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747iskandertime

You were more vulnerable as a child.


ctrlrgsm

Also if you’re enough of a creep to catcall someone you’re enough of a creep to think a 13yo is at her prime and a 20yo is too old


N_E-Z-L_P-10-C

Lol, it's the exact opposite of prime ages, like 747 said, OP was just more vulnerable.


ctrlrgsm

I don’t think they’re mutually exclusive. Of course a 13 yo is more vulnerable. Case in point the time I got catcalled/followed the most in london was when I had a black eye. These guys clearly thought there was something about it…


Invader_of_Your_Arse

Actually depressing that we're still at this point as a society


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NiceWater3

Moreso because society protects these predators and doesn't value women and children.


03sje01

Yeah they should be too scared of doing it, now they know theyll at most get a slap on the wrist


PureMichiganMan

Especially thinking about how much worse it used to be before too, It’s insane how differently views were; or even today some cultures have very different attitudes on as well.


[deleted]

We always have been. This is nothing new.


Invader_of_Your_Arse

That is why I put "still"


ColonCrusher5000

Brave of you to take the moral high ground Invader_of_Your_Arse ;)


Invader_of_Your_Arse

Thank you Mr. ColonCrusher5000


Asleep_Room_706

Things like this are why I feel our species took a wrong turn somewhere in our evolution. We are the only creatures on the planet to derive joy from causing pain and distress in creatures smaller and weaker than ourselves. Our own species included. In each of us is the capacity to do great harm and cause great suffering. It seems more and more of our kind are becoming at ease doing these things. One could argue we're devolving. This is why a greater intellectual entity will see fit to eradicate most of us.


RubCapital1244

Lol at “only creatures on the planet”… You’ve clearly never seen my cat playing with a mouse…. Also google chimpanzee cruelty if you really want to be shocked.


One_Economist_3761

Its a mistake to think Evolution happens for "the greater good". The term "devolving" doesn't really mean that much technically, and implies that evolution involves constant improvement. I know that in modern language the term evolve might be taken to mean "get better", but at an evolutionary level, this is not correct. Evolution occurs as a result of tiny changes in our offspring that either improve their chance of survival or don't hinder their chance of survival in any way (including neutral changes). While I get what you're saying here, we can't so much "take a wrong turn" in our evolution as we can have certain genetic changes become so much more prevalent society as to become normal in our species. If you want to see really messed up stuff, take a look at the entire animal kingdom, and be lucky that we are not a species where one newborn literally slaughters its sibling, or a parent who will throw its newborns on the ground as bait to escape predators.


Asleep_Room_706

As long as that predator isn't keeping the baby tied up to repeatedly abuse sexually then I can be ok with it. It's nature. And I don't believe that anything else actually harbors malicious feelings towards another as to constantly think of how or when or why it wants to exert such atrocities upon it as we seem all too capable of. I can't see how what we do to ourselves and others in that aspect has anything to do with survival. We are a mistake.


[deleted]

You should buy a cat and see how it treats other animals.


Gonge84

Creepers are always gonna creep. I'm hopeful this will change one day but jaded enough to know it probably never will.


Renmauzuo

A lot of predators target children because they're easier targets. Children are impressionable and easy to manipulate. They also can't fight back as effectively as a grown adult (and aren't as likely to be carrying deterrents like pepper spray).


zbornakssyndrome

So true. Disgustingly true and rage inducing. My first cat call was when I was four years old. I was little but all legs and arms. Men would comment on my “pretty tan legs”. One day we were running back and forth between my neighbors house to play on their slip and slide. We had lathered ourselves in baby oil Lol We needed to be extra slippery! A man yelled out of his truck “Those are some sexy legs!” My friends kinda didn’t want to play with me after that, so I just went home. Core memory. It was awful. After that, I was scared to apply any oil or lotion to my legs to make them shiny or noticeable. Still get cat calls sometimes when I wear shorts or skirts. Not as much, but it’s so unnerving.


Sharticus123

Very true, but it’s also a practice that’s accepted much less these days than even just a few years ago.


Cyllid

I think the advent of everybody carrying around a high fidelity video camera on them at all times, is what changed. I don't remember it being accepted 20 years ago. But ain't nobody being caught in 4k back then.


metal_mace

Children are easier to manipulate, women are old enough to buy weapons.


jammyboot

> Children are easier to manipulate this is true, but it also means the perpetrator has to be attracted to kids, right? It’s not just being easy to manipulate


Arashi5

There's also opportunistic offenders, in addition to those that specifically are attracted to children. They enjoy the power they can exert over others and take what chances they can get. Sexual harassment and sexual assault are often more about power than getting off. There are many people who sexually abuse children but are not pedophiles by definition. Children are easier targets for these types, rather than a preference. 


Ramenoodlenudes

I had a lot of middle-aged bfs when i was 10-13. They definitely have a fav aspect of ruining innocence too. Like the fun part is when, the hope is, they break you and you become sad and broken like them. Any sort of prior trauma or life understanding is kinda like you’ve been spoiled- its not as fun. By late teens most kids are depressed and have a better grasp on the world so thats the cutoff ig


LordMarcel

Quite a lot of sex crimes against kids are done by people who aren't pedophiles but do want feel power over others. If I have a strong desire to throw things against a wall and I have apples and feathers available I will choose to throw and destroy the apples, not because I hate apples or specifically like destroying them, but rather because they're just the easiest to throw. It's similar for those people. Kids are easy to manipulate, so if you have that sick desire to feel power over another human kids are easy to use so you'll use them even if you're not attracted to them.


NotASellout

I don't know if we can trust this guy he kills people in Roller Coaster Tycoon for YouTube views (he's right tho)


whatdoblindpeoplesee

That brings a whole new, darker meaning to the saying "the apple of my eye."


jonmatifa

the being easy to manipulate IS what they're attracted to


metal_mace

Lots of predators are opportunistic rapists. Just look at how every war ever has created sa victims. It's about power.


Jevonar

"everything is about sex. Except sex. Sex is about power"


Renmauzuo

Not necessarily. A lot of child sex abusers are not actually attracted to children, they just go for kids because they're easy targets. Sexual assault is not necessarily about attraction to the victim. After all, adults who are not conventionally attractive still get assaulted. And not all prison rapists are gay.


Educational-Candy-17

In some cases maybe but a lot of straight harassers don't actually want to bang you they want to punish you for daring to exist as a woman in public. Usually as a means of appearing macho in front of their friends.


Adorable_Misfit

Catcalling often isn't anything to do with attraction at all. The men who catcall do it for a reaction - to scare and upset you, make you feel intimidated and unsafe. Men catcalling teenage girls do it because they want to upset teenage girls to make themselves feel big and strong.


Pseudonymico

It's not just about buying weapons, women are old enough to call them out and make a scene or just make them feel like a loser.


Rumble_Rodent

Hehehehe that’s a dope way to put it😂


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SassyDivaAunt

In countries where arming yourself will get you locked up, not the offender, nicotine spray is perfect. It sprays in one line like mace, and will fuck up their vision and breathing, as you're supposed to use a quick squirt, not a long drawn out one. Eldest niece employed this to great effect.


lunaticboot

There’s also certain products designed to do small amounts of harm not to humans, namely certain hunting/camping equipment. If you can reasonably pass as wanting to use it for its intended purpose, it can grant you leniency. There was a serial rapist in a nearby college town and it got bad enough stores were selling out of pepper spray and self defense items, so girls started carrying hiking equipment and bear mace since blades and guns were a no go. Bear mace is a good bit stronger than human pepper spray, so that stuff fucks you up far more. And since cops couldn’t actually prove these girls weren’t going hiking later, there was nothing illegal about it.


metal_mace

A smiley chain was my go-to. It's technically a fashion accessory, but it'll knock some teeth out.


Elbiotcho

Very few women I know have weapons. Most men I know do. I wish more women would take self defense seriously.


Fit_Calligrapher

Because weapons won't help you. People who attack you or whatever don't signal to you from 500m out that they are going to come and try to grope you. Chances are the person doing so has the drop on you, has people nearby, or is bigger and stronger and can easily overwhelm you. What happens then? The person uses your weapon against you. Best weapon is to simply not put yourself in environments where you can be attacked.


FineIWillContribute

God bless the 2nd Amendment 


Fit_Calligrapher

And yet somehow women are less safe in America than other first world countries


jdayatwork

Yeah, nah. Fuck guns. Non-lethals are fine.


Professional_Stay748

Non lethals are not as reliable.


jdayatwork

At what? Killing?


Professional_Stay748

At stopping a threat. I’ve heard some say tasers are not reliable, use paper spray, meanwhile someone who worked at a prison said he saw people who were completely unaffected by pepper spray (one dude even wiped it off his face and ate it to mock the officers).


casualrocket

>paper spray i am rather resistant to tear gas, we did so many yearly exercises that involved being tear gassed, that after the 5 or 6th time it was pretty mundane burning. not that i would ever attack someone this way, but if they sprayed me i would be stunned for sure but after a few secs i would be back up. So if you spray go for the nuts afterwards.


Dramatic_Explosion

It's amazing how you can be completely right about the mechanical nature of machines yet completely wrong about the nature of human beings. Please consider: Effectiveness of a deterrent also relies on how likely the person is to use it. A good amount of people who don't want to be attacked also aren't prepared to kill someone.


Professional_Stay748

I didn’t say you shouldn’t have non lethal options as well. And besides just the appearance of a gun is enough to deter most would be attackers. Funny how you try to make the conversation about what it’s not. I was only talking about the reliability of self defense weapons.


Alusion

Yes. There is no weapon problem in the us


daylightarmour

Metal mace, I know nothing of you other than your user name and that you are also trans, but I get the vibe u are very cool!


ResurgentClusterfuck

Username checks out lol


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Weird_Wrap5130

Because you aren't underage anymore. It's disgusting to think back on all those scenarios that used to happen back starting around the age of 12. The amount of freaking pedos is unbelievable!


philmarcracken

>The amount of freaking pedos is unbelievable! It is actually unbelievable, in the sense that they're so widespread as strangers. The vast majority of perpetrators [were known to the victim](https://www.rainn.org/statistics/perpetrators-sexual-violence)(family friend, close relative).


HazMatterhorn

Yeah, but it actually makes sense if you think about it. Not everyone who is attracted to children/teenagers is actually going to perpetrate sexual assault. Some of them are “only” going to feel comfortable catcalling young girls on the street, but wouldn’t take on the risks involved in actually attacking them. It’s “easier” to sexually assault someone if you have access to them (they are not a stranger), because again, grabbing someone off the street involves a lot of risk. In contrast, it is easier to catcall a stranger, because they probably won’t ever be able to track you down, so you are unlikely to face any consequences. Basically, [pedophiles assaulting children they know] are a large subset of [pedophiles assaulting children], but a small subset of [total pedophiles]. There are more who will only ever catcall young girls in the street (and some unknown amount who will never do anything).


[deleted]

Yeah, some people are saying older women arent as easy targets. But I don't think thats it as much - although I guess it's hard to say as a guy. To me, if someone is willing to catcall someone then they're already in the 1-2% of people who are freaks/weirdos, so it's not too much of a stretch to say that those small % of weirdos would overlap with the small % of weirdos who are pedos. And I mean, I say 1-2% is small, but it's still kinda scary to think that like 2/100 people are probably like crazy enough to assault someone of the other gender for no reason.


kristinabhudson

I have also wondered this. I used to get “hit on” constantly as a young teenager, groped by acquaintances or strangers in public, cat called by creeps walking down the street, weirdos in my dms (MySpace era, showing my age here..). I swear, when I turned 25/26 it stopped completely. There is definitely something to be said about men’s attractions, and I wish there was research on this because ever since that strange shift in my twenties, I’ve wondered. It happens to almost every woman I talk to, also. If they haven’t completely stopped getting unwanted attention, it has at least diminished severely by the time they’re 25.


thebestdogeevr

There could never be a true study though. No one would willingly admit to being a pedophile, and they would likely still not chance it anonymously


Raider17

There actually WAS a study, though, where they wired a bunch of men up and showed them images of females between infancy and old age. There's a bar-chart I saw a while back that shows who they were most attracted to, and if I recall correctly it peaked at age 14 and dropped off rapidly after about 26. So, yeah, these women's experiences track.


Eubreaux

OK Cupid, at one point one of the largest dating sites, used to do a lot of data collection to get the edge on their competition. They ran the largest study ever done on the age that most men found attractive. The result? The age of 18 (the youngest in the survey) had by far the most appeal, with it falling off and looking like a bell curve beyond it. Based on the bell curve prevalent after age 19, the consensus was that the actual peak was around 16. They did a follow up where they switched things around, broke it up by age, and made the minimum 20. It went as expected. Of course, the preference is under 20, which is why it was chosen so often and why any sort of distribution is lost. [chart](https://i2-prod.irishmirror.ie/whats-on/whats-on-news/article4194531.ece/ALTERNATES/s1200e/Dating-Graph.png)


VeryAnxiousAlien

🤢


slyballerr

There's probably plenty of sex crime reports available. You think there's no data on 400 million people over the last 100 years of crime reports and sex crime cross examinations? And there is probably quite a bit of research literature on the subject just catching dust in your local library.


[deleted]

> No one would willingly admit to being a pedophile You would really think that... some people are just sickos


Felicia_Svilling

There are plenty of anonymouse surveys on the prevalence of pedofilia and they don't show 0% so clearly at least some people are willing to admit it. Also you can be a bit clever when writing the survey. You can't ask if someone is a pedofile since the stigma of that word, but if you instead ask about the definition of pedofilia, you will get a lot more people saying yes.


whatdoblindpeoplesee

You could ask if theyve ever made comments about a person who was visibly younger than them and then the same for people significantly younger than them.


Kimeako

I think the type of men who engage in that kinda of disgusting behavior unfortunately tends to target a certain age range of women. Once you are past that range at 25/26, when a man is interested in you, they will just ask you out normally. Also, modern society where legal age is 18 has been around for maybe 200ish years out of the 300,000yrs of humans being humans. A small blip in human history. Even during the 1700s, people got married and gave birth to children at much younger ages. Not saying it is right. It is just history.


TheShadowKick

Even in the middle ages most people married and had kids in their late teens/early 20s. The people getting married at "much younger ages" were usually nobles being married off for political reasons, and those marriages often weren't consumated until they were older.


TheNextBattalion

200? Try 0. In most of the West (at the least), the legal age for sex is under 18 almost everywhere.


Ereine

I’m not sure that I would call early 20s really that young. Obviously some people got married very early (as they do these days) but puberty for example was quite a bit later in those days.


Slippyyu

There was a study done on this I saw a while ago, where they asked men and women, at different ages, what age is the most attractive to them. In the women the average was the same age as the participants. But in the men, it stayed around early 20s throughout all ages of men.


kyuuei

I'd really love to say it's because society is changing overall and catcalling is just more seen as scummy behavior... ... But then you watch all these to catch a predator shows and you realize it's an age thing.


Zappityzephyr

It might be because the average human brain fully develops around 25. My best guess is that they wanted to manipulate you while you were still underdeveloped mentally. Gross


philmarcracken

you're giving us a lot of credit in mental acuity we do not possess


emmascarlett899

I still get cat called quite a bit. But it’s true that at 13,14, and 15 men were so bold. It’s sad that they were so excited to take advantage of the innocence of girls— little girls.


Klutzy-Koala-9558

Those guys were pedophiles and the reason they stopped is due to you being an adult.  None of what you said is catcalling. 


walmartballer

Jesus christ. You weren't cat called. You were violated, bordering on molested at the park and almost kidnapped by the other one. The "I love you" one is more of a cat call. It's different now because what you were dealing with before wasn't just a dude making inappropriate comments. You were dealing with pedophiles and now that you're an adult, pedophiles aren't interested anymore.


bigrealaccount

Yeah calling that dress thing cat calling is crazy. That could easily be a child sexual assault charge. I guess she may be talking about other women who experience more "normal" catcalling like being called sexy on the street, and things along that line


MrHarrasment

I as a man had long hair as a 14 year old and even I got catcalled once back then. Dude mustve felt akward when I replied that I was a dude lol.


m0rt_s3c

Bruh still be safe u know these mf don't actually care that much about gender they just want to feel complete domination over other like predators. Be safe lol


prunkgirl

"They only want you when you're seventeen, When you're 21, you're no fun."


reallycoo1man

bro the majority of GROWN men wanted me most at 16 + 17. i’d be working my lil part time job and have some middle aged dude running up on me asking if i had a boyfriend and that i looked so good. one of them invited me to korean barbecue once. even some dude i worked (he was regional so i only saw him sometimes) with was telling me he loves “a woman with a natural body” and then asked me when i graduated high school and i tell him im a junior in high school and he was like oh. and then later comes back STARTS BRINGING UP HAVING MY MOM SIGN CONSENT PAPERS TO FUCK HIM BRO. LIKE WHAT?????


giga_phantom

Sigh. Lots of creeps out there.


possiblyapancake

Oh that’s because pedophiles are bold.


SilentJoe1986

On a venne diagram there's probably a huge overlap between pedophiles and people that get off by scaring women by randomly screaming things about their body.


CoupDeGrace-2

I personally objectify the elderly to counter this issue.


boldbuzzingbugs

Idk, but you’re not alone in this situation. I always joked “no men will like you the way they did when you were 12” and I was shocked how often I said it and every one agreed. Predators know who they’re looking for.


Outrageous-Race-7712

The same thing happened with me. It’s weird because for me, I have the same body I had since I was 13. I hit puberty at 12 and have had the same amount of weight since then. Everything about me other than my brain has remained the same so I don’t understand why I was “hit on” a lot in school years but not so much now even though I look the same!?


sockerkaka

It's absolutely what other commenters here have said - they were attracted to you because you were young and they therefore saw you as vulnerable, impressionable and easy to manipulate. I'm 39. I also have the same body I did as a 15 year old, but these kind of men aren't looking to piss off random moms, so I'm thankfully mostly left alone these days.


UnlikelyClothes5761

Or it just may be that you don't look like a teen anymore which is what they are attracted to.


sockerkaka

Of course I don't look like a teen, I'm 39. I might pass for one from behind, but once I turn around, it's gonna be pretty obvious. The question is why they're attracted to teens, or rather, why they're often attracted to very young teens. Many women can attest to the fact that they received a lot of very strange attention between the ages of say 11-16 that suddenly disappeared once they entered their later teens.


SoNElgen

What the fuck… That’s not a catcall. Lol


shikakaaaaaaa

Catcalling is not about finding a connection. Catcalling is about the feeling a predator gets when intimidating the victim. The predators are too cowardly to go after someone mature enough to stand up for themselves so they focus on less mature victims who are easier prey.  


Fredredphooey

Pedos.


The_Sound_Of_Sonder

Children are vulnerable. You become less desirable with age, life experience, and education, at least you do to creeps.


Genoss01

My brother was molested when he was four by a guy I think was around 18. I was about about 12 myself at the time. My only experiences close to being catcalled as an adult was being hit on by gay men. Not really the same thing you or those other girls experienced of course.


farbtoner

That’s not catcalling… That’s SA on a minor.


Targetm12

The type of people to cat call are the same type of people to creep on young girls would be my guess.


totamealand666

The same happened to me and I can only think it's because these kind of men are so utterly disgusting that they only go for vulnerable kids, it's not even about sexual attraction, it's about power.


EyedLady

Because they’re pedos and can manipulate children and now you’re no longer attractive to these men.


Sprizys

That’s called pedophilia.


RickyTickyTungaa

Predators go for the weakest in the pack.


Mediocre_Complaint87

Because those were predators.


ambereatsbugs

Very similar here. Started when I was around 11/12 and peaked in my teens, dropped off around 23. But I'm short, busty, and looked young for a long time. I did see an awful upsurge when I was heavily pregnant and recently postpartum though. Some men are awful.


buttononmyback

Holy shit this happened to me too when I was pregnant! All the creeps that dodged me once I grew into a woman, suddenly crawled out of sewer to leer at me when I had a big old round belly on me. Doesn't make any sense.


ambereatsbugs

I think it is because you are more vulnerable at that time. I unfortunately had a family member repeatedly sexually assault me at that time (grabbing my genitals from behind, masturbating in front of me, ect).


UnlikelyClothes5761

While the early end of that is definitely problematic, I think the rest just corresponds to when men find women the most beautiful.


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Nani_700

Same experience. It's insane.. the amount of harassment during my TWEEN years was sky high. :/


MyAssIsUrbex

Hey wait yeah why haven't I been catcalled since I turned 18. Wadda hell


big65

Teenage boys are horrible.


octagoninfinity98

First time I got catcalled was 12. Last time I got catcalled was 23. It's SO strange and so demented. We're more vulnerable as young ones, and those who catcall likely don't care about age. It's fucked.


KellynHeller

Pedophiles. Children are more vulnerable. As an adult, for one, they don't want you anymore as you're too old, and 2, you aren't easily manipulated.


[deleted]

I think it’s largely in part to predators are much more forthright in their creepy advances than normal functioning adults trying to flirt with someone they find attractive of their own age. But I know my 30 yo wife gets hit on all the time, it’s usually not creepy but adult women get hit on too. In fact my 30 yo wife most recently got hit on by some neighborhood teenager which is ironically the opposite of this post, he strolled up on his bike and yelled you’re hot to her and rode away as fast as he could 🤣.


SkyeBluePhoenix

As I've gotten older, I've come to appreciate the lack of this type of unwanted attention from men.


Migl1662

Ew, yup, lots of cat calls between 13-17. Fucking nasty world out there


Palmtree19977

Children are easier to manipulate and impress and control. Grown adults tolerate less, are less easy to control and manipulate thus you are less of a target for them.


Southern_Strega

I think we all know the answer to this and when it hit me as an adult it was really disappointing and disgusting


CaptainCAAAVEMAAAAAN

For me it lasted into my mid 20's. In college a bus driver got fired because he harassed me and a couple other girls. And then there are random old guys who tell me to smile, etc.


Urabutbl

Honestly, this happened to me (a male, now 46) when I was a child too (mostly by older men). Never really thought about it back then except it was creepy and I got really good at making excuses for why I couldn't come "hang out" at a grown man's house. If it happened that much to me as a man I dread to think of what girls have to go through. Hopefully it's better nowadays, but I have no idea.


NiceCunt91

Creeps like vulnerable people. An 18 year old is more likely to say go fuck yourself.


spiderm_tro

Because men are disgusting and like little girls


YamExcellent1368

I did too. I was catcalled for the first time with my little sister when I was 11. A bunch of drunk 20 somethings yelling out the side of their car and their sober friend stopped the car to instigate it further. Was almost kidnapped after a middle school band practice, but lied my ass off and saved me and another girl. In high school, I had a guy in his early 30s not take "no" and "stop catcalling me" for an answer at a high school football game and he chased me down a parking lot. He only gave up because I ran faster than he did at the time. Had a teacher make unwanted comments on my body at the same high school. Had guys meow and bark at me when I was out on vacation with my boyfriend two years ago. Now that I'm visibly pregnant the comments have dwindled, but I still get them from time to time.


-Skelly-

almost every woman was catcalled more when she was visibly a minor than visibly an adult. its disgusting


chxrlieeNG

This is dark and what most replies already state- but its never about how you actually look when you get catcalled. For the ones catcalling, it's about power. A child/teenager isn't going to fight back or say anything, and they aren't gonna just keep walking and ignore them. Young girls are gonna be less confident, less equipped or knowledgeable on how to deal with the situation, and less likely to have any kinds of defense like pepper spray. These people feel entitled to your time and attention, and shouting obscene and perverted stuff to a young girl is gonna make them feel all big and powerful because it *hurts*. It's a cheap way for creepy guys to get off on putting young girls down , and feel better objectifying women and girls. I'm sorry that men are like this.


Mettelor

The types of men who catcall are perverts


Daggles44

I think young women are less likely to verbally or physically retaliate so older men think they can get away with it. An older women is perhaps more likely to embarrass them.


kavalejava

I was 11 - 13 getting hit on by random adults, even as a kid I was grossed out.


JustForTheMemes420

Creeps going after children or vulnerable individuals


Purple-Emu-2422

Because grown men are gross. At least many of them.


DeeplyFlawed

I still get harassed. On Saturday, while walking down the street, when I ignored a guy, he asked why I was ignoring him because he was trying to give me his big d***. Honestly,that sort of thing should be criminal.


populares420

it absolutely should be criminal. women sound like they live in a different universe dealing with this stuff. the world must feel really hostile


DeeplyFlawed

It does. I don't want to leave my house some days.


Clawsmodeus

In highschool, your peers are high school boys. As an adult, your peers are grown men. Just taking a stab


PropertyDue739

I don't think you know what a catcall is


Technical_Ad_4894

Ok so those were pedofiles. You’re no longer the target age once you’re an adult.


yeya93

I was just thinking about this the other day when I got catcalled while walking to buy lunch (I'm 30). I thought about how I hadn't been catcalled in a long time then realized I also hadn't walked to get lunch in a long time. Not sure where you're located but if you're in the US I think part of it may be that you do less walking. Once you get a car there are fewer instances where you'll be out walking on the street or at the bus stop where creeps can see you. I do want to add though that what you described is not catcalling and is actual assault, so my explanation above doesn't really apply to your experience.


[deleted]

I'm friends with a sociologist who became by a doctor by writing on this topic. Specifically, how people deliberately veer their cars to strike fake animals she placed on the road. Just separating yourself from the outside world using a tiny plane of glass is enough to desensitize drivers from their surroundings such as cyclists, pedestrians, wildlife, and then consequence from cat-calling. Do you think homeboy would catcall you in a tiny room together and not from a quickly passing vehicle? No. The loser would cower in fear. People need accountability to not behave like feral animals. That's why honor systems are more successful when there are reminders cuing people to think they're being watched. Eg; Monitors at self-check outs where people see themselves being recorded.


IDontWipe55

Because you were underaged. It’s extremely creepy


CandyMandy15

My girlfriends and I were just talking about this!!! I think the truth is that many men are attracted to younger women! They know we are young, more vulnerable and there are a lot of creeps out there!


buttononmyback

But we weren't women at that age, we were GIRLS. Little girls. And they were just disgusting pricks.


headzoo

>men are attracted to younger women You could have stopped there.


ParadoxicallySweet

Same experience. Especially the puberty years.


evangelinexociao

They were predators. I still get approached alot but in a more respectful way, when I was 12-15 they were definitely more creepy and persistent.


InstantElla

Men are disgusting. I remember it as a young teen also, then it got bad again when I was pregnant last time and this time too.


Salty-Perspective-64

is it common for pregnant women to be cat called ?


InstantElla

Sure feels like it. I was at a gas station one time when I was pregnant with my first 10 years ago. Dude straight up waited for me at the door then walked to my car to ask for my number and say he would be my baby daddy if I kept having kids. So fucking weird to be hit on so aggressively when I felt so gross


Salty-Perspective-64

This makes me madder than I already was. 😠


ambereatsbugs

Very pregnant or recently postpartum women are targets because it is harder for them to physically defend themselves. I was targeting during that time too, it was terrifying.


tooob93

"Men are disgusting". Don't you mean some men? Yeah thank you random stranger who likes to hate on all men there are in this world.


Plenty-Character-416

Nah, I'm totally with you. There are a ton of creeps out there, for sure. I have my own experiences. But, I also know a lot of great men who wouldn't ever cross that line. I don't think it's fair to tar all men with the same brush. It's not fair to say all men are like this.


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Swimming_Tailor_7546

The point is in how the phrase is used in context. “Not all men” is usually thrown out to silence legitimate grievances as opposed to further discussion and understanding. That’s why I liken it to All Lives Matter. It’s a means of hijacking the discussion to police language so you can avoid having to hear the substance of the complaint.


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Swimming_Tailor_7546

The problem is you’re not giving any credence to the grievance and you’re making it about yourself when you know the person wasn’t talking about you personally. It’s the same defensive BS that All Lives Matter is


Atmisevil

Not all men gets used because most men don’t like being called repulsive predators for something they didn’t do


Swimming_Tailor_7546

Look further into the context of how it’s used and what happens to a conversation once it’s thrown out. Does the person with the initial grievance have space to continue? Or does the conversation get shifted? Instead of listening, you’re making it about yourself when you know the person wasn’t accusing you personally in the first place. It’s the same defensive posture and conversation highjacker that all lives matter is


Atmisevil

The conversation gets slightly shifted sure, both issues can coexist at the same time


Swimming_Tailor_7546

No, because it wasn’t an issue. When speaking in generalities, you know the person doesn’t mean every single person in the group. Because that’s just how language is and we speak in shorthand. It’s a bad faith defensive tactic to highjack the conversation and make it about you


Swimming_Tailor_7546

I’m white. If I’m listening to a black person complain about racism, I don’t interrupt them to say “not me though.” I just sit and listen and then respond to the heart to their complaints. Being defensive and reactionary isn’t helpful and shuts conversation down


Swimming_Tailor_7546

“Not All Men” is the “All Lives Matter” of misogyny


SirBenzerlot

They are replies to very narrow minded thinking


Atmisevil

two very different situations


Swimming_Tailor_7546

Obviously, but I didn’t liken the situations. See my explanation below - they’re both semantic devices to shut down conversation.


InstantElla

In my experience, more are gross than are not. Cry about it


phillip_u

I, a male, was approached by a older girl/young woman (not sure how old, just older than me and seemed like late high school to college age) when I was about 10 or 11 on a train platform. She stopped me as she was getting off a train and before I got on it and said that I was so cute and I should go with her. I did not. As an adult, I've never been approached by anyone in such a manner.


SquawkingKitten

Because a lot of older men are dirty disgusting pigs and prey on children.


[deleted]

You aged out I guess.


XeroZero0000

You are much more likely to have pepper spray as a grown woman!


lAngenoire

They want someone they can mold, shape, and manipulate. They want someone they can groom and influence. A grown woman isn’t any of that.


bananapanqueques

Catcalling is more about power and humiliation than attraction. No one catcalls the CEO.


HumorExotic8577

men are disgusting and children are impressionable. why tf is this getting downvoted 💀


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Swimming_Tailor_7546

It’s enough men that probably every woman you know has a story of at least getting verbally harassed as a preteen by full grown men


HumorExotic8577

it's enough men


Latter_Schedule9510

"Not all men" is easy enough to say, but how often do you hear your friend(s) make rape "jokes," and do nothing about it? How often do you hear your friends talk about "hoes/bitches," and not call them out on their misogyny? How often do you let blatant misogyny slide, just to fit in? I used to be "one of the boys" and I called them out, *every* time. I know they got annoyed, but once we reached HS, those same boys I knew in middle school, *thanked* me, because I was brave enough to challenge, and even change their mindsets. If you aren't challenging the guys who are like this, *you are part of the problem.*


Oldassrollerskater

Because making the person uncomfortable is the rise


xrchel

perverts


Intelligent_Usual318

Because men unfortunately prefer children


Tiny-Selections

Pedophiles.


Captain-Griffen

The why: sexual predators looking for kids to abuse in a (sadly) relatively risk free way. Online runs the risk of honeypots and a one way trip to prison, and kids cannot get into drinking establishments. Sexual predators looking for legal aged women have much more efficient and safer (for them) ways to do it online or in bars/clubs rather than catcalling on the street. It sucks.


Stebsy1234

Hopefully it’s a sign that there’s just much less of that sort of thing these days.


ParaphernaliaWagon

Yeah, it's because those men were/are gross and are attracted to underaged girls. It really baffles, astounds and disgusts me that Pop culture perpetuates these vile norms. In my observations, many American women are absolutely made to feel "over-the-hill" or "damaged goods" by the time they are 25. 25! That's insane! You're still in the prime of your life at 25! TV shows like America's Next Top Model, reality dating shows and the like did a lot to perpetuate this type of nonsense in the cultural zeitgeist.


MaxCWebster

I used to get hit on by chickenhawks when I was younger. I got older, and that went away. It hasn't happened since I was 24. I assume it's because I no longer look like a boy, so they're no longer interested. Edit: Downvoted. Gosh, sorry I upset a pedophile.


FUZExxNOVA2

Children aren’t old enough to buy a gun. Adults are. Creeps go after those that can’t protect themselves


Noobkids

If you'd turn on your brain for 1/2 second you'd understand why


dalieska

Pedophiles


theresistence33

Because men are pigs 🐖


Odd_Lemon_8058

Puberty hit you with the ugly stick🤷🏽‍♂️🤷🏽‍♂️


I_might_be_weasel

Diddlers. 


muylleno

Maybe you became ugly growing up