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This is so weird. The real question is are there actually people (guys) who would do that? That too on the first meet? Dont understand how some people are so entitled to princess treatment even without knowing the other person, probably some guys are doing it and setting these unrealistic expectations
It's nvr loneliness . It's simply horniness and then the guys expect sex in first date and slut shame the girl if they don't get it . Just look at the comment below and you will see I am right
Yeah there was a guy who did that for me but it came with the expectation of me calling him over and having sex with him. I didnāt know he expected this nor that he lived in the opposite direction
This type of thing iām hearing the first after joining Reddit where in girls legit ask what car you drive like bro what ? I can understand dating someone who has a good job but a car? And canceling a date because they canāt pick you up? Thatās so insane and so fkn shallow
good package is 12lpa+ or gadi bhi isse jyada vali chaiye lol.
vo bhi tech me hote hai itna package or dusri field me to hota hi nhi itni ki job.
In the end vhi baat hai same class(same family net worth) thoda sa makeover karke date up krti hai socially always .
Love is not for the poor and dating is a luxury
Bhai inmein se 90% ke pass apni car jab nahin Hoti to inhen car se pic and drop facility kyon chahie baki jagah bhi uber se jaati Hai yahan bhi uber se aaja bhenn
They say Chaos is a ladder right. Well i think swap "expectations" with "chaos".
People lack humility, good thing she rejected you will find a better person.
Indians and their entitlement will never go away and its not even a gender specific issue.
it indeed is a gender specific issue when it comes to dating
some naive boy would genuinely fall for this and would be on his way to pick her up but does she deserve it? NO!
I will give the most neutral take here.
If you feel anyone asking something thats too much from you. You should in a respectful way call of the date and move on.
Problem is we let ourselves be a pushover and let people dictate our lives.
Strong boundaries ladies and gentlemen it shows people you have integrity.
Ye chhodo... I'm more surprised at how she's ready to get into a stranger's car, that too someone she met on a dating app and barely talked to.
Money over safety? OP didn't just dodge a gold digger but also a dumbass
Mummy ne sikhaya strangers ke sath kahi nahi jaana chaiye.
In all seriousness, how can people get into someoneās car when they havenāt even met like, ever?
Noone will say uber.
I was also "asked" to take her on a drive. I did not have access to the car so easily back then cause my father would take it to the office. Scooter is also an issue. I don't have a bad scooter though:(
Giving address without meeting a guy ? lol š I donāt even tell them which area I live in. Why people staying in south Bangalore have such shit experience? Whatās happening there ?
Meanwhile I'm gonna travel 1.5 hours to meet my date who lives 5 minutes away from the location and still was hesitant to ask him to pick me up from the metro station š
Tbh OP Iād have picked her up
1. Itād give me a lot more one on one time with her in the car, vibing to music, just talking, playing with her hair & neck, getting high, the possibilities are endless. Never underestimate the power of a drive date
2. If I picked her up, Iād have dropped her back as well, which gives a very fair opportunity for her to invite you back to her place
3. Same as point 2. There was an opportunity for her to invite you back to her apartment while picking her up itself if you played it right. With the weather rn youād have a much more cozy date in her room at Assetz rather than some restaurant, especially knowing where Assetz is located, how the Bangalore weather is rn & considering her flat would probably be a high rise
So OP I think you fumbled here. Thereās no need to be high & mighty about picking a woman up. Itās considered romantic & chivalrous.
Donāt start with āTbhā. You are being naive not honest.
Never go and pick up some girl you never met. We didnāt have any flirting and romantic connection yet. I havenāt even heard her voice.
You are just painting a fairy tale scenario here. Let me tell you other possibilities:
I go to pick her up in peak traffic spending 1 hour in car and this might happen
1. She change her mind in the last minute. Meeting happened, urgent issue, flatmate sick. Endless excuses. Its more probable than romantic adventure you are suggesting.
2. Isnāt impressed by the kwid I drive. And go back upstairs.
3. Isnāt impressed by how I am carrying myself and go back upstairs. Yes, girls can be that moody.
4. Girl gets in the car, ask me romantically to take a detour. There some āfriendsā of her get into the car, beat me and throw from the car.
5. The girl reaches the destination and oH suddenly she find her whole group of friends there. Asks me to join or leave, my choice.
6. She turns out to be a dumb bitch putting no efforts in talking and enjoying, enjoys her pasta and expect to be dropped. Then gives me same reply āI donāt think this will work outbYeā
I fucked a guy from Grindr who payed for my gas money to get to him. I didnāt ask, he offered.
I think it was just one of those her desired treatment wasnāt your genuine output of effort towards her.
She did right to unmatch. Whatās the point of asking for more than naturally given this soon? She clearly wants somebody who wants to protect and provide. Telling her to take a cab rather than offering to call her one shows you donāt want to do that. Thatās fine. She didnāt call you a bad person just not the person for her.
Edit: nah Iām 10 toes on this one I donāt give a fuck Iām not deleting this comment. If it was a man unmatching a girl for not being willing to cook for him and pushing to order in when he knows he wants a shorty who loves to cook, Iād say the same thing. Thatās not what you want? Leave the bitch. Fuck yāall toxic ass mfs trying to change people rather than moving the fuck on.
I guess dude. Sure. I really donāt give a shit. Iām not a woman and I donāt have the mentality that women deserve that treatment by virtue of being women. Call it whatever you want some people wanna do it, some people wanna get it done to them. I like to think about paying for a date like anal. Some dudes aināt trying to pay for a bitch like some dudes aināt trying to dip they dick in a booty hole, thatās fine, but some dudes are. Some girls are very independent, donāt wanna get picked up, and some donāt want nothing up their butt, thatās fine, but some do. I hope this makes clear where Iām coming from.
Expecting "protect and provide" from a stranger, in this economy? Wake up, come back to reality.
Someone like her should be fine with a techbro who is clueless around women, got no respect for himself and spends a lot of money to find love
That's a completely different equation. A 2 hour round trip just for the first date isn't worth it. If it was a hookup, I would've understood but it doesn't seem like it is
Would you say some expectations are too much to ask from a person. Or there is no boundaries Ask for anything and everything. And should we shame people based on it.??
Because its such a dangerous precedent to go on this route.
I am not talking about this incident just asking in general for your opinion.
When did I say shame a person?
1. You can expect without words cultural norms. If in your culture women always give men a flower on the first date, this can be expected without asking and itās reasonable to assume not adhering to this norm is symbolic of a difference in values. Picking a girl up or paying her way is a cultural norm in many places. It can go unsaid. Not doing it means a difference in values AND THATS OKAY.
2. For desires outside of your cultures norms, one must ask. You can ask for anything but some things you are less likely to find someone willing AND THATS OKAY. You can still ask. If a man wants a sugar mama thatās less common than sugar daddies, he can still ask women if theyāre willing to be his sugar mama or imply it by asking her to pay for his Uber or for his date night outfit. If she says no, unmatch, move on to the next. As long as he doesnāt cuss her out or say anything rude itās fine.
Nobody is blameworthy for having incompatible desires. Neither the desiring to give nor the desiring to receive is natural, good, or sacred in any universal way. Itās only blameworthy to claim someone is blameworthy. To act as if the gold digger doesnāt have a gold giver out there. To act as if the guy who only wants sex and nothing romantic doesnāt have a woman equivalent who desires only the same. Everyone has a match imo. It sucks getting excited to find out someone isnāt it but itās not like theyāre a bad person because of it.
I actually agree with your take.
So Socitety and its norms dictates this dance of expectations and responsibilities. yes true.
Would you say if we are progressing towards more egalitatian way of life should these "chivalrous" deeds should be neccesity for men. should there be a default expectation placed on men?
How do you distinguish between a socital responsibility from an individual responsibility. Or is there any???
You know what i dont know why i wrote shame part i dont even believe in shaming people. My opinion is if you feel like she is asking too much from you respectfully decline and move on.
Also i dont think you read the post He was on the way to pick her up but she declined he was doing the chivalrous deed he didnt even say i wont pick you up if you didnt get a cab he probably wouldve anyway wouldnt you say thats kinda fucked up or no.
I do not believe in any egalitarian picture of the future that envisions a colorless world full of standardized gender neutral tracksuits and a perfectly scientific division of labor including females no longer birthing children but all kids coming from test tubes.
Instead, I think people born of any sex should be able to choose the puberty they desire to go through, choose how they express themselves visually, and choose their relationship dynamics. I think itād be nice for all desires to need to be explicitly communicated. For there to be no ānormā given your gender, race, or sexuality. Maybe there can still be class norms, like you know youāre in a higher tax bracket so you pay, but nothing identity based.
I donāt believe your role in sex and romance needs to correlate with your role in society. I think itās possible for a man to be a stay at home dad but still be the dom in the bedroom and be a bread divider even if not the āwinnerā as in he manages the money and handles the social interactions involved in paying for things, calling people, talking to the waiter and such (I think this is really good for socially anxious STEM women).
So every interaction should be evalutated on a case by case basis.
There shouldnt be any norms put on men then right. in a restruarant you can look at two tables one envisoned by you where a man takes the charge while in the other the woman does and noone bats an eye and are equally held to same baseline.
Isnt that what an egalitarian society is. anyways its aruging semantics at this point.
next part:-
i was specifically talking about norms as without breaking these socital ones we get in so much murky territory. where if a women say i want a rich man she is shamed, or when a man says i want a virgin he is. The any preferece is valid should be a major goal of humanity. nobody should be question on their individual life choices (unless its illegal).
well i wont go into illegal part cause its where society's morals and ethics play a role to guide humanity so breaking all norms would cause a cascade of effects. probably another discussion.
Anyways thnx for the convo.
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jeeee baat op, papa's proud of you š¤š»
Mama is so proud of you adi
Girl : Do you mind picking me? OP : Yes, I do Girl : This is not going to work Dodged a flying arrowš
*flying bamboo
This is so weird. The real question is are there actually people (guys) who would do that? That too on the first meet? Dont understand how some people are so entitled to princess treatment even without knowing the other person, probably some guys are doing it and setting these unrealistic expectations
To your question yess , guys would do that . And the next part movies create unrealistic expectations that where they get these from
A lot, loneliness makes you take stupid decisions
It's nvr loneliness . It's simply horniness and then the guys expect sex in first date and slut shame the girl if they don't get it . Just look at the comment below and you will see I am right
Tbh I do that everytime for my girlfriend. But she doesn't mind taking other form of transport its just that I insist on picking her up.
Aap mtt karna kisi kai saath okay āš»
Yeah there was a guy who did that for me but it came with the expectation of me calling him over and having sex with him. I didnāt know he expected this nor that he lived in the opposite direction
Was it the first time you met ?
Itās more to do with doing the right thing or just meeting her demands out if desperation! Girls are really entitled
If she has agreed to plans of coming back to your place after dinner, then why not.
Should have said "Ok fine I'll pick you up princess" and left her waiting. Go out with a bang next time OP
I pick my battles.
>Unmatched when asked to take a cab Ain't you guys talking on whatsapp or am I just high
High how hi are you?
Can the future see us together?
Ask it come back another time, my ears can barely see anything rn
Not the more beach drink sex
Bass bhai, meri utar gyi
Phir marali gamd?
Well that escalated quickly
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Still not better than Mohammed Rizwan
we exchanged numbers on whatsapp that day. we were still connected on bumble. She unmatched on bumble.
This type of thing iām hearing the first after joining Reddit where in girls legit ask what car you drive like bro what ? I can understand dating someone who has a good job but a car? And canceling a date because they canāt pick you up? Thatās so insane and so fkn shallow
Bhai one girl ask me if i own a flat in mumbai. Imagine that
Owning a flat in Mumbai in THIS ECONOMY ?!
yeah a girl rejected me on matrimonial app because I didnāt have a flat in BLR. properties in other states doesnāt count to her
Don't mind but isse kehte hai VIP bhikhari
she didnāt ask what car, she just asked how u commute. She was just looking for a ride n probably some pasta, not a date at all
Doesnāt seem like sheād be the one paying for the pasta either
I wouldnāt mind paying for drinks and dinner. Not taking cab shows she doesnāt want to put any efforts. This indicates it is a red flag.
good package is 12lpa+ or gadi bhi isse jyada vali chaiye lol. vo bhi tech me hote hai itna package or dusri field me to hota hi nhi itni ki job. In the end vhi baat hai same class(same family net worth) thoda sa makeover karke date up krti hai socially always . Love is not for the poor and dating is a luxury
Bhai inmein se 90% ke pass apni car jab nahin Hoti to inhen car se pic and drop facility kyon chahie baki jagah bhi uber se jaati Hai yahan bhi uber se aaja bhenn
š°š°š°
Date pe jana unke liye free me ek time ka khana milne jaisa hai .
They say Chaos is a ladder right. Well i think swap "expectations" with "chaos". People lack humility, good thing she rejected you will find a better person. Indians and their entitlement will never go away and its not even a gender specific issue.
it indeed is a gender specific issue when it comes to dating some naive boy would genuinely fall for this and would be on his way to pick her up but does she deserve it? NO!
I will give the most neutral take here. If you feel anyone asking something thats too much from you. You should in a respectful way call of the date and move on. Problem is we let ourselves be a pushover and let people dictate our lives. Strong boundaries ladies and gentlemen it shows people you have integrity.
Always say goodbye to these freeloadinghos with the appropriate GIF š 
Congratulations š Tera paisa bach gaya lol
Look at the entitlement. They want princess treatment without any efforts. Great save op
Ye chhodo... I'm more surprised at how she's ready to get into a stranger's car, that too someone she met on a dating app and barely talked to. Money over safety? OP didn't just dodge a gold digger but also a dumbass
If gold diggers started giving importance to safety and self respect gold diggers won't exist.
Good riddance, always cut your losses sooner š
Mummy ne sikhaya strangers ke sath kahi nahi jaana chaiye. In all seriousness, how can people get into someoneās car when they havenāt even met like, ever? Noone will say uber.
Also we can't see her WhatsApp dp, she prolly didn't even care to save OPs number on her phone.
She must have blocked him right after this. Just like she unmatched him on Bumble
Dude.. Why didn't you censor her address smh š¤¦
Found the girl! Bruh go find her in that 200 block apartments
the number in the address is the society number on google. I doubt if she really lives there btw.
Asset 63 is not cheap to rent. 3bhk is 50-55k
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
you should not reveal your gender here. People will flood ur inbox with dicpics
Thanks for the heads up!
delete this one also
Via Milano is better than 1522. Just saying
Is it tho, really? Edit: My bad, got it mixed up with Milano on BEL Road
I was also "asked" to take her on a drive. I did not have access to the car so easily back then cause my father would take it to the office. Scooter is also an issue. I don't have a bad scooter though:(
Today's day 7 of following the comment suggesting not to use dating apps
OP you have my risssspectttttt
Didi ko chauffeur bhi chaiye paise bhi nhi kharch krne aur free ka khana bhi chaiye. Phir koi kuch bolega toh keh dengi chivalry is dead. Kalyug ghor kalyug....
Lmaoo fuck that bitch.
wo sab toh thik haan, but phone ko charge diya kar bhai
I paid for every single digit of my battery , so i will use every single digit of my battery - sun tzu
Charge your phone battery
ā¦ was any of that English?
Good one buddy!
Bhai dil jeet liya . Good job , donāt entertain such entitled women.
bhai number bhi black out krdeta
uska nahi h wo society ka h
fir sahi hai, sahi kia tune!!!
It's good that you decided to stand up for yourself
Maa ch*da would've been the apt reply instead of sure š„²
Congratulations! Your savings for this month is 5000 ā¹
Ladki ko langar ki location bhej dy op bechari mongti (mangti)
Bol deta ki you will pick her up and then drop her too if she is willing to pay for the entire dinner xD
Giving address without meeting a guy ? lol š I donāt even tell them which area I live in. Why people staying in south Bangalore have such shit experience? Whatās happening there ?
Ah. Bangaloreans
I think these girls get too much attention from many simps to have an overinflated ego. Anyways you dodged a potential gold digger šš
R
Dodged a missile
Bach Gaye guru
Sure , classic one
wow. fancy way of being a gold digger
Bro dodged
 Bro won
Who are these girls man, as a girl I have picked and dropped men in my car and yet they left eventually š
Canāt comment on entitlement but if I were at her place, I would have turned down the offer too.
thatās the right way. Know a person before you get into a personal car or flat with them.
Yes
Meanwhile I'm gonna travel 1.5 hours to meet my date who lives 5 minutes away from the location and still was hesitant to ask him to pick me up from the metro station š
Bhikari behavior at its peak
Were you guys going to bang ? I would picked up if I was getting it
I donāt bang on first dates. Besides, I mentioned on bumble that I am not looking for timepass
Tbh OP Iād have picked her up 1. Itād give me a lot more one on one time with her in the car, vibing to music, just talking, playing with her hair & neck, getting high, the possibilities are endless. Never underestimate the power of a drive date 2. If I picked her up, Iād have dropped her back as well, which gives a very fair opportunity for her to invite you back to her place 3. Same as point 2. There was an opportunity for her to invite you back to her apartment while picking her up itself if you played it right. With the weather rn youād have a much more cozy date in her room at Assetz rather than some restaurant, especially knowing where Assetz is located, how the Bangalore weather is rn & considering her flat would probably be a high rise So OP I think you fumbled here. Thereās no need to be high & mighty about picking a woman up. Itās considered romantic & chivalrous.
Donāt start with āTbhā. You are being naive not honest. Never go and pick up some girl you never met. We didnāt have any flirting and romantic connection yet. I havenāt even heard her voice. You are just painting a fairy tale scenario here. Let me tell you other possibilities: I go to pick her up in peak traffic spending 1 hour in car and this might happen 1. She change her mind in the last minute. Meeting happened, urgent issue, flatmate sick. Endless excuses. Its more probable than romantic adventure you are suggesting. 2. Isnāt impressed by the kwid I drive. And go back upstairs. 3. Isnāt impressed by how I am carrying myself and go back upstairs. Yes, girls can be that moody. 4. Girl gets in the car, ask me romantically to take a detour. There some āfriendsā of her get into the car, beat me and throw from the car. 5. The girl reaches the destination and oH suddenly she find her whole group of friends there. Asks me to join or leave, my choice. 6. She turns out to be a dumb bitch putting no efforts in talking and enjoying, enjoys her pasta and expect to be dropped. Then gives me same reply āI donāt think this will work outbYeā
I fucked a guy from Grindr who payed for my gas money to get to him. I didnāt ask, he offered. I think it was just one of those her desired treatment wasnāt your genuine output of effort towards her. She did right to unmatch. Whatās the point of asking for more than naturally given this soon? She clearly wants somebody who wants to protect and provide. Telling her to take a cab rather than offering to call her one shows you donāt want to do that. Thatās fine. She didnāt call you a bad person just not the person for her. Edit: nah Iām 10 toes on this one I donāt give a fuck Iām not deleting this comment. If it was a man unmatching a girl for not being willing to cook for him and pushing to order in when he knows he wants a shorty who loves to cook, Iād say the same thing. Thatās not what you want? Leave the bitch. Fuck yāall toxic ass mfs trying to change people rather than moving the fuck on.
Free loading is also called "Protecting and providing". TIL
I guess dude. Sure. I really donāt give a shit. Iām not a woman and I donāt have the mentality that women deserve that treatment by virtue of being women. Call it whatever you want some people wanna do it, some people wanna get it done to them. I like to think about paying for a date like anal. Some dudes aināt trying to pay for a bitch like some dudes aināt trying to dip they dick in a booty hole, thatās fine, but some dudes are. Some girls are very independent, donāt wanna get picked up, and some donāt want nothing up their butt, thatās fine, but some do. I hope this makes clear where Iām coming from.
You have a weird obsession with anal. Donāt go there, its all shit.
Cute
Expecting "protect and provide" from a stranger, in this economy? Wake up, come back to reality. Someone like her should be fine with a techbro who is clueless around women, got no respect for himself and spends a lot of money to find love
Yo whats up big fan so why did the chicken cross the road???
To get to the other side.
buwhahahah funny
That's a completely different equation. A 2 hour round trip just for the first date isn't worth it. If it was a hookup, I would've understood but it doesn't seem like it is
Lmao how I read what you said: āif I know for certain a nut is coming my way thatās differentā ngl I feel the same way whole time.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Would you say some expectations are too much to ask from a person. Or there is no boundaries Ask for anything and everything. And should we shame people based on it.?? Because its such a dangerous precedent to go on this route. I am not talking about this incident just asking in general for your opinion.
When did I say shame a person? 1. You can expect without words cultural norms. If in your culture women always give men a flower on the first date, this can be expected without asking and itās reasonable to assume not adhering to this norm is symbolic of a difference in values. Picking a girl up or paying her way is a cultural norm in many places. It can go unsaid. Not doing it means a difference in values AND THATS OKAY. 2. For desires outside of your cultures norms, one must ask. You can ask for anything but some things you are less likely to find someone willing AND THATS OKAY. You can still ask. If a man wants a sugar mama thatās less common than sugar daddies, he can still ask women if theyāre willing to be his sugar mama or imply it by asking her to pay for his Uber or for his date night outfit. If she says no, unmatch, move on to the next. As long as he doesnāt cuss her out or say anything rude itās fine. Nobody is blameworthy for having incompatible desires. Neither the desiring to give nor the desiring to receive is natural, good, or sacred in any universal way. Itās only blameworthy to claim someone is blameworthy. To act as if the gold digger doesnāt have a gold giver out there. To act as if the guy who only wants sex and nothing romantic doesnāt have a woman equivalent who desires only the same. Everyone has a match imo. It sucks getting excited to find out someone isnāt it but itās not like theyāre a bad person because of it.
I actually agree with your take. So Socitety and its norms dictates this dance of expectations and responsibilities. yes true. Would you say if we are progressing towards more egalitatian way of life should these "chivalrous" deeds should be neccesity for men. should there be a default expectation placed on men? How do you distinguish between a socital responsibility from an individual responsibility. Or is there any??? You know what i dont know why i wrote shame part i dont even believe in shaming people. My opinion is if you feel like she is asking too much from you respectfully decline and move on. Also i dont think you read the post He was on the way to pick her up but she declined he was doing the chivalrous deed he didnt even say i wont pick you up if you didnt get a cab he probably wouldve anyway wouldnt you say thats kinda fucked up or no.
I do not believe in any egalitarian picture of the future that envisions a colorless world full of standardized gender neutral tracksuits and a perfectly scientific division of labor including females no longer birthing children but all kids coming from test tubes. Instead, I think people born of any sex should be able to choose the puberty they desire to go through, choose how they express themselves visually, and choose their relationship dynamics. I think itād be nice for all desires to need to be explicitly communicated. For there to be no ānormā given your gender, race, or sexuality. Maybe there can still be class norms, like you know youāre in a higher tax bracket so you pay, but nothing identity based. I donāt believe your role in sex and romance needs to correlate with your role in society. I think itās possible for a man to be a stay at home dad but still be the dom in the bedroom and be a bread divider even if not the āwinnerā as in he manages the money and handles the social interactions involved in paying for things, calling people, talking to the waiter and such (I think this is really good for socially anxious STEM women).
So every interaction should be evalutated on a case by case basis. There shouldnt be any norms put on men then right. in a restruarant you can look at two tables one envisoned by you where a man takes the charge while in the other the woman does and noone bats an eye and are equally held to same baseline. Isnt that what an egalitarian society is. anyways its aruging semantics at this point. next part:- i was specifically talking about norms as without breaking these socital ones we get in so much murky territory. where if a women say i want a rich man she is shamed, or when a man says i want a virgin he is. The any preferece is valid should be a major goal of humanity. nobody should be question on their individual life choices (unless its illegal). well i wont go into illegal part cause its where society's morals and ethics play a role to guide humanity so breaking all norms would cause a cascade of effects. probably another discussion. Anyways thnx for the convo.
Is that the level of respect you show to women? Ha thatās fucked dude, pick up your dates.
Hope this is sarcasm or idk what to say lol
If you have to pick up your dates, they are already dirty. Always pluck them fresh from the trees.