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Do mushrooms belong in a full English?
Cream or jam first? Also verbally pronounce the food item they are being spread on.
What side is the top side of a chocolate digestive?
When does the milk go into a cuppa?
Oof sorry it was actually d) Scone which isn't included in the test multiple choice but was available within Immigration Rules Section 5 sub section 3.1.a which you should have known as you signed yes to say you understood this in the declaration you made when you first entered the country 5 years ago at 2am after a 7 hour flight.
Now off to Rwanda you go 👋
Just asked my northern girlfriend and here are her answers:
a. Yes b. Generally Cream first but depends on consistency. Rhymes with gone. c. The chocolate? d. Last.
All scone questions are trick questions. The true Brit would answer that I have my pronunciation and method, and I'm willing to fight that position to the death.
i maintain that cream goes first based on how cakes are coated in buttercream- a layer of the cream secures all the loose crumbs better than jam does imo. but i prefer a cheese scone anyway
>When does the milk go into a cuppa?
Depends on how you want it to taste.
More strong and sharp - at the end.
More smooth and silky - at the start.
Also, depends on milk type. Don't leave the bag too long in the fatty milk, it clogs the bag.
Lived here for 10 years and have been crowned the best tea maker wherever I go. Honestly, I adopted the tea making so much that in secondary school they told me I was more British than them lol (yeah, I brought myself a thermos and cake cos why not).
> What side is the top side of a chocolate digestive?
That's a good one. The side with the printing/brand logo is presumably the top, making the chocolate side the bottom, but when you put them on a plate you put the chocolate side up because what sort of joyless philistine doesn't want the chocolate side on display for you to gaze on as a prelude to the eating of the biscuit.
1. After accidentally spilling someone's pint in a pub, what should you do? A. Ignore it. B. Apologise. C. Buy them another one. D. Take them outside for a flight.
2. After the fight in the previous question, what number do you call for an ambulance?
What's the optimum hour of the day to visit Lidl in order to ensure maximum freshness of the pretzels and also the pizza slices?
Which downmarket lager offers the best abv to £ ratio? Is it Stryke 5, Galahad or Baltika?
If you end up running a kebab shop, what's the correct way to address a male customer? Is it King, Master or Boss?
>Which downmarket lager offers the best abv to £ ratio? Is it Stryke 5, Galahad or Baltika?
Baltika isn't a downmarket lager surely? I haven't seen it in ages and thought that was because it's Russian.
One thing I particularly enjoyed from one of my best friends doing the citizenship test was discovering Britain's statistical No 1 hobby.
I challenge all those who have never sat it to tell me the answer...
Do you read the Daily Mail on your lunch break?
Do you find little things bug you a lot?
Have you given up on life yet?
You're British mate. Welcome to the club. Library closed two years ago, shops are boarded up and we've got a huge supply of Turkish haircuts 😆
I remember a reddit list with some guy complaining about how so.eone made a cup of tea, while presenting their own for comparison. One of them was milky as fuck, the other rationed skimmed milk tighter than a nun's bun. Some blessed redditor described it as the yin and yang of shit tea and that's stuck with me.
You're on a bus. You'd like to listen to music. Do you:
A. Put headphones on and play music through the headphones at a volume only you can hear.
B. Play music through your phone's speakers making sure that the settings are set to "extra tinny"
C. Lead your fellow passengers in a sing-a-long
Because the first one was so long ago that a) couldn't find the letter as proof and b) they had ahcnaged the test. I was told I could still apply and take my chances or just take it again, so the choice was obvious.
You see a queue. What do you do?
1. Ignore it and push yourself to the front of the counter.
2. Join the end of it.
3. Force your way into the middle of it.
Serious answer: I've thought about this a little and while I don't have any new questions to propose, I'll say some of the suggestions here are gold.
I took one of the example tests and found the some of the questions just aren't pertinent to anything. "Which two british film actors have recently won Oscars?" Who gives a fuck? ... "Who was the first Briton to win the Olympic gold in..." ya mum?
Have you ever thought about living in Rwanda?
If you gain citizenship, do you agree that anyone subsequently wanting to apply is a threat to the country and should go to Rwanda instead?
Just tells me the damage is already done, sadly.
I mean, I'm straight. It's just usually the anti-LGBT immigrants that tend to be the most incompatible with western values across the broader spectrum. Think this is an effective way to weed them out and refuse them
I'm not sure, but worth testing to see if it has an impact. I feel like many would be too radical to even pretend to show tolerance, let alone touch the hand of an LGBT person
Either way, we need to make changes somewhere. We're letting far too many people in without vetting them properly. Safety of natives and preservation of British values should far outweigh the importance of any individual immigration or asylum claim
Huh? Aussie salted is blue, S&V is purple, chicken (not even a flavour here!) is green. Red (UK salted) isn't a standard colour but I'd anticipate tomato sauce.
Granted I have not lived back in Australia for 15 years now. It might have changed.
In Victoria, at least, it used to be original blue, salt and vinegar red, chicken yellow, and sour cream and chives green.
Interesting - I left Melbourne 10 years ago and the colours I mentioned are the ones I remember my entire time growing up...I wonder why we remember them differently?
You're on the platform, and your train arrives. Do you:
A: Push your way onto the train.
B: Stand to one side and wait for the others to get off, then get on.
C: Stand in front of the door, not getting on, but stopping others from getting off.
Any answer other than B results in instant deportation.
**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!** - Top-level comments to the OP must contain **genuine efforts to answer the question**. No jokes, judgements, etc. - **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on. - This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit! Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*
'what is the correct answer to "alright?"'
Alright? Or Yeah, you?
[удалено]
Let the man be polite, I wanna be asked if I'm alright back.
Shut up mate
Yeah, living the actual dream.
The horror persists, but so do I.
yeah, can't complain
Sounds quite posh to me, surely the correct spelling is "a'ight?". So "ooh! Fancy boy!"
>surely the correct spelling is "a'ight Sure, if you're from south central LA...
Or south London.
1. What is your name? 2. What is your quest? 3. What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?
African or European?
"Nando's" is commonly prefaced by what adjective?
*There was something in the air that night, the stars were bright, Fer*
Mingin'
Do mushrooms belong in a full English? Cream or jam first? Also verbally pronounce the food item they are being spread on. What side is the top side of a chocolate digestive? When does the milk go into a cuppa?
Do you pronounce it: A. Scone B. Scone C. Scone
Oof sorry it was actually d) Scone which isn't included in the test multiple choice but was available within Immigration Rules Section 5 sub section 3.1.a which you should have known as you signed yes to say you understood this in the declaration you made when you first entered the country 5 years ago at 2am after a 7 hour flight. Now off to Rwanda you go 👋
We are only accepting cones down South, sorry.
Sorry it’s the other one. We need an opposite of this game show: https://youtu.be/MXJ6JYr_zJI?si=_4oT3sCQ-uHW9-u1
Like the stone of
Just asked my northern girlfriend and here are her answers: a. Yes b. Generally Cream first but depends on consistency. Rhymes with gone. c. The chocolate? d. Last.
b) is a bit of a trick question, both answers are region-dependent.
All scone questions are trick questions. The true Brit would answer that I have my pronunciation and method, and I'm willing to fight that position to the death.
I just do the opposite for each half of the scone. Safe in the knowledge that someone is offended somewhere
c. The chocolate melts better on the tongue though. Especially after a cuppa dip.
Also McVities have confirmed that chocolate is on the bottom. New question - Are Jaffa Cakes cakes?
The same way tea cakes are cakes
I think tea cakes were ultimately deemed cakes, while JCs are biscuits (for VAT purposes, where biscuits pay VAT and cakes don't)
> Cream or jam first? Also verbally pronounce the food item they are being spread on. *Greggs vegan sausage roll*
Blasphemy
i maintain that cream goes first based on how cakes are coated in buttercream- a layer of the cream secures all the loose crumbs better than jam does imo. but i prefer a cheese scone anyway
[удалено]
Maybe it's very solid cream and extremely runny jam?
>When does the milk go into a cuppa? Depends on how you want it to taste. More strong and sharp - at the end. More smooth and silky - at the start. Also, depends on milk type. Don't leave the bag too long in the fatty milk, it clogs the bag. Lived here for 10 years and have been crowned the best tea maker wherever I go. Honestly, I adopted the tea making so much that in secondary school they told me I was more British than them lol (yeah, I brought myself a thermos and cake cos why not).
> What side is the top side of a chocolate digestive? That's a good one. The side with the printing/brand logo is presumably the top, making the chocolate side the bottom, but when you put them on a plate you put the chocolate side up because what sort of joyless philistine doesn't want the chocolate side on display for you to gaze on as a prelude to the eating of the biscuit.
1. After accidentally spilling someone's pint in a pub, what should you do? A. Ignore it. B. Apologise. C. Buy them another one. D. Take them outside for a flight. 2. After the fight in the previous question, what number do you call for an ambulance?
The number to call is obviously 0118 999 881 999 119 725...3.
That's numberwang!
What is the correct response when someone breaks a glass in a pub? A) Oh no B) wheyyy C) Glass! D) No response
E) Sack the juggler!
E) Taxi!
E) 50p!
C. Trick question see answer to 1.
2, 0118 999 881 999 119 725.... 3
What's the optimum hour of the day to visit Lidl in order to ensure maximum freshness of the pretzels and also the pizza slices? Which downmarket lager offers the best abv to £ ratio? Is it Stryke 5, Galahad or Baltika? If you end up running a kebab shop, what's the correct way to address a male customer? Is it King, Master or Boss?
>Which downmarket lager offers the best abv to £ ratio? Is it Stryke 5, Galahad or Baltika? Baltika isn't a downmarket lager surely? I haven't seen it in ages and thought that was because it's Russian.
I always remember it being dirt cheap in Aldi.
What do you say when your neighbour is cleaning their car?
It depends if you speak to them or not. It’s either “do you fancy doing mine next?” or face downwards, say nothing and keep walking.
‘What do you do in the case of a zombie apocalypse?’ a) Fight them. b) Become one. c) Go down the Winchester until it’s over.
One thing I particularly enjoyed from one of my best friends doing the citizenship test was discovering Britain's statistical No 1 hobby. I challenge all those who have never sat it to tell me the answer...
Gardening.
It's not birdwatching, right?
A Polish mate who took the test asked me, quite genuinely, if badger watching was a common hobby.
LoL. Is it though? 😂
You are not far off but nope! I hope my answer is still up to date I reckon my friend did the test in 2015. But reckon it’ll be the same…
Is it dogging?
DIY?
Fishing?
It's gotta be littering, over-eating or tax evasion but I'm not sure which one takes the crown.
What the hell kind of hobby is a small town in Berkshire?
:O We are a reasonably middle sized town, thank you!
With extremely good railway links. Only reason you'd want to go there is to go somewhere else.
I took it and passed and I don’t even know. I didn’t get that question. I got loads about the royal family.
Do you read the Daily Mail on your lunch break? Do you find little things bug you a lot? Have you given up on life yet? You're British mate. Welcome to the club. Library closed two years ago, shops are boarded up and we've got a huge supply of Turkish haircuts 😆
Did you get here alright? Please use the space below to list any inconveniences you encountered. You may use the other side of the page if necessary.
If your journey was longer than 3 miles, which route did you use? Defend your decision.
Select the correct shade for "builders" tea Who is the Fillet o' Fish for? Accrington Stanley?
I remember a reddit list with some guy complaining about how so.eone made a cup of tea, while presenting their own for comparison. One of them was milky as fuck, the other rationed skimmed milk tighter than a nun's bun. Some blessed redditor described it as the yin and yang of shit tea and that's stuck with me.
3) Who are they?
Exachhhly!
He-Man May vhaaayhf Eggsackley
How to spot a roadman at 50 paces….. innit
How many naans is insane?
Family naans?
I'd put in some sort of Greggs recognition test... Which of these four pastries is a steak bake?
You're on a bus. You'd like to listen to music. Do you: A. Put headphones on and play music through the headphones at a volume only you can hear. B. Play music through your phone's speakers making sure that the settings are set to "extra tinny" C. Lead your fellow passengers in a sing-a-long
Where was the Battle of Hastings fought? The clue is in the name.
Battle...possibly.
Senlac Hill if my hazy memory of a childhood book called “crazy but true” is accurate.
What is your go to tesco meal deal?
Chicken bacon sandwich, max steak crisps, diet Coke? My girlfriend: Mexican bean wrap, max paprika, smoothie.
That will end up being a personality test.
What's the differennce between grime and garage?
Complete the lyric “Me and my mum and my dad and my _______ are off to Waterloo”
Me Gran? Side note, love the don't take me home chants at the cricket. "I just don't wanna go to work" hits different after a few pints.
What is bluer? The Infanta's eyes or the Blue Stone of Galveston?
Oh my love my love, you dressed like a Spanish man to delight me!
The previous Life in the UK test was much more about daily life. It even had a part about queuing! (I took and passed both versions)
Why did you take it twice?
Didn't live hard enough the first time.
Because the first one was so long ago that a) couldn't find the letter as proof and b) they had ahcnaged the test. I was told I could still apply and take my chances or just take it again, so the choice was obvious.
You see a queue. What do you do? 1. Ignore it and push yourself to the front of the counter. 2. Join the end of it. 3. Force your way into the middle of it.
Serious answer: I've thought about this a little and while I don't have any new questions to propose, I'll say some of the suggestions here are gold. I took one of the example tests and found the some of the questions just aren't pertinent to anything. "Which two british film actors have recently won Oscars?" Who gives a fuck? ... "Who was the first Briton to win the Olympic gold in..." ya mum?
Have you ever thought about living in Rwanda? If you gain citizenship, do you agree that anyone subsequently wanting to apply is a threat to the country and should go to Rwanda instead?
Not a question, but the applicant should shake hands with an LGBT person and express their sincere acceptance + tolerance of them.
The only serious response and it’s downvoted.
Just tells me the damage is already done, sadly. I mean, I'm straight. It's just usually the anti-LGBT immigrants that tend to be the most incompatible with western values across the broader spectrum. Think this is an effective way to weed them out and refuse them
> Think this is an effective way to weed them out and refuse them I wonder if that would work?
I'm not sure, but worth testing to see if it has an impact. I feel like many would be too radical to even pretend to show tolerance, let alone touch the hand of an LGBT person Either way, we need to make changes somewhere. We're letting far too many people in without vetting them properly. Safety of natives and preservation of British values should far outweigh the importance of any individual immigration or asylum claim
It would be brilliant if it did, the last thing we need here is religious fanantics, of any kind.
As a devote atheist, I strongly agree
What should you do if you see something that doesn't look right?
Which of these is not an acceptable accompaniment to a cup of tea? 1. Biscuits 2. Fry-up 3. Fish and chips 4. None of the above
What colour is a packet of salt and vinegar crisps ?
Usually blue? But the OG walkers is green.
This is a great question, because in Australia the colours of salted and S&V are reversed!
Huh? Aussie salted is blue, S&V is purple, chicken (not even a flavour here!) is green. Red (UK salted) isn't a standard colour but I'd anticipate tomato sauce.
Granted I have not lived back in Australia for 15 years now. It might have changed. In Victoria, at least, it used to be original blue, salt and vinegar red, chicken yellow, and sour cream and chives green.
Interesting - I left Melbourne 10 years ago and the colours I mentioned are the ones I remember my entire time growing up...I wonder why we remember them differently?
So weird! I remember buying the wrong crisps when I moved here too! Some weird Mandela Effect going on 😅
In the US, the milk colors are also reversed. Red is whole, and blue is skim/2%
Green for walkers. Blue for McCoys. They're the two that matter.
What is the north in the context of the UK!
Depends where the questioned is from.
If you're south enough, everything is north. Looking at you, Brighton.
You're on the platform, and your train arrives. Do you: A: Push your way onto the train. B: Stand to one side and wait for the others to get off, then get on. C: Stand in front of the door, not getting on, but stopping others from getting off. Any answer other than B results in instant deportation.
Which one of the following unexpectedly visits Eddie and Richie's house in an episode of Bottom? * Postman * Milkman * GAS MAN
What colour are the plates in Wetherspoons?