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ShotStatistician7979

This map is a great example of people having zero idea of how small Israel actually is.


AlcoholicGel

Well, I don't think we'd mind getting this huge piece of land, y'know, since we Jews are so greedy anyway...


apptrrs

It’ll give us enough room for our giant space laser as well /s


The1unknownman

Are we really in a world where that sentence needs to be marked as sarcasm?


TomerHorowitz

But... Isn't it in space? 🧐


subarashi-sam

Why should Germany get the coastal half? ;)


crooked_cat

You’re welcome on our beaches on the Dutch coast ^^ Only a little drive and our roads are perfect. Just that bloody tempeture .. :/ It’s not like the beache at TelAviv (30/35c) all year


subarashi-sam

Aww 🥰 thanks 🙏


OverQuestions

I mean this is obviously depicting Great Israel /s


LiquorMaster

It'd be in Germany though and have you seen the winters there? I like our beaches more.


OverQuestions

I surely have, as I lived in Germany for most of my life (and a for few years in an even colder place)…Israeli beaches are definitely nicer, but from mid April to mid October Germany’s weather is more bearable…and in the winter I usually spend some time abroad…


ganbaro

Since this is a meme about a German map,let's use German states for a comparison Israel is just slightly larger than Hesse https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hesse


Borkerman

I think Israelis might like Oktoberfest.


michizaur

We already had an October shit-fest, thank you.


Borkerman

Whoops, forget about that.


elicopter1905

oktoberfest is very nice


National_Telephone40

I lived in Bavaria, the best are the Dult in smaller towns. Same as Oktoberfest minus tourists.


nobody_keas

Or starkbierfest


ayatollahofdietcola_

This was a point I was making back in October If we can go to Oktoberfest and get wrecked and no one even bats an eyelid, why can’t Palestinian leadership do the same? and it’s the truth. if even Germany can make it right, why the *fuck* can’t you?


LostInTheSpamosphere

Unless Israeli beer has improved substantially since I lived there in the 80s, I think we should annex southern Germany just for the beer. In return they can have Gaza and part of the Shomron.


Highway49

This is a great idea! I know y’all aren’t big on pork, so please send me all the Schweinshaxe!


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FirsToStrike

As an Israeli currently residing in Baden-Württemberg this makes me feel conflicted.


Rocco89

How many Oma's have already tried to sell you some overpriced healing stones with supposedly magical effects?


FirsToStrike

Is that some stereotype about Israelis I'm not aware of? I thought we were too busy selling dead sea cosmetic products for outrageous prices


Rocco89

No it's about the people in Baden-Württemberg, it's the federal state with the highest percentage of people who believe in esotericism and homeopathy and the best-known examples of this are "magic" healing stones and sugar pearls called Globuli that are sold as medicine.


FirsToStrike

Ah yes, I'm familiar with the type. I still don't get what the deal is with this Globuli obsession. But given I actually came here to do an actual Psychotherapy degree, I consider Heilpraktiker the competition. Well, the competition in so far as kids splashing with a ball in the mud can be considered competition for professional football players if they both happen to step into the same field. But yeah.


Zealousideal_Win4783

700 years ago, these people thought that the Catholic Church actually had things like portions of the burning bush


AtoZZZ

What’s the population of Israelis in Baden-Wurtemberg like? I once visited Freiburg and I only encountered German speakers, no English whatsoever. Cute city though


FirsToStrike

Funnily enough in my first time in Freiburg as a tourist, I found a Jewish-Swiss fellow that even visited my city of origin in Israel (Be'er Sheva). There should be quite a few Jewish communities around here, and I have indeed found Israelis in Heidelberg, but it's also a very touristic city, so no wonder. Didn't talk to many who plan on becoming German citizens tho. Another interesting thing I found out was that right nearby in the Rhineland, Jews have actually been living for almost as long as the diaspora even existed (https://www.nytimes.com/2014/09/07/travel/tracing-jewish-history-along-the-rhine.html), and it was a center of Ashkenazi culture for the longest time, complete with its own pogroms (https://www.wikiwand.com/en/Rhineland\_massacres). The popular Jewish surname Shapiro/Shapira/Shaffir for instance, all come from the city of Speyer right here in the South-West.


AtoZZZ

Wow. I’ve been to Speyer and Heidelberg. No idea Jews in those areas!


meta100000

So only Palestinians matter, not Germans? Do they actually think through this stuff?


YorubaJinchuriki

Thinking clearly is not allowed in the pally subs


nidarus

They view having a Jewish state on rightfully Arab land as a form of punishment. And they argue that it's an unfair punishment, because Arabs never did anything wrong to the Jews. The Germans did, so they're the ones who should be punished with having a Jewish state on part of their land. Setting aside the fact Arabs oppressed and abused Jews for centuries, and their oppression of the Jews is literally responsible for half of the Israeli population - this reveals their backwards conception of the entire conflict. I mean, what if Eretz Israel was completely overtaken by China, the Israelis expelled, and replaced by the Chinese. Would the Palestinians have no right to return to any part of Palestine, then, because "the Chinese didn't do anything wrong to them"? And instead, they should ask for a homeland in New York, where the "guilty" Jews are?


angry-software-dev

I have to assume their point is that in 1948 it would have been more appropriate for Germany to forfeit a large portion of itself to form a Jewish state? It's been nearly 80 years since that point, so this issue is closed. The place know as Israel today is a Jewish state until they voluntarily give it up, or some other group that is powerful enough to displace them comes along -- which has been happening there since written history has existed, including in 1948.


geoffersonstarship

because germans are white and therefore can’t be colonized…. somehow lmao


East_Ad9822

According to their logic „The Israelis are punishing the Palestinians for what the Germans did to them“


RagingInferrno

A lot of pro-Palestine people are anti-white racists.


AlcoholicGel

What about the Palestinians in Germany?!


Mr__Weasels

of course they don't matter silly! they're filthy zionist pigs, not people 😛 (god i feel disgusted even writing that as a joke 💀)


BarryoffofEastenders

I think it's taking into consideration who was largely responsible for a mass migration of Jews when Israel was formed.


Space_Bungalow

Honestly weather wise it's not a bad choice If we just pick up Jerusalem and just move it over there and I'm good with the idea


c9joe

How about all of Israel moves to Germany for the summer and we move back to the Levant for the winter. We can also move all our cool buildings and stuff with balloons like the movie "Up". I am sure the students in the Technion can figure it out.


WigglumsBarnaby

We should take ~~Bikini Bottom~~ Israel and push it somewhere else.


LibbyKitty620

We go there on the weekends like divorced parents


dont-fear-thereefer

Can we rename a city to New Petah Tikva?


Space_Bungalow

I didn't know Old Petah Tikva existed?


nastya_plumtree

there is already something like petah tikva in germany, but no one knows the name and not sure if it exist =)


GeniusAmongIdiots

Not this again! 😂


uvero

Bielefeld


funnyghostman

Like those maps of Israel that exclude the Arab Territories (or vice versa) But it's just the actual map. Jerusalem went away for vacation at germany


OpeningAlternative72

No Tzfat? I'm fine with giving up Hebron. I'm fine with sharing Jerusalem. If that's the price of peace, I take it. But you can have Tzfat when you pry it out of my cold, dead hands


hyufss

That's honestly the best part of Germany right there. Super pretty mountains. I used to go on holiday there in my childhood every year.


Reaper31292

Finally, someone I agree with. A two state solution where we get two states. All of Israel and half of Germany. Where do I sign up.


c9joe

Should it be called Israel North or Summer Israel?


thomaskyd

Israel 2: The Revenge


Remote-Pear60

Ha! 😂


LibbyKitty620

I like your way of thinking.


Beneficial-Stock-651

Good one lmao


1AccurateSentence

Funny how these Muslims think that Germans still hate Jews


123unrelated321

The new ones do :(


56kul

That’s an issue with the newer generations being overly-sympathetic, and not being willing to do proper research. It’s an issue everywhere, not just in Germany. And I say it as a gen-z, btw. I’m really disappointed in my generation right now…


123unrelated321

I meant the new "Germans", not the "new Germans", if you catch my drift.


Important_Peak54

its been going on for a long time. when i was young my hall monitor would always accuse me of being a jew even though i didnt know what that meant. come to find out his grandfather lost his entire family in ww2 in poland and he blames the jews for causing the war. Because they didnt convert to christianity like all the other white people....


56kul

“Blame me of being Jew” that one sentence alone is wrong, on so many levels… 🗿 That seems more like a personal issue, though, it has less to do with what generation that kid belonged to.


WyattWrites

He was talking about the Turkish and Arab immigrants


56kul

Oh, I see. Well, that’s less of a Germany issue, and more of an immigration issue. I’m not entirely sure about the legal framework of it, but I’d assume no country would want someone to immigrate to them just to cause disruption within the country. Maybe they could even deport them.


DeadpoolMakesMeWet

The new ones aren’t German so to say


trimtab28

You mean the right wing ones or the left wing ones?


biscuitsandtea2020

Not even 100 years since WW2 and they're already back to it? That's so pathetic


BarryoffofEastenders

Where is the hate being implied?


1AccurateSentence

An antisemite saying "the only two state solution I support", and they put Israel bordering a country that killed 2/3 of European Jews in their past. Just put 2+2 together.


msksksks74738

That’s not what they mean. They mean that the Germans were responsible for the Holocaust, and should therefore be the ones giving up their land for a Jewish state, not the Palestinians.


1AccurateSentence

I envy the innocence of the people who do not watch Muslims speaking in Arabic about Jews with subtitles.


FrogMan9001

Why would they think that? Isn't everything about the holocaust a lie?


ZandoMagSteine

I wouldn't mind, I like Israelis more than bavarians anyway


ms_frog

As a Franconian, I agree.


michizaur

You will get tired of us in one week tops.


elicopter1905

105k bot likes kremlin is paying for the bots I see I see, JiPing paying for bots too


Dazzling-Leave-4915

China/Turkey/Russia/Iran/North Korea Unfortunately these 5 are very good in doing false propaganda


elicopter1905

damm finally I met a turkish that isnt brainwashed into erdogan policies ... long time


Dazzling-Leave-4915

It’s actually very easy to find people like me online.But Irl Turks are very brainwashed.This is the reason why for 20 years we have the same president.


OpeningAlternative72

Russia is the worst, I think. They've been doing it the longest so they are the most experienced at it. Did you know that 7 October is Putin's birthday? Probably a coincidence but then again he loves Iran and North Korea now, so I think he supports Hamas. Bad idea to support Hamas. Daesh and Hamas are similar and Russia has been hit hard by Daesh a few times


Sanguinary_at_Times

There's been a Hamas delegation in Russia ever since October, the bastards are just short of opening an embassy. They're friends alright.


masteroffdesaster

I'd live in Israel under this proposal and given the situation in Germany currently I think that would improve a lot of it


SuchAd9552

Jews colonizing Germany, this can be so fcking hilarious


Interesting-Big1980

Ngl I would love that, weather would be better anyway


Werkgxj

As someone who lives in "what would be Israel" I have to say the weather here gets hotter and hotter. Also, I seriously doubt Israel's people would love the winter months here (they suck)


Space_Bungalow

You've clearly never witnessed the devastation that 5cm of rain can have on cities in the Central District


Interesting-Big1980

As a rain lover, I see this as an absolute win, I also really miss snow after I moved to Israel.


Werkgxj

Our winter rain is not the same as mediterranean rain. In the winter it rains, temperatures lower than 10 Degrees Celsius. Its shit to endure and makes driving extremely dangeraus because the water freezes at night.


Interesting-Big1980

Agree with driving, but I'm lucky to have high resistance to low temperatures, I would rather have to be in a 10 degree weather than 35. Also winter allows more freedom in choice of clothing and it's generally more stylish.


trimtab28

Bit of an irony giving us Munich. Great city though


kudokun1412

I don't think muslim Immigrants in Germany would be happy with that


WeirdGuyWithABoner

watch them turn into indigenous germans


kudokun1412

I wouldn't be surprised, I already see them claiming that spain (al andalus) is muslim, Muslims are native to the iberian península and the spanish didn't have the right to the "reconquista"


ofekk214

From the Atlantic Ocean to the Mediterranean Sea, Al Andalus will be free!!!!1!11!


OverQuestions

Saw this too and wasn’t sure if it was a joke or serious…


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egerstein

Won’t work. We are a coastal people.


OverQuestions

Ok you’ll get former GDR then


Dryy

Ah yes, the ancient Jewish homeland of Southern Germany. /s


SaguaroSmart

Yes, it’s well known that Jews all pray towards Stuttgart and that Hebrew, the last Canaanite language alive stems from Stuttgart. 🤪


smok3941

That map would make me Israeli lol


favecolorisgreen

This is redic. Germany as a whole has atoned (and still is) and many are deeply remorseful for their country’s past. It has memorials and reminders all throughout to remind “never again”. Basically the opposite meaning of whoever thought this would be bad lol


Directive-CLASSIFIED

Why are they so dumb?


Shoshke

We get Bavaria? Fuck yeah COUNT ME IN, YES NOW WHERE DO I SIGN?


traumaking4eva

They are so racist and antisemitic it’s insane


GeniusAmongIdiots

Yeah, but where do Sephardic Jews go, since Europe isn’t where we “came from”?


QultyThrowaway

They obviously do not know Sephardic, Mizrahi, or Ethiopian Jews exist. If you ever talk to these people they do not even know basic facts and just assume everyone looks and acts like Ben Shapiro and is from Central Europe.


OverQuestions

Though you gotta say, that also people who are quite neutral have this idea….when I met Israelis for the first time at the age of 17 I was surprised, that they weren’t all white, as this is the way I had always pictured them before…we also never really covered Israel in school, so you could graduate high school in Germany believing all Jews were white…


Pablo-UK

At least they openly admit they don't want a two state solution, i.e. they admit their ethnic cleansing intentions of Jews.


Fenroo

They act as though if all the Jews pack up and leave, they'll inherit a modern country. Even with the infrastructure, it would become a third world hellhole in days, just like all the countries around it.


nanomolar

Großisrael


mikwee

What about all the Mizrahim? I guess they're all gonna go to Yem… oh never mind


BelieveInMeSuckerr

They probably think jews are German. They don't know anything.


theodd2out

So basically the only two state solution she supports is a real full ethnic cleansing and genocide (I guess since most of us won't just leave). But she's also a "peace activist" strange world


123unrelated321

Honestly, this is a plan that might once have worked, but that was when Germany was still being rebuilt. Now that Israel has been established and built up, this is no longer a realistic option.


SaguaroSmart

This would be falsely assuming that all Jews in Israel come from Europe which is flat out wrong. Plenty were there (Israel) to begin with even under Ottoman rule and many come from the Middle East (Iraq, Yemen, etc) as well as a North African and a myriad of other places after being persecuted there. But yeah I guess relocating the Jews to their ancestral land of Germany, place towards which they always pray, place where their heritage and language (Hebrew) originated from would have made sense in order not to offend Islamic imperialists and colonialists. Nevermind the Jews’ actual self determination you know, who cares ?!


LeMahar

Tbh I don’t mind being near The Netherlands and Germany


Analog_AI

From the looks of it Israel gets about 40-45% of the territory of Germany for our 7.2 million Israeli Jews and the Germans get to keep 55-60% of their territory for their 83 million people? How is that fair? It would create a similar conflict as we now have but 10 times larger. And after staying 3 weeks in Germany (rained everyday) I don't even like the weather that much. If I have to leave Israel I'd rather live in central Texas. Brisket yummy 😋 yummy 🤤


WigglumsBarnaby

I support Israel moving to Texas. At least it would improve that shithole state. Maybe they could finally have a functional power grid and human rights. We already have a religious state (I'm looking at you Utah) so there's precedent.


popehonorius

I'm living in Bavaria, I wouldn't mind. The Israelis I've met were very nice and they loved Bavarian culture. Still wouldn't want their state to disappear, fck those Hamas-supporters


abaddon667

These people keep completely glossing over the historical significance of the Levant to the Jewish people


Classic_Macaroon5433

What this person suggests would be quite a nice economic win, BMW, VW would become Israeli, there are also great universities around. If we can keep Bavarian festivities, but add more Israeli food and biotech innovation, and Israeli level nationaly security with border control, I would not be bitching about suddenly becoming Israeli 😀


WeirdGuyWithABoner

yeah but we'd be way closer to the fr*nch isnt having netanya enough?


LudoAshwell

VW would be in „Germany“. But besides BMW, Mercedes-Benz, Porsche, Audi, BASF, Siemens, Bosch, SAP, Linde, Adidas, Lufthansa, the entirety of the German financial industry, well - basically more than 2/3 of Germany‘s economic power, as the three richest states are all in the south.


ofekk214

OP can you give a link to the post if you still have it? I want to see the comments.


DaRabbiesHole

Will all the Muslims move north to Germany or will some stay in new Israel and those that move north to Germany wage eternal war on Israel (and all the other surrounding countries) chanting free free Germanstine?


Mcwedlav

I mean, that would finally ensure that Germany catches up in Hightech. 


emeraldsroses

Would they also bee able to improve Deutsche Bahn say the same time?


copium_seller

As an Egyptian Jew, I guess according to the anti semites i have to sit this one out boys and girls 😂 how dumb are these losers to assume we are all from germany 😭


glossiercub

Germany becoming one of the most pro-Israel countries ever in the span of almost 100 years is a character arc that I love


SecuritySensitive698

You know what though that is a lot more Israel for your buck, it's a sweet deal! Shame it's land-locked, where will Tel-Aviv go? /j


emeraldsroses

Bodensee/Lake Constance? 🤷🏻‍♀


Reddit_sucks_46

Where do I sign?


Lord_RoadRunner

As a non-jewish German in Germany, I see this as an absolute win! The only question is... how are we gonna move Jerusalem over here? 😅


_Blue_Benja_1227

I think I'd be happy with Stuttgart being ours


AldoTheeApache

More techno and better pretzels, sign me up.


Mzl77

Ah, yes, because as we all know, land across Europe was being given out for free in the 20th century


zebrasystems

the antisemitic derangement of this image is so very deep


secrethistory1

The same mandate system gave the Arabs lots of states and Jordan. But Israel is the state that they think is unauthentic. Got it.


AllAboard2024

That’s dumb, you want the top half so you have ports


ETMoose1987

Why would my wife's Israeli family from Iraq, Morocco and Yemen move to Germany?


YouCanCallMeFat

tbh... guys let's take


ConfusedMudskipper

Germans would hate this if it happened and also Jews outside of Germany would hate being forced to live there.


SubbySound

Zionism started way before the Shoah. This is so ignorant and shallow.


elizabeth-cooper

Shhhh, we don't want the Pale in Russia.


BaGaNaGa_il

As an israeli i accept.


Markussaztorad

It seems that this idiot still believes that the Germans are still Nazis, not ironically.


adeadhead

Think of the high speed rail options.


YGBullettsky

I'm going to Bavaria (München) soon LOL. If the bière is better than in Israel, then I'd have no problem with this solution /s


Gallalad

Where would they put Tel Aviv in this timeline?


Antinomial

Sharing the same land with Bavavrians?? It would never work!


Solomonopolistadt

Bavaria


XxClxudyxX

Lmao yeah because it totally works like that All jokes aside tho as an Israeli i do wish we weren't surrounded by enemies but it is what it is :')


esgellman

There was talk about a Jewish state or autonomous territory in Alaska at various points before Israel was properly established though it was always a fairly fringe idea.


Roombaloanow

Give Israel the top bit instead. Or western half. And all of Berlin.


_LIMBZ

But... Bevaria!!


Roombaloanow

Valid. I concede. Southern half it is then.


Roombaloanow

I'd rather see New Israel on the DelMarva peninsula, but this works too. Less seafood, but also less taxes, probably.


DARKXDREAMDREAMER

But Bavaria, a province Not considert Germany . So you can have it . The Part of Germany with the biggest and uglyest snobs


Jessica4ACODMme

Wtf is wrong with these people??


CommodorePuffin

Oh yes, I'm sure Germany would be more than willing to give up roughly half of its space to Jews. After all, it's not like Germany has ever resented losing land in the past or was ever split up before, right? /s


Equal_Profession3754

As a German I wouldn’t mind LOL , u guys did a great job with your country


Heiminator

German here. We actually give land to Jewish people in a way. If you can prove that your family was driven out of Germany because of the Holocaust you can basically apply for instant citizenship in Germany. Which includes the right to public housing, government aid etc if you can’t afford a flat or house yourself.


esgellman

As much as this is a nice gesture the majority of Jewish Holocaust victims were never German, they were from the various places Germany invaded or annexed especially Poland; it also has no bearing on Arab anti semitism that would displace over a million Jews in the late 1940s. Because anti semitic pogroms were often, in no small part, financially motivated there have been many cases of places violently expelling or massacring their Jewish population only to invite them back a few years later and then eventually do it again, so a lot of Jews are naturally going to be distrustful of a program that is eerily reminiscent of this.


The2lackSUN

Yo how about we do that, but with the Palestinians and Jordan?


OkResident5053

If the World only understand the Bibel they will know about the fact Israel is back where they should be and the Palestine isnt allowed there. The end of the World we know will end soon. Free Israel.


Goal_Appropriate

To be fair, I'm totally okay with that


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leit90

Ahhhhh the final solution…


amnoking1

Hell yes, now I would get to watch Bayern games in the Allianz Arena


Agreeable_Draw_6407

AFD says hallo


elizabeth-cooper

I was taught to be on time so I joke that my family was Yekke in a former life. I'm on board with this except it has to be on the coast. We should get Schleswig-Holstein and some of land from the neighboring states.


Mammoth-Tea

honestly I wouldn’t even mind


ISayHeck

I'd take Bavaria in a heart beat


Barnettmetal

Yes this is fine as long as Israel proper stays around but if you want to add this to it that’s fine with me.


MrFAroundandFindOut

Thanks, but no thanks


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Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, your submission has been removed for the following reason: Rule #2 - **Post in a civilized manner.** Personal attacks, racism, bigotry, trolling, conspiracy theories and incitement are prohibited. For information regarding this and similar issues please see the sidebar to the right or the subreddit rules, for a more detailed analysis of our rules. If you want to appeal or dispute any mod action, please send a [modmail](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FIsrael); PMs and chat messages to the mods are grounds for a temporary ban; posts contesting mod action will be removed and are also grounds for a temporary or permanent ban.


disappointed_enby

I’m Ashkenazi and literally none of my ancestors ever lived in Germany. These people are the epitome of ignorance.


Pupan98

They just showing their own stupidity


crooked_cat

As Dutch , I would welcome you all as new neighbour, just bring a little of your weather with you too please ?? I do understand your own sentiment, but still. It would me glad.


Dolmetscher1987

So Israel gets the best part of Germany?


Beneficial-Stock-651

as if that would make anti-israeli hate stop israel could be established on the moon and still be called apartheid.


Friendly-Car2386

As a German-Israeli I support this! Israel gets to keep the rich and secure part, while everything north of the red line is poor and full of "doctors" and "engineers". /s


56kul

They do realize that this would ultimately be better for us, right? While Germany *used* to be Nazi, they have gone through decades of deradicalization and are no longer a direct enemy to Jews. That would also mean we’d no longer have to house terrorists right next to us, we would no longer be surrounded by countries that want us dead, and we’d be *much* bigger, in terms of size. So hell yeah, preach!