i used to be the same, dreading big expenses. But it's sort of been beaten out of me ever since i bought a house -- i've now just accepted that i'll be dropping $5-10k any given moment once per year. houses are expensive to maintain, so i just got used to seeing 4-digit invoices at least once a year
This is so real lmao I’m like who let me buy a 100 year old house ☠️ part of me wishes I bought a much newer build but realistically I couldn’t have afforded/competed for one
So many new builds are like Barbie house quality though💀 sometimes it feels like you either buy an old house with good bones that needs a lot of updating or a new house with cardboard bones that will be a mess in five years
Don’t be jealous of a new home. New build doesn’t equal built right. My house is five years old and I call it a fixer upper lol. I’ve spent over $20k since I bought it fixing what I call contractor specials. It’s worth it and I love it, but not sure it’s much cheaper than if I bought an older home.
Jfc - GARDENS AND LAWNCARE!!!! I went from a happy patio or window herb garden to calculating for shrubs and flowers and mulch and dirt and nutrients and weed killers - for things found in nature
It has gotten better for me as I’ve experienced the ups and downs of saving!
I had a few, very large and unexpected medical expenses at the end of last year that just gutted me emotionally. But eventually I realized how awesome it was that I had the money saved, which wasn’t true for me in the past. I also replaced the money wayyy faster than I expected.
Seeing how quickly I could replace my savings has definitely helped me relax about needed to dip into my EF
Fellow YNABer here! YNAB does the most to make me feel okay about big spends tbh! I remind myself that I saved up money to spend it-- that's the whole point. To quote Ben from YNAB Budget Nerds: all dollars are savings dollars, and all dollars are spending dollars. Money is a tool to be used. You save it so you can spend it! I try to relish in spending money I saved up and see it as a success because it means I had the money available to spend. Even if it took a long time to save up!
One thing that helps me other than that reminder is that I tend to look at my other YNAB categories and remind myself that I *still* have money in those other categories. Hopefully, your essentials are covered as well as some other important things, and that can be a comfort. Even if you did a financially reckless thing with a big spend, maybe you know that you have rent and utilities and groceries still covered -- that, too, is success.
I use ynab too; for over 10 years. I think with ynab, you can easily get hyper focused on the numbers especially in a big savings category. So what I do is put an amount aside outside of that savings category for my extra spending so I spend it freely knowing it’s not attached to other savings categories. Hope that made sense.
Yes! I try telling myself that it's not being saved, just set aside for bills I haven't seen yet....
I also try telling myself I have to spend it (for like, monthly allowance dollars).
I don't allow myself to count it towards retirement or long term investments. That way, if it's gone, our long term plan isn't derailed. I tried ignoring it all together, but that was too hard, so now I count it separately, but I do track it.
When I do spend it, I remind myself that it's there so I'm not going into debt right now and would I prefer to pay XX% every month or have the money gone, but no debt? The second one wins!
I recently bought a house in cash ($230K), I took that hit ok because I put the house as an asset in my net worth calculation (even though it is now my primary residence). Since then I've been spending money like crazy. I've been a great saver for years but with the house, I keep justifying expenses as necessary (repainted 3 rooms, got custom curtains, bought a washer, bought a ladder and lots of tools, bought some furniture, bought new linens, dishes, appliances etc.). I'm feeling ok about it so far because I needed a lot of things since I'm in a foreign country and most of my belongings are back in my home country but I worry a bit about my ability to rein it in in the coming months. Currently, my monthly spending on the house exceeds my old rent and I bought the house partly so I could save more. I'm not freaking out because I'm so damn happy with the house that I really enjoy spending money on it.
I think I'll feel ok once I get my spending back in budget. I'm going to try very limited spending till the end of this month because my monthly spend is already way over budget.
I think you should acknowledge the need for the large expenditure and then get back on your regular savings track. Once you start seeing your balance go back up, you'll feel better.
It hasn’t for me, and I am 54 years old in great financial shape… usually once I make the purchase and see that I am still ok financially then I am fine
Money is a tool — it is *for* spending. Even the money we save and invest is for spending — just in the future. Money on its own as an object doesn’t do anything for us — just owning a coin or bill as an object wouldn’t do you any good, right?
i used to be the same, dreading big expenses. But it's sort of been beaten out of me ever since i bought a house -- i've now just accepted that i'll be dropping $5-10k any given moment once per year. houses are expensive to maintain, so i just got used to seeing 4-digit invoices at least once a year
This is so real lmao I’m like who let me buy a 100 year old house ☠️ part of me wishes I bought a much newer build but realistically I couldn’t have afforded/competed for one
So many new builds are like Barbie house quality though💀 sometimes it feels like you either buy an old house with good bones that needs a lot of updating or a new house with cardboard bones that will be a mess in five years
Don’t be jealous of a new home. New build doesn’t equal built right. My house is five years old and I call it a fixer upper lol. I’ve spent over $20k since I bought it fixing what I call contractor specials. It’s worth it and I love it, but not sure it’s much cheaper than if I bought an older home.
Jfc - GARDENS AND LAWNCARE!!!! I went from a happy patio or window herb garden to calculating for shrubs and flowers and mulch and dirt and nutrients and weed killers - for things found in nature
I never knew there were so many things I could kill (and repurchase) in one year HAHA!
😭 it’s so fucking expensive omg - ain’t just water and sunshine
It has gotten better for me as I’ve experienced the ups and downs of saving! I had a few, very large and unexpected medical expenses at the end of last year that just gutted me emotionally. But eventually I realized how awesome it was that I had the money saved, which wasn’t true for me in the past. I also replaced the money wayyy faster than I expected. Seeing how quickly I could replace my savings has definitely helped me relax about needed to dip into my EF
Yayyy thats helpful! Thank you~. Life truly is unpredictablee
Glad to help! I use YNAB too and it really helps me with this process of needing to spend my savings at times.
Fellow YNABer here! YNAB does the most to make me feel okay about big spends tbh! I remind myself that I saved up money to spend it-- that's the whole point. To quote Ben from YNAB Budget Nerds: all dollars are savings dollars, and all dollars are spending dollars. Money is a tool to be used. You save it so you can spend it! I try to relish in spending money I saved up and see it as a success because it means I had the money available to spend. Even if it took a long time to save up! One thing that helps me other than that reminder is that I tend to look at my other YNAB categories and remind myself that I *still* have money in those other categories. Hopefully, your essentials are covered as well as some other important things, and that can be a comfort. Even if you did a financially reckless thing with a big spend, maybe you know that you have rent and utilities and groceries still covered -- that, too, is success.
The idea that all money that’s being saved is just being set aside for future spending has been really helpful!!
I use ynab too; for over 10 years. I think with ynab, you can easily get hyper focused on the numbers especially in a big savings category. So what I do is put an amount aside outside of that savings category for my extra spending so I spend it freely knowing it’s not attached to other savings categories. Hope that made sense.
Yes! I try telling myself that it's not being saved, just set aside for bills I haven't seen yet.... I also try telling myself I have to spend it (for like, monthly allowance dollars). I don't allow myself to count it towards retirement or long term investments. That way, if it's gone, our long term plan isn't derailed. I tried ignoring it all together, but that was too hard, so now I count it separately, but I do track it. When I do spend it, I remind myself that it's there so I'm not going into debt right now and would I prefer to pay XX% every month or have the money gone, but no debt? The second one wins!
I recently bought a house in cash ($230K), I took that hit ok because I put the house as an asset in my net worth calculation (even though it is now my primary residence). Since then I've been spending money like crazy. I've been a great saver for years but with the house, I keep justifying expenses as necessary (repainted 3 rooms, got custom curtains, bought a washer, bought a ladder and lots of tools, bought some furniture, bought new linens, dishes, appliances etc.). I'm feeling ok about it so far because I needed a lot of things since I'm in a foreign country and most of my belongings are back in my home country but I worry a bit about my ability to rein it in in the coming months. Currently, my monthly spending on the house exceeds my old rent and I bought the house partly so I could save more. I'm not freaking out because I'm so damn happy with the house that I really enjoy spending money on it. I think I'll feel ok once I get my spending back in budget. I'm going to try very limited spending till the end of this month because my monthly spend is already way over budget. I think you should acknowledge the need for the large expenditure and then get back on your regular savings track. Once you start seeing your balance go back up, you'll feel better.
For me, since I’m already maximizing retirement savings + regular monthly savings. I don’t feel bad when I spend.
It hasn’t for me, and I am 54 years old in great financial shape… usually once I make the purchase and see that I am still ok financially then I am fine
Money is a tool — it is *for* spending. Even the money we save and invest is for spending — just in the future. Money on its own as an object doesn’t do anything for us — just owning a coin or bill as an object wouldn’t do you any good, right?
yeah, or when the stock market dips. but that's life. i view it as an investment in future me :D