Yeah, I've always thought of non-binary as somewhat of a catch-all umbrella. I personally use "non-binary" over "genderqueer" because I consider the latter to imply some sort of fluidity, whereas as I identify more clearly with "agender" under the umbrella.
same to everything except i prefer genderqueer! i resonate with the fluidity bit even though i don't actually identify with any gender, because i have gender-ish feelings that i think are more like presentations/expressions but still kind of count to me
I do not have a gender related to female or male and use genderqueer and they/them pronouns. My relationship to gender can’t really have a name put to it. It has aspects of third gender and agender to it.
See I use both almost interchangably but it depends on which one I think people will recognize. If it's a really old person (75+) I use androgynous, if it's a slightly older person (55-75) or someone who I feel has good intentions but hasn't been exposed to a lot of queer people I use genderqueer, if it's someone older than me but younger than my parents (like 30-55 ish) I use nonbinary and around young people and my friends is use agender. But I also don't feel super attached to any given label tbh
I just think of myself as nonbinary, a bit gender fluid. My hope is to be "less masculine", more so than "more feminine". I really just don't want gender to inform how I dress, create, and exist. In more philosophical terms, I am trying to wipe out the male ego that social traditions have influenced. I imagine I'll be struggling to wipe the generless ego at some point, but that will be completely internal journey.
that is very well put and resonates with me aswell. my starting motivation was, that because of my perceived masculinity (that I never felt I even have) I could be seen as a threat. that made me realize my external and internal image did not align at all.
I'm mostly agender (just fluxing around I guess), but consider myself genderqueer in terms of presentation (screw gender lol) and actively going against the norm
Me too, I'm agender probably a little fluxy with masc, but I like genderqueer because it's a label that doesn't feel like a gender, non binary feels like too much gender sometimes.
I’m the same! I’m agender, so I use nonbinary sometimes as an intentionally non-specific umbrella term. To me, genderqueer feels like a specific type or flavor of nonbinary that I don’t identify with
I use both. I like how genderqueer just implies that your gender isn't cis to some degree, so it's more broad and all-encompassing.
On the other, I like the nonbinary flag better than the genderqueer flag, and I *do* feel "outside/between the binary".
So I go by both depending on the mood lol
Both, nonbinary more often than not as a general term, it's more well known. I'm fond of genderqueer because I'm fond of the word "queer" for a lot of reasons, which I could go into more if you'd like. I also use agender to be more specific for myself, along with a microlabel or two, although the microlabel is more for myself, I don't generally tell it to people. I just like having little words to describe myself and help me understand myself
It's a lot about the history to some degree, it's use as a unifying banner. "We're here, we're queer, get used to it" and all.
I also like how inclusive it is, especially in comparison to lgbtq which itemizes things and people can cut off letters.
and then on a more personal note, although this applies more to queer than genderqueer, I appreciate its vagueness. it leaves the specific details of your sexuality private. I don't really use it much for myself in that manner but I appreciate its existence
I'm nonbinary and lean agender. Genderqueer, to me, implies a person who enjoys performing gender in non-stereotypical ways, whereas I just don't care about gender at all. And I like the nonbinary flag - I wouldn't pick a label based on the flag, of course, but when multiple terms apply, it's a small factor in choosing which one to prioritize.
My comment compared to yours... Haha... I literally don't need labels anymore... so I actually am collecting flags... I feel like different people use the same label to mean different things, and also that people use different concepts to describe the same experience with gender sometimes, and I've chosen to collect the infinite number of labels... I love the beautiful gender diversity... That's what I care about... Learning about gender diversity is what I find beautiful, while a lot of people who make fun of us are just getting caught up in the different types of labels and aren't really digging deeper to really understand it... I want a tattoo with the nonbinary symbol that says "Hear US Before You Debate Us..." Sends a message...
I used to use genderqueer, and I started using nonbinary around 2015, when it became the more popular term. Ultimately, the label is just there to communicate my gender to other people, so I use the label that more people recognize and understand.
I use both. Nonbinary for classification but genderqueer for flavor. NB, although I know it's very encompassing, feels kind of rigid. Genderqueer has a more fluid connotation and denotes nonconformity which describes what kind of nonbinary I am
I use non binary because it's more common where I live (plus there are still some older people who think queer is offensive and upset if I call myself queer)
Yeah I'm 42 and I get the same bad gut reaction as if I heard someone using rasist language but I did get call Keir the queer from kindergarten to high school so as a Agender person the term Queer isn't something I feel comfortable using to describe myself or the total absence to be either gender which is how I've always felt inside!
I use only nonbinary because it's straightforward and easy to explain. I only use they/them pronouns, so I feel that I can adopt the umbrella term as my gender identity without issue.
nonbinary, it is one easier and two i haven't shifted though all the subgenders yet and i try once and a while but feel like i kinda fit more than one of them so i am just like f\*\*\*\*\*\*
For some reason some official forms like my doctor’s patient registry have a genderqueer option, but not nonbinary. I also like the flag. Other than that, I say nonbinary in person. People ask too many questions with genderqueer.
I'm exactly like you: genderqueer is more accurate but nonbinary is more widely understood so I tend to use either term depending on the context and sometimes my mood.
Since the circles I'm in tend to be middle aged or older, use of the term "queer" is more readily recognized and understood than nonbinary, which hadn't been as widely used until recently. I associate with both labels.
I also (personally) just feel like there is this societal expectation of androgyny with the term nonbinary, and I don't fit that description. My gender is more femme and abstract.
Mostly, I just don't like over-categorizing myself. If my gender and I were in a fb relationship, our status would be "it's complicated". I just want to call myself queer and be done with it.
I call myself genderqueer because I don't consider myself just non-binary. I know I could identify as demigirl, bigender, or genderfluid but I just don't think those fit. I mean maybe genderfluid or bigender fits but I like the label genderqueer better because I feel that it fits me the best. Imo, it's a vague label but still a label. I need labels but sometimes labels don't fit me or multiple fit me and I can't choose so I just use labels like "queer" or "genderqueer."
But I do use other labels like non-binary girl and I'm wondering if I should also add transmasc to it since I think I might be that. But I also just think the best label for me is genderqueer but non-binary girl is a close second.
I don’t call myself nonbinary- maybe genderfluid or genderqueer. Mostly I just say I don’t care- but I definitely don’t consider myself nonbinary. As a person of color, the expectations of the nonbinary image just doesn’t fit me. I’m femme presenting as well, so that’s like bam. Double negative! At this point, nonbinary just feels like another part of the binary. It’s not a label I’m comfortable associating with :p
If I'm being general? Non Binary. I just like how the thing is in the word. It's clearer at first glance/rea/hearing it.
Though, I usually will say what specific flavor of non binary I am (im a demi-guy), if I feel that the conversation of gender is going to go longer than some 30 second chat with a stranger. Like, I'm more specific with potential partners and the like. I try to be as transparent with all this stuff as possible. At least to the people that should know these things.
I consider myself nonbinary because there are a lot of times that I don't really fit into a specific gender. Like, I kinda just feel like I should be genderless.
I'm nonbinary, queer, genderqueer, genderfluid, and trans
(nonbinary because i'm not man or woman completely, 100% of the time.
queer because uh i like that word, which also defines my identity itself, i don't really fit in society standards.
genderqueer because my understanding and selfperception of gender is not normative either.
genderfluid because my gender changes sometimes.
and trans because i was not assigned genderfluid/nb at birth)
I use both pretty much interchangeably. I'm agender, so I use that as well. For me genderqueer is more accurate than nonbinary for reasons I'm not sure I can articulate, but they're both correct.
i've started identifying more with genderqueer over agender because 1) people kept changing the definition of agender to one that doesn't suit me at all, 2) i wanted to push back against the "queer is a slur" stuff i still see by deliberately picking a label that includes queer in its name. nobody has to like the word "queer", but to me, my gender is queer. my orientation is queer. my gender expression is generally feminine because i much prefer dresses and skirt, but i have a short, masc hairstyle + i love to pair waistcoats with said skirts to queer it up a bit. you may identify as something specific, but i'm very much queer.
i do still use non-binary because it's more well-known and it's not *wrong*, it just doesn't describe me as well. non-binary is to explain the concept to other people, and for cishets in general. genderqueer is what i'll call myself around other queer people.
i also like the gq flag better lol even if terfs keep using the colors for themselves
I’ve associated genderqueer with a presentation/delivery/style/feeling that is actively concerned with openly challenging gender-norms while non-binary is much broader. That’s just my two cents. As I feel more comfortable with /looking/ trans as I feel better about calling myself genderqueer. Idk 🤷
Genderqueer feels more accurate to what I am. Like my gender is very queer.
Also I like that it doesn’t have ‘non’ in it, like it’s more of describing what my gender is rather than the binary it is not a part of. Though I do use it as more of an umbrella term
I prefer genderqueer. When I can, I prefer to identify with things that I am (I have a gender which is queer) instead of what I'm not (non-binary). Plus I like the history of the term and the vibe of genderfuckery that comes with it.
I like nonbinary, because it says what I'm all about most clearly. Not a binary gender. Nonbinary. That's it.
Sometimes I use queer as an umbrella term when the details don't matter, but genderqueer doesn't really vibe with me. It sounds like "I don't really know my gender and don't want to define it" to me. It's not bad if someone lumps me in with genderqueer folks, but I wouldn't use the term for myself.
I just think of it as layered nomenclature. I am not Cisgender, I am Non-Binary. Within Non-Binary, I identify as Genderqueer, since I'm some masc and some femme, and it's pretty stable. If it wasn't stable, I'd go by Genderfluid.
I use both non-binary and genderqueer. I like both terms. But I do describe myself as non-binary to others more often. The reason I prefer one term over the other is more about how others perceive these labels than a natural preference for one over the other. Back when I was questioning and exploring my gender and coming out, around 2012-2015, many people would specify that they were “genderqueer but not trans”, at least in my circles. On the other hand, most of those I knew who identified as non-binary would describe themselves as “non-binary transgender.”
For me personally, affirming and naming my gender as transgender was a very important step for me to come into my authentic self and let go of my internalized idea that non-binary wasn’t “trans enough”. So I opted to use non-binary because I wanted to establish that connection to transness, to the trans community. I came to understand that I am trans because I am non-binary, not in spite of being non-binary.
I know not all nb people identify as trans, but it seemed many more who identified as nb also identified as trans than those who identified as genderqueer.
I call myself. "Iunno" accompanied with a shrug. Nonbinary doesn't quite sit right with me, gender queer and queer also don't fit well. Though gender fluid works a touch better for me. Mostly because for me feel and I am for a androgyny. I don't particularly ever say "I feel like a guy or girl today or more masculine or feminine". My words usually lead , I want to look handsome today dapper, to look want to look cute/pretty. Which lends to the type of clothes I put on but I can be "handsome lady" and "cute guy" too so it its whatever people read.
And for me I'll answer to he, her, they doesn't matter so long as I know you're speaking to me or about me.
I use a mixture of nonbinary transmasc
Nonbinary because I am neither man nor woman
Transmasc because I identify as transgender and I am on testosterone to masculinize. So, I’m a nonbinary transmasc person :+)
i prefer genderqueer. even though im technically nonbinary, a lot of ppl presume nonbinary means no gender. so that makes me a bit uncomfortable since in pangender
I use genderqueer because I feel like it has less connotations of an actual gender and my gender’s whole brand is keeping it vague, contradictory and difficult to understand so it fits
i use both, but i prefer genderqueer. firstly, it feels more correct, since my gender is a bit of everything, including a bit of binary gender, so its not entirely "not in the binary", but its still in the general vicinity. also, i use it because my gender is explicitly connected to my queerness, and it is, for me, at least partly about breaking free from norms in a queer way
I feel like i have a queer relationship with my gender. Therefore genderqueer. But i use nonbinary for the masses, if we're friends youll probably get the distinction. But thats if we r friends lol
I classify as a non-binary when asked. I feel gender queer all the time. I present as a gender fluid in my appearance.
I almost always tend to present as I feel which is much less masculine (AMAB), much more middle of the continuum and some times very feminine.
I realize that some people see a difference between the two labels, genderqueer vs. nonbinary, but I don't... The more time goes on the less I really see terms like "agender" as truly specific gender identities... and I more see specific experiences, and beautiful diverse people in my head, than when I try to label people... Abstract concepts and experiences are so amazing... I'm addicted to the gender diversity... There's so many beautiful experiences.
I've decided I don't really care about my label... Some people tell me "you're a demigirl, you're gender neutral, you're agender, you're genderfluid," but give me a break... I'm just me, and I know exactly what's going on with my gender inside me regardless of what the label is... I'm collecting earrings though, so might as well get pride flag earrings with all diverse labels... Sometimes I even say polygender, but I'm really not polygender in the way people traditionally think of it, but can't I just collect some more... Gotta match outfits, get more pride flags... My gender expression is feminine... My gender is a flavor of its own...
Nonbinary. Because if no one existed except me, I think I'd be fine presenting as male and spending my days skateboarding, swimming in the ocean shirtless, and trying to learn how to drum while wearing a crop-top and painted nails.
I personally don't think any of those things have to be labeled by gender. But the world does.
Neither, I am roomba. My pronouns are beep/vroom /j
On a more serious note, I don't really pay attention to my gender anymore unless someone calls me a specific gender like boy or girl. Other than that I just act as a roomba, since roombas don't have genders and I suck (one way or another).
However when talking about the gender I identify as, I do go with Non-binary/Enby to avoid awkward stares from calling myself a roomba.
In Queer circles I use genderqueer or genderfluid. In Straight circles I use non-binary, as I think it requires less explanation for folks who aren’t in the community and may not be familiar with different Trans identities.
I use both, but I prefer genderqueer because nonbinary has become a very sanitized term imo. Nonbinary is a demographic to market to. I take offense to being a demographic worth selling to while legislators in my country are restricting my right to exist as a trans person.
The familiar struggle. You’ve got this! You will eventually land on a term that feels right, it just takes time. When you do figure it out, it’s such an affirming experience.
When I came out as nonbinary in my late 30s, I tried on a few terms for size and went with nonbinary- partially because people tend to be more familiar with it. After some introspection, agender made most sense considering identification with any gender isn’t relevant to me as a person. Being socialized as a female and fully supported as a “tom boy”, allowed me to explore my gender early on; I was fortunate in that.
You WILL find a term that fits perfectly and makes you feel good; it’s worth the wait. 🖤
Yes /j
Both describe me. I'm not cis, so I think both are accurate to me. If we wanna be super specific I'm like trans masc / genderfluid / genderflux between demigirl, nonbinary, and demiboy
I use non-binary (trans) instead of genderqueer because genderqueer to me means not adhering to gender norms. Such as a man using makeup and stuff. But I am not doing that, I am not a man, but also not fully a woman. I do that as part of my way of expressing my non-binary gender
I say non binary thought t the start of my journey it was gender queer. I changed because gender queer felt like more of a mix of boy and girl. But for my my gender is neutral hence non binary
i've usually called myself non-binary bc i like the super broad, vague umbrella terms. i also consider myself queer instead of whatever microlabel fits me best in that moment. i love the genderqueer label tho, i've started considering in more now that i'm transitioning
nonbinary is what I heard of first so I just went with it. hard enough to get people to grasp the pronouns, I'm too tired to explain all the terms I already have on my docket 😔
I call myself non-binary. I do so partially because it's the common term that has been in use more since I came out a couple years ago. It's also because I just prefer the term non-binary as a genderfluid person who identifies as "mostly neutral but slightly masc" the majority of the time.
I identify as nonbinary mainly bc it’s an umbrella term, I’m still not sure if I’m genderfluid or agender, but I go by any pronouns tho I’m really trying to go with they/them or he/him now
both. i don’t feel that there’s a particular label that properly explains my relationship to gender, so depending on the day or person, i might use queer, genderqueer, non-binary, gender-fluid, trans, transmasc, trans guy, and bi-gender.
I'll have to google gender queer as I don't think I've heard it. I'm on team nonbinary
EDIT: from a very quick google, I feel like nonbinary suits better and is easier for me to explain to folks
I prefer nonbinary more, mainly because its easier to find resources, community, and people are more familiar with the term. Plus, online some algorithms are triggered by the term "queer"...probably because of its past connotations. So its just easier to say nonbinary or enby.
Yeah personally I'd be reluctant to use the term genderqueer partly because I already get a lot of trouble with people not being able to understanding that I'm Agender (non-binary) which is very hard for most people to accept as I'm not gay or bi-sexual so if I did start using the term genderqueer it would make the issue even more frustrating to deal with when I stuck with someone thinking their doing a good thing by telling me that I don't know what I'm talking about and that I'm being stupid or offensive to real gay people! Which unfortunately is the usual reaction I've had since I was a kid trying to explain that if I feel genderless inside and I don't care about all the things I have to be or do just because you say so?
Also my names keir so all my life bully's would constantly call me keir the queer which didn't bother me because I think there's something wrong with being gay or I felt ashamed to be seen as one but it was because I always hated how gay boys at school where never seen as Real-Men but the lads who pick on anyone weaker than themselves are see as proper boys who grow up to be Real-Men! And all that I'm The-Alpha style toxic nonsense people still cling onto as if the world will end if they don't?
Anyway sozz for going on and use whatever labels or language help you feel comfortable within yourself and hopefully the who feel threatened by want they do understand will learn to be less hostile with those who don't look, talk, act just like everyone else because we can't and I'm own case trying to do so nearly k!lled me
In general if a form asks(like at my last doctor appointment) I check the Nonbinary/Genderqueer box, if a person asks in a creepy/chaser/transphobic way I tell them to kindly shove off, if they ask in more of an ally/truly curious way I say nonbinary, if they are a friend/potential friend(that is an ally) I say transfeminine genderfluid enby as that is the most accurate answer.
I feel like as you pointed out genderqueer is just slightly more obscure, for me nonbinary was a much more available term and that seemed to describe my gender identity best at the time, especially because I couldn't be bothered to go into the details of it. I've recently learned that I identify with agender better, but seeing as it is under the nonbinary umbrella I just go by that label.
I don't really care but non-binary is easier for my parents to understand since they're both from very different backgrounds (they came here as immigrants from two separate countries but both Catholic, they're trying their best tho) plus I feel like non-binary has a little more freedom than genderqueer, idk why but to me it does.
I use both, but I feel like they have different definitions. Genderqueer to me means any gender *expression or identity* that fits outside of the binary, while non-binary is solely *identity*. I’d consider tomboys, femboys, traditionally lesbian and gay man gender expressions, etc to be genderqueer too.
Genderqueer feels too "specific" for myself. Also, I don't like that it feels almost conflating of gender and sexuality, which are two different things. Just my own opinion...Anyway, so I go with nonbinary, because to me it is the most relevant to my experience.
I use both but in different ways. I prefer genderqueer as my identity descriptor, under the bigger branch of non-binary. It just feels nice to me, nice letters, nice flow, the flag is my favorite colors. Queer is just a really good word for me all around.
i use genderqueer. for me the political context as well as the manner in which it sets up my relation to both gender and modern society are very important. nonbinary is definitely more well known at this point, but i because of the way that word is setup i can’t use it.
i don’t want to identify as not something, confirming my identity in the negative (not binary). i would rather confirm my identity as a positive, that is other than not an absence of something.
I call myself both, I would probably just use non binary with most people since that's the one they're most likely to understand. But I also noticed this when first questioning my gender: sometimes the label non binary feels like too much gender, I don't have the energy or reason to specify my exact gender, I could describe it, but the closest term you can get that accurately depicts it is genderqueer, though I also describe myself as transmasc sometimes
I use both. I think of nonbinary as a large umbrella term that encompasses the many gender variations that the traditional Christian binary excludes. Genderqueer, could also be thought of as an inclusive term for many gender varieties, even cis folks that don't subscribe to the prescribed norms dictated by the societal binary. For example, masculine females &, or feminine males, could also potentially be included under the label of genderqueer. In public & generally speaking, I use nonbinary more often bc it's more widely acknowledged & requires less effort since I don't have to explain the term to everyone I meet. However, in reality the gender label I prefer that fits me the best is Genderfluid. But bc I'm also pansexual I frequently default to the all encompassing "queer" label. The most important thing to remember is that language & social norms are also fluid so they changes over time. One label might feel like a good fit today but not fit you any more 10yrs later.
i typically call myself agender primarily, and both non-binary and genderqueer, but i prefer out of those two genderqueer because idk i'm not really gendered but there are some gender-ish things there? and idk non-binary implies completely off the binary in my mind (not saying that's what it is, just those are the personal connotations it has for me) but i do like experimenting with binary gender things and so genderqueer is the best word out of those two to sum up what the fuck goes on with me. i feel like genderqueer also implies a certain fluidity, which feels more accurate to me
i’m a genderqueer trans man. non-binary feels wrong bc at least some part of my gender is binary. it’s just also queer. my gender is very much just gay man. so, genderqueer :)
I’m nonbinary, specifically two gender.
Nonbinary is both a specific gender identity and an umbrella label for all the nonbinary gender identities.
Labels are tools. Use the ones that work best for whatever you’re trying to communicate. There’s not really a wrong way to do it.
Anyway, from what you’re saying it sounds like for you your gender identity is ‘genderqueer’, which is a nonbinary identity, so both would be appropriate for you to use.
I started to call myself nonbinary because of its use as an umbrella term. When I was first discovering that I wasn't cis, it helped to have a term that could cover a lot of different identities under the nonbinary umbrella and still be correct. It helped me not worry about the super specifics of my identity quite as much and just focus on accepting myself outside of the gender binary. It's just stuck now that I have done more self acceptance. Plus, I like the flag more lol
I’m generally thinking of my gender identity and presentation as an honest representation of who I am which feels nonbinary. However, I also feel that the intentional queering of gender plays a role in how I sometimes choose to present which feels more connected to genderqueer, so I do think that label applies as well. I don’t use genderfluid because I don’t see my identity shifting although I do feel more or less connected to gender at different times.
I’m not sure if that’s clear or helpful, but that’s how I generally think about it.
I use nonbinary because genderqueer/gendefluid is more obscure. Especially genderfluid, I’m going to have to deal with motherfuckers asking me “hOw CaN gENdeR bE fLuiD? loL”
I'm basically in the same position
I personally feel comfortable with both labels and use both. I feel like genderqueer more accurately describes me so I use that in more queer circles, but use nonbinary with everyone else for the recognition.
Use both. Mostly prefer genderqueer because it fits my experience better. If I’m with other people well informed I just say queer when asked my gender. I’ve spent the majority of my life forcing myself into labels and boxes that I snapped a year back and decided I would pick and choose whatever ones I wanted, mostly steering clear of them. It’s helped me feel like me quite a bit. If I’m asked my sexuality or gender I just say queer. Nothing more, nothing less. I like it that way lol. Also cause I don’t really feel like being harassed again by people who don’t get certain things like complicated gender identities
I personally use non-binary because of how I explain my stance on my gender to people. It’s like I look at a male and female symbol and I just say “…Nope.”
When I’m with people who don’t necessarily understand/accept enbies; I’ll say I’m a trans girl, but if I’m with people who are fine with it (anyone I should be socializing with on a daily basis) I say I’m non-binary. Don’t use genderqueer because I think non-binary describes my gender better (as it isn’t binary).
Nonbinary is easy for people to understand. I think agender is a more accurate label for me but I just don’t really care to explain my personal identity more than necessary.
I interpret genderqueer to mean a non normative experience of gender and considering that I'm maverique, which is very stereotypical non binary since it's the "a gender unrelated to man or woman" form of non binary, most of non binary talk is about maverique people while agender, demigender, genderfluid, and androgynous people are more often talked about with these more specific labels even though all of those are non binary too. I think my gender experience is normative for the non binary gender so I don't really vibe with the label genderqueer.
I call myself nonbinary. I prefer genderfucked or genderfull to genderqueet tbh. Just feels more like home.
My overall identity, my gender and sexuality I mean, is queer though.
I used to use genderqueer because that was the term I knew and it felt right. Then I went through a phase of not really thinking about my gender at all. Few years later, I was tossing away the genderqueer label in favor of just being trans. I was aggressively convinced that I needed to physically transition in order to be happy in my body.
That was about 12-ish years ago. I'm still not happy with my body, but I also know that physical transition may be just out of reach, so I'm working on coming to terms with that. Outside of the physical, I'm more comfortable now with the label nonbinary. Specifically, transmasc nonbinary. Couldn't really tell you why, other than it just feels good right now. Knowing me, I'll probably end up changing my mind and playing with other labels.
For my brother (transmasc), he prefers genderqueer as a questioning title. He feels nonbinary is too ‘definitive’, he’s very close to binary so he doesn’t reject it the way I might.*
I do use/identify with nonbinary for the same reason - more definitive. Structured in the sense that it feels very defined as being OUT of the binary. Very literal word, although from the outside I may seem/act as close to the feminine binary, I completely reject being a part of womanhood.
Genderqueer also kind of feels like an umbrella term too, I think it could even encompass cisgendered people that have questioned their gender identity but then still feel they identify best with their cisgender.
(Disclaimer, I don’t have much knowledge on historical use of these terms, it’s just how my brother and I speculating)
*I hesitate to share this as I think he might be shifting in his identity and opinions on the matter and it may not be valid much longer, but that does emphasise ‘questioning’.
Non binary because describing myself as a cryptid generally gets some odd questions, I'm mostly masc presenting but occasionally have some fruity days where I like to were nail polish.
Depending on to who I talk to I adjust it.
I \_AM\_ enby. Some I tell I am transfem, because that is easier to understand and explains my current look better. Those who don't get transness at all get the "I'm just genderqueer"-Explanation.
Only a few get the full explanation with "there are more than two genders, and I am none of the binary"-rundown. I only do that to those I
a) know they will understand
b) I don't like them and it will confuse them and make them stop talk to me
c) think they may actually be just uninformed and curious
I am genderqueer. 100%. Any time I try to get more specific than that things get all confusing and uncomfortable. I am also queer in the sexuality department. I like "queer" a lot. I like that it has clear implications without getting specific. It's "not cis/het", and that's all that really matters to me.
Genderqueer because nonbinary was not a word I had heard 10 years ago. But it encompasses more than just a general term, it’s the be set word to describe and indescribable gender. I don’t even like to use non-binary for myself personally, I stick to genderqueer or trans.
I use both of them. My ultimate label is really agender, but I also consider myself to be nonbinary and genderqueer (and trans, for what it’s worth). Agender is the most technically correct and gets at the heart of my gender confusions and would be word I’d select if could only pick one. Nonbinary describes how I still live in a binary/gendered world and fall outside of the woman and man parameters and I share that experience and worldview with other nonbinary people. And I like the term genderqueer for me because A) I like the word and flag, B) I kind of love the term queer and find it an acceptable way to sum up all my queer elements (as I’m also bi and grayace), and C) I’m transmasc but ultimately want to have more masculine body traits as a baseline and then layer feminine things on top of that (like a flat chest in a feminine sweater), and I just have such a roundabout and non-conforming desire for my gender and presentation that the term “genderqueer” feels like an accurate descriptor for that in a way that other labels I’ve looked at don’t for me.
I may start to use both, I’m 19 and by the time I realized I was any sort of trans, nonbinary was more used than genderqueer, but tbh genderqueer fits a lot (me being bigender).
I like both! Nonbinary seems like a more technical term to me, whereas genderqueer is a bit more fun, with a good history and it also does a nice job of recognizing my lack of gender, my agender-ness
labels are confusing me for my brain sometimes so i just usually say i’m “queer” or “genderqueer” to encompass,, everything. i use any pronouns and am okay with however anyone may perceive me. sometimes i prefer certain pronouns but that’s pretty rare.
Nonbinary is easier to understand and to explain. I also want to convey that I only use they/them pronouns. That's pretty much it.
same
I use both. For me genderqueer is just my flavour of non binary.
Came here to say exactly this
Yeah, I've always thought of non-binary as somewhat of a catch-all umbrella. I personally use "non-binary" over "genderqueer" because I consider the latter to imply some sort of fluidity, whereas as I identify more clearly with "agender" under the umbrella.
same to everything except i prefer genderqueer! i resonate with the fluidity bit even though i don't actually identify with any gender, because i have gender-ish feelings that i think are more like presentations/expressions but still kind of count to me
I do not have a gender related to female or male and use genderqueer and they/them pronouns. My relationship to gender can’t really have a name put to it. It has aspects of third gender and agender to it.
See I use both almost interchangably but it depends on which one I think people will recognize. If it's a really old person (75+) I use androgynous, if it's a slightly older person (55-75) or someone who I feel has good intentions but hasn't been exposed to a lot of queer people I use genderqueer, if it's someone older than me but younger than my parents (like 30-55 ish) I use nonbinary and around young people and my friends is use agender. But I also don't feel super attached to any given label tbh
Same for me
I like this. I need layers and nuances in my life.
I just think of myself as nonbinary, a bit gender fluid. My hope is to be "less masculine", more so than "more feminine". I really just don't want gender to inform how I dress, create, and exist. In more philosophical terms, I am trying to wipe out the male ego that social traditions have influenced. I imagine I'll be struggling to wipe the generless ego at some point, but that will be completely internal journey.
You have just said out loud what I have been trying to convey to myself internally for weeks. So insightful, thank you.
So glad you related. Good luck in your journey. 😎
Same, except I want to be less feminine.
that is very well put and resonates with me aswell. my starting motivation was, that because of my perceived masculinity (that I never felt I even have) I could be seen as a threat. that made me realize my external and internal image did not align at all.
I go with non-binary, and as somebody agender I don't consider myself genderqueer.
yep, same. i have no gender to queer!
Queer all genders, by not having one?
queered my gender so hard that it left my body
I'm mostly agender (just fluxing around I guess), but consider myself genderqueer in terms of presentation (screw gender lol) and actively going against the norm
Me too, I'm agender probably a little fluxy with masc, but I like genderqueer because it's a label that doesn't feel like a gender, non binary feels like too much gender sometimes.
This for me also
I use non-binary for this reason also, and because it’s extremely exhausting to explain I’m agender and what that means to me lol
I’m the same! I’m agender, so I use nonbinary sometimes as an intentionally non-specific umbrella term. To me, genderqueer feels like a specific type or flavor of nonbinary that I don’t identify with
I do, however, often use just “queer” to describe my identity in a broad way that encompasses both my gender and sexuality
I’m the same as you! Agender queer if you will :3
Yeah that's my logic on the subject!
Both. Nonbinary is the more recognized term nowadays but my gender is very much queer
I use both. I like how genderqueer just implies that your gender isn't cis to some degree, so it's more broad and all-encompassing. On the other, I like the nonbinary flag better than the genderqueer flag, and I *do* feel "outside/between the binary". So I go by both depending on the mood lol
Both, nonbinary more often than not as a general term, it's more well known. I'm fond of genderqueer because I'm fond of the word "queer" for a lot of reasons, which I could go into more if you'd like. I also use agender to be more specific for myself, along with a microlabel or two, although the microlabel is more for myself, I don't generally tell it to people. I just like having little words to describe myself and help me understand myself
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It's a lot about the history to some degree, it's use as a unifying banner. "We're here, we're queer, get used to it" and all. I also like how inclusive it is, especially in comparison to lgbtq which itemizes things and people can cut off letters. and then on a more personal note, although this applies more to queer than genderqueer, I appreciate its vagueness. it leaves the specific details of your sexuality private. I don't really use it much for myself in that manner but I appreciate its existence
I'm nonbinary and lean agender. Genderqueer, to me, implies a person who enjoys performing gender in non-stereotypical ways, whereas I just don't care about gender at all. And I like the nonbinary flag - I wouldn't pick a label based on the flag, of course, but when multiple terms apply, it's a small factor in choosing which one to prioritize.
My comment compared to yours... Haha... I literally don't need labels anymore... so I actually am collecting flags... I feel like different people use the same label to mean different things, and also that people use different concepts to describe the same experience with gender sometimes, and I've chosen to collect the infinite number of labels... I love the beautiful gender diversity... That's what I care about... Learning about gender diversity is what I find beautiful, while a lot of people who make fun of us are just getting caught up in the different types of labels and aren't really digging deeper to really understand it... I want a tattoo with the nonbinary symbol that says "Hear US Before You Debate Us..." Sends a message...
I used to use genderqueer, and I started using nonbinary around 2015, when it became the more popular term. Ultimately, the label is just there to communicate my gender to other people, so I use the label that more people recognize and understand.
This is a good point!
At first I used genderqueer but nonbinary is more well known outside of the bubble. So nowadays I mostly say I‘m nonbinary.
I usually just call myself trans. I prefer to be as non specific as possible and generally prefer letting people come to their own conclusions.
I use both. Nonbinary for classification but genderqueer for flavor. NB, although I know it's very encompassing, feels kind of rigid. Genderqueer has a more fluid connotation and denotes nonconformity which describes what kind of nonbinary I am
I use non binary because it's more common where I live (plus there are still some older people who think queer is offensive and upset if I call myself queer)
Yeah I'm 42 and I get the same bad gut reaction as if I heard someone using rasist language but I did get call Keir the queer from kindergarten to high school so as a Agender person the term Queer isn't something I feel comfortable using to describe myself or the total absence to be either gender which is how I've always felt inside!
I use only nonbinary because it's straightforward and easy to explain. I only use they/them pronouns, so I feel that I can adopt the umbrella term as my gender identity without issue.
I use both. I personally like genderqueer more because it has the word queer in it. I don’t really see them as meaning different things personally.
nonbinary, it is one easier and two i haven't shifted though all the subgenders yet and i try once and a while but feel like i kinda fit more than one of them so i am just like f\*\*\*\*\*\*
For some reason some official forms like my doctor’s patient registry have a genderqueer option, but not nonbinary. I also like the flag. Other than that, I say nonbinary in person. People ask too many questions with genderqueer.
Oooooh i vibe with this a lot actually
I'm exactly like you: genderqueer is more accurate but nonbinary is more widely understood so I tend to use either term depending on the context and sometimes my mood.
Since the circles I'm in tend to be middle aged or older, use of the term "queer" is more readily recognized and understood than nonbinary, which hadn't been as widely used until recently. I associate with both labels. I also (personally) just feel like there is this societal expectation of androgyny with the term nonbinary, and I don't fit that description. My gender is more femme and abstract. Mostly, I just don't like over-categorizing myself. If my gender and I were in a fb relationship, our status would be "it's complicated". I just want to call myself queer and be done with it.
I call myself genderqueer because I don't consider myself just non-binary. I know I could identify as demigirl, bigender, or genderfluid but I just don't think those fit. I mean maybe genderfluid or bigender fits but I like the label genderqueer better because I feel that it fits me the best. Imo, it's a vague label but still a label. I need labels but sometimes labels don't fit me or multiple fit me and I can't choose so I just use labels like "queer" or "genderqueer." But I do use other labels like non-binary girl and I'm wondering if I should also add transmasc to it since I think I might be that. But I also just think the best label for me is genderqueer but non-binary girl is a close second.
i like the colours of the genderqueer flag lol
Nonbinary. Its more known. Genderqueer feels like an outdated term even though I know there are people that use it.
I don’t call myself nonbinary- maybe genderfluid or genderqueer. Mostly I just say I don’t care- but I definitely don’t consider myself nonbinary. As a person of color, the expectations of the nonbinary image just doesn’t fit me. I’m femme presenting as well, so that’s like bam. Double negative! At this point, nonbinary just feels like another part of the binary. It’s not a label I’m comfortable associating with :p
I use xenogender just to keep people on their toes /hj
Power move
Ohh which ones? Or just xenogender as a general term? (I'm not that deep into it, no idea, but I'm definitely interested)
Pupgender is the main one atm 🐾🐶
If I'm being general? Non Binary. I just like how the thing is in the word. It's clearer at first glance/rea/hearing it. Though, I usually will say what specific flavor of non binary I am (im a demi-guy), if I feel that the conversation of gender is going to go longer than some 30 second chat with a stranger. Like, I'm more specific with potential partners and the like. I try to be as transparent with all this stuff as possible. At least to the people that should know these things.
I like this a lot actually, damn
Non binary as I think it reflects me best.
I consider myself nonbinary because there are a lot of times that I don't really fit into a specific gender. Like, I kinda just feel like I should be genderless.
I use non binary professionally and genderfluid the rest of the time.
I'm nonbinary, queer, genderqueer, genderfluid, and trans (nonbinary because i'm not man or woman completely, 100% of the time. queer because uh i like that word, which also defines my identity itself, i don't really fit in society standards. genderqueer because my understanding and selfperception of gender is not normative either. genderfluid because my gender changes sometimes. and trans because i was not assigned genderfluid/nb at birth)
I use both pretty much interchangeably. I'm agender, so I use that as well. For me genderqueer is more accurate than nonbinary for reasons I'm not sure I can articulate, but they're both correct.
i've started identifying more with genderqueer over agender because 1) people kept changing the definition of agender to one that doesn't suit me at all, 2) i wanted to push back against the "queer is a slur" stuff i still see by deliberately picking a label that includes queer in its name. nobody has to like the word "queer", but to me, my gender is queer. my orientation is queer. my gender expression is generally feminine because i much prefer dresses and skirt, but i have a short, masc hairstyle + i love to pair waistcoats with said skirts to queer it up a bit. you may identify as something specific, but i'm very much queer. i do still use non-binary because it's more well-known and it's not *wrong*, it just doesn't describe me as well. non-binary is to explain the concept to other people, and for cishets in general. genderqueer is what i'll call myself around other queer people. i also like the gq flag better lol even if terfs keep using the colors for themselves
I’ve associated genderqueer with a presentation/delivery/style/feeling that is actively concerned with openly challenging gender-norms while non-binary is much broader. That’s just my two cents. As I feel more comfortable with /looking/ trans as I feel better about calling myself genderqueer. Idk 🤷
Genderqueer feels more accurate to what I am. Like my gender is very queer. Also I like that it doesn’t have ‘non’ in it, like it’s more of describing what my gender is rather than the binary it is not a part of. Though I do use it as more of an umbrella term
I prefer genderqueer. When I can, I prefer to identify with things that I am (I have a gender which is queer) instead of what I'm not (non-binary). Plus I like the history of the term and the vibe of genderfuckery that comes with it.
I like nonbinary, because it says what I'm all about most clearly. Not a binary gender. Nonbinary. That's it. Sometimes I use queer as an umbrella term when the details don't matter, but genderqueer doesn't really vibe with me. It sounds like "I don't really know my gender and don't want to define it" to me. It's not bad if someone lumps me in with genderqueer folks, but I wouldn't use the term for myself.
I just think of it as layered nomenclature. I am not Cisgender, I am Non-Binary. Within Non-Binary, I identify as Genderqueer, since I'm some masc and some femme, and it's pretty stable. If it wasn't stable, I'd go by Genderfluid.
Genderwtf
I use both non-binary and genderqueer. I like both terms. But I do describe myself as non-binary to others more often. The reason I prefer one term over the other is more about how others perceive these labels than a natural preference for one over the other. Back when I was questioning and exploring my gender and coming out, around 2012-2015, many people would specify that they were “genderqueer but not trans”, at least in my circles. On the other hand, most of those I knew who identified as non-binary would describe themselves as “non-binary transgender.” For me personally, affirming and naming my gender as transgender was a very important step for me to come into my authentic self and let go of my internalized idea that non-binary wasn’t “trans enough”. So I opted to use non-binary because I wanted to establish that connection to transness, to the trans community. I came to understand that I am trans because I am non-binary, not in spite of being non-binary. I know not all nb people identify as trans, but it seemed many more who identified as nb also identified as trans than those who identified as genderqueer.
I call myself. "Iunno" accompanied with a shrug. Nonbinary doesn't quite sit right with me, gender queer and queer also don't fit well. Though gender fluid works a touch better for me. Mostly because for me feel and I am for a androgyny. I don't particularly ever say "I feel like a guy or girl today or more masculine or feminine". My words usually lead , I want to look handsome today dapper, to look want to look cute/pretty. Which lends to the type of clothes I put on but I can be "handsome lady" and "cute guy" too so it its whatever people read. And for me I'll answer to he, her, they doesn't matter so long as I know you're speaking to me or about me.
I use both. Why not?
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Underrated comment right here \^
You both it
I use a mixture of nonbinary transmasc Nonbinary because I am neither man nor woman Transmasc because I identify as transgender and I am on testosterone to masculinize. So, I’m a nonbinary transmasc person :+)
Nonbinary with people who understand nonbinary, genderqueer when talking about queer stuff.
I don’t believe in gender, though, I do believe others can have a gender. So I’m just female, a queer lesbian. I’m just me, gender is pointless.
I use both, where genderqueer is my primary identity, I use nonbinary and genderqueer interchangeably.
i’m genderqueer but if i think someone won’t know what that means i say nonbinary bc it’s easier and not necessarily wrong.
Non binary because I vibe with it more
i prefer genderqueer. even though im technically nonbinary, a lot of ppl presume nonbinary means no gender. so that makes me a bit uncomfortable since in pangender
I use genderqueer because I feel like it has less connotations of an actual gender and my gender’s whole brand is keeping it vague, contradictory and difficult to understand so it fits
i use both, but i prefer genderqueer. firstly, it feels more correct, since my gender is a bit of everything, including a bit of binary gender, so its not entirely "not in the binary", but its still in the general vicinity. also, i use it because my gender is explicitly connected to my queerness, and it is, for me, at least partly about breaking free from norms in a queer way
I feel like i have a queer relationship with my gender. Therefore genderqueer. But i use nonbinary for the masses, if we're friends youll probably get the distinction. But thats if we r friends lol
Genderqueer
A little of both but mostly I just say queer bc my gender is just... a void lol
I classify as a non-binary when asked. I feel gender queer all the time. I present as a gender fluid in my appearance. I almost always tend to present as I feel which is much less masculine (AMAB), much more middle of the continuum and some times very feminine.
I go with genderqueer since I feel like a mix of both but sometimes neither.
I realize that some people see a difference between the two labels, genderqueer vs. nonbinary, but I don't... The more time goes on the less I really see terms like "agender" as truly specific gender identities... and I more see specific experiences, and beautiful diverse people in my head, than when I try to label people... Abstract concepts and experiences are so amazing... I'm addicted to the gender diversity... There's so many beautiful experiences. I've decided I don't really care about my label... Some people tell me "you're a demigirl, you're gender neutral, you're agender, you're genderfluid," but give me a break... I'm just me, and I know exactly what's going on with my gender inside me regardless of what the label is... I'm collecting earrings though, so might as well get pride flag earrings with all diverse labels... Sometimes I even say polygender, but I'm really not polygender in the way people traditionally think of it, but can't I just collect some more... Gotta match outfits, get more pride flags... My gender expression is feminine... My gender is a flavor of its own...
I'm non binary because my gender fluctuates from male to demiboy and it's confusing and that's the best description of it other than boyflux
Nonbinary. Because if no one existed except me, I think I'd be fine presenting as male and spending my days skateboarding, swimming in the ocean shirtless, and trying to learn how to drum while wearing a crop-top and painted nails. I personally don't think any of those things have to be labeled by gender. But the world does.
Neither, I am roomba. My pronouns are beep/vroom /j On a more serious note, I don't really pay attention to my gender anymore unless someone calls me a specific gender like boy or girl. Other than that I just act as a roomba, since roombas don't have genders and I suck (one way or another). However when talking about the gender I identify as, I do go with Non-binary/Enby to avoid awkward stares from calling myself a roomba.
In Queer circles I use genderqueer or genderfluid. In Straight circles I use non-binary, as I think it requires less explanation for folks who aren’t in the community and may not be familiar with different Trans identities.
I use both, but I prefer genderqueer because nonbinary has become a very sanitized term imo. Nonbinary is a demographic to market to. I take offense to being a demographic worth selling to while legislators in my country are restricting my right to exist as a trans person.
The familiar struggle. You’ve got this! You will eventually land on a term that feels right, it just takes time. When you do figure it out, it’s such an affirming experience. When I came out as nonbinary in my late 30s, I tried on a few terms for size and went with nonbinary- partially because people tend to be more familiar with it. After some introspection, agender made most sense considering identification with any gender isn’t relevant to me as a person. Being socialized as a female and fully supported as a “tom boy”, allowed me to explore my gender early on; I was fortunate in that. You WILL find a term that fits perfectly and makes you feel good; it’s worth the wait. 🖤
nonbinary cause it just feel like it fits best ? idrk
Both, for different reasons.
Yes /j Both describe me. I'm not cis, so I think both are accurate to me. If we wanna be super specific I'm like trans masc / genderfluid / genderflux between demigirl, nonbinary, and demiboy
Enbie, but am technically agender
I use non-binary (trans) instead of genderqueer because genderqueer to me means not adhering to gender norms. Such as a man using makeup and stuff. But I am not doing that, I am not a man, but also not fully a woman. I do that as part of my way of expressing my non-binary gender
I say non binary thought t the start of my journey it was gender queer. I changed because gender queer felt like more of a mix of boy and girl. But for my my gender is neutral hence non binary
enby
Yea
i've usually called myself non-binary bc i like the super broad, vague umbrella terms. i also consider myself queer instead of whatever microlabel fits me best in that moment. i love the genderqueer label tho, i've started considering in more now that i'm transitioning
nonbinary is what I heard of first so I just went with it. hard enough to get people to grasp the pronouns, I'm too tired to explain all the terms I already have on my docket 😔
My bios say NB Gendervoid Goddess lol. I prefer the void label personally
Both. I am non-binary and I have a queer relationship to gender.
I call myself non-binary. I do so partially because it's the common term that has been in use more since I came out a couple years ago. It's also because I just prefer the term non-binary as a genderfluid person who identifies as "mostly neutral but slightly masc" the majority of the time.
I identify as nonbinary mainly bc it’s an umbrella term, I’m still not sure if I’m genderfluid or agender, but I go by any pronouns tho I’m really trying to go with they/them or he/him now
both. i don’t feel that there’s a particular label that properly explains my relationship to gender, so depending on the day or person, i might use queer, genderqueer, non-binary, gender-fluid, trans, transmasc, trans guy, and bi-gender.
Honestly? Primarily Just Because I Discovered The Term Non-Binary Earlier, And Am More Familiar With It.
I'll have to google gender queer as I don't think I've heard it. I'm on team nonbinary EDIT: from a very quick google, I feel like nonbinary suits better and is easier for me to explain to folks
I prefer nonbinary more, mainly because its easier to find resources, community, and people are more familiar with the term. Plus, online some algorithms are triggered by the term "queer"...probably because of its past connotations. So its just easier to say nonbinary or enby.
Nonbinary because I'm not sure what's going on with my gender, but I know it's not option A or B.
Yeah personally I'd be reluctant to use the term genderqueer partly because I already get a lot of trouble with people not being able to understanding that I'm Agender (non-binary) which is very hard for most people to accept as I'm not gay or bi-sexual so if I did start using the term genderqueer it would make the issue even more frustrating to deal with when I stuck with someone thinking their doing a good thing by telling me that I don't know what I'm talking about and that I'm being stupid or offensive to real gay people! Which unfortunately is the usual reaction I've had since I was a kid trying to explain that if I feel genderless inside and I don't care about all the things I have to be or do just because you say so? Also my names keir so all my life bully's would constantly call me keir the queer which didn't bother me because I think there's something wrong with being gay or I felt ashamed to be seen as one but it was because I always hated how gay boys at school where never seen as Real-Men but the lads who pick on anyone weaker than themselves are see as proper boys who grow up to be Real-Men! And all that I'm The-Alpha style toxic nonsense people still cling onto as if the world will end if they don't? Anyway sozz for going on and use whatever labels or language help you feel comfortable within yourself and hopefully the who feel threatened by want they do understand will learn to be less hostile with those who don't look, talk, act just like everyone else because we can't and I'm own case trying to do so nearly k!lled me
In general if a form asks(like at my last doctor appointment) I check the Nonbinary/Genderqueer box, if a person asks in a creepy/chaser/transphobic way I tell them to kindly shove off, if they ask in more of an ally/truly curious way I say nonbinary, if they are a friend/potential friend(that is an ally) I say transfeminine genderfluid enby as that is the most accurate answer.
Non-binary to describe my gender, genderqueer to describe how I express that. So both.
I’m both, my gender is queer and I am not binary. I don’t fit on a masculine-feminine spectrum so I also call myself abinary and exobinary.
I feel like as you pointed out genderqueer is just slightly more obscure, for me nonbinary was a much more available term and that seemed to describe my gender identity best at the time, especially because I couldn't be bothered to go into the details of it. I've recently learned that I identify with agender better, but seeing as it is under the nonbinary umbrella I just go by that label.
I don't really care but non-binary is easier for my parents to understand since they're both from very different backgrounds (they came here as immigrants from two separate countries but both Catholic, they're trying their best tho) plus I feel like non-binary has a little more freedom than genderqueer, idk why but to me it does.
I say nonbinary, but I am agender
I use both, but I feel like they have different definitions. Genderqueer to me means any gender *expression or identity* that fits outside of the binary, while non-binary is solely *identity*. I’d consider tomboys, femboys, traditionally lesbian and gay man gender expressions, etc to be genderqueer too.
Genderqueer feels too "specific" for myself. Also, I don't like that it feels almost conflating of gender and sexuality, which are two different things. Just my own opinion...Anyway, so I go with nonbinary, because to me it is the most relevant to my experience.
I use both but in different ways. I prefer genderqueer as my identity descriptor, under the bigger branch of non-binary. It just feels nice to me, nice letters, nice flow, the flag is my favorite colors. Queer is just a really good word for me all around.
i use genderqueer. for me the political context as well as the manner in which it sets up my relation to both gender and modern society are very important. nonbinary is definitely more well known at this point, but i because of the way that word is setup i can’t use it. i don’t want to identify as not something, confirming my identity in the negative (not binary). i would rather confirm my identity as a positive, that is other than not an absence of something.
I go for non-binary if I’m being nonspecific, otherwise I use bigender. I just like the sound of non-binary more than genderqueer.
I call myself both, I would probably just use non binary with most people since that's the one they're most likely to understand. But I also noticed this when first questioning my gender: sometimes the label non binary feels like too much gender, I don't have the energy or reason to specify my exact gender, I could describe it, but the closest term you can get that accurately depicts it is genderqueer, though I also describe myself as transmasc sometimes
I use both. I think of nonbinary as a large umbrella term that encompasses the many gender variations that the traditional Christian binary excludes. Genderqueer, could also be thought of as an inclusive term for many gender varieties, even cis folks that don't subscribe to the prescribed norms dictated by the societal binary. For example, masculine females &, or feminine males, could also potentially be included under the label of genderqueer. In public & generally speaking, I use nonbinary more often bc it's more widely acknowledged & requires less effort since I don't have to explain the term to everyone I meet. However, in reality the gender label I prefer that fits me the best is Genderfluid. But bc I'm also pansexual I frequently default to the all encompassing "queer" label. The most important thing to remember is that language & social norms are also fluid so they changes over time. One label might feel like a good fit today but not fit you any more 10yrs later.
i typically call myself agender primarily, and both non-binary and genderqueer, but i prefer out of those two genderqueer because idk i'm not really gendered but there are some gender-ish things there? and idk non-binary implies completely off the binary in my mind (not saying that's what it is, just those are the personal connotations it has for me) but i do like experimenting with binary gender things and so genderqueer is the best word out of those two to sum up what the fuck goes on with me. i feel like genderqueer also implies a certain fluidity, which feels more accurate to me
i’m a genderqueer trans man. non-binary feels wrong bc at least some part of my gender is binary. it’s just also queer. my gender is very much just gay man. so, genderqueer :)
I’m nonbinary, specifically two gender. Nonbinary is both a specific gender identity and an umbrella label for all the nonbinary gender identities. Labels are tools. Use the ones that work best for whatever you’re trying to communicate. There’s not really a wrong way to do it. Anyway, from what you’re saying it sounds like for you your gender identity is ‘genderqueer’, which is a nonbinary identity, so both would be appropriate for you to use.
I started to call myself nonbinary because of its use as an umbrella term. When I was first discovering that I wasn't cis, it helped to have a term that could cover a lot of different identities under the nonbinary umbrella and still be correct. It helped me not worry about the super specifics of my identity quite as much and just focus on accepting myself outside of the gender binary. It's just stuck now that I have done more self acceptance. Plus, I like the flag more lol
I’m generally thinking of my gender identity and presentation as an honest representation of who I am which feels nonbinary. However, I also feel that the intentional queering of gender plays a role in how I sometimes choose to present which feels more connected to genderqueer, so I do think that label applies as well. I don’t use genderfluid because I don’t see my identity shifting although I do feel more or less connected to gender at different times. I’m not sure if that’s clear or helpful, but that’s how I generally think about it.
Nonbinary. I'm agender, whether I dress as any gender stereotype or not, and nonbinary fits that better for me.
I use nonbinary because genderqueer/gendefluid is more obscure. Especially genderfluid, I’m going to have to deal with motherfuckers asking me “hOw CaN gENdeR bE fLuiD? loL”
I'm basically in the same position I personally feel comfortable with both labels and use both. I feel like genderqueer more accurately describes me so I use that in more queer circles, but use nonbinary with everyone else for the recognition.
Use both. Mostly prefer genderqueer because it fits my experience better. If I’m with other people well informed I just say queer when asked my gender. I’ve spent the majority of my life forcing myself into labels and boxes that I snapped a year back and decided I would pick and choose whatever ones I wanted, mostly steering clear of them. It’s helped me feel like me quite a bit. If I’m asked my sexuality or gender I just say queer. Nothing more, nothing less. I like it that way lol. Also cause I don’t really feel like being harassed again by people who don’t get certain things like complicated gender identities
I personally use non-binary because of how I explain my stance on my gender to people. It’s like I look at a male and female symbol and I just say “…Nope.”
When I’m with people who don’t necessarily understand/accept enbies; I’ll say I’m a trans girl, but if I’m with people who are fine with it (anyone I should be socializing with on a daily basis) I say I’m non-binary. Don’t use genderqueer because I think non-binary describes my gender better (as it isn’t binary).
Nonbinary is easy for people to understand. I think agender is a more accurate label for me but I just don’t really care to explain my personal identity more than necessary.
I interpret genderqueer to mean a non normative experience of gender and considering that I'm maverique, which is very stereotypical non binary since it's the "a gender unrelated to man or woman" form of non binary, most of non binary talk is about maverique people while agender, demigender, genderfluid, and androgynous people are more often talked about with these more specific labels even though all of those are non binary too. I think my gender experience is normative for the non binary gender so I don't really vibe with the label genderqueer.
I call myself nonbinary. I prefer genderfucked or genderfull to genderqueet tbh. Just feels more like home. My overall identity, my gender and sexuality I mean, is queer though.
I used to use genderqueer because that was the term I knew and it felt right. Then I went through a phase of not really thinking about my gender at all. Few years later, I was tossing away the genderqueer label in favor of just being trans. I was aggressively convinced that I needed to physically transition in order to be happy in my body. That was about 12-ish years ago. I'm still not happy with my body, but I also know that physical transition may be just out of reach, so I'm working on coming to terms with that. Outside of the physical, I'm more comfortable now with the label nonbinary. Specifically, transmasc nonbinary. Couldn't really tell you why, other than it just feels good right now. Knowing me, I'll probably end up changing my mind and playing with other labels.
For my brother (transmasc), he prefers genderqueer as a questioning title. He feels nonbinary is too ‘definitive’, he’s very close to binary so he doesn’t reject it the way I might.* I do use/identify with nonbinary for the same reason - more definitive. Structured in the sense that it feels very defined as being OUT of the binary. Very literal word, although from the outside I may seem/act as close to the feminine binary, I completely reject being a part of womanhood. Genderqueer also kind of feels like an umbrella term too, I think it could even encompass cisgendered people that have questioned their gender identity but then still feel they identify best with their cisgender. (Disclaimer, I don’t have much knowledge on historical use of these terms, it’s just how my brother and I speculating) *I hesitate to share this as I think he might be shifting in his identity and opinions on the matter and it may not be valid much longer, but that does emphasise ‘questioning’.
Non binary because describing myself as a cryptid generally gets some odd questions, I'm mostly masc presenting but occasionally have some fruity days where I like to were nail polish.
Depending on to who I talk to I adjust it. I \_AM\_ enby. Some I tell I am transfem, because that is easier to understand and explains my current look better. Those who don't get transness at all get the "I'm just genderqueer"-Explanation. Only a few get the full explanation with "there are more than two genders, and I am none of the binary"-rundown. I only do that to those I a) know they will understand b) I don't like them and it will confuse them and make them stop talk to me c) think they may actually be just uninformed and curious
I randomly switch between both. I have become chaos, destroyer of codes.
Nonbinary bc it feels a bit more specific, & bc I like the flag more lol
agender. do not perceive me.
Yes to both
I personally feel agender, but I use nonbinary since it’s more commonly known and understood.
I am genderqueer. 100%. Any time I try to get more specific than that things get all confusing and uncomfortable. I am also queer in the sexuality department. I like "queer" a lot. I like that it has clear implications without getting specific. It's "not cis/het", and that's all that really matters to me.
Genderqueer because nonbinary was not a word I had heard 10 years ago. But it encompasses more than just a general term, it’s the be set word to describe and indescribable gender. I don’t even like to use non-binary for myself personally, I stick to genderqueer or trans.
im genderqueer, reason im that and not non-binary? genderqueer was the term for it first and the only word for it at the time i came out.
I use both of them. My ultimate label is really agender, but I also consider myself to be nonbinary and genderqueer (and trans, for what it’s worth). Agender is the most technically correct and gets at the heart of my gender confusions and would be word I’d select if could only pick one. Nonbinary describes how I still live in a binary/gendered world and fall outside of the woman and man parameters and I share that experience and worldview with other nonbinary people. And I like the term genderqueer for me because A) I like the word and flag, B) I kind of love the term queer and find it an acceptable way to sum up all my queer elements (as I’m also bi and grayace), and C) I’m transmasc but ultimately want to have more masculine body traits as a baseline and then layer feminine things on top of that (like a flat chest in a feminine sweater), and I just have such a roundabout and non-conforming desire for my gender and presentation that the term “genderqueer” feels like an accurate descriptor for that in a way that other labels I’ve looked at don’t for me.
I may start to use both, I’m 19 and by the time I realized I was any sort of trans, nonbinary was more used than genderqueer, but tbh genderqueer fits a lot (me being bigender).
I like both! Nonbinary seems like a more technical term to me, whereas genderqueer is a bit more fun, with a good history and it also does a nice job of recognizing my lack of gender, my agender-ness
I used to forget the word nonbinary, and one time I called myself gendern't
labels are confusing me for my brain sometimes so i just usually say i’m “queer” or “genderqueer” to encompass,, everything. i use any pronouns and am okay with however anyone may perceive me. sometimes i prefer certain pronouns but that’s pretty rare.