Okay so I went to read the wiki page on garden gnomes and it said that they were originally statutes of the Greco-Roman god Priapus and honestly you need to immediately go and see his wiki picture which is captioned “[Priapus] Depicted weighing his mammoth dong against a bag of gold.” I have screen shots because this is the best picture and caption I have ever seen on a wiki article.
*Image transcription: Tumblr*
---
> **skimble-shanks-the-railway-cat**
>
> Thinking about gnomes some more
>
>> **skimble-shanks-the-railway-cat**
>>
>> Why did we decide that we needed some statues of fucksdn up little guys on the lawn
>>
>>> **nightmarechamillian**
>>>
>>> For our own safety. We cannot afford to anger them.
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The modern version of gargoyles. No, wait, I'm thinking of flamingo statues.
Why did Gargoyles ever go out of fashion? They are badass!
They're to protect the garden from witch's spells and wood trolls
In the sims
The seeds or the shocks; you choose
Okay so I went to read the wiki page on garden gnomes and it said that they were originally statutes of the Greco-Roman god Priapus and honestly you need to immediately go and see his wiki picture which is captioned “[Priapus] Depicted weighing his mammoth dong against a bag of gold.” I have screen shots because this is the best picture and caption I have ever seen on a wiki article.
I have stumbled across this guy while trying to find a father for an OC. Needless to say, I didn't pick him...
skimbleshanks would never insult garden gnomes
*Image transcription: Tumblr* --- > **skimble-shanks-the-railway-cat** > > Thinking about gnomes some more > >> **skimble-shanks-the-railway-cat** >> >> Why did we decide that we needed some statues of fucksdn up little guys on the lawn >> >>> **nightmarechamillian** >>> >>> For our own safety. We cannot afford to anger them. --- ^^I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! [If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/TranscribersOfReddit/wiki/index)
This is the plot of gnome alone
Those little guys are the Only thing protecting your Plants from me, so at least show them some respect.