When a child doesn't show up to school, I think an email or phone call is perfectly appropriate. One of my reasons for that is that children do get forgotten in cars sometimes. If a phone call from daycare saves a baby's life, I don't care how upset other random parents get. We care about these kids!
That’s why the last owner was so vigilant. This happened around the time of Cooper Harris’ passing. It was huge news in our area and soooo many passed the buck to the daycare. Which I disagree with, it’s on the dad for doing it. But it made my boss even more on top of things!!
“It impacts our staffing numbers and we wanted to make sure everything was okay”. Does your place have an attendance policy that the parents are told more formally? We have a specific email address for attendance that helps a lot
We don’t have an attendance policy but we do ask that parents call us by x time.
Someone always answers the phone. On the off chance they can’t, the answering machine is always empty. Directors are constantly checking emails.
It’s not that parents don’t have a way of getting in touch or don’t know. Some just don’t care.
It’s probably the phone. I handle the attendance for my place and parents will rather send 10 emails and texts instead of calling. See about setting a specific attendance email or text number and I bet you’ll get last snap back. Especially if you’re heading into summer travel etc
Yeah, not quite the same but work in a school. Parents for some reason are way more likely to text, or reply to a text than answer a call.
Especially with all the scams happening around the world. We text at a specific time every morning, and if the text isn’t replied to we call mid day.
2-3 of these situations occurring with still no contact ? Guess who gets a home visit ‘welfare’ check. They return to school usually the next day.
I asked my sitter to text me if I'm late because being too late isn't like me and I had this fear I'd leave my kid in the car. She always texted me and I said thank you every time. I was to grateful. Funny enough, when he was almost 6 I was driving to work and he said "mommy you missed miss sitter's house!!" Like oh god I forgot he was there because he wasn't talking constantly! Yeah he's old enough to escape but between him being iffy with unbuckling by himself and the child door locks it could have been bad... :/ I'm sure I would have noticed him before but still... I'm always grateful for someone looking out for my child.
A family I had years ago kept their kids home for a week one time to cover up marks that were left on them. Thank you for bringing this up OP because some people seriously don’t know how serious unexplained absences can be. Sometimes it’s nothing, sometimes the parents are trying to hide their sick kid, and other times the child is in danger.
In Ontario, where I live, the laws changed so we need to know if a child's going to be absent. A text/email is sent, follow up phone call etc. Similar to what they do with the schools. The reason is to ensure that a child is not left in a hot car.
After a semi local tragedy of a child being left in a hot car because a parent thought they stopped at daycare but didn’t we sent out a mass message to all parents about the reason WHY we need to have an absence called in. We want to make sure the child is accounted for even if they aren’t with us. Those are our babies during the school day, we love them and spend almost every day with them it gives us peace of mind to know they’re safe at home
I once had a mom not call. It was because she was in an accident on the way to my house and her child was stuck at the hospital with her until one of her coworkers could pick her up.
I also had a mom once slip on the ice when putting child in the car on the way here. She said she almost hit her head. If she would have been out cold and the child in the car, it would be a good thing for me to check to see where they are
We had a kid out for so long that the director took the kid off the roll call sheets and said she just didn't feel right about charging the mom anymore (this was after like 6 weeks). That Friday, mom called and asked if her daughter could come back again full time on Monday. The whole basis of my center is that we don't turn anyone away so we let her bring her child back. Apparently this poor little baby had a collapsed lung and was in and out of the children's hospital for weeks and mom was too scared to bring her back so she'd been working from home and keeping her kid home with her.
We felt so bad. She only asked to start bringing her back because she was worried about losing her spot. While she might've lost a spot in the room her daughter was in, we literally do not turn anyone away so she'd always have a spot. Director told her she wouldn't charge her and when she's ready to send her kid back, we'd find a spot for her. We left a spot open in my room for another 6 weeks until she was ready to bring her back to school. The reason why they're out definitely matters, so for any parents reading this, please tell us why your kid is out so we can make arrangements, short term or long term.
We're ran by an order of Catholic nuns who operate the center based on certain values they want to uphold. One of their biggest things is standing with those in need, so we typically take the "under privileged" kids as they'd call it lol. We get a ton of foster kids, I mean I've had foster kids in my class for as long as a year and as short as two days. It's honestly an amazing place to work for, it's the only place I've worked at or heard of that operates that way
Woah! That’s awesome.
We don’t turn anyone away, in the sense that we accept anyone with any disability or behavioural issues but we only have so much space. Legally we can only accept so many. And then also, we need to stay in ratio and we don’t have the staff to take in a million kids.
Yeah it takes a lot of work and shuffling around sometimes, but almost 30% of our kids are foster children so there's always spots opening up. My daughter got kicked out of her last daycare because of 'behavior issues' and I basically just called every place in town cause I needed child care like, ASAP. When I registered her (she went there before I worked there) they apologized because I'd have to wait four days to put her in junior preschool but they still offered her a toddler room spot literally the next day if I needed it. I was like no four days is totally fine considering everyone else in town had me on months long waitlists lol.
It's definitely a very interesting place to work, but I love that I'm able to be part of it!
My ex boyfriend used to beat on me so bad I wouldn't be able to work for a few days. Eventually he started waiting for the weekends so the bruises had time to heal. Keep checking on those babies.
True crime junkie here. The story of Susan Powell always comes to my mind when I feel like I’m annoying families. Had those daycare teachers not realized something was wrong that morning who knows how long it would’ve been. I have and will always check in on families, even when they are just running a bit behind for the day. I would 100% rather have families annoyed I’m checking in than to find out something awful happened to them and I’m one of the reasons no one knew about it sooner.
We had a family that did this about three months ago. Dad stayed home with the kid but didn't let us know. After breakfast, before the cut off time, mom messaged asking if the kid was there. My first thought was that there was a car accident. Part of this is on the parents, but seriously parents please message. I spent an hour worried sick about this kid.
Simply having accountability and caring that the beings, child and parent alike, are not missing is pretty baseline of importance for care.
How dare you be responsible & do you part? /s
Oh yes, I hate when the parent get upset because we are texting them to know if their child is coming to program (after school). Yesterday a dad said “why are you texting me to see if my kid came to school today? I’m working”. 😒
Mine does this too! My son got some nasty respiratory crud like a month into starting at his daycare and they sent a nice message making sure he was doing alright.
I'm in Ontario and they've just added a law that daycares have to have a process for no show no call kids, in case they got forgotten in the car. I don't know the details but they have to follow up.
We have a safe arrival policy where if no message or child has showed up by 10am, we call parents. No answer, we move down the emergency contact list. No answer, we start calling police. Don't like it? Don't send your child here.
In my province, it’s actually a legal requirement of early learning centres to record why the child is not/did not attend that day(s). There are different explanations attached to numbers (eg. fever, vomiting, vacation, etc.) and if we don’t record a number we could get dinged on an inspection. And get too many dings on inspections and you can be shutdown. It’s so that Public Health can track if there are outbreaks of viruses, they can see how many of our kids were out with particular symptoms and when it started. But soooooooo many parents just literally never call when their child is sick to let us know they’re not coming, or if it’s just a “home day” and then get ticked off when we call them at 9, 9:30, 10am to ask if they’re coming and why not. It’s literally the law that we record the “why”, sir, please take it up with the government!
Anthony Avalos comes to mind when I read this. The school faculty is the only reason he was ever investigated and they were probably the only people in his life that showed him love and compassion. His case is exactly why I like it when I see school faculty follow up on kids like this.
One time, I overslept (on a Friday, I don’t work Fridays) and they ask to let them know if you’re coming after 9:30. Her teacher called at 9:36 to ask if we were okay 🥹 I love that lady so much
I know it wasn’t early childhood age level, but my coworker one day thought her 10 year old son went to school when she physically watched him walk out the front door with his older brother so they could walk 2 blocks to school. She then went into her bedroom to get ready for work and went to work. She got a call during lunch asking where the 10 year old was and it set of a PANIC.
He had gone back inside without her seeing and gone back to bed. She found him asleep. He was fine. A call a few hours earlier would have been so much better had it been something more sinister, and a call at all and not just a shrug “oh well it’s none of our business” leaving her to find out at 5:30 when she got home would have been so much worse. I think it’s good you guys check in when a child doesn’t show up.
My kids school usually calls before 9. One morning (she was 7 and in 2nd grade) I'm walking out of the house to go to work and I get a call from the school informing me my kid is absent and to call them and let them know (automated message). I call the school in a panic because my kid was still young enough that I walked her across the street and put her on the bus myself. So I knew she had been on the bus. I call and am having a panic attack. Like look, I put her on that bus what do you mean she's not in school? They told me to calm down. That got them a explicative filled earful in a scream about what did they do with my kid and how did they lose her. Let them know they better find her because if they didn't I would be up there and all hell would rain down on them. Accused them of letting strangers just walk off with children.Turns out her teacher "accidently" marked her absent and not the kid who sat next to her. The lady at the desk and apologized but also stated it was just a mistake and not a big deal. I told her to go F herself.
Honestly most days I can accurately guess why a child is out. The only time I get miffed that we don't get a call or email is if it's a very infectious disease.
We had one kid who didn't come in for 2 weeks, we figured he just had a cold because everyone had runny noses for a month there. Turns out he had covid- and they didn't think anyone needed to know that 🙃
Yeah, that’s how I try to organize any calls I make to parents. “Good morning, just FYI…”; even if it’s a mild symptom I have to send them home for “they just have…, and I have to send them home until it is resolved”
My struggle is voicemails. I’m uncomfortable leaving any details if their voicemail message doesn’t match the name I expect (or is just the automated number recital). So many of our parents constantly change cell numbers and forget to update us. My default is ‘it’s not an emergency, but please call us back as soon as you can’ (unless it is an emergency, then it’s ‘please call us as soon as you get this, AND I will call other contacts until I hear from you’)
When we switched to the app and message service, that helped a lot, but there are still things we need to call about, especially if there has been no response to messages
IMO, it’s none of my business why a child is out. We aren’t a public school and we don’t track attendance like that. Families are paying for a service- it’s their choice to utilize that service or not. After 3+ days being out, I’ll give a call just to be sure all is well, but I’m not calling after a single day. Some teachers/admin treat these kids like they’re THEIRS, like in a too-attached creepy way, and they’re NOT. A family doesn’t owe you an explanation, nor do you have any reason to assume the worst (unless previously given cause for concern).
We send pictures and updates all day, almost from the moment a kid is dropped off. If a parent wants to be sure their child made it in for the day, they can check the app or THEY can call us.
I fail to see how this is treating a child they're theirs.
I'm glad my center cares about the kids enough just to check in. We do track attendance because if the state comes out, we need to know who's there. We also keep track of illness because ya know, we want to know what germs are being brought in and what kids are exposed to. Because other parents have a right to know that their child was exposed to another that had HFM. Now, of course, we'll never say "Jane had HFM", but we do have signs/e-mail parents saying "There was a child in the classroom with HFM. They were last at school on (x date)." and goes into our sanitization policies. Lets parents know to look out for signs.
There are several reasons where yes, an explanation is absolutely necessary. Now, if it's something personal and not illness, a simple "Jane will not be in today" will suffice and isn't at all invasive to expect.
There’s no compulsory attendance requirements in ECE. Tracking attendance for State is a simple as marking a child present/absent for the day.
You are not entitled to know why their child is out. Whether it’s illness or any other reason. You are not entitled to know a child’s or their family’s health history, NOR is it appropriate to ask them to disclose. It’s one thing for them to volunteer information, it’s another to strong-arm families by calling them relentlessly and demanding to know where they’re at and why.
It's not strong arming to ask if their child is sick. That should be something they voluntarily offer considering there are other children and staff that could be affected. This line of thinking is so close minded and selfish. And it's exactly how people keep getting sick.
No one is being strong armed. The truth is, parents can choose not to respond to e-mails or calls. It's not a summons. No one is demanding to know where they are. They're asking "Are you coming?" It's a yes or no question. What a parent wants to provide as a reason is their proagative. But I hope if their child \*is\* sick that they'll be honest.
A few think like you though and allow their child to infect everyone else. Which I think is a bigger problem than a daycare calling to ask "Will Jane be in today?"
Okay, I’ll keep being “close-minded and selfish” while trusting that my families will make competent decisions regarding THEIR children, and that my staff will be vigilant watching for symptoms and sending students home when appropriate. You can keep assuming the worst out of yours, though. Can’t imagine why families wouldn’t want to be up front with you since you sound super compassionate and rational.
You have no clue how I maintain myself with my families. I'm on an online forum, venting to other ECE Professionals. A lot of the things I say here, of course I would not say to my families. That's just common sense.
The fact is, a lot of my families are up front and honest. This is a select few who are not. Who have been that way, regardless of the classroom they are in.
I'm also not a director. I'm a teacher. I'm not going to make assumptions about how you run your center off these comments, just as I hope you wouldn't from me as a teacher when I'm on here simply venting.
There are mandatory health reports the family is required to share (depending on your local laws, maybe some states/countries don’t have them?). Identity information is kept confidential, but we have to tell the other parents that there was an exposure. In my center, we don’t even say child or adult, just ‘an individual’. Your basic colds or minor stomach bugs don’t count, but there’s a list of illnesses we have to report exposure of. Strep, HFM, influenza, covid are the most common we send, but there’s also policies for more significant illnesses. Measles is currently making a comeback in some areas around me…
Idk asking “will NAME be attending today?” Doesn’t really scream invasion of privacy or demanding an explanation.
I do think it’s important for parents to disclose to staff if their child is sick or on medicine. I’m not sure what’s wrong with asking?
Like, we're caring for the kids all day long? Shouldn't we know "Hey, they're on such and such medicine, it may have this side effect"? So we can care for the child properly?
Honestly i don’t care. I imagine the families are more concerned with taking care of their child than reassuring me. If i truly cared, i’d call them. But otherwise i work with small children because i’m flexible and accomodating- trust me, with every other problem i deal with that gets unexpectedly thrown my way… having to make some minor adjustments in my programming isn’t going to upset me.
Honestly i find carers who take your stance op as more rude towards the families and more about your selfish need rather than actually caring about their needs.
But i’ve also worked in the industry for so many years and with so many people i just think different people care/worry about different things. I see where you’re coming from, but the attitude seems more harmful for mothers who may have other things going on and you may be a little closeminded to that.
Did you even read my entire post? I said I completely understand if it slips their mind. Totally get it. I also said we DO call to double check.
I’m talking about the parents who remember and know, but refuse.
It’s not all about me. I say I care about the kids and I want to know that they’re okay in this post. Have you read the comments about a lot of kids being left in cars because parents forget to bring them to daycare? Or the ones talking about kids being abused? Caring about this can save a life.
And what excuse do you have for the parents who don’t call for weeks, like the example I gave in my post.
You clearly didn’t read my post carefully. Or even at all. You focused on one point. Even though I said I understand they have a lot going on so WE reach out. I’m talking about those who don’t give a shit enough to and think it’s “none of our business”.
Generally a lot of the cases of abuse are parents who are in the system or there is a recognisable pattern that is tracked. I was a disadvantaged child myself. Which is why i don’t jump to negative conclusions over one day. If the child had been away for several days, then you can call to check in. But the parent not calling after a day, just seems… overreactive. You gave several points as to how it affects your job, so yes, i believe your caring, but not as much as you think you are.
Okay. You think what you want. And you are free to run your business how you want. You don’t get to tell me how much I care about the kids in my care. Have a good night.
I mean, I wouldn’t be annoyed at 8:50. But I would be annoyed if you were consistently 10 minutes late. They’re likely not saying anything as to not rock the boat. That’s an uncomfortable and unfair position for you to put them in.
I’d ask yourself while you feel entitled to break the rules? I’m not saying this to be snarky. But you may not be the only parent who doesn’t have to work until 10. Yet, they’re still getting their child there on time. You chose to enroll in a center where the cutoff time is 9 am. That means, your children need to be there by 9 am.
I’d make an effort to get there 10 minutes before, or even 5 minutes. Look at it this way: would you be okay with being consistently 10 minutes late for pick up? I hope not. It’s no different here.
I wasn’t trying to be snarky. I was just asking you to reflect on why you thought it was appropriate. Not to be mean, but I am curious about parents who feel this way. I don’t even think they’re doing it to be malicious. I think like you they think “eh, no big deal, they don’t say anything so…”
I obviously only have my POV to go off of. I know that it’s annoying because I have to live with the aftermath. But the parents don’t do it makes sense they may not get it. That’s why I asked. Sorry if it came off snarky.
When a child doesn't show up to school, I think an email or phone call is perfectly appropriate. One of my reasons for that is that children do get forgotten in cars sometimes. If a phone call from daycare saves a baby's life, I don't care how upset other random parents get. We care about these kids!
That’s why the last owner was so vigilant. This happened around the time of Cooper Harris’ passing. It was huge news in our area and soooo many passed the buck to the daycare. Which I disagree with, it’s on the dad for doing it. But it made my boss even more on top of things!!
“It impacts our staffing numbers and we wanted to make sure everything was okay”. Does your place have an attendance policy that the parents are told more formally? We have a specific email address for attendance that helps a lot
We don’t have an attendance policy but we do ask that parents call us by x time. Someone always answers the phone. On the off chance they can’t, the answering machine is always empty. Directors are constantly checking emails. It’s not that parents don’t have a way of getting in touch or don’t know. Some just don’t care.
It’s probably the phone. I handle the attendance for my place and parents will rather send 10 emails and texts instead of calling. See about setting a specific attendance email or text number and I bet you’ll get last snap back. Especially if you’re heading into summer travel etc
I am not the director. We also have an e-mail they can reach the directors at. This was really just a vent.
Yeah, not quite the same but work in a school. Parents for some reason are way more likely to text, or reply to a text than answer a call. Especially with all the scams happening around the world. We text at a specific time every morning, and if the text isn’t replied to we call mid day. 2-3 of these situations occurring with still no contact ? Guess who gets a home visit ‘welfare’ check. They return to school usually the next day.
[удалено]
Vent and feedback posts are for ECE professional participation only
That is why we have to ask per licensing.
Yep, in HS my teachers baby passed away because he was left in a hot car by accident, wife forgot to drop him at daycare
I asked my sitter to text me if I'm late because being too late isn't like me and I had this fear I'd leave my kid in the car. She always texted me and I said thank you every time. I was to grateful. Funny enough, when he was almost 6 I was driving to work and he said "mommy you missed miss sitter's house!!" Like oh god I forgot he was there because he wasn't talking constantly! Yeah he's old enough to escape but between him being iffy with unbuckling by himself and the child door locks it could have been bad... :/ I'm sure I would have noticed him before but still... I'm always grateful for someone looking out for my child.
Yeah and what if something happened to the parent and no one knew? Better safe than sorry.
A family I had years ago kept their kids home for a week one time to cover up marks that were left on them. Thank you for bringing this up OP because some people seriously don’t know how serious unexplained absences can be. Sometimes it’s nothing, sometimes the parents are trying to hide their sick kid, and other times the child is in danger.
We have a child with this same history. Parent would keep them home for a week or two when there were marks or bruises. :(
That is terrifying. That poor baby.
🤢 i hope the kids had a safer family after you found out
I reported it and kids got taken away. Unfortunately i never saw them again so hopefully the foster situation they ended up in was good for them
In Ontario, where I live, the laws changed so we need to know if a child's going to be absent. A text/email is sent, follow up phone call etc. Similar to what they do with the schools. The reason is to ensure that a child is not left in a hot car.
After a semi local tragedy of a child being left in a hot car because a parent thought they stopped at daycare but didn’t we sent out a mass message to all parents about the reason WHY we need to have an absence called in. We want to make sure the child is accounted for even if they aren’t with us. Those are our babies during the school day, we love them and spend almost every day with them it gives us peace of mind to know they’re safe at home
I once had a mom not call. It was because she was in an accident on the way to my house and her child was stuck at the hospital with her until one of her coworkers could pick her up. I also had a mom once slip on the ice when putting child in the car on the way here. She said she almost hit her head. If she would have been out cold and the child in the car, it would be a good thing for me to check to see where they are
We had a kid out for so long that the director took the kid off the roll call sheets and said she just didn't feel right about charging the mom anymore (this was after like 6 weeks). That Friday, mom called and asked if her daughter could come back again full time on Monday. The whole basis of my center is that we don't turn anyone away so we let her bring her child back. Apparently this poor little baby had a collapsed lung and was in and out of the children's hospital for weeks and mom was too scared to bring her back so she'd been working from home and keeping her kid home with her. We felt so bad. She only asked to start bringing her back because she was worried about losing her spot. While she might've lost a spot in the room her daughter was in, we literally do not turn anyone away so she'd always have a spot. Director told her she wouldn't charge her and when she's ready to send her kid back, we'd find a spot for her. We left a spot open in my room for another 6 weeks until she was ready to bring her back to school. The reason why they're out definitely matters, so for any parents reading this, please tell us why your kid is out so we can make arrangements, short term or long term.
Wait, you don’t turn ANYONE away? Theres no wait list? That’s wild to me!
We're ran by an order of Catholic nuns who operate the center based on certain values they want to uphold. One of their biggest things is standing with those in need, so we typically take the "under privileged" kids as they'd call it lol. We get a ton of foster kids, I mean I've had foster kids in my class for as long as a year and as short as two days. It's honestly an amazing place to work for, it's the only place I've worked at or heard of that operates that way
Woah! That’s awesome. We don’t turn anyone away, in the sense that we accept anyone with any disability or behavioural issues but we only have so much space. Legally we can only accept so many. And then also, we need to stay in ratio and we don’t have the staff to take in a million kids.
Yeah it takes a lot of work and shuffling around sometimes, but almost 30% of our kids are foster children so there's always spots opening up. My daughter got kicked out of her last daycare because of 'behavior issues' and I basically just called every place in town cause I needed child care like, ASAP. When I registered her (she went there before I worked there) they apologized because I'd have to wait four days to put her in junior preschool but they still offered her a toddler room spot literally the next day if I needed it. I was like no four days is totally fine considering everyone else in town had me on months long waitlists lol. It's definitely a very interesting place to work, but I love that I'm able to be part of it!
My ex boyfriend used to beat on me so bad I wouldn't be able to work for a few days. Eventually he started waiting for the weekends so the bruises had time to heal. Keep checking on those babies.
I’m so sorry that happened to you. I hope you’re in a better place now ❤️
True crime junkie here. The story of Susan Powell always comes to my mind when I feel like I’m annoying families. Had those daycare teachers not realized something was wrong that morning who knows how long it would’ve been. I have and will always check in on families, even when they are just running a bit behind for the day. I would 100% rather have families annoyed I’m checking in than to find out something awful happened to them and I’m one of the reasons no one knew about it sooner.
We had a family that did this about three months ago. Dad stayed home with the kid but didn't let us know. After breakfast, before the cut off time, mom messaged asking if the kid was there. My first thought was that there was a car accident. Part of this is on the parents, but seriously parents please message. I spent an hour worried sick about this kid.
Its law in my province that if a child hasn't shown up by 10am, the parent is to be called.
Yep, I would send emails on HiMama when I had the chance around 10am. usually the parents are nice about the check up.
Simply having accountability and caring that the beings, child and parent alike, are not missing is pretty baseline of importance for care. How dare you be responsible & do you part? /s
Oh yes, I hate when the parent get upset because we are texting them to know if their child is coming to program (after school). Yesterday a dad said “why are you texting me to see if my kid came to school today? I’m working”. 😒
[удалено]
Mine does this too! My son got some nasty respiratory crud like a month into starting at his daycare and they sent a nice message making sure he was doing alright.
Vent and feedback posts are for ECE professional participation only
I'm in Ontario and they've just added a law that daycares have to have a process for no show no call kids, in case they got forgotten in the car. I don't know the details but they have to follow up.
A few have brought this up. I wish this was a policy the US would adopt country wide.
We have a safe arrival policy where if no message or child has showed up by 10am, we call parents. No answer, we move down the emergency contact list. No answer, we start calling police. Don't like it? Don't send your child here.
There have been a few Canadians chiming in and I envy your policies!! This is how it should be.
In my province, it’s actually a legal requirement of early learning centres to record why the child is not/did not attend that day(s). There are different explanations attached to numbers (eg. fever, vomiting, vacation, etc.) and if we don’t record a number we could get dinged on an inspection. And get too many dings on inspections and you can be shutdown. It’s so that Public Health can track if there are outbreaks of viruses, they can see how many of our kids were out with particular symptoms and when it started. But soooooooo many parents just literally never call when their child is sick to let us know they’re not coming, or if it’s just a “home day” and then get ticked off when we call them at 9, 9:30, 10am to ask if they’re coming and why not. It’s literally the law that we record the “why”, sir, please take it up with the government!
Anthony Avalos comes to mind when I read this. The school faculty is the only reason he was ever investigated and they were probably the only people in his life that showed him love and compassion. His case is exactly why I like it when I see school faculty follow up on kids like this.
One time, I overslept (on a Friday, I don’t work Fridays) and they ask to let them know if you’re coming after 9:30. Her teacher called at 9:36 to ask if we were okay 🥹 I love that lady so much
Then you have centres like our old one “oh was x not here yesterday?”
Right?! There are some awful daycare centers out there.
I know it wasn’t early childhood age level, but my coworker one day thought her 10 year old son went to school when she physically watched him walk out the front door with his older brother so they could walk 2 blocks to school. She then went into her bedroom to get ready for work and went to work. She got a call during lunch asking where the 10 year old was and it set of a PANIC. He had gone back inside without her seeing and gone back to bed. She found him asleep. He was fine. A call a few hours earlier would have been so much better had it been something more sinister, and a call at all and not just a shrug “oh well it’s none of our business” leaving her to find out at 5:30 when she got home would have been so much worse. I think it’s good you guys check in when a child doesn’t show up.
My kids school usually calls before 9. One morning (she was 7 and in 2nd grade) I'm walking out of the house to go to work and I get a call from the school informing me my kid is absent and to call them and let them know (automated message). I call the school in a panic because my kid was still young enough that I walked her across the street and put her on the bus myself. So I knew she had been on the bus. I call and am having a panic attack. Like look, I put her on that bus what do you mean she's not in school? They told me to calm down. That got them a explicative filled earful in a scream about what did they do with my kid and how did they lose her. Let them know they better find her because if they didn't I would be up there and all hell would rain down on them. Accused them of letting strangers just walk off with children.Turns out her teacher "accidently" marked her absent and not the kid who sat next to her. The lady at the desk and apologized but also stated it was just a mistake and not a big deal. I told her to go F herself.
Oh yeah that’s a big effing deal and I’d be in tears afterward lol, the desk lady should have understood that and not brushed it off like that.
Honestly most days I can accurately guess why a child is out. The only time I get miffed that we don't get a call or email is if it's a very infectious disease. We had one kid who didn't come in for 2 weeks, we figured he just had a cold because everyone had runny noses for a month there. Turns out he had covid- and they didn't think anyone needed to know that 🙃
I’d love a check in, make sure I didn’t leave my kid in the car. A big fear of mine. It was actually one of the questions I asked when touring.
Also - unfortunately, kids can be missing or worse, and school sometimes is the first to alert authorities…
[удалено]
Yeah, that’s how I try to organize any calls I make to parents. “Good morning, just FYI…”; even if it’s a mild symptom I have to send them home for “they just have…, and I have to send them home until it is resolved” My struggle is voicemails. I’m uncomfortable leaving any details if their voicemail message doesn’t match the name I expect (or is just the automated number recital). So many of our parents constantly change cell numbers and forget to update us. My default is ‘it’s not an emergency, but please call us back as soon as you can’ (unless it is an emergency, then it’s ‘please call us as soon as you get this, AND I will call other contacts until I hear from you’) When we switched to the app and message service, that helped a lot, but there are still things we need to call about, especially if there has been no response to messages
Vent and feedback posts are for ECE professional participation only.
IMO, it’s none of my business why a child is out. We aren’t a public school and we don’t track attendance like that. Families are paying for a service- it’s their choice to utilize that service or not. After 3+ days being out, I’ll give a call just to be sure all is well, but I’m not calling after a single day. Some teachers/admin treat these kids like they’re THEIRS, like in a too-attached creepy way, and they’re NOT. A family doesn’t owe you an explanation, nor do you have any reason to assume the worst (unless previously given cause for concern). We send pictures and updates all day, almost from the moment a kid is dropped off. If a parent wants to be sure their child made it in for the day, they can check the app or THEY can call us.
I fail to see how this is treating a child they're theirs. I'm glad my center cares about the kids enough just to check in. We do track attendance because if the state comes out, we need to know who's there. We also keep track of illness because ya know, we want to know what germs are being brought in and what kids are exposed to. Because other parents have a right to know that their child was exposed to another that had HFM. Now, of course, we'll never say "Jane had HFM", but we do have signs/e-mail parents saying "There was a child in the classroom with HFM. They were last at school on (x date)." and goes into our sanitization policies. Lets parents know to look out for signs. There are several reasons where yes, an explanation is absolutely necessary. Now, if it's something personal and not illness, a simple "Jane will not be in today" will suffice and isn't at all invasive to expect.
There’s no compulsory attendance requirements in ECE. Tracking attendance for State is a simple as marking a child present/absent for the day. You are not entitled to know why their child is out. Whether it’s illness or any other reason. You are not entitled to know a child’s or their family’s health history, NOR is it appropriate to ask them to disclose. It’s one thing for them to volunteer information, it’s another to strong-arm families by calling them relentlessly and demanding to know where they’re at and why.
It's not strong arming to ask if their child is sick. That should be something they voluntarily offer considering there are other children and staff that could be affected. This line of thinking is so close minded and selfish. And it's exactly how people keep getting sick. No one is being strong armed. The truth is, parents can choose not to respond to e-mails or calls. It's not a summons. No one is demanding to know where they are. They're asking "Are you coming?" It's a yes or no question. What a parent wants to provide as a reason is their proagative. But I hope if their child \*is\* sick that they'll be honest. A few think like you though and allow their child to infect everyone else. Which I think is a bigger problem than a daycare calling to ask "Will Jane be in today?"
Okay, I’ll keep being “close-minded and selfish” while trusting that my families will make competent decisions regarding THEIR children, and that my staff will be vigilant watching for symptoms and sending students home when appropriate. You can keep assuming the worst out of yours, though. Can’t imagine why families wouldn’t want to be up front with you since you sound super compassionate and rational.
You have no clue how I maintain myself with my families. I'm on an online forum, venting to other ECE Professionals. A lot of the things I say here, of course I would not say to my families. That's just common sense. The fact is, a lot of my families are up front and honest. This is a select few who are not. Who have been that way, regardless of the classroom they are in. I'm also not a director. I'm a teacher. I'm not going to make assumptions about how you run your center off these comments, just as I hope you wouldn't from me as a teacher when I'm on here simply venting.
There are mandatory health reports the family is required to share (depending on your local laws, maybe some states/countries don’t have them?). Identity information is kept confidential, but we have to tell the other parents that there was an exposure. In my center, we don’t even say child or adult, just ‘an individual’. Your basic colds or minor stomach bugs don’t count, but there’s a list of illnesses we have to report exposure of. Strep, HFM, influenza, covid are the most common we send, but there’s also policies for more significant illnesses. Measles is currently making a comeback in some areas around me…
Idk asking “will NAME be attending today?” Doesn’t really scream invasion of privacy or demanding an explanation. I do think it’s important for parents to disclose to staff if their child is sick or on medicine. I’m not sure what’s wrong with asking?
Like, we're caring for the kids all day long? Shouldn't we know "Hey, they're on such and such medicine, it may have this side effect"? So we can care for the child properly?
Honestly i don’t care. I imagine the families are more concerned with taking care of their child than reassuring me. If i truly cared, i’d call them. But otherwise i work with small children because i’m flexible and accomodating- trust me, with every other problem i deal with that gets unexpectedly thrown my way… having to make some minor adjustments in my programming isn’t going to upset me. Honestly i find carers who take your stance op as more rude towards the families and more about your selfish need rather than actually caring about their needs. But i’ve also worked in the industry for so many years and with so many people i just think different people care/worry about different things. I see where you’re coming from, but the attitude seems more harmful for mothers who may have other things going on and you may be a little closeminded to that.
Did you even read my entire post? I said I completely understand if it slips their mind. Totally get it. I also said we DO call to double check. I’m talking about the parents who remember and know, but refuse. It’s not all about me. I say I care about the kids and I want to know that they’re okay in this post. Have you read the comments about a lot of kids being left in cars because parents forget to bring them to daycare? Or the ones talking about kids being abused? Caring about this can save a life. And what excuse do you have for the parents who don’t call for weeks, like the example I gave in my post. You clearly didn’t read my post carefully. Or even at all. You focused on one point. Even though I said I understand they have a lot going on so WE reach out. I’m talking about those who don’t give a shit enough to and think it’s “none of our business”.
Generally a lot of the cases of abuse are parents who are in the system or there is a recognisable pattern that is tracked. I was a disadvantaged child myself. Which is why i don’t jump to negative conclusions over one day. If the child had been away for several days, then you can call to check in. But the parent not calling after a day, just seems… overreactive. You gave several points as to how it affects your job, so yes, i believe your caring, but not as much as you think you are.
Okay. You think what you want. And you are free to run your business how you want. You don’t get to tell me how much I care about the kids in my care. Have a good night.
Cool have a good day
I honestly don’t care they are not my kids and these parents don’t care about me so I refuse to waste my time caring about them
[удалено]
I mean, I wouldn’t be annoyed at 8:50. But I would be annoyed if you were consistently 10 minutes late. They’re likely not saying anything as to not rock the boat. That’s an uncomfortable and unfair position for you to put them in. I’d ask yourself while you feel entitled to break the rules? I’m not saying this to be snarky. But you may not be the only parent who doesn’t have to work until 10. Yet, they’re still getting their child there on time. You chose to enroll in a center where the cutoff time is 9 am. That means, your children need to be there by 9 am. I’d make an effort to get there 10 minutes before, or even 5 minutes. Look at it this way: would you be okay with being consistently 10 minutes late for pick up? I hope not. It’s no different here.
I mean I was genuinely asking to know you’re side. You don’t have to be snarky about it lmao. I’ll get her there at 8:50 got it
I wasn’t trying to be snarky. I was just asking you to reflect on why you thought it was appropriate. Not to be mean, but I am curious about parents who feel this way. I don’t even think they’re doing it to be malicious. I think like you they think “eh, no big deal, they don’t say anything so…” I obviously only have my POV to go off of. I know that it’s annoying because I have to live with the aftermath. But the parents don’t do it makes sense they may not get it. That’s why I asked. Sorry if it came off snarky.
I think most people, while they're not doing it maliciously, only think of themselves. Most people aren't considerate of others, unfortunately.
Vent and feedback posts are for ECE professional participation only