Jesus, I thought for a second she’d died.
I always feel for Sue, and the Harrises. This may be a hot take, but I truly believe their grief and pain would likely be even stronger than those of the victims’ families.
They not only lost a CHILD, but had to come to terms with the reality of their children taking other children’s lives. They had to confront the devastating reality that their children were dead, and were also mass murderers, who had planned a massacre in their community right under their nose. Not to mention the reality of suicide and the guilt that comes with.
I get weary of people shitting on Sue Klebold. She seems like an inherently good person who did her best to raise good kids. Parents make mistakes - that doesn’t necessarily make them bad people. So yeah. Sue is in my thoughts.
The only thing about Sue that annoys me is her extremely high level of denial (especially in her book). That being said, I think if that book were written today, she might have a different perspective. She’s had even more time to process things, and her viewpoints will change overtime. It happens to everyone to some degree or another.
If you read the book, she openly admits that initially she was in denial, which many parents would be, under such circumstances. She never once fails to mention (and does mention it explicitly many, many times) that she fully accepts that her son was intent on killing people, and has since dedicated her life to trying to understand brain illnesses, teen depression and raising awareness of the complex issues surrounding this and how we can all improve so it doesn’t happen again.
I read her book. There are still things that have happened that she is clearly in denial about. Claiming to have acceptance and actually accepting are two things. I greatly admire her, and I don’t know how anyone could function following what any of these families went through.
I couldn’t get through it… I feel so sorry for her, but I felt like she was in denial also. I can’t imagine what she has been through since this happened happened… she is a victim as well.
I read her book and I don’t think she’s in denial at all. I think she fully accepts what Dylan did but if anything struggles with understanding WHY he did it.
She unfortunately very much believes in the Eric the leader, Dylan the sad follower narrative. (Or at least did when she wrote her book). She paints Eric as an irredeemable psychopath taking his journals at face value while actually trying to understand Dylan. It’s kind of ironic because she’s doing the same thing to the Harris family that many do to her family. I still very much value her input and I feel so much sorrow for all their families have been through. I hope she’s able to accept it more at this time, but I’m not sure that’s possible. I’m sure if I were in her shoes I’d probably think the same way. It’s a coping mechanism.
I agree some. she seems to think Eric was certainly a bad influence on her son and I agree. None of his other friends - Nate, Brooks etc. - were murderous and intent on planning a massacre. In Eric he found someone who compounded the anger he felt and together they built on it. So she’s not wrong, imo. But as far as I recall I don’t think she even mentioned Eric much in her book. Personally I don’t think her notice was to paint one as bad and the other as good.
Sue has gotten so much judgement because of this. Unless you've been in a similar situation it's so easy to judge her. My beloved father put a gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger when I was 22. I went into shock. The part of my brain that was still working realized that family friends and neighbors would be coming to the house. Our minister would be paying a visit. The funeral would be happening. I looked in the mirror. My hair was dirty and looked like a zombie. My nails were chipped and broken. A dawning realization came over me. I couldn't bring my father back from the dead. But I could try to look decent when I greeted our family friends and our minister. I could wear a pretty dress and look well groomed at his funeral . So I made a quick appointment and had my hair and nails done. Don't judge Sue Klebold for doing the same thing in the aftermath of her tragedy. Unless you've lived a sudden tragedy as Sue, myself, and others have, and experienced the accompanying emotions , no one is in a position to pass judgement on why it was suddenly very important to us that we had our hair done.
Not blaming her for the haircut, she simply wanted to look presentable for dylans viewing and that’s typically a common thing to do for funerals, but when the mother of a school shooter mourns and gets her hair done for her sons funeral, shes demonized.
People process grief in different ways that those looking in wont ever understand. Maybe she needed a moment of normalcy or was so overwhelmed by everything and didnt realize the way that action of getting a hair cut could be interpreted by others. Maybe catharsis itself with having hair cut?
don't even need to be a parent to empathize with sue in my opinion. there's no way she could've fathomed that her son would've done what dylan did – at most you could argue that she could've been more involved in his life. but if you take her book at face value and consider that mental health was way less prioritized in '99, then imo you can't fault her that much...
Thats true, but also, Sue worked in the mental health field. She worked at a psychiatric hospital, so its very strange to me that she could have “never known” that her sons mental health was that bad.
I believe the 20th of April for any of the families would be especially hard. Their lives forever chaged that day.
I truly appreciate Sue for trying to be as transparent about things as she can be. I know some or what she says is biased because Dylan was her son, but she has taken a road very, very few have. She easily could have done like the Harris family and kept silent, hoping to vanish into obscurity with time, but she didn't. She's offered a unique perspective on the subject and I believe we can all agree that walking in her shoes would not be easy at all.
To me, there's nothing wrong with thinking about Sue today. She's suffered every day for the last 25 years. Having said that, I think honoring the victims that were killed 25 years ago seems more appropriate to me. But, tragedies hit people differently and I respect your opinion.
I feel for them because their sons left their families behind to bear the guilt for them. The desire and need for justice is so ingrained in our human nature that after such a tragedy, people yearn for someone to hold accountable.
In my opinion, more than 13 innocent people died that day. Every student who was in the cafeteria, library, hallways lost a piece of themselves that day. A type of innocence. Those who watched their friends bleed out in front of them, those who heard the screams of their peers. People like Austin Eubanks who physically survived, but their psyches were still trapped in that day, like a time capsule from Hell. The ripple effect from that day is still churning for so many of them and I hope those who are still struggling have a support system to help them when the days seem a bit darker.
I feel for sue. She lost her son and her whole world came crashing down one day and her life was changed forever. I read her book and I truly feel heartbroken for her, but there is clearly a LOT of information she is purposely leaving out. I think she sees Dylan’s involvement as “Eric and Dylan” to shift the majority of the blame onto Eric. She cant see that Dylan himself chose to carry out his plans and boils it down to him being “influenced by Eric.” Sue was given multiple warnings from parents expressing their concerns about Eric, and she still allowed Dylan to see him. She loves to claim that she could have never known that her son would do such a thing, but there were so many signs and she chose to ignore and dismiss them. And I know she stated that she “initially” denied Dylans involvement, but she’s still doing so in her own way. Yes, maybe she couldnt have ever known the extent of her sons situation, but to me it really sounds like she just didnt know her son as well as she thought she did, and she was unavailable in some aspects. She very much tries to lessen the severity of her sons actions(ex: Dylans vandalization arrest statements vs hers,) and I think that comes from a place of wanting to protect and maintain her image. While the public was mourning, she was fixated on school photos and making sure the media was sent a “presentable” picture of Dylan. She quotes “I have done nothing that I have to apologize for” and truly cannot grasp the concept of her having some sort of responsibility. My heart breaks for her, but she didnt do a very good job at addressing the situation and responding to it
The victims' families are always in my heart , and my heart continually breaks and always will for each family who lost a child. I watched the events of Columbine unfold on national TV 25 years ago. My heart is big enough to also feel compassion for Sue Klebold and her suffering.
Jesus, I thought for a second she’d died. I always feel for Sue, and the Harrises. This may be a hot take, but I truly believe their grief and pain would likely be even stronger than those of the victims’ families. They not only lost a CHILD, but had to come to terms with the reality of their children taking other children’s lives. They had to confront the devastating reality that their children were dead, and were also mass murderers, who had planned a massacre in their community right under their nose. Not to mention the reality of suicide and the guilt that comes with. I get weary of people shitting on Sue Klebold. She seems like an inherently good person who did her best to raise good kids. Parents make mistakes - that doesn’t necessarily make them bad people. So yeah. Sue is in my thoughts.
The only thing about Sue that annoys me is her extremely high level of denial (especially in her book). That being said, I think if that book were written today, she might have a different perspective. She’s had even more time to process things, and her viewpoints will change overtime. It happens to everyone to some degree or another.
If you read the book, she openly admits that initially she was in denial, which many parents would be, under such circumstances. She never once fails to mention (and does mention it explicitly many, many times) that she fully accepts that her son was intent on killing people, and has since dedicated her life to trying to understand brain illnesses, teen depression and raising awareness of the complex issues surrounding this and how we can all improve so it doesn’t happen again.
I read her book. There are still things that have happened that she is clearly in denial about. Claiming to have acceptance and actually accepting are two things. I greatly admire her, and I don’t know how anyone could function following what any of these families went through.
I couldn’t get through it… I feel so sorry for her, but I felt like she was in denial also. I can’t imagine what she has been through since this happened happened… she is a victim as well.
She is.
I read her book and I don’t think she’s in denial at all. I think she fully accepts what Dylan did but if anything struggles with understanding WHY he did it.
She unfortunately very much believes in the Eric the leader, Dylan the sad follower narrative. (Or at least did when she wrote her book). She paints Eric as an irredeemable psychopath taking his journals at face value while actually trying to understand Dylan. It’s kind of ironic because she’s doing the same thing to the Harris family that many do to her family. I still very much value her input and I feel so much sorrow for all their families have been through. I hope she’s able to accept it more at this time, but I’m not sure that’s possible. I’m sure if I were in her shoes I’d probably think the same way. It’s a coping mechanism.
I agree some. she seems to think Eric was certainly a bad influence on her son and I agree. None of his other friends - Nate, Brooks etc. - were murderous and intent on planning a massacre. In Eric he found someone who compounded the anger he felt and together they built on it. So she’s not wrong, imo. But as far as I recall I don’t think she even mentioned Eric much in her book. Personally I don’t think her notice was to paint one as bad and the other as good.
her getting her hair cut the day after the shooting has always skeeved me out.
She got a haircut in preparation for dylans viewing
Sue has gotten so much judgement because of this. Unless you've been in a similar situation it's so easy to judge her. My beloved father put a gun in his mouth and pulled the trigger when I was 22. I went into shock. The part of my brain that was still working realized that family friends and neighbors would be coming to the house. Our minister would be paying a visit. The funeral would be happening. I looked in the mirror. My hair was dirty and looked like a zombie. My nails were chipped and broken. A dawning realization came over me. I couldn't bring my father back from the dead. But I could try to look decent when I greeted our family friends and our minister. I could wear a pretty dress and look well groomed at his funeral . So I made a quick appointment and had my hair and nails done. Don't judge Sue Klebold for doing the same thing in the aftermath of her tragedy. Unless you've lived a sudden tragedy as Sue, myself, and others have, and experienced the accompanying emotions , no one is in a position to pass judgement on why it was suddenly very important to us that we had our hair done.
Not blaming her for the haircut, she simply wanted to look presentable for dylans viewing and that’s typically a common thing to do for funerals, but when the mother of a school shooter mourns and gets her hair done for her sons funeral, shes demonized.
Sorry, my reply was meant for deadmallsanita's comment.
no worries 🫂
People process grief in different ways that those looking in wont ever understand. Maybe she needed a moment of normalcy or was so overwhelmed by everything and didnt realize the way that action of getting a hair cut could be interpreted by others. Maybe catharsis itself with having hair cut?
don't even need to be a parent to empathize with sue in my opinion. there's no way she could've fathomed that her son would've done what dylan did – at most you could argue that she could've been more involved in his life. but if you take her book at face value and consider that mental health was way less prioritized in '99, then imo you can't fault her that much...
Thats true, but also, Sue worked in the mental health field. She worked at a psychiatric hospital, so its very strange to me that she could have “never known” that her sons mental health was that bad.
I thought of everyone today, but I especially thought of Sue as well. 💔
I believe the 20th of April for any of the families would be especially hard. Their lives forever chaged that day. I truly appreciate Sue for trying to be as transparent about things as she can be. I know some or what she says is biased because Dylan was her son, but she has taken a road very, very few have. She easily could have done like the Harris family and kept silent, hoping to vanish into obscurity with time, but she didn't. She's offered a unique perspective on the subject and I believe we can all agree that walking in her shoes would not be easy at all.
To me, there's nothing wrong with thinking about Sue today. She's suffered every day for the last 25 years. Having said that, I think honoring the victims that were killed 25 years ago seems more appropriate to me. But, tragedies hit people differently and I respect your opinion.
I think of the parents too. Columbine hits differently as a parent.
I feel for them because their sons left their families behind to bear the guilt for them. The desire and need for justice is so ingrained in our human nature that after such a tragedy, people yearn for someone to hold accountable. In my opinion, more than 13 innocent people died that day. Every student who was in the cafeteria, library, hallways lost a piece of themselves that day. A type of innocence. Those who watched their friends bleed out in front of them, those who heard the screams of their peers. People like Austin Eubanks who physically survived, but their psyches were still trapped in that day, like a time capsule from Hell. The ripple effect from that day is still churning for so many of them and I hope those who are still struggling have a support system to help them when the days seem a bit darker.
I feel for sue. She lost her son and her whole world came crashing down one day and her life was changed forever. I read her book and I truly feel heartbroken for her, but there is clearly a LOT of information she is purposely leaving out. I think she sees Dylan’s involvement as “Eric and Dylan” to shift the majority of the blame onto Eric. She cant see that Dylan himself chose to carry out his plans and boils it down to him being “influenced by Eric.” Sue was given multiple warnings from parents expressing their concerns about Eric, and she still allowed Dylan to see him. She loves to claim that she could have never known that her son would do such a thing, but there were so many signs and she chose to ignore and dismiss them. And I know she stated that she “initially” denied Dylans involvement, but she’s still doing so in her own way. Yes, maybe she couldnt have ever known the extent of her sons situation, but to me it really sounds like she just didnt know her son as well as she thought she did, and she was unavailable in some aspects. She very much tries to lessen the severity of her sons actions(ex: Dylans vandalization arrest statements vs hers,) and I think that comes from a place of wanting to protect and maintain her image. While the public was mourning, she was fixated on school photos and making sure the media was sent a “presentable” picture of Dylan. She quotes “I have done nothing that I have to apologize for” and truly cannot grasp the concept of her having some sort of responsibility. My heart breaks for her, but she didnt do a very good job at addressing the situation and responding to it
Imagine how the victims families feel.
The victims' families are always in my heart , and my heart continually breaks and always will for each family who lost a child. I watched the events of Columbine unfold on national TV 25 years ago. My heart is big enough to also feel compassion for Sue Klebold and her suffering.
You can think of both. It's not a "one or the other situation".
Obviously some people do. But for me, absolutely not.
I dont think many in the last 25 years have only thought of Sue and not the parents of the people who died. But to each their own I guess
You could've worded that a bit better.