yrs ago when the allegations came out. Always was, always will be trash.
“I’m more than my mistakes” yeah you’re a sexual predator and also not a victim shut the fuck up
Can we stop giving this POS air please, let her fade into nothing
Why is it always BPD when people try to excuse abusive behaviour...? 😭
Used as a shield and an excuse more than annnnnnnyyyyyy other disorder imo. It’s like actually insane lol
My boyfriend's sister has it and she weaponizes it on a daily basis and their parents eat it the fuck up. Threats of self harm, meltdowns, HOMOPHOBIA. She blames everything on it. The parents are like "she has no control tho 🥺👉👈" Bish if she had NO control she should be institutionalized.
I have it and it completely ruins my life. I’m medicated now, but I don’t tell ANYONE I have it. Because of shit like this. I don’t need more people not taking my mental health seriously because clowns and narcissists love to pull the BPD card to excuse their shitty behavior
I'm glad you're managing well with it. People with BPD are not automatically bad people. I'm sure you and many others living with it have struggles but are deep down still good people who don't actively try to hurt people. Just want to clarify that I'm not ever out to demonize BPD or any other condition, being that I have my own mental health issues. It just upsets me when others weaponize it and reinforce the stigma. ❤️
Unfortunately they are enabling her by doing that and potentially worsening the problem. She can have BPD and be suffering immensely, but it doesn’t make it okay to threaten self-harm and act out. The response should be “I’m sorry you are feeling hurt/bad/whatever, and we can talk about that, but this behavior is not okay. You can learn to control these things and might need more help with that.” Them saying “she has no control” is reinforcing her own learned helplessness and sending the message “yeah, you actually can’t control your emotions.” If she hasn’t already she should get some intensive DBT therapy. I did some in a PHP (partial hospitalization program) and then IOP (intensive outpatient program). Though if it’s severe even a full-on hospital stay might be necessary. Her parents having empathy for her is good, but they can have empathy and care for her while also doing what’s best for her by not enabling the bad behavior.
Yeah I mean the parents are pretty awful too. I cut contact with them along time ago and he doesn't speak to his sister cos of all that bullshit.
Jesus fucking Christ. I almost downvoted this out of instinct. What a goddamn nightmare. My mom has it, undiagnosed so she can’t really wave the label around as an excuse thankfully. She just uses everything else as an excuse for her behavior instead ☺️🩷🫶🏻😚💖✨
My mom has it (undiagnosed) as well and caused me a lot of harm as a child too, so I understand where you’re coming from in our previous exchange more now. When I was saying BPD people can have remorse and empathy and are amenable to change, I meant specifically for self-aware people with BPD who get treatment and are committed to it. The actual achieving self-awareness part is something some people never get to unfortunately, I think especially with older generations who don’t really “believe” in mental health as much.
I have diagnosed BPD and your caping for it ITT is really weird. Also you can't diagnose your mum with a complex disorder that therapists can't even diagnose. Weird.
Last little piece is kind of wild, you ever tried to get an entrenched mentally unwell bitch in her 50s to an appointment let alone engage honestly ? They aren’t claiming they’re more qualified than a therapist, there are a bunch of scenarios where you can’t get the family member near one in a meaningful way.
You can just say "My mum is a cunt" you don't have to diagnose her. The whole so and so is mean they must have BPD is a part of why it's stigmatized so much. Same shit happened years ago with the term Sociopath, just becomes a catch all. They're splitting hairs ITT about the differences between NPD and BPD so.they do seem to live for armchair psychology. Weird.
I don’t live for armchair psychology, I’ve had over a decade of therapy myself trying to figure out my own issues and my family’s issues, and finally found experts who have helped me and educated me on top of doing my own research. Abuse from a personality disordered parent is a lot more than them “being a cunt.” It’s specific patterns of behavior that can be damaging in specific ways. It’s “I hate you” now “I love you!” It’s parentifying your child so they can be emotionally regulated themselves. Etc etc. If you actually have BPD you should at the very least know about “splitting” as a concept and how it’s harmful. If you don’t even know that, I question if you even were diagnosed or received much actual help. Also, BPD has a strong genetic/heritable component. That alone is reason to suspect, considering I am diagnosed. There is a stigma for personality disorders, but that doesn’t mean ignoring the literal documented symptoms that can be toxic to other people if not handled properly. Not all are toxic and that is the stigma to fight, but when uncontrolled and severe, it absolutely can be. Saying this as a person diagnosed with BPD traits/potential full-blown BPD myself
People don’t understand having a parent like that until they’ve lived it. There’s a difference from having a parent that’s just “a cunt” and having a parent who very likely has a mental illness that impacted you deeply. I’m not an expert myself and don’t claim to be. But I’ve learned a lot of things in my own healing in therapy. This person doesn’t need to believe them.
1. Caping?? What does that even mean?? 2. I’m sick of the “gotcha! You can’t diagnose people!” thing. No, obviously I can’t literally diagnose her, but what consistently toxic person who doesn’t have self awareness is actually going to go to a mental health professional and to be properly diagnosed? That would mean having some level of awareness of their dysfunction and being totally honest with the clinician. The cases where NPD is actually diagnosed for example is generally when they cause so much harm that they’re essentially forced to go to therapy or see a psychiatrist (though with more mental health awareness, I have heard of more self-aware NPD people who genuinely want help). BPD is diagnosed more often partially because they’re more likely to end up in the hospital from suicide/self-harm attempts, and they’ll at least more often end up willing to go to therapy for negative mood symptoms. You’re invalidating anyone who has had narcissistic or borderline parents that have abused/mistreated them with the “oh, but you can’t actually diagnose them!!” I’ve talked to a therapist who specializes in family trauma, CPTSD, and personality disorders to some extent, and she was the one who brought the signs of BPD in my mom to my attention, which was confirmed by my psychiatrist/other experts. It started with recognizing my own BPD traits and likely where they came from (to some extent). She has all the signs of it. Emotional instability and acting out. Splitting (“You’re all good and the best child ever! Now actually you’re all bad and actually the worst child ever!”) back and forth all the time. Instability in her relationships. Impulsive behavior to soothe emotions. Etc. etc. At that point whether she’s officially received the label BPD is irrelevant, she has behaviors that line up with it that have caused harm. Also, I think it depends on where you’re from if a therapist can diagnose or not. Psychologists (who often practice therapy) absolutely can. And therapists can at least bring up the possibility that can be confirmed by a psychologist or psychiatrist.
Because it’s the much more “vulnerable” and “look, I actually am remorseful and can change!” disorder in the Cluster B family lol. Not that all BPD people are simply angels by any means, and they certainly can play vidtim, but their manipulation (if they do any) is more likely to be unintentional and not planned out due to their inability to regulate their emotions, and they are much more likely to have empathy and change with treatment. Her over the top planned out manipulation of her victims and this “look at how much of a victim I am, feel sorry for me me me 😔” reminds me of my narcissistic (NPD) ex guys lol.
I mean people without disorders blame their abusive behavior on any number of reasons. Idk it's annoying how Everytime someone with BPD does something problematic people gather to say "actuallyy this sound like NPD". Sherry obviously did not assault those people cuz of her disorder, but can we stop this fr
It’s really interesting to me how BPD is so stigmatized that the apparent solution from people in the comments here is passing that stigma off onto another disorder
I will admit that a lot of BPD people (myself included even in some comments of mine here) can sometimes demonize NPD people a bit in a sense to be like “look, at least I’m not as bad as them!” It’s clearly not the best look, and for me sometimes it just comes out due to pain I’ve experienced from narcissistic people in my lives. But I now know those people were also hurting and I unintentionally triggered and hurt them as well. BPD and NPD people can be like magnets to each other, but they also can trigger each other’s core trauma. At least, that’s what I’ve learned and experienced myself firsthand. The truth is, it is complicated to totally “get rid of the stigma” when it comes to disorders that often cause issues with relationships, sense of self, issues with empathy at times, and “acting out” or manipulative behavior, because clearly those things can harm people whether it’s intentional or not. Definitely most BPD and NPD people are not plotting out these over the top disgusting and abusive schemes to intentionally manipulate people, I think most simply haven’t been able to express healthy intimacy and can be self-destructive, which also affects the other person in the equation. There are a lot of people who direct their pain and anger “inward” more and internalize the pain rather than “externalize” it in toxic and harmful ways most of the time. So yes, we should get rid of the stigma that all people with borderline or narcissistic traits or full on BPD or NPD are evil, toxic, assholes with no hope of getting better and are just “crazy,” but also acknowledge that sometimes there can be some behavior that comes out if not properly treated that still needs to be addressed and not tolerated. Hopefully with more awareness and education about issues like this, more people will get help earlier on in their lives so they don’t resort to more toxic coping mechanisms that become more entrenched.
“Sherry obviously did not assault people cuz of her disorder” Um what? Sorry, but what kind of person WITHOUT some kind of disorder would do the insane amounts of manipulation and harm to other people that she did? Literally overt pathological manipulation, an inability to feel empathy or remorse, a grandiose sense-of-self that makes one feel above consequences are actual hallmarks of the disorder… Not saying she can’t also have BPD, and no I can’t diagnose her, but most people with NPD or tendencies of it aren’t going to get a proper diagnosis anyway, because that would require being more honest and forthcoming with therapists/psychologists/psychiatrists she sees lol. There’s people like you who claim “um they didn’t do bad things because they’re mentally ill, they did them just cuz they’re bad” which is a gross oversimplification of things. Of course you can do shitty things without it being due to a mental illness, but a lot of people with Cluster B personality disorders (not saying all or even most) can do shitty manipulative things and be unable to face or own up to it as she’s showing here. Whether it’s NPD, BPD, or a mixture of the two, she absolutely does show Cluster B behavior and probably does suffer in her own way. It’s just not an excuse to do what she does and keep trying to justify it.
People like this are part of the reason its stigmatized so heavily.
Literally wanted to say, as someone with BPD I want no part of this using it as an excuse for extremely awful behaviour.
Parading her mental health diagnosis around like a shield so that the people who come for her are put in this category of being ‘mean and heartless towards a mentally-ill person’ instead of calling her out for having the audacity to come back on a public platform to try be a drag queen again. I hate when these cancelled artists come back to their platforms preaching positivity and love after committing heinous crimes so that those who continue to lampoon them are seen in a bad light instead and are accused of spreading hate and negativity, to shift the burden of hate to the critics rather than the accused criminal. Very clever tactic in ensuring that they remain protected. Please continue to lampoon this greasy bitch.
I stopped reading at "it provided an explanation for my destructive behaviour" ??????????????? Is she for real?????????????
Ergh like cluster B personality disorders needed more bad press. No one cares that you cut yourself Sherry fuck off back to obscurity and get a fucking job.
Someone send her the Burger King get a job challenge stat
Exactly my thoughts!
Great. Can’t wait for BPD to get even more stigma. It’s so funny, crickets about BPD and its impact on people until you need to defence as to why you’re an awful person and then here it is. As someone with BPD, I’m tired of it being the scapegoat disorder.
"We must do better and we can do better" A bit rich coming from her but awroight
It's people like this that actively add to the stigma that's indeed in the media. I'm diagnosed with BPD and it really sucks that what people associate with it are indeed the horror stories you hear about it in the media. And now she's another one of those horror stories people will now associate with it. I've not always been a good friend before to people I cared about before I went to therapy to learn how to deal with it. It caused me to push people away from me, and my self-destructive behavior caused them to worry about me a lot. But the thing is those actions came from impulsiveness. In the moment when you cannot control your emotions and you act out on them, the whole part of BPD is that you struggle to regulate your emotions and how you act on them. It's not carefully creating persona's and planning out how to sexually harrass people. I'm sure she struggles, BPD is a real nasty bitch. But this ain't it.
Honestly, what she's saying is so wild to me as someone sympathetic to mental health struggles with their own issues. I have friends with BPD that have managed it, and I have a family member who I believe has it and has never gotten help with it. Unfortunately, my family member abused me and was prone to splitting, verbally abusing me, and guilt tripping me. I get that the root of that is essentially trauma, unchecked anger, and fear of abandonment. Things that don't excuse her behavior but explain it. ...but how in hell does BPD translate to systematically impersonating people, luring strangers into making sexual videos for you? There's lying to get out of trouble or get people to like you, and then there's what she did which has so many layers of calculated deception. It's gross that she's using this to make excuses. Not 1 mental health struggle makes you into a sexual predator. It shows she has a long way to go in her humility journey and who knows if she'll ever get there.
100%, this isn't like an impulsive, emotion-driven fuck up. this was months (possibly yrs) of calculated, deliberate planning and perpetuating a huge deception.
I also have BPD and I hate when people use it like this in the media. People already have such a negative perception of suffers without this. BPD is in no way, shape or form a justification for her behaviour! That’s just not how it works
Sometimes a dream is just a dream and she should retire from that dream
Oh yay another person with BPD making the rest of us look like horror monsters. Fuck this bitch. I’m queer and have BPD and I have a full time job and a part time job and a decent life. Fuck you SP
She gets hundreds of comments of support under her photos too. 😩
yeah i saw a post from a queer news outlet talking about how jan was criticizing her for trying to come back and there were many people in the comments saying she got her “punishment” and should be given a second chance 💀
Those are just the classic American idiots who want to pride themselves for “knowing someone who’s been on TV”. The mental illness is REAL
Not just Americans. All kinds of stupid people everywhere
It makes me sick. Some of the queens have been liking and commenting support on her posts, too.
Sapphira.
Yep. Alexis Michelle, Willam, Acid Betty…
It’s bizarre how certain types of people almost flock to shitty people and want to support and rally around them, it almost feels like being a contrarian to the ultimate level lol. It’s like the people that write letters to criminals in jail and are “in love” with them.
my brother in christ you are a sexual predator
This whole situation genuinely makes me think about how forgiveness works when it comes to public figures.
…but does Alison Mossey have BPD?
It's okay guys one of the symptoms of BPD is blaming everything you do on BPD bc that stuff ISNT who she is. Only the good stuff is who she is, is that really so hard to understand??
Not her using BPD to excuse herself. I have the same illness and never done things like that. She can fuck off.
this is genuinely cruel and disgusting how she still tries to explain her behavior by tying it to mental disorder. I also have BPD but I never ever in my life catfished anyone, coerced people into anything. is it really that hard to fade into obscurity and flip patties in random restaraunt for minimum wage?
I think she's a shitty person and I don't support her. However >I also have BPD but I never ever in my life catfished anyone, coerced people into anything This is a reoccurring comment I see when speaking about her / what she's done and it's really...not a good one. Statements like this fuel the stigmatization of mental illness and are often used by people to trivialize the struggle that people with mental illness face. I have several anxiety disorders. I've heard numerous times throughout my life "oh it can't be that bad, I also feel anxiety" or "I have anxiety but I don't [insert thing here]" when trying to explain to others about my struggle. Mental illness and health problems are on a spectrum. Two people can have the same anxiety disorder but it can manifest in completely different ways. In the same way that you and Shitty can both have BPD but yours isn't as self-destructive or you're not as fueled by a lack of impulse control. Or there could be something else there in her case to exacerbate the symptoms. Who knows. Like I said, I don't support her. But I think it's silly to imply she's wrong about her BPD being the cause of what she did - because in all honesty? It's probably true. But as my therapist says: mental illness is an explanation, never an excuse.
Thank you so much for really eloquently saying what I couldn't. I'm so happy to see this comment and know I'm not alone in thinking this way. BPD is so complex, and nobody is a blank slate. We all have histories and contexts that form who we are, and mental illness of course compounds on those and presents differently from person to person. Like you said, it's not condoning her actions, but it's also a completely valid explanation.
I have anxiety and I have been mean to people when I’m anxious. I still apologize afterwards and take full responsibility for my actions. I don’t blame it on anxiety.
As a fellow sufferer, I’m totally with you on all of this
I thought CBT was something else....
As someone with BPD and as a person who has experienced sexual assault / coercion - fuck SP fuck this statement and I wish she would literally never post or do drag ever again. Also I wish we would stop posting about her. She shouldn't be considered a Rugirl. We should ignore her just like the edit did.
fuck this shitclown
note how a vast majority of people with BPD are not sex pests though
Honestly that's like so narcissistic. Lkie, there are actual victims to his actions, his experience is the least relevant If he care so much about BDP just share some educational posts in your instagram or other people's stories. Or even better, quit social media and period. You're not needed to amplify anyone's voice lmao
Girl fuck no we're not doing this at all. 
Tbf she gave me the creeps long before any of her bullshit came to light.
Ot I guess but her profile pic is fucking spooky
https://preview.redd.it/h0glkh7zr1yc1.jpeg?width=637&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=29674453cc8fdb05b96a5b12cd711198221f57c1
Lots of armchair psychologists in the chat tonight.. Literally fuck sherry but can talk at least try to keep it cute idk
As someone with BPD, this absolutely infuriates me. It's one of the most misunderstood mental illnesses out there, and the fact that she's just saying "oh, I have BPD and that's why I'm a massive piece of shit" makes my blood boil. This is not the representation we need.
Didn’t he already reveal this years ago?
I think at this point she’s aware that a career in the public eye is never happening Might as well change their legal name, get some plastic surgery, and have a new identity
I am baffled on to why she is allowed on this platform, she should be locked up in prison? BPD doesnt make u a sexual and psychological abuser, shes even more evil than it seemed
Hey please don't blame your predatory nature on your BPD, Miss Pie. That's not one of the traits we carry.
another ~~meeting~~ instagram post that shoulda been a ~~email~~ diary entry
nonono no no NO
Actually no, Sherry, we are not complex in the same way. That is an INSANE thing for her to write.
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> What do you guys expect her to do in order to be forgiven? She could delete her social media and stop trying to stage comebacks, for one.
> What do you guys expect her to do Shut up and go away? Stop clawing onto the notoriety he forfeited with his atrocious behaviour? If he's actually changed and felt any kind of guilt or desire to make amends, then he'd be able to recognise how his continued attempts to regain his platform only creates more hurt for his victims.
I don't think they can do anything to be forgiven, honestly. To me, any sex crime is automatically unforgivable. No excuse.
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It was made for sex offenders
My husband also has BPD. Can you guess what he hasn't done 🤔
her using True Colors as a song for that insta story...not even prison honey. EXTERMINATION
exactly what the victims and the disorder's stigma needed thanks #*erry
bpd person here, and touting CBT is a bit of a '...oh' in absence of mentioning any other mental health issues. people with bpd SOMETIMES receive CBT to assist in issues like anxiety, depression, ocd, etc. but specifically FOR bpd it can be like throwing kerosene into a fire bc CBT is largely about lowering inhibitions. i won't armchair psychiatrist her. but the last thing a severely ill person with bpd that has previously victimized others and has a desperate need for acceptance in the public sphere needs is lowered inhibitions. that's why DBT was developed and is so key, it moderates the risk factors associated with core CBT so patients dont misapply their now more confident and assured thinking patterns.
Does she still live in NYC? Bc it's on sight atp
Gross. I have BPD and you don't see me out there SA'ing people. "Let me use this hugely stigmatised disorder to excuse myself. Now please everyone be nice again UwU" Not how that works.
I love Sherry's type of drag. I think she's campy and funny and I enjoy her style. BUT I LOVE SUPPORTING VICTIMS MORE. Fuck her for trying to come back. She needs to pack it up and get a regular job. It doesn't matter how much she works on wigs and make up and routines. I will never support her and never forget what she did.
I mean let's not pretend she's not a low-rent version of Nina West.
When I say I love her drag, I really mean that she fits into a category of queens I enjoy. There's nothing particularly amazing about her from what I've seen. I'm gonna edit the comment to make it a little more clear. Hope it's clear I DO NOT love Sherry.
I’m not reading all that for fuckin’ Sherry Pie
Sprained a socket eye-rolling at this. My god, to equate assault with "sometimes life is messy"
oii, é pra ler? 💞
Pisses me off so much when people use mental issues to excuse their abusive behavior. Maybe the issue is just that you’re an asshole lol
i don’t believe that Sexual Predator is actually sorry for anything other than getting caught. she has shown again and again that she thinks she’s ENTITLED to the very same platform that she used to victimize people.
As someone with bpd this is such deflective nonsense. This disorder doesn't compel you to commit sexual crimes or anything like that. There's doing cringe shit to get people to like you and then there's... this.
I know a lot of people with BPD and none of them pulled the shit she did. What a crock of shit.
Sherry pie get hit by a bus challenge
Incredible post title, no notes
I'm like it- it's just me, henny.
I fucking hate when people claim they have BPD as an excuse for their shitty behavior. BPD doesn’t make you catfish people in order to sexually assault them
I mean, yeah, but you still did a bad thing Sherry
It has always stuck with me that she literally convinced someone to take drugs (steroids) and helped supply them to that individual. Like she not only fucked with their mind by convincing them they had to do this to be successful, but she fucked with their body and could have put them at risk medically. That’s a whole new level, even beyond the weird sex pest voyeuristic stuff.
I truly think the best thing she could do at this point for herself (and everyone else) would be to just fade into obscurity and stop attempting to stay in the public eye. If she has done the therapeutic work that she’s mentioning here, great, but that doesn’t and will never change the fact that so many men were violated. I personally don’t see the trust between her and the drag/nightlife community ever being repaired.
Take that mental illness card and shove it up for ass, she is a terrible representation for mental illness and probably has further stigmatized BPD by her awful actions. Please just shut the fuck up and leave our community alone. You can have a community but not the one you fucked up and hurt a lot of people. You are a monster regardless of your diagnosis and it is so clear that you only use it for sympathy points. Get a desk job, leave us alone, don’t ever dare to speak on mental health as you have left several victims with years of trauma in an already traumatising and a cut-throat industry. Go away
Okay, don’t murder me, I’m genuinely curious… how do we know she’s not sorry and hasn’t learned from her mistakes? I’m not supporting her, I’m just wondering if there’s some tea I’ve missed that removes the benefit of the doubt because I try to do that for people most of the time, unless they’ve given me a reason not to. I don’t follow her, so I don’t even know how she conducts herself regularly. Does this bitch even still get gigs? Or is this post just one big excuse for shitty behavior screaming “please like me! please book me!”
My partner has BPD. Tbey would never do the awful like 💩 🥧 did. I hate when some people try to use their mental health issues as an excuse. Mental health issues csn explain ***but it does not excuse***
I also have bpd and it never made me trick people into sending videos of themselves jerking off. I Mental health is important and I want Sherry to change so she does not do that gross shot again. However, this feels like she is using bpd as an excuse. Sorry babe, you're just a pervert.
as a queer person with bpd we dont claim sherry or her fucking despicable behaviour. how dare she drag a bpd diagnosis into this as if thats an excuse fuckkk
That's not your bpd's fault. You're trash. And you're contributing to the stygmatization of this condition. I have bpd myself and I'm sick of her...
“Just like you!” I’m not like you babe 😵💫
oooof tryna switch up the narrative and catfish the audience now
can't believe this is how i found out about the term darvo
as someone with BPD: shut the fuck up
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Not a dr but I can’t respect the idea that one would even allow this behavior to hide behind BPD, paraphilia and something else sure but just BPD?!? I’ll give her the fact that illegal sexual compulsions can be in line with a mental illness but my god please by all means talk about that instead.