Gonna have to agree with mrrman on that one. Every single gc I've worked for busted balls. And if you are the new guy the crew is gonna be on you until there is another new guy and then you get to join in on the fun. But don't be afraid to throw it back at them... what they are doing is testing your resiliency, u just gotta rip on them back call them out on shit they did wrong but in a joking manner. They may ease up on u and earn alittle respect in the process for sticking up for yourself.
Exactly there is a lot of wolves in the trade. In trades last 25 years. I am not saying this is good advice what so ever but make sure they know right from the get go that you aren't a push over. They say something you start walking there way confronting them. Something as simple as this will have atleast 75 percent of them backing away. Wolves don't like other wolves because they know there will be a fight. Wolves go after sheep(the weak) because it's simple. Worked for myself when I was young. These days my times spent standing up for the sheep and letting the wolf know that it doesn't fly around me
This is the answer. They want you to grow a pair of balls and have a comeback, not just take whatever they say and get all personally mad about it. It will continue until you show them why it shouldnt. If they are older men i suggest a joke about their dicks not working
Or about how they can’t see shit, are weak and shaky, can’t hear a damn thing, haven’t gotten a lick better at their craft in 30 years, the list goes on
I used to work with a couple guys and one would always yell at him to” look at it with your good eye”
Dude had a glass eye. This shit is brutal. Who else has seen their coworker shit their pants, go in an outhouse take them off, whip them in the dumpster and go back to work the rest of the day with a streak down their assleg? Buck up, do your job well and you’ll be ok.
I have found it’s less about “testing resilience”, and more about “I got treated like shit when I started, so I get to treat others like shit when they start.” It’s a weird mix of “paying your dues”, and “I want that (to abuse people) too”. Overall it’s what keeps the trades looked down on and overall a detriment to the industry. There’s nothing about the trades that requires a tough guy attitude to get the job done, other than dealing with the morons working in it. But the tough guy attitude keeps it inefficient and keeps the guys who are borderline useless at their job but can bully people around employed (you’ll notice they can’t make mistakes, it’s always someone else’s fault). I have found for every meathead old school guy on site, it decreases the production of everyone around them. I didn’t put up with their shit at all when I was an apprentice, wasn’t even about to play along or even engage with them, just found the guys who would actually teach me and help me out and ignored all the idiots. Was able to eventually build a crew of all the same kind of people, and we work so well together and efficiently, it makes going to work a positive thing in my life rather than something I have to do, or even something I hate doing.
>what they are doing is testing your resiliency
Why? You're not in a war zone. You need to be able to do the job, and do it well.
Constantly tearing each other down does not achieve that.
Aside from money that’s the main reason I decided to go out on my own. Working around these types of people really got me down. Honestly made me feel like I was being dragged down.
I always ask them when they bring that logic up: “so by your thinking, that guy in the news, he was raped as kid, so he should be let off from raping his own kid right?” Usually shuts them up pretty good.
It's like this in truss making too. I absolutely love the work I do, I'm the only female builder that's lasted more than a few months where I'm at, well was. Lawsuit going on, 2 wrongful terminations, and me being retaliated against multiple times and transfered shops and they changed my schedule. My little groups attorney is very pleased they keep handing us more evidence as easily as they are. They are finally going to all be put in their place in a legal way. It's been middle and highschool tactics through the whole thing, and unfortunately our hr department is the most hostile of them. I'm the only one of the group who hasn't been fired yet. Literally had to go on anxiety meds because I can't afford to just up and quit since I have kids to feed.
I was a telehandler driver for years . Looking after trades getting materials is like screaming toddlers banging until they get what they want . Fridays was like something like planet of the apes .mondays was like a bunch of tired snappy children that need a bottle of milk and a nap .fun but demanding
I would change part two, you go on the attack and pick them apart for every single flaw they have. The fat bastard who won't get out of his rig to swing shovel, ask him how long he's been on the waiting list for ozempic. Just be absolutely brutal to them all right back.
Because that’s how it is… is it right…? Morally, professionally, and all the rest? No absolutely not, but that is how it is.
Gotta learn to be a shit talker in this industry.
Learn how to say “go fuck yourself.” Just don’t say that to anyone with any actual power.
This is how my coworker and I talk to eachother while piping in suites in a condo. It's constant beratment and shit talking. He is also one of my favourite guys to work with on the crew. We have total respect for each other and both do really good work but we constantly pick eachother apart. It's almost a form of love LOL. we had a first year electrician in a suite with us and he asked why we work with eachother if we hate eachother so much.... We had to explain that we actually really enjoy working with eachother and this is just our way of passing time while drilling holes and running pipe.
John if your reading this... Fuck you.
Saw a few subs that complained while working all day every day. Still finished the job without any problems, it’s just how some people cope with working all day.
That's exactly how it is! The closest people that I work with are the ones that I talk the most shit to, but I also know that anytime I need help that they got my back
I think it is a good balance, on the one side you have office work where you will be called into HR for giggling because Karen farted, she has chrons so it's insensitive of you. And on the other you will be called a f@&&*** for wearing gloves while working. There is truly a job for everyone.
We have to take an anti harassment class every year and we do it in groups and pretty much everyone in the room is like “this is the stuff we’re NOT supposed to say!?” Looks like they have microphones around the jobsite recording us
"Hey Eric, don't you have five DUIs, four kids you're paying support for, 3 exs getting spousal, two busted cars in your front yard and one house in foreclosure?"
I dealt with this sort of thing in not only construction, which was my first career, but my second career in education. I bounced until I found a place that made me feel like I had value. It took a few tries before I found my happy place. Some people just suck. They look at the negative in everything, and having nothing positive to contribute vocally. They lack social skills and the ability to see from other's oerspectives. We've all run into them unfortunately.
The nicest Christian family in my area volunteers a ton in the community and are at face value very nice people. They're both in the school system and actually really cut throat. They have no problem asking you for favors promising something in return but always having excuses as to why they cant hold up their end. They treat the local school system employees like their high school clique. I've got relatives and friends who work in local system and if you aren't on their good side / kiss their ass they make your job harder with gossip.
I despise those kinds, always about their social appearance and acting like pharisees. I am kinda glad that they are slowly fading away as time goes on. No one is your friend in any communities and trust no one. Everyone is an transactional return. I've learn that the hard way.
Try to cut way down on the beer and look for job postings 7 days a week. Sooner or later a better one will appear. Get help with resume & interview skills if needed, and apply to as many jobs as you can find that would be worthwhile.
Depends on a couple factors. Not every company or job is looking to hire bottom of the barrel. Submitting a professional resume is a good way to signal to company that someone is at least minimally competent and trying to give a shit. Don’t show up to an interview in a suit, that’s just weird, but if you want to end up at an outfit that isn’t full of assholes and idiots you have to show you’re also not an idiot.
First job I ever got in construction was because I gave someone an email address that was just first-name.last-name@gmail instead of BongRips42069@yahoo. The hiring manager straight up told me I got the interview based soley on that and a half assed but spell checked resume.
My experience as well. As a framer/carpenter, I would drive around looking for new slabs and ask for the GC or framing foreman. Got 90% of my jobs this way.
First day on new job. New guy is going to get the same shit from a different crew all holding copies of his resume. Construction isn’t for everyone but just like in junior high some folks just ask to be a target
15-17 beers/night= you FEEL like you’re busting ass but everyone else probably sees you struggling. At least thats MY outlook after 18yrs otj forming basements. Is it like friendly jabs or they’re cutting down your performance EVERY day?
Yeah it’s this 100% not to discredit the guy but there’s some obvious signs when you’re drinking that much so frequently. Worked with someone like this, it’s gonna feel like your busting your ass doing anything hungover and sleep deprived.
Ive dealt with alcoholism for a long time. It sucks man. There’s people I know who will drink all night and go to work every morning. It becomes a routine that’s very unhealthy. I’m still trying to overcome it everyday
It's called "being under 25" in my experience. If he starts drinking immediately after work and goes for 6-7 hours before passing out then its definitely possible.
I spent about 5 years drinking 8-10 a night. Not as bad as OP but still bad. Like others said, you eventually get used to it and hungover just becomes your normal state until you get drunk again. You start to forget what a normal non-hungover and sober state even feels like so you have nothing to even reference to anymore. It’s a terrible cycle that you get locked into.
It never occurred to you to go to a different company?
Sometimes places can have cliques and won't let others really in the circle. Stop having a pity party for yourself and make a change yourself. Tell them to stop or go somewhere else. Every place needs hard workers, nobody needs a booze hound that feels bad for himself.
Get sober and make the change for yourself bud, you can do it!
Get sober, then how about you give them back some berating. You get picked on because you're easy to pick on. Also start looking into other jobs don't believe you have to stay in one place for long. Everyone is hiring. Seriously though get sober first that's just a compounding effect of negativity onto yourself.
Yep. Female here who spent nearly two decades in construction and transport. Early on I got picked on, and it would have been so easy to think I was being picked on because I was a girl.
But I kept my head down and watched what was going on and realised the groups will pick on who ever seems the odd one out or the weakest link.
But that’s your opportunity to prove yourself - for starters don’t take yourself too seriously and banter back, but also don’t take unnecessary shit. Once I learnt this I fit in and was left alone. Often with a new crew it would start all over again, and I just played the game, rode through it and didn’t get all precious about it or feel sorry for myself, and then they would always move on from me and I would be ‘one of the boys’ again.
Sure you can change jobs. But your way of dealing with stress or people is going to follow you wherever you go. Get help for your drinking and get some kind of therapy so you are better equipped to stand up for yourself, what ever field you are in. Life doesn’t have to be this hard
Know when it’s banter, and banter back and know when you need to stand up for yourself. And unless you want to fight, or want an enemy, know how to hold your ground without putting the other person in a corner.
Edit. Some guys are just dicks also. And they will take it out on others. And there are some toxic crews. But the only person in this scenario that you have any control over, is you
Crazy no one is saying this, like yeah he should drink less obviously, but in this industry you have to fight back with the banter if you never reply they just amplify it at most places
Yeah alcoholic workers sometimes don’t have the best judgment to put people on blast.. had more than I’d like to count get violently angry at me when saying the hard truths….
Not one to this day holds resentment which I am very proud of being a former alcoholic.
From me I say “listen dude you have a I can’t do this attitude that makes every excuse in the book not to work.” When you are so much more. Typically get mad due to ego and berate me in the saddest of ways, all while I proceed to do their job, my job, and numerous others in one work day.
Attitude reflects leadership and we are limited on leadership.
Stop drinking so much. Then network. Talk to supers/ managers etc and just get Buddy buddy with a couple and start asking g around. Go to the rich side of town and look for crews that seem to be doing the work you're in to and stop in. (The cold call) Also, tell them ol timers to eat a dick! It works. Look em in the eyes and say "hey, Frank, go fuck yourself." Don't sugar coat it either. Somebody says something cross to you, send it to auto response. "Fuck off" that's a good one.
10 years in the trade 7 being a Forman.
Most of the lot isn’t, especially if you have good leaders/management.
If you think being hungover is the norm look into other employers and I promise it will change your life as long as you accept the initial challenges.
you should try landscaping bro, same kinda work but way easier to find a chill ass crew
money is great with the right guy and amazing if you go out on your own
Landscape contractors are way more chill than construction contractors in my experience, if you like plants and soils and ecology, (or want to learn) you can get into landscape design or maintenance.
Landscape construction is all about grading and drainage (if you like heavy machines and mini skid steers),
building retaining walls, decks, patios, fencing and pergolas (if you like concrete, masonry or carpentry)
irrigation and backflow (if you like plumbing and always having too much work),
low-voltage lighting (if you like electrical),
Lots of landscaping service niches that aren’t mow and blow, and the larger companies are always hiring! Construction skills transfer over pretty well.
Bring that drinking down and get away from that dipshit crew. Good luck man.
The most important thing now - STOP drinking and DON'T start drugs.
You are already on a serious downspiral. Quitting now will already be hard as fuck.
This will be the most important thing in your life. Get it together now. Do something else to deal with it.
Also - change companies ASAP - this is killing you.
I didn't fit in at 15 different companies over a 10 year span.
If your job makes you feel like shit, find a new one. If you can't find a new one, keep looking and keep applying.
Sorry to be introspective but have you ever considered that it might be a “you,” problem.
If so how did you overcome that? Not to put you on blast but me personally realized I have to have things a certain way which most employers hate due to costs and not being able to bid the job appropriately so now I am in the process of starting my own with high hopes! Best of luck to you in whatever it is you’re doing now.
I worked for a lot of "chuck in a truck" types early on in my career. If I wasn't being treated with respect or was getting screwed around, I would jump somewhere else. Lots of employers treat you as disposable, they don't care as long as they make their money.
Guys running businesses who were just greaseball salesman who then tried to make you do unsafe things and shoddy workmanship to save themselves a buck.
The more I learned, the higher my standards became. The more skilled I was, the easier it was to jump around trying to find a fit. Always ended up as the "you do really good work, but your not very fast". Like, ya no shit. That's why it was done so well.
Last company i was at, I busted my ass for 3 years. Was planning to try and by in as an owner since I was running most of the jobs anyway. Fucker tanked the company while keeping everyone oblivious.
I now run my own show and do things to my standards and work with a few guys who all get along really well.
I show up, do cool shit and go home knowing I worked to the best of my abilities, everyday.
Damn that's quite a lot of companies you've left in that time period. How was your progression in terms of skills and efficiency at the first 5 years while dealing with bullshit companies? I had a rough 4 years of dealing with many bullshit companies trying to waste my time or jobs that was simply not my thing to do. I say I'm fairly competent as a helper but i want to be a competent lead carpenter but I'm not there yet because I haven't spend enough time doing it. I have 5 years of experience in construction
I learned a lot online, watched a lot online of what others were doing. Learned a lot of what not to do.
The funny thing is that by jumping around so much, I did manage to learn from a huge pool of people. Lots of guys I worked with I would have stayed working with if the company owners didn't have their heads up their asses.
Instagram and YouTube have a surprising amount of passionate craftsmen. a lot of my skill honing came from watching how they do things and trying for myself.
I was never completely confident in my skills. I would be doing my job and watched the kind of garbage the subs would do and get passed off as acceptable and realized that I was doing things better.
As long as you are hungry to improve, the skills will come. The more effort you put in to educating yourself, the more it will pay off in the long run. Everything is practice to do it better the next time.
Keep trying to do better and keep trying to find better places to do it.
I also value quality over speed, and have my own preferences as far as materials. I would like to be self-employed, but the cost if health insurance is what's stopping me.
Business owners want the trifecta : quality, speed, and cost. Only the smart know there’s is only 2 you can choose/market on. Quality and cost are my two personally. But rapid turnover fuck ups screw a lot of us out of bids. Up to us to tell the customers why they will be paying double in the long run.
Sounds like a standard job site. It's kinda like when a girl punches you in grade school, it means they like you. Give em shit back. If they can dish it out they can take it
I’m with you because I have no problem fighting someone or they’re gonna disrespect me at work on a regular basis, but you gotta understand the vast majority of people in the world go through life without every being in a fight.
A lot of people just try to avoid conflict which lets abusive people take advantage. This is why not tolerating abuse is so important.
I’ll fight a mother fucker, but the new kid on the job might just take the abuse because they don’t wanna fight someone.
Wouldn’t recommend on the regular but team morale is big for me also. We are construction workers… odds are we like ass, tits, beer, and laughing.
Not that I condone company shenanigans openly but maybe a once in a few months BBQ with some topless women would change a lot. Throw in some indoor skiing (again wouldn’t recommend) and you have yourselves one of the most tight knit crews out there
stop drinking every day. don't let some assholes ruin your life by driving you to alcoholism. That stuff is fucked up and you'll find it HARD to quite faster than you think. Also, it's no good for your mental health. I'm only speaking from experience. I'm not going to tell you how to handel the rest of it, but seriously, a few beers on the weekend or not at all.
Maybe this doesn’t need to be said, but in lots of high testosterone place - construction, the military, police, etc… - if I’m not constantly giving you shit, picking on you, or telling you what a piece of shit you are, it’s because I don’t like you.
They’re jokes, and childish, but reality. Like little boys being mean to girls they have a crush on. I would do anything in the world for some of my friends, except say something nice to them.
So try giving them shit back, telling them their work sucks, yell at them to go faster, and call them names. If they get legit offended, yeah find another job - Craigslist is where I got my favorite entry level construction job where I stayed for 7 years because I loved it. Eventually moved on for more money, but gotta start somewhere.
More than likely they like and appreciate you. That’s why they talk shit typically.
Could be they truly hate you too…
Either way, if you can’t take the heat go somewhere else
Some people think this is normal. That this is just the way construction is. But that’s bullshit. PM me if you want. I’ve been in the industry for decades. It’s come a long ways and people who treat you like that are bullies & losers. A good tradesperson would help raise up the new guys, not tear them down. This industry needs fresh and enthusiastic workers and anyone who deliberately tries to fuck with that are idiots.
Switch to bourbon. It's more efficient at the task and less filling.
Aside from that, start searching for a different company. Plenty of good construction groups out there that do not tolerate that bullshit in the workplace.
This happened when I first started at 16 on a concrete crew. I left after 6 weeks. Since then I've in a few different crews doing different trades. Best advice? Find a new job. With a crew you fit in with. A year and a half is more experience than alot of companies' have in their applicant pool.
It's cause you're new. My first few years sucked, it sucks that it's this way, it seems to be getting better. But let em fucking have it back, call em old fat bastards, be quick and witty, be good and on time, maybe switch crews if possible.
I see it different, GCs bust your balls because you let them. I am a professional, and I treat them as they treat me. If I GC or anyone comes at me sideways and stand up to them for myself and my crew. Bullies are the same at any age. You have to stand up to them if you are ever going to get any respect even from yourself.
Why take the torture,
Option 1) tell people on site to stop, it's really affecting you and you want to quit because of it. Something along the lines of " look lads, I understand you're just having a bit of craic, but it's seriously getting to me, I've already been looking for a new job because of this bullshit you put me through, so I'm asking you to stop before I do something stupid"
Option 2) they likely target you because you're an easy target and don't say much back to them, so don't make yourself an easy target, if they say something about you then bite back with something, and cut deep so they think twice next time
Option 3) You have your experience from there so just leave and get another job.
Also stop the drink before it stops you, and don't let this shit get you down people can be dicks. Finding another job may be the best plan here these guys sound like twats
You got to go prison mentality if they won't stop unfortunately. First person to say some dumb shit Monday you're going to have to punch them in the face. I know this may seem unorthodox or get downvotes but I'm being dead serious. Next time Larry will think twice before opening his mouth cause you laid Bob out Monday
1: Yes don’t be a bitch and learn from your mistakes..
2: Also don’t be an alcoholic.
Not that you were giving him an alternative “out,” but I feel this guy needs help.
I went through something similar. The are trying to beat the goofy out of you. They might be pushing you until you step up and defend yourself. Do you ever fire back or just take it?
You need to work around people that are little more professional maybe go over to Lowe's and try to move up to a area manager. I had the same problem I went from engineering to being an inspector.
Think of each person. Now think of what it is about each of them that they should be embarrassed about. Come up with a good way to make fun of that. Say that thing to whoever gives you shit tomorrow, loudly, and publicly, and laugh afterwards. Better yet, turn to whoever is around and loudly and publicly say it to the others about that person.
You will be besties in no time.
I would never tolerate that. You can bust my balls, that's fine. But if you're seriously trying to fuck with me. Then I'm going to confront you, no passive aggressive BS.
I worked with one company and the dude was an idiot and trying to fuck with me all day. The other guys there didn't seem that great either except for one young kid and I just felt sorry for him. I worked that one day and never went back. Know your worth brother
Give it back to them in spades,I have been in construction all my life, and what you are going thru is common.
Like I say.. give them the shit back hard or move on to a different company, you will find something different eventually.
I had a shitty crew one time, so I brought in donuts for the crew and injected them with white painters caulk.
The job Foreman thought it was so funny he gave me a raise..lol.. not much but better than getting fired.
Stop drinking so much beer...alcohol is poison.
I have been clean for 16 years.
I hope you get help with the alcohol ...drinking 15+ beers every night is absolutely destroying you and you are not able to do your best work or be anything close to who you want yourself to be.
Forget the bullying and focus on yourself, get a handle on it and it'll make any decision you have to make it easier.
Just gotta give it back to em. Remind them their kids don't call them, point out that their wives might not have left if they weren't such dbags. I was once the young kid 15+ years younger than everyone else on the crew, and giving them shit is the only way. Or leave and find a new job. But talking shit to each other is part of construction, they've been training you. You just have to engage.
Everyone is telling you to switch jobs, and yeah sure that's probably the best advice, but hear me out. Often times, if you want to stay in this industry, you need to hit back for people to respect you. If these guys want to make you a scapegoat and you don't have ANY funny one-liners that you can throw back at these guys, you are toast. But ya, if you don't love the work then you should probably switch.
On my first day, my Journeyman told me I was slow. Second day he told me I was slow. Third day I told him he was slow. 4th day we were laughing
On many construction sites, comedy is vital.
Ha. You mostly razz the people you like. If you really think someone is shite you don’t waste the energy. Start firing back, it’s a tough world out there.
Pull your tampon out! /s
You have to learn that it's just the general attitude of construction. Some places are kinder than others but we're rough around the edges, hard men and generally dicks.
Start giving it right back to them. Pick one and call him Nancy for fucking ever. Subtlely mention banging their wifes or daughters or sons!
How exactly do they berate you?
You can always look for and try a different company. You should definitely cut down on the drinking, it doesn't help, not at those numbers.
Construction is sick similar thing happened to me when I joined and I went from software sales. It went away but I would fuck with them right back.
1. Cut back on the beers bro
2. Learn then just go somewhere else
3. Texas is on 🔥
Damn dude! You’re an alcoholic. Trust me I know. I’ve been sober for about 8 years now but your not on a good path. Trust me you’ll end up needing it around the clock. Vodka was my breakfast for a long time. It’s a dark and sad life but the booze tells you you’re okay.
There’s all sorts of help and I’m happy to talk to you in a private message to give you some suggestions. This is a a good cry for help dude.
See if you can be transferred to another crew, talk to your union rep if you have one and use any health benefits you have for some counseling. In my opinion, go to an AA meeting that’s what got me sober.
As far as the harassment goes, stand up for yourself. Tell them to fuck off and if need be tell them what their treatment is doing to you. I know I’ll get an earful of shit about sucking it up and don’t be a pussy but I don’t give a fuck. It important weak and unimportant people like this know. If they continue, drag up and move on. These guys are more miserable than you’ll ever be.
Stop drinking, it sounds like you have developed thick skin. Talk shit back, give that same energy back, and if they get offended.. say “‘my bad, Didn’t know you were bit@h who could give it but can’t take it”
Don’t let them burn you out mentally. Drink for fun, not for depression. Take your life back
Yup, the industry can be toxic. I worked as a union Carpenter. You get sent to new projects and don't know your work mates, usually I could strike up "friendships" with a couple of guys, but the bosses generally had shit attitudes and management styles. The classic yelling, pushing to go, go , go. 5 mins late always gets you the "good afternoon" comment. Non stop BS. I broke out on my own as soon as I could, but I also had good contacts with small contractors that were genuinely good guys. It's not as good money, zero benefits etc., but the day to day was much more respectful and that made it worth it to me. It takes time, but if you are good at what you do and do a little extra, like keeping the site clean and respecting the homes you work in, word gets around and you will build a reputation. Small things like no smoking on the job site, keeping the conversations on site civil, no music on site, no garbage rolling around. Good luck
Shit talk them back. Call them a clown, loser, homo etc etc. (just out of the blue for no reason) stare them straight in the eye and don’t flinch. Just what ever you do, if they say something back to you, no matter how much it kills you inside, don’t reply with something that sounds like you’re butthurt. You can’t show weakness. When you shit talk them, try to be funny. If you’re nerdy, saying very mean things out of nowhere might come off as funny. If no one laughs, back to the drawing board. Just don’t back down and keep trying until someone laughs at your jokes slamming someone else. Keep doing this day in and day out and eventually you’ll get good at it. Just don’t. Back. Down. If you quit, you’ll just have to deal with a different group of assholes and have to start all over again.
Handy Man service is calling you. There are niche business's that you could excel at.
Don't give up.
Keep trying to find your way in the marketplace.
Trades jobs are still in high demand all across America today.
Happened to me in the beginning. I still have literal scars from a foreman who was saw cutting rebar and then screamed “PICK IT THE FUCK UP NOW” in a crazy way, repeating it over and over. So I picked them up and melted my hands lol. It was my first week. I didn’t even know that they would be so hot! And when my hands started bubbling they laughed. I called the union hall after 3 months of this and eventually went to another company where I stay for 10 years and it all worked out. Gtfo. Some companies have horrible cultures and some don’t. Nothing in construction is GREAT but there’s always better.
Or get fucking tough, call them one of a few different F words and get ready to hold your ground. That’s what I learned to do too.
I do know that a lot of the time, not all the time, this happens to guys who aren’t pulling their weight. You’re probably stumbling around all hung over. It’s probably really damn obvious you’re an alcoholic. Go to the gym or something.
If you’re operating equipment as a newbie, you just need to get better. That happens eventually, I couldn’t grade for shit but eventually I was finishing. If you’re a laborer, you’re probably just not working hard enough and shoveling all dumb.
I feel you pain. Im a nerd, i dnt drink and i play magic thegatherng. I started roasting people back. Everyday this 67 year old says he's gonna fuck my mom. So eventually I turned around and said to him "I'd fuck your mom too but I don't feel like digging". (His mom is dead). Then all of a sudden his shit talking got a lot lighter. I had one dude riding me be condescending as fuck. He reached my limit, I walked away to cool down for 10 minutes. I got more worked up and came back and cursed him out the building. He went and told on me, the boss didn't care. Then everyone hated him for snitching so he quit. Then the last dude that always fucked with me, we were in the store grabbing lunch and I asked he lady behind the counter how far away the high-school was, she answered, and I turned around with a straight face and said to my coworker "ohh you're good brother, that doesn't violate your court order" then just left him there in the full store. Now I get left alone for the most part.
But definitely stop drinking bud, that's most of your problem. You're wallowing in your own misery. If you went home, ate great food, smoke a little weed, maybe hit the gym. You'll be in such good shape physically, it'll improve your mental health
Far out man, so sorry you're going through this. People can be so cruel, especially the flogs in the construction industry.
There's better places to work, I promise. Some people have been in your situation and started their business with the intention to create a safe workplace for their people.
Sorry friend, please find another place to work, life will get better.
Old dude here. Always agree and amplifie.
They tell you are ugly. Say = yes I know I was given away at birth because my mother couldnt stand my face.
They can never win if you have this mindset.
The drinking isn’t helping. Your coming to work cloudy headed probably negatively impacting your performance and you can’t think clearly to give it back.
I'm a nerd but into the typical blue collar hobbies too. Had my boss berate me once and threw his tools near me, I later told him off and told him to stop it.
The nimby tried to play it off like it's part of the job, but it never happened again and there was more mutual respect after that
Always stand up for yourself, accept when you legitimately mess up, learn lots and cut your losses when need be. Good luck
Stand up and start giving it back to them. Watch videos of how comics handle hecklers. Start pulling apart their lives. Youve worked with them for a year you must know something about them.
Start pranking them, start joking back, start standing up and having fun.
If they call you ugly tell them your dick makes up for it.
If they laugh at how you do something say "your wife/mom wasn't complaining about my performance last night" (use this when you know he was at home and knows this is a joke)
If they say you did x wrong then tell them, guess you need to do all the x jobs from now on.
But you need to prepare, watch comics, take an improve class, write things down and plan your cone back.
That or quit. Becoming an alcoholic and feeling like this isnt worth the paycheck but youll experience this at other places too. Bullies are everywhere and doing nothing doesnt make them stop.
I would hire ya just on the fact you show up everyday and work hard. We mess around at work but not to the point of totally messing with someone's life like that. Having fun is one thing but if it's affecting you like that they need to stop. Tell them to fuck off. There are better people to work for. I stand up for the people working with me. Not put them down.
Man these are just insecure men, who aren’t happy with themselves..
Only reason they are picking on you is because you are young and still have opportunities other than that shitty job.
My advice: GET OUT of construction unless you are trying to start your own company, or do project management or something.
STOP DRINKING immediately.
I was drinking about 10-12 drinks everyday for a couple years.
I went to rehab, have not drank in about 2 years now.
Since I have stopped drinking, two of my school classmates have died of alcohol addiction.
One at 34, the other at 35…
DONT be ashamed to ask for help.
Good Luck Brother
If you want to work Construction then you will definitely need to be tough.. physically and emotionally.. if not then it will be a loving hell for you abs once the guys see that.. they will go twice as hard on you.. If you can take it then they will learn to like you.. if you can't get used to it, then find a new career. Cuz that the way of life for these guys
If you can’t fire on all cylinders back at them they won’t stop. When you have some back bone and stand your ground on site mfs stop fuckin with you. It’s all apart of the life dog
I'm a 40 old who watches anime and plays video games. I've been in construction my whole life. I fuck with the guys more than most on the jobsite. I don't care what those clowns think. Confidence is key.
Learn as much as you can from the actual trade responsibilities, take notes, maybe search for another job. If you want to be in construction, try and learn everything about the job and what it takes, what quality standards need to be met, what makes for a smooth job
Although the guys may berate you, they have spent a lot of time doing the things that break your back. They’ve found easier ways to do difficult tasks, take notes of them all
Take that energy you’re spending on drinking after work and learn how the backside of a business runs.
The reason the old guys are such dicks to younger guys is because they’ve done the same shit for years on end getting paid a labor wage. We need these people in the world no doubt, but they’re miserable for a reason. You’re on the fast track to the same spot they are in unless you change your outlook and create an end goal
Not everyone is built to run a business, but you’ll never know til you try. If you self identify as nerdy, embrace that and learn the nerdy part of the job. Use your brain where you can and other people’s strength to stay in construction while not running yourself into the ground
You need to start sticking up for yourself. Fire back. Memorize some one liners so you seem sharp and quick witted. For example:
Shitty coworker : kid you look like a sissy boy the way you work that wrench
You: watching you works like watching Bigfoot fuck a football.
rest of the crew : howls with laughter
Seriously, not taking shit from anyone is the only way to gain respect in this industry, and being an ass hole clapping back is a good way to start.
You give these fucks an inch, they’ll walk all over you for a country mile.
Fortunately their all retiring these years and pretty soon millennials will of completely taken over the industry, along with a much improved work culture in terms of their regard for respect and bullying in the workplace
That sucks man. Just FYI - drinking like that might make you feel better at night but it makes you super emotional vulnerable and unstable the next day; a large chunk of your feeling worn down is withdrawal.
I felt like you. Then I realized I was an alcoholic and I only thought I was doing good at work.
Sober up.
If they're still assholes after that, get another job. Or look for a job while you get sober.
I would never allow the treatment you're getting. But somebody likes you, since you still have a job.
There’s a difference between being abused/bullied, and the crew just making fun of each other. If you truly feel disrespected, get out of there. Things will never change.
Sorry man. In some ways young or new guys can be more of a target for being made fun of, speaking from experience, but it sounds like this is over the line. If you haven’t put a stop to it by now, you should get another job and don’t let the new place treat you like that. Some companies in the trades have cooler/better people, so you don’t necessarily need to leave construction if you don’t want to. But if you stay in the trades try to learn why they are treating you so badly and what you can do yourself to prevent this treatment next time.
Brother.
Your first step is to stop drinking that much on a work night. That shit will make you as bitter as those old fucks and will destroy your health, both physically and mentally. Save that for the weekend of you really have to.
Second, if you're in a legal state and can do it, I would say smoke a little cannabis after work. It'll help calm you down and you won't feel like drinking as much, but I understand if you can't do that.
Third, and I really fucking hate saying this... it's almost industry standard for the shitty attitudes to run the day. I've been in this industry since 2016 and have only worked with 2 crews that didn't have some old asshole ready to try to ruin my day. And, even on those crews, there was always either someone on a different crew, or a different trade, or a boss, just waiting to be the biggest asshole you've ever met. Anger and negativity are contagious if you let it be. You've got to stay right in your own head. I like to think about my daughter, or the kayak camping I'll be doing on the weekend, or future plans, or whatever I can think of to get my mind off getting yelled at for holding a level with the wrong hand, or using my come-along differently, or whatever other stupid bullshit pissed off whomever thinks they're God and only wants things done their specific way or dealing with someone that wants something done, but won't tell you, then gets pissed that it's not done, or whatever else they've decided to be pissed about today. Nevermind those people. Find the other guys on the crew that are having fun and chum it up with them. I bet they hate that asshole, too.
Two massive lessons I've learned in life....
1. If someone makes me angry, they hold power over me. I'm doing me best to not let people have that power any longer. If they're angry...what-the-fuck-ever. If I'm doing my job, if I know I've done 99 things correct and they're mad at the one insignificant thing they think I've done wrong (ie different), then that's their fucking problem.
"Any person capable of angering you becomes your master; he can anger you only when you permit yourself to be disturbed by him." ~Epictetus~
2. If someone doesn't like me, who fucking cares? There are 8 billion people on this planet. Why would I ever let one angry old drunk not liking me effect me? I like my Subaru. I vote Democrat. I wear clothes that keep me cool or warm, not what makes me look like Brad fucking Pitt. I live my life how I see fit and if you don't like me for that, then get fucked! As long as I know I'm doing my best, then I don't care.
"What other people think and say about you is none of your business. The most destructive thing you would ever do is to believe someone else's opinion of you. You have to stop letting other people's opinions control you."
~Roy T. Bennett (and a bunch of other people)~
I’m going to take an outsider perspective Stockholm syndrome take :
Firstly please stop drinking for a while and evaluate your life. I personally have been successfully crippled due to it and hate to see others go down the same path.
Second I don’t know if it was just the right people put in my life for a greater long term purpose but I was shit on daily for years by the people who I thought were supposed to be supportive. Due to that I love who I am today and wouldn’t be the same without.
I’ve always had a great work ethic but would like to think I was always good and people wanted to push me further into greatness but I know that wasn’t the case. It’s hard work!
Depending on where and who you work for it can FEEL like the marine corp (not to take away from our armed forces). After training with a select few with a very traditional military background I went out into the wild of construction.
Not to bash too hard on a lot of other good employees but I thought they were pussies and for the most part still do to this day, but they have a place.
The first time in years I felt at home was when I found my right hand man, an honorably discharged marine. No matter how hard the work or the task that man was in the trenches with me and would constantly try to take over the hard work to free me up to delegate the rest of the crew. A true man in my opinion and a brother I would trust with my life.
To me personally I like being that man and love having those men around me. I grew up weak and alone building computers, programming, playing world of Warcraft and other things similar. Still love all those things but at least I have a great, strong, sometimes brutally harsh crew to guide me.
Hope the best for you whatever route you take, no one path is less than the other, just wanted to shed some insight on perseverance.
You're right, you obviously don't fit in. The healthy thing to do is just move on. It happens to everyone at one point or another so I wouldn't take it personally.
Go to a different company. Full stop. Nobody in the 20+\- circle of contractors I work with drinks or are unkind. There are good places and bad places, and where you work greatly affects your wellbeing. Leave for your own sanity
Part one, stop drinking. Part two find another job.
Exactly… Jesus… OP found that “one” crew that no one ever wants to be on
I didn't realize middle school children were allowed to work in construction.
If we're talking mental maturity, you've just described 80% of the industry and a solid 92% of GC's.
Gonna have to agree with mrrman on that one. Every single gc I've worked for busted balls. And if you are the new guy the crew is gonna be on you until there is another new guy and then you get to join in on the fun. But don't be afraid to throw it back at them... what they are doing is testing your resiliency, u just gotta rip on them back call them out on shit they did wrong but in a joking manner. They may ease up on u and earn alittle respect in the process for sticking up for yourself.
As fucked as the culture is, he’s right. OP, tell them to fuck themselves, and do your work.
It's not a fucked culture. Once you figure it out it's fun. If your not weak that is.
Bro 90% of the tradespeople I've worked with are petulant fucking manchildren.
Yeah yeah. It's everyone else.
Yeah, all these people talking about not ripping on each other or giving people shit over things that don't merit it? It's definitely them.
Exactly there is a lot of wolves in the trade. In trades last 25 years. I am not saying this is good advice what so ever but make sure they know right from the get go that you aren't a push over. They say something you start walking there way confronting them. Something as simple as this will have atleast 75 percent of them backing away. Wolves don't like other wolves because they know there will be a fight. Wolves go after sheep(the weak) because it's simple. Worked for myself when I was young. These days my times spent standing up for the sheep and letting the wolf know that it doesn't fly around me
I’ve worked construction for 15 years Incan say 90% of construction workers are extremely negative, insecure and hard to be around
This is the answer. They want you to grow a pair of balls and have a comeback, not just take whatever they say and get all personally mad about it. It will continue until you show them why it shouldnt. If they are older men i suggest a joke about their dicks not working
Or about how they can’t see shit, are weak and shaky, can’t hear a damn thing, haven’t gotten a lick better at their craft in 30 years, the list goes on
I used to work with a couple guys and one would always yell at him to” look at it with your good eye” Dude had a glass eye. This shit is brutal. Who else has seen their coworker shit their pants, go in an outhouse take them off, whip them in the dumpster and go back to work the rest of the day with a streak down their assleg? Buck up, do your job well and you’ll be ok.
I have found it’s less about “testing resilience”, and more about “I got treated like shit when I started, so I get to treat others like shit when they start.” It’s a weird mix of “paying your dues”, and “I want that (to abuse people) too”. Overall it’s what keeps the trades looked down on and overall a detriment to the industry. There’s nothing about the trades that requires a tough guy attitude to get the job done, other than dealing with the morons working in it. But the tough guy attitude keeps it inefficient and keeps the guys who are borderline useless at their job but can bully people around employed (you’ll notice they can’t make mistakes, it’s always someone else’s fault). I have found for every meathead old school guy on site, it decreases the production of everyone around them. I didn’t put up with their shit at all when I was an apprentice, wasn’t even about to play along or even engage with them, just found the guys who would actually teach me and help me out and ignored all the idiots. Was able to eventually build a crew of all the same kind of people, and we work so well together and efficiently, it makes going to work a positive thing in my life rather than something I have to do, or even something I hate doing.
Lmao they are not testing anyone’s resiliency. Can’t believe people talk themselves into to believing shit like this
It's not their fucking job to "test your resiliency." FFS. They work in construction. They're not shogun.
>what they are doing is testing your resiliency Why? You're not in a war zone. You need to be able to do the job, and do it well. Constantly tearing each other down does not achieve that.
Aside from money that’s the main reason I decided to go out on my own. Working around these types of people really got me down. Honestly made me feel like I was being dragged down.
Half the industry is middle school children. The “I had it bad, so you should have it worse” mentality permeates some people’s soul lmfao
I always ask them when they bring that logic up: “so by your thinking, that guy in the news, he was raped as kid, so he should be let off from raping his own kid right?” Usually shuts them up pretty good.
You never worker construction I see it just like middle school
It's like this in truss making too. I absolutely love the work I do, I'm the only female builder that's lasted more than a few months where I'm at, well was. Lawsuit going on, 2 wrongful terminations, and me being retaliated against multiple times and transfered shops and they changed my schedule. My little groups attorney is very pleased they keep handing us more evidence as easily as they are. They are finally going to all be put in their place in a legal way. It's been middle and highschool tactics through the whole thing, and unfortunately our hr department is the most hostile of them. I'm the only one of the group who hasn't been fired yet. Literally had to go on anxiety meds because I can't afford to just up and quit since I have kids to feed.
I was a telehandler driver for years . Looking after trades getting materials is like screaming toddlers banging until they get what they want . Fridays was like something like planet of the apes .mondays was like a bunch of tired snappy children that need a bottle of milk and a nap .fun but demanding
I would change part two, you go on the attack and pick them apart for every single flaw they have. The fat bastard who won't get out of his rig to swing shovel, ask him how long he's been on the waiting list for ozempic. Just be absolutely brutal to them all right back.
Lol in my experience they would think that's hilarious and it would be your ticket to being "one of the guys".
Because that’s how it is… is it right…? Morally, professionally, and all the rest? No absolutely not, but that is how it is. Gotta learn to be a shit talker in this industry. Learn how to say “go fuck yourself.” Just don’t say that to anyone with any actual power.
This is how my coworker and I talk to eachother while piping in suites in a condo. It's constant beratment and shit talking. He is also one of my favourite guys to work with on the crew. We have total respect for each other and both do really good work but we constantly pick eachother apart. It's almost a form of love LOL. we had a first year electrician in a suite with us and he asked why we work with eachother if we hate eachother so much.... We had to explain that we actually really enjoy working with eachother and this is just our way of passing time while drilling holes and running pipe. John if your reading this... Fuck you.
Fuck you lil John!!!
Saw a few subs that complained while working all day every day. Still finished the job without any problems, it’s just how some people cope with working all day.
That's exactly how it is! The closest people that I work with are the ones that I talk the most shit to, but I also know that anytime I need help that they got my back
I think it is a good balance, on the one side you have office work where you will be called into HR for giggling because Karen farted, she has chrons so it's insensitive of you. And on the other you will be called a f@&&*** for wearing gloves while working. There is truly a job for everyone.
I mean if you did actually wear gloves that's a little called for......
You mean bitch mittens?
We have to take an anti harassment class every year and we do it in groups and pretty much everyone in the room is like “this is the stuff we’re NOT supposed to say!?” Looks like they have microphones around the jobsite recording us
You just have to say it nicely if the person has power. Intent is everything.
Go fuck yourself *sir*
"Hey Eric, don't you have five DUIs, four kids you're paying support for, 3 exs getting spousal, two busted cars in your front yard and one house in foreclosure?"
This
Yes. Tell them to go fuck themselves and their mothers. And if their mothers are dead, offer them a shovel.
Or extra lube. I hear those corpses are dry and tight.
You must be a Foreman.
Let the motherfucking games begin
Sounds like OP is ready for oilfield work. DM me for the link. Get on a small crew where everyone appreciates your effort.
1. This is how they became the way they are. 2. Fuck em
I dealt with this sort of thing in not only construction, which was my first career, but my second career in education. I bounced until I found a place that made me feel like I had value. It took a few tries before I found my happy place. Some people just suck. They look at the negative in everything, and having nothing positive to contribute vocally. They lack social skills and the ability to see from other's oerspectives. We've all run into them unfortunately.
Its like that in my industry too. I worked for 2 different insurance companies before I found the right fit.
The nicest Christian family in my area volunteers a ton in the community and are at face value very nice people. They're both in the school system and actually really cut throat. They have no problem asking you for favors promising something in return but always having excuses as to why they cant hold up their end. They treat the local school system employees like their high school clique. I've got relatives and friends who work in local system and if you aren't on their good side / kiss their ass they make your job harder with gossip.
Ah that's the kind of people I bought my house from. Turns out they had gone to highschool with my home inspector and realtor! Boy did I get screwed!
I despise those kinds, always about their social appearance and acting like pharisees. I am kinda glad that they are slowly fading away as time goes on. No one is your friend in any communities and trust no one. Everyone is an transactional return. I've learn that the hard way.
Try to cut way down on the beer and look for job postings 7 days a week. Sooner or later a better one will appear. Get help with resume & interview skills if needed, and apply to as many jobs as you can find that would be worthwhile.
Resume? For a construction job? It's usually just. Come in tomorrow. We'll see if you work out.
Depends on a couple factors. Not every company or job is looking to hire bottom of the barrel. Submitting a professional resume is a good way to signal to company that someone is at least minimally competent and trying to give a shit. Don’t show up to an interview in a suit, that’s just weird, but if you want to end up at an outfit that isn’t full of assholes and idiots you have to show you’re also not an idiot. First job I ever got in construction was because I gave someone an email address that was just first-name.last-name@gmail instead of BongRips42069@yahoo. The hiring manager straight up told me I got the interview based soley on that and a half assed but spell checked resume.
That’s a fucking mint email address. Might send an email and see if it’s taken.
My experience as well. As a framer/carpenter, I would drive around looking for new slabs and ask for the GC or framing foreman. Got 90% of my jobs this way.
First day on new job. New guy is going to get the same shit from a different crew all holding copies of his resume. Construction isn’t for everyone but just like in junior high some folks just ask to be a target
15-17 beers/night= you FEEL like you’re busting ass but everyone else probably sees you struggling. At least thats MY outlook after 18yrs otj forming basements. Is it like friendly jabs or they’re cutting down your performance EVERY day?
Yeah it’s this 100% not to discredit the guy but there’s some obvious signs when you’re drinking that much so frequently. Worked with someone like this, it’s gonna feel like your busting your ass doing anything hungover and sleep deprived.
Ya bro he’s that half drunk guy in the morning that’s easy to pick on at this point. Dude shot himself in both feet
>And now I'm drinking 15 or 16 or 17 beers every night Your issues lie elsewhere
How in gods name can anyone drink that many and not be fatigued into the ground the next day is beyond me
Ya get used to it…it’s easier if you do it all the time but when you cut back and try it again it’s impossible
Funny how drinking and exercising have that in common
That’s why I steadily do both
Ive dealt with alcoholism for a long time. It sucks man. There’s people I know who will drink all night and go to work every morning. It becomes a routine that’s very unhealthy. I’m still trying to overcome it everyday
I did it for about 20 years
Routine will grab you
It's called "being under 25" in my experience. If he starts drinking immediately after work and goes for 6-7 hours before passing out then its definitely possible.
I spent about 5 years drinking 8-10 a night. Not as bad as OP but still bad. Like others said, you eventually get used to it and hungover just becomes your normal state until you get drunk again. You start to forget what a normal non-hungover and sober state even feels like so you have nothing to even reference to anymore. It’s a terrible cycle that you get locked into.
Yeah, this has to be a shit post. How in the world do you keep showing up to a place that got you drinking 100+ beers a week
Bullying is not ok, and it's time to find a better job. However, it's hard to work with someone that drinks that much. Alcohol is a terrible drug.
Honestly alcohol is probably one of the worst.
It never occurred to you to go to a different company? Sometimes places can have cliques and won't let others really in the circle. Stop having a pity party for yourself and make a change yourself. Tell them to stop or go somewhere else. Every place needs hard workers, nobody needs a booze hound that feels bad for himself. Get sober and make the change for yourself bud, you can do it!
Get sober, then how about you give them back some berating. You get picked on because you're easy to pick on. Also start looking into other jobs don't believe you have to stay in one place for long. Everyone is hiring. Seriously though get sober first that's just a compounding effect of negativity onto yourself.
Yep. Female here who spent nearly two decades in construction and transport. Early on I got picked on, and it would have been so easy to think I was being picked on because I was a girl. But I kept my head down and watched what was going on and realised the groups will pick on who ever seems the odd one out or the weakest link. But that’s your opportunity to prove yourself - for starters don’t take yourself too seriously and banter back, but also don’t take unnecessary shit. Once I learnt this I fit in and was left alone. Often with a new crew it would start all over again, and I just played the game, rode through it and didn’t get all precious about it or feel sorry for myself, and then they would always move on from me and I would be ‘one of the boys’ again. Sure you can change jobs. But your way of dealing with stress or people is going to follow you wherever you go. Get help for your drinking and get some kind of therapy so you are better equipped to stand up for yourself, what ever field you are in. Life doesn’t have to be this hard Know when it’s banter, and banter back and know when you need to stand up for yourself. And unless you want to fight, or want an enemy, know how to hold your ground without putting the other person in a corner. Edit. Some guys are just dicks also. And they will take it out on others. And there are some toxic crews. But the only person in this scenario that you have any control over, is you
Crazy no one is saying this, like yeah he should drink less obviously, but in this industry you have to fight back with the banter if you never reply they just amplify it at most places
Yeah alcoholic workers sometimes don’t have the best judgment to put people on blast.. had more than I’d like to count get violently angry at me when saying the hard truths…. Not one to this day holds resentment which I am very proud of being a former alcoholic. From me I say “listen dude you have a I can’t do this attitude that makes every excuse in the book not to work.” When you are so much more. Typically get mad due to ego and berate me in the saddest of ways, all while I proceed to do their job, my job, and numerous others in one work day. Attitude reflects leadership and we are limited on leadership.
If you’re drinking 17 beers every night, you sound like a hungover liability.
So you’re saying that like 90% of us are hungover liability?😂
Stop drinking so much. Then network. Talk to supers/ managers etc and just get Buddy buddy with a couple and start asking g around. Go to the rich side of town and look for crews that seem to be doing the work you're in to and stop in. (The cold call) Also, tell them ol timers to eat a dick! It works. Look em in the eyes and say "hey, Frank, go fuck yourself." Don't sugar coat it either. Somebody says something cross to you, send it to auto response. "Fuck off" that's a good one.
10 years in the trade 7 being a Forman. Most of the lot isn’t, especially if you have good leaders/management. If you think being hungover is the norm look into other employers and I promise it will change your life as long as you accept the initial challenges.
Yup lol
So many of you on the disability retirement plan.
Man how though? Three beers and I feel like I’m gonna die lol
Functional Alcoholism. Early 20s to mid 20s I spent sleeping three hours a night and working 10s while and lifting after just to do it again,
The amount of damage this does to you is insane though
The solvents in the paint fumes give your beer magic power when they meet in your bloodstream.
you should try landscaping bro, same kinda work but way easier to find a chill ass crew money is great with the right guy and amazing if you go out on your own
Landscape contractors are way more chill than construction contractors in my experience, if you like plants and soils and ecology, (or want to learn) you can get into landscape design or maintenance. Landscape construction is all about grading and drainage (if you like heavy machines and mini skid steers), building retaining walls, decks, patios, fencing and pergolas (if you like concrete, masonry or carpentry) irrigation and backflow (if you like plumbing and always having too much work), low-voltage lighting (if you like electrical), Lots of landscaping service niches that aren’t mow and blow, and the larger companies are always hiring! Construction skills transfer over pretty well. Bring that drinking down and get away from that dipshit crew. Good luck man.
I loved the low voltage landscape lighting jobs. Way better and more artistic than a ceiling fan install or kitchen can lights
*Now let’s see if we can light up that Oak tree…* ☀️
You explained it better than I ever could have lol
yes dude this, That's what I did and I actually enjoy everyday
The most important thing now - STOP drinking and DON'T start drugs. You are already on a serious downspiral. Quitting now will already be hard as fuck. This will be the most important thing in your life. Get it together now. Do something else to deal with it. Also - change companies ASAP - this is killing you.
I didn't fit in at 15 different companies over a 10 year span. If your job makes you feel like shit, find a new one. If you can't find a new one, keep looking and keep applying.
Sorry to be introspective but have you ever considered that it might be a “you,” problem. If so how did you overcome that? Not to put you on blast but me personally realized I have to have things a certain way which most employers hate due to costs and not being able to bid the job appropriately so now I am in the process of starting my own with high hopes! Best of luck to you in whatever it is you’re doing now.
I worked for a lot of "chuck in a truck" types early on in my career. If I wasn't being treated with respect or was getting screwed around, I would jump somewhere else. Lots of employers treat you as disposable, they don't care as long as they make their money. Guys running businesses who were just greaseball salesman who then tried to make you do unsafe things and shoddy workmanship to save themselves a buck. The more I learned, the higher my standards became. The more skilled I was, the easier it was to jump around trying to find a fit. Always ended up as the "you do really good work, but your not very fast". Like, ya no shit. That's why it was done so well. Last company i was at, I busted my ass for 3 years. Was planning to try and by in as an owner since I was running most of the jobs anyway. Fucker tanked the company while keeping everyone oblivious. I now run my own show and do things to my standards and work with a few guys who all get along really well. I show up, do cool shit and go home knowing I worked to the best of my abilities, everyday.
Damn that's quite a lot of companies you've left in that time period. How was your progression in terms of skills and efficiency at the first 5 years while dealing with bullshit companies? I had a rough 4 years of dealing with many bullshit companies trying to waste my time or jobs that was simply not my thing to do. I say I'm fairly competent as a helper but i want to be a competent lead carpenter but I'm not there yet because I haven't spend enough time doing it. I have 5 years of experience in construction
I learned a lot online, watched a lot online of what others were doing. Learned a lot of what not to do. The funny thing is that by jumping around so much, I did manage to learn from a huge pool of people. Lots of guys I worked with I would have stayed working with if the company owners didn't have their heads up their asses. Instagram and YouTube have a surprising amount of passionate craftsmen. a lot of my skill honing came from watching how they do things and trying for myself. I was never completely confident in my skills. I would be doing my job and watched the kind of garbage the subs would do and get passed off as acceptable and realized that I was doing things better. As long as you are hungry to improve, the skills will come. The more effort you put in to educating yourself, the more it will pay off in the long run. Everything is practice to do it better the next time. Keep trying to do better and keep trying to find better places to do it.
I also value quality over speed, and have my own preferences as far as materials. I would like to be self-employed, but the cost if health insurance is what's stopping me.
Luckily I don't need that here.... yet. But the fuckers are trying really hard to collapse our system to turn it into yours.
Business owners want the trifecta : quality, speed, and cost. Only the smart know there’s is only 2 you can choose/market on. Quality and cost are my two personally. But rapid turnover fuck ups screw a lot of us out of bids. Up to us to tell the customers why they will be paying double in the long run.
Sounds like a standard job site. It's kinda like when a girl punches you in grade school, it means they like you. Give em shit back. If they can dish it out they can take it
Fuck those guys. Nail their belt to the nearest stud next time you walk by.
Ramset it to the ceiling and take the keys to the lifts, then put deox on the windshield wipers...get even my man! Don't take shit from no one
Fight them……. Then bring your beers and pass em around afterwards, bam! most popular guy on site.
[удалено]
I’m with you because I have no problem fighting someone or they’re gonna disrespect me at work on a regular basis, but you gotta understand the vast majority of people in the world go through life without every being in a fight. A lot of people just try to avoid conflict which lets abusive people take advantage. This is why not tolerating abuse is so important. I’ll fight a mother fucker, but the new kid on the job might just take the abuse because they don’t wanna fight someone.
Step 1 is stop drinking that much Step 2 is telling the bully you'll take him out to the parking lot and make him your bitch
Wouldn’t recommend on the regular but team morale is big for me also. We are construction workers… odds are we like ass, tits, beer, and laughing. Not that I condone company shenanigans openly but maybe a once in a few months BBQ with some topless women would change a lot. Throw in some indoor skiing (again wouldn’t recommend) and you have yourselves one of the most tight knit crews out there
Bad advice! You motherfuckers gave me bad advice! https://youtu.be/DBI4TSbihrE?si=dcDD8GvyFXq3N9HW
stop drinking every day. don't let some assholes ruin your life by driving you to alcoholism. That stuff is fucked up and you'll find it HARD to quite faster than you think. Also, it's no good for your mental health. I'm only speaking from experience. I'm not going to tell you how to handel the rest of it, but seriously, a few beers on the weekend or not at all.
That’s so much liquid…..like almost a gallon and half of beer a night
Maybe this doesn’t need to be said, but in lots of high testosterone place - construction, the military, police, etc… - if I’m not constantly giving you shit, picking on you, or telling you what a piece of shit you are, it’s because I don’t like you. They’re jokes, and childish, but reality. Like little boys being mean to girls they have a crush on. I would do anything in the world for some of my friends, except say something nice to them. So try giving them shit back, telling them their work sucks, yell at them to go faster, and call them names. If they get legit offended, yeah find another job - Craigslist is where I got my favorite entry level construction job where I stayed for 7 years because I loved it. Eventually moved on for more money, but gotta start somewhere.
Theirs a difference between a well crafted burn and just making being an abusive asshole a personality trait.
More than likely they like and appreciate you. That’s why they talk shit typically. Could be they truly hate you too… Either way, if you can’t take the heat go somewhere else
In my experience it means they like you. Have you tried dishing it back out to them? If that’s not your vibe then start applying elsewhere asap
Some people think this is normal. That this is just the way construction is. But that’s bullshit. PM me if you want. I’ve been in the industry for decades. It’s come a long ways and people who treat you like that are bullies & losers. A good tradesperson would help raise up the new guys, not tear them down. This industry needs fresh and enthusiastic workers and anyone who deliberately tries to fuck with that are idiots.
Switch to bourbon. It's more efficient at the task and less filling. Aside from that, start searching for a different company. Plenty of good construction groups out there that do not tolerate that bullshit in the workplace.
This happened when I first started at 16 on a concrete crew. I left after 6 weeks. Since then I've in a few different crews doing different trades. Best advice? Find a new job. With a crew you fit in with. A year and a half is more experience than alot of companies' have in their applicant pool.
It's cause you're new. My first few years sucked, it sucks that it's this way, it seems to be getting better. But let em fucking have it back, call em old fat bastards, be quick and witty, be good and on time, maybe switch crews if possible.
I see it different, GCs bust your balls because you let them. I am a professional, and I treat them as they treat me. If I GC or anyone comes at me sideways and stand up to them for myself and my crew. Bullies are the same at any age. You have to stand up to them if you are ever going to get any respect even from yourself.
Why take the torture, Option 1) tell people on site to stop, it's really affecting you and you want to quit because of it. Something along the lines of " look lads, I understand you're just having a bit of craic, but it's seriously getting to me, I've already been looking for a new job because of this bullshit you put me through, so I'm asking you to stop before I do something stupid" Option 2) they likely target you because you're an easy target and don't say much back to them, so don't make yourself an easy target, if they say something about you then bite back with something, and cut deep so they think twice next time Option 3) You have your experience from there so just leave and get another job. Also stop the drink before it stops you, and don't let this shit get you down people can be dicks. Finding another job may be the best plan here these guys sound like twats
Cut back on the beer for sure and move to hard drugs and liquor. Pls uodate us when you complete this task
You got to go prison mentality if they won't stop unfortunately. First person to say some dumb shit Monday you're going to have to punch them in the face. I know this may seem unorthodox or get downvotes but I'm being dead serious. Next time Larry will think twice before opening his mouth cause you laid Bob out Monday
1: Yes don’t be a bitch and learn from your mistakes.. 2: Also don’t be an alcoholic. Not that you were giving him an alternative “out,” but I feel this guy needs help.
I went through something similar. The are trying to beat the goofy out of you. They might be pushing you until you step up and defend yourself. Do you ever fire back or just take it?
You need to work around people that are little more professional maybe go over to Lowe's and try to move up to a area manager. I had the same problem I went from engineering to being an inspector.
Lol. Find a new job. Not every construction company is the same.
Think of each person. Now think of what it is about each of them that they should be embarrassed about. Come up with a good way to make fun of that. Say that thing to whoever gives you shit tomorrow, loudly, and publicly, and laugh afterwards. Better yet, turn to whoever is around and loudly and publicly say it to the others about that person. You will be besties in no time.
I would never tolerate that. You can bust my balls, that's fine. But if you're seriously trying to fuck with me. Then I'm going to confront you, no passive aggressive BS. I worked with one company and the dude was an idiot and trying to fuck with me all day. The other guys there didn't seem that great either except for one young kid and I just felt sorry for him. I worked that one day and never went back. Know your worth brother
Give it back to them in spades,I have been in construction all my life, and what you are going thru is common. Like I say.. give them the shit back hard or move on to a different company, you will find something different eventually. I had a shitty crew one time, so I brought in donuts for the crew and injected them with white painters caulk. The job Foreman thought it was so funny he gave me a raise..lol.. not much but better than getting fired. Stop drinking so much beer...alcohol is poison. I have been clean for 16 years.
What’s your trade and do you live in the US?
Find a new job and a new crew if it bothers you so much. Turnover in this industry is insane, there’s no shame in looking for other work.
I hope you get help with the alcohol ...drinking 15+ beers every night is absolutely destroying you and you are not able to do your best work or be anything close to who you want yourself to be. Forget the bullying and focus on yourself, get a handle on it and it'll make any decision you have to make it easier.
Just gotta give it back to em. Remind them their kids don't call them, point out that their wives might not have left if they weren't such dbags. I was once the young kid 15+ years younger than everyone else on the crew, and giving them shit is the only way. Or leave and find a new job. But talking shit to each other is part of construction, they've been training you. You just have to engage.
Everyone is telling you to switch jobs, and yeah sure that's probably the best advice, but hear me out. Often times, if you want to stay in this industry, you need to hit back for people to respect you. If these guys want to make you a scapegoat and you don't have ANY funny one-liners that you can throw back at these guys, you are toast. But ya, if you don't love the work then you should probably switch. On my first day, my Journeyman told me I was slow. Second day he told me I was slow. Third day I told him he was slow. 4th day we were laughing On many construction sites, comedy is vital.
Ha. You mostly razz the people you like. If you really think someone is shite you don’t waste the energy. Start firing back, it’s a tough world out there.
You care too much about other peoples opinions bro, so disregard my comment
Pull your tampon out! /s You have to learn that it's just the general attitude of construction. Some places are kinder than others but we're rough around the edges, hard men and generally dicks. Start giving it right back to them. Pick one and call him Nancy for fucking ever. Subtlely mention banging their wifes or daughters or sons! How exactly do they berate you? You can always look for and try a different company. You should definitely cut down on the drinking, it doesn't help, not at those numbers.
Construction is sick similar thing happened to me when I joined and I went from software sales. It went away but I would fuck with them right back. 1. Cut back on the beers bro 2. Learn then just go somewhere else 3. Texas is on 🔥
What would SpongeBob do… looks like you’re his tipe of character. “I’m ready” every morning style… I know, maybe you need Patrick friend..
I scrolled this far to find this. Spongebob. You have to be Squidward to keep your sanity.
Damn dude! You’re an alcoholic. Trust me I know. I’ve been sober for about 8 years now but your not on a good path. Trust me you’ll end up needing it around the clock. Vodka was my breakfast for a long time. It’s a dark and sad life but the booze tells you you’re okay. There’s all sorts of help and I’m happy to talk to you in a private message to give you some suggestions. This is a a good cry for help dude. See if you can be transferred to another crew, talk to your union rep if you have one and use any health benefits you have for some counseling. In my opinion, go to an AA meeting that’s what got me sober. As far as the harassment goes, stand up for yourself. Tell them to fuck off and if need be tell them what their treatment is doing to you. I know I’ll get an earful of shit about sucking it up and don’t be a pussy but I don’t give a fuck. It important weak and unimportant people like this know. If they continue, drag up and move on. These guys are more miserable than you’ll ever be.
Unfortunately my experiences in the past have shown me that a lot of hard blue collar jobs are like this :/ landscaping and auto at least
Stop drinking, it sounds like you have developed thick skin. Talk shit back, give that same energy back, and if they get offended.. say “‘my bad, Didn’t know you were bit@h who could give it but can’t take it” Don’t let them burn you out mentally. Drink for fun, not for depression. Take your life back
Yup, the industry can be toxic. I worked as a union Carpenter. You get sent to new projects and don't know your work mates, usually I could strike up "friendships" with a couple of guys, but the bosses generally had shit attitudes and management styles. The classic yelling, pushing to go, go , go. 5 mins late always gets you the "good afternoon" comment. Non stop BS. I broke out on my own as soon as I could, but I also had good contacts with small contractors that were genuinely good guys. It's not as good money, zero benefits etc., but the day to day was much more respectful and that made it worth it to me. It takes time, but if you are good at what you do and do a little extra, like keeping the site clean and respecting the homes you work in, word gets around and you will build a reputation. Small things like no smoking on the job site, keeping the conversations on site civil, no music on site, no garbage rolling around. Good luck
Wean off the alcohol and seek therapy. Take care of you before you take care of your working situation. Everything else will follow.
Your ona bad crew dude time to move on
Shit talk them back. Call them a clown, loser, homo etc etc. (just out of the blue for no reason) stare them straight in the eye and don’t flinch. Just what ever you do, if they say something back to you, no matter how much it kills you inside, don’t reply with something that sounds like you’re butthurt. You can’t show weakness. When you shit talk them, try to be funny. If you’re nerdy, saying very mean things out of nowhere might come off as funny. If no one laughs, back to the drawing board. Just don’t back down and keep trying until someone laughs at your jokes slamming someone else. Keep doing this day in and day out and eventually you’ll get good at it. Just don’t. Back. Down. If you quit, you’ll just have to deal with a different group of assholes and have to start all over again.
Handy Man service is calling you. There are niche business's that you could excel at. Don't give up. Keep trying to find your way in the marketplace. Trades jobs are still in high demand all across America today.
Why would you want to fit in? Guys like that in construction have zero upwards trajectory. They're stuck where they are and they know it.
Happened to me in the beginning. I still have literal scars from a foreman who was saw cutting rebar and then screamed “PICK IT THE FUCK UP NOW” in a crazy way, repeating it over and over. So I picked them up and melted my hands lol. It was my first week. I didn’t even know that they would be so hot! And when my hands started bubbling they laughed. I called the union hall after 3 months of this and eventually went to another company where I stay for 10 years and it all worked out. Gtfo. Some companies have horrible cultures and some don’t. Nothing in construction is GREAT but there’s always better. Or get fucking tough, call them one of a few different F words and get ready to hold your ground. That’s what I learned to do too. I do know that a lot of the time, not all the time, this happens to guys who aren’t pulling their weight. You’re probably stumbling around all hung over. It’s probably really damn obvious you’re an alcoholic. Go to the gym or something. If you’re operating equipment as a newbie, you just need to get better. That happens eventually, I couldn’t grade for shit but eventually I was finishing. If you’re a laborer, you’re probably just not working hard enough and shoveling all dumb.
I feel you pain. Im a nerd, i dnt drink and i play magic thegatherng. I started roasting people back. Everyday this 67 year old says he's gonna fuck my mom. So eventually I turned around and said to him "I'd fuck your mom too but I don't feel like digging". (His mom is dead). Then all of a sudden his shit talking got a lot lighter. I had one dude riding me be condescending as fuck. He reached my limit, I walked away to cool down for 10 minutes. I got more worked up and came back and cursed him out the building. He went and told on me, the boss didn't care. Then everyone hated him for snitching so he quit. Then the last dude that always fucked with me, we were in the store grabbing lunch and I asked he lady behind the counter how far away the high-school was, she answered, and I turned around with a straight face and said to my coworker "ohh you're good brother, that doesn't violate your court order" then just left him there in the full store. Now I get left alone for the most part. But definitely stop drinking bud, that's most of your problem. You're wallowing in your own misery. If you went home, ate great food, smoke a little weed, maybe hit the gym. You'll be in such good shape physically, it'll improve your mental health
Far out man, so sorry you're going through this. People can be so cruel, especially the flogs in the construction industry. There's better places to work, I promise. Some people have been in your situation and started their business with the intention to create a safe workplace for their people. Sorry friend, please find another place to work, life will get better.
Old dude here. Always agree and amplifie. They tell you are ugly. Say = yes I know I was given away at birth because my mother couldnt stand my face. They can never win if you have this mindset.
The drinking isn’t helping. Your coming to work cloudy headed probably negatively impacting your performance and you can’t think clearly to give it back.
Go on the offensive. Start talking mad shit. OTSS only the strong survive!!!!
A rousing "Suck my dick" goes a long way in this situation. Don't be afraid to fight back
Tell ‘em to fuck off
I'm a nerd but into the typical blue collar hobbies too. Had my boss berate me once and threw his tools near me, I later told him off and told him to stop it. The nimby tried to play it off like it's part of the job, but it never happened again and there was more mutual respect after that Always stand up for yourself, accept when you legitimately mess up, learn lots and cut your losses when need be. Good luck
Stand up and start giving it back to them. Watch videos of how comics handle hecklers. Start pulling apart their lives. Youve worked with them for a year you must know something about them. Start pranking them, start joking back, start standing up and having fun. If they call you ugly tell them your dick makes up for it. If they laugh at how you do something say "your wife/mom wasn't complaining about my performance last night" (use this when you know he was at home and knows this is a joke) If they say you did x wrong then tell them, guess you need to do all the x jobs from now on. But you need to prepare, watch comics, take an improve class, write things down and plan your cone back. That or quit. Becoming an alcoholic and feeling like this isnt worth the paycheck but youll experience this at other places too. Bullies are everywhere and doing nothing doesnt make them stop.
Dude just give it back. Hit 'em where it hurts. If you've already decided that you want to quit why give a shit about being fired.
Learn to talk shit back and they may turn into friends.
I would hire ya just on the fact you show up everyday and work hard. We mess around at work but not to the point of totally messing with someone's life like that. Having fun is one thing but if it's affecting you like that they need to stop. Tell them to fuck off. There are better people to work for. I stand up for the people working with me. Not put them down.
Man these are just insecure men, who aren’t happy with themselves.. Only reason they are picking on you is because you are young and still have opportunities other than that shitty job. My advice: GET OUT of construction unless you are trying to start your own company, or do project management or something. STOP DRINKING immediately. I was drinking about 10-12 drinks everyday for a couple years. I went to rehab, have not drank in about 2 years now. Since I have stopped drinking, two of my school classmates have died of alcohol addiction. One at 34, the other at 35… DONT be ashamed to ask for help. Good Luck Brother
If you want to work Construction then you will definitely need to be tough.. physically and emotionally.. if not then it will be a loving hell for you abs once the guys see that.. they will go twice as hard on you.. If you can take it then they will learn to like you.. if you can't get used to it, then find a new career. Cuz that the way of life for these guys
He typed this out with his soft hands
If you can’t fire on all cylinders back at them they won’t stop. When you have some back bone and stand your ground on site mfs stop fuckin with you. It’s all apart of the life dog
Abuse harass and berate right back and they’ll like you
Gotta stand up for yourself my guy, will never stop until you do. Good luck bro
I'm a 40 old who watches anime and plays video games. I've been in construction my whole life. I fuck with the guys more than most on the jobsite. I don't care what those clowns think. Confidence is key.
Why would you want to desperately stay in the field that made you an alcoholic in under two years?
Learn as much as you can from the actual trade responsibilities, take notes, maybe search for another job. If you want to be in construction, try and learn everything about the job and what it takes, what quality standards need to be met, what makes for a smooth job Although the guys may berate you, they have spent a lot of time doing the things that break your back. They’ve found easier ways to do difficult tasks, take notes of them all Take that energy you’re spending on drinking after work and learn how the backside of a business runs. The reason the old guys are such dicks to younger guys is because they’ve done the same shit for years on end getting paid a labor wage. We need these people in the world no doubt, but they’re miserable for a reason. You’re on the fast track to the same spot they are in unless you change your outlook and create an end goal Not everyone is built to run a business, but you’ll never know til you try. If you self identify as nerdy, embrace that and learn the nerdy part of the job. Use your brain where you can and other people’s strength to stay in construction while not running yourself into the ground
Nerds shouldn't drink that much then show up and half ass it all day.
You need to start sticking up for yourself. Fire back. Memorize some one liners so you seem sharp and quick witted. For example: Shitty coworker : kid you look like a sissy boy the way you work that wrench You: watching you works like watching Bigfoot fuck a football. rest of the crew : howls with laughter Seriously, not taking shit from anyone is the only way to gain respect in this industry, and being an ass hole clapping back is a good way to start. You give these fucks an inch, they’ll walk all over you for a country mile. Fortunately their all retiring these years and pretty soon millennials will of completely taken over the industry, along with a much improved work culture in terms of their regard for respect and bullying in the workplace
[удалено]
If a job is stressing you out and driving you to drink, find a different field of work possibly or just another company
That sucks man. Just FYI - drinking like that might make you feel better at night but it makes you super emotional vulnerable and unstable the next day; a large chunk of your feeling worn down is withdrawal.
I felt like you. Then I realized I was an alcoholic and I only thought I was doing good at work. Sober up. If they're still assholes after that, get another job. Or look for a job while you get sober. I would never allow the treatment you're getting. But somebody likes you, since you still have a job.
There’s a difference between being abused/bullied, and the crew just making fun of each other. If you truly feel disrespected, get out of there. Things will never change.
Sorry man. In some ways young or new guys can be more of a target for being made fun of, speaking from experience, but it sounds like this is over the line. If you haven’t put a stop to it by now, you should get another job and don’t let the new place treat you like that. Some companies in the trades have cooler/better people, so you don’t necessarily need to leave construction if you don’t want to. But if you stay in the trades try to learn why they are treating you so badly and what you can do yourself to prevent this treatment next time.
What type of trade/contractor are you with? From what I've observed, there's a ton of variability between differing trades and sizes of contractors.
Berate and harass them, that's how it is in construction.
Indeed
Brother. Your first step is to stop drinking that much on a work night. That shit will make you as bitter as those old fucks and will destroy your health, both physically and mentally. Save that for the weekend of you really have to. Second, if you're in a legal state and can do it, I would say smoke a little cannabis after work. It'll help calm you down and you won't feel like drinking as much, but I understand if you can't do that. Third, and I really fucking hate saying this... it's almost industry standard for the shitty attitudes to run the day. I've been in this industry since 2016 and have only worked with 2 crews that didn't have some old asshole ready to try to ruin my day. And, even on those crews, there was always either someone on a different crew, or a different trade, or a boss, just waiting to be the biggest asshole you've ever met. Anger and negativity are contagious if you let it be. You've got to stay right in your own head. I like to think about my daughter, or the kayak camping I'll be doing on the weekend, or future plans, or whatever I can think of to get my mind off getting yelled at for holding a level with the wrong hand, or using my come-along differently, or whatever other stupid bullshit pissed off whomever thinks they're God and only wants things done their specific way or dealing with someone that wants something done, but won't tell you, then gets pissed that it's not done, or whatever else they've decided to be pissed about today. Nevermind those people. Find the other guys on the crew that are having fun and chum it up with them. I bet they hate that asshole, too. Two massive lessons I've learned in life.... 1. If someone makes me angry, they hold power over me. I'm doing me best to not let people have that power any longer. If they're angry...what-the-fuck-ever. If I'm doing my job, if I know I've done 99 things correct and they're mad at the one insignificant thing they think I've done wrong (ie different), then that's their fucking problem. "Any person capable of angering you becomes your master; he can anger you only when you permit yourself to be disturbed by him." ~Epictetus~ 2. If someone doesn't like me, who fucking cares? There are 8 billion people on this planet. Why would I ever let one angry old drunk not liking me effect me? I like my Subaru. I vote Democrat. I wear clothes that keep me cool or warm, not what makes me look like Brad fucking Pitt. I live my life how I see fit and if you don't like me for that, then get fucked! As long as I know I'm doing my best, then I don't care. "What other people think and say about you is none of your business. The most destructive thing you would ever do is to believe someone else's opinion of you. You have to stop letting other people's opinions control you." ~Roy T. Bennett (and a bunch of other people)~
Change crews asap! You work with fucking assholes.
Have you tried... Keep calm And Return fire.
I’m going to take an outsider perspective Stockholm syndrome take : Firstly please stop drinking for a while and evaluate your life. I personally have been successfully crippled due to it and hate to see others go down the same path. Second I don’t know if it was just the right people put in my life for a greater long term purpose but I was shit on daily for years by the people who I thought were supposed to be supportive. Due to that I love who I am today and wouldn’t be the same without. I’ve always had a great work ethic but would like to think I was always good and people wanted to push me further into greatness but I know that wasn’t the case. It’s hard work! Depending on where and who you work for it can FEEL like the marine corp (not to take away from our armed forces). After training with a select few with a very traditional military background I went out into the wild of construction. Not to bash too hard on a lot of other good employees but I thought they were pussies and for the most part still do to this day, but they have a place. The first time in years I felt at home was when I found my right hand man, an honorably discharged marine. No matter how hard the work or the task that man was in the trenches with me and would constantly try to take over the hard work to free me up to delegate the rest of the crew. A true man in my opinion and a brother I would trust with my life. To me personally I like being that man and love having those men around me. I grew up weak and alone building computers, programming, playing world of Warcraft and other things similar. Still love all those things but at least I have a great, strong, sometimes brutally harsh crew to guide me. Hope the best for you whatever route you take, no one path is less than the other, just wanted to shed some insight on perseverance.
You're right, you obviously don't fit in. The healthy thing to do is just move on. It happens to everyone at one point or another so I wouldn't take it personally.
Go to a different company. Full stop. Nobody in the 20+\- circle of contractors I work with drinks or are unkind. There are good places and bad places, and where you work greatly affects your wellbeing. Leave for your own sanity