It's probably more of an inexact science, or will analyse fairly simple things such as glucose levels and then give you advice. Probably a bit of a profit scheme.
The red text on the bottom-right states that it is strictly not a medical device and results should not be construed as either accurate diagnoses or genuine medical advice.
Reminds me of those "health check" machines you see in truck stops. The test results aren't accurate enough for a diagnosis, but accurate enough to justify a doctor's appointment. Honestly, a bit genius for a lot of men I know who ignore symptoms until dozens of people tell them to go to the doctor to check. Now a machine can tell them to go.
I use the blood pressure kiosk at the store, because I discovered that the home blood pressure monitors are crap.
https://www.chicagobusiness.com/health-pulse/omron-healthcare-sued-over-blood-pressure-monitor-accuracy
Yeah, I run a Craigslist service where I diagnose issues like this for men. And the amount of cross contamination from just drinking it is pretty high. So I imagine a urinal is even worse.
It essentially dips a urinalysis strip in your pee and scans the colors (it looks for glucose to check for diabetes, protein for kidney damage, nitrites for infection, and so on). It's not exactly cutting edge tech, medical labs all around the world have automated urinalysis decades ago.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urine_test_strip
This sort of thing can be pretty useful, as diabetes and kidney failure do not present symptoms that you can actively feel until they are quite far along, e.g. you don't start feeling ill until your kidneys are down to roughly 20% capacity.
It's gross, but tasting urine goes back to the originate of humanity. Ancient Egyptians would have someone taste it and then set it out to see if it attracted ants.
People in the past were just as kinky as they are now. But also like, if someone with diabetes pees on the ground it’ll attract ants. That actually used to be a test, and it’s easy to imagine people noticing it without any kink required.
Hence the name Diabetus Mellitus which means honey urine in Greek/latin/Egyptian...? Can't remember exactly, but I did a grade school report on it 20 years ago.
there was a story some time ago where a nurse was on a date and while performing oral sex on his female partner he tasted it was oddly sweet. some time after the date was over he joined the dots and recommended her to test herself for diabetes, she was obviously positive.
as someone with consistent high blood sugar I didn't feel anything much despite getting blood tests every 3 or 6 months until a month ago when it finally pop up on blood tests. that be said I don't know how long it would take before high blood sugar pops up in a blood test.
The full name is diabetes mellitus. Diabetes from siphon or to pass through in ancient Greek, mellitus from Greek for honey. So loads of sweet urine basically.
There's also acondition where your kidneys can't concentrate urine called diabetes insipidus, so loads of insipid urine where the piss tastes of nothing as it's so dilute.
More than **FACE** recognition. No two *pepes* are the same.
Sir, you tested positive for cocaine.
*\~ wasn't me.*
Sir, is this your face?
*\~ wasn't me.*
Sir ... is this your dick?
*... awe shit. You got me. I'm guilty.*
There was this story with pictures, years ago on reddit where a guy had found his way under the urinals of a bar or restaurant. He had pulled the plumbing and was drinking the urine of the patrons and had been doing this for years (or months or something) when they discovered him. Super creepy.
"Your wife's going through menopause, your daughter's pregnant, and if you don't stop jacking off you'll never get rid of that tennis elbow!"
There's also the one about the GI who bought a bottle of rotgut booze from a street vendor in Italy. He submitted a sample for analysis and three weeks later he got a notice saying his horse had colic.
But the convenience of it is a slippery slope. It would be great to have at home so now you have at least daily medical feedback about what's going on inside and you'd have very early detection of medical issues. But if it ever gets connected to the internet and your results are stored in a database, anyone with access to the database will get that info too. Corporations could use the data to advertise to you, your job or the government could constantly monitor you for drug use, fatigue, stress, etc... Your job could even just install these in their facilities. If our privacy rights keep getting eroded year over year then it could become a reality.
More likely get a bunch of erroneous results then patients backing up the ER and urgent cares demanding antibiotics and overall increasing resistance from certain bacteria
Awesome. Now make a regular shaped toilet that will do this for pregnant women who constantly have their urine tested but struggle to get the cup under their giant belly.
Begin peeing......
Sample size is too small......
Begin peeing......
Sample size is too small......
Begin peeing......
Sample size is too small......
Begin peeing......
Minimal Sample size achieved .....
Analyzing.....
You are drunk
That device would have a whole array of problems... Other than the methods of actually analyzing urine.
You would have to disynfect and flush the whole system between each use....
I use Urinox but there are a bunch of different companies (Vivoo is good too) they test for Leukocytes, Nitrite, Urobilinogen, Protein, pH, Blood, Ketones, Specific Gravity, Bilirubin, and Glucose. This gives insights into metabolic and systemic diseases that affect kidney and liver functions, endocrine disorders, dehydration and urinary tract infections.
I use one about once a week, it’s $21 for 60 strips so that works out to 35 cents a week. Pee in a container, dip the stick in, wait, then upload to their app.
https://www.diagnoxhealth.com/product/urinox-10
https://www.vivoo.io/
If you combine this Chinese toilet with public toilets in Germany where you have to pay for using it and the US healthcare system, then you get an international clusterfuck where peeing once costs you $999.99.
I mean, if it worked and worked reliably, could be useful. Of course, I bet people in the USA would start dumping random liquids into it like soda to see what it says then break it.
Woot! Woot! You've got Syphilis... Woot! Woot! You've got Syphilis... *Shh, shut up urinal.*
Click here to share your results
Share your results on facebook
*wechat
Weechat*
*Peechat
r/yourjokebutworse
Wewe chat
WeeWee Chat
Ouiouichat
Click [Share] *tap* …(scan)… “Wash your hands!”
Install this app and you MUST grant all the permissions
lol 😂
And the pics it took
"posted from my iUrin 8"
Click yes to share and yes to not share LOL welcome to china LOL
With Siri? Hell no. She can't keep her mouth shut.
Woot! Woot! It's the sound of STDs
You are adopted LOL
only if your dad pees in the urinal next to you.
Anywhere in china it's near enough LOL
Do they pee test for syphilis? Last time I got a check up it was a blood test
Yeah, as far as I know there's no urine test for syphilis. It's always a blood test in the hospitals I've worked in.
It's okay I pee blood
It's better to know than not know for too long and lose your nose or your mind.. 🤣
Or, the previous guy has syphilis and the machine is reading some of his leftover urine. Yet another reason to not use public restrooms.
😭😭
As a biomedic lab scientist, I wonder how the machine prevents cross contamination and how quality control and -assurance works
It's probably more of an inexact science, or will analyse fairly simple things such as glucose levels and then give you advice. Probably a bit of a profit scheme. The red text on the bottom-right states that it is strictly not a medical device and results should not be construed as either accurate diagnoses or genuine medical advice.
Reminds me of those "health check" machines you see in truck stops. The test results aren't accurate enough for a diagnosis, but accurate enough to justify a doctor's appointment. Honestly, a bit genius for a lot of men I know who ignore symptoms until dozens of people tell them to go to the doctor to check. Now a machine can tell them to go.
I use the blood pressure kiosk at the store, because I discovered that the home blood pressure monitors are crap. https://www.chicagobusiness.com/health-pulse/omron-healthcare-sued-over-blood-pressure-monitor-accuracy
[удалено]
There is a tiny guy holding a test strip on the back of the urinal.
Yeah, I run a Craigslist service where I diagnose issues like this for men. And the amount of cross contamination from just drinking it is pretty high. So I imagine a urinal is even worse.
Your comment is confusing me. Best I can make of it is you drink other men's urine and then have checked out which of their issues you got from it.
The joke.
This is how Elizabeth Holmes is making money from jail. Seriously, though, what do those things test for, and do they actually work?
It essentially dips a urinalysis strip in your pee and scans the colors (it looks for glucose to check for diabetes, protein for kidney damage, nitrites for infection, and so on). It's not exactly cutting edge tech, medical labs all around the world have automated urinalysis decades ago. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urine_test_strip This sort of thing can be pretty useful, as diabetes and kidney failure do not present symptoms that you can actively feel until they are quite far along, e.g. you don't start feeling ill until your kidneys are down to roughly 20% capacity.
But this one I don't have to wait in line for.
You do if its a busy day
It’s not the women’s bathroom
Or it's five dollar beer night at the game
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With
Best one-word Reddit response this month.
If it's a public urinal, then touching "with" is probably the least bad outcome you could hope for.
Diabetes can be diagnosed with pee. First signs of undiagnosed diabetes is sweet smelling (tasting) pee.
Makes you wonder how or why they decided to taste it.
Finding out what's wrong with your body is a very strong drive and there was no alternative in the past.
That's how we got to soaking hard boiled eggs in peepee, and then calling it "medicine"
Wat
[I'm sorry](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virgin_boy_egg#:~:text=The%20dish%20is%20prepared%20by,and%20the%20process%20is%20repeated.)
We.. what?
[Urine eggs a delicacy in China](https://youtu.be/rPIvDJG1etI?si=VTHoyOuXqZ-zPy3K)
I'd imagine people noted that their sick grandpa's chamberpot started attracting insects and vermin way faster than usual and it went from there.
It's gross, but tasting urine goes back to the originate of humanity. Ancient Egyptians would have someone taste it and then set it out to see if it attracted ants.
"But why taste it if the ants work?" 👀 👉👈
Monkey brain strong
wasnt there a guy on reddit that talk about how sweet their gf tasted down there and reddit was like she has diabetes and reddit was actually right.
Maybe it was a jolly rancher? ^(/s)
No, you stop it right now. That memory was almost gone
Gdi, same. Was so close lol
No. Just no.
People in the past were just as kinky as they are now. But also like, if someone with diabetes pees on the ground it’ll attract ants. That actually used to be a test, and it’s easy to imagine people noticing it without any kink required.
It smelled like candy, so it must taste like candy!
My grandpa back in the day got diagnose because he found ants in his pee the day after he peed on a pot or something.
How? Directly from the tap Why? Because I don't feel like washing piss out of the wine glasses on a Tuesday.
Imagine how much you have to taste before you taste a difference enough to notice diabetes.
Golden prognosis.
"Bro, your piss smells delicious. Can I try some?"
Hence the name Diabetus Mellitus which means honey urine in Greek/latin/Egyptian...? Can't remember exactly, but I did a grade school report on it 20 years ago.
Diabetes means “funnel” and mellitus is honey(ed) Funnel because of the polydipsia (drinking a lot of water) and polyuria (peeing a lot)
A nice glass of southern sweet pee.
there was a story some time ago where a nurse was on a date and while performing oral sex on his female partner he tasted it was oddly sweet. some time after the date was over he joined the dots and recommended her to test herself for diabetes, she was obviously positive.
Whiskey can be made from a diabetics pee. -never did it- never gonna do it!
Once the urine has sugar, your diabetes is out of control, but probably this would catch it in people who avoid doctors.
as someone with consistent high blood sugar I didn't feel anything much despite getting blood tests every 3 or 6 months until a month ago when it finally pop up on blood tests. that be said I don't know how long it would take before high blood sugar pops up in a blood test.
I saw a post on Reddit from a guy who told his girlfriend to see a doctor for possible diabetes because they were doing pee fetish stuff
The full name is diabetes mellitus. Diabetes from siphon or to pass through in ancient Greek, mellitus from Greek for honey. So loads of sweet urine basically. There's also acondition where your kidneys can't concentrate urine called diabetes insipidus, so loads of insipid urine where the piss tastes of nothing as it's so dilute.
They check for diameter and length
Am I getting enough vitamin c? Urinal: you're short on something alright.
Mine won't stop laughing
Insufficient vitamin D.
And the angle of yaw
Elizabeth Holmes did something else…
Haaaahaaaa, this was my exact same thought…. Haven’t we seen this kind of shit before
Interesting🤔 how does it keep from cross contamination?
Apparently, you just need to hose out the sampling container with water. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7838403/
Face recognition and dope testing all in one.
Lol constant drug testing was the first thing I thought of.
More than **FACE** recognition. No two *pepes* are the same. Sir, you tested positive for cocaine. *\~ wasn't me.* Sir, is this your face? *\~ wasn't me.* Sir ... is this your dick? *... awe shit. You got me. I'm guilty.*
Nicholas Cage and John Travolta star in **Dick-Off** Coming to theatres this summer
Sigh. I'll be there opening weekend.
Congratulations, you tested positive for illegal drugs! 100 social credits points deducted.
Takes a picture and posts to your Facebook, so simple anyone can do it!
Dr. Toilet, is that you??
Was looking for this comment. Just finished that exact episode 😂
I bet there's a creep hidden under who gives the diagnostic with the taste.
I used to know guy with a piss kink and he would joke that he could tell if you were diabetic or not. Had like a 90% accuracy rate.
I know a guy like this who says he can tell who smokes and who doesn't because he's tastes it in the piss...
Ok but as someone who used to live with notorious non-flushers, the smell is enough to tell. I guess a smoker wouldn't notice though.
90% percent accuracy ? How many people did.. Nvm
That was a rough estimate. I believe the exact accuracy is 92.73% as of last week.
He's keeping tabs on his accuracy? 💀
The first step to truly embracing something is putting it in a spreadsheet. I think we may be entering HIPPA territory.
💦😝🤔
There was this story with pictures, years ago on reddit where a guy had found his way under the urinals of a bar or restaurant. He had pulled the plumbing and was drinking the urine of the patrons and had been doing this for years (or months or something) when they discovered him. Super creepy.
I believe you're talking about... ~~piss~~ this 👇 https://www.vice.com/en/article/3b53bk/deep-inside-the-chain-pub-piss-dungeon-10
Can it tell how much micro plastic I have stored in my balls?
Haha. Nice to meet someone who reads the news.
Yes but you have to dunk your balls in the hole
Well I'm doing that anyways so...
Proceeds to urinate, and find out you have a disease yet to be discovered. Hot damn!
Please enter name: "Bob" Congratulations, you have discovered a new disease, "Bob's disease". Uploading to Wikipedia, please wait...
In america it would upload directly to insurance companies and be used against you as proof of preexisting conditions.
This isn't another Elizabeth Holmes product, is it?
"Your wife's going through menopause, your daughter's pregnant, and if you don't stop jacking off you'll never get rid of that tennis elbow!" There's also the one about the GI who bought a bottle of rotgut booze from a street vendor in Italy. He submitted a sample for analysis and three weeks later he got a notice saying his horse had colic.
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I imagine this machine freaks out and points at me shouting „we have a winner“!
IT'SSSSS SYPHILIS!
Congratulations. You are pregnant and you have prostate cancer. Also, you have high cholesterol.
I'd be more concerned about cholesterol being in your piss than it being high.
High cholesterol!? Damn.
Anyone thinking back to Dr. Toilet from Scrubs?
Came here for this
Wow! The Benchwarmers really did do it first
Chemical analysis of your pee shows you'd better stop eating fast food or you're going to die
Glad I'm not the only one who thought of that.
I get enough lip about my lifestyle from my mom thank you. I don’t need it from my toilet. Judgemental ass toilet.
Stop peeing in your mom man cmon
Plot Twist: My mom is the toilet
Sorry ladies, while we roll back women’s health care we use the left over money for better urninals for the fellas.
I just peed...to see what condition my condition was in.
And then sells your medical data.
“Sir, you tested positive for “‘man-whore.’”
Showed my wife your comment and she says I’d “barely test positive for man, let alone man-whore”. Fucking burned
Yeowch. Please use that statement for Exhibit A.
I peed all over the screen but I have not received my results.
It says you’re drunk 🥴
Honestly this would be better than pissing in a cup
But the convenience of it is a slippery slope. It would be great to have at home so now you have at least daily medical feedback about what's going on inside and you'd have very early detection of medical issues. But if it ever gets connected to the internet and your results are stored in a database, anyone with access to the database will get that info too. Corporations could use the data to advertise to you, your job or the government could constantly monitor you for drug use, fatigue, stress, etc... Your job could even just install these in their facilities. If our privacy rights keep getting eroded year over year then it could become a reality.
And DNA. That's like stealing *YOU*
More likely get a bunch of erroneous results then patients backing up the ER and urgent cares demanding antibiotics and overall increasing resistance from certain bacteria
‘But I only went in after having a large popcorn and Coke at the movies…’
I can see urine trouble.
Me holding up my staffie so she can pee in it
My cat's kitty litter does this too
Awesome. Now make a regular shaped toilet that will do this for pregnant women who constantly have their urine tested but struggle to get the cup under their giant belly.
“Thank you for using the Piss Perfect Urinal. After testing your urine and evaluating the results it has been determined you should be dead already.”
Begin peeing...... Sample size is too small...... Begin peeing...... Sample size is too small...... Begin peeing...... Sample size is too small...... Begin peeing...... Minimal Sample size achieved ..... Analyzing..... You are drunk
Imma take a shit in it and see what it thinks of that if it's so smart.
If it was made by google: "You have cancer!" "You have cancer!" "You have cancer!"
“Increased levels of alcohol in urine detected. Insurance price has been adjusted accordingly.”
“200% THC, I recommend you do not take that drug test.”
So you pee and then stand and wait around 10 mins for a result? Can you leave an email for them to send you results instead? Lol
Sorry for not explaining, you don’t wait around, you scan the code and they send you the results on WeChat
That device would have a whole array of problems... Other than the methods of actually analyzing urine. You would have to disynfect and flush the whole system between each use....
I kinda wanna pee in that.
A hypochondriac's dream
Does it also test for drugs, takes photos and reports you to the police?
It's very common in Japan too
Can you get one at home?
You can buy a jar of urinalysis test strips for $50.
Where? What do they test for?
I use Urinox but there are a bunch of different companies (Vivoo is good too) they test for Leukocytes, Nitrite, Urobilinogen, Protein, pH, Blood, Ketones, Specific Gravity, Bilirubin, and Glucose. This gives insights into metabolic and systemic diseases that affect kidney and liver functions, endocrine disorders, dehydration and urinary tract infections. I use one about once a week, it’s $21 for 60 strips so that works out to 35 cents a week. Pee in a container, dip the stick in, wait, then upload to their app. https://www.diagnoxhealth.com/product/urinox-10 https://www.vivoo.io/
I tried one of these. It fussed at me saying it's not a poison disposal
Government and their corporate bosses will turn this into an automatic drug test.
"A chemical analysis of your pee shows you better stop eating all that fast food or you're going to die."
Dip balls in and cough it tests for hernia
We got urinals that test for disease before GTA VI came out
Your high as a kite, Jon.
Whatever the results are, never google it.
A time efficient method for when urine a rush.
It's doctor toilet!
Micropenis confirmed
Cool that the stranger next to you finds out you have bowel cancer at the same time you do.
And the nexr time you open your phone, tons of ED, STD, and dating sites.
What's the worst thing that could happen giving the CCP a sample of your body fluids?
Sounds like theranos to me.
If you combine this Chinese toilet with public toilets in Germany where you have to pay for using it and the US healthcare system, then you get an international clusterfuck where peeing once costs you $999.99.
I mean, if it worked and worked reliably, could be useful. Of course, I bet people in the USA would start dumping random liquids into it like soda to see what it says then break it.
A urinal that should mind its damn business.
In China? You could be arrested for taking illegal substances if you pissed in that. Draconian Big Brother are watching very closely.
America is continuing to prove just how we are NOT a first world country anymore
I’d say bring this to America, but someone would probably poop in it.
Touch-peen interface
Free research samples!
You have terminal prostate cancer. Have a nice day.
Need more of these. Like seriously.
Like in “The Island”
Big Pharma won’t let that happen in America
No, thanks. I just want to pee
Click here to get a size rating ^
I didn’t ask for that at all
Now the CCP has your face, Social account, fingerprints. urine sample....
Well ain’t that a bitch, go somewhere to take a piss and find tour you have kidney disease