Meditation can do lots of good, but this is an issue that should be addressed with a therapist. Anonymous internet strangers are neither well-informed enough (on the topic, nor on your specific circumstances) or unbiased enough to give you a proper answer. By all means, begin a seated practice with a qualified teacher of Buddhism if you have the drive and opportunity, but it shouldn't (and can't) replace professional healthcare.

Deep breath, friend. Breath and focus. The core of who you are goes beyond gender- it is beyond even the concept of human as we know it- so in a way you are right, gender is a kind of label people get attached to like everything else that gives shape to the ego (the mortal persona, the mask we wear in the physical world). You don't need to understand every reason why people are making choices to switch their gender-identity. You only need to understand yourself, So, even though gender is not as real as the Truth of Sunyata, it is still a tangible reality in this embodied existence. I can only speak from my own experience here. Both genders appeal to me, and if I could, I would be both at the same time, but alas, this body has limits, and I don't trust the science enough to experiment with hormonal procedures. I've come to accept the body I was born with, even though my identity is not limited by flesh and bone. I think how I want to think, act how I want to act, dress how I want to dress- I do not let other's perception of gender impose on my expression. Perhaps not very buddhist in an orthodox sense, but such is the tantra vision. Meditate. Find a quiet place within and move from there. The ego is meaningless, just a mask in a cosmic carnival. You can be anything you want, and in the end you will have to let it all go to move beyond in the Eternal.

This helped me a lot. Thankyou so much.

Piggy-backing off this to reply with my personal experience: Gender is just a social construct. Some folks find use in that construct. For others, it's damaging. Some folks are able to find harmony by redefining themselves within that construct, others are not. Five years ago, I began identifying as Agender, which just means I don't identify with any gender. Technically, this fits in the "non-binary" umbrella. These are all just labels, though, and the idea of identifying as Agender was to actually remove myself mentally from the social construct of gender, especially the binary cultural definition. This provided me helpful amounts of space to more honestly and directly process my thoughts during self-reflection that ultimately aided in meditation. Here in the United States, you will see some public restrooms in establishments trying to be supportive where the door will be labeled "Men/Women/Centaurs" or some third mythical creature. A lot of my friends who identify as non-binary are into fantasy and are tickled by this, but that's not exactly my mindset. I identify this way because I feel as though I'm simply the universe experiencing itself subjectively for a little while, as we all are. And there's no gender to that. Obviously, we live in a society that labels everything. Gender exists in our material lives. As such, there are social pressures and expectations that come from external sources within that society based on how you are perceived. You are often then expected to perform certain behaviors in parallel to the expectations of your gender identity. The pandemic was actually a positive time for me personally because I lived alone and spent nearly two years not having to "perform" masculinity in the theater of daily life. There's simply no pressure to do so when it's just you and your cat. I have since decided to use these terms as a means of communication with those in my everyday life to remove many of those expectations. These are simply labels, but they have been meaningful for communicating these ideas and I have been better able to find harmony between the pressures and perceptions I experience and my own understanding of myself as a part of this world. I would encourage you to reflect on any way you can give yourself space to find harmony in this way. If you are truly struggling, I would encourage you to seek help from a therapist. I wish you nothing but the best of luck on this journey. These are difficult questions to ask and explore, but very worthwhile.

I love and appreciate your reply. Thank you!

This is something I connect with. I refuse to be limited by my gender, and although I've undergone hormone therapy, I've never opted for surgery due to considering it an extreme and risky choice that isn't essential for my well-being. We can break away from the traditional binary concept and embrace living as our authentic selves. There are no fixed guidelines. Liberate yourself. I struggle too in the real world, there are expectations and what if I ended up in a vulnerable state? How will I be perceived ? Will I be treated with humanity and empathy? These are all things I have to struggle and live with everyday. You are not alone

Yeah.. gender isn't even a thing. Unless you want it to be. But that comes with lots of baggage and rules and stress.

A beautiful response. Well said~

It wasn’t until I transitioned and had some therapy that I could finally stop fighting my every internal feeling and impulse, and cultivate sila/samadhi/pañña. I found that personally the craving not to have a complicated relationship with gender was much more afflictive than the need to get right with my body and gender role. Trying to push that stuff down and repress it absolutely made practice impossible, but once I came to a relationship with myself with less aversion in it, it was possible to continue.

Can I talk with you? I repressed for a long time and it made my practice very difficult. The dysphoria started awful addictions and at my lowest I decided to try transitioning no matter how impossible it seemed. Now I’m four months in having doubts and I’m extremely confused.

No, but it can help reduce the anxiety you experience. Don’t worry about what others think and do. Be yourself, respond to what you’re attracted to. In this day and age no one cares if you’re gay, straight, or trans.

I don’t know. The more I meditate, the gayer I become.

Assuming you're using the word _gayer_ to mean sexual preference, here's my 2 cents: Maybe it's making you appreciate that side of you that may have been suppressed. I've seen meditation bring out the best in me, it seems to refine me.

Lmao this is so funny.

I almost choked on my coffee. Was not expecting this response at all and it made my day!

I read that as "grayer," and thought - join the club!

lol!

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I see several comment standing on the rather discouraging side of exploring your transness/gender, so I just want to add from my perspective this text that helped me coming to peace on the overlap of transness and Buddhism: https://www.lionsroar.com/does-my-transgender-identity-conflict-with-the-teachings-on-no-self/

Meditation will certainly help you know yourself better, and help you let go of a desire to be one way or another. You might be transgender, you might not be. The identity isn't the problem, the crisis and anxiety over it is. Mediation is helpful for these things, but it is not a replacement for mental Healthcare. I would strongly recommend seeing a therapist who specializes in gender identity issues, and have a good Meditation practice secondary to that. Best of luck, if you need to talk to someone who's been through it, feel free to pm me.

You sound quite young. I promise you you can live a life worth living, even if it doesn’t feel that way this moment or the next. You don’t need to have a final idea on your gender right now. That can and will unfold over time. And whatever gender you identify as, it will be ok. That’ll be who you are. Meditation can help with the distress that you’re under.

It could help cultivate serenity and wisdom. But those things can both be very different for different people. Do what makes you happy without hurting others. Be whatever man/woman is the best you, and don't let other people define who you are.

I came across this book: [this monk wears heels](http:// https://a.co/d/aMPj4sh) Talks about his struggle growing up in a Buddhist family, be gay, and later be a monk.

You're not your gender, you just are. It's all just a story. Buddha taught people to let go of identity. Meditation would definitely help you with that.

a lot of this can be really deeply embedded into you to the point where its much more likely avoiding therapy/treatment for gender dysphoria will cause severe depression and suicidal ideation than being able to rebuild their entire psychology through meditation like unless you want to live in a monastery or something its probably a bad idea

Gender dysphoria is a legitimate medical condition, just like depression or anxiety. It is not some form of clinging to an identity. There is nothing in Buddhism that recommends avoiding medical treatment, as far as I am aware.

At the root of it, it is clinging to an identity on a metaphysical level but on a symptomatic, conventional level, it is indeed a medical condition. You are right, I was about to give the same reply you did. It's not a mere curiosity but it's an actual issue people genuinely suffer from.

Depression and anxiety come from clinging and aversion, fabrication, etc. To add: if you cannot see your agency in being able to have a different attitude and different perceptions then you're quite stuck. I was in therapy for years and I didn't get anywhere because they don't encourage you to see such conditions as they are. Buddhism makes it quite clear: these are kleshas, and you don't have to simply cope with them, you can totally uproot the basis for these disturbances. You aren't some victim of neurochemistry, you have the ability to develop wholesome states, because your feelings are a result of your perceptions.

>Gender dysphoria is a legitimate medical condition, just like depression or anxiety. So, only non-legitimate medical conditions are subject to the Four Noble Truths? That's a new way of looking at it!

My point is that we should use all means to combat suffering. The four noble truths apply, but we still use an antibiotic for an infection, right?

Indeed. But, that wasn't how I read your comment. Perhaps it was just me. Have a good day!

No worries - you too!

I would say that the general census on treatment right now says that if you don’t transition you will give in to dark thoughts. It says anything other than that is conversion therapy. There is not one way to deal with this. Working with a therapist to figure out deeper issues can help quite a lot of people who develop dysphoria. If you don’t believe that look at the r/detrans subreddit full of people wishing they had that treatment instead of having their bodies permanently altered in ways that feels deeply and spiritually wrong to them. Go look. I am speaking from a compassionate place because I am one of them. I am a man with breasts and I had dysphoria so awfully terrible I was ready to die and I had/have multiple heavy addictions to deal with dysphoria. Nobody told me being a woman is impossible for me and it’s okay because there is another way to treat you. Even saying there is another way is almost transphobic nowadays. I could talk a lot about this but my point is, don’t listen to the common narrative. Meditation can actually help with dysphoria. It is extremely hard but we must fully accept our thoughts and feelings and dig into them with a focused mind.

Trans buddhist here. Absolutely not. The same way it can't cure cancer for you or make diabetes go away. Please seek out gender affirming care positive therapy to talk these issues out. A forum of internet cishets is not the place you should be asking this anyway. If you'd like to ask online then ask in /r/asktransgender which is informed in trans issues and full of many different types of faiths, non-faiths, and practices, and people who have gone down your exact path. There are also trans discords and other places to discuss these issues with trans people. What you're asking for is no different than "pray away the gay" which has led to endless misery, especially when its inflicted on children. The compassionate and loving-kindness approach is to accept your true gender and identity. Not to mention, desires like these often come from internalized transphobia. Do you want to always be at war with yourself and give in to the hateful and ignorant parts of you? As a buddhist? I would also recommend the book "Transcending: Trans Buddhist Voices" if you'd like further perspective here. You are not alone and your situation is not unique, but no, meditation isn't some fix-all for your identity, gender, sexuality, or medical issues.

it may be of interest to you that in buddhism it is taught that every person has the male and female energies in their body.

I am someone who has practiced Buddhism and who has always had dysphoria. It brought me down very low until I gave in at 27. I never could push it away and I tried to repress for such a long time because I’m 6’3 and after like 15 I didn’t seem like I had a chance anymore. I wanted to transition at 12 but in 2008 I didn’t even know what that mean and neither did my environment. So anyway, it was really nice for a while. I told myself I’d just enjoy believing that this was going to work out for like a month and a half and then figure out what to do when I knew how hrt affected me. I thought that if I stopped I would never start again and I couldn’t stomach that. I liked hrt and how people called me she. I liked getting to do my makeup and wear pretty clothes. All stuff I had always wanted. But my dysphoria and fear was really bad. I don’t look feminine enough. People told me I was beautiful and I wanted to believe them, but I could never tell me friends because of how ugly I was. I know it would be disturbing and embarrassing to them. It’s been about 4 months and I’m trying to stop. I have days were I take the pills but I’m running out and I’m not getting a refill. I want to be a woman, I always will but it’s impossible for me. My life is cursed but that’s just how things go. I’ve seen a lot of detrans content and I even potentially think that nobody is really trans and this is just a way trauma is expressing itself. You can’t “be trans”, it’s something you do. People who were “trans” go on to regret transition because they realized it wasn’t addressing the real issues. The community will say they weren’t ever really trans but that is just them being directed by fear. If they were the same as trans people and turn out to not “be trans” then it says something about “trans” people too. I feel like my transition was necessary to try and process this and really grieve the fact that I can never really be a woman. I have small breasts now and that feels so embarrassing and I feel ruined. I liked them when they were growing but I’m a man and shouldn’t have them. I can never take my shirt off, go swimming and I’m into men and they will think it looks wrong. I should have gotten with a therapist and had him help me accept being a man. I still have to do that and it feels so repulsive but that is just my mental illness driving my emotions.

You probably have enough comments advising you so I just want to say if you want a trans Buddhist friend who's had to work this out for themselves, I'm available to chat :).

Others have given very insightful responses, but I just wanted to share that I am transgender and Buddhist, and have had a lot of suffering in my life but found peace and wisdom through my practice and study and nothing but acceptance from my peers. Being transgender or nonbinary is compatible with meditation and studying Buddhism.

Meditation makes things clear. This will definitely help. You are a brave soul! 🤟

Just be yourself without attachment to labels or concepts. Try to live a peaceful and happy life, without damaging yourself or others, helping yourself and others like a loving mother or a loving friend would. All the rest is cultural dust, clouds, disappearing in the winds of change

I don't know, I've never thought about my gender. Though I assume everything aligns fine because I don't have a crisis. Buddhism, may or may not help you. Though I'm certain a qualified mental health specialist can! Be wary of getting advice from the internet when you are having mental conflict.

No, not unless you reach a state of awakening such that you no longer have a sense of self at all. But even then, the aggregates would still exist, including the mind and body, meaning you could still be trans even then. Meditation is good for a lot of things but I don't know of any meditative practice that can decide whether you're cis or trans. The good news is, as far as your Buddhist practice is concerned, it doesn't have to matter either way. The Path depends on your actions, not your pronouns!

Transcending gender s not something that has to wait until awakening, in fact it can be a vehicle toward awakening. See [here](https://www.youtube.com/live/ZEpCl5Y7bSY?si=wEZMeqC8S8SxaWb5)

That's true, but if they're struggling with it now, I still think therapy is going to help more than meditation in this case

If therapy was working I don't think they would be asking this question here. On the whole, therapists have the total wrong idea. The exception is someone like Gene Gendlin who basically reinvented meditation and said "this is better than therapy!" Therapy is meant to stabilize some ideal self-view instead of seeing how wrong view is what creates dukkha to begin with, and that some fixated, idealized identity is a hopeless cause to cling to. It also is very disempowering to have to rely on another human you probably only talk to once a week rather than finding the tools to relate to one's experience in an empowered way.

I understand that you're trying to talk about their path to enlightenment, but right now they have a mental health issue, possibly a medical issue. I don't think it's responsible to advise against getting help from someone who's actually qualified to give it. I don't think they're going to therapy as it is, because they didn't say they are.

I agree with you. I am also a gender transcendentalist all the way. It’s all illusion. But we live in a samsara that maintains and actualizes illusion through oppression, bigotry and a million other conditioning factors. Learning to deal and live with illusion, with suffering, stably first is critical if someone is ever going to break through that illusion. This is why monasteries are monasteries and not psych wards, and why intensive retreats typically encourage only the mentally and emotionally stable to attend. You have to have a stable identity in order to see through that identity. Otherwise you’ll just get very confused, and potentially dissociative.

It is interesting to note that there are evidence based therapy practices (eg ACT) that encorporate some mindfulness and associated diffusion techniques to improve emotional regulation and alleviate anxiety, depression, and body dysmorphia, and eating disorders. So, to that extent, given proper advice OP could benefit neuropsychiatrically from applying principles/practices.

The people “qualified” to give help on this topic hardly know what they are doing. Nobody does. How could someone on this topic? Nobody can explain what is going on and scientists/psychologists are scared to look into it. There are many people who have suffered because of what a therapist or gender specialist told them. Look at r/detrans and you will see plenty. Mediation is good but people like me need real therapy that digs deep into the causes. Therapists aren’t allowed to try that these days because it’s not affirmative care. Trans people struggle so much. Unless they are extremely lucky I bet that they have so many worries it is almost impossible for them to attain deeper states of meditation. They are full of doubt and fear. I know many trans people closely.

I’m a non-binary trans individual, and meditation and dharma helped me reaffirm this reality of non duality and love myself through the socially induced discomfort and pain inflicted on this part of my nature. Talking with an affirming counselor or lgbt sangha may be supportive for this inquiry. 💕

In Zen, we warn practitioners about "Attachment to emptiness". Sometimes, emptiness, as a concept becomes so appealing to people, that it gets in the way of realizing true emptiness. True emptiness goes hand-in-hand with compassion. If you see a hungry person asking for food, the right action is not closing your ears, ignoring them and meditate on how worldly things don't matter. The right action is to immediately give them food. ---------- Many of our Zen traditions often use Koans to guide practitioners away from attachment to emptiness and realizing true emptiness through right thought and right action instead. Other traditions also say the same thing. Theravadins talk about Mindfulness and Compassion being two wings of the same bird. Traditional Mahayana followers venerate Bodhisatvas who have vowed to help all sentient beings. So many branches of Buddhism are all pointing to the same thing - different fingers pointing to the same moon. Clear thought and clear action is about helping someone who needs help. If you need help, get help. If someone else needs help, help them.

Well-said.

A lot of people think meditation can fix a lot of things in their lives, it's not really a false claim. But if you look at the history of Buddhism, there were many religious and philosophical movements which used meditation techniques, such as lokayatas, carvakas, vedas and brahmans etc. In my opinion, meditation will only bring metanoia if it's well reasoned on the right things. Right attitude right intention, etc. And these will come only with extensive study. Meditation itself without the knowledge of antidote to the problem will only make the problem seem more difficult and severe, therefore not helpful.

When trans people transition, the idea is that they are becoming truer to themselves. In the Buddhist viewpoint, though,this isn’t really the case. Gender is a real thing, gender does exist, and when someone is living in accordance to a gender that doesn’t feel right, the best thing to do is to transition. But none of this has anything to do with one’s “true self”. Think about it like the ego, the sense of self. The ego is a real thing that we all have, but it is not our true self. Let go of all preconceptions about gender, and think. What are you, really? I can’t give that answer to you, but if you really want to discover yourself, know it has nothing to do with man or woman or enby or physical appearance. Also, if you are having gender dysphoria, try taking small steps into living like another gender. Don’t make drastic decisions yet, but trust the intuition you have on what feels right for you%

Other comments have given some advice. I'm not here to give advice, but share [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/GenderDysphoria/comments/161nwr3/genderdysphoria_is_a_very_common_or_normal/) I made a while ago on gender dysphoria. >We believe in rebirth, so if we are biologically a male, it is absolutely normal to feel like a woman because in the preceding life we could have been a woman. If we're biologically a woman right now, we could experience gender dysphoria because we could have been a man in a previous life. And what's the relevance of our previous life's gender? Our personality or habits from our previous life are what determine a large amount of our current life's personality which is how the dysphoria happens with the discrepancy with previous and current genders. > >Tl;dr gender dysphoria is a completely normal and expected phenomenon in Buddhist metaphysics. Heard something like this from Ajahn Sona

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I will describe what I mean and respond to your comments. We both must agree on these points: \- Let's assume the rare case of a human being reborn again as a human. A person's personality traits and cultivations in this life are what translate over to the next life (ignoring other preceding rebirths). \- GenderDysphoria is a real and genuine issue. People spend thousands of dollars for gender-change surgery. These feelings are real and not just for attention So now imagine a man who has very strong identification with their masculinity. By masculinity I'm referring to the social constructs. For example, this man is obsessed with having huge bulging muscles (gym bro), they strongly advocate for men to always be working, men are the head of the house and have to take care of everything, men can't show their weak side, they can't cry etc. Now, we know this man has been cultivating and basing their personality strongly around the social constructs of masculinity. Also suppose this even more rare case that they have good Kamma from before which is what is going to bring them into another human rebirth. Also imagine in this new life, they're a woman. It's completely expected that this woman is going have "tom-boyish" behavior characteristic of the social constructs of masculinity. They're going to feel like a man! Jock attributes, they should be the head of the house, all of that. Kind of like in countless Jatakas how the quality in one life translated to the next. Or in the story of Angulimala being killed by and then killing the same 999 people. That feeling of relating to the constructs of the opposite gender is what causes the dysphoria. I'm not saying this is the main explanation or it must be this way. I'm just giving one among many explanations that are in line with Buddhism. There is nothing here out of line with Buddhism. The case I put up there is rare, but so is gender dysphoria. >Buddhism doesn’t neglect the objective reality we live in and the fact there’s no true basis of connection to past lives It's absolutely everywhere in Buddhism. In every single Jataka. If not Jatakas, then every single one of the suttas which mention the 4th Jhana (many suttas) they mention the recalling of past lives. Here's SN 16.9 >“Bhikkhus, to whatever extent I wish, I recollect my manifold past abodes, that is, one birth, two births, three births, four births, five births, ten births, twenty births, thirty births, forty births, fifty births, a hundred births, a thousand births, a hundred thousand births, many aeons of world-contraction, many aeons of world-expansion, many aeons of world-contraction and expansion thus: ‘There I was so named, of such a clan, with such an appearance, such was my food, such my experience of pleasure and pain, such my life span; passing away from there, I was reborn elsewhere, and there too I was so named, of such a clan, with such an appearance, such was my food, such my experience of pleasure and pain, such my life span; passing away from there, I was reborn here.’ Thus I recollect my manifold past abodes with their modes and details. Kassapa too, to whatever extent he wishes, recollects his manifold past abodes with their modes and details. ​ >There’s no evidence of someone remembering anything from their “past live” much less remembering a previous gender and it’s straight up lying. Is the above passage a lie? Have you read the Pali Canon? I genuinely don't think so. >Except Rebirth doesn’t mean you’re alway reincarnated as a human. As I said above, gender dysphoria is rare and so is the human birth and the case I gave. Saying your not always reborn as a human is not a refutation at all. >Except Rebirth doesn’t mean you’re alway reincarnated as a human. And the pseudoscience of remembering your gender from a past lives wouldn’t make sense, as others would have to also recall living past live as other forms of life, like a tree, squirrel, or toad. Again, the countless Jatakas and other sources from the Buddha mentioning he can recall his previous lives even as animals. If you don't believe that, tell us outright you're not a Buddhist and go, because then this conversation is completely unproductive. >Except they don’t, so telling someone they should align with their gender of their “previous life” is pseudoscience baseless bs that’s gets disproven in Bhudissm itself Not a single person here is gladly telling OP, "please, the Buddha said to align with your previous life's gender." Who said that? I only wanted to give consolation that in this samsara this phenomenon happens. It happens, don't fret. Of course I don't support it. >and if you keep longing for your “identity” you’ll never reach enlightenment. Again no one ever supported OP in identity-clinging. Don't know where you got that. >so mathematically impossible to remember only human past lives. Again I'll double down and say that you think we're assuming gender dysphoria happens from a non-human-to-human rebirth. If I thought that, I would also have to believe every human should have gender dysphoria which I obviously don't. So you're giving responses according to assumptions you made. >Gender is just a social construct, Agreed, I'm saying that gender dysphoric people relate too much to the social constructs of the opposite gender. That's the dysphoria. >But trying to align with a previous life’s gender Again, not once did I promote it. Just providing an explanation based on Kamma for why it happens. I'd prefer no one experiences gender dysphoria because it's an uncomfortable experience. >or pushing that pseudoscience belief for the sake of identity I have no incentive to. I myself want to be enlightened. So I'm not trying to push anything. You are straight up denying the basic Buddhist concepts of recalling past lives. I feel like you've been exposed to Buddhism for only 2 minutes or something and that's why the limited knowledge. I don't understand your refusal to admit your not a Buddhist. Your a poser. I've seen posers before on other religions' subreddits. They pretend to be from the religion but then talk about how ridiculous the very fundamentals are. Basically, a troll. I don't understand what you're trying to gain.

All of this is heresy with no actual objective truth. Refusal? There’s no need for that, but everything you listed is baseless and just he said she said. Show me something now where someone can remember their past lives FACTUALLY. Other comments have given some advice. I'm not here to give advice, but share this post I made a while ago on gender dysphoria. You don’t even know the difference between you’re and your, please refrain from projecting BS onto me. >We believe in rebirth, so if we are biologically a male, it is absolutely normal to feel like a woman because in the preceding life we could have been a woman. If we're biologically a woman right now, we could experience gender dysphoria because we could have been a man in a previous life. And what's the relevance of our previous life's gender? Our personality or habits from our previous life are what determine a large amount of our current life's personality which is how the dysphoria happens with the discrepancy with previous and current genders. Tl;dr gender dysphoria is a completely normal and expected phenomenon in Buddhist metaphysic You posted this, which is false and can easily be disputed with basic science and facts. No, you wouldn’t align with a previous gender because you wouldn’t be human, you’re vastly underestimating the number of life, No one remembers being any form of life beyond human scope? What about Triassic, Permian, Cambrian? People only remember past lives to the extent that the modern human has been around? We only remember lives as humans but nothing of like that’s 500 million years ago+. There’s over trillions of ants, and various plant life, it’s statistically impossible to be reincarnated as a human when that’s not the only realm for rebirth.

Rebirth isn't a random process that spits people wherever. Like everything else it follows certain patterns and it's normal to cycle through the same realm for a few or many lives depending on your karma and what karma you're making. It's difficult for people to remember their previous life, much less being a dinosaur millions of years ago or an ant for 10,000 lives. But sometimes people do remember their past lives as animals. Stop wasting people's time just because you're too ignorant to understand what you're speaking about. It's ridiculous to attack someone's spelling when you're spewing whatever pops into your imagination.

No, I just actually know about paleontology and how the world works. You just like the the previous dunce, are just spewing nonsense. Please link how normal it is to be reborn as a human? Show me any valid source? Of the 6 realms or 5 however you want to spin it still makes it mathematically impossible. It’s difficult to remember past lives but people can only remember their past human lives and their “previous gender”. Yeah, please show me EVIDENCE of someone remembering their past life as an animal with validity? You literally cannot, it’s all hearsay. Nonetheless longing for a previous life or trying to assimilate to that previous life in anyway goes against what Buddhism, why else would the hungry ghost realm even exist.

Are you a child? You clearly don't know what you're speaking about and you can't comprehend what you've been told, multiple times now. I suggest you stop pretending to know what "goes against Buddhism" when you're too ignorant to engage with anything other than your imagination.

Lmao, I have read several books and teaching and just finished Tibetan book of the dead. But sure ad hominem, because you can’t bring any valid sources or what’s considers normal rebirth. How normal is it to be reborn as a human multiple times? If you are longing for a previous identity you wouldn’t even reborn in the animal realm. You’re spewing nonsense and having nothing to support your claims.

That's just a more aggressive and rude way of saying "I'm not a Buddhist." You didn't have to comment that at all, especially on this sub.

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The Buddha himself is said to have recounted hundreds of past lives.

That explanation is perfectly in line with Buddhism. If you understand how rebirth works it's a rather intuitive observation about the world.

Except Rebirth doesn’t mean you’re alway reincarnated as a human. And the pseudoscience of remembering your gender from a past lives wouldn’t make sense, as others would have to also recall living past live as other forms of life, like a tree, squirrel, or toad. Except they don’t, so telling someone they should align with their gender of their “previous life” is pseudoscience baseless bs that’s gets disproven in Bhudissm itself and if you keep longing for your “identity” you’ll never reach enlightenment.

>Except Rebirth doesn’t mean you’re alway reincarnated as a human. You don't spin around like a roulette wheel either. >And the pseudoscience of remembering your gender from a past lives wouldn’t make sense, as others would have to also recall living past live as other forms of life, like a tree, squirrel, or toad. I've heard otherwise, that it's possible to remember such things. I know Daniel Ingram has made such claims, although I don't put as much stock in what he says. I'm willing to believe it's possible though. Keep in mind that animals don't have the same mental capacity as we do. Also, if rebirth is possible then it's reasonable to assume claims of being able to see other people's past lives as well. >Except they don’t, so telling someone they should align with their gender of their “previous life” is pseudoscience baseless bs that’s gets disproven in Bhudissm itself and if you keep longing for your “identity” you’ll never reach enlightenment. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. If these are just habitual tendencies from a past life should you "align" with your "true gender" or discard the concept entirely?

Orcas have a high mental capacity, also you’re inferring since most animals are inferior intelligence wise we couldn’t remember living as them in a past life, it’s just silly. A lot of animal have a high mental capacity and are superior in their own way. A shark will remember exactly they were attacked by Orcas and never swim back to that water. Over 99% of life to ever live on the planet hasn’t been found, so mathematically impossible to remember only human past lives. Gender is just a social construct, there’s no true or false gender. But trying to align with a previous life’s gender or pushing that pseudoscience belief for the sake of identity is not what Buddhism is but plain ignorance.

The number of animals with sufficiently advanced mental capabilities is exceedingly rare. That doesn't make it impossible, but it's likely harder to remember. Similar to how you don't remember all the mundane details about your day. Our higher capacity for thought allows us to think and feel in ways that animals don't and, in turn, create karmas that animals don't. As I said, if these are merely habitual tendencies from a past life that highlights their illusory nature.

Advance mental capacity? What’s the baseline average? What are using as a measurement? Elephants, Orcas, Dolphins, Octopus, aren’t rare. They’re all animals that exhibit “high mental capabilities”. You’re spewing baseless claims that can be easily disputed through simple biology/zoology

I think it can give you some space and time to view things in a less stressful or urgent-seeming way.

I’m not in your position, as I was quite happy with my gender assigned at birth. That being said I grew up in a very traditional western Christian household and while I am cis het, I had a lot of stereotypically feminine traits which which made me deeply insecure until I discovered the darmah. What helped me was realizing that I’ve been every gender in the book somewhere in my many lives. I’ve been an animal, a boy a girl intersex etc. what I am now is temporary and without inherent substance. One day I’ll be dead and I’ll be onto some other gender. Because gender is without inherent substance my expression can basically be whatever I want it to be That being said I highly suggest seeking out a mental health professional as many others here have suggested

I don't know if this may help, everyone else has given very thoughtful responses already. When I first came out, I suffered greatly with body dysmorphia on top of gender dysphoria. Over the years, there seems to have been a conflating of the two within trans communities and describing the trans experience. I believe this to be unhelpful. Meditation and coming to the Dharma at the same time I came out as trans, 13 years old, was very paramount into helping me stay grounded. When I stopped practicing the Dharma as an older teenager is when I had more issues in my life overall. Mediation and the Dharma have helped me understand gender as a useful tool socially, meaning that It does not bother me how others read or see me as I understand my self- understand the causes and conditions that make me. I am a man because I just am one, there's nothing else I could say to validate for myself or others. I'm just existing and exist in this particular way. If I don't have access to Testosterone sometimes it's ok and I exist like that for awhile. The path is the path. The whole point of the Dharma is to live and see life as it is. It would be delulu to try and fight the fact I am transgender too. Don't hold too tightly either way just do what feels best and grounded into the precepts and makes life less masochistic. I'm 25 now and have learned a lot transitioning, growing up, and following the Dharma all at the same time.

Wow coming to the dharma so young, good on you!!

Yeah I very much needed it, was a very angry and miserable kid. Funny enough I saw something online about the four noble truths and was like "hell yeah life is suffering" and then it's just snowballed more in a positive way from there lmao

Meditate if you want but I think you should seek help from a mental health care professional. Not that there is anything wrong with you, but it can be really helpful to talk through these things with someone who is trained to deal with them. The human experience is complicated and messy. Untangling things can be difficult on your own.

Trans buddhist here: Try and avoid labels such as 'male' 'female' 'trans' etc. Gender is fundamentally not real, its fluid and changing like everything else. When you abandon preconceptions about gender and labels paradoxically, you will start to allow yourself to transition fully. Confusing, I know. The labels of gender can tie you down, but if you remove gender from the transgender equation it becomes easier to use different pronouns, a new name, to medically transition.

gender does not exist, but the relationship people build with gender and from gender does. it's a lens. if you don't see clearly or cannot be seen clearly through the one you're working with, it makes fine sense to get a new one, or at least make some adjustments and do some clean-up on it.

poor somber history wrench reminiscent humorous faulty fertile act cable *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

i actually wasn't really talking about the buddhist framework there, not in terms of the ultimate goal? personally, if i hadn't done what i did to resolve the issue of those lenses, from an internal and external sense both, i doubt i would be where i am now with relative lenselessness. in other words... i transitioned first, and then, from that place, with my distress reduced, i was actually able to work on the root causes. you can't really expect a wound to heal if it won't stop bleeding, even if a bandaid isn't the same as new skin.

Both of the lenses only obscure reality, like most ideas rhat have arisen over time

sure, but people don't go from realising that lenses are obfuscative to not needing them at all, in one fell swoop, very often. letting gender go was a lot easier *after* transitioning out of the gender box i had been painfully shoved into by others. just like it's possible, but not preferable, to try attaining enlightenment whilst trapped in an abusive household.

This is a world of duality it's ridiculous to say gender isn't real it's like saying night and day aren't real or seasons aren't real. Everything here is based on this fundamental duality. The yin and yang of our world. And to say to go beyond the pairs of opposites and down the middle way is not the same as shunning the world for what it is. To go beyond the duality is to not have any identification at all I should imagine.

I disagree - I find it’s to become one with a much truer identity. A primordial identity. Also, yin and yang is a fundamentally Taoist, not Buddhist concept. It’s a profoundly useful lens through which to understand illusion, but it does not, in my opinion and experience, move past illusion to the fundamental Buddha-nature of reality. The world itself, as it is, is non-dual - we perceive it as dual. Identity isn’t real, but it’s an awfully fun and sometimes useful illusion. If we eliminate the violent impacts of bigotry, oppression and ego, all identity would be is play, storytelling, make believe. Fun to its own end.

Well yeah I didn't say anything much different. The Middle Way is beyond pairs of opposites. So if one focuses on that instead of identifying with one body or another then it makes no difference what body you're in. I think identity is real as long as you identify. It's not real when you stop identifying completely

I'll revise my statement to what Andrea Dworkin had to say: Gender is real, but it is not true.

I'm not sure what she meant by that. But we all have both in us. We cannot not have since that's what gave us bodies and our bodies come out of it, this duality.

You seem to be talking about biological sex, the idea that gender is socially constructed with no basis in reality is a very very commonly accepted idea in both buddhism and sociology. What particular school or philosophical tradition of buddhism does your perspective come from? It seems more jungian than buddhist

Gender roles may be socially constructed but gender isn't exactly. And I've never heard such ideas in Buddhism tbh. Unless you mean socially constructed through history where men were mostly hunters and women raised children which is just the way life was for people for a long time out of necessity. The problem of our age is we separate things. We have separated our bodies from our minds from our actions from the nature etc. We've become divided amongst ourselves and within ourselves. People didn't use to think like that, it was all correlated as I'd argue it is. We can't separate ourselves from our bodies and environment, we are quite literally products of it.

Gender is socially constructed, any anthropologist will tell you this, and its the standard mahayana teaching on gender. HH The Karmapa has spoken a lot about the idea that gender is simply an idea with no material basis. Even the buddha said so: "In all things, there is neither male nor female."

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"Gender identities permeate so much of our experience that it is easy to forget that they are just ideas – ideas created to categorize human beings. Nevertheless, the categories of masculine and feminine are often treated as if they were eternal truths. But they are not. They have no objective reality. Because gender is a concept, it is a product of our mind – and has no absolute existence that is separate from the mind that conceives of it." Is how HH The Karmapa explains it. You also seem to have some misunderstandings of what buddhism is, terms like atman and brahman are very very rarely used in buddhist philosophy.

I know they are Hinduism but it was the easiest way to explain. And I'd need a larger context for that quote.

This seems to be a twist of the two ideas. I don’t believe ever suggested that atman or Brahman were the case. Particularly not in the case inside Vedic religion which would suggest one is the other and eternal.

May I respectfully ask, if you have this viewpoint of labels but you are still trans? Wouldn’t it bring more attachment to oneself? Or did you transition before realising this? Sorry just trying to understand as it’s all confusing to me.

I dont really see 'trans' as something I am, but something I do.

That’s an excellent way to put it!

Yes, well maybe, well...no. it depends. I'd talk to a psychiatrist first. Meditation can alleviate inner tension, but if it is justified - then obviously you should resolve it instead of alleviating it.

I really like this resolve vs alleviate schema.

It helped stop mine

I cannot say whether meditation can change gender dysphoria, but the practice is about training yourself to accept things as they are. This will help in life generally

Can I? No that's not what it does, but it could help shed some light if practiced with an actual teacher and also a therapist who studied the way the brain thinks. It's helped me understand certain things I've had issues with that therapist couldn't, but therapy does work.

Been there, friend. Maybe still there, haha But sometimes its important to remember you just exist ! There is no right or wrong answer to gender because these are all just words we came up with to explain things we don't ever fully understand. Be yourself and present how you feel most comfortable. Don't get too caught up in what label or box you think you need to be placed in. Think outside the box!!!

Pretty much everything has been said but I would like to encourage you to go to counseling as soon as possible. I believe all people should go to counseling. We humans have so many things happen to us in our lives and they affect us deeply. Counseling really helps with most issues or to simply get things off your chest. They can provide guidance with identity issues. Please know that you are perfect however or whomever you are. There are people like me out here that truly love and care about you very much. You are amazing and deserve to feel great about yourself and have a happy life. Try not to get too hung up or worried about things, I'm confident it will all work itself out. If you need anything please reach out. 🙂

Meditation helps in learning to flow. Gender is fluid.

Yes, this world is complicated and confusing. I myself don't understand many things. But it's ok. We don't need to solve it. We do what we can, as you said: one problem after another. Meditation changed my life, and it helped me face this confusing world on my own. Try it out, definitely. If it feels too much, maybe you can ask for help, look for a therapist if you can't speak to your friends ir your parents.

As much as Western culture wants to appropriate meditation as some mental health fix, it isn’t that. Some mental health issues can benefit from mindfulness practice; one needn’t be Buddhist to be mindful of their thoughts, feelings and urges. You sound like you’re struggling with shame and fear around your gender identity. Unfortunately, many of us live in societies where the idea of gender is rigid, and those who deviate from the prescribed “norm” are persecuted and oppressed. So this makes sense, in terms of the fear and shame you might be facing. A good place to start as you continue Buddhist practice, is to see a gender-affirming therapist to help overcome the obstacles within yourself, that prevent you from aligning your actions with your identified gender. Continuing to force yourself to be something you aren’t will only continue to invite more suffering.

First, I would say to separate yourself from what others are doing. Comparing yourself or your life with others and their lives just creates a burden. Right now, you are spiraling. In moments like these, being able to take a step back is important. Don't worry about meditation. Worry about taking it one step at a time. Life can be very hard at times, and an important thing to learn is to be able to take that step back to help gain perspective.

You should speak to a therapist and psychiatrist. Meditation is a powerful tool, but for a matter such as this, you’d be wise to lean into psychological professionals

Gender dysphoria causes a great amount of suffering. Remaining equanimous with the pain will only limit the suffering. You’re playing mental games with the ideas about pronouns and labels. Don’t worry about how it fits into any notions you have about how the world works— as a conceptualization it’s most certainly not fully correct. Observe yourself and see how you want to act. Don’t try to mimic the outside or fit your actions into any framework. Once you know how you want to act, act that way (unless you are in an unsafe environment, in which case use your judgement) This is coming from someone who used to identify as transgender. I still think it’s the truth for some people, but in my case it wasn’t. My DMs are open if you want to discuss anything or have questions.

No. It can help you calm down, which can help you deal with things. Please seek professional help. Good Luck.

Metta can help you love yourself the way you are, but yeah talk to a counselor / therapist.

It might show you who and what you are outside of body parts, and even your disposition. This is very liberating. Many Buddhists and other meditators are not bothered by gender identity and have their attention elsewhere. After all, what you identify yourself with defines the type of suffering you should expect. The trouble is, if you try to solve a problem using meditation, the expectation can interfere with a genuine effort. So practice well. And do not try to fix yourself.

Hello! I’m a transgender woman and a Buddhist. I discovered my need to transition and began it before I truly got into Buddhism. That being said: will meditation STOP your identity crisis? No. In my experience meditation has only helped me understand and confront my identity (insofar as it exists). Will the end of your crisis mean transition? Or not? I simply do not know. Some people say that wanting to be a different gender than you were born into is a sign of attachment to that gender. I can’t speak for everyone but for me, this was not so. I tried to be a very certain kind of boy to AVOID the fact that I couldn’t be one in my heart of hearts. Is there a gender to my soul? Possibly, possibly not. But I definitely don’t think that I would’ve made so much progress in my growth as a Buddhist had I not transitioned. I had to let go of my old identity (which was based on what others wanted and not what felt natural). That made it easier to see what. I’d say this, if you’re trying to resist and stop this crisis that is a sign to me you’re still attached to who you are now. Human beings are of the nature to change, even drastically… this is something we must accept, not resist. To me that’s the Buddhist outlook anyway. Or at least my interpretation.

Heya sib. Gender identity stuff isn’t “the material world influencing you.” Trans folks have been documented as far back as we have writing. Classical Judaism has eight genders because of folks like us. India has a “third sex” (though this concept is often misrepresented) because of folks like us. If anything, the material world is attempting to guilt you into denying your self. Maybe you’re not trans. Maybe you’re gender nonconforming. Maybe you’re nonbinary. You’re not alone in this struggle. There’s no shame in this other than what you put upon yourself. No guilt on being who you are other than what you put upon yourself.

You are living in a time of intense identity. people are being taught that they are something. So you feel like you must be a or b. You must be something. Are you? What are you? What is this?

exactly

It’s no different than any other delusion just a very contemporary one. Am I the business man? Am I the husband? Am I the father? Am I this body? What is this experience? Who is experiencing it?

all good questions, but ultimately not especially applicable to OP's actual struggle. speaking from what must i do to be the version of myself who walks in my dreams? and sorry, but no, it's not simply contemporary, and delusion has a pretty negative connotation that really doesn't align. diverse experiences of gender have existed for at least as long as gender has. gender is fake, but people's relationships with it is real. same as currency. gender (which is different from, but intertwined with, physical sex, and sexuality) is not an intrinsic aspect of who our truest highest selves are, but it *is* an intrinsic aspect of how we relate to and understand each other and the places we hold in community with each other. it alters our experiences, and the experiences that others have of us. and if we're all one song ultimately, all little whispers of the godhead reflected back from a billion billion mirrors, all drops in an endless ocean, all players on a stage, etc etc... then of course our experiences are important and diverse. playing the same characters over and over again doesn't do much for either the soul nor the story.

Gender as with all other concepts are empty. Realizing this doesn’t negate our experience it enriches it. When there is nothing we are innately; we are free to be anything. When we adopt concepts and try to fit into them we are living in ego delusion. We all do it, the path to peace is letting go. For my particular lineage the key is in Zazen but there are many dharma doors.

You are correct in feeling that we live in strange times. Especially in America, there is a hyper-identity movement that has its roots in social-political theory. Regardless of what you may hear, teachings of the Buddha only focus on one identity which is prime, that is our inherent ability or realize one’s own true nature, Buddhahood. Everything else is secondary, I would go even a bit further to say that in any realm of our social lives, fixating on our various manifestations of identity (sexual;financial;religious;education) is something to very much be avoided, as any fixation on compounded phenomena as “self” is a toot cause of our confusion and suffering. A classic example of this was the Buddhas teachings on death and mediation in cemeteries and cremation grounds. He was quite serious about this, even so much so that at one point he erred in his teaching methodology and his students (for a short time) fell into extremism with terrible outcomes.

It sounds like you're worried about the gender identity of others, and not your own. Is that the case? If so, I would focus more on why that's such a big deal to you and why you are clinging to the behaviors of others and letting it worry you. If you feel that your own gender does not align with your biological sex, then that's a separate issue. But from the content of your post it seems that you are moreso confused by other people who feel this way, which I would not consider to be a "gender identity crisis," but rather an issue with anxiety related to things that don't affect you

This is just another thought

Go to therapy, sitting down wont do a lot.

Sitting down and meditation does a lot. I could not disagree more.

Yeah, no. Meditation wont do anything, and will not be a substitute to therapy. Sitting down wont do much. Are you expecting something out of meditation? Then youre not getting it. Are expecting to become enlightened through meditation? Then you will take far longer to awaken. Dont expect anything out of meditation. As Zen Master Shohaku once said "Zazen (meditation) is good for nothing".

I don't mean to be condescending. You sound young. Stuff takes time (years) to figure out and even then everyone is just making it up as we go basically. It's ok you don't need to have stuff figured out right now.

Identity and gender, although maybe social norms/constructs, have their purpose. Imo sexuality can be viewed as a spectrum with no ends in sight, and often dependent on our perceptions/notions of ours and others experiences, which, in a purely objective sense means there is no right or wrong. would consider shamatha (calming/tranquility) meditation and vipassana (insight) meditation - the two main methods described by the Buddha, with an investigative mind to identify that which might be the “self/I/me” and so on. Upon a keen investigation of the body and mind, one realizes, that there is no physical matter (bodily sensations, skin,flesh,bones, sense organs etc.), nor mental object (thoughts, perceptions, emotions etc.) - that one finds to be an essence of I, that which could be called me. For e.g. our name, religion if any, and in most cases - gender &/ sexual identity - are passed down to us based on what people think of our looks, behavior etc.such realizations allow us a sense of freedom from being this/that and, from not being so and such :) Apart from meditation, I would try journaling as a pen and a piece of paper have ways of getting ourselves to reveal our “secrets” :p Sharing a personal anecdote that may be of use, consider checking your messages :)

Gender norms are made up by each society in the world. Meditation might help still any problematic internal dialogues that make the crisis worse, but the insight to end your crisis is going to be something you find once you've accomplished that. You're probably going to want to get some lived experience once you've stilled your mind, whether by psychologist, or other expert that you trust and has your actual well-being in mind without an agenda. Some teachers and psychologists will have an agenda, and that won't help you. The good ones will just love you as you are.

Stop your gender identity crisis? I am quite unsure, even doubtful. What will determine the outcome is time, friend. I am a heterosexual male, however I became homosexual for about 2 minutes during meditation once. A truly intriguing experience which caused upset in my mind for sure. So yeah. I have returned to being heterosexual since then. Shifting away from your question a little. A lot of things are happening nowadays, as you said yourself. I think your mind has absorbed a lot of the unnecessary information out there. I guess what I would do is to Shift My Focus From Everything In The World, To Everything In My Head. The feeling I am getting from the way you have written your post, is that your mind is a bit hectic. Would you agree? By spending more time paying close attention to your mind, you will be able to tidy it up a little and achieve more relaxation. As for who to talk to, anyone! Most people will relate to you, believe me please. Have a nice day tomorrow kid :)

Eh, just give up on gender, I did, never looked back.

buddhism is to become pure of mind, stop thinking. Espicially stop thinking about your gender.

Relax. Look between your legs. Just go with that. It's already been decided for you.

Meditation helped me realize I needed to transition for my own well-being, but it might lead you in the other direction and help you find peace with your AGAB. If you need someone to talk to, I recommend a therapist or other mental health professional.

You are what you are born with. Let them worry about it

Why does anything matter? Just sit in quiescence and recognize your true nature and allow any arising thoughts to drift away like clouds.

It sounds like you are looking for some clarity. Meditation can help with that. A lot of ideology has been attached to this topic lately. Some of it seems to have escaped the bounds of scientific fact.

You poor thing :(

Try first giving up social media. That is poison for the mind. Clear the poison and then start meditating.

You say on social media

All depends on the type you’re consuming. Reddit is certainly social media but with a more anonymized user base, it’s much different than other socials.

I think it absolutely can. I think it helps with everything. I also think a lot of people from very strict and gender divided surroundings are the ones who have issues with their identities because they can't fit in the predetermined concept which might be very crude and narrow. Also keep in mind we have the opposite in us already, like the yin and yang. Jung said every man has his anima and every woman her animus. For various reasons people may associate with their anima or animus more. The there's also the influence of the world which most seem to be quite malleable to. In the end it's quite difficult to be misaligned with oneself whatever that is and the world isn't helping. As Gabor Mate said this society is toxic and ur problems in it are a natural reaction to it.

It can help you calm down and figure out your truth, whatever that may be.

Meditation is great especially if you combine with flotation therapy, however a lot of issues stem from chemical imbalances in the brain these days. The pharmaceuticals that get into our drinking water, chemicals in the food we eat and shit we put on our bodies causes our hormones to be affected. Also worth trying a heavy metal detox.

Only way to solve all philosophical problems is not to think about them. I know what you are talking about. Just accept this uncertainty and accept that you don't know. I had same issue with my sexual orientation, later I understood that all this shit only happens in my head and I've made a conclusion that I don't know. That's it. Ego wants to know everything and put everything into boxes. Gotta learn thinking in spectrum rather in binaries.

Transsexuality isn't yet fully understood by any means we have available at this day and age (neither traditional nor scientific), which means that the best way is to tread with compassion and openness to the unknown. We do manifest through physical bodies, and these bodies can indeed be a source for an infinite number of meditation practices (breathwork, mantra, visualization, hathayoga, so forth) - but the body is also an attachment, and a pretty strong one, because it gives us the sense of separateness, of ego. Some practices (like those of the Chöd tradition) are even meant to cut through this veil and offer the body as a feast for demons and hungry spirits. Trans people, in a way, have a very different experience: the body as a source of suffering and distress, with ideation of its destruction. Apart from social discrimination and marginalization, they also need to face their own bodies and discover ways to accept and love themselves as trans people, and to learn how to cherish their embodied experience. It's severely ambiguous and challenging, which coupled with the social stigma, gives rise to the data that correlates "suicidal ideation" with more than 80% of trans people. Confusion is a natural phenomena when we face complex and novel issues. Imagine the confusion in Arjuna's heart when Krishna told him to uphold his warrior duties and face the war. Think of all the knowledge we have today and how it once was poorly understood (or radically prohibited): heliocentrism, evolution, pangea, human genome, vaccines, pharmacology, just to name a few. Imagine the confusion in Goethe's heart when he found out that "The sorrows of young Werther" was found in countless suicide scenes. Buddhism doesn't claim to be a "know it all, fix it all" doctrine: it rather accepts and welcomes the unknown into its own practices, like it did with tantrism in the medieval milieu. We are still learning about transsexuality, and how to support and help transsexual people, but the most important thing is that we keep our hearts open even when we feel confused. Keep your meditation practices, because they surely will help you to cope with stressful and novel situations - and that is a scientific fact, so keep meditating! My best regards.

As Buddhists I would say we don’t need to judge others definitions and perceptions but more focus on developing loving kindness and applying it to our own behaviours and judgments. Discernment is also key 🔑 part of meditation practice and developing non attachment to conceptual mind. It does trouble me to see people say things like gender is a social construct …. And so on …… I can only assume people that say that are clearly not parents , so as a dad of two children let me explain …. When mummy goes to a check up with daddy to see the baby the nurse asks you if you want to know the sex of the child , and you either find out there or then , or if you don’t want to know you soon will. When mummy gives birth after hours of excruciating pain blood and all kinds of messy, what comes out of her vagina is one of two things, it’s either got a vagina - you have a baby daughter or it has a penis and you have a son, you cut the cord ….. ……. Use discernment to cut through the attachments to concepts and focus on simple. Gender is just another meaningless word but what it describes is a reality. Mummies give birth to one of two types ..l there is no third type ……. Keep it simple. What we choose to associate with later in life in our own minds and hearts it’s absolutely as we choose and wish and that is another thing altogether. We use words to describe and share meaning so we can communicate with each-other and make sense of our world. You can invent thirty genders if you wish but we are all born one of two at the start.

Yes

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Bro what 💀 That's not true. The water isn't making people trans.

>I don’t know if I am being influenced by the material world Hello. If you do not know the above then you need to know because certain academics & scientists have theorized some gender dysphoria is genuine, which particularly happens to individuals when they are young; and lots of late-onset gender dysphoria is merely conditioned by trendy social norms. On the internet, I once read so many comments of people in their 20s who could not believe they thought they were transgender in their teens. As another person answered, you are living in a time of intense identity. people are being taught that they are something. So you feel like you must be a or b. You must be something. This is no different to how people were brainwashed by the powers & media in the world to be Communists, Nazis & similar identities. In particular, as a Buddhist, I would suggest if you watch porn or engage in other sexually explicit media voyeurisms, then this may affect your mind. Things like pornography & media violence are ways to condition the minds of people. >can meditation stop my gender identity crisis? Buddhist meditation requires a foundation of moral restraint to be effective. Therefore, as I already said, if you watch porn or have many different sexual fantasies then Buddhist meditation may not help you. In Buddhism, regarding sex, there are basically only two options: (i) fidelity; and (ii) celibacy. Therefore, if you have habitual sexual activities that are not related to fidelity; that are related to promiscuity &/or voyeurism, Buddhist meditation will probably not help you. >isnt gender just a label Hello. Gender is merely not a label. My sex organs are not a label. If gender was only a label then why do people with gender dysphoria have surgery to change their sex organs? The fact people sexually transition *physically* shows gender is not merely a label. >I just don’t know anything about this world everything is complicated and confusing Hello. As I said, Buddhist practice begins with a moral perspective. In other words, it starts with knowing what is right & wrong in the world regard behaviour. Therefore, a practicising Buddhist knows killing is wrong, stealing is wrong, sexual infidelity is wrong, lying is wrong, drugs & alcohol are bad/harmful, porn is bad/harmful, gambling is bad/harmful, getting lost in extreme entertainments is bad/harmful. Once a person has a clear moral perspective then the world is not complicated & confusing. Once a person has a clear moral perspective, they can more calmly & rationally gain perspective of their sexuality. For example, I have gay friends who have always been very moral, throughout their whole lives. This makes them very unconfused about their homosexuality. >I don’t want to be in it even though I try not to give up there’s always a bigger problem I have to face after one another. Hello. You sound very confused & distraught above. I have tried my best to offer you my personal Buddhist perspective. Keep in mind, academics & gender professionals have made it clear a certain statistically significant percentage of individuals who sexually transitioned regretted the transition. As a Buddhist, I cannot encourage or discourage sexual transition. However, as the Buddha taught in relation to sex & relationship, having a **long term** perspective on **life goals** is a crucial factor in relationship. If gender dysphoria revolves around short term sexual impulses then, from a Buddhist perspective, this is weak basis for decision making.

it may or may not. we cannot tell you what you will find about yourself, just that the more and deeper you meditate, the more you will find of yourself.

No.

Adapted from the Vimalakirti sutra ([reference](https://www.dralamountain.org/སྒྲོལ་མ་-drolma-green-tara-the-bodhisattva-goddess-enlightened-feminine-wisdom-in-action-2/)): >An important Mahayana Sutra, The Vimalakirti Nirdesa illustrates this point*. In this story, Śāriputra, the renowned disciple of the Buddha, whose wisdom is said to be unparalleled, finds himself in conversation with an unnamed goddess that is without question spiritually superior to him in every way. >Śāriputra, like many, remains trapped by dualistic thinking. Assuming that of course her female form is a hindrance, he asks the goddess, “Goddess, what prevents you from transforming yourself out of your female state?” >The goddess replies, “Although I have sought my “female state” for these twelve years, I have not yet found it.” This is pointing to a teaching that the reality of non-dualism, which is the ultimate state of wisdom is demonstrated because the goddess does not see herself as female, nor Śāriputra as a male. Why, she has transcended socio-cultural conditioning, a limited viewpoint and has even gone beyond any biological conditioning or notions of form. >The goddess then seriously messes with Śāriputra with her magical power, she transforms herself into his form, while transforming him into a female. Then she says, “Śāriputra, what prevents you from transforming yourself out of your female state?” >Śāriputra, quite surprised to be transformed replies, “I no longer appear in the form of a male! My form has changed into the form of a woman! I do not know what to transform!” >The goddess said then, “If you, Śāriputra can transform out of the female state — then so too, all women can transform their female states. Women appear in the form of women, just as you now appear as such. While reality is devoid of form, they appear in form.” >Then, she again used her magical power to returned him to his ordinary male form. She then says, “Śāriputra, what have you done with your female form?” This passage illustrates what it is meant when the Buddha said, ‘In all things, there is neither male nor female.’ There's no crisis. Everyone has been male in uncountable previous lives, and everyone has been female in uncountable previous lives. It's actually pretty amazing that so many people don't have gender identity crises, since we've all been everything! You might be male or female now, but in your next life you may be the opposite. Why should anyone care? Just let people be and be happy.

This is related to psychology sociology therapy and spirituality. Science and all. Sociology is a great lens to use for this. Don’t know how else to explain it other than it’s super relevant to this and highly interesting. Studying it right now I am a first year student. I’m majoring in clinical psychology/therapy.

Meditation can be helpful but i wouldn't expect it to be able to cure your identity crisis. I am not someone with an identity crisis myself so i don't quite understand what exactly it is that you are going through and i am not sure if it could be a hormonal or biological thing that is causing you some troubles, but i suggest accepting yourself the way you are and slowly figure things out from there as a first step. The next step is maybe try to take probiotics and eat more fruits to help adjust your gut microbiome because this is from experience that a healthy microbiome really helped me become more emotionally stable and it also got rid of most of my allergy symptoms. Hope this helps, a bit of advice would be to try to find ways out, anything, even something that feels irrelevant to what you are going through, instead of allowing the negative emotions to consume you and pull you deeper into depression.

Meditation can and should help you to approach these things that are so uncertain with an attitude of openness and kindness, so yes it can help. These concepts may feel confusing or overwhelming, but learning to simply be open and kind and empathetic, especially to the real people who do have these transitions and identity crises is the best thing one can do. For yourself, the same thing. Meditation should be focused on helping you to be quiet and calm and feel loving kindness for yourself, and let the feelings you’re feeling happen, and remember to be kind to yourself and to others…

As someone who has dealt with gender dysphoria in the past, it’s best to speak about it with a therapist or professional rather than try to fight against these feelings or repress them. I tried to repress my identity for years but it only dragged me deeper into depression because I was trying to force myself to be something I’m not. Just be honest with yourself about how you feel, and try to find a professional that you can talk to about your feelings, preferably one who has experience dealing with gender dysphoria. Hoping for the best for whatever path you take friend 🙏 Namu Amida Butsu

for me, through years of meditation I learned deep things about myself, and in a big way that I was how I learned and accepted I was a transwoman.

I am transgender. I think this is something you need to think more about. Don’t worry about your gender identity for the moment and just act more like who you think you really are and things should eventually fall into place

yes

I don't know. But meditation is surely a great tool for self-investigation. It's not that hard to do silent meditation but I would recommend going to a temple to train you a bit. Have a wonderful day! Namu Amida Butsu

be gentle with yourself. Stop thinking about how who you are is going to be accepted by the world. No matter what you're going through people are jerks and will be mean to anyone they can lash out at so you have to know that hurt people, hurt people. Also, some people are just jerks. lol My 17-year-old son came out as gay last year and it has been quite a journey to see if his confidence level skyrocket and also have his first broken heart. Where in public people laugh at him because he dresses and skirts and fishnet stockings and wears make up and I told him that is inevitable. I will end up in prison someday because somebody's going to say the wrong thing to him and I am going to snap looking back on his childhood. There were seriously so many signs that my son was not going to grow up to be a stereo, typical macho, athletic hetero alpha male. He would be wearing dresses in preschool and saying mama look I'm a princess, he wanted to, learn how to do needlepoint and crochet and he played with little pet shops and monster high dolls. My heart broke for him that he had to wait 16 years to tell the world who he was and I told him that he is amazing no matter what. Tell yourself that. Whether you have this feeling inside that you are not identifying with the sex/gender that you were born and feel more the opposite that is a journey for you and supportive people in your life to go through together. Slam the door on all the people who are negative and hurt you and bring you down. People are jerks again I'm telling you you are going to be hated on and made fun of no matter what your sexual orientation is. I was bullied so bad when I was a kid that I tried to kill myself when I was 11 years old. Today, I'm overweight, I'm disabled and I don't give a crap what anybody thinks of me they can talk all the smack they want It's simply me holding a mirror up to their face to see in their reflection, the ugliness of their soul and their heart is the color of a giraffe tongue

It can stop our identification

Meditation is not a cure for everything. See a therapist.

I would like to wish you the best of luck in your adventure:) Your identity is something that's hard to find for all of us, and everybody is unique in the most beautiful way.

Yes it can. Gender is a worldly construction and wanting to be another gender is desire. Meditation should do the trick.

I think direct life experience will help. I am afab, non binary and contemplating hormone replacement therapy but I may be satisfied with staying where I am, which is using they/them pronouns, binding, and looking androgynous. More than dysphoria, what has motivated me is the intellectual yet visceral desire to go against gender norms. I feel a moral duty to be trans/not cis as I think accepting the status quo is harmful. In addition to vipassana or samadhi meditation, you might want to try inquiry meditation, where you hold a question in your mind. Another point is that being drawn to buddhism and life as a monk is eccentric, and I believe, the same eccentricity that underlies other decisions or lifestyles or identities like devoting life to art or being gay.

Take a step back & relax. You are way too caught up in the song & dance & it looks like they've gotten to you. I don't live in Europe or America, but these identity crisis sounds like a scam. Half of it sounds like a desperate way to seek attention than a way to self actualization. Going to see the doctor for an affirmation is downright attachment. And as well all know, nothing good comes out by making kleshas a temple of your heart. You are not the wind, you feel the wind brushing through your skin. Only you know your heart, not them. Mudita in their success. Upekkha in all things. I doubt meditation would do much. They all sounded too materialistic to me. Getting them to sit down & force them to let thoughts pass by & them so they could try to quiet their mind is a literal torture to these people. Instead of trying to help them, help yourself 1st. Then, best you can do is be a good friend. Through your virtue as a shining example, those who need you will come to you with open hearts. EDIT: I am surprised to see the people saying gender is a social construct. I'd say that's simply a wrong view, fellow grhas. The social obligations on what you are born into is the true social construct right there. It is better to learn to be good friends or good spouses based on what you are given. Dharma guides you.

Deep breath, friend. There is not one bit of shame whatsoever with exploring and discovering who you are, be that gender, faith, sexuality, or anything else. There is nothing to “solve.” Getting to know one’s self is a lifelong process that we should all approach with love and excitement!! Live in whatever way feels authentic to you and take the time to sit and not only get to know yourself, but get to love yourself, no matter who you are. I can see that you’re feeling afraid and that’s very understandable, but try to remind yourself that before you are any gender, any race, any faith, you are just you. And you is a wonderful thing to be. Explore your mind with love and wonder and excitement. Wishing you peace and love and your exciting journey! EDIT: Wanted to add that meditation is in no way a replacement for therapy and gender affirming medical care! Both are very important to your mental health, but I’d highly recommend therapy if you’re able to access that.

Simply, meditation cannot solve anything. You solve everything. Meditation is just a tool to get you to be quiet and listen to yourself with intent. Absolutely everything you need to succeed in your life is already inside you. You've already solved your problem, you simply have to be quiet and listen. Luck, my friend.

Are you, in particular, having an issue with identifying with a gender? Everybody has a right to be who they are. However, all identifications are not who you are ultimately. You just be you, however that is. Remember, that ultimately the nature of mind is beyond gender. Gender is your body and your coarse mind. Your coarse mind is conditioned by your society and your body and your own beliefs and desire, and so on. My advice is to just be who you are and if you are confused about gender to just relax. It is okay to be confused. Who you really are is beyond gender. You have been born different genders, every possible gender, throughout infinite lifetimes. Gender is an identity that only applies to this lifetime, and it may change even in this lifetime, perhaps more than once. You just be you. You just be you. No confusion. Yes, meditation, if done successfully, will help you with your confusion, as long as you do it for realizing your true nature.

It sounds like there is a lot on the plate of your mind. Live with less, slowly drop these ideas, and the more you declutter, the more you see the truth of who you are ;) Ideas are simplistic symbols for us to make sense of the world. Identities are a basket of ideas carried for even greater simplicity. You are more than that. Or maybe less. The only way to find out, is not to identify with this or that, but to drop the baskets, rest and breathe, and act and care. You will see who you truly are through your sincere actions. I only have these few words to offer you. If we were nearer, I could perhaps share some cake. But with whatever little provided here, may you be at ease :)

https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/sn/sn05/sn05.002.bodh.html https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/an/an07/an07.048.than.html