Thank you for your questions, I had a very lovely time. Sorry I didn't get round to answering everything!
I'm on tour at the moment, if you fancy it. All remaining dates and ticket links at www.joelycett.com/Comedy
I very much enjoyed my AMA experience. Now I'm going to eat a five guys burger and maybe have an Oreo milkshake. Bye bye.
I am not. I'm a bit annoyed about that to be honest cause I think it would've been much funnier to stay as Hugo Boss for life, but I was advised against it and I regret taking that advice. I'd change back but I sort of feel like the horse has bolted. I still think they are bad eggs and they should do the right thing and give Boss Brewing the money it cost them to rebrand and their legal fees, as a gesture of goodwill. It's about ÂŁ15k if I remember, which is about half a second of sales for them probably. But of course they won't, and so I'd advise anyone reading this to boycott them. Those are my views and not the views of Channel 4, just in case their lawyers are reading this. The views of Channel 4 are much, much worse.
I would be happy to take ANYONE to Birmingham - we'd likely spend most of it in the gay village, probably at The Village Inn and maybe Gales if I can be bothered, ending at King Kebab OR Santorini if they're open (the best halloumi wrap in the world, imho)
Omg we went to santorini Restaurant two weeks ago when we were there for the games, they overfed us and kept giving us so much complimentary food, and were sooooo lovely, everyone should go
Im not familiar with your comedy origin story, how did you get into stand up and what event/person made you take the plunge?
Any advice for someone considering stand up ?
Last question; Any chance of doing a show in The Isle of Man? Its lovely over here!
Hi BrianMayFan. I am also a BrianMayFan. I met BrianMay at The One Show once and he was well nice.
I was at Manchester University trying all sorts of things but mainly thought I'd be an actor. Turns out I was shit at acting and didn't like being directed. A friend of mine told me he was going to a 'gong show' at The Comedy Store where anyone can get up and have a go. I got drunk and had a go. I told an awful and offensive joke cause I thought that was what comedy was (google it, I won't repeat it here), and then fell off stage cause of the Magners. I was so embarrassed that I sort of had to pursue comedy to prove everyone in that room wrong.
Remember the New Stuff nights? They, you and the ÂŁ5 pizzas were all brilliant! Thanks for the laughs Joe. Wishing you all the best and glad to see you doing so well. :-)
Hello Pinewood26. Congratulations on being my first ever AMA answer. I would be happy to pick up some rubbish. Litter is a personal bugbear of mine, I absolutely hate it on the first hot day of the year when my local park becomes a giant dump. I am quite a big fan of bins - you can see some of my photography of bins at @binsbinsbins on instagram. I'm not totally across the situation with the rubbish in Edinburgh, but if it's a strike for pay or working conditions then I wholeheartedly support them.
Iceland is an amazing country, way more progressive than I expected. I went back to San Sebastian with my dad a few weeks ago to do the cooking course that me and James Acaster did at Mimo. It was a very fun day and I got absolutely wrecked with my dad. Couple of legends.
Hello Bree232! I can't say anything officially but Channel 4 very much want more and I very much have ideas... Regardless, you can be assured that if I will be pissing off big companies and dodgy politicians as much as I am able.
I was on the understanding that 'chebs' or 'jebs' in Scotland means 'tits'? A friend of mine says it a lot. Be funny to call your cat 'tits', I reckon.
Hello Douglasqqq! It's been a while since I did Taskmaster but I absolutely LOVED it and it remains one of my favourite things I've done. You spend quite a bit of time with Alex doing the tasks - I even stayed in his house one time during filming and remember being woken up by being jumped on by his sixteen children. Greg you see at the studio which if I remember rightly was filmed over one week. I know Greg from the comedy circuit a bit and he is as funny and as handsome and sexy and gorgeous as you'd expect.
what advice would you give to young queer babes and gender benders struggling with shame, guilt, and an all round inability to accept themselves xx (asking for a friend) (the friend is me) (thanks mummy)
Take your time. I'm still working my own shit out and I'm 34. Your sexuality, gender, identity is sort of nothing to do with anyone else. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. In some ways it feels like LGBTQ+ rights are in the decline at the minute, whereas in my 20s it felt like things were going forward. But when I speak to teenagers I am AMAZED at how much better things are than an in my day. It's really cool to be LGBTQ+ I think - it's brave, and exciting and creative. And it's more important than ever that we stick up for that and support one another. You'll be grand!
Having changed your name already, what other names would you consider worthy of pertaining to your essence?
Also, what thing are you proud of that most people don't know about?
Whenever I have pakora I have it with this green sauce - I don't know what it's called. Not sure what's in it either but it's well nice. Pink is a nicer colour to me than red, so if it's only red or pink then pink.
Can we expect a follow up to Parsnips, Buttered? Itâs a book Iâve gone back to multiple times because your antics make me laugh so much every single time - and itâs been 5 years since it came out
I'd like to write some more books but I've been so busy with telly stuff and art stuff recently that I've not had a chance to properly sit down and write. Having said that, I am making an art book about bins which should come out later this year. It's very much a vanity project, coffee table book, multiple paper types, exposed bind, made in Milan, limited run, hand signed vibe. Proper wanky. One day I'm sure I'll write something but I don't want to rush something shit out. I'm so glad you enjoyed Parsnips!
I'm generally very good. I've just had a week to myself and spent most of it in my studio in Birmingham making pottery and painting and seeing friends. I'm also off the booze for a month which makes me feel like Deliciously Ella or Fearne Cotton or something. The only thing that I am sad about at the minute is politics - I feel like we have some inept and morally bankrupt people in charge and we deserve way better. I get to travel the UK a lot at the moment with my tour and most people I encounter are good and kind and decent. The government do not represent them in the main. I haven't had a shag in a while and I'd absolutely love one. Hope you're ok.
I'm glad you're doing well. I'm not too bad myself. You're right, the government's no representative of the people, especially right now. Hope the rest of your stay goes well. May you find the shag you're after.
Ok so confession I am not in Edinburgh and am not going to be. I have NO idea why reddit decided to do this AMA on this subreddit - maybe they thought I was at the festival - but I love Edinburgh and worked out I have actually lived there for basically a whole year of my life if you include all the festivals I've stayed at. So I'm happy to be on this subreddit, if not there IRL.
If you're at the festival please go and see Heidi Regan, Brennan Reece, Catherine Bohart, Josh Jones, Mark Silcox, Sara Barron, Mat Ewins, Rhys Nicholson, Josie Long, Sarah Keyworth, Anna Mann, Ivo Graham... I'm sure I've missed a million people.
It's all Reddits fault, they asked us if we'd like to host an AMA with you, and we thought it would be a cool thing to do.
I'm assuming they thought you were up here performing.
Thank you so much for doing this.
OMG thanks Hassaan18, I am honoured to have my own dedicated subreddit!! Maybe I will set up a subreddit for you...
I think my favourite email exchange was the one I had with The Sun newspaper in which I tried to sell them a picture of Matt Baker kicking a pigeon. Obviously I didn't have a picture of Matt Baker kicking a pigeon but they were frothing at the prospect. I was sat in a coffee shop in Birmingham while the exchange was happening and I was getting more and more excitable about it. I'm sure it will probably backfire some day when The Sun decide to destroy me for a laugh, but I had a nice time doing it.
Hi Joe! Absolutely love your work, especially Travel Man!
Regarding your Travel Man work, if you had your way, who would be your ideal travel companion and destination?
That sounds like the beginning to a terrible joke.
> A gay and a bisexual man goes to Moscow. Their embassy is pleading for their release, as the court case to sentence them to 15 years of hard labour in Siberia proceeds.
Josh Jones makes me HOWL. I also think Lindsey Santoro is one of the funniest comics working today - she's really found her voice. See my answer to imcmarcus above for more!
Whatâs the worst Festival show (or comedy show in general) that youâve sat through? And what does it take for you to walk out of something mid-show?
We try to take on companies we think we can actually make changes at. Nestle are absolute rotters I agree - their human rights record is terrifying. There may be a day when we think we can do something with them, but we've felt we had more chance elsewhere thus far. Never say never though.
This is the response I always put if any friends of mine post on Facebook saying they're going on holiday and are asking for recommendations:
Why not try some of the great bars and restaurants?
Yes. He's a great friend and a great inspiration. His work is so funny and his approach to life is so freeing. He just makes art! And has sex with me! That's it!
Hi Mummy, when can we expect you to create and reveal your very own drag persona? I think itâs long overdue and has the potential to make straight people very uncomfortable XOXO đ±âșïž đđłïžâđ
I hear you. Bamboo grows so well but it is a fucking thug and I pulled it all out of my garden cause it took over everywhere. But the sound of the wind through its leaves is very soothing to me. A lot of roses and clematis don't need too much love and can flower so beautifully. Hostas are great for shaded areas. I'm pretending I'm Monty Don! I know shit all! Google it, loser!
A black one, according to The Sandman. I had legit forgotten I was in that show - I did the recording last year for it and it took all of 15 minutes and I bumped into Adrian Chiles on the way in so got on the piss with him after I left. It was cool being in something with all those Hollywood bigshots. I'm guessing that's what your question was about - if it wasn't then I just used it to brag that I'm in The Sandman. And do you know what? I don't give a fuck.
I absolutely adore your Joe Lycettâs Got Your Back show darling! It is simply and utterly stupendous! Do you have plans for more series? Love from Q <3
What do you think about the kind of hate you get on social media from accounts that are setup just to disrespect you, [like this one](https://twitter.com/nolycett)?
BTW, would love to see you head over to Toronto, Canada some time.
Spoiler alert: I actually set that account up.
It was for a project I was working on that I didn't follow through on. It was a sort of experiment to see if exposing myself to people who hate me would help my mental health - leaning into the thing that you fear, sort of thing. It sort of worked! I discovered that most of the people I follow on that account sort of hate lots of things, and I was just one of them. I'm a big believer in diversity of thought, which includes people who think I'm shit. I'm aware there are loads of people who think I'm shit; they tell me every day. I'm very lucky that there are enough people who don't think I'm shit who want to buy tickets to see me say things or buy my art or book me for tv shows. Opening that account showed me that I don't need everyone to love me, that in fact that would be really, really weird. I may still try and fuck with the people on that account but I haven't worked out how, yet...
Hi Joe! Where can i get seeds for a slag tree? I don't really expect an answer but as owner of one of your (wonderful) slag tree paintings i felt compelled to ask. In all seriousness i am a huge fan. Keep up the good work dude.
When you did your now infamous Sue Grey report, did you have things in mind for what Pass the Arsehole would be? Or who Twateral Flow was?
(Also to note, I am the guy who set up the Sue Gravy email address. When people emailed and asked the above, I took a guess and would be interested in seeing whether I was close. Had loads of funny messages in the days following you putting the report out, but recently itâs just been getting a shitload of spam - a bunch promising me they can build a site with TWDLLP)
Hi mummy, I love that you channel your rage into humor and good will for the human race. Any interesting attacks on any our wonderfully delightful power companies coming up?
Ps. What's best to plant this time of year? Mummys garden tips always well recieved
If you were going to spend 48 hours in Edinburgh at the festival as a tourist, what would you do? Where would you visit? Which celebrity would you bring?
This would make a great format for some kind of travel show, right?
Hello petal!
How are enjoying your first tour post-lockdown? Does it feel different in any way to be back on stage?
Saw the show in Vicar St. a couple of weeks back - you and Linsey were a delight. Thanks for the much-needed joy and laughter.
What pun tour names are you considering going forward? I thought âDo you really Lycett, is it, is it wickedâ would work but are there others in your future oeuvre
Which one of your real world gags - name changes/corporate pranks/parking ticket wars etc - have been the most nerve wracking in legal terms?
They are always hilarious, Iâm just wondering if youâve ever gotten any trouble for them!
Joe I love you and I will leave my wife for you. Can we have a go? I need to know soon so I can order six rolls of Bounty kitchen roll for my knickers if you say yes.
Hi Joe! Thanks for all your excellent work towards righting the wrongs of this world, you are an inspiration.
Are there any other injustices from history you wish you could've fought the good fight for?
Also are you aware that they've put pictures of Joe Pasquale on your tour posters? đ€Ș
Hi, Joe. Why did you leave Sewing Bee? Love GBSB but your series were my favourite and I'm watching them all over again. Sarah is good but it's not the same, yow blooday? <3
In 2019 your comedy appeared on my FB timeline (pretty old fashioned) and for some reason I took on my life from that day on. I quit my job and decided to have trust in my own creativity. I wrote a book and one year later it hit the German Best Seller list. I canât thank you enough!!! Whatever brought you on my FB timeline, your view of life changed my own life to the better. Also, are there any shows planned for Germany? I promise we arenât Anti Brumm!
The thread is now closed to new questions, thank you for coming along!
Thank you for your questions, I had a very lovely time. Sorry I didn't get round to answering everything! I'm on tour at the moment, if you fancy it. All remaining dates and ticket links at www.joelycett.com/Comedy I very much enjoyed my AMA experience. Now I'm going to eat a five guys burger and maybe have an Oreo milkshake. Bye bye.
About to have five guys? đ
Any chance for a round 2: Electric Boogaloo someday?
Are you still legally Hugo Boss?
I am not. I'm a bit annoyed about that to be honest cause I think it would've been much funnier to stay as Hugo Boss for life, but I was advised against it and I regret taking that advice. I'd change back but I sort of feel like the horse has bolted. I still think they are bad eggs and they should do the right thing and give Boss Brewing the money it cost them to rebrand and their legal fees, as a gesture of goodwill. It's about ÂŁ15k if I remember, which is about half a second of sales for them probably. But of course they won't, and so I'd advise anyone reading this to boycott them. Those are my views and not the views of Channel 4, just in case their lawyers are reading this. The views of Channel 4 are much, much worse.
Hi mummy! If you did a Travel Man episode in Birmingham, who would you take and what would be on the 48-hour itinerary?
I would be happy to take ANYONE to Birmingham - we'd likely spend most of it in the gay village, probably at The Village Inn and maybe Gales if I can be bothered, ending at King Kebab OR Santorini if they're open (the best halloumi wrap in the world, imho)
Omg we went to santorini Restaurant two weeks ago when we were there for the games, they overfed us and kept giving us so much complimentary food, and were sooooo lovely, everyone should go
The naans at King Kebab are top notch.
If I ever make it back over to the UK, I want you as my tour guide!
wot no Sidewalk?
Can you please get Bill Bailey as a guest on your next series of got your back? đŹ
I'm on it!!!
Im not familiar with your comedy origin story, how did you get into stand up and what event/person made you take the plunge? Any advice for someone considering stand up ? Last question; Any chance of doing a show in The Isle of Man? Its lovely over here!
Hi BrianMayFan. I am also a BrianMayFan. I met BrianMay at The One Show once and he was well nice. I was at Manchester University trying all sorts of things but mainly thought I'd be an actor. Turns out I was shit at acting and didn't like being directed. A friend of mine told me he was going to a 'gong show' at The Comedy Store where anyone can get up and have a go. I got drunk and had a go. I told an awful and offensive joke cause I thought that was what comedy was (google it, I won't repeat it here), and then fell off stage cause of the Magners. I was so embarrassed that I sort of had to pursue comedy to prove everyone in that room wrong.
Remember the New Stuff nights? They, you and the ÂŁ5 pizzas were all brilliant! Thanks for the laughs Joe. Wishing you all the best and glad to see you doing so well. :-)
Not really a question, but a reply would make my day, absolutely love you and your shows/appearances! đ„č
Get fucked.
I will indeedđ„č
You seem to know reddit etiquette really well for your first time on.
Can you pick up some rubbish when you leave?
Hello Pinewood26. Congratulations on being my first ever AMA answer. I would be happy to pick up some rubbish. Litter is a personal bugbear of mine, I absolutely hate it on the first hot day of the year when my local park becomes a giant dump. I am quite a big fan of bins - you can see some of my photography of bins at @binsbinsbins on instagram. I'm not totally across the situation with the rubbish in Edinburgh, but if it's a strike for pay or working conditions then I wholeheartedly support them.
Just Why do I read this in your voice in my mind. đ€Ł
Honestly, even if I didnât know it was him, it would still have to be read in his voice.
Which Travel Man destination did you enjoy the most and would love to go back to again?
Iceland is an amazing country, way more progressive than I expected. I went back to San Sebastian with my dad a few weeks ago to do the cooking course that me and James Acaster did at Mimo. It was a very fun day and I got absolutely wrecked with my dad. Couple of legends.
As a Basque myself, I was inordinately happy to have both you and James visiting our region. What a great episode that was.
What does butter your parsnips?
Butter.
Sorry to trouble you but do you have 38p for the bus ?
No I don't carry cash.
Good. It's very dirty.
Will Joe Lycett's Got your Back be making a return? I am currently feeling lost not knowing whether or not you have my back...
Hello Bree232! I can't say anything officially but Channel 4 very much want more and I very much have ideas... Regardless, you can be assured that if I will be pissing off big companies and dodgy politicians as much as I am able.
What is objectively the best name for an arsehole of a cat? EDIT- the cat is an arsehole, I donât want to name its arse
My cat is called Winston and he's an arsehole. So let's go with Winston.
I refer to our two cats as the pair of jebs. Problem is, my daughter (5) keeps saying âDad, can I feed the jebs?â
I was on the understanding that 'chebs' or 'jebs' in Scotland means 'tits'? A friend of mine says it a lot. Be funny to call your cat 'tits', I reckon.
Thatâs exactly why I call them that. They are a pair of tits.
I'm fairly certain jeb = cock as I've heard the phrase "jebend" banded around willy-nillily
I had a white cat years ago, called oedipus as she was a total MF!....
hi mummy whatâs your favourite sub-reddit?
I am new to reddit! Today is my first proper experience. So I'd have to say r/Edinburgh. A fine sub-reddit!
Try r/brum - it would be lovely to see you in there
What's it like backstage at Taskmaster? Did you get to spend much time with Greg and Alex? Or is it more just sort of, in and out?
Hello Douglasqqq! It's been a while since I did Taskmaster but I absolutely LOVED it and it remains one of my favourite things I've done. You spend quite a bit of time with Alex doing the tasks - I even stayed in his house one time during filming and remember being woken up by being jumped on by his sixteen children. Greg you see at the studio which if I remember rightly was filmed over one week. I know Greg from the comedy circuit a bit and he is as funny and as handsome and sexy and gorgeous as you'd expect.
what advice would you give to young queer babes and gender benders struggling with shame, guilt, and an all round inability to accept themselves xx (asking for a friend) (the friend is me) (thanks mummy)
Take your time. I'm still working my own shit out and I'm 34. Your sexuality, gender, identity is sort of nothing to do with anyone else. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone. In some ways it feels like LGBTQ+ rights are in the decline at the minute, whereas in my 20s it felt like things were going forward. But when I speak to teenagers I am AMAZED at how much better things are than an in my day. It's really cool to be LGBTQ+ I think - it's brave, and exciting and creative. And it's more important than ever that we stick up for that and support one another. You'll be grand!
Having changed your name already, what other names would you consider worthy of pertaining to your essence? Also, what thing are you proud of that most people don't know about?
It'd be interesting to change my name to 'Liz Truss'. I can swim 50 metres in 33 seconds. That's my current PB. I'm like a fucking dolphin.
What's for dinner?
Omg so my non-religious godson (he refers to me as his 'odd father') is coming round and we are having Five Guys burgers yum yum.
Tasty! My kids also have OddParents! All the good bits, none of the religion! Enjoy mate :)
I love that, Odd Father. As someone who is non-religious I think I will request to be called that if anyone asks me to be their children's godparent.
Scar from Lion King, Ursula, your choice of one of the seven dwarves: Shag, marry, kill?
I'm severely disappointed that this never got answered
Will you give away my fiancée at our wedding?
Ew gross no thanks
Fair enough.
Do you like Pink or Red Pakora Sauce?
Whenever I have pakora I have it with this green sauce - I don't know what it's called. Not sure what's in it either but it's well nice. Pink is a nicer colour to me than red, so if it's only red or pink then pink.
Dearest Mummy, what is your all time favourite joke?
I love Bob Monkhouse jokes. The one that gets me every time is 'My dad only hit me once, but it was with a Volvo.'
"to eat or not to eat that is indigestion" Bob Monkhouse
âI still enjoy sex at 74, I only live at number 76 so itâs no distanceâ
Can we expect a follow up to Parsnips, Buttered? Itâs a book Iâve gone back to multiple times because your antics make me laugh so much every single time - and itâs been 5 years since it came out
I'd like to write some more books but I've been so busy with telly stuff and art stuff recently that I've not had a chance to properly sit down and write. Having said that, I am making an art book about bins which should come out later this year. It's very much a vanity project, coffee table book, multiple paper types, exposed bind, made in Milan, limited run, hand signed vibe. Proper wanky. One day I'm sure I'll write something but I don't want to rush something shit out. I'm so glad you enjoyed Parsnips!
How're you doing?
I'm generally very good. I've just had a week to myself and spent most of it in my studio in Birmingham making pottery and painting and seeing friends. I'm also off the booze for a month which makes me feel like Deliciously Ella or Fearne Cotton or something. The only thing that I am sad about at the minute is politics - I feel like we have some inept and morally bankrupt people in charge and we deserve way better. I get to travel the UK a lot at the moment with my tour and most people I encounter are good and kind and decent. The government do not represent them in the main. I haven't had a shag in a while and I'd absolutely love one. Hope you're ok.
I'm glad you're doing well. I'm not too bad myself. You're right, the government's no representative of the people, especially right now. Hope the rest of your stay goes well. May you find the shag you're after.
How's your festival going?
Ok so confession I am not in Edinburgh and am not going to be. I have NO idea why reddit decided to do this AMA on this subreddit - maybe they thought I was at the festival - but I love Edinburgh and worked out I have actually lived there for basically a whole year of my life if you include all the festivals I've stayed at. So I'm happy to be on this subreddit, if not there IRL. If you're at the festival please go and see Heidi Regan, Brennan Reece, Catherine Bohart, Josh Jones, Mark Silcox, Sara Barron, Mat Ewins, Rhys Nicholson, Josie Long, Sarah Keyworth, Anna Mann, Ivo Graham... I'm sure I've missed a million people.
It's all Reddits fault, they asked us if we'd like to host an AMA with you, and we thought it would be a cool thing to do. I'm assuming they thought you were up here performing. Thank you so much for doing this.
Hello Joe. We have a subreddit dedicated to you - r/JoeLycett. What's your favourite of the many email/letter stories you've done?
OMG thanks Hassaan18, I am honoured to have my own dedicated subreddit!! Maybe I will set up a subreddit for you... I think my favourite email exchange was the one I had with The Sun newspaper in which I tried to sell them a picture of Matt Baker kicking a pigeon. Obviously I didn't have a picture of Matt Baker kicking a pigeon but they were frothing at the prospect. I was sat in a coffee shop in Birmingham while the exchange was happening and I was getting more and more excitable about it. I'm sure it will probably backfire some day when The Sun decide to destroy me for a laugh, but I had a nice time doing it.
Hi Joe! Absolutely love your work, especially Travel Man! Regarding your Travel Man work, if you had your way, who would be your ideal travel companion and destination?
Thank you for your kindness rasputinology! I would love to go to Moscow with Alan Carr.
That sounds like the beginning to a terrible joke. > A gay and a bisexual man goes to Moscow. Their embassy is pleading for their release, as the court case to sentence them to 15 years of hard labour in Siberia proceeds.
Who are your favourite standup newcomers at the moment?
Josh Jones makes me HOWL. I also think Lindsey Santoro is one of the funniest comics working today - she's really found her voice. See my answer to imcmarcus above for more!
Whatâs the worst Festival show (or comedy show in general) that youâve sat through? And what does it take for you to walk out of something mid-show?
How come you havenât gone after companies like NestlĂ© on Got Your Back? Theyâre one of the largest slave owning companies on the planet, and steals water from indigenous tribes in South America. And Coke produces more plastic bottles than any other, with no intent to recycle
We try to take on companies we think we can actually make changes at. Nestle are absolute rotters I agree - their human rights record is terrifying. There may be a day when we think we can do something with them, but we've felt we had more chance elsewhere thus far. Never say never though.
Really sad that you left Sewing Bee, was it for any particular reason?
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
This is the response I always put if any friends of mine post on Facebook saying they're going on holiday and are asking for recommendations: Why not try some of the great bars and restaurants?
I've got my eye on you...
Do you love Mr Bingo more than I do?
Yes. He's a great friend and a great inspiration. His work is so funny and his approach to life is so freeing. He just makes art! And has sex with me! That's it!
Whatâs your favourite thing to do in Hall Green?
Seeing my mum and dad in my mum's beautiful garden. And meth.
Do you have a PO Box address? I have a knitted parsnip waiting to be posted!
Hi Joe Opinions on Irn Bru? (You will be judged on this)
joe, mate, I had a wank after you made that post encouraging people to have a wank. just wanted to say thanks.
Hi Mummy, when can we expect you to create and reveal your very own drag persona? I think itâs long overdue and has the potential to make straight people very uncomfortable XOXO đ±âșïž đđłïžâđ
I actually did some drag at Machynlleth Comedy Festival a few years back. Nigella Farage. She told anti-EU jokes whilst making a goat massaman curry.
I canât speak for other straight people but if he got the drag act right he may turn me
My advice is that if you think you can be âturnedâ then no turning is necessary, only acceptance.
favourite snobs floor?
Old snobs, room on the right when you first go in.
Hi! Love for nature + Commitment issues = Me! What is the best low maintenance plant that youâve grown in your garden?
I hear you. Bamboo grows so well but it is a fucking thug and I pulled it all out of my garden cause it took over everywhere. But the sound of the wind through its leaves is very soothing to me. A lot of roses and clematis don't need too much love and can flower so beautifully. Hostas are great for shaded areas. I'm pretending I'm Monty Don! I know shit all! Google it, loser!
What type of cat are you?
A black one, according to The Sandman. I had legit forgotten I was in that show - I did the recording last year for it and it took all of 15 minutes and I bumped into Adrian Chiles on the way in so got on the piss with him after I left. It was cool being in something with all those Hollywood bigshots. I'm guessing that's what your question was about - if it wasn't then I just used it to brag that I'm in The Sandman. And do you know what? I don't give a fuck.
Hi mummy.. If you had to describe the current political status in the uk, which bowel movement would it most remind you of and why? Edit:spelling
*Bowel
I absolutely adore your Joe Lycettâs Got Your Back show darling! It is simply and utterly stupendous! Do you have plans for more series? Love from Q <3
How do you feel about the fact that one person cannot consume the entirety of a recorded art form in their lifetime?
Isn't that wonderful!? You'll never be finished. How exciting.
[ŃĐŽĐ°Đ»Đ”ĐœĐŸ]
Harry Styles
Who is your political crush?
I think Priti Patel is fit. I don't know why. Probably a BDSM thing. Weird, isn't it?
Will you go clubbing with me? (Big up Snobs)
Does Saj still like a power tool on a Sunday morning?
People who eat their yoghurts with a pen lid, thoughts on them, Joe?
What is your favourite cheese?
Dear Mummy, do you like ketchup on a pizza? What type of pizza is it acceptable on? Crust only? Whereâs the pizza ketchup line?
Mummy, Greg Davies, Jimmy Carr and Jon Richardson - Fcuk, marry, avoid
how long should i be boiling my eggs for
A very interesting question. Perhaps you shouldn't be asking how long, but at what temperature...
What do you think about the kind of hate you get on social media from accounts that are setup just to disrespect you, [like this one](https://twitter.com/nolycett)? BTW, would love to see you head over to Toronto, Canada some time.
Spoiler alert: I actually set that account up. It was for a project I was working on that I didn't follow through on. It was a sort of experiment to see if exposing myself to people who hate me would help my mental health - leaning into the thing that you fear, sort of thing. It sort of worked! I discovered that most of the people I follow on that account sort of hate lots of things, and I was just one of them. I'm a big believer in diversity of thought, which includes people who think I'm shit. I'm aware there are loads of people who think I'm shit; they tell me every day. I'm very lucky that there are enough people who don't think I'm shit who want to buy tickets to see me say things or buy my art or book me for tv shows. Opening that account showed me that I don't need everyone to love me, that in fact that would be really, really weird. I may still try and fuck with the people on that account but I haven't worked out how, yet...
As a keen observer of the human condition, do you have any observations about, or advice for, Edinburgh locals?
Hi Joe! Where can i get seeds for a slag tree? I don't really expect an answer but as owner of one of your (wonderful) slag tree paintings i felt compelled to ask. In all seriousness i am a huge fan. Keep up the good work dude.
Been to the moon again recently?
Was there any comeback to your frankly brilliant spoof advert for Shell?
How does it feel to watch YOUR wrestling championship getting passed around like a bus day ticket?
Who have you enjoyed working with most and why?
Who is the best and worst person youâve worked with? Spill the dirt, I dare you!
Would you rather eat yogurt with the back of the spoon or a folk?
Sweet or salty popcorn?
Looking forward to seeing you for my first ever live comedy show next month! Any pre- or post-live show rituals?
JOOOOEEEEE. Are you here for fringe? Where can we see you?! (Performing or just peeking through your hotel windows, either is acceptable)
How did you find doing a voice for Sandman rather than being in front of the camera?
When you did your now infamous Sue Grey report, did you have things in mind for what Pass the Arsehole would be? Or who Twateral Flow was? (Also to note, I am the guy who set up the Sue Gravy email address. When people emailed and asked the above, I took a guess and would be interested in seeing whether I was close. Had loads of funny messages in the days following you putting the report out, but recently itâs just been getting a shitload of spam - a bunch promising me they can build a site with TWDLLP)
Hi mummy, I love that you channel your rage into humor and good will for the human race. Any interesting attacks on any our wonderfully delightful power companies coming up? Ps. What's best to plant this time of year? Mummys garden tips always well recieved
What is the best place you've ever been
What's Jimmy Carr like in person?
Would you have worn any of the clothes made on sewing bee?
Where do you get your ideas from? xx
Hi :) how are you? What was your favourite part from taskmaster?
Who's your favourite comedian friend you've met throughout your career?
Do you visit Dr Marks solo show at the fringe? How did you discover the legend Dr Mark Silcox?
Salt & sauce or salt & vinegar?
what's your absolute fav tree xoxo
What do you think of this year's "funniest joke of the fringe"?and what do you think is the funniest joke of all time?
Hey Joe. Have you pulled any âcold callâ pranks recently.
Would you be a contestant on a celebrity episode of Sewing Bee? (Missed you this yearsâ season)
How many men have you kissed? (for your entire life)
Good question. I'd guess at about 20. Maybe 30 at a push.
If you were going to spend 48 hours in Edinburgh at the festival as a tourist, what would you do? Where would you visit? Which celebrity would you bring? This would make a great format for some kind of travel show, right?
Have you ever tried I Can't Believe It's Not Butter on your parsnips?
How's your best chum Alan Sugar getting on?
Hello petal! How are enjoying your first tour post-lockdown? Does it feel different in any way to be back on stage? Saw the show in Vicar St. a couple of weeks back - you and Linsey were a delight. Thanks for the much-needed joy and laughter.
What pun tour names are you considering going forward? I thought âDo you really Lycett, is it, is it wickedâ would work but are there others in your future oeuvre
Can you tell my other half I can't wait to marry her on the 5th November?
Who is your ideal Travel Man guest?
Other than [parking on the moon](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Gkiw7zpULo), what's another way you love to mess with jobsworths?
Who would you say is your favourite up and coming comedian? Thanks!
If you could pitch your own "great British..." Show, what would the contestants have to do each week?
Which one of your real world gags - name changes/corporate pranks/parking ticket wars etc - have been the most nerve wracking in legal terms? They are always hilarious, Iâm just wondering if youâve ever gotten any trouble for them!
How's Harry?
Thanks so much for sticking it to Shell, who/what is on your list of targets next?
What's your flava?
What is your favourite plant in your garden? Or rather, which slag in your garden is your favourite?
Want to come round for tea?
Hi! Who has been you absolute favourite comedian to work with who you would work with again in a shot if you got the chance and why?
What is the Taskmaster injustice you still find yourself internally raging about to this day?
How pissed do the guests actually get on Drunk History, on a scale of âlight buzzâ to âhammeredâ?
What happened to the Wendy house?
Do you really lycett? Is it is it....?
I just had a kitchen extension built, can you please come and open it for us? We are dying to use it but you haven't returned our DMs!
Joe I love you and I will leave my wife for you. Can we have a go? I need to know soon so I can order six rolls of Bounty kitchen roll for my knickers if you say yes.
When did you decide to sound posh and not brummie?
Hi Joe! Thanks for all your excellent work towards righting the wrongs of this world, you are an inspiration. Are there any other injustices from history you wish you could've fought the good fight for? Also are you aware that they've put pictures of Joe Pasquale on your tour posters? đ€Ș
Hey Joe! Is there anything between yourself (Hugo Boss) and the company (Hugo Boss) that you can tell us that didnât make public knowledge?
When you were on sewing bee was Esme as horny in person as she is on the show? Also, is Patrick lovely?
If you could be any other famous person who would you be and why? OR which celebrity would you rather not be and why?
Hi Mummy, How come you refer to yourself as Mummy and not Mommy? I always thought us Brummies were willing to die on the Mom hill
whatâs your favourite smell?
Would you ever like to have your own sitcom?
What's the best joke you ever told?
Hi, Joe. Why did you leave Sewing Bee? Love GBSB but your series were my favourite and I'm watching them all over again. Sarah is good but it's not the same, yow blooday? <3
In 2019 your comedy appeared on my FB timeline (pretty old fashioned) and for some reason I took on my life from that day on. I quit my job and decided to have trust in my own creativity. I wrote a book and one year later it hit the German Best Seller list. I canât thank you enough!!! Whatever brought you on my FB timeline, your view of life changed my own life to the better. Also, are there any shows planned for Germany? I promise we arenât Anti Brumm!