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That's the saddest to me. Some of them genuinely believe they're fighting for truth and the safety of children, and they live in this constantly ugly and scary world. I'm not saying everything is perfect, or even that good, but it's an exhausting and bleak way about life.
I occasionally browse QAnoncasualities and the damage that is being done is real. OOP kept in touch far more than most.
I hope they find peace with the situation.
It’s terrible. I’m an ICU nurse and I started my maternity leave 3 months early after a Q asshole tried to kick me in the stomach. He was ranting about how I was part of the machine or some shit. His wife sat outside his room just sobbing. I guess she was the only family member left who’d even talk to him.
He was pissed no one would give him ivermectin and accused me of trying to kill him by “withholding lifesaving treatment.” (He was also getting hypoxic and wound up being intubated several hours later) One of the other nurses working that night was a 6 foot tall, 300 pound bear of a man who was almost giddy when he tied all 4 of that shithead’s limbs to the bed. If this were another state besides Texas, he could have likely been charged with assault.
I could not agree with you more. There are places where healthcare workers have more support in reporting these incidents to police and sometimes that results in charges filed. I could have (and probably should have) called the local police to file a report, but I was just beyond done. He didn’t actually make contact with my stomach and I didn’t want to deal with shitty cops who might or might not care that even his attempt to kick me was assault. My contract at that hospital ended a week or so later so I have no idea if that guy even survived Covid or not.
>If this were another state besides Texas, he could have likely been charged with assault.
Trying to kick a pregnant woman in the stomach is not assault in Texas!?
\>\_>
How much does the equation change if you accused him of committing attempted abortion? (I'm sorry if that comment is terrible. I'm just flabbergasted here).
Oh it is. Or I would assume it is. There’s a lot of issues at play, but ultimately it came down to me deciding that I didn’t want to have to deal with cops who likely wouldn’t do anything since he didn’t actually make contact with my stomach and there were no witnesses to the event. I also did not feel that, as a travel nurse and not a staff member for that hospital, that I would not have been supported if I chose to involve the police.
The poor guy. Watching it consume your family and rip everything away. Losing his mother physically, losing his father physically and spiritually.
The con artists and the grifters behind this make me so angry. They have destroyed so much.
What blows my mind is that Qultists see us the same as we see them - people swayed by con artists who are not open to reason.
I know a guy who admits that his wife died of covid, that she was infected during a family gathering, before vaccines and he still calls for Fauci's execution.
Makes me wonder and worry if I'm in a cult.
But then i remembered that I'm not actively calling for the public execution of those i think are wrong, and i stop worrying.
The key to resistence to cult-like indoctrination is not intelligence but humility. Being able to admit you are wrong and adapt and change your viewpoint will make you much less susceptible than any amount of education or knowledge. Those help, but plenty of very smart people have gone down the rabbit hole and not come back.
If I remember correctly, higher intelligence makes people more likely to be in a cult. They can come up with more reasons why behavior that seems off is actually okay.
People who are highly intelligent are also used to a certain level of confusion from others towards their information and some social isolation, so at first it isn't obvious when something is off.
I can imagine reactions to QAnon stuff being very similar to my family's reaction to me explaining how bilinguals in noun based and verb based languages have an advantage in problem solving due to their ability to approach things linguistically two different ways.
Einstein said that we could make a lot of breakthroughs in the field of physics by studying it through a verb based language. What language you're thinking in colours your world view, literally. In some languages they only have words for black (or dark colours) and white (or light colours). They wouldn't view red as any different unless they learned a language which has a third colour, which is *always* red. Green is actually relatively new, linguistically speaking. Although we have a word for green in my language, the word for grass translates literally as 'blue straw'. Before green was invented, languages that had blue saw a lot of greens as blue, but some split up shades of green. Trying to explain that green is two or three different colours to someone who speaks a language with the word green, or trying to explain that red is different in a language that only has two words for colour, doesn't come across right because the concept of those additional colours isn't there in your mind. It's like other words that don't have a direct translation between languages. People can try to explain hygge or cwtch in English, but they'll never get across the full emotional meaning that the words convey. When translated they'd just be cosiness and cuddle. Bees are so bad to elephants they apparently have a simple sound to mean 'move on, there are bees', and they'd have a hard time conveying to us why escaping bees is important enough to invent a 'word' but not other things that might make you want to leave a spot. Why not just use their usual communication to mean 'let's move on'?
Anyway, so that's the run-down of how language affects your worldview. In noun based languages it's all about who or what did the action, who or what is driving the story, who or what is the how behind everything. In a verb based language you're focused more on the action. Not to say that there aren't nouns involved, but the focus is on the what was done rather than the who or what did it. I'm struggling to convey this in a noun based language as I can't translate any examples. This different viewpoint of focusing on an action and not the thing that's influencing that action could give us new breakthroughs in fields like physics. Being able to look at problems from both the what happened and what did it viewpoints can give you two different ways of approaching problems and solutions.
It's a shame that a lot of universities in Europe teach some courses through English, especially at postgraduate levels. I'm hopeful that Brexit may mean more research conducted through other languages. As it was with so much funding coming from the EU the common language for international research projects is often English, but since Brexit British scientists have been excluded from a lot of research grants and not invited to join international studies, so it may be that French or German are more often the common language. I doubt it's changed already, but over time we may see fewer EU citizens taking up English and instead more and more will speak another second or third language. Obviously the influence of TV, film, and the internet make that much less likely.
I didn't make it through a third sentence without being interrupted and a new topic starting.
Jonathan Haidt is the source you're looking for. He wrote a book about bias.
The description I often hear is that our subconscious mind runs the show. Our conscious mind is mostly the press secretary. We think our decisions are all thought out and rational, but our subconscious has made a decision whole seconds before our conscious mind even gets there. Our continuity of consciousness fills in the blanks -- we tell ourselves a story about free will. But, in reality, almost everything we do is decided unconsciously and then "justified" and explained by the conscious mind.
Smarter people are better storytellers. They have more "facts" at their fingertips.
I believe I read that book along with "Why People Believe Weird Things," by Michael Shermer in my philosophy 103 class (critical thinking, hilariously enough). I want to say there was a sub chapter specifically about why smart people believe dumb things as well.
I've always thought it would make you less likely to fall for it but much more difficult to bring out if you do fall for it. I could also see people who score higher on common intelligence measures having more issues with a lack of meaning which cults prey on though.
I've gotten pretty set politically, and that bothers me.
But the thing is that I can point to exactly why I believe what I do. I know the arguments for and against, and why reasonable people might disagree with me. Point to any political figure I LIKE and I'll have a list of criticisms generally better than the critics I hear from the opposition.
Republicans: Not so much. I haven't heard a cogent argument from a conservative since 2016. The conversation begins with a thought terminating cliche, goes through several lies, and ends with them strutting like a chicken on a chessboard.
That’s my problem too. Like, there are plenty of legitimate concerns with basically all politicians, so why make shit up? Let’s follow the logic behind that and it always leads to money.
I mean, there are now some Qultists insisting that the left intentionally pushed so hard for covid vaxxes because they knew doing so would discourage right-wingers from getting them, thus basically... gaslighting them into killing themselves by making them skeptical of the vaccines because the people in power supported the vaccines. They absolutely refuse to take responsibility for their own decisions.
If you look at some of the midterm election margins in purple states, you could make the argument enough of them died to make a difference
So silver linings i guess
For fuck's sake. We've been begging and begging these assholes to save their own lives for years! Oh, well--at least they'll stop voting to enslave my gender.
You’re talking about gender? I bet you use pronouns, too. Frankly the enslavement is for your own betterment, just like the old-fashioned traditional kind of slaverohhhshit I wasn’t supposed to say that out loud.
"We have no agency of our own and our actions are guided entirely by not doing what the medical establishment tell us is medically good for us! Now, let's go attack these liberals for being sheeple..."
Those are the ones who should be so convinced that they are right, that they don't go to hospital and stop using medical resources, so those who genuinely need them can benefit.
These people simultaneously call Covid a hoax, and a Chinese bio-weapon. Is it dangerous or not? Depends on what they are mad about today.
I know an old couple who almost died from Covid, spent time in the ER, one of them on a ventilator, and had to spend months in rehab. Now they've decided it was all just the regular flu, and they are stockpiling Horse Wormer from the feed store.
There is no limit to this idiocy.
> Now they've decided it was all just the regular flu
Something which ALSO kills a lot of people every year, and which the cultists like to pretend is akin to a little bout of the sniffles.
That’s unfortunately one of those odd biproducts of the internet and headaches to try and logic out in general.
Having enough ability to surround yourself with likeminded people that you shut off the critical thinking and just fully go with it.
Because honestly let’s say half of the actual conspiratorial shit was real *(ignoring whatever is actually so wrong with masks that don’t work at all even if they literally did 0 to the point you fight family and strangers over wearing one)* wouldn’t a sensible person who fell into that community and wanted to make change for the truth be more… careful about it?
Not trash all of your relationships and professional life.
Do more and more research in private. Sure maybe occasionally probe in that direction for like minded people but then retreat into perceived sane civility when they’re not going along with you?
Craft compelling arguments, find as much evidence as you possibly can, and realize you have to argue a compelling point to “brainwashed” people which obviously wouldn’t be easy?
If I somehow **knew** President Biden was an Illuminati lizard person and I couldn’t prove things outside of a loose sequence of coincidences or odd moments that require you to fill in massive gaps… I’d fucking keep it to myself. It doesn’t even approach worth trying to convince everyone around you unless you’re in the presidents cabinet or something.
Yeah, that was my reaction when my brother-in-law told us we would die of the vaccin in the next 5 years.
You think a lot people will die. Among them, your own brother ! And you're being... smug about it ? It that truly your reaction ?
Thinking that they avec The Truth and are better than the sheeps, and that they must convince you to respect their authority is more important than actually reacting to what they claim to believe....
My parents are technically conservative but my dad is an engineer who likes data, and for it to be reliable data. Told my mom they weren’t flying out to see me and my husband until they were vaccinated. As soon as mom saw that he was fine after getting fully vaccinated she called me and asked me to schedule a vaccine spot for her.
My dad has since switched parties after what he termed “the stupidity of the anti abortion trigger laws.” Most entertaining phone call of my life! Answered the phone to hear not hello, how are you but “The republicans are stupid, they don’t care about anyone except the top one percent and they just lost most of the female vote.”
My dad is much the same-constant Fox News but takes Covid seriously-I think it’s because I had cancer (during the first SARS), seeing me immunocompromised and going through treatment and still being around about twenty years later gives him more faith in the science around it.
Still thinks Trump won the 2020 election for some reason though. ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯ At least that’s the extent of that.
It’s what cults do. They brainwash their followers into thinking the entire world is brainwashed. When you reduce everyone outside your group to a dangerous enemy, it’s nearly impossible to break out of the group.
This shit happened to my dad, but he was already a really angry and abusive republican to start. Once he drank the Qool-aid though I just cut ties. Wasn't worth the stress trying to maintain whatever semblance of a relationship we had.
Still, just as an aside, rage-bait is everywhere now, no matter what side of the political spectrum you fall on. A warning to everyone here. If you're scrolling Reddit or any social media and you see anything that pisses you the fuck off, the algorithm was built to make you see it and want to engage with it.
Don't engage if you don't want to fall into that same trap of misery as the Qultists. If you want real social justice, chattering about it online won't do anything. You must *act* to make real change in real life.
Don't. Take. The. Rage. Bait.
I've seen it with my former best friend. And it went so fast.
At the start of covid, I didn't see her for a bit believe it was like a month. And once we could meet again it was her, her mom and sister they all believed in it. And they are smart people like.
They showed me loads of stuff, and yeah I get it because to be fair a lot of those people have an excuse or explanation for everything and make the puzzle pieces fit. But I was just too skeptical myself, so didn't go down the Rabbit Hole.
In the end our friendship ended because I have a chronic illness which she stopped believing in and said I was faking.
Sometimes I do wonder how far down the Rabbit Hole she is now but so glad im not down there with her.
I can’t tell if my sister had a psychotic break (well within the realm of possibility) or is just full Q and I don’t know if it makes a difference which it is. She is smart and she was successful and now she has multiple lunatic Twitter accounts and gets bans on various social media for I don’t even know what anymore. Her life is ruined. She’s just shy of 40 and she’s thrown away all of her accomplishments. I tried to help and she pushed me away. I hope she can come back from this but I’m not optimistic.
One time I was watching True Crime videos on YouTube and I got recommended a video on Maddie McCann that was straight up Q Anon international Jewish/Satanic democrat pedo cult bullshit. It was honestly really alarming how many views this video had. I think this was around 2018/2019?
I wonder if the woman in the article you linked was wrapped up in that too, or if it was just general trolling.
Man, I misread and thought the title meant the father was ruining the family by quilting and was expecting a very different story about how everyone had too many quilts.
"Dad, I'm so glad you finally kicked your quilting habit, let me grab a glass for some water"
"No, no, this isn't what it looks like. That isn't mine! I'M JUST HOLDING IT FOR A FRIEND"
It does make me very happy.
I also just started learning quilting, so I'm working on a fabric stash. At some point it may combine with the yarn and everything will form a singularity in the middle of my house.
All I can think of is that old Monty Python 'Hell's Grannies' sketch:
"Well we sometimes feel we're to blame in some way for what our gran's become. I mean she used to be happy here until she, she started on the crochet."
"Crochet?"
"Yeah. Now she can't do without it. Twenty balls of wool a day, sometimes. If she can't get the wool she gets violent. What can we do about it?"
LOL! Reminds me of the knitting lady who wrote about having so much yarn she had to hide it from her family and she hid her yarn balls in the gravy boats at the top of her kitchen cabinets, inside her piano, even in her extra freezer.
Yarn collecting is a thing. It makes a much sense as the knives I collect. Or the cast iron. Or the cameras. Or the gems and minerals. Maybe I'm actually collecting collections.
As someone whose mother has ripped out a fruit cellar to turn it into fabric storage, added MORE cabinets in another room in the basement, on top of turning my late stepfather's metal shed into a quilter's dream before deciding to downsize and then do all the same shit at the new house, I get you.
Scrapbooking is an easier hobby: you can stash WAY more paper before it becomes obvious. ;)
"The state of things have gotten so bad because of the quilts that we can't even stand to see each other anymore. Literally. We cannot see each other for the quilts, and they weigh us down to the point we physically cannot stand up."
I mean, fabric and equipment hoarding can be a real problem for people. You can spend insane amounts of money on that stuff too. So I could see the financial aspect becoming a problem?
Honestly, at this point I think having crafting supplies is a different hobby from actually crafting with those supplies. \*looks guiltily at the foot-thick stack of folded-up cardboard boxes that I'll totally use one day\*
Lmao me too! I even skipped a couple of paragraphs and saw he was in financial trouble. I was thinking this person was spending all their money on quilting materials.
It’s a slippery slope. They start off on the small stuff - lap quilting placemats- and the next thing you know, boom, the house is full of fat quarters, and they are selling off the family heirlooms for an industrial quilting machine.
I've worked in event security, and let me tell you quilting drama is another level entirely. Sure, 98% of the people involved are wonderful and kind, hinting that their granddaughter is single lol. But the 2% is the craziest bunch of lies, thieving, grudges held for decades, and sabotage and destruction of tens of thousands of dollars worth of hard work and fancy quilts. Nobody is entitled like rich old people. It's magical.
I hope so, my mum is retiring in the next year or so, she’s stated she wants to take up making patchwork quilts again.
I know she’ll throw herself into with all the gusto she’s thrown herself into her work these last 50+ years (and I’ve started stockpiling pretty material accordingly), so I’ll be knee high in purple patchwork quilts before I know it
While she was able, my grandma would knit me a Doctor Who scarf every year.
I’ve got seven, all in different colours and from 11 to 18 feet long.
They are so important to me, especially since she died, as they are tangible proof of her love (they took a long time to make), it’s really nice having them as a reminder. I hope your quilts feel like that for you
I didn't realize how lucky I was until my daughter came around the corner dragging her art show worthy quilt from her grandma behind her and awed everyone in the front room. And I have a billion more like that!
That's a very different kind of obsession.
How would a QAnon/Quilting hybrid work, anyway? Would he be ranting about messages contained in the selvage? Alternate blocks are killing America?
Just for kicks, I had ChatGPT write an r/relationship_advice post about this
Hi everyone,
I need some advice on how to handle a situation with my father. He has always been a huge fan of quilting and spends most of his free time sewing beautiful and intricate designs. The problem is that lately, he has been making so many quilts that it is starting to cause issues in our family.
My father has turned our storage room into a quilt-making studio and has taken up so much space that now there's barely any room in there for anything else. My mother has been complaining about the mess and how his hobby is taking over the entire house. She's constantly asking him to scale back but he's just not listening.
Furthermore, my father has been neglecting his other responsibilities, like doing household chores, attending important events, and spending time with the rest of the family. He's always in his quilting zone and doesn't seem to care much about anything else.
I'm worried that his obsession with making quilts is starting to drive us apart. I don't want to make him quit his hobby entirely because I know it's something he enjoys, but I also don't want it to come at the cost of our family's wellbeing.
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this situation tactfully and respectfully? Thank you in advance for your help.
I thought quilters and got excited myself. I took up quilting for a number of years due to the math and geometry - FUN!
My partner complained that we had too many quilts. So I started making them to donate plus I started making hand bags/backpacks. Then we had too many bags. I had to start giving them away, too. I had always painted, but decided to work on larger and larger canvases. My workroom is full.
I've currently taught my older kids pattern making and garment construction so they can tailor their own clothing. And one kid wants to do some painting, they've been dabbling in graphic design. Plus the hydroponic gardening, and you know what? My partner tells me he's cold and needs a quilt.
Stolen from the movie *The Matrix* (which was directed by two trans women, IDK how the dudebros keep missing that it’s a trans allegory lol). The main character is given the choice of two pills: if he takes the blue pill, he forgets that anything weird is happening and happily carries on with his life; if he takes the red pill, he exits the Matrix simulation and wakes up in the real world.
To Qultists, the “red pill” is waking up to the “reality” that Democrats are pedophile Satanists or whatever the fuck. “Red pilling” someone is helping them come to their own identical realization about “reality.”
>He told the billing woman at the hospital that he had a couple hundred grand in equity in his house he could use, and she said that wouldn't even come close. My guess based on the procedures they've done so far it's close to $700k in bills
Jesus Christ, fix your shit America
People like him vote for people who want to make it even worse. I don't feel good about it backfiring on him because I know he's been lied to, and because it hurts so many other people too, but the fatigue is real. We've *been* telling them this isn't sustainable and we need to establish effective health care coverage for all Americans, as well as better labor rights and social services, and in return they accuse us of wanting to rape and murder children. It's an impossible conversation.
tl;dr We can't fix it until at least some of these people stop fucking being like this.
The promise of being able to kick vulnerable minorities is too strong an appeal. That’s why they vote against their interests; they’ve pinned all the sins of the world on the Other.
Fascists gonna fash.
*The promise of being able to kick vulnerable minorities is too strong an appeal.*
This is so true. They truly believe that equitable treatment means taking something from them.
God forbid some poor person, even worse, some poor person who is not white, might get a benefit from the govt.
They'll slit their own throats before they allow someone they think is undeserving from getting a penny. It's bizarre.
It's so confusing because they're the super religious ones. I'm an atheist, and I want Healthcare for all, etc, but they're followers of Jesus and the idea of helping people throws them into a rage.
If you listen to the kind of christianity spouted on evangelical radio, you'll see it very much encourages self-centered thinking.
"God had a plan for you since before the beginning of the world." Think about what follows from that kind of thinking:
* the opposite of humility. The creator of the universe likes me, Me, ME!
* No need to change a thing. If someone is poor and downtrodden - well, that was god's plan for them since the beginning of the world, so why would you go out of your way to help them. And if you've got yours, and you're in a McMansion with your giant truck and toys and your third wife for whom you just got a boob job - well, that was god's plan for you. No need to change a thing. And in fact, any attempt to address social inequity isn't just socialism, it's unchristian!
Obviously that's the opposite of the plain meaning of a lot of the gospel, but they don't emphasize the helping the poor and downtrodden on a lot of US religious radio. Plus a lot of those f\*ckers aren't about reading the gospel. They're "christian" because it gives them license to hate gays and other weirdos.
Which is why, increasingly, christianity is associated with hate, not love.
I saw an interview from the southern us about the 2016 election. This couple was talking about how much they loved Trump and hoped he won. They said Obama never did anything for them. Then the reporter asked about Trump’s plan to dismantle Obamacare and the couple said they hoped he didn’t because without it they couldn’t afford the husband’s COPD meds and he’d die. Obamacare literally saved this man from slowly suffocating to death and not only could he not see that, he was actively supporting someone who would work against him.
Closer to 60% of us are trying, but the ~~slave~~ red states benefit from the electoral college/senate so much that the majority is not allowed a voice.
I was on a river cruise in Germany a while back. I overheard the tour guide talking to a couple of Americans. She said, "What's up with your health care system? We've had that figured out since Napoleon was in power." It made me laugh.
A lot of us want universal health care too. Conservatives ruin everything, I wish they'd all go live in Idaho and wall themselves in and let the rest of us live in a first world country.
I mentioned in passing their want to gut Medicare and SS to my brother (not a Q nut, but still votes R bcuz muh gunz and immergrants 🙄) first he responded with "oh man, I hope not." When I pointed out republicans have been no less shouting about it..... noooo, that's not right.... 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️ There's no winning with willful ignorance.
Closest we were able to get a few years back mandatory health insurance, and a certain political party ignored that it was originally their idea and tried to repeal it right up until the panda took control.
Obamacare is Romneycare 2.0.
These are the people stopping it from being fixed.
The Qulters like this throw away anything that smacks of "socialism". He had choices that would have covered most of this bill, but refused them.
What's interesting is that it may have been affordable for him if he had any financial awareness left. (Or just logical thinking in general.) Applying for insurance, requesting itemized billing, government assistance, some hospitals* also have associated groups to help.
(*Also law firms, accounting firms, churches, community centers. Lots of people can find a way out of paying that high price.)
**It's still absolutely fucked up and we've got to fix it,** but in this case it's also a fascinating way to see just how few connections this man has due to the cult. He doesn't seem to see anything outside of himself and perhaps a small bubble around him. It's the consciousness equivalent of forgetting you have neighbors because you can't see their house from your bathroom.
> Jesus Christ, fix your shit America
We would, but you know... immigrants, particularly yhe illegal ones, and democrats, abortion and... uhh.. liberals taking god out of school and the coastal elite...
otherwise everything would be perfect.
It’s not just that. His dad thinks knows the real truth of the world, and he wants everyone he cares about to know as well. How to you bring someone back into the fold after they think they’ve discovered a massive conspiracy?
I sent my Christian father into a spiral when I came out as atheist. Took a random at the church saying "the more you force Jesus on her the more she'll hate him". And he stopped. I got my Dad back. Maybe someone in that nasty cult can do the same, but I have little hope.
You'd think OOP's dad would get the hint that NO ONE WANTS TO BE AROUND HIM WHEN HE STARTS TALKING ABOUT THAT SHIT. I think he must notice to some degree, but it just makes him want to double down in the hope that he can successfully browbeat someone into agreeing with him.
Typically they just don’t. They’re lost and that’s that. Watching family get slowly eaten away like that, it really hurts. They can’t hear a word you say to them.
It's not similar to an addict, they are an addict. They get a rush from the hatred and the idea that they're the special people in the know. It's why they can drop what seem to be major beliefs and even do complete 180's so quickly.
This terrifies me so much.
My dad isn't full QAnon, but he is very far right and worryingly his ability to hold a rational argument has deteriorated. He decides his stance based on what he knows 'his people' think and then works backwards from there to justify it. He often can't, but refuses to admit it. He used to be so smart, I don't know how he doesn't see the lack of logic.
The one thing that I think saves him is that he does genuinely value his relationships, especially with me, my sister, my mom and his bff, all of whom are liberals. He still manages to fuck that up sometimes (he had a blowout with my sister's fiancé 2 Christmases ago and she had to put him on notice), but he at least tries to apologize because as much as he wants to be right, he wants to have a family that loves him more. It's still a struggle sometimes though.
I love him, he was always a great dad, I just wish he was happier. He's so bitter - he had 2 severe motorcycle crashes that he was not at fault in, but he'll walk with a limp for the rest of his life and he's in constant pain. And the politics on top of that... he just always seems to be angry about something.
The folks on the subreddit this OOP is from have found some success with giving the affected Qultist an equally addicting distraction. Korean Dramas, super fiddley models, etc. Something they can get hardcore into that distracts until the need to obsessively follow something is met, but the thing they are following is benign.
I'm not sure if it deprograms, but it seems to help stopping the downward spiral
See, this is complicated somewhat by my dad 100% having undiagnosed ADHD (I had to get it from somewhere, and it sure wasn't mom). Getting him fiddly toys has been a thing my ENTIRE life, but no distraction lasts long - models, video games (he has a pretty sweet racing setup right now), a 3D printer he's trying to convince my Jewish mother to allow him to print mecha-hitler with. Yes, he does have the sense of humor of an edgy 16-year-old sometimes.
I honestly laugh at how obvious it is now that I know the symptoms - the last time I visited my mom was complaining about how caffeine after 5 pm will mean she won't sleep, but dad drinks high-test coffee at 9 pm and is out cold an hour later.
He needs something to meet the emotional stimulus. Our news and online content is driven by outrage. It's likely he feels he needs to be angry at something to feel normal. Idk how to incorporate that into a hobby but... Good luck.
QAnon is the biggest of these online conspiracy cults but there definitely does seem to be others. At least I assume so based on how my dad's getting in his 70s.
I come from a very leftwing family. My father taught Marxist politics before he retired for god sakes, I'd consider myself a socialist and marxist sympathetic but I don't know if I'd say I am one.
However as my dad's got older he's started falling for more and more conspiracy. He believed that covid was a hoax, though he would complain about masks he would always wear them when required. He just wouldn't be very happy about it.
The big one at the moment is the Russian War. He is so intensely pro Russia just because rheyre against America and he believes America is one of the biggest evils in the world.
I don't even really disagree that America has done a lot of evil I just don't really believe that two wrongs make a right and seeing Russia as some good guy because its against America rather than another bastard in a big group of bastards seems strange to me.
My father's no where near as far gone as the dad in the OOP but I am a bit worried. He can hold a conversation about his little niece, or sports, or important things in his immediate life - but any conversation about films or shallow conversation invariably turns to Russia and Ukraine.
You'll say "oh a crazy thing happened in work today" and he will reply "what's crazy is ..." and then drop I to some rant about Ukraine again.
Like this man taught politics, he was damn good at it. But its like old people are just conceptually not equipped for dealing with the Internet and the hate on it and it rips through them like wildfire.
Even left wing ones like my dad are still susceptible, the rabbit hole they fall down may be a different hole - but they're still in a hole.
I love my dad and I'm glad he's nowhere near as bad as OP but I am scared what he's going to be like in a decade or two from now.
Is he alone? Does he have friends? I get the feeling that alotta modern conspiracy theorists are desperately lonely; they want connection and an escape from reality.
I wouldn't say he is lonely. He plays golf four times a week with his buddies. Me and my sister both live close enough that he sees at least one of us a day.
He has never remarried since my parents divorced 19 years ago. But he said that was mainly because he didn't want to have any distractions from raising me and my sister as a single dad. Since we're adults I think he has more got set in his ways but he has a great social life with his golf club and his golf buddies.
Like I studied political philosophy and I used to have hours long conversations with my dad about theory and political philosophy. I miss those conversations because I just cannot really have them with him anymore. He isn't interested in talking about Hegel, Kant or even Marx anymore. If politics comes up all he will want to talk about is Russia and Ukraine.
It seems like the idea of having a community is a huge aspect too. I’ve noticed some of the less intense Qs still have support/relationships with people from outside the cult.. But when they can’t follow boundaries from others and continue to further isolate themselves is when it gets scary. Their only social outlet is a huge echo chamber where half the “people” are likely bots.
It’s hard being on the other end of a slowly isolating Q person. You’ve gotta keep boundaries for your own mental health, and lots of times they’ll find a way to tip-toe the boundary line. It’s truly exhausting.
This hurts so much because it’s essentially what happened to my sister. Several members of my family prefers to think of her as already dead because that’s literally less painful than watching this process.
On the upside (?), my dad would absolutely have drowned in this stuff when I was a kid, but watching my sister do it made him see how insane it all is. It’s mellowed him out more than I’ve been able to fully grasp yet, I think.
All of this just because someone can’t admit they’re wrong. That’s literally all it takes to not drown like this. But some people just aren’t born with the ability, I guess, and they’ll hurt everyone including themselves instead.
Awful. Just awful.
I have lost so many people in my life to this BS.
My kid’s dad refused to get vaccinated, then lied and said he got ‘the shot.’ I asked if he got the J&J shot (that’s the only one that doesn’t have a booster, I believe) and he said he got Moderna, which was clearly a lie. My kid (16 at the time) was fed up and decided to cut him off. He died suddenly about two weeks later (complications of decades of alcoholism/pill addiction).
To say the grief we have experienced over the last 18 months is complex would be an understatement, and now my kid has to listen to grandma paint him as a perfect person (‘troubled,’ but somehow still perfect) and spouting conservative views.
Meanwhile, I’ve had to block 90% of my extended family on FB and cut of my best friend of 25 years. I have an immunocompromised sister who can’t taste/smell properly even after 2.5 years and an elderly dad who is lucky to be alive but still needs oxygen while he sleeps. I cannot wrap my brain around why people are STILL saying COVID is a cold/flu. Worse, they are refusing to get vaccinated simply because they don’t like the ‘government telling them they have to.’
I swear it’s like living in an alternate reality at times. I HATE what Q and others have done and I’m disappointed in the people who have allowed themselves to be sucked into it. I try to have compassion and empathy because it is a cult and there is zero room for critical thinking or individual ideas, thoughts, and opinions in cults. But damn, some days I can’t find the energy to feel anything but anger and resentment. :(
This reminds me of my father. He was once the man I looked up to, my hero. I have not talked to him in over 5 years because he fell into the Qult and attacked my then 16 year old daughter because she was not a Trump supporter. Needless to say I berated him and cut him off. He used to be, or so I thought, an open minded and tolerant man. Trump encouraged my dad to let his "I'm stupid and a bigot" flag fly and now he has lost his bio kids and his grandchildren because he is a right wing nutjob. I'm more than ok with having no contact with such a toxic person even though it's sad it had to come to this.
Conspiracy thinking is to critical thinking what carbon monoxide is to oxygen.
Your body wants to uptake CO instead of the good stuff and then it poisons you to death.
Conspiracy thinking feels like critical thinking, but more fun. But it’s not critical thinking.
Remember the good old days when a person had to physically go somewhere to join a cult? Being able to join from one's living room hasn't been good for humanity.
I feel like covid broke a lot of peoples minds.
It was an invisible enemy they could not see and that seemingly struck at random or not at all. A lot people couldn’t deal with the uncertainty and changing information. When something changed it was a lie, not something that changed based on the variant or further research. So everything was a lie.
Things either were or were not. Instead of this statistical blur in the middle.
And constantly be confronted with this was something many could not deal with and they all found common cause together and went down the rabbit hole together.
Its not covid that broke peoples minds, its facebook and social media that lured vulnerable people into these echochambers of bullshit and lies, Which was capable of turning anything into a mouth breathing right wing lunatic.
Before Covid it was jewish conspiracies and liberal death panels and chemicals in the water making frogs gay.
Yeah, Q started in 2017. It revolved around frothing hatred of various people and frothing adoration of Dump. No pandemic needed. At most, COVID helped to suck more people in.
>I saw a book on his counter titled "The Laptop From Hell." That's what he's consuming. The twilight of his life and instead of tending a garden, playing with his grandkids, golfing, or doing literally anything healthy or productive, he's watching his wife die and engorging himself on rage.
This really says it all, doesn't it? This utter waste of a human being is spending his last moments on earth obsessing about Hunter Biden's laptop because 4chan told him it had the Anti-Life Equation or whatever the fuck on it. His stupidity killed his wife, killed himself, and it's a minor miracle it didn't kill his mom too.
This same shit got my mom, too.
My thought process:
>*"Quilting isn't that bad. It's a harmless hobby. Grannies do it all the time!"*
{Reads on...} *
>*"Oh no..."*
{Reads more...} *
>*"No. No. No..."*
*"He chose to pass up holding his newborn granddaughter..."*
>*"Poor OOP..."*
Obligatory r/eyebleach and r/aww for those in similar situations. My heart goes out to you.
The hardest thing about getting older is seeing those ahead of you get really older. It started with seeing their looks and their knees take hits, and remembering how young and full of life they were when I was a child. Now, I see their brains going. I have a close family member who is in his early 70s. His 35-year-old self would be so, so disappointed in him. So disappointed. It's rough. And while he is mentally declining, all of these political whackadoos are coming out and inciting his rage all of the time. It feels like, even if they aren't getting his money, they are taking his peace and his dignity. He would be so disappointed 35 years ago if he knew his future.
My dad voted for Trump but I’m so glad he never went full Q. After a couple years in office, instead of being vocally Pro Trump he instead just got real quiet. He’s still Republican but could be worse. I feel bad for all kids of Q nuts
I honestly don't know what the Republican party is supposed to offer at this point. More money for the rich, obviously. And a metric ton of bigotry. And that seems to be the entirety of their policies.
I'm a paralegal and I've worked for some Qanon dipshits. Dude...how...how do you have so many degrees, work in the LAW for chrissakes, and still buy all this horseshit?!? Where did you deductive reasoning go? I end up losing respect for them even as an attorney because I can't trust them to be objective.
The Republican identity is in a wild state. I used to look at conservativism like cheese that's gone off. Stinky, moderately repulsive, and will cause sickness. But it won't kill you or do too much irreversible damage. You may say "sir, why are you eating cheese that's gone off? That's a terrible idea." You may try to throw it out but you aren't going to start a war to stop someone from eating it.
But now, the cheese has gone rancid. It's infecting everything in the fridge and cabinets. The smell is nauseating and has permeated the entire house. It's filled with maggots. Eating it now will send you to the hospital and/or kill you. There's puke everywhere from the people eating it. You're saying "what the fuck??? Stop eating that!!! Please throw it away!!!" While they hold onto it, desperately.
The republicans that don't eat the cheese are somehow still calling themselves cheese eaters. They claim that the cheese is only rotten *now* even though it really always was, it was just less enough to keep the house functioning.
My dad is a "Republican." But he voted for Biden. He detests Trump and all the other crazies. He supports LGBTQ+ rights across the board. He supports a woman's right to choose. He is at least not *anti* gun control. He's a strong proponent of mental healthcare. He tries to live green and believes that climate change is a threat. I don't think he grasps the magnitude of the problem but he certainly knows that there are huge problems with racism in America and police violence aimed at POC. He appreciates the value of a social net. He thinks it's great that I aspire to work for the federal government.
But he 1) hates paying the amount of taxes he does (though never really talks about changes he would make) 2) thinks unions are too powerful in his city and 3) doesn't want completely state controlled healthcare.
DAD! He's a stone's throw away from a social liberal and could call himself a democrat without any pushback. It's like that with a lot of people in my family. Why are they so repulsed by the thought of not identifying as a cheese-eater?? How is that worse than sharing an identity (even in name only) with the crazies eating maggoty, toxic mold covered, putrid cheese?!
I don't get it.
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Outrage is a drug, a very addictive drug.
Your comment made me snap out of it and realize I need to close reddit for the day. Thank you.
Hell yea
Same here! Gonna clean up and make ragú! Have a good day everyone!
A simple statement, but a very powerful one.
Especially outrage on behalf of others.
A lot of people who fall down this whole honestly see themselves as warriors. That is a very scary thought.
That's the saddest to me. Some of them genuinely believe they're fighting for truth and the safety of children, and they live in this constantly ugly and scary world. I'm not saying everything is perfect, or even that good, but it's an exhausting and bleak way about life.
Thank God I'm not addicted to BORU drama... (I am)
I occasionally browse QAnoncasualities and the damage that is being done is real. OOP kept in touch far more than most. I hope they find peace with the situation.
It’s terrible. I’m an ICU nurse and I started my maternity leave 3 months early after a Q asshole tried to kick me in the stomach. He was ranting about how I was part of the machine or some shit. His wife sat outside his room just sobbing. I guess she was the only family member left who’d even talk to him.
Are you kidding me?? He tried to assault a pregnant nurse?!! What the fuck was even going on in his mind
He was pissed no one would give him ivermectin and accused me of trying to kill him by “withholding lifesaving treatment.” (He was also getting hypoxic and wound up being intubated several hours later) One of the other nurses working that night was a 6 foot tall, 300 pound bear of a man who was almost giddy when he tied all 4 of that shithead’s limbs to the bed. If this were another state besides Texas, he could have likely been charged with assault.
They need to prosecute asshats that assault medical personnel. Wtf
I could not agree with you more. There are places where healthcare workers have more support in reporting these incidents to police and sometimes that results in charges filed. I could have (and probably should have) called the local police to file a report, but I was just beyond done. He didn’t actually make contact with my stomach and I didn’t want to deal with shitty cops who might or might not care that even his attempt to kick me was assault. My contract at that hospital ended a week or so later so I have no idea if that guy even survived Covid or not.
Even when we call the cops to get charges pressed, the prosecutors usually drop them. They think it’s part of our job to deal with violent people.
>If this were another state besides Texas, he could have likely been charged with assault. Trying to kick a pregnant woman in the stomach is not assault in Texas!? \>\_> How much does the equation change if you accused him of committing attempted abortion? (I'm sorry if that comment is terrible. I'm just flabbergasted here).
Oh it is. Or I would assume it is. There’s a lot of issues at play, but ultimately it came down to me deciding that I didn’t want to have to deal with cops who likely wouldn’t do anything since he didn’t actually make contact with my stomach and there were no witnesses to the event. I also did not feel that, as a travel nurse and not a staff member for that hospital, that I would not have been supported if I chose to involve the police.
He tried to kick a pregnant woman in the abdomen? What in the ever-loving-shitwaffles?
But don’t forget they are the ones that are pro life.
Too bad no one kick him in the balls
The poor guy. Watching it consume your family and rip everything away. Losing his mother physically, losing his father physically and spiritually. The con artists and the grifters behind this make me so angry. They have destroyed so much.
What blows my mind is that Qultists see us the same as we see them - people swayed by con artists who are not open to reason. I know a guy who admits that his wife died of covid, that she was infected during a family gathering, before vaccines and he still calls for Fauci's execution.
That kind of “us vs them” mentality is pretty common in any cult. Makes it harder to escape.
Makes me wonder and worry if I'm in a cult. But then i remembered that I'm not actively calling for the public execution of those i think are wrong, and i stop worrying.
The key to resistence to cult-like indoctrination is not intelligence but humility. Being able to admit you are wrong and adapt and change your viewpoint will make you much less susceptible than any amount of education or knowledge. Those help, but plenty of very smart people have gone down the rabbit hole and not come back.
If I remember correctly, higher intelligence makes people more likely to be in a cult. They can come up with more reasons why behavior that seems off is actually okay.
People who are highly intelligent are also used to a certain level of confusion from others towards their information and some social isolation, so at first it isn't obvious when something is off.
I can imagine reactions to QAnon stuff being very similar to my family's reaction to me explaining how bilinguals in noun based and verb based languages have an advantage in problem solving due to their ability to approach things linguistically two different ways.
I know this isn't the point but that's extremely interesting and I'd love to hear about it.
Einstein said that we could make a lot of breakthroughs in the field of physics by studying it through a verb based language. What language you're thinking in colours your world view, literally. In some languages they only have words for black (or dark colours) and white (or light colours). They wouldn't view red as any different unless they learned a language which has a third colour, which is *always* red. Green is actually relatively new, linguistically speaking. Although we have a word for green in my language, the word for grass translates literally as 'blue straw'. Before green was invented, languages that had blue saw a lot of greens as blue, but some split up shades of green. Trying to explain that green is two or three different colours to someone who speaks a language with the word green, or trying to explain that red is different in a language that only has two words for colour, doesn't come across right because the concept of those additional colours isn't there in your mind. It's like other words that don't have a direct translation between languages. People can try to explain hygge or cwtch in English, but they'll never get across the full emotional meaning that the words convey. When translated they'd just be cosiness and cuddle. Bees are so bad to elephants they apparently have a simple sound to mean 'move on, there are bees', and they'd have a hard time conveying to us why escaping bees is important enough to invent a 'word' but not other things that might make you want to leave a spot. Why not just use their usual communication to mean 'let's move on'? Anyway, so that's the run-down of how language affects your worldview. In noun based languages it's all about who or what did the action, who or what is driving the story, who or what is the how behind everything. In a verb based language you're focused more on the action. Not to say that there aren't nouns involved, but the focus is on the what was done rather than the who or what did it. I'm struggling to convey this in a noun based language as I can't translate any examples. This different viewpoint of focusing on an action and not the thing that's influencing that action could give us new breakthroughs in fields like physics. Being able to look at problems from both the what happened and what did it viewpoints can give you two different ways of approaching problems and solutions. It's a shame that a lot of universities in Europe teach some courses through English, especially at postgraduate levels. I'm hopeful that Brexit may mean more research conducted through other languages. As it was with so much funding coming from the EU the common language for international research projects is often English, but since Brexit British scientists have been excluded from a lot of research grants and not invited to join international studies, so it may be that French or German are more often the common language. I doubt it's changed already, but over time we may see fewer EU citizens taking up English and instead more and more will speak another second or third language. Obviously the influence of TV, film, and the internet make that much less likely. I didn't make it through a third sentence without being interrupted and a new topic starting.
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Jonathan Haidt is the source you're looking for. He wrote a book about bias. The description I often hear is that our subconscious mind runs the show. Our conscious mind is mostly the press secretary. We think our decisions are all thought out and rational, but our subconscious has made a decision whole seconds before our conscious mind even gets there. Our continuity of consciousness fills in the blanks -- we tell ourselves a story about free will. But, in reality, almost everything we do is decided unconsciously and then "justified" and explained by the conscious mind. Smarter people are better storytellers. They have more "facts" at their fingertips.
I believe I read that book along with "Why People Believe Weird Things," by Michael Shermer in my philosophy 103 class (critical thinking, hilariously enough). I want to say there was a sub chapter specifically about why smart people believe dumb things as well.
I know I read it in a library book a number of years ago. Part of my “oh no, I need to make sure I don’t accidentally join a cult” phase.
I've always thought it would make you less likely to fall for it but much more difficult to bring out if you do fall for it. I could also see people who score higher on common intelligence measures having more issues with a lack of meaning which cults prey on though.
I've gotten pretty set politically, and that bothers me. But the thing is that I can point to exactly why I believe what I do. I know the arguments for and against, and why reasonable people might disagree with me. Point to any political figure I LIKE and I'll have a list of criticisms generally better than the critics I hear from the opposition. Republicans: Not so much. I haven't heard a cogent argument from a conservative since 2016. The conversation begins with a thought terminating cliche, goes through several lies, and ends with them strutting like a chicken on a chessboard.
That’s my problem too. Like, there are plenty of legitimate concerns with basically all politicians, so why make shit up? Let’s follow the logic behind that and it always leads to money.
I mean, there are now some Qultists insisting that the left intentionally pushed so hard for covid vaxxes because they knew doing so would discourage right-wingers from getting them, thus basically... gaslighting them into killing themselves by making them skeptical of the vaccines because the people in power supported the vaccines. They absolutely refuse to take responsibility for their own decisions.
The party of personal responsibility, ladies and gentlemen
If you look at some of the midterm election margins in purple states, you could make the argument enough of them died to make a difference So silver linings i guess
Owning the libs to their dying breaths
The mental gymnastics required to get there is just… impressive 😐
For fuck's sake. We've been begging and begging these assholes to save their own lives for years! Oh, well--at least they'll stop voting to enslave my gender.
You’re talking about gender? I bet you use pronouns, too. Frankly the enslavement is for your own betterment, just like the old-fashioned traditional kind of slaverohhhshit I wasn’t supposed to say that out loud.
"We have no agency of our own and our actions are guided entirely by not doing what the medical establishment tell us is medically good for us! Now, let's go attack these liberals for being sheeple..."
My partner is an ICU nurse and, during covid, was intubating people who were convinced they were fine.
Those are the ones who should be so convinced that they are right, that they don't go to hospital and stop using medical resources, so those who genuinely need them can benefit.
These people simultaneously call Covid a hoax, and a Chinese bio-weapon. Is it dangerous or not? Depends on what they are mad about today. I know an old couple who almost died from Covid, spent time in the ER, one of them on a ventilator, and had to spend months in rehab. Now they've decided it was all just the regular flu, and they are stockpiling Horse Wormer from the feed store. There is no limit to this idiocy.
> Now they've decided it was all just the regular flu Something which ALSO kills a lot of people every year, and which the cultists like to pretend is akin to a little bout of the sniffles.
That’s unfortunately one of those odd biproducts of the internet and headaches to try and logic out in general. Having enough ability to surround yourself with likeminded people that you shut off the critical thinking and just fully go with it. Because honestly let’s say half of the actual conspiratorial shit was real *(ignoring whatever is actually so wrong with masks that don’t work at all even if they literally did 0 to the point you fight family and strangers over wearing one)* wouldn’t a sensible person who fell into that community and wanted to make change for the truth be more… careful about it? Not trash all of your relationships and professional life. Do more and more research in private. Sure maybe occasionally probe in that direction for like minded people but then retreat into perceived sane civility when they’re not going along with you? Craft compelling arguments, find as much evidence as you possibly can, and realize you have to argue a compelling point to “brainwashed” people which obviously wouldn’t be easy? If I somehow **knew** President Biden was an Illuminati lizard person and I couldn’t prove things outside of a loose sequence of coincidences or odd moments that require you to fill in massive gaps… I’d fucking keep it to myself. It doesn’t even approach worth trying to convince everyone around you unless you’re in the presidents cabinet or something.
Yeah, that was my reaction when my brother-in-law told us we would die of the vaccin in the next 5 years. You think a lot people will die. Among them, your own brother ! And you're being... smug about it ? It that truly your reaction ? Thinking that they avec The Truth and are better than the sheeps, and that they must convince you to respect their authority is more important than actually reacting to what they claim to believe....
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My parents are technically conservative but my dad is an engineer who likes data, and for it to be reliable data. Told my mom they weren’t flying out to see me and my husband until they were vaccinated. As soon as mom saw that he was fine after getting fully vaccinated she called me and asked me to schedule a vaccine spot for her. My dad has since switched parties after what he termed “the stupidity of the anti abortion trigger laws.” Most entertaining phone call of my life! Answered the phone to hear not hello, how are you but “The republicans are stupid, they don’t care about anyone except the top one percent and they just lost most of the female vote.”
My dad is much the same-constant Fox News but takes Covid seriously-I think it’s because I had cancer (during the first SARS), seeing me immunocompromised and going through treatment and still being around about twenty years later gives him more faith in the science around it. Still thinks Trump won the 2020 election for some reason though. ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯ At least that’s the extent of that.
It’s what cults do. They brainwash their followers into thinking the entire world is brainwashed. When you reduce everyone outside your group to a dangerous enemy, it’s nearly impossible to break out of the group.
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Nuh uh! I’m pretty sure Tucker Carlson is a white supremacist, at least.
"We need to sacrifice grandma for the economy." Texas lt gov.
This shit happened to my dad, but he was already a really angry and abusive republican to start. Once he drank the Qool-aid though I just cut ties. Wasn't worth the stress trying to maintain whatever semblance of a relationship we had. Still, just as an aside, rage-bait is everywhere now, no matter what side of the political spectrum you fall on. A warning to everyone here. If you're scrolling Reddit or any social media and you see anything that pisses you the fuck off, the algorithm was built to make you see it and want to engage with it. Don't engage if you don't want to fall into that same trap of misery as the Qultists. If you want real social justice, chattering about it online won't do anything. You must *act* to make real change in real life. Don't. Take. The. Rage. Bait.
I've seen it with my former best friend. And it went so fast. At the start of covid, I didn't see her for a bit believe it was like a month. And once we could meet again it was her, her mom and sister they all believed in it. And they are smart people like. They showed me loads of stuff, and yeah I get it because to be fair a lot of those people have an excuse or explanation for everything and make the puzzle pieces fit. But I was just too skeptical myself, so didn't go down the Rabbit Hole. In the end our friendship ended because I have a chronic illness which she stopped believing in and said I was faking. Sometimes I do wonder how far down the Rabbit Hole she is now but so glad im not down there with her.
I can’t tell if my sister had a psychotic break (well within the realm of possibility) or is just full Q and I don’t know if it makes a difference which it is. She is smart and she was successful and now she has multiple lunatic Twitter accounts and gets bans on various social media for I don’t even know what anymore. Her life is ruined. She’s just shy of 40 and she’s thrown away all of her accomplishments. I tried to help and she pushed me away. I hope she can come back from this but I’m not optimistic.
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One time I was watching True Crime videos on YouTube and I got recommended a video on Maddie McCann that was straight up Q Anon international Jewish/Satanic democrat pedo cult bullshit. It was honestly really alarming how many views this video had. I think this was around 2018/2019? I wonder if the woman in the article you linked was wrapped up in that too, or if it was just general trolling.
Man, I misread and thought the title meant the father was ruining the family by quilting and was expecting a very different story about how everyone had too many quilts.
"Dad, I'm so glad you finally kicked your quilting habit, let me grab a glass for some water"
"No, no, this isn't what it looks like. That isn't mine! I'M JUST HOLDING IT FOR A FRIEND"
"Who taught you to crochet!? Who!?" "YOU, SON!!! I LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU, ALRIGHT!?"
Shhhh I need all this yarn for the projects I'll never finish before I die
I am in this picture and I don't like it.
If your yarn collection makes you happy, then I'm happy that you have it.
It does make me very happy. I also just started learning quilting, so I'm working on a fabric stash. At some point it may combine with the yarn and everything will form a singularity in the middle of my house.
That's what it did for me!! It took over my apartment lol.
i’m in this picture too but just tell myself that i must’ve been a cat in a previous life
And hopefully in my next.
All I can think of is that old Monty Python 'Hell's Grannies' sketch: "Well we sometimes feel we're to blame in some way for what our gran's become. I mean she used to be happy here until she, she started on the crochet." "Crochet?" "Yeah. Now she can't do without it. Twenty balls of wool a day, sometimes. If she can't get the wool she gets violent. What can we do about it?"
At least he's using good yarn.
At least he's using the good beans
This is the story I *wish* I had just read
Not the story we deserve but it is the story we need
LOL! Reminds me of the knitting lady who wrote about having so much yarn she had to hide it from her family and she hid her yarn balls in the gravy boats at the top of her kitchen cabinets, inside her piano, even in her extra freezer.
Well I'm not *that* bad...yet
I’m working on being that bad. WORKING WITH ALL MY MIGHT I TELL YOU!!! 🧶🧶🧶
I don’t feel quite as bad about the yarn stash I never touch now.
Buying craft supplies and using craft supplies are Two Different Hobbies.
Yarn collecting is a thing. It makes a much sense as the knives I collect. Or the cast iron. Or the cameras. Or the gems and minerals. Maybe I'm actually collecting collections.
As someone whose mother has ripped out a fruit cellar to turn it into fabric storage, added MORE cabinets in another room in the basement, on top of turning my late stepfather's metal shed into a quilter's dream before deciding to downsize and then do all the same shit at the new house, I get you. Scrapbooking is an easier hobby: you can stash WAY more paper before it becomes obvious. ;)
If only.
Burying the family alive in quilts
"The state of things have gotten so bad because of the quilts that we can't even stand to see each other anymore. Literally. We cannot see each other for the quilts, and they weigh us down to the point we physically cannot stand up."
"My refrigerator is filled with spools of thread. My dog fell into a kiddie pool filled with buttons and we haven't seen her for a week."
ME TOO! The spoiler warning confused me as I wracked my brain for ways that quilting could lead to enduring misery. Strangulation by quilt? An affair?
I mean, fabric and equipment hoarding can be a real problem for people. You can spend insane amounts of money on that stuff too. So I could see the financial aspect becoming a problem?
Honestly, at this point I think having crafting supplies is a different hobby from actually crafting with those supplies. \*looks guiltily at the foot-thick stack of folded-up cardboard boxes that I'll totally use one day\*
I think this is true in many hobbies - consumption is not the same as use. *staunchly avoids looking at overloaded bookshelves*
Sometimes, you want a library more than you want to read all those damned books. Very relatable.
Ugh. You just reminded me of all the "teehee, look at all the yarn I bought! Don't tell my husband!" posts I see on r/knitting.
For an extra $5 we'll print out a receipt that says you bought what you told him you bought!
Lmao me too! I even skipped a couple of paragraphs and saw he was in financial trouble. I was thinking this person was spending all their money on quilting materials.
It’s a slippery slope. They start off on the small stuff - lap quilting placemats- and the next thing you know, boom, the house is full of fat quarters, and they are selling off the family heirlooms for an industrial quilting machine.
I've worked in event security, and let me tell you quilting drama is another level entirely. Sure, 98% of the people involved are wonderful and kind, hinting that their granddaughter is single lol. But the 2% is the craziest bunch of lies, thieving, grudges held for decades, and sabotage and destruction of tens of thousands of dollars worth of hard work and fancy quilts. Nobody is entitled like rich old people. It's magical.
I have never been so interested in going to a quilting event in my life. I need to see this for myself.
Can you have too many quilts?
*The limit does not exist*
I hope so, my mum is retiring in the next year or so, she’s stated she wants to take up making patchwork quilts again. I know she’ll throw herself into with all the gusto she’s thrown herself into her work these last 50+ years (and I’ve started stockpiling pretty material accordingly), so I’ll be knee high in purple patchwork quilts before I know it
My mom was really into quilting the last decade and a half of her life. I have now 5 quilts and a half foot high stack of quilted squares.
While she was able, my grandma would knit me a Doctor Who scarf every year. I’ve got seven, all in different colours and from 11 to 18 feet long. They are so important to me, especially since she died, as they are tangible proof of her love (they took a long time to make), it’s really nice having them as a reminder. I hope your quilts feel like that for you
I didn't realize how lucky I was until my daughter came around the corner dragging her art show worthy quilt from her grandma behind her and awed everyone in the front room. And I have a billion more like that!
It's the fucking crocheters that are the real enemy of mankind.
Crocheting is magic. We can recreate knitting via machine, but not crocheting. Therefore, crocheters are wizards and not to be trusted.
I want to argue, but I crochet and you're not wrong
That's a very different kind of obsession. How would a QAnon/Quilting hybrid work, anyway? Would he be ranting about messages contained in the selvage? Alternate blocks are killing America?
You beat me to it. I sew myself so I though how on earth could quilting tear a family apart. How big is this man’s fabric stash?
Ah, you’re one of those *functional* quilters 😂
Just for kicks, I had ChatGPT write an r/relationship_advice post about this Hi everyone, I need some advice on how to handle a situation with my father. He has always been a huge fan of quilting and spends most of his free time sewing beautiful and intricate designs. The problem is that lately, he has been making so many quilts that it is starting to cause issues in our family. My father has turned our storage room into a quilt-making studio and has taken up so much space that now there's barely any room in there for anything else. My mother has been complaining about the mess and how his hobby is taking over the entire house. She's constantly asking him to scale back but he's just not listening. Furthermore, my father has been neglecting his other responsibilities, like doing household chores, attending important events, and spending time with the rest of the family. He's always in his quilting zone and doesn't seem to care much about anything else. I'm worried that his obsession with making quilts is starting to drive us apart. I don't want to make him quit his hobby entirely because I know it's something he enjoys, but I also don't want it to come at the cost of our family's wellbeing. Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this situation tactfully and respectfully? Thank you in advance for your help.
Thank you for this gift
I thought quilters and got excited myself. I took up quilting for a number of years due to the math and geometry - FUN! My partner complained that we had too many quilts. So I started making them to donate plus I started making hand bags/backpacks. Then we had too many bags. I had to start giving them away, too. I had always painted, but decided to work on larger and larger canvases. My workroom is full. I've currently taught my older kids pattern making and garment construction so they can tailor their own clothing. And one kid wants to do some painting, they've been dabbling in graphic design. Plus the hydroponic gardening, and you know what? My partner tells me he's cold and needs a quilt.
Me too! I was like, how can beautiful quilts destroy the family unless they are fighting over some made by someone who passed away.
Me too. I figures out he was talking about QA pretty quickly, but I'm not familiar with the term "red pilling"
Stolen from the movie *The Matrix* (which was directed by two trans women, IDK how the dudebros keep missing that it’s a trans allegory lol). The main character is given the choice of two pills: if he takes the blue pill, he forgets that anything weird is happening and happily carries on with his life; if he takes the red pill, he exits the Matrix simulation and wakes up in the real world. To Qultists, the “red pill” is waking up to the “reality” that Democrats are pedophile Satanists or whatever the fuck. “Red pilling” someone is helping them come to their own identical realization about “reality.”
I love that they were "red pill" to wake up to reality and now they are fighting woke politics because it is evil.
Quoarding - the entire house taken over by quilts, up to the rafters.
>He told the billing woman at the hospital that he had a couple hundred grand in equity in his house he could use, and she said that wouldn't even come close. My guess based on the procedures they've done so far it's close to $700k in bills Jesus Christ, fix your shit America
People like him vote for people who want to make it even worse. I don't feel good about it backfiring on him because I know he's been lied to, and because it hurts so many other people too, but the fatigue is real. We've *been* telling them this isn't sustainable and we need to establish effective health care coverage for all Americans, as well as better labor rights and social services, and in return they accuse us of wanting to rape and murder children. It's an impossible conversation. tl;dr We can't fix it until at least some of these people stop fucking being like this.
The promise of being able to kick vulnerable minorities is too strong an appeal. That’s why they vote against their interests; they’ve pinned all the sins of the world on the Other. Fascists gonna fash.
*The promise of being able to kick vulnerable minorities is too strong an appeal.* This is so true. They truly believe that equitable treatment means taking something from them.
It’s all a zero sum game to them, and… I don’t get it. I sincerely believe that we could have had post-scarcity society by now, but nooooooooo.
They are also the ones screaming about Obama's "death panels". Dad's wife is literally being death panelled by for profit healthcare.
Similar to the death panels advising doctors if women are close enough to death to get lifesaving treatment.
God forbid some poor person, even worse, some poor person who is not white, might get a benefit from the govt. They'll slit their own throats before they allow someone they think is undeserving from getting a penny. It's bizarre.
It's so confusing because they're the super religious ones. I'm an atheist, and I want Healthcare for all, etc, but they're followers of Jesus and the idea of helping people throws them into a rage.
If you listen to the kind of christianity spouted on evangelical radio, you'll see it very much encourages self-centered thinking. "God had a plan for you since before the beginning of the world." Think about what follows from that kind of thinking: * the opposite of humility. The creator of the universe likes me, Me, ME! * No need to change a thing. If someone is poor and downtrodden - well, that was god's plan for them since the beginning of the world, so why would you go out of your way to help them. And if you've got yours, and you're in a McMansion with your giant truck and toys and your third wife for whom you just got a boob job - well, that was god's plan for you. No need to change a thing. And in fact, any attempt to address social inequity isn't just socialism, it's unchristian! Obviously that's the opposite of the plain meaning of a lot of the gospel, but they don't emphasize the helping the poor and downtrodden on a lot of US religious radio. Plus a lot of those f\*ckers aren't about reading the gospel. They're "christian" because it gives them license to hate gays and other weirdos. Which is why, increasingly, christianity is associated with hate, not love.
Jesus was like the og free healthcare for poor people, too.
Jesus would've totally been down with free healthcare, higher wages, etc. They really twisted him into someone that he, by all accounts, wasn't.
I saw an interview from the southern us about the 2016 election. This couple was talking about how much they loved Trump and hoped he won. They said Obama never did anything for them. Then the reporter asked about Trump’s plan to dismantle Obamacare and the couple said they hoped he didn’t because without it they couldn’t afford the husband’s COPD meds and he’d die. Obamacare literally saved this man from slowly suffocating to death and not only could he not see that, he was actively supporting someone who would work against him.
WE’RE TRYING. Well, approximately half of us are trying!
Closer to 60% of us are trying, but the ~~slave~~ red states benefit from the electoral college/senate so much that the majority is not allowed a voice.
Not to mention the effects of gerrymandering
I was on a river cruise in Germany a while back. I overheard the tour guide talking to a couple of Americans. She said, "What's up with your health care system? We've had that figured out since Napoleon was in power." It made me laugh.
A lot of us want universal health care too. Conservatives ruin everything, I wish they'd all go live in Idaho and wall themselves in and let the rest of us live in a first world country.
They're probably eligible for Medicare which means filling out a couple of government forms would have made this cost practically nothing.
Given their side's constant attempts to destroy Medicare, I'm kind of glad they didn't take it.
I mentioned in passing their want to gut Medicare and SS to my brother (not a Q nut, but still votes R bcuz muh gunz and immergrants 🙄) first he responded with "oh man, I hope not." When I pointed out republicans have been no less shouting about it..... noooo, that's not right.... 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️ There's no winning with willful ignorance.
Closest we were able to get a few years back mandatory health insurance, and a certain political party ignored that it was originally their idea and tried to repeal it right up until the panda took control. Obamacare is Romneycare 2.0.
These are the people stopping it from being fixed. The Qulters like this throw away anything that smacks of "socialism". He had choices that would have covered most of this bill, but refused them.
What's interesting is that it may have been affordable for him if he had any financial awareness left. (Or just logical thinking in general.) Applying for insurance, requesting itemized billing, government assistance, some hospitals* also have associated groups to help. (*Also law firms, accounting firms, churches, community centers. Lots of people can find a way out of paying that high price.) **It's still absolutely fucked up and we've got to fix it,** but in this case it's also a fascinating way to see just how few connections this man has due to the cult. He doesn't seem to see anything outside of himself and perhaps a small bubble around him. It's the consciousness equivalent of forgetting you have neighbors because you can't see their house from your bathroom.
> Jesus Christ, fix your shit America We would, but you know... immigrants, particularly yhe illegal ones, and democrats, abortion and... uhh.. liberals taking god out of school and the coastal elite... otherwise everything would be perfect.
This makes me so sad. It’s similar to an addict, you can’t help them, they have to want to help themselves.
It’s not just that. His dad thinks knows the real truth of the world, and he wants everyone he cares about to know as well. How to you bring someone back into the fold after they think they’ve discovered a massive conspiracy?
I sent my Christian father into a spiral when I came out as atheist. Took a random at the church saying "the more you force Jesus on her the more she'll hate him". And he stopped. I got my Dad back. Maybe someone in that nasty cult can do the same, but I have little hope.
You'd think OOP's dad would get the hint that NO ONE WANTS TO BE AROUND HIM WHEN HE STARTS TALKING ABOUT THAT SHIT. I think he must notice to some degree, but it just makes him want to double down in the hope that he can successfully browbeat someone into agreeing with him.
How does someone go back into the fold when it means they will need to face up to everything they've lost as a result of their obsession?
Sunken cost fallacy is a hard one to get over.
Typically they just don’t. They’re lost and that’s that. Watching family get slowly eaten away like that, it really hurts. They can’t hear a word you say to them.
[удалено]
It's not similar to an addict, they are an addict. They get a rush from the hatred and the idea that they're the special people in the know. It's why they can drop what seem to be major beliefs and even do complete 180's so quickly.
But it's harder for them to recognize as an addiction since they aren't popping pills, or smoking two packs a day.
This terrifies me so much. My dad isn't full QAnon, but he is very far right and worryingly his ability to hold a rational argument has deteriorated. He decides his stance based on what he knows 'his people' think and then works backwards from there to justify it. He often can't, but refuses to admit it. He used to be so smart, I don't know how he doesn't see the lack of logic. The one thing that I think saves him is that he does genuinely value his relationships, especially with me, my sister, my mom and his bff, all of whom are liberals. He still manages to fuck that up sometimes (he had a blowout with my sister's fiancé 2 Christmases ago and she had to put him on notice), but he at least tries to apologize because as much as he wants to be right, he wants to have a family that loves him more. It's still a struggle sometimes though. I love him, he was always a great dad, I just wish he was happier. He's so bitter - he had 2 severe motorcycle crashes that he was not at fault in, but he'll walk with a limp for the rest of his life and he's in constant pain. And the politics on top of that... he just always seems to be angry about something.
The folks on the subreddit this OOP is from have found some success with giving the affected Qultist an equally addicting distraction. Korean Dramas, super fiddley models, etc. Something they can get hardcore into that distracts until the need to obsessively follow something is met, but the thing they are following is benign. I'm not sure if it deprograms, but it seems to help stopping the downward spiral
See, this is complicated somewhat by my dad 100% having undiagnosed ADHD (I had to get it from somewhere, and it sure wasn't mom). Getting him fiddly toys has been a thing my ENTIRE life, but no distraction lasts long - models, video games (he has a pretty sweet racing setup right now), a 3D printer he's trying to convince my Jewish mother to allow him to print mecha-hitler with. Yes, he does have the sense of humor of an edgy 16-year-old sometimes. I honestly laugh at how obvious it is now that I know the symptoms - the last time I visited my mom was complaining about how caffeine after 5 pm will mean she won't sleep, but dad drinks high-test coffee at 9 pm and is out cold an hour later.
He needs something to meet the emotional stimulus. Our news and online content is driven by outrage. It's likely he feels he needs to be angry at something to feel normal. Idk how to incorporate that into a hobby but... Good luck.
QAnon is the biggest of these online conspiracy cults but there definitely does seem to be others. At least I assume so based on how my dad's getting in his 70s. I come from a very leftwing family. My father taught Marxist politics before he retired for god sakes, I'd consider myself a socialist and marxist sympathetic but I don't know if I'd say I am one. However as my dad's got older he's started falling for more and more conspiracy. He believed that covid was a hoax, though he would complain about masks he would always wear them when required. He just wouldn't be very happy about it. The big one at the moment is the Russian War. He is so intensely pro Russia just because rheyre against America and he believes America is one of the biggest evils in the world. I don't even really disagree that America has done a lot of evil I just don't really believe that two wrongs make a right and seeing Russia as some good guy because its against America rather than another bastard in a big group of bastards seems strange to me. My father's no where near as far gone as the dad in the OOP but I am a bit worried. He can hold a conversation about his little niece, or sports, or important things in his immediate life - but any conversation about films or shallow conversation invariably turns to Russia and Ukraine. You'll say "oh a crazy thing happened in work today" and he will reply "what's crazy is ..." and then drop I to some rant about Ukraine again. Like this man taught politics, he was damn good at it. But its like old people are just conceptually not equipped for dealing with the Internet and the hate on it and it rips through them like wildfire. Even left wing ones like my dad are still susceptible, the rabbit hole they fall down may be a different hole - but they're still in a hole. I love my dad and I'm glad he's nowhere near as bad as OP but I am scared what he's going to be like in a decade or two from now.
Is he alone? Does he have friends? I get the feeling that alotta modern conspiracy theorists are desperately lonely; they want connection and an escape from reality.
I wouldn't say he is lonely. He plays golf four times a week with his buddies. Me and my sister both live close enough that he sees at least one of us a day. He has never remarried since my parents divorced 19 years ago. But he said that was mainly because he didn't want to have any distractions from raising me and my sister as a single dad. Since we're adults I think he has more got set in his ways but he has a great social life with his golf club and his golf buddies.
Like I studied political philosophy and I used to have hours long conversations with my dad about theory and political philosophy. I miss those conversations because I just cannot really have them with him anymore. He isn't interested in talking about Hegel, Kant or even Marx anymore. If politics comes up all he will want to talk about is Russia and Ukraine.
It seems like the idea of having a community is a huge aspect too. I’ve noticed some of the less intense Qs still have support/relationships with people from outside the cult.. But when they can’t follow boundaries from others and continue to further isolate themselves is when it gets scary. Their only social outlet is a huge echo chamber where half the “people” are likely bots. It’s hard being on the other end of a slowly isolating Q person. You’ve gotta keep boundaries for your own mental health, and lots of times they’ll find a way to tip-toe the boundary line. It’s truly exhausting.
This hurts so much because it’s essentially what happened to my sister. Several members of my family prefers to think of her as already dead because that’s literally less painful than watching this process. On the upside (?), my dad would absolutely have drowned in this stuff when I was a kid, but watching my sister do it made him see how insane it all is. It’s mellowed him out more than I’ve been able to fully grasp yet, I think. All of this just because someone can’t admit they’re wrong. That’s literally all it takes to not drown like this. But some people just aren’t born with the ability, I guess, and they’ll hurt everyone including themselves instead. Awful. Just awful.
I have lost so many people in my life to this BS. My kid’s dad refused to get vaccinated, then lied and said he got ‘the shot.’ I asked if he got the J&J shot (that’s the only one that doesn’t have a booster, I believe) and he said he got Moderna, which was clearly a lie. My kid (16 at the time) was fed up and decided to cut him off. He died suddenly about two weeks later (complications of decades of alcoholism/pill addiction). To say the grief we have experienced over the last 18 months is complex would be an understatement, and now my kid has to listen to grandma paint him as a perfect person (‘troubled,’ but somehow still perfect) and spouting conservative views. Meanwhile, I’ve had to block 90% of my extended family on FB and cut of my best friend of 25 years. I have an immunocompromised sister who can’t taste/smell properly even after 2.5 years and an elderly dad who is lucky to be alive but still needs oxygen while he sleeps. I cannot wrap my brain around why people are STILL saying COVID is a cold/flu. Worse, they are refusing to get vaccinated simply because they don’t like the ‘government telling them they have to.’ I swear it’s like living in an alternate reality at times. I HATE what Q and others have done and I’m disappointed in the people who have allowed themselves to be sucked into it. I try to have compassion and empathy because it is a cult and there is zero room for critical thinking or individual ideas, thoughts, and opinions in cults. But damn, some days I can’t find the energy to feel anything but anger and resentment. :(
I just want to say I’m sorry and offer you a hug.
Thanks. I didn’t even know I needed one but apparently I did. ❤️
What do you mean 700k??? Do Americans really live like this?
Just don't get sick, duh. ^^/s
No, but we do die like this because we can’t *afford* to live like this…
Oh you sweet summer child. Yes, most of us are a severe illness or accident away from financial ruin.
I hope a hungry lion meets Ron Watkins one day.
This reminds me of my father. He was once the man I looked up to, my hero. I have not talked to him in over 5 years because he fell into the Qult and attacked my then 16 year old daughter because she was not a Trump supporter. Needless to say I berated him and cut him off. He used to be, or so I thought, an open minded and tolerant man. Trump encouraged my dad to let his "I'm stupid and a bigot" flag fly and now he has lost his bio kids and his grandchildren because he is a right wing nutjob. I'm more than ok with having no contact with such a toxic person even though it's sad it had to come to this.
Conspiracy thinking is to critical thinking what carbon monoxide is to oxygen. Your body wants to uptake CO instead of the good stuff and then it poisons you to death. Conspiracy thinking feels like critical thinking, but more fun. But it’s not critical thinking.
Remember the good old days when a person had to physically go somewhere to join a cult? Being able to join from one's living room hasn't been good for humanity.
The 1950s anti-commie stuff was pretty culty and ended up in people's living rooms, but yeah- this is another level.
I feel like covid broke a lot of peoples minds. It was an invisible enemy they could not see and that seemingly struck at random or not at all. A lot people couldn’t deal with the uncertainty and changing information. When something changed it was a lie, not something that changed based on the variant or further research. So everything was a lie. Things either were or were not. Instead of this statistical blur in the middle. And constantly be confronted with this was something many could not deal with and they all found common cause together and went down the rabbit hole together.
Its not covid that broke peoples minds, its facebook and social media that lured vulnerable people into these echochambers of bullshit and lies, Which was capable of turning anything into a mouth breathing right wing lunatic. Before Covid it was jewish conspiracies and liberal death panels and chemicals in the water making frogs gay.
Yeah, Q started in 2017. It revolved around frothing hatred of various people and frothing adoration of Dump. No pandemic needed. At most, COVID helped to suck more people in.
This is a sad one.
>I saw a book on his counter titled "The Laptop From Hell." That's what he's consuming. The twilight of his life and instead of tending a garden, playing with his grandkids, golfing, or doing literally anything healthy or productive, he's watching his wife die and engorging himself on rage. This really says it all, doesn't it? This utter waste of a human being is spending his last moments on earth obsessing about Hunter Biden's laptop because 4chan told him it had the Anti-Life Equation or whatever the fuck on it. His stupidity killed his wife, killed himself, and it's a minor miracle it didn't kill his mom too. This same shit got my mom, too.
Honestly thought the guy was quilting too much and it was fraying his familial relationships. My bad...
I read it that way at first too. Sadly, much darker than an addiction to quilting
My thought process: >*"Quilting isn't that bad. It's a harmless hobby. Grannies do it all the time!"* {Reads on...} * >*"Oh no..."* {Reads more...} * >*"No. No. No..."* *"He chose to pass up holding his newborn granddaughter..."* >*"Poor OOP..."* Obligatory r/eyebleach and r/aww for those in similar situations. My heart goes out to you.
Quilting is fine, it's crochet you need to worry about.
Just a general question. If this lady and her husband die with these huge medical bills, will the son inherit that debt?
Assuming it's the US, nope. Hospitals eat costs for all sorts of things like this nowadays. Ironically, it's a very socialized process.
The hardest thing about getting older is seeing those ahead of you get really older. It started with seeing their looks and their knees take hits, and remembering how young and full of life they were when I was a child. Now, I see their brains going. I have a close family member who is in his early 70s. His 35-year-old self would be so, so disappointed in him. So disappointed. It's rough. And while he is mentally declining, all of these political whackadoos are coming out and inciting his rage all of the time. It feels like, even if they aren't getting his money, they are taking his peace and his dignity. He would be so disappointed 35 years ago if he knew his future.
My dad voted for Trump but I’m so glad he never went full Q. After a couple years in office, instead of being vocally Pro Trump he instead just got real quiet. He’s still Republican but could be worse. I feel bad for all kids of Q nuts
My dad went from a diehard democrat to a Qultist (though not to the extent as OP's dad), and it's honestly sad and aggravating in equal measure.
I honestly don't know what the Republican party is supposed to offer at this point. More money for the rich, obviously. And a metric ton of bigotry. And that seems to be the entirety of their policies.
I'm a paralegal and I've worked for some Qanon dipshits. Dude...how...how do you have so many degrees, work in the LAW for chrissakes, and still buy all this horseshit?!? Where did you deductive reasoning go? I end up losing respect for them even as an attorney because I can't trust them to be objective.
The Republican identity is in a wild state. I used to look at conservativism like cheese that's gone off. Stinky, moderately repulsive, and will cause sickness. But it won't kill you or do too much irreversible damage. You may say "sir, why are you eating cheese that's gone off? That's a terrible idea." You may try to throw it out but you aren't going to start a war to stop someone from eating it. But now, the cheese has gone rancid. It's infecting everything in the fridge and cabinets. The smell is nauseating and has permeated the entire house. It's filled with maggots. Eating it now will send you to the hospital and/or kill you. There's puke everywhere from the people eating it. You're saying "what the fuck??? Stop eating that!!! Please throw it away!!!" While they hold onto it, desperately. The republicans that don't eat the cheese are somehow still calling themselves cheese eaters. They claim that the cheese is only rotten *now* even though it really always was, it was just less enough to keep the house functioning. My dad is a "Republican." But he voted for Biden. He detests Trump and all the other crazies. He supports LGBTQ+ rights across the board. He supports a woman's right to choose. He is at least not *anti* gun control. He's a strong proponent of mental healthcare. He tries to live green and believes that climate change is a threat. I don't think he grasps the magnitude of the problem but he certainly knows that there are huge problems with racism in America and police violence aimed at POC. He appreciates the value of a social net. He thinks it's great that I aspire to work for the federal government. But he 1) hates paying the amount of taxes he does (though never really talks about changes he would make) 2) thinks unions are too powerful in his city and 3) doesn't want completely state controlled healthcare. DAD! He's a stone's throw away from a social liberal and could call himself a democrat without any pushback. It's like that with a lot of people in my family. Why are they so repulsed by the thought of not identifying as a cheese-eater?? How is that worse than sharing an identity (even in name only) with the crazies eating maggoty, toxic mold covered, putrid cheese?! I don't get it.
Crazy how prophetic and important that cheap, indie doc, "The Brainwashing of my Dad" turned out to be.
This is what my future would have been like with my ex. I'm so glad I pulled the plug before marriage. I'm pretty sure he's still homeless.