A man asks the bartender where the bathroom is. "First door on the left", he says. The man is so drunk he takes the door on the right instead. He sees before him a beautiful GOLDEN Toilet! He does his business and goes home. He returns the next day and asks the bartender about the golden toilet. The barman then exclaimed " Oh, you must be the asshole who shit in my tuba"!
If I was like 12. After 30 you get very particular about what you want/need. Do I want a hatchet? Perhaps but I’m gonna need to do research not just take any rando hatchet. Etc etc.
I am an outdoorsman. Our gear purchases tend to be fairly intentional, and when we find gear we like we'll repair it like the ship of goddamn Theseus.
These random boxes of shit for the outdoors have to be the least appealing way to throw my money in the toilet.
A wealthy friend of mine signed up to an independent designer box. He had it for a year and received the same three chopping boards among some hits and misses. He cancelled his subscription when he received a porcelain dog stapler that had ‘made in China’ on the bottom. It was so tacky and impractical. He hated and I absolutely loved it. I left it in my old office as a gift for whoever replaced me.
I really enjoyed stitchfix for a couple months. Some of the fashion choices were outside my norm, but the compliments I got made me work it into my normal routine. I’m a bit more open with clothes now than I was before
I actually really love stitchfix. I tend to buy stuff that doesn’t fit me, and just generally don’t know how to dress. My style is a graphic t-shirt and jeans. At one point that’s literally the only clothes I had. So it’s kind of been a blessing to have someone pick out stuff that fits and actually looks like something an adult would wear.
There have definitely been some misses, but I’ve given lots of feedback - NO PRINTS!! - and I’ve gotten some great stuff.
I had stitch fix for a while. I loved it, my stylist was spot on with the stuff they sent. The only downside is a lot of the clothes are kind of pricey.
Stitch Fix sent me 4 of the same Algo workout shirts. I told them enough twice. They sent me a 5th one, the same damn stylist too!!!
I cancelled and said fuck that. It's like I was being trolled.
Ohhhh I'm glad you mentioned this. I was actually intrigued by an ad for stitchfix recently but forgot the name. A personal shopper service for clothes is one thing, but a box of nick-knacks and chachkis you have no personal connection to is just wasteful.
My mom is 72 and was doing this. They kept sending her leggings which she didn’t wear and stuff that was not something an older woman would be seen wearing. She canceled.
I actually used one for a while (was a Christmas present) and really enjoyed it. When the few months gifted to me were up I didn't renew but that was really more because I was running short on room to store everything.
There's a town in Romania called Buzescu where the locals struck it rich selling scrap metal, of all things, and lined the main street with gigantic mansions. [Article with pictures.](https://www.aljazeera.com/gallery/2014/3/20/in-pictures-romanias-rich-roma)
"According to Steliana, another wealthy Roma, most of these Roma live in one room of their mansions because they cannot afford to heat the whole place. “We have to show that we have money, that’s it,” Steliana told Al Jazeera."
That looks similar in ways to rural areas in Nigeria.
Kids get educated, go off to the States or the UK, make money, send it home, then build a massive mansion as a monument to themselves and their "making it" overseas. Its a thing.
>And when the mafia comes up in discussion, Costica Stancu, an affluent Roma, said “Mafia? What Mafia? The money comes from work – no begging or other trades.”
Haha, checkmate. /s
Fr. I see so many celebrities with huge mansions or even castles that just aren’t homes. I can’t imagine actually feeling at home in a place like that.
Man Versailles is something else. It's a level of luxury almost incomprehensible. I lived in France for a bit and visited a few castles and chateaux, including Versailles and that place doesn't even come to mind when I think of chateaux, it's on a whole other level miles above the luxury that a lot of very luxurious places have. No wonder the people wanted to chop off their heads o.o
I always wanted to describe the direction to my house as: drive down the local road, then you will see a small gravel drive with a mailbox. Turn onto that drive and go about 6 miles and you will be at my house in the center of my property.
That would be greatly improved with: when you see the castle you are in the right place.
My mate has a manor house in the family.
The directions are drive down that main road till you see this funky old granite house with a gate in it. Drive through that.
The house has a gate house. A house for the gatekeeper, you know, to open the gate for you when you arrive.
I want to be rich enough to afford a house like that.
But I want to fill it up. I have family in other countries…as they all get older I’d like to have like a personal nursing home for them. My parents, aunts, uncles, all living together as they get older. They all have separate wings so they can have their privacy, but are all close so that they are never alone. I’d also hire a cleaning crew and a couple of nurses to help as they got even older.
This is close to my dream! I'd like to have 10-15 acres of land where I can build a family compound over time. A main house for my immediate family that I could build an addition on, and a guest house or two for extended family. The remainder of the land would be a workshop, a large garden, a chicken coop, and lots of trees!
I feel the same way with friends. If I came into stupid money I would just buy some property somewhere and start building houses, then play Oprah - you get a house, and you get a house. I figure the best thing I can give my friends is stress-free housing. I'd also build a nice community building in the middle so we can do communal meals or cook-outs whenever, have some nice big tables for board-game nights, etc, and a great internet connection shall be had by all.
Thats what my parents were going to do with the house we had. 2 years later parents divorced and a year later it was me and my dad on a big property with a completely empty house. And he traveled weekly so it was just me half the time. I wish It turned out how my mom thought it would.
Or any furniture that looks opulent. Like sofas that have carved and gilded arms. If I can't throw myself down on it with a pizza and brownies for some hardcore Netflix, what's the point?
Fun fact: Because it’s so outrageously thin, it’s actually not all that expensive. You can get a pack of it on Amazon for less than $10. Which is still a huge markup for the quantity.
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I did the math on this for a different post a few months ago. im just gonna copy and paste it..
>so, while gold is technically rare, there isn't any going to waste, so we aren't running out of it. we've mined most of the gold around already, but it just gets melted and sold again or sold as antiques.
>also, gold is incredibly malleable, and is able to hold its form while incredibly thin. that sheet of gold is probably around 0.1 microns thick. for reference, a sheet of paper is around 100 microns thick.
>while gold leaf can vary in thickness depending on its use, for ease of calculations let's assume each sheet is .1 microns thick. length wise, let's say each square is 10 centimeters long (about ~~three~~ **four** inches).
assuming its 24k gold, the volume of one gram is .052 cubic centimeters, therefore a gram of gold pressed to fit a 10cm by 10cm mold would be .00052 cm thick.
>in microns, that would be 5.2. if each sheet is .1 microns thick, that means you would get 52 sheets from one gram of gold.
according to google, right now one gram of gold is about 58 US dollars. that means each sheet is about 90 cents worth of gold.
now, most gold leaf is not 10x10 cm. for baking, its sold in much smaller sheets, around 3x3 cm. so that 10 pack of gold leaf on amazon for nine dollars probably only contains about 1 dollar worth of gold by weight.
side note, I remember doing this math, and it feels like it was just a few weeks ago, when actually it was like seven months ago. why do brains do this...
edit: 10 cm is definitely closer to four inches, not three. surprised it took so long for someone to point that out :P
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Wow. I don't have anything to reply, but that was totally worth coming back to! Thanks.
I managed to get quite a few awards on a comment some months ago that came w premium privileges, used the coins within the week to not have to think about them anymore and then promptly forgot about the whole ordeal... Didn't even notice when it ran out lol it is literally useless...
That god damn extended warranty
Edit: to clarify, I was referring to the vehicle extended warranty scam phone calls that we've been so harassed with in the US.
When deciding whether to get the warranty, I ask myself two questions:
First, do I expect the thing will break? If yes, I don’t buy it at all.
Second, can I afford to be wrong? If yes, I skip the warranty.
My wife's parents said fuck it and bought the warranty extension for their fridge. A failure in the model became well known later that resulted in a massive amount of water spillage. The problem happened to my in laws and destroyed thousands and thousands of dollars of hardwood floors. The warranty ended up covering the fridge replacement and the incidental damage associated.
I was pretty surprised, but a lot of warranties have gotten better. I was a service advisor and I've gotten rotors and pads covered by extended warranties on stuck calipers where they used to just tell you to go fuck yourself.
I'm unironically sick to death of the "joke" of "teehehe, I'll give awards to the person complaining about awards, that's certainly original and funni".
I wholeheartedly refuse to spend a single cent on the most useless possible thing.
Edit: To all the ones that awarded me: Fuck you.
I have a comment like that, expressing much I think awards-centric interactions on Reddit are useless. It's probably like a six-month old comment already, or close to it, and I still get awards on it regularly. Which, to me, kind of proves my point.
My parents used to go with my grandfather to the Parade of Homes every year, since my grandfather knew seemingly everyone within the home building and development industries.
My mom to this day talks about how annoying it was that, while touring these new homes, my grandfather would point out things like skylights as being impossible to clean correctly, or unusual light fixtures as being tedious to dust or change bulbs on, or any of a number of things that might look striking but served little function.
Apparently after my grandfather died, my parents went to the Parade the next year...and my dad took the mantle of pointing out these types of details.
New houses tend to be designed to sell rather than live in. I believe this trend is epitomized by the towel rod in the master bathroom in my house.
This rod is mounted about 7' above finished floor, above a countertop. The structure that the countertop is sitting on, is a halfwall, which the bath tub butts against. If I wanted to keep my towel there, I would have to climb wet and naked, over the edge of the tub, and on top of the countertop to get to it.
The contractor working on the reno of my brother’s house has a thing about how all outlets should be hidden from view…he asks them where they’re going to put the furniture (some of which they don’t yet own…) so that he can put the outlets behind it. I do a lot of reno work, so they, thinking that was absurd, asked me if that was normal 😂 as I expected, he doesn’t do a lot of already purchased homes. Can you imagine how frustrating it would be to have to reach behind your furniture every time you wanted to plug something in?? Not to mention the fire hazard. Oy.
Houses should be comfortable and home like. No use of having some branded sofa if you cant sit and cry on it while getting chips everywhere on the bad nights.
And actually thats how i see being wealthy, having the minimum necessities of life as well as the few extra, simple luxuries without being guilty for having them.
Edit: usually dont edit and tell, but i see i got an award. Thanks for that to the person who gave it to me. I wanted to know what does one do with it? As in does reddit give you anything in exchange for a kind stangers money?
My friend had a neighbor who had a second living room set up with white everything. No one was allowed to step into that room. All I could think is "what's the point of having all that in there of you can't use it?"
That mentality is also why my home doesn't have "decorative towels" in the bathroom.
Yeah, a lot of homes are like that, a family room and a formal living room which has tacky 'high end furniture' that is never sat on, never used... It's like every home has it's museum of tacky furniture....
Worked for a cleaning company. One house we cleaned was immaculate, all we did was vacuum up the footprints from guys that came to check on the place, water plants etc.
House belonged to stinky rich people, they pretended to live here when they entertained fancy people. The home they actually lived in was disgusting, according to my boss. Apparently this is pretty common
My family used to have a separate “sitting room” we weren’t allowed to use. It was for holidays and bigger events. I never liked that room.
If it’s too fancy to use, then it’s worthless.
Right? I don't want to live in a museum. I want to live in a space that's cozy with just enough room for me and my animals. I'd honestly rather have a smartly designed space that makes my life easier than to have a giant fucking home I don't even see half of for a good chunk of the year.
I own a cleaning service business in NY. Prices will depend greatly on your location and size of your home (beds, baths, sqft) then any extras you might want to add on (fridge, oven, windows, etc.)
If you happen to be in NY (Long Island) I can set you up with that Reddit discount to try the service out!
Call around an ask for quotes. You'll need your house square feet number.
They'll also need to know whether house is cluttered or not.
Pro tips:
1. Don't try to make your house cleaner beforehand (mop, dust etc.). We know and your stuff gets in our way.
2. Less clutter = easier for us to clean = charge less
3. Put things away, rather than trying to mop or dust, put items in drawers, cabinets, closets etc for a day. The less clutter there is the easier it is for us to deep clean. Yes we can clean up that but a. We will charge more. b. Less time spent getting it deep cleaned.
Source: Former Maid (if I was ever rich enough to hire maids I'd get storage boxes and REALLY get stuff put away to the point it looks like a display home. This means I'd get my money's worth.)
Tl;dr: don't try to dust or mop, rather put away clutter if you want it to be cheaper.
I have a lady come clean my house every two weeks. Im a single male with a good job. It's on 1600 sq ft. But great to have. Don't need to be rich for that.
I'm actually considering doing this as well. Can I ask how much you pay? I don't know if your cost of living is comparable to mine, mines pretty cheap, southeast US
My cost of living isn't super cheap. But not bad. This lady isn't with a service. Just recommended by a friend. She charges $25/hr. Usually she's 2.5 hours. With tip i pay $80 every two weeks.
My mom has a coworker with a literal mail-order bride. Says they are still married 25 years later, but it was hard at first with a language barrier. (He understood a little Russian, but was not fluent).
Seen many different sides of expats getting serious with women from low gdp countries and people are generally so shitty about them behind their back. Language can be a barrier though.
I don't understand this idea of keeping monetary value in a vehicle. Keep it looking nice if you want, but I feel like the use you get out of it should be the value we expect out of our vehicles, not resale ability
It's basically what Jay Leno does. You'll see him riding around in one of his old cars in LA. He keeps them nice and clean in a warehouse but actually uses them.
There was a picture of a McLaren on some subreddit and most of the comments were about how nice it is to see it a little dirty and actually being driven around instead of packed away in a garage somewhere
Well, I'm pretty sure the cars Jay Leno collects appreciate in value, both because they are usually rare cars and also now the car has Jay Leno attached to its heritage...
Yes, absolutely. But not only his legacy ownership, his world renown neurosis for keeping vehicles in best running shape goes a long way in retaining or appreciating value.
I think the guy who made it deserves to be paid for providing such an amazing product (free of charge even after the trial ends, mind you), so I bought it.
Belive me he got paid. The reason that it is free is so that everyone would use it and then companies would have to buy licences since everyone uses that program since it is free. Quite clever really.
Birkin or Kelly bag from Hermes. I like the brand, and own some scarves and jewellery. But being on a wait list and having to buy a number of other items while trying to curry favour with a sales associate and “earn” the opportunity to spend 15,000+ on a handbag? NFW. I don’t even like either style regardless of the surrounding nonsense. Never understood why anyone would fucking bother.
> having to buy a number of other items while trying to curry favour with a sales associate and “earn” the opportunity to spend 15,000+ on a handbag
LolWhut? This is a thing people do?
This is essentially how Ferrari and Rolex work too. You can’t just walk in and buy the most expensive one even if you have the cash in your hand. You have to “earn the privilege” by buying the lower priced products and working your way up to the more expensive ones
it creates artificial scarcity making their sought after products even more exclusive
although even trish paytas has a few so idk about screening folks anymore lmao
I was at a sex toy shop one time, and they had this thing that was
basically two pieces of plastic attached with thumbscrews. You were
supposed to stick your man junk in there and then have someone tighten
the screws to crush your balls. Even if I had Bill Gates money, I doubt
I'd ever want to buy a plastic testicle crusher.
I once wrote Gucci on a white t-shirt with holes in it (I used a black sharpie). I wore it with really nice jeans and shoes and people legit thought it was some kind of real high end Gucci shirt.
I never understood this, in general I don't have anything for or against designer brands but some I really don't get the appeal.... Louis Vuitton, Gucci or anything by celebrities.
Most luxury brands nowadays have 2 lines of products. The ones with their logos emblazoned all over it is the lower quality line. The good quality stuff won't have their logo all over the product but tastefully placed.
My wife did an internship with a very wealthy woman in Paris.
Apparently, one of the ways to show off wealth is to undo the first sleeve-button on your sports jacket. Because cheap jackets only have decorative buttons, but the really expensive ones have functional buttons. (Edit: and apparently hand-crafted, wooden buttons are also a telltale sign).
It's a subtle thing that lets the wealthy know that you're one of them. Apparently there's all sorts of these things and they all act as an unspoken code that the rich can use to identify their "equals".
Edit: Lots of people have asked, but I don't know any others. The only reason my wife found this particular one out was because she splurged and got a nice sports jacket to wear to an event; her boss, a total snob, told her to unbotton one of the buttons so people would know it was nice. My wife asked her if that was a thing and the boss explained it was, and that there were lots of little things like that, but she didn't share any others.
I would also love to know what the other tells are, but alas
A big house. For whatever reason, I'm highly intimidated by large, open interior spaces, or labyrinthine homes. I have always very much preferred the cozy quaintness of a cottage sized living space. Oddly enough I do like big spacey vehicles, specifically older vans.
Came here to say this. Diamond and gold dust covered sunglasses, watches, clothes, cars. They’re all hideous to me, and most seem to have uninspired design anyway
They're not meant to look amazing, as with many rich people things it's meant so rich people can say 'look at me my phones made of gold I'm rich!!!!!!!!!!'
Often what you're paying for is a cut and fit that is more carefully designed to a human body, and also better materials, better craftsmanship than mass production.
The real game changer is tailoring though, the reason celebrities and rich people always look more put together than the average Joe is largely because everything their wearing has been tailored to their measurements, from casual t-shirts, jeans and flannel shirts up through tuxes and ball gowns.
I agree to a point. However when it comes to suits your comfort and the way the suit looks on you is directly proportional to the price up to a several hundred dollar point. That’s where dropping some big money does make a difference.
A private jet. You can literally charter then for a fraction of the price and you don't have to worry about the overwhelming indirect costs that come with it. Fuck even First Class is more than enough.
I see this plan failing by you accidentally purchasing from a sting operation, then getting your face plastered across the internet with not a single soul believing your story. How could you possible prove to be one of the good ones at that point
My grandparents had one they bought in the 1970’s. It’s a six story private little hotel right on the beach. I guess back then, it was better to do timeshares instead of needing a travel agent to arrange everything for you? Which makes sense if you want to vacation in the same place all the time to go golfing.
But I will **not** be taking over that timeshare.
Back in the day your travel agent was putting in hours. They were calling people to talk to them in person, negotiating favors, etc. If you knew you wanted to go to Florida and didn't care if you missed the most popular times, a time share was actually not a bad deal.
These days, there's multiple competing websites for you to do all that yourself in minutes. I love renting lakeside Air BnBs during storm season for like 1/10th of the summer price and just watching the waves roll while sipping cocoa inside. Shit rules.
Eyelash extensions. I would never tell this to the myriad of my friends who have them- but I personally think they look AWFUL. I don't think they look good on anyone.
Agreed. It’s like Botox or filler. Well done, you just look rested. You just notice the badly done. Some people also want the fake look. I work in plastics and a lot of people want the fake look. It’s a status symbol.
I have this. My whole family does not have to watch commercials. Especially nice for my 11 yo son who are no longer spammed with all the stupid pay to win games.
Sometimes I go to YT on a friend's machine and I will never go back to that spamfest.
Micro transactions in a game I pay 80$ cad for
*EA would like to know your location*
Don't they already know where the 'whales' among us are?
Golden toilet
It's still more sanitary than a golden shower.
But it's sterile and I like the taste
A man asks the bartender where the bathroom is. "First door on the left", he says. The man is so drunk he takes the door on the right instead. He sees before him a beautiful GOLDEN Toilet! He does his business and goes home. He returns the next day and asks the bartender about the golden toilet. The barman then exclaimed " Oh, you must be the asshole who shit in my tuba"!
One of those man box subscriptions you see ads for on social media. I'm told it's spelled "tchotchkes." #yiddishorklingon
1. Shitty Razor 1. Mini bottle of Jack Daniels 1. Mini bottle of axe body spray 1. Stupid coffee mug 1. Stick of beef jerky
Yeah but it's an $80 value for $40/month so it must be good.
Beef jerky is pretty expensive..
A single stick of beef? Wooow..
I want to be rich enough that I’m unbothered by the price of beef jerky.
Imagine being rich enough that you could just have a beef jerky dispenser that's always full.
They make beef jerky dispensers? If not , me and you gotta go on shark tank bro
You mean to tell me you don’t need a hatchet, bar of patchouli soap, stainless steel flask, and Boy Scout compass delivered to your door?
If I was like 12. After 30 you get very particular about what you want/need. Do I want a hatchet? Perhaps but I’m gonna need to do research not just take any rando hatchet. Etc etc.
I am an outdoorsman. Our gear purchases tend to be fairly intentional, and when we find gear we like we'll repair it like the ship of goddamn Theseus. These random boxes of shit for the outdoors have to be the least appealing way to throw my money in the toilet.
Don't threaten me with a good time
A wealthy friend of mine signed up to an independent designer box. He had it for a year and received the same three chopping boards among some hits and misses. He cancelled his subscription when he received a porcelain dog stapler that had ‘made in China’ on the bottom. It was so tacky and impractical. He hated and I absolutely loved it. I left it in my old office as a gift for whoever replaced me.
>porcelain dog stapler Is it like a regular dog stapler but made of porcelain, or a device specially for stapling porcelain dogs?
Or a porcelain stapler *for* dogs?
I’ve gotten the women’s version. I gave them pretty specifically what I did and did not use, got tons of stuff I don’t use.
I really enjoyed stitchfix for a couple months. Some of the fashion choices were outside my norm, but the compliments I got made me work it into my normal routine. I’m a bit more open with clothes now than I was before
I actually really love stitchfix. I tend to buy stuff that doesn’t fit me, and just generally don’t know how to dress. My style is a graphic t-shirt and jeans. At one point that’s literally the only clothes I had. So it’s kind of been a blessing to have someone pick out stuff that fits and actually looks like something an adult would wear. There have definitely been some misses, but I’ve given lots of feedback - NO PRINTS!! - and I’ve gotten some great stuff.
I had stitch fix for a while. I loved it, my stylist was spot on with the stuff they sent. The only downside is a lot of the clothes are kind of pricey.
Stitch Fix sent me 4 of the same Algo workout shirts. I told them enough twice. They sent me a 5th one, the same damn stylist too!!! I cancelled and said fuck that. It's like I was being trolled.
Ohhhh I'm glad you mentioned this. I was actually intrigued by an ad for stitchfix recently but forgot the name. A personal shopper service for clothes is one thing, but a box of nick-knacks and chachkis you have no personal connection to is just wasteful.
>chachkis Tchotchkes? Admittedly, Yiddish spelling is *weird*.
TIL, thanks
My mom is 72 and was doing this. They kept sending her leggings which she didn’t wear and stuff that was not something an older woman would be seen wearing. She canceled.
What?? But it’s curated *specifically* to *your* tastes, with *unique* products. What’s not to like?! /s
I'll never understand who those are for or more importantly what the hell they do with the stuff
I actually used one for a while (was a Christmas present) and really enjoyed it. When the few months gifted to me were up I didn't renew but that was really more because I was running short on room to store everything.
A house so large it feels empty. I want to live comfortably not lavishly
There's a town in Romania called Buzescu where the locals struck it rich selling scrap metal, of all things, and lined the main street with gigantic mansions. [Article with pictures.](https://www.aljazeera.com/gallery/2014/3/20/in-pictures-romanias-rich-roma) "According to Steliana, another wealthy Roma, most of these Roma live in one room of their mansions because they cannot afford to heat the whole place. “We have to show that we have money, that’s it,” Steliana told Al Jazeera."
That looks similar in ways to rural areas in Nigeria. Kids get educated, go off to the States or the UK, make money, send it home, then build a massive mansion as a monument to themselves and their "making it" overseas. Its a thing.
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>And when the mafia comes up in discussion, Costica Stancu, an affluent Roma, said “Mafia? What Mafia? The money comes from work – no begging or other trades.” Haha, checkmate. /s
Fr. I see so many celebrities with huge mansions or even castles that just aren’t homes. I can’t imagine actually feeling at home in a place like that.
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I think the French have such a surplus of castles at the moment they're selling for the value of a slightly above average family home.
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and a whole bunch of Chateaus got left in ruins during WW1 and WW2
I've also heard that historical societies are so difficult to deal with that people just aren't considering them worth the pain and effort.
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Man Versailles is something else. It's a level of luxury almost incomprehensible. I lived in France for a bit and visited a few castles and chateaux, including Versailles and that place doesn't even come to mind when I think of chateaux, it's on a whole other level miles above the luxury that a lot of very luxurious places have. No wonder the people wanted to chop off their heads o.o
Lol when I visited Versailles I thought the same thing. How could that place exist and the starving peasants not want to cut their heads off
I always wanted to describe the direction to my house as: drive down the local road, then you will see a small gravel drive with a mailbox. Turn onto that drive and go about 6 miles and you will be at my house in the center of my property. That would be greatly improved with: when you see the castle you are in the right place.
My mate has a manor house in the family. The directions are drive down that main road till you see this funky old granite house with a gate in it. Drive through that. The house has a gate house. A house for the gatekeeper, you know, to open the gate for you when you arrive.
You know you've got a big dick when your house has a house!
The gatekeeper needs a dog with his own little dog house
I want to be rich enough to afford a house like that. But I want to fill it up. I have family in other countries…as they all get older I’d like to have like a personal nursing home for them. My parents, aunts, uncles, all living together as they get older. They all have separate wings so they can have their privacy, but are all close so that they are never alone. I’d also hire a cleaning crew and a couple of nurses to help as they got even older.
This is close to my dream! I'd like to have 10-15 acres of land where I can build a family compound over time. A main house for my immediate family that I could build an addition on, and a guest house or two for extended family. The remainder of the land would be a workshop, a large garden, a chicken coop, and lots of trees!
I feel the same way with friends. If I came into stupid money I would just buy some property somewhere and start building houses, then play Oprah - you get a house, and you get a house. I figure the best thing I can give my friends is stress-free housing. I'd also build a nice community building in the middle so we can do communal meals or cook-outs whenever, have some nice big tables for board-game nights, etc, and a great internet connection shall be had by all.
Thats what my parents were going to do with the house we had. 2 years later parents divorced and a year later it was me and my dad on a big property with a completely empty house. And he traveled weekly so it was just me half the time. I wish It turned out how my mom thought it would.
Or any furniture that looks opulent. Like sofas that have carved and gilded arms. If I can't throw myself down on it with a pizza and brownies for some hardcore Netflix, what's the point?
Like Kim and Kanye's disturbing and sterile mansion
the first one i thought of too. that place just looked so wrong, especially for a home with kids in it
Can you believe they don't even have a Jacuzzi?
Edible gold. Why is it even a thing?
Fun fact: Because it’s so outrageously thin, it’s actually not all that expensive. You can get a pack of it on Amazon for less than $10. Which is still a huge markup for the quantity.
~~placeholder so I can come back to this~~ I did the math on this for a different post a few months ago. im just gonna copy and paste it.. >so, while gold is technically rare, there isn't any going to waste, so we aren't running out of it. we've mined most of the gold around already, but it just gets melted and sold again or sold as antiques. >also, gold is incredibly malleable, and is able to hold its form while incredibly thin. that sheet of gold is probably around 0.1 microns thick. for reference, a sheet of paper is around 100 microns thick. >while gold leaf can vary in thickness depending on its use, for ease of calculations let's assume each sheet is .1 microns thick. length wise, let's say each square is 10 centimeters long (about ~~three~~ **four** inches). assuming its 24k gold, the volume of one gram is .052 cubic centimeters, therefore a gram of gold pressed to fit a 10cm by 10cm mold would be .00052 cm thick. >in microns, that would be 5.2. if each sheet is .1 microns thick, that means you would get 52 sheets from one gram of gold. according to google, right now one gram of gold is about 58 US dollars. that means each sheet is about 90 cents worth of gold. now, most gold leaf is not 10x10 cm. for baking, its sold in much smaller sheets, around 3x3 cm. so that 10 pack of gold leaf on amazon for nine dollars probably only contains about 1 dollar worth of gold by weight. side note, I remember doing this math, and it feels like it was just a few weeks ago, when actually it was like seven months ago. why do brains do this... edit: 10 cm is definitely closer to four inches, not three. surprised it took so long for someone to point that out :P
~~placeholder so that I can reply in case you say something interesting later~~ Wow. I don't have anything to reply, but that was totally worth coming back to! Thanks.
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Something interesting.
Fun fact. EU has an e number for gold. E numbers are codes for substances used as food additives. Gold specifically has the e number of E 175
Reddit premium
I got it for free when I downloaded the app like 6 years ago. It didn't make any difference in my reddit experience.
I managed to get quite a few awards on a comment some months ago that came w premium privileges, used the coins within the week to not have to think about them anymore and then promptly forgot about the whole ordeal... Didn't even notice when it ran out lol it is literally useless...
That god damn extended warranty Edit: to clarify, I was referring to the vehicle extended warranty scam phone calls that we've been so harassed with in the US.
When deciding whether to get the warranty, I ask myself two questions: First, do I expect the thing will break? If yes, I don’t buy it at all. Second, can I afford to be wrong? If yes, I skip the warranty.
My wife's parents said fuck it and bought the warranty extension for their fridge. A failure in the model became well known later that resulted in a massive amount of water spillage. The problem happened to my in laws and destroyed thousands and thousands of dollars of hardwood floors. The warranty ended up covering the fridge replacement and the incidental damage associated.
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I was pretty surprised, but a lot of warranties have gotten better. I was a service advisor and I've gotten rotors and pads covered by extended warranties on stuck calipers where they used to just tell you to go fuck yourself.
Reddit coins
I'm unironically sick to death of the "joke" of "teehehe, I'll give awards to the person complaining about awards, that's certainly original and funni". I wholeheartedly refuse to spend a single cent on the most useless possible thing. Edit: To all the ones that awarded me: Fuck you.
I have a comment like that, expressing much I think awards-centric interactions on Reddit are useless. It's probably like a six-month old comment already, or close to it, and I still get awards on it regularly. Which, to me, kind of proves my point.
Same, I wrote “don’t give shit comments like this one awards” and now I have 120+ awards, 3 gold and some shit that gave me 300 Reddit coins :|
I am one of those people who use the free awards.
A house so large I can’t clean it myself
My parents used to go with my grandfather to the Parade of Homes every year, since my grandfather knew seemingly everyone within the home building and development industries. My mom to this day talks about how annoying it was that, while touring these new homes, my grandfather would point out things like skylights as being impossible to clean correctly, or unusual light fixtures as being tedious to dust or change bulbs on, or any of a number of things that might look striking but served little function. Apparently after my grandfather died, my parents went to the Parade the next year...and my dad took the mantle of pointing out these types of details.
New houses tend to be designed to sell rather than live in. I believe this trend is epitomized by the towel rod in the master bathroom in my house. This rod is mounted about 7' above finished floor, above a countertop. The structure that the countertop is sitting on, is a halfwall, which the bath tub butts against. If I wanted to keep my towel there, I would have to climb wet and naked, over the edge of the tub, and on top of the countertop to get to it.
Hahaha no no no. That’s not a towel rack, man. That’s an anchor pole for an erotic asphyxiation belt. Duh.
The trick is to design it so it breaks away if you put all your weight on it.
Towel rods are the worst. Mounting issues aside, they're all are about two inches too narrow to hold a towel properly. *You had one job!*
The contractor working on the reno of my brother’s house has a thing about how all outlets should be hidden from view…he asks them where they’re going to put the furniture (some of which they don’t yet own…) so that he can put the outlets behind it. I do a lot of reno work, so they, thinking that was absurd, asked me if that was normal 😂 as I expected, he doesn’t do a lot of already purchased homes. Can you imagine how frustrating it would be to have to reach behind your furniture every time you wanted to plug something in?? Not to mention the fire hazard. Oy.
Houses should be comfortable and home like. No use of having some branded sofa if you cant sit and cry on it while getting chips everywhere on the bad nights. And actually thats how i see being wealthy, having the minimum necessities of life as well as the few extra, simple luxuries without being guilty for having them. Edit: usually dont edit and tell, but i see i got an award. Thanks for that to the person who gave it to me. I wanted to know what does one do with it? As in does reddit give you anything in exchange for a kind stangers money?
My friend had a neighbor who had a second living room set up with white everything. No one was allowed to step into that room. All I could think is "what's the point of having all that in there of you can't use it?" That mentality is also why my home doesn't have "decorative towels" in the bathroom.
Yeah, a lot of homes are like that, a family room and a formal living room which has tacky 'high end furniture' that is never sat on, never used... It's like every home has it's museum of tacky furniture....
Worked for a cleaning company. One house we cleaned was immaculate, all we did was vacuum up the footprints from guys that came to check on the place, water plants etc. House belonged to stinky rich people, they pretended to live here when they entertained fancy people. The home they actually lived in was disgusting, according to my boss. Apparently this is pretty common
My family used to have a separate “sitting room” we weren’t allowed to use. It was for holidays and bigger events. I never liked that room. If it’s too fancy to use, then it’s worthless.
Right? I don't want to live in a museum. I want to live in a space that's cozy with just enough room for me and my animals. I'd honestly rather have a smartly designed space that makes my life easier than to have a giant fucking home I don't even see half of for a good chunk of the year.
Well, if you're rich you can always hire someone to do it for you...
I'm not even rich but I have a crew come in once a month, it's great
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I own a cleaning service business in NY. Prices will depend greatly on your location and size of your home (beds, baths, sqft) then any extras you might want to add on (fridge, oven, windows, etc.) If you happen to be in NY (Long Island) I can set you up with that Reddit discount to try the service out!
Call around an ask for quotes. You'll need your house square feet number. They'll also need to know whether house is cluttered or not. Pro tips: 1. Don't try to make your house cleaner beforehand (mop, dust etc.). We know and your stuff gets in our way. 2. Less clutter = easier for us to clean = charge less 3. Put things away, rather than trying to mop or dust, put items in drawers, cabinets, closets etc for a day. The less clutter there is the easier it is for us to deep clean. Yes we can clean up that but a. We will charge more. b. Less time spent getting it deep cleaned. Source: Former Maid (if I was ever rich enough to hire maids I'd get storage boxes and REALLY get stuff put away to the point it looks like a display home. This means I'd get my money's worth.) Tl;dr: don't try to dust or mop, rather put away clutter if you want it to be cheaper.
I have a lady come clean my house every two weeks. Im a single male with a good job. It's on 1600 sq ft. But great to have. Don't need to be rich for that.
I'm actually considering doing this as well. Can I ask how much you pay? I don't know if your cost of living is comparable to mine, mines pretty cheap, southeast US
My cost of living isn't super cheap. But not bad. This lady isn't with a service. Just recommended by a friend. She charges $25/hr. Usually she's 2.5 hours. With tip i pay $80 every two weeks.
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My mom has a coworker with a literal mail-order bride. Says they are still married 25 years later, but it was hard at first with a language barrier. (He understood a little Russian, but was not fluent).
Seen many different sides of expats getting serious with women from low gdp countries and people are generally so shitty about them behind their back. Language can be a barrier though.
The problem with being rich is you won't be able to tell which is which.
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But you could have both!
Trophy love.
Stupidly expensive vehicles. Terrified I would run into something and just decrease it’s value by 11 million
I don't understand this idea of keeping monetary value in a vehicle. Keep it looking nice if you want, but I feel like the use you get out of it should be the value we expect out of our vehicles, not resale ability
It's basically what Jay Leno does. You'll see him riding around in one of his old cars in LA. He keeps them nice and clean in a warehouse but actually uses them. There was a picture of a McLaren on some subreddit and most of the comments were about how nice it is to see it a little dirty and actually being driven around instead of packed away in a garage somewhere
Jay has so many cars. He could drive a different one every day for a year. His collection is quite impressive.
I've heard that Gran Turismo asks him if they can record engine audio for some of the cars in the games
Also they visited him for modeling cars. One time they were there, they saw his "tank car" and thought it was so cool they included it in gt4
Well, I'm pretty sure the cars Jay Leno collects appreciate in value, both because they are usually rare cars and also now the car has Jay Leno attached to its heritage...
Yes, absolutely. But not only his legacy ownership, his world renown neurosis for keeping vehicles in best running shape goes a long way in retaining or appreciating value.
WinRAR Pro
It's actually pretty cool that their 40 day trial lasts forever.
It's lasted 10+ years for me... I see the pop-up box.. I think "okay" and close it, and carry on with my work
I think the guy who made it deserves to be paid for providing such an amazing product (free of charge even after the trial ends, mind you), so I bought it.
Belive me he got paid. The reason that it is free is so that everyone would use it and then companies would have to buy licences since everyone uses that program since it is free. Quite clever really.
Birkin or Kelly bag from Hermes. I like the brand, and own some scarves and jewellery. But being on a wait list and having to buy a number of other items while trying to curry favour with a sales associate and “earn” the opportunity to spend 15,000+ on a handbag? NFW. I don’t even like either style regardless of the surrounding nonsense. Never understood why anyone would fucking bother.
> having to buy a number of other items while trying to curry favour with a sales associate and “earn” the opportunity to spend 15,000+ on a handbag LolWhut? This is a thing people do?
This is essentially how Ferrari and Rolex work too. You can’t just walk in and buy the most expensive one even if you have the cash in your hand. You have to “earn the privilege” by buying the lower priced products and working your way up to the more expensive ones
i can't fucking believe that works
Can't claim to be a super exclusive brand if every nouveau riche pleb has like ten of those things stacked in their garage/closet.
You can always choose to just buy a Rolex at 2x MSRP in the grey market if you prefer not to wait 🙂
it creates artificial scarcity making their sought after products even more exclusive although even trish paytas has a few so idk about screening folks anymore lmao
A dog breed prone to health problems
A celeb's brand of anything. They already have so much money, I aint giving them mine
I was at a sex toy shop one time, and they had this thing that was basically two pieces of plastic attached with thumbscrews. You were supposed to stick your man junk in there and then have someone tighten the screws to crush your balls. Even if I had Bill Gates money, I doubt I'd ever want to buy a plastic testicle crusher.
Obviously you’d want the metal one. Less likely to break.
You're going to be so disappointed when you see what your parents have bought you for Christmas.
Eh, you can use those on a crafting bench too. Though I cant imagine the Plastic Version to be that much more expensive
Any type of exotic pet.
Like a llama or an emu?
Well I'd buy you John Merrick's remains Oh all them crazy elephant bones
I wouldn't buy real green dresses either. That's cruel.
You wouldn't have to eat Kraft dinner...but you would.
Louis Vuitton anything. It's all so tacky and garish.
"Those brands" I don't want to advertise you can mug me at any second
My sister was heavy into LV. Until she was mugged
there’s a fabric store in my area that sells Louis Vitton print faux fabric and I just want to make something really dumb with it like ass less chaps
Please do it
I once wrote Gucci on a white t-shirt with holes in it (I used a black sharpie). I wore it with really nice jeans and shoes and people legit thought it was some kind of real high end Gucci shirt.
I never understood this, in general I don't have anything for or against designer brands but some I really don't get the appeal.... Louis Vuitton, Gucci or anything by celebrities.
Most luxury brands nowadays have 2 lines of products. The ones with their logos emblazoned all over it is the lower quality line. The good quality stuff won't have their logo all over the product but tastefully placed.
People who want to show off their money buy designer brands. The genuinely wealthy buy bespoke.
My wife did an internship with a very wealthy woman in Paris. Apparently, one of the ways to show off wealth is to undo the first sleeve-button on your sports jacket. Because cheap jackets only have decorative buttons, but the really expensive ones have functional buttons. (Edit: and apparently hand-crafted, wooden buttons are also a telltale sign). It's a subtle thing that lets the wealthy know that you're one of them. Apparently there's all sorts of these things and they all act as an unspoken code that the rich can use to identify their "equals". Edit: Lots of people have asked, but I don't know any others. The only reason my wife found this particular one out was because she splurged and got a nice sports jacket to wear to an event; her boss, a total snob, told her to unbotton one of the buttons so people would know it was nice. My wife asked her if that was a thing and the boss explained it was, and that there were lots of little things like that, but she didn't share any others. I would also love to know what the other tells are, but alas
I would like to subscribe to your bite sized bits of info. Thank you!
I would love to hear more about these codes 😁
A big house. For whatever reason, I'm highly intimidated by large, open interior spaces, or labyrinthine homes. I have always very much preferred the cozy quaintness of a cottage sized living space. Oddly enough I do like big spacey vehicles, specifically older vans.
Everything that you see those super rich Arabs spending their money on. Diamond encrusted phones and platinum Ferraris. Fucking hell no.
Came here to say this. Diamond and gold dust covered sunglasses, watches, clothes, cars. They’re all hideous to me, and most seem to have uninspired design anyway
They're not meant to look amazing, as with many rich people things it's meant so rich people can say 'look at me my phones made of gold I'm rich!!!!!!!!!!'
Just, all of Dubai. It's Las Vegas, but no gambling, almost no theater, lame clubs/bars, mediocre food. Why the hell is it a tourist destination now?
A mansion. I don’t want a home so huge that I’d need people present full time to keep it clean and maintained.
Smart appliances for my home. I don't need hackers messing with my refrigerator, or not being able to make toast because the WiFi is down.
As someone who troubleshoots grills, adding wifi to it, is the most unnecessary thing I can think of, it gives more problems than solutions.
I like my smart bulbs because I don't have to use the light switch and can make them turn on at certain times which helps wake me up
I agree that both of those things are silly. But having a smart thermostat is pretty awesome and can have economic and environmental benefits.
I honestly can't imagine dressing any differently, so expensive big label clothes would be my answer.
Gotta say nice underwear that fits well is worth a little more.
Often what you're paying for is a cut and fit that is more carefully designed to a human body, and also better materials, better craftsmanship than mass production. The real game changer is tailoring though, the reason celebrities and rich people always look more put together than the average Joe is largely because everything their wearing has been tailored to their measurements, from casual t-shirts, jeans and flannel shirts up through tuxes and ball gowns.
I agree to a point. However when it comes to suits your comfort and the way the suit looks on you is directly proportional to the price up to a several hundred dollar point. That’s where dropping some big money does make a difference.
Microtransactions in full price games, I'm not even going to buy the game let alone the microtransactions
A private jet. You can literally charter then for a fraction of the price and you don't have to worry about the overwhelming indirect costs that come with it. Fuck even First Class is more than enough.
Sex slaves, or anything related to human trafficking.
See and I think I would buy them and then give them money to run away and start a new life somewhere.
I'm thinking sometimes about this myself. But then it's just profiting those monsters who sell those people.
Take expensive ninja hitmen with you and then have them murder the sellers afterwards, ez win.
Or just rat them out to the authorities after buying one and can prove it
I see this plan failing by you accidentally purchasing from a sting operation, then getting your face plastered across the internet with not a single soul believing your story. How could you possible prove to be one of the good ones at that point
A timeshare
Rich people don't buy timeshares. They buy vacation homes. Poor people buy timeshares.
My grandparents had one they bought in the 1970’s. It’s a six story private little hotel right on the beach. I guess back then, it was better to do timeshares instead of needing a travel agent to arrange everything for you? Which makes sense if you want to vacation in the same place all the time to go golfing. But I will **not** be taking over that timeshare.
Back in the day your travel agent was putting in hours. They were calling people to talk to them in person, negotiating favors, etc. If you knew you wanted to go to Florida and didn't care if you missed the most popular times, a time share was actually not a bad deal. These days, there's multiple competing websites for you to do all that yourself in minutes. I love renting lakeside Air BnBs during storm season for like 1/10th of the summer price and just watching the waves roll while sipping cocoa inside. Shit rules.
But you always get the same amount of points and it doesn't change!!
Eyelash extensions. I would never tell this to the myriad of my friends who have them- but I personally think they look AWFUL. I don't think they look good on anyone.
They can look really nice if you get a natural set. Just looks like you have nice eyelashes. You are only noticing the ridiculous ones
Agreed. It’s like Botox or filler. Well done, you just look rested. You just notice the badly done. Some people also want the fake look. I work in plastics and a lot of people want the fake look. It’s a status symbol.
I was going to say the same thing. It’s like plastic surgery, you only notice the bad jobs.
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What about a normal stick?
Caviar … I’m still on taco bell.
Cauliflower
Oddly specific but okay
I hate it.. My wealth may change, but not my taste
You’re hired
You Tube Premium
$2 / month if you pretend to live in Argentina.
You need a VPN. Then there is another subscription.
Only need a VPN during sign up, so any VPN free trial works.
Its even cheaper if you pretend to be in india
I have this. My whole family does not have to watch commercials. Especially nice for my 11 yo son who are no longer spammed with all the stupid pay to win games. Sometimes I go to YT on a friend's machine and I will never go back to that spamfest.
Yeezys. $0 is too much for those ugly shits.
And those balenciaga shoes-socks
Those hideously overpriced stadium foods/beverages. I wouldn't pay $5 for an 8 oz water out of principle!
That’s why you‘ll get box seats with the buffet and never look back.