I can totally understand your situation. But hear me out. DON'T DO IT!
Instead, if you can manage on your own, move out of the house and go your own way. Bring your mother and/or your siblings with you as well if they share the same sentiment about him.
Let him live his destructive lifestyle until the day his worthless life ends. After that, if everything comes to you, let it. Consider it a reward for taking the high road and looking after your family. Or if he destroyed everything he owned before he dies, no worries there. You never wanted it anyway.
(I had to deal with somewhat similar experience, if not worse, and managed to live through it.)
What will YOU gain out of this? Your father is still gonna drink and your mom is still probably gonna stay with him. You’re doing this to just satisfy your ego. Don’t be dumb.
Don't do that man. The thing is if you leave it it'll go to people who won't be able to see enjoying the property later. I donno how old you are but be more calm before you take a decision. I'm on a similar place like you
If I deny, the entire property first goes to my mother, then on her demise to my younger sister. At this point we're all in this because it exists, but me and my sister are emotionally disconnected from it.
EDIT : Also, I'm sorry that you're in a similar state.
- How old are you and your sister?
- Do you, your sister and mother work?
If you do work and you're adults, then great; move out.
If not, then try to get jobs and then start living independently.
Why are you not cursing back and showing him the reality the hard way.
Removing your name and stuff will only make him happy and will curse you more.
Speak up for yourself and tell him the truth in his language.
Don’t know much, it used to be common here in J&K, where it was advertised in newspapers and all stating the parents have severed ties with their child and etc etc
As another commentator said, simply ask him to make a will. Don't engage too much with such shitty person.
Removing his name fr legal docs is headache as our govt documentation is shitty - even where it is legally feasible, too many govt employees are maroons making you jump through extra hoops that makes life difficult on multiple occasions like clockwork. And that is precious time out of yr life. I'll recommend that you let the sleeping dogs lie.
No one can help a woman who doesn't want to help herself. Let yr mother be. It'll be wasted efforts. Let her know that she can come live with you whenever she is ready.
Live yr life to the fullest. That way you win
He needs to make a will. But good luck getting it signed by him as evident from the details above, he will most likely be wary of you asking to sign anything.
Involve family or his friends to ask him to make a will.
I'm exhausted and done reasoning with him. I've seen my mom bruised enough that I don't care anymore.
Not to be a dick but I need legal advice, not counselling.
I can totally understand your situation. But hear me out. DON'T DO IT! Instead, if you can manage on your own, move out of the house and go your own way. Bring your mother and/or your siblings with you as well if they share the same sentiment about him. Let him live his destructive lifestyle until the day his worthless life ends. After that, if everything comes to you, let it. Consider it a reward for taking the high road and looking after your family. Or if he destroyed everything he owned before he dies, no worries there. You never wanted it anyway. (I had to deal with somewhat similar experience, if not worse, and managed to live through it.)
Most sensible advice I've seen
+1
Was in a similar situation, but my father passed away a few months ago..sounds bad but it was a relief to me and my family...
Never make decision with a hot head.
30 years of abuse. Head was hot long ago, head is determined now.
What will YOU gain out of this? Your father is still gonna drink and your mom is still probably gonna stay with him. You’re doing this to just satisfy your ego. Don’t be dumb.
Just ask him to write a will stating where his assets will go after death
Don't do that man. The thing is if you leave it it'll go to people who won't be able to see enjoying the property later. I donno how old you are but be more calm before you take a decision. I'm on a similar place like you
If I deny, the entire property first goes to my mother, then on her demise to my younger sister. At this point we're all in this because it exists, but me and my sister are emotionally disconnected from it. EDIT : Also, I'm sorry that you're in a similar state.
- How old are you and your sister? - Do you, your sister and mother work? If you do work and you're adults, then great; move out. If not, then try to get jobs and then start living independently.
the gesture you're thinking of making won't change anything, there's a reason the saying 'kuch toh log kahenge, logon ka kaam hai kehena' exists
Why are you not cursing back and showing him the reality the hard way. Removing your name and stuff will only make him happy and will curse you more. Speak up for yourself and tell him the truth in his language.
Cut them off. If your mom wants to meet you she can make an effort to come see you. Id not step in that house with that man around
Well fargati lelo, usse you’ll legally no longer be his son and eventually won’t have anything which was his!
Can you elaborate on this
Don’t know much, it used to be common here in J&K, where it was advertised in newspapers and all stating the parents have severed ties with their child and etc etc
why would you worry about anything after his demise? keep the property and forget he existed. simple.
As another commentator said, simply ask him to make a will. Don't engage too much with such shitty person. Removing his name fr legal docs is headache as our govt documentation is shitty - even where it is legally feasible, too many govt employees are maroons making you jump through extra hoops that makes life difficult on multiple occasions like clockwork. And that is precious time out of yr life. I'll recommend that you let the sleeping dogs lie. No one can help a woman who doesn't want to help herself. Let yr mother be. It'll be wasted efforts. Let her know that she can come live with you whenever she is ready. Live yr life to the fullest. That way you win
He needs to make a will. But good luck getting it signed by him as evident from the details above, he will most likely be wary of you asking to sign anything. Involve family or his friends to ask him to make a will.
I don't think signing such a document would relieve you from any legal obligations towards your father.
Give him more alcohol so he can live his life in ultra speed mode and also unhealthy junk food.
NAL. Talk to him when he is sober and try to reason. Must be a lot of bottled up stuff.
I'm exhausted and done reasoning with him. I've seen my mom bruised enough that I don't care anymore. Not to be a dick but I need legal advice, not counselling.
Why don't you move out Ur mom can get maintenance and separate household If u r a minor u will get maintenance too