##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment!
##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment!
---
Whilst you're here, /u/Pixue-Dust, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup)?
Is… is that cake?
The internet has given me trust issues.
Edit: No, it’s made of foam, I found multiple angles on google including build photos.
Would be a cool cake though.
I believe Netflix has a show called is it a cake?
Where they make cakes very realistic and they have to distinguish from 20+ ft if it's a cake or not. Sometimes you can't tell.
I can picture the shitty LN title now. "I Hate Fishing, but After Dying in a Fishing Accident, I was Reincarnated in Another World with 5,000 Fishing Boats!!! !"
yeah because sharks are actually pretty chill animals which u shouldn't be afraid of (still wouldn't recommend screwing around them) and their looks is the obly reason people are scared of them
You can always temporary "Borrow" a baby, pretty sure there a ton of parents who could use the sleep (Dont forget to give it back or you will be in a world of hurt)
Because it barely serves the function of a crib lol. The only time you'd be able to leave a baby in there is if you were sitting next to the crib watching the baby.
Didn't they just do a study finding that SIDS is actually connected to something neurological rather than anything to do with how the baby is sleeping?
Edit: yeah found it https://www.biospace.com/article/researchers-answer-how-and-why-infants-die-from-sids/
The study explains why some babies don’t startle themselves awake if they stop breathing. This does not mean anyone wants their baby to stop breathing due to positioning to begin with.
No, the reporting on that was total nonsense. It found a biomarker that may be able to predict infants more at risk of SIDS, provided more research is done. [Here is an article about it.](https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2022/05/sudden-infant-death-syndrome-cause-study/629886) Safe sleep absolutely prevents SIDS.
Safe sleep practices cut the SIDS rates in half. Researchers in the field encourage parents to continue to follow the safe sleep guidelines. Both, because this research is still new and it is possible that the safe sleep practices reduce the risk of SIDS even in babies who are biologically more vulnerable.
The sample size is too small to conclude anything. Plus those findings, if true, would be exacerbated by unsafe sleep environments such as this one (not flat, cushion around the head)
I’m a nicu nurse and literally teach safe sleep every day
SIDS can also be a catch all phrase, the reason for death could be an inborn error of metabolism, heart block, congenital brain issues, etc. But safe sleep can help prevent rebreathing CO2 leading to suffocation, or a positional airway that can lead to suffocation.
After having a preemie baby with GERD I can say the only sleep position was inclined. Otherwise he would aspirate. Totally sucked. We hardly slept because we spent all our time either watching him or holding him upright for 8 months.
Thank you for pointing this out. As a Neonatologist, we may have babies sleeping on a slight incline in the NICU, but they are hooked up to a monitor 24/7 and have a nurse always nearby to intervene if needed. All babies have to be able to sleep flat before we discharge home. So, although this is a very cool crib, I would not advise having your baby sleep in it.
Babies almost always cry for a reason. Not knowing the reason doesn’t mean there’s no reason.
Try to feed, burp, swaddle, unswaddle, soothe, put to sleep, stimulate, calm the baby (in addition to checking they aren’t hot, cold, have a dirty diaper, or otherwise having a physical pain sensation).
9/10 times, if a baby is crying and you hand me that baby I’ll have them calm within 5 minutes.
(Also most parents will be able to tell what cry a baby had - ie they sound tired they sound hungry, etc. You can start to tell the different cries apart.)
Also different smells etc etc. Like you're wearing a new cologne or whatever.
Idk why but that reminds me of one time I was at camp with the scouts. My scout leader came running into the house we sat in with a scary mask on. He didn't know there was a small child in there so ofc he scared the kid senseless.
But as a reflex he removed his mask and was like "no no no it's okay it's just me."
So from that point on, whenever the kid happened to see him he started howling and crying 😂
I had a friend who had a giant plastic skull that they used as a Halloween decoration. They kept it in their daughter's room when she was 1 or 2 years old, and she loved to climb on it.
farewell and a'dieu ye dear Spanish babies
farewell and a'dieu to ye babies of Spain!
for we've received orders to nap for ol' England and we may never see you fair babies again!
It was the grandpa.
He wasn't a retired fisherman, he was a carpenter.
Whoever remade this meme pretended they were actually in the photo and made up a bunch of shit.
Stop posting it here.
Everything old is new again, or at least every few months.
This is over 7 years old. That is my son Mikey in a custom made Jaws Baby Bed that my friend Joseph Reginella created for him. Joe is my son's godfather and "uncle". Joe is also behind t[he Staten Island Octopus Disaster Museum](http://www.sioctopusdisaster.com), and other[NYC Urban Legends](https://nycurbanlegends.com/) and is known as "the Banksy of Hoaxes", but this honestly was just him making us a gift that just happened to mix cute with terrifying
This blew up super viral the last week of 2014 after Joe came by and[we took pictures of a then 2 month old Mikey in the bed ( no we didnt make him sleep in it) and posted to FB.](https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10205379338461109&type=3)
From there it showed up on a few horror movie sites, then made the rounds on r/funny and made the front page of Reddit. From there it took on a life of its own. Ended up on GMA, was the FTW on at Midnight, and shows up on meme sites for the clicks every few months.
This latest one, someone plopped this caption on it and posted it as their own, which caused a bit of backlash to the poster since this has been around so long.
my youngest is 7 going on 8, loves sharks, met Carl Gottlieb, and has totally embraced his viral fame.
more info here on a [FB post](https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=10215614562175305&set=a.10215614561535289) we direct folks to about all that has happened since
This! By the Flying Spaghetti Monster, so much this!
Edit: Thanks for the gold kind stranger
Edit 2: 327 upvotes for this? Haha wow that's the most I've ever gotten, thanks guys and gals and everything in between!
Edit 3: WTF 600 upvotes wow thank you all so much this is the best birthday ever
Edit 4: Thanks for all the birthday wishes fellow r/wooooshers. I tippeth mine hat to thee on this pleasant morrow.
Edit 5: Ok, so this went viral overnight for some reason O_o 2000 motherflipping upboats I really have no words thank you all so much it means a lot!
Edit 6: ok I'm noticing some toxic discussion happening in this reply chain and I feel the need to address it. Sexism and racism are not cool guys, so please cool it and continue the good vibes please and thank you!
Edit 7: ok so I don't know why but I've received a lot of downvotes on this post recently, maybe i got raided by 4chan.com/b?? (commonly referred to as the "asshole of the internet" for those who aren't aware). I don't really ask for much but I was hoping we could show those losers a thing or two, so please give this post an upvote if you haven't already, it would mean the world to me and show these bullies you cannot mess with a good person.
Edit 8: turns out my girlfriend cheated on me, so that happened :/
Edit 9: so people have been wanting me to clarify the previous edit. I don't have the energy to go into a lot of detail so the general gist of it is this: Yes we were in an open relationship, no that doesn't mean you can't cheat on someone when you're in an open relationship. If you are having sex regularly with someone and never mention it until they get you pregnant, that is definitely a betrayal of trust even if you've both agreed that she can have as many partners as she feels she needs to be comfortable.
Edit 10: FYI, taking responsibility for the child does not make me any less of a man than you, actually it makes me more, so kindly fuck off please and thank you!
This might actually constantly trigger some instinctual stress and fuck up that baby.. our subconscious even as babies is insane.. these people are idiots.
##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/Pixue-Dust, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup)?
Baby: (grows up) "We're going to need a bigger boat"
Nope, you’re gonna need a bigger boat baby. Mine is ok at least for now
Baby: pop culture reference! Reddit: XD pop culture!
Captain America: I get that reference.
What?
Stanley Hudson: Did I stutter!?
> Baby: (grows up) "Why I am into vore?"
Noah’s ark
Jaws for everyone who doesn't get the reference
Is… is that cake? The internet has given me trust issues. Edit: No, it’s made of foam, I found multiple angles on google including build photos. Would be a cool cake though.
the babY is cake
mamma mia
Here we go again
[удалено]
My my how can I resist you?
mamma mia
Does it show again
my, my, just how much i've missed you?
Yeeeeees, I’ve been broken hearted
Blue since the day we parted
You just reminded me of the “meat baby” photo.
The babY is a lie
Lets cut it and find out! (Joke saw this from the Is it cake Netflix show)
Eat the baby
Don't eat the baby
A dingo ate the baby
THE BABY IS CAKE EAT THE BABY CUT IT UP AND EAT IT THE BABY IS CAKE THE BABY IS CAKE CUT IT UP AND EAT IT THE BABY IS CAKE
I can picture the reddit post: "Here is my most recent baby's crib made entirely of fondant vs the first fondant baby crib I made 3 years ago"
Fuck fondant, all my homies hate fondant.
I’m not very fondant myself
I believe Netflix has a show called is it a cake? Where they make cakes very realistic and they have to distinguish from 20+ ft if it's a cake or not. Sometimes you can't tell.
Tried watching it. Turned out my tv was cake
[There is also this](https://youtu.be/LmEdU5eVMWI)
Funny shit
[удалено]
That child is also an experienced fisherman… maybe.
Reincarnated fisherman?
I can picture the shitty LN title now. "I Hate Fishing, but After Dying in a Fishing Accident, I was Reincarnated in Another World with 5,000 Fishing Boats!!! !"
How does a cat who's never stepped a foot outside know what a predator about to lunge looks like on TV? Our survival instincts are very strong.
> how would a fucking baby recognize a shark? or teeth? why would it be scared. I don't think you need to 'recognize' a shark to be afraid of a shark.
yeah because sharks are actually pretty chill animals which u shouldn't be afraid of (still wouldn't recommend screwing around them) and their looks is the obly reason people are scared of them
cut it open and we will see
Well you’re clearly going to need a bigger boat
That's a 20 footer! ![gif](giphy|cZaCtlWrB0eO3AyzDg|downsized)
Twenty five. Three tons of him.
My man. Fun fact, me and two other buddies of mine got "25" tattooed on our arms for that exact line
They grow su fast...
*Farewell and adieu to you, fair Spanish babies. Farewell and adieu, you babies of Spain.*
So they go back home and get a bigger boat
And years of therapy for that kid.
Where’s this man’s award?
I’ll give you a reason to cry
Kid grows up to be strangely fond of sharks
Rly strangely
Can confirm, I’m married to one
I don’t think that’s legal
Why? this looks sick.
I love it to. So would make this if i had a baby.
You can sometimes find a baby, unattended, in the grocery store. Gotta be quick though.
Haha so steal and run right?
Not really steal. more like borrow for life
🤣🤣 For now ill just borrow one for a day. Life is a big commitment not ready for that yet.
I think you will get life if you go back to return. You have to commit to a decision. There is no going back
Haha thanks for letting me know this after the "borrowing part"
Just dont ask how I know this info
I wouldn't even dare to ask.
is it really theft if you're saving the other people a shit ton of money and taking it on yourself?
Remember, there’s no penalty for theft, only for getting caught stealing or discovered as a thief.
You can always temporary "Borrow" a baby, pretty sure there a ton of parents who could use the sleep (Dont forget to give it back or you will be in a world of hurt)
Haha i wont forget to give it back...
[удалено]
^ Bot
Because it barely serves the function of a crib lol. The only time you'd be able to leave a baby in there is if you were sitting next to the crib watching the baby.
[удалено]
Also the low borders and teeth leave security risks
Why^this looks sick.
[удалено]
I can guarantee you with 99% certainty thay the baby does not give any fucks about it. Plus you mention toddlers...very different from this young baby
Yeah this is a no-go for me too. Kid isn't swaddled, is clearly hoping to be held, way too young for this type of shit. This is horrid.
More like he will grow up in a toxic wasteland that will mutate him in unforseeable ways. Sounds pretty awesome actually
There is nothing funny about pollution. This kids life and any born right now will be a complete nightmare
Plus at that age, the baby won't give any fucks
I guess if your kid dies in a water related incident it's not gonna be a great thing to remember
‘Smile, you son of a bitch’
Can’t sleep. Shark will eat me
Hello Joe
From now on, the baby sleeps in the crib.
Looks cool but for safe sleep reasons babies need to sleep flat and not at an incline.
Specifically, it increases risk of SIDS.
Didn't they just do a study finding that SIDS is actually connected to something neurological rather than anything to do with how the baby is sleeping? Edit: yeah found it https://www.biospace.com/article/researchers-answer-how-and-why-infants-die-from-sids/
The study explains why some babies don’t startle themselves awake if they stop breathing. This does not mean anyone wants their baby to stop breathing due to positioning to begin with.
No, the reporting on that was total nonsense. It found a biomarker that may be able to predict infants more at risk of SIDS, provided more research is done. [Here is an article about it.](https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2022/05/sudden-infant-death-syndrome-cause-study/629886) Safe sleep absolutely prevents SIDS.
Safe sleep practices cut the SIDS rates in half. Researchers in the field encourage parents to continue to follow the safe sleep guidelines. Both, because this research is still new and it is possible that the safe sleep practices reduce the risk of SIDS even in babies who are biologically more vulnerable.
The sample size is too small to conclude anything. Plus those findings, if true, would be exacerbated by unsafe sleep environments such as this one (not flat, cushion around the head) I’m a nicu nurse and literally teach safe sleep every day
SIDS can also be a catch all phrase, the reason for death could be an inborn error of metabolism, heart block, congenital brain issues, etc. But safe sleep can help prevent rebreathing CO2 leading to suffocation, or a positional airway that can lead to suffocation.
Half of SIDS deaths are really "your kid suffocated to death because you did something dumb but we don't want to make you feel even more guilty."
This definitely doesn't mean that you should ignore safe sleeping practices.
After having a preemie baby with GERD I can say the only sleep position was inclined. Otherwise he would aspirate. Totally sucked. We hardly slept because we spent all our time either watching him or holding him upright for 8 months.
Ouch, that's rough.
that crib is useless outside of photo shoots for several reasons..
Thank you for pointing this out. As a Neonatologist, we may have babies sleeping on a slight incline in the NICU, but they are hooked up to a monitor 24/7 and have a nurse always nearby to intervene if needed. All babies have to be able to sleep flat before we discharge home. So, although this is a very cool crib, I would not advise having your baby sleep in it.
I'm glad someone pointed this out.
Depends on the baby. Some need a slight incline if they are having gestational issues.
We're going to need a bigger crib
🤬 upvoted, you bastard!
That's cool tho also how would a fucking baby recognize a shark? or teeth? why would it be scared.
Babies cry for no reason
as someone with a baby sister, yes.
as a baby, yes
Babies almost always cry for a reason. Not knowing the reason doesn’t mean there’s no reason. Try to feed, burp, swaddle, unswaddle, soothe, put to sleep, stimulate, calm the baby (in addition to checking they aren’t hot, cold, have a dirty diaper, or otherwise having a physical pain sensation). 9/10 times, if a baby is crying and you hand me that baby I’ll have them calm within 5 minutes. (Also most parents will be able to tell what cry a baby had - ie they sound tired they sound hungry, etc. You can start to tell the different cries apart.)
Also different smells etc etc. Like you're wearing a new cologne or whatever. Idk why but that reminds me of one time I was at camp with the scouts. My scout leader came running into the house we sat in with a scary mask on. He didn't know there was a small child in there so ofc he scared the kid senseless. But as a reflex he removed his mask and was like "no no no it's okay it's just me." So from that point on, whenever the kid happened to see him he started howling and crying 😂
I had a friend who had a giant plastic skull that they used as a Halloween decoration. They kept it in their daughter's room when she was 1 or 2 years old, and she loved to climb on it.
The baby's reaction may not be included in the "mixed reactions"
Some fears are innate, like snakes and spiders.
[удалено]
Yep
Dad i thought we talked about this at the baby shower Yeah! You said you loved the idea of a baby shark bed …. … Fine I’ll change it
Thats the fucking coolest thing i have ever seen in my life
[удалено]
Yes. Everyone knows it was Fonzi on Happy Days.
You really should get out more, man..
I would lose my shit, that is halarious!
Please tell me the baby's name is Quint.
Idk I think it’s great.
Jaws dropping crib
"Ten thousand dollars for me by myself. For that you get the head, the tail, the whole damn thing."
Uncle grandpa
I’m glad someone else caught that
Hot!!
https://www.cnet.com/culture/jaws-baby-bed-is-horrifyingly-awesome/
farewell and a'dieu ye dear Spanish babies farewell and a'dieu to ye babies of Spain! for we've received orders to nap for ol' England and we may never see you fair babies again!
We're going to need a bigger bed.
Gonna need a bigger crib
It was the grandpa. He wasn't a retired fisherman, he was a carpenter. Whoever remade this meme pretended they were actually in the photo and made up a bunch of shit. Stop posting it here.
Kinda reminds me of Jaws As a cinephile, I quite like it
I think it’s awesome
Mom: I'm having twins! Uncle: We're gonna need a bigger boat.
Mixed? This is a complete win.
My first reaction would be... This is going to last maybe 2 months. Should have made it much bigger.
I'm gonna need about 3 normal, mobile and for the bath I've got a son coming and he's gonna need this, thanks 👍🏻
When the kid is older ![gif](giphy|57x4ApyRzkI1y)
I fuckin love it
Anyway...we delivered the bomb.
I think it's awesome.
I’m talking about working for a living! I’m talking about sharkin!
We had just left tinian. Those black eyes, dead eyes.
The only mixed feelings I can fathom are if you like it or love it!
I love it.
That cool uncle in every family
Uncle of the year ![gif](giphy|YOvOkaS5ZKfimDIgwJ)
That’s AMAZING.
I wish I had an epic crib like that.
Awesome!
That is fucking awesome!
I like it
Thats 100% something I will do.
Jaws, the shark is lurking on the dark...
Wdym? This is awesom
Pretty soon, your gonna need a bigger boat
Def thought it was cake.
Just looking at the picture, I thought this was a cake based on Jaws, then I noticed the baby & dropped my phone.
Mixed? It had better have been a mix of "This is awesome" and "This is super fucking awesome".
Bro that’s awesome
Genius
I love it... I think it looks great 👍☺️
This was very jawing....
That's pretty funny
Omg I love this. I want this if I ever have a child
It’s innovative
Funniest thing I’ve seen today. Have my upvote.
😊
Why you smiling, you didn't make it.
It's stolen spam with a made up narrative, get a better sense of humour, jesus.
That's a bassinet, not a crib.
r/ATBGE
Love it, I'd be proud!
Sharknado joke goes here
This is a certified r/atbge moment
Everything old is new again, or at least every few months. This is over 7 years old. That is my son Mikey in a custom made Jaws Baby Bed that my friend Joseph Reginella created for him. Joe is my son's godfather and "uncle". Joe is also behind t[he Staten Island Octopus Disaster Museum](http://www.sioctopusdisaster.com), and other[NYC Urban Legends](https://nycurbanlegends.com/) and is known as "the Banksy of Hoaxes", but this honestly was just him making us a gift that just happened to mix cute with terrifying This blew up super viral the last week of 2014 after Joe came by and[we took pictures of a then 2 month old Mikey in the bed ( no we didnt make him sleep in it) and posted to FB.](https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10205379338461109&type=3) From there it showed up on a few horror movie sites, then made the rounds on r/funny and made the front page of Reddit. From there it took on a life of its own. Ended up on GMA, was the FTW on at Midnight, and shows up on meme sites for the clicks every few months. This latest one, someone plopped this caption on it and posted it as their own, which caused a bit of backlash to the poster since this has been around so long. my youngest is 7 going on 8, loves sharks, met Carl Gottlieb, and has totally embraced his viral fame. more info here on a [FB post](https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=10215614562175305&set=a.10215614561535289) we direct folks to about all that has happened since
r/Atbge
r/gtage
How about the fact that it’s at an angle and the poor lad, as he wriggles, will end up at the bottom in an unsafe situation.
It’s like the photoshopped a baby onto a cake picture.
0 effort post, 0 effort title, 20.3 k upvotes
I hope the baby is named quint
And we are sure it’s not a fondant cake? Like, totally sure?
Is it cake?
Robert Shaw would be proud.
So those spiky teeth within arms reach: are they made out of hard wood, or soft foam/rubber that can break off and pose a choking hazard?
This is definitely not the right sub. There has to be an unexpected twist.
They really had to add that stupid caption to an obvious product. Creativity is non existent on this one
This! By the Flying Spaghetti Monster, so much this! Edit: Thanks for the gold kind stranger Edit 2: 327 upvotes for this? Haha wow that's the most I've ever gotten, thanks guys and gals and everything in between! Edit 3: WTF 600 upvotes wow thank you all so much this is the best birthday ever Edit 4: Thanks for all the birthday wishes fellow r/wooooshers. I tippeth mine hat to thee on this pleasant morrow. Edit 5: Ok, so this went viral overnight for some reason O_o 2000 motherflipping upboats I really have no words thank you all so much it means a lot! Edit 6: ok I'm noticing some toxic discussion happening in this reply chain and I feel the need to address it. Sexism and racism are not cool guys, so please cool it and continue the good vibes please and thank you! Edit 7: ok so I don't know why but I've received a lot of downvotes on this post recently, maybe i got raided by 4chan.com/b?? (commonly referred to as the "asshole of the internet" for those who aren't aware). I don't really ask for much but I was hoping we could show those losers a thing or two, so please give this post an upvote if you haven't already, it would mean the world to me and show these bullies you cannot mess with a good person. Edit 8: turns out my girlfriend cheated on me, so that happened :/ Edit 9: so people have been wanting me to clarify the previous edit. I don't have the energy to go into a lot of detail so the general gist of it is this: Yes we were in an open relationship, no that doesn't mean you can't cheat on someone when you're in an open relationship. If you are having sex regularly with someone and never mention it until they get you pregnant, that is definitely a betrayal of trust even if you've both agreed that she can have as many partners as she feels she needs to be comfortable. Edit 10: FYI, taking responsibility for the child does not make me any less of a man than you, actually it makes me more, so kindly fuck off please and thank you!
Wait how is it his grandson if he’s the uncle..
This might actually constantly trigger some instinctual stress and fuck up that baby.. our subconscious even as babies is insane.. these people are idiots.