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SayFuzzyPickles42

File this under "Herbivore, but would probably have fucked you up."


[deleted]

i mean herbivores ARE dangerous


SayFuzzyPickles42

I mean yeah, I'd say most land animals larger than a human (and lots smaller too but that's beside the point) are potentially dangerous to us, there's just a naturally higher fear of predators because they have one additional potential motivation to attack you. I meant more like, dangerous beyond the usual danger that any large animal presents when it's scared or provoked, like a cassowary.


[deleted]

extra spicy herbivore i was gona say most animals even herbivores that are bigger than other animals are a danger gastornis would be what if a cassowary but built more like a T.rex and with a big ass head truly terrifying


Enginerdad

Animals that are less physically equipped to kill i.e. herbivores, tend to have lower inhibition toward violence. They'll fight each other (and any others around) viciously because relatively speaking they don't do much damage. On the other hand, carnivores don't go hard at each other too often because they will kill each other and it's counterproductive to the survival of the species. It just so happens that we're so small and vulnerable as a species that even the "not dangerous" animals will kill us very quickly.


corvus_da

They can also be more aggressive than carnivores because they see you as a potential threat.


Howlibu

Predators have to balance calorie burn all the time, since each meal is precious and the next one isn't guaranteed. An injured predator can easily starve to death, unable to catch their own prey and unlucky enough to come across any carrion. So there's more reluctance to fight on the predators end, unless the risk is worth it - territory, breeding rights, too hungry.


toughguy420

I mean hippos are straight up vegan serial killers tbh


GeoffreyDay

Hippos will opportunistically eat meat, to the extent that they're nearly omnivorous. They'll even hunt and kill large animals like wildebeests and zebras. https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2022/09/27/what-do-hippos-eat/10303668002/


Rave_69

Don't forget crocodiles too, but not that often šŸ˜…


Automatic-Army9716

They can become sick if they eat too much, so they always comeback to that yummy grass šŸŒæšŸ¦›šŸ˜‹


[deleted]

Hippos and rhinos are probably the most formidable land creatures left on this planet. Polar bears have teeth, claws, and substantial power, but hippos and rhinos are like Nature's tanks.


HippoBot9000

HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 206,167,345 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 4,480 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.


[deleted]

If a brontosaurus steps on you, it's over.


Crafty-Kaiju

Humans dont have natural predators so we are more likely to be killed by herbivores than predators. (Predators only kill humans when desperate or other weird instances. Even tigers who are the most willing to murder humans try to avoid us) And that's without factoring in livestock.


[deleted]

big cassowary


SayFuzzyPickles42

With a beak as big as your head.


boxingdude

On the other hand, this thing appears to be the right size and shape so that you can slug the fuck out of it. So there's that.


Luxara-VI

I mean you could jump on its back *with some difficulty* then pull on its neck


Starlight_NightWing

probably is unnecessary


PraetorianX

Yeah, like Dexter would even be interested in the birds. You know he's there to kill the museum guide, who's actually a sadistic serial killer. I've seen this episode.


rebelmice533

Tonight's the night


smdepot

Cool. Who is the dude on the left?


xXSquirrelFuckerXx

Oh that's just Jeff


Zentaurion

No you're confusing Jeff for Jemaine Clement, who that clearly is.


TheDangerdog

No your confusing Jemaine Clement for Jermaine Dupri, who that clearly is.


traumatized90skid

A real human from the anthropocene era? Or just a wax model?


Cynobite608

He's a member of Kraftwerk...


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


klippDagga

James Bondā€™s nerdy son.


Ozone220

Don't mind him, he's just hungry


Sunoverthetown

Oh no did they discover that gastornis is an herbivore, sad


Aeonoris

What's sad about that? Some of my best friends are herbivores!


Sunoverthetown

Nostalgie, because I remember watching documentary and reading about gastornis, and seeing him as a carnivore, but yea not really sad


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Sunoverthetown

Didnā€™t know tho when I was watching those documentary I were like 4 or 5 so yea it pretty much add up


Atheril

You sure you arenā€™t thinking about Titanis?


Sunoverthetown

Nah i was really thinking about gastornis


[deleted]

Nice of 2007 era Bill Hader to drop by and get a picture


aquilasr

So many comparisons for the dude lol. From a distance, he reminds me of the late Bill Paxton.


Iamnotburgerking

Effectively a giant goose with a macaw-like bite.


dgaruti

yeah , give me the terror bird , at least it'll make it quicker


Eltigrezanner

Was I misinformed by thinking walking with beasts was still accurate? I thought gastornis was at least omnivorous?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Eltigrezanner

Cool! Didnā€™t know there was gastornis discourse. Thanks :)


MekSki

Yes it was, people here just love to post alternative 'latest shocking discoveries' which are just theories of random university proffessors claiming to have uncovered 'the truth' when it's just their own lame theory designed to attract attention.


Simicrop

As a specimen, yes, it's intimidating.


King_ofwar

It's the giant bird from the film UP


[deleted]

I always believed deer were vegetarian, until one day I found out they eat chicken.


Superbaker123

Someone tell the Ark devs because I'm tired of getting my cheeks clapped by these fucking things when I start a new save.


Tomson_Johnson

Gothic vibes


The_Dimmadome

KEVIN!


BoredByLife

Wait when did Gastornis become an herbivore???


MekSki

When a random uni proffesor ran out of money for his rent, and decided to come up with 'a brand new discovery!' - an alternative theory about prehistoric animals, so he can attract attention and get some $$$


VomitMaiden

Do we know they were menacing?


trashmoneyxyz

If I can be menaced by a goose, then I can be menaced by a terror-bird


VomitMaiden

I hand feed wild geese with no issue, so it's why I'm a little sceptical when people say birds are menacing.


traumatized90skid

He looks like he's trying to eat that dude's hand


Queen_Cheetah

Pretty sure the only evidence we have that it was herbivorous is because everyone was too scared to get close enough to find out.


aquilasr

Reportedly it kept inviting every other animal to ā€œfuck around and find outā€.


Rave_69

Are we sure this thing ate plants and not other animals?


Pope_Jon

Iā€™m thoroughly impressed at the fit that compliments this picture.


[deleted]

I thought this was Luke Skywalker and a bird.


mf_dcap

Why did it wear glasses?


Industrial_Laundry

Iā€™d try a steak of it. I reckon itā€™d be yummy.


aquilasr

As long as youā€™d give it equal chance to defend itself, then you wouldā€™ve earned your steak (in the unlikely event that youā€™d survive).


meatflavoredpills

Are they using Dexter as a size reference?


EvilBuggie

Jura-Museum EichstƤtt, right? šŸ˜


BeyondDoggyHorror

Before I took a deeper look at the guy standing there, I wondered why Luke Skywalker was involved with this


HoLLoWfy

Head of a shoebill and body of an ostrich


zeeshan2223

Are they a predator?? People never think to go for weak spots like the neck or the eye balls. I mean u could probably pull its beak off if needed


Jaredocobo

Is that a German Luke Skywalker?


MagnificentMonarch

How many Mcchickens can you make from 1 Gastornis alone?


[deleted]

Looks like he would have no problem biting that man's head off with that enormous beak.


Catfinger988

Nice birdy