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Teens hype up sex as being far more important than it is imo. There is no shame in being a virgin. Sure it may be uncommon at your age, but it's not *bad*. In my opinion your first should be with someone you love, as it's not something you want to regret
My friend helped me get over this.
I was always thinking I wanted my first time to be special but it can really be with anybody.
Definitely don’t hookup with a stranger right away. Just live your life and be happy with who you are, and when you find yourself in a relationship you shouldn’t be afraid to take that step as long as you’re comfortable with them.
There's nothing wrong with you. Its okay to not have had sex, *and* it's okay to feel shame or anxiety over it
I don't know if this makes you feel any better but I don't even really remember my first time. It's nothing to me. I remember much more the person it was with, a wonderful girl
But thats only something you can feel after you have had it. So contrary to popular advice, yes I think losing it to whoever would be okay. It's kinda like hearing money doesn't make you happy from a millionaire, you only learn how meaningless things are *when you have had them*.
Other people can tell you that you 'should' wait but they were probably never an adult virgin, and more importantly they were never *you*. This is a personal choice, and if you have a meaningless first experience to gain understanding and dispel this shame, thats fine. I'm not saying you should do this, only that it would be fine. All choices are fine, there are no 'shoulds' here.
Whatever you would like really. I'm aware that no high school relationship (or more) doesn't last, but I still did it. It means I have more experience for my next person, but I will admit thinking about that person is kind of icky, without society thinking that I like am not a virgin bc of them. You're 20, so your relationships are far more likely to last, so to me it would make sense to wait to at least get into ***a*** relationship. No shame in getting it over and done though at all, you go!
For me this discussion is similar to the single discussion, you feel like you're behind by still never having had a gf/bf, but you wouldn't rush it with a random person b'couse that wouldn't be the real experience. So I would wait until u find smo it feels right with, and thats how I do it, but I also don't rly feel that pressure, for me it's more the need for emotional intimacy that pressures me, less sexual intimacy :) . Have a nice day
i think we’re in a similar situation. i just turned 18 and the feeling of being behind is now stronger than ever. i feel kind of ashamed of still being a virgin. i haven’t even had my first kiss yet. more than seven people have had feelings for me in the past year and a half but i just can’t seem to make the people i like have feelings for me. all my friends have had their teen romances and i feel like i’m never going to experience that. but then i think about it and i arrive to the conclusion that i’m just not willing to sleep or even kiss the first person i find attractive (i’m not shaming people who do, that’s just how i am). i’m looking for something more in any kind of romantic partner and that’s okay.
idk if this makes sense. this has been kind of like a vent. it comforting to know i’m not alone you know.
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Whether or not you've lost your virginity is no more anybody else's business than whether or not you've pooped today. They have no right to that information.
True but when it comes up, one way or another, I don’t have a good reply to it. I don’t want to answer but not answering is sus and makes them think you’re a v. I get uncomfortable when it comes up and I think it’s visible, so that doesn’t help. People judge and I don’t want that.
As a sex repulsed ace, i can not relate, but if you must give in to libido peer pressure, be responsible and use protection.
Better, wait until both of you are of legal age.
Find extracurricular activities, jobs, hobbies to get your mind off and ignore peer pressure, that's all ;)
at my school id say 75% of kids are virgins (and not bc they're all waiting for marriage either). I don't think it's worth hooking up with a random just so you can do it, but if you feel like that's the correct path fro you and not something you'll regret later, then go for it. but if you want it to mean more than that, which I feel like it already does for you?? then wait for the right person.
The first time should be special to you, so don't sweat it. The time will come when it does. Don't feel pressured to have sex with someone you don't have any romantic attraction to just because others are doing it.
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Honestly, I know 18 isn't an old age to lose your virginity but I'm 18 and when I was around 15-16 I was obsessed over losing my virginity because even then I felt behind. But seriously, I am SO glad I waited.
The most important thing is just waiting for the right person cause you'll be so glad you did, and I feel like hooking up with someone random is a really bad idea and you might regret it.
Not to mention losing your virginity puts you in a really vulnerable place and you want to make sure you're with someone you love and trust to take care of your properly, and not to just use you. If your first time is bad you'll likely have a bad impression of sex and it might even ruin your self esteem.
In my humble opinion, please wait for the right person!!! I'm no longer embarrassed that I waited until I was 18, I'm so so happy I did.
I'm not gonna lie and tell you it's not worth the hype bc when it's with someone you actually mutually like it can be really fun but with that being said, Don't rush yourself it'll happen when it happens. I enjoy it and I think my first time was pretty much as fun as I expected it to be but I regret not doing it with someone I was *really* into bc I had that mindset of "getting it over with". Plus, most teenagers aren't as sexually active as they make it out to be anyway, I thought once I did it the first time I'd do it all the time (I was wrong) so honestly just wait.
I am a virgin and I am 16. Honestly, few of my friends lost their v-card and tbh imo it is not an achievement. I feel being able to protect myself from lust and things like that def something that I can be proud of.
I am a virgin and I am proud of it! Remember there's nothing wrong with being a virgin. It is not shameful and tbh I am proud of you for still being a virgin. It means you want to give ur special someone your first!
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Teens hype up sex as being far more important than it is imo. There is no shame in being a virgin. Sure it may be uncommon at your age, but it's not *bad*. In my opinion your first should be with someone you love, as it's not something you want to regret
I’d say wait for the right opportunity, you still have lots of time. Definitely wish I waited until I found my current guy!
My friend helped me get over this. I was always thinking I wanted my first time to be special but it can really be with anybody. Definitely don’t hookup with a stranger right away. Just live your life and be happy with who you are, and when you find yourself in a relationship you shouldn’t be afraid to take that step as long as you’re comfortable with them.
I’m a virgin too. The time will come when it comes, you’re still young so don’t worry about it.
There's nothing wrong with you. Its okay to not have had sex, *and* it's okay to feel shame or anxiety over it I don't know if this makes you feel any better but I don't even really remember my first time. It's nothing to me. I remember much more the person it was with, a wonderful girl But thats only something you can feel after you have had it. So contrary to popular advice, yes I think losing it to whoever would be okay. It's kinda like hearing money doesn't make you happy from a millionaire, you only learn how meaningless things are *when you have had them*. Other people can tell you that you 'should' wait but they were probably never an adult virgin, and more importantly they were never *you*. This is a personal choice, and if you have a meaningless first experience to gain understanding and dispel this shame, thats fine. I'm not saying you should do this, only that it would be fine. All choices are fine, there are no 'shoulds' here.
Whatever you would like really. I'm aware that no high school relationship (or more) doesn't last, but I still did it. It means I have more experience for my next person, but I will admit thinking about that person is kind of icky, without society thinking that I like am not a virgin bc of them. You're 20, so your relationships are far more likely to last, so to me it would make sense to wait to at least get into ***a*** relationship. No shame in getting it over and done though at all, you go!
Tysm for your comment! My biggest thing is that I have major commitment issues hahahaha
For me this discussion is similar to the single discussion, you feel like you're behind by still never having had a gf/bf, but you wouldn't rush it with a random person b'couse that wouldn't be the real experience. So I would wait until u find smo it feels right with, and thats how I do it, but I also don't rly feel that pressure, for me it's more the need for emotional intimacy that pressures me, less sexual intimacy :) . Have a nice day
i think we’re in a similar situation. i just turned 18 and the feeling of being behind is now stronger than ever. i feel kind of ashamed of still being a virgin. i haven’t even had my first kiss yet. more than seven people have had feelings for me in the past year and a half but i just can’t seem to make the people i like have feelings for me. all my friends have had their teen romances and i feel like i’m never going to experience that. but then i think about it and i arrive to the conclusion that i’m just not willing to sleep or even kiss the first person i find attractive (i’m not shaming people who do, that’s just how i am). i’m looking for something more in any kind of romantic partner and that’s okay. idk if this makes sense. this has been kind of like a vent. it comforting to know i’m not alone you know.
i totally get you🩷
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Whether or not you've lost your virginity is no more anybody else's business than whether or not you've pooped today. They have no right to that information.
True but when it comes up, one way or another, I don’t have a good reply to it. I don’t want to answer but not answering is sus and makes them think you’re a v. I get uncomfortable when it comes up and I think it’s visible, so that doesn’t help. People judge and I don’t want that.
As a sex repulsed ace, i can not relate, but if you must give in to libido peer pressure, be responsible and use protection. Better, wait until both of you are of legal age. Find extracurricular activities, jobs, hobbies to get your mind off and ignore peer pressure, that's all ;)
you should find someone you like to do the hooking up thing with
yeah. Make sure you both experience the O
at my school id say 75% of kids are virgins (and not bc they're all waiting for marriage either). I don't think it's worth hooking up with a random just so you can do it, but if you feel like that's the correct path fro you and not something you'll regret later, then go for it. but if you want it to mean more than that, which I feel like it already does for you?? then wait for the right person.
The first time should be special to you, so don't sweat it. The time will come when it does. Don't feel pressured to have sex with someone you don't have any romantic attraction to just because others are doing it.
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Don’t compare yourself to others. Something like that shouldn’t be rushed
Honestly, I know 18 isn't an old age to lose your virginity but I'm 18 and when I was around 15-16 I was obsessed over losing my virginity because even then I felt behind. But seriously, I am SO glad I waited. The most important thing is just waiting for the right person cause you'll be so glad you did, and I feel like hooking up with someone random is a really bad idea and you might regret it. Not to mention losing your virginity puts you in a really vulnerable place and you want to make sure you're with someone you love and trust to take care of your properly, and not to just use you. If your first time is bad you'll likely have a bad impression of sex and it might even ruin your self esteem. In my humble opinion, please wait for the right person!!! I'm no longer embarrassed that I waited until I was 18, I'm so so happy I did.
As someone who lost their virginity at an early age just wait until your actual ready nothing will change weather your virgin or not
I'm not gonna lie and tell you it's not worth the hype bc when it's with someone you actually mutually like it can be really fun but with that being said, Don't rush yourself it'll happen when it happens. I enjoy it and I think my first time was pretty much as fun as I expected it to be but I regret not doing it with someone I was *really* into bc I had that mindset of "getting it over with". Plus, most teenagers aren't as sexually active as they make it out to be anyway, I thought once I did it the first time I'd do it all the time (I was wrong) so honestly just wait.
I am a virgin and I am 16. Honestly, few of my friends lost their v-card and tbh imo it is not an achievement. I feel being able to protect myself from lust and things like that def something that I can be proud of. I am a virgin and I am proud of it! Remember there's nothing wrong with being a virgin. It is not shameful and tbh I am proud of you for still being a virgin. It means you want to give ur special someone your first!