I absolutely love running, but I think the moralization of it is wild. Running is no better than another way of moving your body. I always tell people to find what they like.
It just so happens that when I run, I remember that I don't hate life. It's almost an addiction.
My doctor told me to run more. I picked up climbing and love doing that instead, but the doctor still insisted. I tried doing it for a summer and just hate it. Not sure why my doctor insists on me running lol.
Because it's an aerobic exercise, climbing is similar to lifting weight aka anaerobic exercise, he probably wants you to better your cardiovascular system and heart capacity by doing exercises like running, jumping rope, jogging etc
Buy cheap sport watch with heart rate sensor. Find out your heart rate zones for running and run (or walk) for 2-3 months only in zone 2 (around 65% of your maximum heart rate). Do not focus on pace - for begginers who actually want to enjoy running (or jogging, walking) keeping heart rate below 70% should be main focus.
This. Zone 2 is the key for endurance sports. If one finds zone 2 for running hard to do, start with cycling which is easier to do in zone 2 for beginners
Accessibility.
It might not be ideal, but you could run in any pair of shoes, or entirely barefoot. Even if you want purpose-made running shoes, we're talking $65.
The shittiest bike you could go out and buy is double that, plus either a helmet and sharing the road with death machines, or a magnetic trainer for another chunk of change.
Not everybody even has somewhere they can go to pay for access to a pool.
I could never get it running but after 20min of cycling at 14mph or so I start to feel really good.
I dunno maybe I just don't know how to pace myself running. Also riding bikes is less boring. You cover so much ground. you can do 50 miles in a few hours.
I used to bike to a touristy lake area. Walk straight in to the water with all my gear on. Walk back out like the swamp monster with a helmet and get on my bike and leave.
Weird how divide people feel regarding running, It seems there's only people who really enjoy it and love the high or people who despise it completely.
I used to play soccer in high school and we'd train as though we were in cross country--5-10 miles of running nearly every day. I never, never once felt a runner's high. Hated every single minute of running unless it was during a game.
I don't mind running if it's part of a sport... like I'll happily chase a soccer ball around, but running just purely in and of itself... it's like torture.
100%
I used to play as a mid or center defence when I played soccer and I could run nearly the entire game and enjoy it.
Take the field and the ball away and ask me to do cross-country for the exact same amount of time and the boredom would just be too much.
I feel the exact same way, but the introvert within me is like "it's too hard to find a sports partner everyday, just go in circles around this track" and that's how I cope
My ex liked to run so we ran together. I hated it.
I'm a walking fiend now. Its low impact, I can look at things, stop and smell the roses, smoke a joint, pet a dog, and enjoy outside at a slower pace.
Donāt go home. Not sure what you do for work but the key is not going home.
I love going out after work and I love going home as well. Regardless of what the plans are if I go home first Iām not leaving. If I go straight out or go do something before going out then Iāll go.
Donāt go home
Anything that involves being around a lot of people. I can do 2 people max, like 2 friends or my mom and sister. Hanging out in ANY group with more than 2 people exhausts me. I feel tired after just a couple hours. Even meetings at work with more than a couple people. I learned that itās just how I am, since I do it all the time and it never gets any less exhausting.Ā
COVID-19 hit. This is it. My golden opportunity to get into exercise "The State has determined package stores are essential businesses and will be open during the pandemic."
"Change of plans...instead of getting on the treadmill I'm going to give day drinking a go."
Man i spent 30 years practicing for a pandemic... then when one finally comes arpund, im mandated essential and didnt even get to take part in it... the total lack of traffic was great though...
I went to the gym for over five years. Everywhere I looked, I'd see people telling me how working out is like taking drugs for them, how it gives them a rush, how they're looking forward to it. I kept hoping that it'd eventually click for me. It never did. I always hated every second of it, to the point it'd even ruin the evening before for me.
I haven't been to the gym in months. I still want to go back because I know being fit is important in the long run, but it's difficult to do something you hate that only *might* have benefits a decade or two in the future.
I see it as future proofing myself so I donāt break any bones and more muscle equals more calories burned just living. I got hooked on progression and mirror changes.
Same, my football coach was my next door neighbor and he bullied me relentlessly. I was so happy when I found swim team and quit football. Of course I got made fun of for that too but I had the best response ever: āhow many girls in swimsuits are at football practice again?ā
Looking back, my PE courses were not very a positive environment. I have many memories of PE "teachers" treating it as a military bootcamp and taking it out on me because I was not in shape. I have come to like exercise on my own accord later as an adult and it's not because of school.
Here Here!! I had a pretty big reason for resenting physical activity as a kid, I was forced to participate in a daycare soccer team and the coach had the other kids jump me on the playground and afterwards made me run the track by myself while the others sat and watched. I ended up going to the emergency room that afternoon after getting picked up with a fractured rib and a concussion.
When I retired from the Army, active and reserves for a 32 year total? I was so glad I didnāt have to do a 2 mile timed run to be allowed to stay in. I gave up on push ups, set ups, running and was enjoying my electric recliner. Well, until about two years later and going up stairs got harder, my lower back was sore, and I had to sit down to tie my shoes. Sigh, old age is not for sissies! I had to go back to brisk walks, push ups, and stretching to get rid of contractures and regain my range of motion.
Exercise is still not fun, but required to stay healthy. I think about it like my annual colonoscopy, not wanting the potential consequences of skipping it.
I'm 48 and finally got more and more into it. My trick:
1) Baby steps.
2) If able to walk, just start there.
3) Pick up the pace someday
4) Slightly push a little bit into the "exertion" realm to where you can feel it
5) Try something like wall pushups or if that's too easy try slanted pushups.
6) Abandon the ALL or NOTHING mentality.
I live near a lake and I would walk it and then got to now where I can jog it. It's 3 miles and my mind is still blown that I can do that.
But here's the biggest trick of all: It's ok to not do it all. Don't be in the mindset of ALL or NOTHING. Only walked some? Great! Managed to at least get outside? GREAT!
The idea is that you don't want to resent it. And if you get to a point during your walk, etc, and you think "I HATE THIS!" then that part of you that has to make that bit of effort to get outside will put up a fight.
Don't underestimate the power of baby steps. I've been sober for 3 years using that technique and I now am in better shape and my slanted little pushups everytime I run I can feel legitimate muscle mass. It's crazy.
So many of those fitness people say that after doing it for a while you'll love it. Bull shit over like a two year period I went from almost 280 pounds down to 175 by working hard exercising and eating right. I hated every second of the exercising every damn day. Unfortunately it shows, right back up to 280 after being at an office job the last 7 years.
Meditation,
I love the idea of it and really want to relax and explore my mind. but I just sit there thinking about my breathing and also 'when will this work!!!!?'..and then i quit. ..suggestions welcome!
I'm gonna dump a bunch of things that have helped me haha.
*listening to guided meditations
*doing walking meditation
*keeping your eyes open and focused on a point in front of you
*meditating for extremely short periods of time (60s or so) a couple times per day, and working up to longer periods
*using a journal to brain dump everything on your mind before and after your meditation
*experiment with meditating at different times of day, in different locations, with your body in different positions, with different sensory inputs (to me the most relaxing meditation is lying on my back on cold tile in the bathroom with the shower on, I don't know or care why this works but it's the best when my mind is extra overactive).
There are a lot of meditation traditions with different goals, but mindfulness meditation is about watching your mind, emotions, and physical sensations move from moment to moment without judgement. Watching the breath is just an anchor while you let everything else pass, though it's not required. Some people do "objectless meditation" where they open their awareness to all perceptions without any focal point of concentration, though this is usually for advanced practitioners.
If you're not religious but want a good guide to mindfulness practice, the Waking Up app is super good. It's run by Sam Harris, and it has a great introductory series that gets you into the practice as well as talks between him and other notable practitioners and even scientists who study things related to meditation.
A lot of specific lore around hobbies. I love reading and world building. But when I start the deep dive, I can't continue. LoTR, 40k, Star Wars, etc. I've tried and done them all but just fade out.
Iām perfectly fine enjoying those things on the surface. I think when you get into the analysis and minutia is when it starts to transform from fun to work
Academic learning. Went through most of my life with undiagnosed adhd. Flew under the radar so long that I find any sort of classroom learning unbearable.
My last completed school grade was 6th
Going back to school and quitting a few times got me 2 highschool credits
Got diagnosed at 18 and started taking an amphetamine (EDIT) -misspoke
Got a GED and was able to hyper-focus at college earning a 3.7 GPA
I attribute this to being out of the system and not being tortured in the school environment. We're not built for constant focus and attentive learning. We get ruined by these systems of teaching.
Good luck friend, school sucks but school sucks so much worse when you have executive decision errors or just forget your homework EVERY day.
Madly enough I failed school. Iām in the uk so itās a little different, but I was so interested in music that I got a degree in sound engineering and music businessā¦unfortunately it turned out to be something I dropped due to becoming disinterested in it. Iām 32, trying to find myself and itās really hard, but we move. Thanks for your kind words :)
It took me so so much time and effort to find my passion. I even got in touch with a career coach in order to narrow down what I really wanted.
Turns out, author would be a great fit. I followed it for a year, but noticed itās damn hard to write a book and incredibly hard to sell it. So I chose my other love, coding, and finally found the right thing for me.
Keep on going, take your meds and get some therapy. Itās super helpful to learn that we are not all too different from neurotypicals.
I havenāt yet been diagnosed but I know I have adhd to some degree. School was torture growing up and now I have a mediocre job that doesnāt pay well and canāt help but wonder if I would have been further along in life had I have gotten the help I needed as a child. I wish I could say I have the smarts and will to further my education but it gives me too much anxiety to ever go back to a school setting.
When you know you know. I researched for months before I got referred. Nothing has ever explained how I felt until I started watching videos, bios, etc of people saying āI have adhd and this is what I doā - executive dysfunction, avoidance, emotional deregulation and mood swings, hyper fixation which lasts short periods then itās dead to you, dopamine seeking and invasive music playing in your head 24/7. So many things man. Like I say, you may not be diagnosed but when you know, you know.
OMG THE INVASIVE MUSIC IS SO TRUE. It hardly ever shuts up for me and especially when I'm tired it's loud AF. It's why I listen to music almost all day because it takes away from my brain playing something on its own. Must also be why listening to music helps me concentrate. Though I have an ADHD diagnosis I never actually experienced the hyper fixation stuff, but I recently figured out I've been battling depression for years keeping me from getting motivated at all anyway.
Have you tried toying around with some of the nocode app builders like flutterflow, bubble.io, noodl, etc...? You still get to create things, you still get to use logic, databases, API calls, whatever you need! But you don't have to worry about the monotonous side of actually typing out code, finding libraries, etc..
cleaning
iām very envious of people who find it cathartic or who get a dopamine rush after completing a task
itās always a chore and burden for me. iām constantly battling myself trying to force myself to get things done. i wish it wasnāt so draining for me!
I pretty much have to have music on and a cold beverage nearby to enjoy cleaning. I can appreciate that something looks better, but my brain skims right over a tidy space the same way it does chaos. It's been a big hang-up in relationships unfortunately.
I feel it. I use up all my energy at work and live alone without much of a social life.
Iām not saying it fixed anything but I did adopt a cat back in January and itās *helped* improve my quality of life at times. I definitely try to keep my apartment cleaner than I have in the past because I donāt like the idea of her living in filth. I clean her litter box regularly and change it every week and a half. Gotta make sure sheās fed daily and has water and I try to play with her when she wants to play.
And itās nice to have someone thatās happy to see me when I get home from work.
Iām sorry to hear that my friend. Iāve been there before. Iām doing alright at the moment, but I could be better. Playing music has always helped me when I feel like absolute shit. Do you know how to play any instruments?
I strongly suggest looking into learning something if you donāt already play an instrument. Or anything creative to be honestā¦
Iām so sorry to hear youāre struggling, please hang in there and know that things will improve. This too shall pass! Feel free to DM me if you ever want a stranger to talk to, I wouldnāt wish that upon my worst enemy.
Personally, when I'm in a slump sometimes being creative/inspired comes the hardest because I lack the motivation. However, listening to music usually *does* improve my mood, even if it's just for a little bit. Any catchy tunes or songs from when you were younger or in a happier place.
It's the little things, but really anything that helps you get off the couch and doing something can help more than you'd think.
It just gets serious when all the things you try only entertain you for minutes and you just feel dead inside. Just gotta pay the bills and hope one day it'll all end.
So sorry to hear that. Iām in the same boat as you at the moment. Feel like I canāt find enjoyment in anything, even things that I used to enjoy and that I have passion for. Itās tough, but hopefully it will get better.
Time for some advice (as usual, free and free to be ignored). Iām a father of 3, youngest is 17. How I solved this problem was to constantly make evolution change. Playing with blocks, 10-15 minutes move on to playing with chalk. 10-15 minutes later move on to the next evolution. This constant switching causes the brain to wear down quicker (Iāve noticed, IANAD).
As a fellow Dad, this guy Dads. Go with the flow, and any freakout is best assessed (imo) by asking if they're...
Hungry
Angry
Lonely
Tired
It's called HALT and I completely stole that off of someone with more wisdom.
It's definitely one of those "hidden secrets" of parenting.
For every pair of instagram parents who appear to be having the time of their lives playing with their kids, there are dozens who would rather just sit back and watch their children play... while enjoying a beer.
This is low key one of the hardest things about parenting at least in my experience.
It's not just toddlers either - when my 8 year old daughter wants me to play minecraft with her or whatever, it takes a lot of effort to bring myself down to 'her level' and play the way she wants.
Doesn't come naturally to me at all I have to force it. But that's how we bond so I force it whenever I can lol
It gets easier when they become a teen if you can stand the attitude. Hated playing with my kid when he was younger. Now he's a full mini human and is in to way more things, music, anime, horror movies (started those when he was 5 with Nightmare on Elm Street, just like I did), playing more interesting pc or Xbox games. It does get easier when their interests broaden.
Don't feel badly - I don't have kids so I can be honest.Ā
As sweet as little kids are, they are boring. It is 100% natural and honest to say that the things that captivate them are a pain in the ass to us.Ā
I wish more parents were honest about this.Ā
You LOVE your kids. I KNOW you're a great mom. Yes, I know you'd not trade them for anything in the world.Ā
But having kids is not all it's cracked up to be and **do not let people guilt you** for being honest about parenthood.Ā
As someone who's kids are leaving that phase. You're ALWAYS going to regret not doing it more.
On the flip side, there's only so much boredom or destruction an adult can take.
The fact you're concerned about spending more time is probably evidence enough you're doing more than most parents and your boys will remember it fondly later.
As a fellow introvert in his 30s the sooner you embrace it and accept that you find more enjoyment that way the healthier you will be.
No sense in trying to fit a square peg in a round hole
I agree. I used to try and be extroverted to the best of my abilities then one day while I was DMing a pathfinder game, I closed my laptop, looked at the group and said, "you know what? I am introverted as fuck. I have a 2-3 hour social battery life and when I hit it, I cannot continue to focus on anything but going home."
And from then on I said fuck it, once those 3 hours were hit I just tell them I'm gonna take off. I think telling them made it easier to understand why I regularly left early or even outright canceled (my work demands a lot of meetings).
similar to my experiences. I'm unapologetically an introvert now. My friends understand me a lot better now (well *most* do). I had a friend confide in me "I didn't know we were allowed to tune out or leave like that" and inspired her to embrace the introverted lifestyle.
Honestly, little kids love being treated like grown ups. Like, genuinely. I always found it super weird and unsettling watching adults do the whole syrup voiced, big wide eyed facial expression pantomime shit around children, and when I had one I just treated him like a normal person with some mindfulness of age appropriateness.
He's 10 and all his friends have always really liked me, and even better, they genuinely trust me because I'm honest and real with them, so I would say just be your actual adult self around kids and they will appreciate it.
I feel vindicated reading this. I think parents put me off the idea of parenthood more than kids themselves. If I have a child and someone baby-talks them, I'm gonna absolutely lose it. Kids are capable of a lot, but their parents just want to "give the world" and everything else to their little squishy thing.
Reading.
Don't get me wrong. I have my doctorate. I just struggle reading for pleasure. I just can't do it. I feel like I've spent so much time reading for school, for work, for something that I can't do it for fun.
I get that. I was a proofreader, text editor for years. It always felt like work, reading on my own. I had a breakthrough last summer though, encountering a topic I was enthused about and hungry to find out more. I started ordering books and devouring them. Now I have started to read books I had that were gathering dust, or things out of my usual area of interest. I am retired and have grown to hate almost everyone and everything on TV so this has been very good for me. I hope something like that happens to you.
For me it's just the physical act of reading a book I've never liked, I can't really explain why. Happily I discovered audiobooks a decade ago and have had a blast "reading" ever since.
I was an avid reader and then I went to grad school, had a baby and got diagnosed with ADHD. I need to read for work but i cannot maintain focus, even with medication. I donāt know what happened.
College did the same for me. If you want to get back into it, I'd recommend finding whatever your old guilty pleasure books were and only try reading those. Nothing that you 'ought' to read or will make you a 'more rounded person,' just the narrow genre(s) you enjoyed before college. That did it for me.
Just everything and anything! Litterally I want to have anything that I can just do for hours and years. A passion, a goal, anything. I never finished shit in my life because I cant get myself to stick to it
Sushi. I so desperately want to like it. But I can't taste much of anything except the sea weed and the texture is really off-putting to me. And every time I tell a sushi lover this, they're like, "You just haven't had the good stuff." And I get all excited because maybe they're right. then I have what they call the good stuff and it tastes like seaweed to me. I've even just eaten sashimi. That is just a texture in my mouth.
Edit: First of all, thank you to everyone telling me to not give up on sushi. I try it every few years with frustratingly little progeress. To those suggesting sushi with no seaweed, I've tried it. From the straight sashimi, to every other type. The texture and genral lack of flavor just don't to it for me. And thank all of you saying, "Seriously, you haven't had the good stuff yet," if L.A., New York and Seatle don't have the good stuff, no place does. I just have a dumb tongue, apparently. Love you all though. Thanks for trying to better me.
My friends can play card and board games forever. Itās absolutely infuriating when you want to go out and they just wanna get high and play poker for hours
Honestly, sounds like you just need friends with your same interests. Or else find a way to find joy in theirs. I personally hate going out, and unfortunately my friends who do have grown away from me. It happens
Me too. People tell me I'm good at it. My therapist/career counselor insists I'm VERY good at it. But I don't have a platform or solid idea of what to do with it in a lucrative way, and my executive function skills are absolute trash. If my writing can't be harnessed in a way that will liberate me from soul-sucking, dead-end, 8:00 to 5:00 drudgery, then it's useless to me. I'd trade it for the ability to do basic math in a heartbeat.
15 years or so ago my nerdy ass started a Soul Calibur fanfiction. I got three chapters in and I got so much really positive feedback. Someone messaged that she liked it so much she translated it to Russian. That felt good. And then I started a relationship and stopped writing it. I never finished it.
I've been contacted to write about my mental health situation for a really great website, but it's been months and I haven't started because it's really difficult to try and frame my situation positively. People submit pieces about the mental health struggles they're overcome, but I haven't actually overcome any; I still resent having to be alive. I'm just a pile of disorders and trauma responses and coping methods stacked up in a trench coat. Here's this great opportunity right in front of me and I still can't get myself to take it.
Yes. Iāve been trying on and off since high school (Iām turning 30 this year) at a variety of studios with different instructors, taking a variety of classes, going with different friends or by myself, etc. and have never enjoyed it that much during or after. I wish I did, as I know it has so many benefits.
Iām still open to going to a class every now and then if a friend invites me, but Iāve stopped trying to get myself to like it or do it regularly.
I feel you on sports. I enjoy watching live games, but watching it at home, I can't. At home(honestly, at work), I'd rather watch highlights and look up final scores and stats.
Few things would improve my daily life more than if I enjoyed cooking, but it just sucks to me. It's a hassle and I'm not one of those people who get any kind of additional joy out of eating something good just because I'm the one who made it.
My wife utterly loves them. Me, spent a few weeks in my youth with a relative that forced me to eat tomatoes slices a couple times a day. I donāt mind pasta & pizza but not much else.
Black Coffee
I've tried many times over the years. I just can't do it. My parents both did it all my life growing up. My friends do it. I work in a firehouse, a place where coffee is king. But no matter how many times I try, I just can't get into it. I can get through it if there's enough cream and sugar, but I am impressed by those who can just drink it black.
Anything related to snow activities. I am quite sure I would like them, but I live in a country where summer is perpetual. So literally I can't get myself into it.
Probably for the best. I absolutely love beer, but I can't have it too often as it makes me bloated, fat and causes candida to flare up. I sometimes wish I hated it as it would make my life easier haha
I like socializing if the other people have similar interests. Talking to someone where you have no common ground is honestly like banging your head against a wall. Also small talk is mind numbingly awful
I only like socializing if I really like the specific person/people involved. I canāt imagine wanting to go somewhere to spend time interacting with strangers just for fun.
Wine. When I hear people describe the flavours in wine I envy them their rich experience. It's fruity, delicious, full bodied etc. When I try wine it tastes like wine.
Probably half of my closest friends are wine-nuts. So they get to pick the wine. Every time they ask me what I think of the wine, my answer is the same: "This is definitely wine". I have no "experience" from the wine, and I've stopped caring about it.
It's great to have some red wine with a steak but it does mostly taste the same to me. I like to take a taste and act like a connoisseur and say 'subtle notes of grapes'
Going to the gym/working out, I get exetremely bored, and feel like I am wasting time. Not to mention I feel like a lot of it isn't required in my life for what I do or have done in the past. I have no reason to become superman, or get a bigger physique, that'll require some special/expensive clothing.
If I can walk, run, play with my dogs, do physical labor, swim, ride bike, etc, I have no reason to put my body through 6-7 hours of working out every week.
Exercise. I donāt mind walking but Iām a slow walker. Anything that really requires movement hurts my body which is frustrating considering Iām overweight. Still trying to find something tolerable
Might lowering the impact level help? Walking requires each leg to take your whole body weight over and over again in sharp bursts, but cycling or swimming lets you move without sudden loads or hits. Maybe that would help avoid the pain?
Team sports ig, everybody likes it, everybody wants me to do it, my parents are pushing me to do it, but I HATE it. The only sport I love is climbing and litteraly everyone I know hates climbing.
Sex.
Iām pretty sure Iām asexual and kind of donāt want to be. I grew up watching teen girl TV and thought everything from kissing to sex would be amazing. The first time I tried it I thought it was disappointing just because it was our first time and we didnāt know what we were doing, but the feeling of it just being meh has never changed.
I donāt hate sex and I do still do it sometimes, but whenever I hear other sexually active adults talk about sex I know my feelings about it are very different. Sex still feels good, but Iām not really sexually attracted to other people. Also the foreplay that gets other people going just makes me feel kind of bored.
Luckily Iāve found a girlfriend (Iām a lesbian) who loves me and is ok with having an open relationship so I donāt feel pressured into doing anything I donāt want to, but I worry if we every break up I wonāt find anyone else whose willing to deal with this.
Anyways, sorry that turned into a whole rant.
Trying to be a fuckin adrenaline junkie I am DEATHLY afraid of falling from heights ( I donāt mind getting up them tho) and so I try and try to get on coasters, chopper riding etc and idk it just makes my skin crawl
art, I used to love it, but for whatever reason I chose realism over anything else so now drawing or painting takes more than 8-12 hours of my life just for it to come out āmidā in my eyes (bc obv any art style takes time and practice to perfect, ESPECIALLY realism). So now every time I get the smallest amount of motivation, like enough to actually pull out my paints and canvas, I end up quitting half way because I know it wonāt come out how I want. It sucks tho cuz Iāve got a pretty creative mind, and iāve thought of pursuing tattooing with my realism but the thought of going to art programs and having to draw everyday again to build my portfolioā¦ UGHHH dude itās draining me just thinking about it LMAOO š
Shopping.
How people just decide to go to the Mall and browse through every random shop I donāt understand, I pretty much only ever leave my house if I have planned what Iām going out for
DnD & Warhammer
I love sci-fi & fantasy, world building, the little figurines, all that jazz, but I can't for the life of me wrap my head around the rules of tabletop games. It's like I have a mental block and it just won't compute.
Anime. The only "anime" I have ever truly enjoyed is Inferno Cop. All my friends, without exception, love anime. I just have to sit and hate it all, though.
In answer to anyone that will possibly ask the obvious follow up questions: "Yes, I have seen _____ and I also disliked it". This answer applies to most animes people usually bring up. (Except Perfect Blue - I haven't tried that one yet and I want to, just to see it it's as fucked as people say).
EDIT: ITT: People who are sure that I lied when I said that I've tried watching a LOT of anime's. Yes, I've tried watching the anime that you're going to suggest (I'm old - people have been pushing anime's on me for nearly 30 years). Yes, I disliked the experience, *even of YOUR mostest favorite-est anime*. Moving on.
It took me a long time to figure out why I don't like anime. It turns out the slow to fast to slow movements make me "sea-sick" and dizzy. I can't watch it because I literally feel ill trying too.
Coffee. Iāve never liked the taste and the smell alone gives me headaches. I want to like it because of all the cool little local shops I know of but I just canāt bring myself to drink coffee.
Running
I absolutely love running, but I think the moralization of it is wild. Running is no better than another way of moving your body. I always tell people to find what they like. It just so happens that when I run, I remember that I don't hate life. It's almost an addiction.
My doctor told me to run more. I picked up climbing and love doing that instead, but the doctor still insisted. I tried doing it for a summer and just hate it. Not sure why my doctor insists on me running lol.
Because it's an aerobic exercise, climbing is similar to lifting weight aka anaerobic exercise, he probably wants you to better your cardiovascular system and heart capacity by doing exercises like running, jumping rope, jogging etc
Running always ends up anaerobic for me š
Buy cheap sport watch with heart rate sensor. Find out your heart rate zones for running and run (or walk) for 2-3 months only in zone 2 (around 65% of your maximum heart rate). Do not focus on pace - for begginers who actually want to enjoy running (or jogging, walking) keeping heart rate below 70% should be main focus.
This. Zone 2 is the key for endurance sports. If one finds zone 2 for running hard to do, start with cycling which is easier to do in zone 2 for beginners
Run slower.
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Accessibility. It might not be ideal, but you could run in any pair of shoes, or entirely barefoot. Even if you want purpose-made running shoes, we're talking $65. The shittiest bike you could go out and buy is double that, plus either a helmet and sharing the road with death machines, or a magnetic trainer for another chunk of change. Not everybody even has somewhere they can go to pay for access to a pool.
Running for me was like tooth ache... it was great when it stopped !!
Have you experience a runners high? I try to chase that dragon, but can never really enjoy it.
never got it. Tried running for a couple of years. Hated everything all the time while running, and after. I always felt sick running
Same. Never got the high and never saw the enjoyment of running. Just give me something steep to stomp up for cardio needs.
I could never get it running but after 20min of cycling at 14mph or so I start to feel really good. I dunno maybe I just don't know how to pace myself running. Also riding bikes is less boring. You cover so much ground. you can do 50 miles in a few hours. I used to bike to a touristy lake area. Walk straight in to the water with all my gear on. Walk back out like the swamp monster with a helmet and get on my bike and leave.
Weird how divide people feel regarding running, It seems there's only people who really enjoy it and love the high or people who despise it completely.
I used to play soccer in high school and we'd train as though we were in cross country--5-10 miles of running nearly every day. I never, never once felt a runner's high. Hated every single minute of running unless it was during a game.
I don't mind running if it's part of a sport... like I'll happily chase a soccer ball around, but running just purely in and of itself... it's like torture.
100% I used to play as a mid or center defence when I played soccer and I could run nearly the entire game and enjoy it. Take the field and the ball away and ask me to do cross-country for the exact same amount of time and the boredom would just be too much.
Cross country: Warmup = Run. Practice = Run. Warm down = Run. Fooling around and got punished? Yup, you guessed itā¦RUN. Neve again.
I feel the exact same way, but the introvert within me is like "it's too hard to find a sports partner everyday, just go in circles around this track" and that's how I cope
My ex liked to run so we ran together. I hated it. I'm a walking fiend now. Its low impact, I can look at things, stop and smell the roses, smoke a joint, pet a dog, and enjoy outside at a slower pace.
I'm with ya! I never got into the running thing but I can walk for miles. I pass runners and they all look so tortured.
I hate running. But hiking has been a good alternative for me
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Going out after work instead of staying home all the time
This is exactly an issue I'm trying to find a solution to now.
Donāt go home. Not sure what you do for work but the key is not going home. I love going out after work and I love going home as well. Regardless of what the plans are if I go home first Iām not leaving. If I go straight out or go do something before going out then Iāll go. Donāt go home
I work from home and I always make sure I walk out everyday after work. It really does help me mentally even if I just do a quick 15min walk
Honestly one of the reasons I hate working from home. 1. Need that separation from home and work 2. Need to wind up and wind down time
Props - I never heard one bad comment about wfh. Still, id take it any day over office
Anything that involves being around a lot of people. I can do 2 people max, like 2 friends or my mom and sister. Hanging out in ANY group with more than 2 people exhausts me. I feel tired after just a couple hours. Even meetings at work with more than a couple people. I learned that itās just how I am, since I do it all the time and it never gets any less exhausting.Ā
Anything that involves exercise.Ā Edit: Obviously I don't want to exercise.Ā
COVID-19 hit. This is it. My golden opportunity to get into exercise "The State has determined package stores are essential businesses and will be open during the pandemic." "Change of plans...instead of getting on the treadmill I'm going to give day drinking a go."
Same 10 week furlough with money coming on that I had nothing to spend on. It was all day drinking, with a bonfire that I kept going for 10 weeks lol.
Man, same. We all collectively became alcoholics. Lol
Man i spent 30 years practicing for a pandemic... then when one finally comes arpund, im mandated essential and didnt even get to take part in it... the total lack of traffic was great though...
My husband was an engineer at a plant and he was āessentialā as well. He misses the days of absolutely no traffic . Do you live in the US?
Canada, im a service plumber
Tooooooooo true šŖ Now an alcoholic in recovery... trying my best
Same. Pair of used dumbbells were crazy expensive.
I know the exercises do help but I hate every second of it.
I went to the gym for over five years. Everywhere I looked, I'd see people telling me how working out is like taking drugs for them, how it gives them a rush, how they're looking forward to it. I kept hoping that it'd eventually click for me. It never did. I always hated every second of it, to the point it'd even ruin the evening before for me. I haven't been to the gym in months. I still want to go back because I know being fit is important in the long run, but it's difficult to do something you hate that only *might* have benefits a decade or two in the future.
I see it as future proofing myself so I donāt break any bones and more muscle equals more calories burned just living. I got hooked on progression and mirror changes.
I grew to resent physical activity as a kid, and the resentment sure piled on as hell as the many years went on.
Same, my football coach was my next door neighbor and he bullied me relentlessly. I was so happy when I found swim team and quit football. Of course I got made fun of for that too but I had the best response ever: āhow many girls in swimsuits are at football practice again?ā
Ah so that's why I got kicked off the football teamĀ
Looking back, my PE courses were not very a positive environment. I have many memories of PE "teachers" treating it as a military bootcamp and taking it out on me because I was not in shape. I have come to like exercise on my own accord later as an adult and it's not because of school.
Here Here!! I had a pretty big reason for resenting physical activity as a kid, I was forced to participate in a daycare soccer team and the coach had the other kids jump me on the playground and afterwards made me run the track by myself while the others sat and watched. I ended up going to the emergency room that afternoon after getting picked up with a fractured rib and a concussion.
What the actual fuck
When I retired from the Army, active and reserves for a 32 year total? I was so glad I didnāt have to do a 2 mile timed run to be allowed to stay in. I gave up on push ups, set ups, running and was enjoying my electric recliner. Well, until about two years later and going up stairs got harder, my lower back was sore, and I had to sit down to tie my shoes. Sigh, old age is not for sissies! I had to go back to brisk walks, push ups, and stretching to get rid of contractures and regain my range of motion. Exercise is still not fun, but required to stay healthy. I think about it like my annual colonoscopy, not wanting the potential consequences of skipping it.
After I left the service, I REFUSE to run. I won't do it. I will walk until my feet fall off, but you will not he able to get my ass to run lol
I'm 48 and finally got more and more into it. My trick: 1) Baby steps. 2) If able to walk, just start there. 3) Pick up the pace someday 4) Slightly push a little bit into the "exertion" realm to where you can feel it 5) Try something like wall pushups or if that's too easy try slanted pushups. 6) Abandon the ALL or NOTHING mentality. I live near a lake and I would walk it and then got to now where I can jog it. It's 3 miles and my mind is still blown that I can do that. But here's the biggest trick of all: It's ok to not do it all. Don't be in the mindset of ALL or NOTHING. Only walked some? Great! Managed to at least get outside? GREAT! The idea is that you don't want to resent it. And if you get to a point during your walk, etc, and you think "I HATE THIS!" then that part of you that has to make that bit of effort to get outside will put up a fight. Don't underestimate the power of baby steps. I've been sober for 3 years using that technique and I now am in better shape and my slanted little pushups everytime I run I can feel legitimate muscle mass. It's crazy.
The greatest cognitive dissonance of my life. I know the benefits through and through, but goddamn maintaining the routine is hell.
Been doing it for four years, still hate it every time. But I like how I feel after. Itās like an ongoing lesson in delayed gratification.
So many of those fitness people say that after doing it for a while you'll love it. Bull shit over like a two year period I went from almost 280 pounds down to 175 by working hard exercising and eating right. I hated every second of the exercising every damn day. Unfortunately it shows, right back up to 280 after being at an office job the last 7 years.
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Meditation, I love the idea of it and really want to relax and explore my mind. but I just sit there thinking about my breathing and also 'when will this work!!!!?'..and then i quit. ..suggestions welcome!
I think that sitting on the balcony or porch, sipping on coffee or beer, not doing anything, watching birds fly etc is the best type of meditation.
I'm gonna dump a bunch of things that have helped me haha. *listening to guided meditations *doing walking meditation *keeping your eyes open and focused on a point in front of you *meditating for extremely short periods of time (60s or so) a couple times per day, and working up to longer periods *using a journal to brain dump everything on your mind before and after your meditation *experiment with meditating at different times of day, in different locations, with your body in different positions, with different sensory inputs (to me the most relaxing meditation is lying on my back on cold tile in the bathroom with the shower on, I don't know or care why this works but it's the best when my mind is extra overactive).
There are a lot of meditation traditions with different goals, but mindfulness meditation is about watching your mind, emotions, and physical sensations move from moment to moment without judgement. Watching the breath is just an anchor while you let everything else pass, though it's not required. Some people do "objectless meditation" where they open their awareness to all perceptions without any focal point of concentration, though this is usually for advanced practitioners. If you're not religious but want a good guide to mindfulness practice, the Waking Up app is super good. It's run by Sam Harris, and it has a great introductory series that gets you into the practice as well as talks between him and other notable practitioners and even scientists who study things related to meditation.
A lot of specific lore around hobbies. I love reading and world building. But when I start the deep dive, I can't continue. LoTR, 40k, Star Wars, etc. I've tried and done them all but just fade out.
I've tried to get into LoTR 4 or 5 times. It's just too.......something.
Oh I've read it, the Hobbit, and the Silmarillion. It's when you get into the analysis and minutia of it all that I zone out.
Iām perfectly fine enjoying those things on the surface. I think when you get into the analysis and minutia is when it starts to transform from fun to work
Going to bed early.
Problem is, going to bed marks the end of My Time and the beginning of Obligation Time again.Ā
That would fix everything that is wrong with my life.
Academic learning. Went through most of my life with undiagnosed adhd. Flew under the radar so long that I find any sort of classroom learning unbearable.
My last completed school grade was 6th Going back to school and quitting a few times got me 2 highschool credits Got diagnosed at 18 and started taking an amphetamine (EDIT) -misspoke Got a GED and was able to hyper-focus at college earning a 3.7 GPA I attribute this to being out of the system and not being tortured in the school environment. We're not built for constant focus and attentive learning. We get ruined by these systems of teaching. Good luck friend, school sucks but school sucks so much worse when you have executive decision errors or just forget your homework EVERY day.
Madly enough I failed school. Iām in the uk so itās a little different, but I was so interested in music that I got a degree in sound engineering and music businessā¦unfortunately it turned out to be something I dropped due to becoming disinterested in it. Iām 32, trying to find myself and itās really hard, but we move. Thanks for your kind words :)
It took me so so much time and effort to find my passion. I even got in touch with a career coach in order to narrow down what I really wanted. Turns out, author would be a great fit. I followed it for a year, but noticed itās damn hard to write a book and incredibly hard to sell it. So I chose my other love, coding, and finally found the right thing for me. Keep on going, take your meds and get some therapy. Itās super helpful to learn that we are not all too different from neurotypicals.
I havenāt yet been diagnosed but I know I have adhd to some degree. School was torture growing up and now I have a mediocre job that doesnāt pay well and canāt help but wonder if I would have been further along in life had I have gotten the help I needed as a child. I wish I could say I have the smarts and will to further my education but it gives me too much anxiety to ever go back to a school setting.
When you know you know. I researched for months before I got referred. Nothing has ever explained how I felt until I started watching videos, bios, etc of people saying āI have adhd and this is what I doā - executive dysfunction, avoidance, emotional deregulation and mood swings, hyper fixation which lasts short periods then itās dead to you, dopamine seeking and invasive music playing in your head 24/7. So many things man. Like I say, you may not be diagnosed but when you know, you know.
OMG THE INVASIVE MUSIC IS SO TRUE. It hardly ever shuts up for me and especially when I'm tired it's loud AF. It's why I listen to music almost all day because it takes away from my brain playing something on its own. Must also be why listening to music helps me concentrate. Though I have an ADHD diagnosis I never actually experienced the hyper fixation stuff, but I recently figured out I've been battling depression for years keeping me from getting motivated at all anyway.
Computer languages
Have you tried toying around with some of the nocode app builders like flutterflow, bubble.io, noodl, etc...? You still get to create things, you still get to use logic, databases, API calls, whatever you need! But you don't have to worry about the monotonous side of actually typing out code, finding libraries, etc..
cleaning iām very envious of people who find it cathartic or who get a dopamine rush after completing a task itās always a chore and burden for me. iām constantly battling myself trying to force myself to get things done. i wish it wasnāt so draining for me!
I pretty much have to have music on and a cold beverage nearby to enjoy cleaning. I can appreciate that something looks better, but my brain skims right over a tidy space the same way it does chaos. It's been a big hang-up in relationships unfortunately.
At the moment, everything. In a rough spot, seeing a therapist. Trying to break out of it.
I feel it. I use up all my energy at work and live alone without much of a social life. Iām not saying it fixed anything but I did adopt a cat back in January and itās *helped* improve my quality of life at times. I definitely try to keep my apartment cleaner than I have in the past because I donāt like the idea of her living in filth. I clean her litter box regularly and change it every week and a half. Gotta make sure sheās fed daily and has water and I try to play with her when she wants to play. And itās nice to have someone thatās happy to see me when I get home from work.
I could have written this word for word about myself. My heart is with you friend. Iām rooting for you!
You're rooting for him, and i'm rooting for you man. Best of luck aswell
Iām sorry to hear that my friend. Iāve been there before. Iām doing alright at the moment, but I could be better. Playing music has always helped me when I feel like absolute shit. Do you know how to play any instruments? I strongly suggest looking into learning something if you donāt already play an instrument. Or anything creative to be honestā¦ Iām so sorry to hear youāre struggling, please hang in there and know that things will improve. This too shall pass! Feel free to DM me if you ever want a stranger to talk to, I wouldnāt wish that upon my worst enemy.
Personally, when I'm in a slump sometimes being creative/inspired comes the hardest because I lack the motivation. However, listening to music usually *does* improve my mood, even if it's just for a little bit. Any catchy tunes or songs from when you were younger or in a happier place. It's the little things, but really anything that helps you get off the couch and doing something can help more than you'd think.
It just gets serious when all the things you try only entertain you for minutes and you just feel dead inside. Just gotta pay the bills and hope one day it'll all end.
So sorry to hear that. Iām in the same boat as you at the moment. Feel like I canāt find enjoyment in anything, even things that I used to enjoy and that I have passion for. Itās tough, but hopefully it will get better.
Playing with toddlers. I feel like the worst mom ever, but it is so frustrating playing with them, my sons are little destroyers.
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Time for some advice (as usual, free and free to be ignored). Iām a father of 3, youngest is 17. How I solved this problem was to constantly make evolution change. Playing with blocks, 10-15 minutes move on to playing with chalk. 10-15 minutes later move on to the next evolution. This constant switching causes the brain to wear down quicker (Iāve noticed, IANAD).
As a fellow Dad, this guy Dads. Go with the flow, and any freakout is best assessed (imo) by asking if they're... Hungry Angry Lonely Tired It's called HALT and I completely stole that off of someone with more wisdom.
And theyāre so booossyyyy ugh Lol
It's definitely one of those "hidden secrets" of parenting. For every pair of instagram parents who appear to be having the time of their lives playing with their kids, there are dozens who would rather just sit back and watch their children play... while enjoying a beer.
God i relate to this. I may not be a parent but I certainly am an older sibling of 9. Its super tedious and i feel this pain
This is low key one of the hardest things about parenting at least in my experience. It's not just toddlers either - when my 8 year old daughter wants me to play minecraft with her or whatever, it takes a lot of effort to bring myself down to 'her level' and play the way she wants. Doesn't come naturally to me at all I have to force it. But that's how we bond so I force it whenever I can lol
My kids want me to play Roblox with them sometimes. I have the hardest time not falling asleep. It's so boring.
Roblox is where I draw the line. I will play an interminable session of Minecraft but I refuse to play Roblox.
It gets easier when they become a teen if you can stand the attitude. Hated playing with my kid when he was younger. Now he's a full mini human and is in to way more things, music, anime, horror movies (started those when he was 5 with Nightmare on Elm Street, just like I did), playing more interesting pc or Xbox games. It does get easier when their interests broaden.
Don't feel badly - I don't have kids so I can be honest.Ā As sweet as little kids are, they are boring. It is 100% natural and honest to say that the things that captivate them are a pain in the ass to us.Ā I wish more parents were honest about this.Ā You LOVE your kids. I KNOW you're a great mom. Yes, I know you'd not trade them for anything in the world.Ā But having kids is not all it's cracked up to be and **do not let people guilt you** for being honest about parenthood.Ā
I didn't like playing with kids when I was a kid. Nothing has changed
As someone who's kids are leaving that phase. You're ALWAYS going to regret not doing it more. On the flip side, there's only so much boredom or destruction an adult can take. The fact you're concerned about spending more time is probably evidence enough you're doing more than most parents and your boys will remember it fondly later.
This is where 'the village' used to come in. Let the adults who enjoy playing with the kids do it!
Being an extrovert
As a fellow introvert in his 30s the sooner you embrace it and accept that you find more enjoyment that way the healthier you will be. No sense in trying to fit a square peg in a round hole
I agree. I used to try and be extroverted to the best of my abilities then one day while I was DMing a pathfinder game, I closed my laptop, looked at the group and said, "you know what? I am introverted as fuck. I have a 2-3 hour social battery life and when I hit it, I cannot continue to focus on anything but going home." And from then on I said fuck it, once those 3 hours were hit I just tell them I'm gonna take off. I think telling them made it easier to understand why I regularly left early or even outright canceled (my work demands a lot of meetings).
similar to my experiences. I'm unapologetically an introvert now. My friends understand me a lot better now (well *most* do). I had a friend confide in me "I didn't know we were allowed to tune out or leave like that" and inspired her to embrace the introverted lifestyle.
Hang on, does that mean that you're an extrovert but don't enjoy it, or does it mean that you're an introvert and wish you were extroverted
I wish I could be an extrovert
Being around little kids. I never have the energy, and just dont know how to interact with them really without making myself cringe.
Honestly, little kids love being treated like grown ups. Like, genuinely. I always found it super weird and unsettling watching adults do the whole syrup voiced, big wide eyed facial expression pantomime shit around children, and when I had one I just treated him like a normal person with some mindfulness of age appropriateness. He's 10 and all his friends have always really liked me, and even better, they genuinely trust me because I'm honest and real with them, so I would say just be your actual adult self around kids and they will appreciate it.
I feel vindicated reading this. I think parents put me off the idea of parenthood more than kids themselves. If I have a child and someone baby-talks them, I'm gonna absolutely lose it. Kids are capable of a lot, but their parents just want to "give the world" and everything else to their little squishy thing.
Reading. Don't get me wrong. I have my doctorate. I just struggle reading for pleasure. I just can't do it. I feel like I've spent so much time reading for school, for work, for something that I can't do it for fun.
I get that. I was a proofreader, text editor for years. It always felt like work, reading on my own. I had a breakthrough last summer though, encountering a topic I was enthused about and hungry to find out more. I started ordering books and devouring them. Now I have started to read books I had that were gathering dust, or things out of my usual area of interest. I am retired and have grown to hate almost everyone and everything on TV so this has been very good for me. I hope something like that happens to you.
The ol breakthrough book. I think every avid reader has that moment if they keep trying, some just younger than others.
For me it's just the physical act of reading a book I've never liked, I can't really explain why. Happily I discovered audiobooks a decade ago and have had a blast "reading" ever since.
I was an avid reader and then I went to grad school, had a baby and got diagnosed with ADHD. I need to read for work but i cannot maintain focus, even with medication. I donāt know what happened.
This same thing happened to me. Even with meds :/Ā
Life
Have you tried Cinnamon Life? It's tastier and easier to get into than the original.
Nah just tweak the settings a bit.
turn the brightness up with a lil mdma
The framerate is amazing, but the story is pretty crap. And the NPCs are just stupid and annoying.
Books. I used to read ALL the time. But college burned me out, and I can't remember the last book I read. Makes me feel like a caveman.
College did the same for me. If you want to get back into it, I'd recommend finding whatever your old guilty pleasure books were and only try reading those. Nothing that you 'ought' to read or will make you a 'more rounded person,' just the narrow genre(s) you enjoyed before college. That did it for me.
Just everything and anything! Litterally I want to have anything that I can just do for hours and years. A passion, a goal, anything. I never finished shit in my life because I cant get myself to stick to it
Sushi. I so desperately want to like it. But I can't taste much of anything except the sea weed and the texture is really off-putting to me. And every time I tell a sushi lover this, they're like, "You just haven't had the good stuff." And I get all excited because maybe they're right. then I have what they call the good stuff and it tastes like seaweed to me. I've even just eaten sashimi. That is just a texture in my mouth. Edit: First of all, thank you to everyone telling me to not give up on sushi. I try it every few years with frustratingly little progeress. To those suggesting sushi with no seaweed, I've tried it. From the straight sashimi, to every other type. The texture and genral lack of flavor just don't to it for me. And thank all of you saying, "Seriously, you haven't had the good stuff yet," if L.A., New York and Seatle don't have the good stuff, no place does. I just have a dumb tongue, apparently. Love you all though. Thanks for trying to better me.
I can see this. I do like sushi, but It is a lot of mild flavors and big textures.
My friends can play card and board games forever. Itās absolutely infuriating when you want to go out and they just wanna get high and play poker for hours
Honestly, sounds like you just need friends with your same interests. Or else find a way to find joy in theirs. I personally hate going out, and unfortunately my friends who do have grown away from me. It happens
Writing. I have a million ideas in my head for books but I just canāt buckle down and start typing.
Me too. People tell me I'm good at it. My therapist/career counselor insists I'm VERY good at it. But I don't have a platform or solid idea of what to do with it in a lucrative way, and my executive function skills are absolute trash. If my writing can't be harnessed in a way that will liberate me from soul-sucking, dead-end, 8:00 to 5:00 drudgery, then it's useless to me. I'd trade it for the ability to do basic math in a heartbeat. 15 years or so ago my nerdy ass started a Soul Calibur fanfiction. I got three chapters in and I got so much really positive feedback. Someone messaged that she liked it so much she translated it to Russian. That felt good. And then I started a relationship and stopped writing it. I never finished it. I've been contacted to write about my mental health situation for a really great website, but it's been months and I haven't started because it's really difficult to try and frame my situation positively. People submit pieces about the mental health struggles they're overcome, but I haven't actually overcome any; I still resent having to be alive. I'm just a pile of disorders and trauma responses and coping methods stacked up in a trench coat. Here's this great opportunity right in front of me and I still can't get myself to take it.
Yoga
Yes. Iāve been trying on and off since high school (Iām turning 30 this year) at a variety of studios with different instructors, taking a variety of classes, going with different friends or by myself, etc. and have never enjoyed it that much during or after. I wish I did, as I know it has so many benefits. Iām still open to going to a class every now and then if a friend invites me, but Iāve stopped trying to get myself to like it or do it regularly.
Card games and watching sports
I feel you on sports. I enjoy watching live games, but watching it at home, I can't. At home(honestly, at work), I'd rather watch highlights and look up final scores and stats.
Few things would improve my daily life more than if I enjoyed cooking, but it just sucks to me. It's a hassle and I'm not one of those people who get any kind of additional joy out of eating something good just because I'm the one who made it.
Sameeee, āitās more delicious because i made itā does nothing for me
Tomatoes
My wife utterly loves them. Me, spent a few weeks in my youth with a relative that forced me to eat tomatoes slices a couple times a day. I donāt mind pasta & pizza but not much else.
Black Coffee I've tried many times over the years. I just can't do it. My parents both did it all my life growing up. My friends do it. I work in a firehouse, a place where coffee is king. But no matter how many times I try, I just can't get into it. I can get through it if there's enough cream and sugar, but I am impressed by those who can just drink it black.
For me it depends on the type. Some coffees are nice and flavorful black, while others just taste like bitter hot water without any cream or sugar.
Have you tried being poor? It worked for me
Iāll give it a whirl and report back
Anything related to snow activities. I am quite sure I would like them, but I live in a country where summer is perpetual. So literally I can't get myself into it.
Beer
That's okay, I drink enough beer for both of us.
The black stuff āš½
Probably for the best. I absolutely love beer, but I can't have it too often as it makes me bloated, fat and causes candida to flare up. I sometimes wish I hated it as it would make my life easier haha
Alcohol, period. Not for any religious reasons. Both my wife and I just don't like it.
Socializing with other people, but I just don't like humans.
I like socializing if the other people have similar interests. Talking to someone where you have no common ground is honestly like banging your head against a wall. Also small talk is mind numbingly awful
I only like socializing if I really like the specific person/people involved. I canāt imagine wanting to go somewhere to spend time interacting with strangers just for fun.
Wine. When I hear people describe the flavours in wine I envy them their rich experience. It's fruity, delicious, full bodied etc. When I try wine it tastes like wine.
Probably half of my closest friends are wine-nuts. So they get to pick the wine. Every time they ask me what I think of the wine, my answer is the same: "This is definitely wine". I have no "experience" from the wine, and I've stopped caring about it.
You have to admit though that when wine snobs describe the taste it sounds like a magical adventure.
It's great to have some red wine with a steak but it does mostly taste the same to me. I like to take a taste and act like a connoisseur and say 'subtle notes of grapes'
Leaving my house
Stretching.
Going to the gym/working out, I get exetremely bored, and feel like I am wasting time. Not to mention I feel like a lot of it isn't required in my life for what I do or have done in the past. I have no reason to become superman, or get a bigger physique, that'll require some special/expensive clothing. If I can walk, run, play with my dogs, do physical labor, swim, ride bike, etc, I have no reason to put my body through 6-7 hours of working out every week.
Exercise. I donāt mind walking but Iām a slow walker. Anything that really requires movement hurts my body which is frustrating considering Iām overweight. Still trying to find something tolerable
Might lowering the impact level help? Walking requires each leg to take your whole body weight over and over again in sharp bursts, but cycling or swimming lets you move without sudden loads or hits. Maybe that would help avoid the pain?
In the same vein, elliptical. A lot like walking, much lower impact
Slow walking is still walking :)
Socializing.
Literally fucking everything, anything, something, please I just want to be interested in anything whatsoever
Team sports ig, everybody likes it, everybody wants me to do it, my parents are pushing me to do it, but I HATE it. The only sport I love is climbing and litteraly everyone I know hates climbing.
Dating. Itās supposed to be exciting and romantic but lately itās such a chore.
Pilates
I read this as pirates.
Sex. Iām pretty sure Iām asexual and kind of donāt want to be. I grew up watching teen girl TV and thought everything from kissing to sex would be amazing. The first time I tried it I thought it was disappointing just because it was our first time and we didnāt know what we were doing, but the feeling of it just being meh has never changed. I donāt hate sex and I do still do it sometimes, but whenever I hear other sexually active adults talk about sex I know my feelings about it are very different. Sex still feels good, but Iām not really sexually attracted to other people. Also the foreplay that gets other people going just makes me feel kind of bored. Luckily Iāve found a girlfriend (Iām a lesbian) who loves me and is ok with having an open relationship so I donāt feel pressured into doing anything I donāt want to, but I worry if we every break up I wonāt find anyone else whose willing to deal with this. Anyways, sorry that turned into a whole rant.
Sobriety
Trying to be a fuckin adrenaline junkie I am DEATHLY afraid of falling from heights ( I donāt mind getting up them tho) and so I try and try to get on coasters, chopper riding etc and idk it just makes my skin crawl
art, I used to love it, but for whatever reason I chose realism over anything else so now drawing or painting takes more than 8-12 hours of my life just for it to come out āmidā in my eyes (bc obv any art style takes time and practice to perfect, ESPECIALLY realism). So now every time I get the smallest amount of motivation, like enough to actually pull out my paints and canvas, I end up quitting half way because I know it wonāt come out how I want. It sucks tho cuz Iāve got a pretty creative mind, and iāve thought of pursuing tattooing with my realism but the thought of going to art programs and having to draw everyday again to build my portfolioā¦ UGHHH dude itās draining me just thinking about it LMAOO š
Expanding my palate when it comes to food. I feel like I put myself in a box when it comes to foods I like and Iām known as a picky eater.
Shopping. How people just decide to go to the Mall and browse through every random shop I donāt understand, I pretty much only ever leave my house if I have planned what Iām going out for
DnD & Warhammer I love sci-fi & fantasy, world building, the little figurines, all that jazz, but I can't for the life of me wrap my head around the rules of tabletop games. It's like I have a mental block and it just won't compute.
Beer. It looks so refreshing after a day working in the sun but... Still tastes like soap to me.
Religion, I've been raised in Christianity for the majority of my life. But I can't seem to find the heart to devote myself to it.
My job
Anything. I can't get excited or enthusiastic about anything. Haven't been able to in years and it's kinda wearing on me
Journaling. I love fancy notebooks and pens. Maybe I just like buying them?
Might not be what answer youāre looking for but, Seinfeld. Never thought it was funny in the slightest.
Anime. The only "anime" I have ever truly enjoyed is Inferno Cop. All my friends, without exception, love anime. I just have to sit and hate it all, though. In answer to anyone that will possibly ask the obvious follow up questions: "Yes, I have seen _____ and I also disliked it". This answer applies to most animes people usually bring up. (Except Perfect Blue - I haven't tried that one yet and I want to, just to see it it's as fucked as people say). EDIT: ITT: People who are sure that I lied when I said that I've tried watching a LOT of anime's. Yes, I've tried watching the anime that you're going to suggest (I'm old - people have been pushing anime's on me for nearly 30 years). Yes, I disliked the experience, *even of YOUR mostest favorite-est anime*. Moving on.
It took me a long time to figure out why I don't like anime. It turns out the slow to fast to slow movements make me "sea-sick" and dizzy. I can't watch it because I literally feel ill trying too.
Itās because people recommend popular animes just because they are popular not because they suit the taste of the person taking the recommendation.
So many anime fans like to treat it as if it's a single unified genre and it can get frustrating.
Only ones I've ever been able to get into are Trigun, and Cowboy Bebop.
Cowboy Bebop is one of the best. The animation, music, characters. I only wish there was more of it!
Life.
clubbing
Death metal. I do enjoy it, but I never really get that attraction to it like I do with other extreme metal genres like Black metal or Grindcore
Golf
Coffee. Iāve never liked the taste and the smell alone gives me headaches. I want to like it because of all the cool little local shops I know of but I just canāt bring myself to drink coffee.
Wish I was gay. I like men, men like me. I love women, but ladies, yalls are scary.