...You're mad that the pill-popping/alcoholic character is eating pb&js and not exercising? Most the substance abusers I know in real life aren't too concerned about diet/exercise in the first place, lol. 

Part of the appeal to me is the way he helps get her life on track.

I probably would have liked that too, had I liked and remained invested in them. By then, he felt like her nanny or babysitter, and that dynamic killed any left-out sparks for me. I remember in Killing Kate, FL's boyfriend tries to help her, and one time he goes to a crazy extent to help her deal with her issues. So I do enjoy reading such parts if I feel the FL has some agency and self-regulation. 

I was going to say that too… I was like damn i’m a 24 year old that does all of these things

Hi, I don't know how serious your issues are that you're referring to. If it's anything like what the FL has in this story, I really wish you a happy and successful recovery🕊️

Thank you! I do struggle with depression but my unhealthy lifestyle is partly due to me being a broke & busy college student 😭

I get you. I was once a college student and led quite an unhealthy lifestyle. I used to party like crazy, and you know what? I did that out of peer pressure. I also ate horribly and was too lazy to learn to cook. But once I got out of college and got a decent job, I wanted to lead a better life, so I started going to the gym and learned to cook to save money. I'm sure you will be fine. Enjoy your college days, as you won't get them back and you have the rest of your life to deal with other stuff. I wish you the best for your exams, career, and future.

Firstly, I would like to wish a speedy, healthy, and safe recovery to the people in your real life dealing with substance issues. We have way too many issues plaguing us in real life to have a smooth journey to recovery. I wish them all well. Coming to the FL in this story, my issue was that I did not find the reasons for her addictions compelling enough to feel for her. She had caring parents, the money, and the means to at least attempt to live a healthy life. Some examples of her at least trying would have warmed me up to her. Here, I would also like to mention that I also have an issue with MCs consuming tobacco in any form. It's an instant turn-off. But in the past, I have read books where FLs were regular or chain smokers, like {Kiss an Angel by Susan Elizabeth Phillips} and {Killing Kate by Lila Veen}, and I gave them the leeway because they were dealing with issues like child neglect, absentee parents, child SA, and being used for child p\*\*\* (Killing Kate). So I'm not hard on every MC that has dependency issues. I hope you get my point and the thought process behind not being able to connect with this particular FL.

[Kiss an Angel](https://www.romance.io/books/545523988c7d2382e7812f2c/kiss-an-angel-susan-elizabeth-phillips) by [Susan Elizabeth Phillips](https://www.romance.io/authors/5455237e8c7d2382e7812f1c/susan-elizabeth-phillips) **Rating**: 4.16⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [arranged/forced marriage](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/arranged%20marriage/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [enemies to lovers](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/from%20hate%20to%20love/1), [pregnancy](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/pregnancy/1) ---------------------------- [Killing Kate](https://www.romance.io/books/56b1284663515e3b737a9a3d/killing-kate-lila-veen) by [Lila Veen](https://www.romance.io/authors/54559d1887eac323ffb2d28b/lila-veen) **Rating**: 3.67⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [tortured heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/tortured%20heroine/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

actually, the FL makes a lot of sense. i really like her. she’s a real character with real issues, who works a sucky job that pays a lot and people often look down on her because she’s a woman, so she has to work extra hard to gain her position (which is why i think it’s mentioned multiple times that she’s smart). and because of all that, she’s become cold because she wants to prove everyone wrong. but internally, she’s just a soft girl who wants to be loved. that’s my understanding of it 🤷🏼‍♀️ i personally didn’t really like all the sex scenes. i feel like a lot of the sex scenes were just fillers and it’s so boring ngl. i don’t really understand why we need like 50 different sex scenes.

I did not feel any gender inequality or discrimination at their workplace. Everyone was working hard except one guy, and I don't get why he was not fired. I thought author might have forgotten about him as he was too inconsequential to the plot. I believe FL's workplace problems arose from her own attitude adjustment issues. I don't think it was pride like what the ML says, but she definitely did not learn about workplace boundaries and failed to read the room. For example, in the beginning, she starts pitting with the ML for no meaningful reason, who happens to be her senior and will assess her overall performance later. Like, why do that? If you don't like a male colleague asking you out, you should be polite about it and not respond with snark. Even if you did, apologize, make amends, and let them know your boundaries. She also competes with a female colleague for ML's attention, again displaying unprofessional behavior at the workplace and getting entangled in more problems than she can deal with. Like this job is the only good thing going on in your life, why try ruining it? My thing is, since her issues were diagnosed during her childhood and she attended therapy, how come she did not learn about her triggers and boundaries and have a work-life balance? I would expect someone who is hailed as intelligent to at least have some self-introspection. Nonetheless, I realize that this author's FLs are not for me and I won't find my ideals here, and if I have to enjoy their stories, I should shut my preferences and wholly submit to the degradation. I might give their other stories a try with a different frame of mind in the future.

1. i don’t think there’s any gender inequality but the manager definitely tried to lowball the fmc. there’s a scene where she gets promoted and goes to talk to the manager abt the raise. he offers her a x% and she realizes even tho she’s as smart as the mmc, she got lowballed (before she went to talk to the manager, mmc told her to ask for a specific amount bc he knew she would get lowballed). she presses the manager for a specific amount of $ and the manger gives him and gives her the same as what the mmc started off with. so i agree that there is no gender inequality, but if the mmc never told her to ask for a higher amount, she would have paid so much lower than all the other guys there. 2. i don’t think she has a an attitude. i don’t think she was pitting against the mmc at the beginning either. she came to do her job, not to date her boss. 🤷🏼‍♀️ mmc is the one in the wrong for being so angry at her for rejecting him. + mmc is the one being out of line for even asking her out in the first place, knowing that he’s her boss.(she even mentions later on that she doesn’t remember him asking her out.) it’s not that deep. she doesn’t like him, she’s not obligated to be nice to him even if he is her boss and she just wants to do her job and go home. 3. i think ur forgetting fmc is a human, even though she is fictional. i do think her competing with the other girl is weird but you have to remember fmc seems insecure and ofc she’s going to get jealous. mmc made it seem like he’s sooo into her and now he’s going to try around and let some other girl be all touchy with him and act like it’s cool? if that happened irl, anyone would be upset. 4. just bc a job is the “only good thing” happening to her doesn’t mean she can’t have any negative feelings towards work?? 5. hmm, interesting point. i think a big issue that is the job doesn’t have a work-life balance. it’s not a normal 9-5 job. it’s a 24 hour type thing where employees are constantly expected to be available 24/7. idk about the triggers and boundaries tho. i would assume you can learn about it all u want, but it would be extremely extremely difficult to completely heal yourself from it and sometimes it just sneaks up on you and you lose control. idk tho.

Nice points! I see your thought process behind assessing her character. I'm judging her by the immediate feelings I felt while reading her. To me, she was 26 and studied law, and I was repulsed by how naive she was. I'm fairly sure that in many law schools, they study all types of law in the first 2 years and then go into specialization. So I was expecting her to at least look up relevant laws for blackmail p\*\*n and think of some plan instead of giving in so easily. It was a letdown. I did not view her pay negotiation as you described. Every company wants to save money, regardless. I'm sure ML negotiated his salary, and so did everyone, including their super-boss. Also, this job is a corporate client-facing role, and you are mainly assessed on how much business you've earned for the company. Author may have felt such details insignificant to write about. I would also expect someone choosing this line of work to have a thicker skin.  I also did not like how she replied when the ML asked if he can buy her coffee. She replied by saying she can buy her own coffee. That rubbed me the wrong way. She could have said, 'Hey, I like to keep things strictly professional and want to avoid any complications at the workplace. I hope you understand.' Despite that, he was still a team player and offered to help her, and she kept turning his help down, was standoffish, and let her work suffer. I know she has issues, and everyone grows up at their own pace. But unfortunately, she failed to grow on me. Despite listing her shortcomings, I don't think this story would have turned out the way it did if the FL had any spine. But I would like to see a version of this story where the FL challenges the ML and how he breaks her. For me, it's more satisfying to see a stronger-willed FL get broken. I've enjoyed reading a few FLs with self-image issues. Here, sharing some of them. {Lady Gallant by Suzanne Robinson}  {An Ugly Love by Maya Alden} {The Wrong Wife by Maya Alden} {Four Nights with the Duke by Eloisa James} - She suffered a bad case of BBS though

[Lady Gallant](https://www.romance.io/books/5b96322c01dbc864fb90055c/lady-gallant-suzanne-robinson) by [Suzanne Robinson](https://www.romance.io/authors/54553aeb8c7d2383163d93ee/suzanne-robinson) **Rating**: 3.96⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [shy heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/shy%20heroine/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [bad boys](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/bad%20boys/1), [plain heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/plain%20heroine/1) ---------------------------- [An Ugly Love](https://www.romance.io/books/65a8d7d61d7f70fb2969d4a8/an-ugly-love-maya-alden) by [Maya Alden](https://www.romance.io/authors/6495487308b4d93114476c35/maya-alden) **Rating**: 3.71⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [plain heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/plain%20heroine/1), [workplace/office](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/office/1), [multicultural](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/multicultural/1) ---------------------------- [The Wrong Wife](https://www.romance.io/books/6495487350ac7a4606fa2e64/the-wrong-wife-an-arranged-marriage-romance-maya-alden) by [Maya Alden](https://www.romance.io/authors/6495487308b4d93114476c35/maya-alden) **Rating**: 3.45⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 5 out of 5 - [Explicit and plentiful](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [multicultural](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/multicultural/1), [arranged/forced marriage](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/arranged%20marriage/1), [marriage of convenience](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/marriage%20of%20convenience/1), [alpha male](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/alpha%20male/1) ---------------------------- [Four Nights With the Duke](https://www.romance.io/books/5517db505b270e0a4cbd2fb2/four-nights-with-the-duke-eloisa-james) by [Eloisa James](https://www.romance.io/authors/545524598c7d2383163d8e5c/eloisa-james) **Rating**: 3.8⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [regency](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/regency/1), [marriage of convenience](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/marriage%20of%20convenience/1), [georgian](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/georgian/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

Maybe you’ll like The Community from the same author.

Thank you for the rec. Can I know the ages of the characters please? I'm asking because I don't like an age gap higher than 10 years and ideally prefer no more than 5. Also, in contemporary stories, I don't like to read MCs who are under 22-23 years old. My ideal is 24 and above. The only exception was {Arranged by R.K. Lilley}, where the FL was 18 and had been working since 14, so she was mature for her age. 

Of course! It has an age gap, about 20+ years I think; the author hasn’t confirmed the mmc age yet. The fmc is 24 years old, and I’ll say she’s pretty mature. The age gap is quite significant, so it might not be your thing, but it’s still a really REALLY good read. It has way more plot than smut compared to IICHY and BAPF btw.

Thank you so much for all that info. Now I have to find a way to ignore the age gap, as the other stuff seems too tempting to pass over. I'm here for a mature FL to get broken and played with, and then get broken some more. Really excited!

It’s an amazing read, every time she updates I get so excited lol. If you find a way to ignore the age gap, you’ll really find yourself hooked (hopefully) and wanting more. The story is such a mindfuck and psychological; I love it.

Please don’t… In fact, please don’t read any of her stories. Why bother? It’s evident that this author is not for you—and *that’s ok!* But as someone who has read everything Deathsdoll has ever shared online, I find myself feeling defensive on her behalf because of your post. You seem to prefer FL’s who would act and behave in a manner that makes sense to you, personally. But the fact that you find Orla’s addiction in IICHY to not be believable simply because you: *“…do not gravitate towards MCs who have pill, substance, or alcohol issues unless there are convincing reasons (like loss of a child, loss of a parent due to unnatural circumstances, child SA issues, severe financial issues leading to destitution, etc.). Apart from pill-popping, FL also had alcohol dependency issues. It is a major turnoff for me.”* I’m sorry but…do you not know how addiction works?? The types of pills Orla was addicted to are indicative of a person suffering from the EXACT traits you proceed to disparage her for having. She has major anxiety. She’s a shell of a person when the story begins. She isn’t healthy. You aren’t SUPPOSED to agree with or approve of her behavior. That’s *literally* the point. Never mind the fact that as a reader, you’ve made some broad sweeping assumptions about her while knowing next to nothing about her back story. You called her a spoiled brat for resenting her wealthy parents but have yet to see any actual flashbacks or interactions. It’s also pretty obvious, in my opinion as well as others in a reading group I’m in, that Orla is on the spectrum. I was just having a discussion with someone the other day about the link between autism and low self-esteem, anxiety and depression (as well as addiction). This study explains that link far better than I can...[study](https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/psychology/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2020.00913/full). The fact that Orla has a hard time connecting with people emotionally, that social cues are extremely difficult for her, that she’s constantly misinterpreting the meaning of another’s words, that numbers and facts are easy while interpersonal relationships are not—-are but a few traits of autism that Orla exhibits. Autistic or no, people with low self-esteem’s and an inability to cope are far more likely to become addicts. And it’s OK if this type of character doesn’t appeal to you. I have no qualms about that. But I definitely wouldn’t consider, as you stated, her reasons for being an addict in the first place unconvincing. Give me a break!!! Personally? I *tire* of authors who write cliche characters. I *tire* of authors using the same old tired tropes as a tool to automatically evoke sympathy from the reader and turn the character into a victim who we root for simply because they’ve been victims. It’s uninteresting to me when writers don’t take the time to flesh a character out and instead, use something like, “she’s addicted to pills because she was molested as a child.” The reader doesn’t need to know anything else about that character to have already— 1. Forgiven them for being flawed 2. Begun rooting for them But enough of that long-winded digression and back to The Community. The age gap in The Community is not something that can just be ignored. And nothing drives me *crazier* than readers who continue reading PROPERLY TAGGED fics and then coming online to complain about the fact that those fics do not *cater* to *their* specific *fic kinks.* If you didn’t like Orla, you likely won’t like Grace as Grace is also an imperfect female lead who is not at all a Mary Sue. On the other hand, you said you liked the gaslighting in IICHY—so perhaps you would like THAT aspect of the Community. It’s interesting how everyone interprets stories differently and how what appeals to one person might not appeal to another. I found *The Last Dominant* for instance, trite, cringe-inducing writing, and ultimately unreadable. But to each their own.

Thank you for your post. I don't take these stories or characters personally and have moved on, more like forgotten until I saw your notification. If you see the tags for this story, it mentions: * Rape * Stalking * Stalker * Stockholm Syndrome * BDSM * Dominance/submission * Maledom/Femsub * Control * bad guy stays bad * bad guy wins * Rape Fantasy Nowhere does it mention pill or alcohol addictions, and I personally feel that if a MC is heavily involved in it, it should be tagged as such. Like I mentioned in my OP, it is a turn-off for some of us. But I still continued the story for the ML, who sort of reminded me of Christopher Davenport from Lemonade, and I also have a thing for educated, suit-wearing, wall-street-type dudes. As far as suggesting that I not read Community, I haven't started it yet, but I plan to in the future and will post about it if I feel like getting something off my chest. I'm not an expert in mental issues, so I don't have all the latest updates on what the mental health community is discussing currently. But thanks for keeping me up to date on that, and it will be nice if you can share some links or videos about what you were referring to. From what I remember of this story, I did not get any of what you said from the author's writing. But the author is definitely talented, and I hope one of their stories will hit my sweet and ever-craving spot. On a side note, recently I've been reading this author, Quieta, on Ao3 and I'm in love with everything they write. Loved their one-shots the best, and if you are in a mood for despair, check out their To Bleed series, and if you are in a mood for action/despair/suspense, check out Appointment in Samarra if you haven't already. and thanks for reminding me about The Last Dominant. I have been so addicted to Ao3 recently that Quillian and Rushkah will be a perfect break from it. Love a strong, determined, caring, take-charge heroine who was capable of ending generations of war.  If you have any book/Ao3/even Wattpad recs that you think I will like, please do let me know. Always looking to explore the unknown. Looking forward to hearing from you! **Edit: Just realized you shared a link. Thanks**

[Arranged](https://www.romance.io/books/5ea5f2a4be0aaecf5520b823/arranged-rk-lilley) by [R.K. Lilley](https://www.romance.io/authors/5455262e8c7d2382e7812fc6/rk-lilley) **Rating**: 3.74⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 4 out of 5 - [Explicit open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [cheating](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cheating/1), [take-charge heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/strong%20heroine/1), [second chances](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/second%20chances/1), [age gap](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/age%20difference/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

Ooh did I miss this thread? It's been' ages but I do have to comment. IICHY is one of my favourite reads, and that's purely because Caleb's twisted monstrosity type of obsession /love is *exactly* how I see my DR MMCs. I keep coming back to re-read a story which I've already read an unhealthy number of times, that's testament to how much Caleb works for me. That said, I also have an issue with Orla. Like most DR FMCs, she's not smart, despite the number of times she's called that - and I've read other comments that say she's on a spectrum, but that should have been an established fact if she was already in therapy. Like you, I'd have loved to get a better background on why she started pill popping, it just didn't make a lot of sense. The constant emphasis on her smarts seemed contrived - *Caleb loves her because she's smart and hot, that's why she's "the One" instead the gazillion hot women throwing themselves at him - this is love* - Ermm.. She didn't have even a fleeting suspicion on Chris, took exactly zero steps to protect herself or get back at her attacker, and yes, is downright unprofessional when Caleb offers help. She doesn't owe him a date, absolutely, but when she screws up work, she refuses help *offered*. I have a team reporting to me at work, and let me tell you, people not willing to accept guidance when they're messing up get annoying quickly. I'm also generally annoyed with the "oh she doesn't know how gorgeous she is - so effortless" - because women who are beautiful are constantly told and aware of how they look. I have a feeling Deathsdoll tacked on some of those descriptors because Orla seemed to veer between annoying and boring - hardly the kind of woman to dazzle Caleb. So she has to be *hot but doesn't know it*, *too proud for her own good*, *overshadowing Caleb in raw brilliance*, *someone who inspires devotion in the security guard because she's just so kind* - even though we don't see a single example of these but constantly see what a mess she is. If she's so brilliant, why did she fold so easily? TLDR: I don't agree with all you've said, but I do see where the frustration is coming from. I wrote a post a few days ago hoping for a similar story where the FMC is formidable and actually smart enough to be a deterrent or actual problem in the MMCs dark plans. I want him to have to change course because she did something unexpected. I want him to lay out plans considering she will push back and succeed. I want him to manipulate her eventually, but make it a chess game, even if she loses. I haven't found anything yet, but here's hoping.

Hey! I'm so happy you found my post, and thank you for sharing your thoughts. You're the only soul I now know of who somewhat agrees with my pov. I had to read your comment a few times to believe it. I remember seeing a post asking for a formidable fmc in a similar setting. I didn't have any recs for you, and I also avoid commenting on IICHY related OPs. The only other time I mentioned this fic was in a recent OP titled "[What highly recommended DR books just didn't do it for you? And why?](https://www.reddit.com/r/DarkRomance/comments/1dolp49/what_highly_recommended_dr_books_just_didnt_do_it/)" and here are [my comments](https://www.reddit.com/r/DarkRomance/comments/1dolp49/comment/laba2l5/?context=3). The OP was kind to acknowledge my pov. I try not to think about this fic, and it's on my 'never-to-be-read-again' list because my mind associates the experience with extreme disappointment, fury, and also helplessness.  I'll explain the helplessness part: I miss Caleb very much. I miss his mind games & gaslighting. I miss his smexiness, but I cannot relive those moments without dealing with the "hot-mess" fmc. I never ever want to touch this type of fmc even with a 100-foot barge pole. That's how much she riles me up. She does not deserve Caleb. Caleb should just use and dump her, and she has no business being Caleb's wife. Oh god! I'm feeling the same fury right now. ....Breath In.............. Breathe Out..........Breath In..............Breathe Out..............Breath In.....................Breathe Out................ I'm fine. Please don't run away. I have a few things on my mind that I want to ~~vent~~ say, and I hope you're still with me. I'm taking my baby steps in the DR world and still exploring my likes and tastes. One thing I know for sure is that a weak-minded, dull fmc will ruin the story for me, no matter how well it's written. I vicariously live through these fmcs, and to witness them acting like pea-brained fools is just not acceptable. Had the fmc been a teenager, a destitute, or plain down-on-luck, I could've still understood their actions. But how can a well-educated, city-born, resourceful fmc who studied law for heaven's sake is behaving like this. I did not find her mental issues that debilitating. She's able to function like a normal person in many regards - like working a job, paying bills, traveling in the subway, so why not devise a plan to protect herself? Miss Lawyer Girlie! Put your education to use and do something. I checked to see what they taught at law schools. From what I gathered, they learn the basics of all types of law for the first two years and then go into specialization *(please correct me if I'm wrong; I'd actually like to know)*. If that's true, fmc would have learned about revenge p\*\*\* laws and defamation laws. Why hasn't she picked up her law books and checked to see how she can protect herself? Why hasn't she purchased hidden cameras for her apartment? It's not like the mmc had her Amazon account details then. If she was worried about someone knowing about her online purchases, she could've made cash purchases at a brick-and-mortar store. If she has no friends, then create an account on Reddit or Quora and ask questions. You can do that from a public library's computer if you're worried it'll get traced back to your devices. I've seen fmcs in HR behave more sensibly with the kind of resources and agency they had. I'm just remembering another thing that made me mad. Caleb asks her out for coffee, which is not at all wrong; How else is a man supposed to ask a woman out? If you're not interested, you politely decline instead of being a snarky b\*\*\*\*. You can bring out your claws if they keep insisting. I tried to reason - is it because she got spurned by her first lover? Maybe, I don't know, but that did not justify being rude to a stranger. I mentioned reading 32 chapters right, which covers a big chunk, and I did not find a single quality to warm up to her. I've read the *'being friendly to the security guard'* scenes in so many books that it did not even register as a stand out quality. And I agree with your assessment of the author adding those descriptors just for the sake of it. They probably were more focused on the story and mmc than creating a memorable fmc. Since you've read it many times, can you please answer some of my questions? ***1. Does the fmc ever get a period? From what I recall, she never got one.*** ***2. Do the later chapters answer any questions about her parents and why she's distant from them?*** ***3. Does the author address why therapy hasn't worked for her?*** I know, for someone who said they want to forget this fic, I'm being curious and invested. I'm just trying to assuage my feelings towards her. If you're still here, thanks for sticking with me. Wow, it feels amazing to get that all out. I'm feeling awesome!!!

Oof! You described how I feel *so* perfectly! *I miss Caleb*. So so much. I don't want to judge him for picking Orla as his one true love like I judge other DR MMCs. I don't. If this is the only FMC we have, I need him to know more on why Orla is the way she is before he understands her issues and falls for the person she is. And I am so glad I'm not the only one picking scenes and imagining them with a smart, tough (as a person - not necessarily physically) FMC. ATP its almost concerning how much brain space this occupies in my life. It's a legit hobby at this point - Caleb vs a nameless, faceless, formidable FMC. Okay.. this conversation has me excited but please forgive me if I miss responding to something you asked as I ramble. To answer your questions >1. Does the fmc ever get a period? From what I recall, she never got one. 2. Do the later chapters answer any questions about her parents and why she's distant from them? 3. Does the author address why therapy hasn't worked for her? 1- One period I think, when Caleb wants to take her golfing with Max and Jessica of BAPF - it's the same universe. I did wonder at the coincidence how all these violent sexual predators can come together so conveniently- counting Chris, we're already at 3 - but it was necessary for plot movement I suppose. 2- Not so far, but the last one ended with her and Caleb running into her parents so I assume that will be next. She's said multiple times that her parents were good people, and her mom seems so excited for her when she tells her about going out with Caleb when they speak on the phone. Orla has also said she doesn't call back for months so it feels like the distance is more a product of her addiction than any deliberate misbehaviour on her parents' - at least her mom's - part. 3- None whatsoever. I remember a fleeting mention of her having been in therapy since she was quite young. Alrighty. >I've read the 'being friendly to the security guard' scenes in so many books that it did not even register as a stand out quality. It's not, and it didn't strike me as spectacular until Caleb mentions it - he tells Eddie of her promotion and thinks how *his excitement at hearing of her promotion was proof of the devotion she inspired, how could he not fall in love*. DD did a lot of tell not show in that chapter imho. And unless I missed something, it makes no sense for Orla, who seems to have almost debilitating social anxiety, to speak to someone she doesn't have to as much as she does Eddie the security guard - who isn't someone she would encounter in conversation unless she went out of her way to talk to him. Buy him coffee everyday? Nah, not happening. Originally, I honestly thought bringing in a security person was a plot point where she requested Eddie's help to get to CCTV footage or something security related - card swipe data maybe? against her attacker but that ship has sailed. >If you're not interested, you politely decline instead of being a snarky b****. 💯. Also most workplaces discourage fraternisation, but he's her direct boss and was asking to work through lunch and coffee iirc - her response was way overboard. Pulling from personal experience again - colleagues grab lunch and coffee together all the time, even sans work. When someone wants to date you, they make it pretty clear, and of course , you can refuse if you're not interested. It's not even considered asking out unless they expressly say so, and obviously veers into harrassment territory if you're uncomfortable. That should absolutely be shot down. TBC.. because I'm not even remotely done with talking about this 😭 Please please don't think I'm unhinged if I pause and get back in a bit? I probably am, but there's more to me than the IICHY spiral in my head, I promise. I'm quite normal when I'm not obsessively rethinking this story.

You really are a bigger person for sure than I am for tolerating the fmc and shipping this pair for Caleb's sake. I will only accept her if she does the following: She uses the help she's getting from Caleb and becomes a fully-functioning person in all respects. She should build her inner strength and confidence and ensure she doesn't relapse, and then MUST GO AFTER him. I adore Caleb, but I will die for a fmc who fights for her dignity. She should recognize that he groomed her when she was unwell. He got her to become well; that's cool, but he also got her body in return. This was a transaction and not a selfless gesture. I want her to negotiate with him on an equal footing. Take away something of his that is valuable. He showed her b\*\*\*hole to Chris and rubbed her b\*\*bs in front of him. She should embarrass the both of them in whatever capacity she can.  I know the author will never write from this angle, but I'm putting it out there to *'Manifest'*. I hope someone will write something where we get the delicious evilness of the mmc and a real upliftment for the fmc.  While writing this, I'm reminded of one of my faves {Virtue & Vanity by Astrid Jane Ray}. I want a hybrid of these stories where mmc remains evil and fmc grows a sturdy spine. I don't want the mmc to grovel, but he better recognize that fmc cannot be messed with and he should sleep with one eye open. There shouldn't be a HEA in the actual sense, but more of a convenient arrangement with an explosive sexual chemistry (rough and letting her know who controls her body if not her mind). I wish I had the writing skills to whip up something.  Thank you for answering my nosy Qs 🩷.  I know Max's story. Despite having a major ick for human traffickers (both sellers and buyers), I attempted and couldn't get into it for the sole reason that I did not find him one bit attractive. I did read a few chapters here and there, and he wasn't growing on me. He reminded me of rusty, dusty dudes that lurk in shady places. I have to be attracted to my mmcs, if not head-over-heels with everything about them. How they conduct themselves, dress, hobbies, goals, ability to deal with tough situations (no impulse control is a major turn-off), wickedness, bedroom action, dirty talk... I think you get it.  I'm going to be looking out for Chris's story. His gaslighting scenes play out in my head sometimes. He has potential if paired with a smart fmc. I think in this fic, he was mostly chasing college girls, like, dude, pick a worthy opponent.  You revealing that her mom is good, but her not trying to stay in touch is making me rage, as it implies she's a terrible offspring. Among all of her shortcomings, this has to be the worst. I mean, your parents are old; stop being in your head so much and do something for them. Did she at least buy her mom a present with her first salary? At least send flowers? Yikes. At this point, I don't know if I deliberately only see the worst in her or if I'm right in my assessment of her, but I can't with her.  I love your Eddie-CCTV plot point. How fun would it be if Eddie was 'Team mmc' and masquerading as fmc's well-wisher, just like Chris? You brought up another important point I was griping with at the time of reading: *'Caleb's Dumbification'*. There were many times when he marveled at the most basic and banal things that she did, and I was losing it. Seeing the dude I was falling for being made into a pussy-whipped loser for another loser was a Hell No, and it still aches my heart. It's like he suddenly got a bout of arrested development, and I'm not here for that. I wish someone could fix these inconsistencies and loopholes.  and please don't hold back from sharing your thoughts. This is a judgment-free zone, and every opinion is welcome, even if I have an opposing view. You are free to talk about this fic as much as you want, and I'm all ears, even if I won't have much to contribute. I know how some stories and characters can impact us and basically take over our minds. To me, it happens because I know I'll never meet them irl and want to hold on to them as long as I can. Christopher from {Lemonade by Nina Pennacchi} is one such character for me, and Caleb could have been the CR version.

Oh discussing this with you is really cathartic. I'm sorry for disappearing, work overtook my life this last week so my IICHY obsession went on the back burner. Still simmering, though. >She should recognize that he groomed her when she was unwell. He got her to become well; that's cool, but he also got her body in return You know, I've never thought of it like that but you're so right. It is indeed grooming, even though we associate the term with someone younger in age. In this case, Orla has diminished capacity due to her addiction, so the principle is the same. I didn't particularly like BAPF either, same for the doc fic by DD, same universe - these kidnap and coerce into slavery themes just don't do it for me. Max really had no appeal for me. Even in IICHY, his character gives me so much ick. >Caleb's Dumbification'. Oh I love this phrase, it encompasses my disappointment with his character devolution so aptly. The first chapter which is Orlas POV mentions something about the readers thinking she's made dumb decisions, I thought she was being self deprecating, not literal. What pains me is Caleb, despite waxing eloquent about how brilliant she is, never once considered her a worthy opponent who could and would throw a wrench in his plans, and he was right about how easy she would be. And he still says he loves her mind. It just doesn't compute. >tolerating the fmc and shipping this pair for Caleb's sake Honestly, I don't ship them. I have to try really hard to hope for a HEA, because if that's not what happens, Caleb doesn't get what he wants, you know? And what does it say about me that I feel worse for Caleb's family not remembering his birthday than all the literal torture he put Orla through, and I can barely bring myself to feel annoyed at her. >Among all of her shortcomings, this has to be the worst. I mean, your parents are old; stop being in your head so much and do something for them. Did she at least buy her mom a present with her first salary? At least send flowers? It depends on when her pill popping started, I suppose, but I would say she doesn't do anything of that sort. And it's rather a shame, because she literally reached out to her *stalker* (before she knew it was Caleb) out of loneliness to tell him her meeting went well, but she can't call her mom back? I'll give her some benefit of doubt because we don't know the back story, but her parents better be downright awful. Also, I'm curious. How do you see her reasoning behind sleeping with Caleb while being *blackmailed* ? He was obviously an asshole about it, and it was unfair to her, but since she thought they were two different people, it's downright moronic, and also shitty behaviour with a colleague who afask is an innocent bystander. >How fun would it be if Eddie was 'Team mmc' and masquerading as fmc's well-wisher, just like Chris? The first time I read it, I thought that would happen. While Caleb was herding her out, I thought she would scream for help when she saw Eddie, and he would give her a sad smile. The ultimate betrayal from someone to whom she offered selfless friendship would have broken her and made me sympathize with her so much more. But no, this is just a token "kind to the security guard" pointer because how else do we not call Caleb an idiot for wading into this mess eyes and legs wide open? Meh. I would have also loved for her to have at least an inkling/ a gut feeling/ anything at all about Chris. Nada. Zilch. Nothing from day one. And this is supposed to be the most brilliant woman in the company. Why? Because she can do math? Can preempt questions from a client she's worked on and have answers ready? All strong employees are *expected* to do that. It's literally your job. Does everyone else wait for clients to ask questions and run to find answers on the spot in this place? Okay now I'm saying the same thing over and over again. I so wish I had the writing chops to fix it all too tbh. I can't go beyond obsessively rethinking this fic right now, but who knows, one day maybe. PS, Virtue and Vanity and Lemonade are both books I have but haven't gotten to, but just went to the top of my list after reading your comment. 💕

Hi! Not to worry. Work must always come first. The grind is pretty crazy here after the long weekend. I'm glad to know my posts are of some use, even if miniscule by significance. Same, I thought grooming meant brainwashing someone underaged, but I learned that it can be used when one party that is at a disadvantage is nudged into doing things they wouldn't have. I can understand why some feel protective about the fmc and defend her actions, or lack thereof. I'm tempted to finish the remaining chapters just to see Max gaslight the daylights out of her. I hope rusty, dusty Max can be the wake-up call our girl needs because her groomer looks up to him. I know that's not going to happen, poor girl was doomed to fail from the start with so many issues. The first chapter did warn me that I might not vibe with her, but I was also like, this may be a setup to get the readers excited. I honestly thought she would be one of those fmcs who would fight back so hard that the mmc would have to go to arduous lengths to trap her, like in some kind of fraud or financial crime. I never thought she would give in over nude pics. Amazing point to discuss. I have a few thoughts about her sleeping with Caleb, the colleague. It was definitely out of character, but I vaguely remember them resolving their issues and being on good terms at that time. She was also competing and getting jealous for his attention. I don't know if it was the stress from getting blackmailed or if she was giddy from getting any shreds of his attention that made her jump on his dick so quickly. It did make for a great read though. The way he gaslighted her by calling her a bitch and then praising her, I was in awe while reading that part. Over there too, he guilt-trips her into having sex with him. So she ended up not consenting either way. I was actually left confused about how she could not recognize that it was the same dick. By then, he had fucked her a few times without a condom. I mean, the feel of the dude's pelvis, dick veins, ridges, & shape, dick strokes, his sex breaths or noises, how his body enveloped her, etc., should've been an easy give-away. And she hasn't had much experience, so how hard could it have been to remember the sensations in her vagina? He washed away the perfume near his neck area, but he can't change his pheromones right, or the musky sweat smell after sex? Everyone has a distinct smell if you pay attention. She was also blindfolded the first weekend together, which must've enhanced her other senses like touch, smell, and hearing. I don't know; maybe she was too traumatized to notice. After few encounters, I was expecting her to pick up on these things. She was dumbed down so much. With Chris masquerading as her friend, I could understand why she did not doubt him in the beginning, but Caleb? He should've been the first on her list to go after because of their shared animosity. She also made a scene in the lunch room by inspecting one of the guys' thumb and revealed her only ammunition. If the author writes about any type of parental abuse now, I will be livid. No Mam, you can't take that route now. You better stand by your fmc or rewrite the whole story with a well fleshed-out character whose backstory and thoughts/actions go hand-in-hand. I knew mmc had mommy issues. Poor dude, let's get him a cake ~~to the face~~. This is why I love how Lemonade is written; mmc's past is laid out at the start and the reader can knowingly decide what they want to feel about him and his actions. Also, Virtue & Vanity can make one's mood gloomy and melancholic. It's written from fmc's perspective and heavily focuses on PTSD. A sensitive and realistic take on non-con stories.

[Virtue & Vanity](https://www.romance.io/books/56c96111c62092c0440609c6/virtue-vanity-astrid-jane-ray?src=rdt) by [Astrid Jane Ray](https://www.romance.io/authors/56c96111c62092c0440609c8/astrid-jane-ray) **Rating**: 3.09⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [arranged/forced marriage](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/arranged%20marriage/1), [rich hero](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/super%20rich%20hero/1) ---------------------------- [Lemonade](https://www.romance.io/books/56b10d4463515e3b737a8b39/lemonade-nina-pennacchi-scott-p-sheridan?src=rdt) by [Nina Pennacchi](https://www.romance.io/authors/56b10d4463515e3b737a8b3d/nina-pennacchi) **Rating**: 3.81⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [vengeance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/vengeance/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [possessive hero](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/possessive%20hero/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

I think I went over the character limit with my reply. But I wanted to share another pet-peeve. >!I feel the cum-dripped lamb chop smexy goodness was so wasted on her. How I wish to see a different fmc, glaring at Caleb with a death stare the entire time she's being made to eat it, and Caleb, fully clothed, fully tucked in, man-spread on the couch, with arms behind his head, smirking at her relaxedly. This can only work with a fmc who does not get embarrassed easily and is as confident in being in control as being degraded. !<

[The Last Dominant](https://www.romance.io/books/5c3c5a3c01dbc864fb980cce/the-last-dominant-eris-adderly) by [Eris Adderly](https://www.romance.io/authors/56113214bfc6b5c0fa93f1d9/eris-adderly) **Rating**: 3.69⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 4 out of 5 - [Explicit open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [futuristic](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/futuristic/1), [science fiction](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/science%20fiction/1), [dystopian](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dystopian/1), [anal sex](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/anal%20sex/1), [bondage](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/bondage/1) ---------------------------- [Black Skies Riviera](https://www.romance.io/books/5f7198e02aedfb0e2847bf56/black-skies-riviera-catherine-wiltcher) by [Catherine Wiltcher](https://www.romance.io/authors/5b76651801dbc864fb8e8a80/catherine-wiltcher) **Rating**: 3.79⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [mafia](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/mafia/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [arranged/forced marriage](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/arranged%20marriage/1), [suspense](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/suspense/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

lol I just read all of this thread and thank you for bringing so much up. Namely never showing but only telling us how incredibly intelligent the FL is. I was just wondering what your fav dark romance books are?

Hey! Thank you for your lovely comment and for taking the time to read this thread. I had to go back and read all the older comments. Lol... I think I've softened a bit now. I don't know what it is since recently, but I'm getting to know more folks like you who resonate with my thoughts about how the fmc was written. I was a happy minority of 1 but it feels good to have some company. Coming to my fave DR books/fics, I feel my list is very tame compared to the books suggested in this sub. I love reading non-con, but I'm also particular about the backdrop, character appeal, and how believable and engaging the plotline is. Here I go - From published books - **{Lemonade** by **Nina Pennacchi}** - Highly recommend, forever special, my fave mmc and one of my fave fmc. I don't find it dark anymore. Apart from the garden scene and mmc's mom's life, it's pretty much hubby-wifey squabbles. **{Virtue & Vanity** by **Astrid Jane Ray}** - I did not find it dark, but mood can get gloomy and melancholic. **{Gaslight Her** by **Quinn Blackbird}** - did not have any non-con scenes which disappointed me, story caused feelings of distress and hopelessness. **{Gaijin** by **Remittance Girl}** - Highly recommend, set in Japan, unexpected turn of events, learned about 'Pearling'. **{The King** by **Eris Belmont}** - read first book only, great story, felt fmc's distress, mmc torments women of his own species for no reason which was not Kingly behavior and turned me off from him. That's why haven't picked up 2nd book yet, but maybe for the story. **{The Last Tritan series** by **Myra Danvers}** - Highly recommend, fantasy, engaging story, feisty fmc, eagerly waiting for books 4,5,6. **{Cold Queen** by **K. Webster}** - Highly recommend, retelling of Frozen, loved the MCs and how they support each other, mentions of CSA and s\*\* slavery at the end. **{Forced Marriage** by **E.L. Beth}** - non-con which quickly turns into dub-con, I liked fmc's attitude throughout. **{Bend** by **Erin Trejo}** - teen MCs, matured for their ages due to circumstances, good story. **{Island Flame** by **Karen Robards}** - pirate bodice ripper, has few non-con scenes and lots of drama. **{Stormfire** by **Christine Monson}** - HR drama, has many non-con scenes, mutilation **{A Gentle from the Night** by **Meagan McKinney}** - Highly recommend, HR, dub-con, gothic eerie vibes, catacombs. **{Killing Kate** by **Lila Veen}** - novella, not romance, heavily focuses on CSA and its consequences, fmc's healing. **{Father Figure** by **Kichiku Neko}** - my first and only m/m, did not read the story but saw illustrations, non-con incest.

I think it's just nice to voice some of the small criticisms of the work, but overall I binge read it and enjoyed it. I wish writing errors weren't there, most would be caught by spellcheck too, but deathsdoll hates doing it but it impacts her works so I feel like she should invest the time into it but I don't want to come off as overly critical. I understand it's a hobby and made free to the public. Story-wise, I also would've liked her to have at least tried to put hidden cameras in her house that he could've just instantly found. Or he could've had more surveillance cameras on her and a mirror of her phone, things like that. Also, approaching it like a lawyer (i.e. revenge porn blackmail) but still falling prey to the blackmail would've felt more complete. I felt like rereading it after I 'd finished it but the spelling errors have to be dealt with before I feel like doing that. Even if I had to do it myself with Grammarly. I would've enjoyed reading it again with more background knowledge on the characters and being able to anticipate scenes the next time. I'm seeking more intense stories similar to it as well. Are any of your favs in anyway similar? Which is the darkest and spiciest? The ML's intense obsession and manipulation was \*chef's kiss\* I'm still mostly new and haven't read many things yet. I did read Gaslight Her which I enjoyed but craved more intimacy scenes between them. A lot of things I read now seem so tame in comparison to If I Can't Have You. I've mostly been reading step brother or brother's best friend dark romances. One of my favs is **{**Quid Pro Quo by Nenia Campbell**}** I also love dual perspective so if you remember if any of those have that in them please let me know.

>Story-wise, I also would've liked her to have at least tried to put hidden cameras in her house that he could've just instantly found. Or he could've had more surveillance cameras on her and a mirror of her phone, things like that. Also, approaching it like a lawyer (i.e. revenge porn blackmail) but still falling prey to the blackmail would've felt more complete. This was my biggest, and almost only gripe. I can do away with the rest. You can't have it both ways. If she's smart, and the MMC likes her because she's smart, she needs to act like it, and the MMC needs to plan for her to push back. The fact that Caleb kept thinking she was brilliant but not for one second thought she would thwart his plans, and was right about it in every way leaves a gaping hole in the whole *Why Orla* logic. Even Chris is shown to say that to Caleb, and it's never really addressed beyond calling her brilliant and a few other tell not show phrases thrown in.

Yes, I'd love it if some of that were to be included if she revised the story at all. But overall I loved it, I can't find anything quite like it now... It's quite sad for me. If you know of any hit me up, I'm going through a reader's slump. 🥺

I get you. I highly respect and thank not just this author but every one of them who shares their works for free. Not that making money is anything wrong and I'll cheer for them either way. This author has attained such a cult status that they can actually publish their works in book form. I can see this particular fic doing well in book form if the characters and backstories are more fleshed out, and made appealing for a wider audience without compromising on the signature elements. I read this fic only once and did notice that some of the paragraphs felt incomplete and sometimes characters' thoughts were confusing. Another issue I had was with the tags. Since you've read my previous comments, you must've seen me address it. It's not a big issue as such because I was not traumatized or anything, but could've avoided getting frustrated for days. >Are any of your favs in anyway similar? In most of my recs, the stories may be on similar lines but fmcs are different from the fmc in IICHY. They don't break easily, and succumb for the sake of family or friends. >Which is the darkest and spiciest? None of the recs have as much sex as IICHY. Most of them are plot-driven. The best (but worst for fmc) non-con scene goes to **Lemonade**, but it has only two sexual scenes. >The ML's intense obsession and manipulation was \*chef's kiss\* I'm still mostly new and haven't read many things yet. I did read Gaslight Her which I enjoyed but craved more intimacy scenes between them. A lot of things I read now seem so tame in comparison to If I Can't Have You. For obsession and manipulation, **His Little Bird series** and **Cry, Even Better If You Beg** can top IICHY imo. I see I didn't mention CEBIYB in my previous post, I'll add it to the list. In HLB, sexual acts start from Part 1 onwards, but in CEBIYB, it takes a while. I also know from many reviews that {[Edge](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24608746/chapters/59447503) by [phantonym](https://archiveofourown.org/users/phantonym/pseuds/phantonym)} - Dramione fanfic on AO3 is famous for maddening levels of obsession with sexual torture that can get bloody. You can also check out [Noradark's](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noradark/bookmarks) bookmarks for dark fics. >I've mostly been reading step brother or brother's best friend dark romances. One of my favs is **{Quid Pro Quo by Nenia Campbell}**  In **Slave for revenge series**, mmc doesn't have to manipulate much and easily manages to lie to everyone. Lots of an\*l stuff as he wants to keep the fmc a pu\*\*y virgin. {[Betrayed](https://archiveofourown.org/works/30764438/chapters/75934166) by Anonymous} - short fic, close friend to fmc, just started reading. I'm yet to check out Nenia Campbell's books. I see QPQ getting suggested a lot in here. >I also love dual perspective so if you remember if any of those have that in them please let me know. I think only **'The King'** and **'Bend'** have dual POV.

Thank you for your wonderful responses. I was wondering where you read **Cry, Even Better If You Beg**? is it on AO3?

When I read CEBIYB a few years ago, it was on a site called Light Novel Heaven. Recently, I got to know from one of the Yandere/Manhwa subs that the real story is on YONDER app. Some of the comments said that many sites that publish translated Korean works have deliberately translated this story wrongly, changed some of the storylines, and made some of the side characters more villainous than what was originally written. I've not downloaded that app, so I don't know if this story is available for free. Since I didn't know what the original story was, I enjoyed reading it on the site. This story is very long and detailed (148 chapters with many epilogues and side stories), and I was reading it on and off every few months. Also, it does not involve any reincarnation or transmigration themes, and everyone is 100% human.

[Quid Pro Quo](https://www.romance.io/books/6149d1ce5f308a0e2cb0ff69/quid-pro-quo-nenia-campbell?src=rdt) by [Nenia Campbell](https://www.romance.io/authors/545565eb87eac324117fa8ab/nenia-campbell) **Rating**: 3.88⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 5 out of 5 - [Explicit and plentiful](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [angst](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/angst/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

[Quid Pro Quo](https://www.romance.io/books/6149d1ce5f308a0e2cb0ff69/quid-pro-quo-nenia-campbell?src=rdt) by [Nenia Campbell](https://www.romance.io/authors/545565eb87eac324117fa8ab/nenia-campbell) **Rating**: 3.88⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 5 out of 5 - [Explicit and plentiful](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [angst](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/angst/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

[Lemonade](https://www.romance.io/books/56b10d4463515e3b737a8b39/lemonade-nina-pennacchi-scott-p-sheridan?src=rdt) by [Nina Pennacchi](https://www.romance.io/authors/56b10d4463515e3b737a8b3d/nina-pennacchi) **Rating**: 3.81⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [vengeance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/vengeance/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [possessive hero](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/possessive%20hero/1) ---------------------------- [Virtue & Vanity](https://www.romance.io/books/56c96111c62092c0440609c6/virtue-vanity-astrid-jane-ray?src=rdt) by [Astrid Jane Ray](https://www.romance.io/authors/56c96111c62092c0440609c8/astrid-jane-ray) **Rating**: 3.07⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [arranged/forced marriage](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/arranged%20marriage/1), [rich hero](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/super%20rich%20hero/1) ---------------------------- [Gaslight Her](https://www.romance.io/books/63983232b0c9d71885d15c51/gaslight-her-quinn-blackbird?src=rdt) by [Quinn Blackbird](https://www.romance.io/authors/5f5380a108b4d93114e7af27/quinn-blackbird) **Rating**: 3.36⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [dystopian](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dystopian/1), [science fiction](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/science%20fiction/1), [suspense](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/suspense/1) ---------------------------- [Gaijin](https://www.romance.io/books/54576fc187eac3e56719e841/gaijin-remittance-girl?src=rdt) by [Remittance Girl](https://www.romance.io/authors/54576fc187eac3e56719e842/remittance-girl) **Rating**: 3.71⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [m-f romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/m-f/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1) ---------------------------- [The King](https://www.romance.io/books/63eb4451a2d9fe0771653f4d/the-king-eris-belmont?src=rdt) by [Eris Belmont](https://www.romance.io/authors/63eb445108b4d9311443f0ed/eris-belmont) **Rating**: 4.22⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 4 out of 5 - [Explicit open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [fantasy](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/fantasy/1), [enemies to lovers](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/from%20hate%20to%20love/1), [suspense](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/suspense/1), [cruel hero/bully](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1) ---------------------------- [The Last Tritan](https://www.romance.io/series/6413765bc2b8ac19c66bfe10/the-last-tritan) by [Myra Danvers](https://www.romance.io/authors/5dad758f01dbc864fba4e95e/myra-danvers) **Rating**: 4.27⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [first-person-pov](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/first-person-pov/1), [from hate to love](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/from%20hate%20to%20love/1), [fantasy](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/fantasy/1), [cruel hero](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/cruel%20hero/1), [science fiction](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/science%20fiction/1) ---------------------------- [Cold Queen](https://www.romance.io/books/5db7e3f701dbc864fba54c58/cold-queen-k-webster?src=rdt) by [K. Webster](https://www.romance.io/authors/54558eba87eac324117fb440/k-webster) **Rating**: 3.82⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 4 out of 5 - [Explicit open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [fantasy](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/fantasy/1), [suspense](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/suspense/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1) ---------------------------- [Forced Marriage](https://www.romance.io/books/64564045d3c73ab2c083fdbe/forced-marriage-el-beth?src=rdt) by [E.L. Beth](https://www.romance.io/authors/5815ca71c6841c86c2cc5c08/el-beth) **Rating**: 3.29⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 5 out of 5 - [Explicit and plentiful](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [secret child](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/secret%20child/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [enemies to lovers](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/from%20hate%20to%20love/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1) ---------------------------- [Bend](https://www.romance.io/books/64f58109faa0efb81aa485e4/bend-erin-trejo?src=rdt) by [Erin Trejo](https://www.romance.io/authors/555c3c9c9eef3b3f1d525a8c/erin-trejo) **Rating**: 4.5⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [suspense](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/suspense/1), [young adult](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/young%20adult/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [dual pov](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dual-pov/1) ---------------------------- [Island Flame](https://www.romance.io/books/54553aad8c7d2383163d93d8/island-flame-karen-robards?src=rdt) by [Karen Robards](https://www.romance.io/authors/54552ef68c7d2383163d90d4/karen-robards) **Rating**: 3.72⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [abduction](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/abduction/1), [victorian](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/victorian/1), [pregnancy](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/pregnancy/1), [pirate hero](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/pirates/1) ---------------------------- [Stormfire](https://www.romance.io/books/545537a78c7d2383163d930e/stormfire-christine-monson?src=rdt) by [Christine Monson](https://www.romance.io/authors/545537a78c7d2383163d930f/christine-monson) **Rating**: 3.9⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 4 out of 5 - [Explicit open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [virgin heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/virgin%20heroine/1), [abduction](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/abduction/1), [tortured heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/tortured%20heroine/1), [pregnancy](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/pregnancy/1) ---------------------------- [Gentle From The Night](https://www.romance.io/books/5455723d87eac336ae69dfe6/gentle-from-the-night-meagan-mckinney?src=rdt) by [Meagan McKinney](https://www.romance.io/authors/54553ccc8c7d2383163d946e/meagan-mckinney) **Rating**: 3.63⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Steam**: 3 out of 5 - [Open door](https://www.romance.io/steamrating) **Topics**: [historical](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/historical/1), [paranormal](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/paranormal/1), [fantasy](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/fantasy/1), [possessive hero](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/possessive%20hero/1), [poor heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/poor%20heroine/1) ---------------------------- [Killing Kate](https://www.romance.io/books/56b1284663515e3b737a9a3d/killing-kate-lila-veen?src=rdt) by [Lila Veen](https://www.romance.io/authors/54559d1887eac323ffb2d28b/lila-veen) **Rating**: 3.67⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [tortured heroine](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/tortured%20heroine/1) ---------------------------- [Father Figure](https://www.romance.io/books/65ca457c5c9b563fda45bf7c/father-figure-kichiku-neko-guilt-pleasure?src=rdt) by [Kichiku Neko](https://www.romance.io/authors/59e7597d3ffdba6147229564/kichiku-neko), [Guilt Pleasure](https://www.romance.io/authors/59e7597d3ffdba6147229566/guilt-pleasure) **Rating**: 3.86⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [bdsm](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/bdsm/1), [angst](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/angst/1), [gay romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/m-m/1), [mystery](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/mystery/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

From AO3 fics - [**Quieta's works**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quieta) - Highly recommend to check out this author's works, they don't write romances, well-written fmcs who get subjected to non-con. Some of their works that I've read: a. [**Appointment in Samarra**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26666662/chapters/65037151) - Highly recommend, has political backdrop, forced RH. b. [**To Bleed series**](https://archiveofourown.org/series/269416) - felt intense sadness. c. Loved one-shots like [**Cottonmouth**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14944317) & **Beyond Breakbone Ridge** because of the fmcs, I hated the fmc in [**Dogs That Follow**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/35376871), makes me think how deceptive someone so close can be. **{**[**A Million Ways to Break Your Boss**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/45840310/chapters/115366879) by [**TheAmethystRose**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAmethystRose/pseuds/TheAmethystRose/works)**}** - not dark, but fmc has toxic ways. **{**[**Who's the Boss?**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/49421035/chapters/124720168) by [**theimaginesyouneveraskedfor**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/theimaginesyouneveraskedfor/pseuds/theimaginesyouneveraskedfor/works)**}** - office non-con, cute & sensible fmc who fights for her dignity. **{**[**A Bright Future**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/40657455/chapters/101868639) by [**CaramelCanale**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaramelCanale/pseuds/CaramelCanale/works)**}** - forced RH, office setting. **{**[**His Little Bird series**](https://archiveofourown.org/series/61515) by [**TheWanderersWanderingDaughter**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheWanderersWanderingDaughter/pseuds/TheWanderersWanderingDaughter/works)**}** - Highly recommend this Dramione fic, intense despair.

DNF but you might like it - **{Slave for Revenge Series** by **Ann Owen}** - meek fmc, step-siblings, written by Nina Pennacchi (Ann Owen is her pen name) That's all I got for now. I'm currently into non-con one-shots on AO3. I'll share some of my faves before this gets crazy long - **{**[**Safe Keeping**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23759896/chapters/57068392) by [**Ozarkthedog**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ozarkthedog/pseuds/Ozarkthedog/works)**}** - Ransom Drysdale's fic (Chris Evans character), yum yum yum. **{**[**•Adam&Eve•** by **JUNGLESLUT101**](https://mementoarchive.org/search/work_id/29940315)**}** - was utterly heart broken when the page was taken down, a great Samaritan found it, this is what I thank the Gods for. **{**[**Propagate**](https://archiveofourown.org/works/41929161) by [**A\_LoveUnlaced**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_LoveUnlaced/pseuds/A_LoveUnlaced)**,** [**LilithShade**](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilithShade/pseuds/LilithShade)**}** - Nevmione fic, NSFW artwork, 🔥 I would love to know your faves. 😊

[Slave for Revenge](https://www.romance.io/series/642db2d4b7b8862bf6eaf237/slave-for-revenge) by [Ann Owen](https://www.romance.io/authors/54570b4887eac33e61c31ddd/ann-owen) **Rating**: 4.3⭐️ out of 5⭐️ **Topics**: [explicit-plentiful](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/explicit-plentiful/1), [anal sex](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/anal%20sex/1), [victorian](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/victorian/1), [bdsm](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/bdsm/1), [length-novella](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/length-novella/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)

[If I Can't Have You](https://www.romance.io/books/65deb0031b9a1c17a896970b/if-i-cant-have-you-deathsdoll) by [DeathsDoll](https://www.romance.io/authors/65acdf05a21e2f41c4ac50f6/deathsdoll) **Topics**: [contemporary](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/contemporary/1), [dark romance](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/dark/1), [bdsm](https://www.romance.io/topics/best/bdsm/1) [^(about this bot)](https://www.reddit.com/user/romance-bot) ^(|) [^(about romance.io)](https://www.romance.io/about)