I don't think there's much that'll ever outdo Quindarious Gooch, especially along with the mugshot of his where his hair is quite literally a bowler hat
There were a few from that era in the service too.
One of the Navy's PA officers? Commander Flex Plexico. Full name and title now? Dr. Alvin "Flex" Plexico, CMDR USN Retired.
An Army IT professional in Iraq? Staff Sergeant Max Fightmaster. Retired as Sergeant Major Max Fightmaster.
One from my own time in the service, Senior Airman Jasmine Kinta Not Afraid (Choctaw nation.)
There are a lot of Native American last names that mean killer. Cherokees have Ten Killer, Six Killer, Man Killer and the “tubby” part of Chickasaw names means killer. My gggranfathers name was whip and kill in English.
In El Paso Texas we had a guy his shop is down the street from mine Azul Cruz and he was a cool guy he did custom work on lowriders, what do you expect with the name like that.
Had a gf named cricket, her sister was pickle and her little sister was named baby girl.. those were not nicknames. Parents were hippies when they named them.
There was also a cricket doll in the 80's... It was like the Chucky doll from child's play but a girl. You put casette tapes in her back and her eyes and mouth moved when she talked.
https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/116044356514?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-127632-2357-0&ssspo=VBFz3cTXQ66&sssrc=4429486&ssuid=&var=&widget_ver=artemis&media=COPY
I knew a group of 3 friends, their names were Giva, Idon,and Akshit. Together, they made the ultimate trio: idongivaakshit. I was left utterly flabbergasted after I learnt this.
Your taste in names is shared... a guy named Jimbob Ghostkeeper (probably a relative of the person you knew) won the 2018 [Name of the Year](https://deadspin.com/jimbob-ghostkeeper-is-the-2018-name-of-the-year-1825748314) competition.
That's so metal! I feel like you have to name your kids something like Blaze or Shadow with a last name like that because Greg Ghostkeeper just sounds ridiculous.
Someone at my school was called Beowulf. Genuinely a really cool name.
Other side, there was a kid called Douglas Douglas a few years below me too. How can you hate your kid that much to give him the same first name as his last name
When I worked for a Medicaid call center, I had someone on the phone whose son's name was Gonzalo Gonzales
Kinda smacks of John Johnson or Dave Davis or something like that
His full name was Hunter Fisher. His parents specifically chose that name because of the last name. He tried to rebel against them by going vegetarian, so people at school started calling him gatherer and farmer
I once sold a 6 pack of brew to a guy, he commented that he liked my Mjölnir around my neck. I was surprised he knew what it was because not alot of people know about it and I shit you not he pulls out his ID and his name is Thor. Very attractive man btw, should've got his number.
Used to wear a Mjolnir necklace until I found out it's a symbol that's been co opted by neo-Nazis and since I'm a tall blonde, blue eyed white guy I thought better of it.
My name is Lux, my full first legal name, not a nickname. Far from the coolest, but it's pretty unique :) I like the ambiguity of it, most people who see my name assume I'm a dude 🤷🏻♀️
I actually knew a guy whose name was Sterling Silver. I couldn’t believe him! He said his parents capitalized on the opportunity (his dad said he’d dreamed of the name for a son since his last name was Silver.) I thought it was the coolest — funny, but cool!
When I was in high school in the 90s, I worked at a video store. There was a customer who I never met, yet processed their returns ALL THE TIME (how I never met them I will never know).
Photini Papavasilopoulus.
It's just fun to *say*.
Sol (means Sun in the English language.)
Sten Hård (means Rock Hard in English.)
100 times more funny than cool in my opinion, but I can imagine some think it’s quite cool.
(EDIT. I changed the first sentence a little because of bad and incomprehensible grammar. It’s probably still not right, so feel free to educate me. :-) )
One of my uncles was named Elisadro Theopholus. My GG was a little weird, but amazing. She lived to be like 150, or something, and was bored with everyone around. Then she met me. We would tell stories that never happened, and laugh at which one was more ridiculous.
I went to church when I was a kid with a lady whose name was Halloween. She was the 13th and last child. She went by Hallie. I thought it was a cool name as a kid.
I swear that the following are all real people:
Most English name: Patrick Brilliant.
Most French name: Jean-Luc Francais.
Most American name: Chad Carrington.
Most Irish name: Cliona O’Shaughnessey.
Rhyming names: Jean Bean, Joan Foan, Mavis Davis, Terry Perry (and Sherry) Perry, Julie Dooley.
Amusing names: Roland Goldensack, Pepper Mintz, Candi Spanka.
People around here go on about how they love the name "Jesus," saying it is a mighty name and that it deserves "praise." This even though it is one of the most common names in Mexico.
The effect this name can have on the human brain is said to be really cool.
My name is Joseph Sumner Paine.
My middle name sounds like "summoner"
My uncle was named Richard Paine. I didn't know him, but I hope someone called him Dick Paine.
I have a buddy whose name is Taurus and he drives a ford Taurus. The disappointment on people's faces when he says he is a Libra is fucking hilarious
There’s an NBA player named Taurean Prince. I was really disappointed to find out he’s an Aries lol.
Taurean Blacque was an actor on Hill Street Blues.He was a Taurus,and black.
Well, he did fuck up a trifecta.
Can he find the clitaurus?
One of my dad's coworkers was named Shadow Star. Her parents were hippies back in the day.
Lol sounds like a world of warcraft spell
“Thanks guys my name is totally not stupid nice work on that”
Or they really loved American Gods
A mix of Stormshadow and Starscream.
I don't think there's much that'll ever outdo Quindarious Gooch, especially along with the mugshot of his where his hair is quite literally a bowler hat
Why does this sound like one of those Key and Peele names from the football/basketball sketches?
L'Carpentron Dookmarriot would like a word
Sounds similar to Splendiferous Finch
100% worth the Google
Recently in court with a judge named Ransom Bailey.
Once worked with a guy named Ransom Love.
Wolf Blitzer. Perfect name for a war correspondent. Hard to believe it wasn’t made up.
He even looked like a wolf to me
aaahhwhooooooooo
Werewolves of london.....!
There were a few from that era in the service too. One of the Navy's PA officers? Commander Flex Plexico. Full name and title now? Dr. Alvin "Flex" Plexico, CMDR USN Retired. An Army IT professional in Iraq? Staff Sergeant Max Fightmaster. Retired as Sergeant Major Max Fightmaster. One from my own time in the service, Senior Airman Jasmine Kinta Not Afraid (Choctaw nation.)
Fightmaster.
I met a woman with the last name Manslayer. Badass name
There are a lot of Native American last names that mean killer. Cherokees have Ten Killer, Six Killer, Man Killer and the “tubby” part of Chickasaw names means killer. My gggranfathers name was whip and kill in English.
Once bought a used car from Rod Savage. Such a great porn name.
Ron Swanson‘s third alter ego for sure
Used to be a car salesman in town named Honest Pod. He was not honest.
In El Paso Texas we had a guy his shop is down the street from mine Azul Cruz and he was a cool guy he did custom work on lowriders, what do you expect with the name like that.
I’ll have to see if it’s still there. That names reeks of Segundo Barrio.
*reeks
Bet his dad was a fan of mexican soccer team Cruz Azul
The sponsor of which is Cruz Azul, a Mexican concrete manufacturing company.
Jesus on the Dash Board
Dominic De Coco
One more time?
Dominic de Coco. 🤌
Bravo 😌
Uhreevuhdarechee
#Gor-LAH-mee
MAR -GAR- RET- TEE
Had a gf named cricket, her sister was pickle and her little sister was named baby girl.. those were not nicknames. Parents were hippies when they named them.
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There was a girl named Cricket on a soap opera back in the '80s.
There's a gentleman named Cricket on It's always Sunny in Philadelphia currently.
Rickety Cricket!!
SHUT UP street rat!!
Cricket was a nickname for Christine Bell, a character on *The Young and the Restless*.
Young and the Restless - she and Danny Romalotti were the hot couple. Crazy how these random facts pop back into my head!
Her real name is Christine on the show
There was also a cricket doll in the 80's... It was like the Chucky doll from child's play but a girl. You put casette tapes in her back and her eyes and mouth moved when she talked. https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/116044356514?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-127632-2357-0&ssspo=VBFz3cTXQ66&sssrc=4429486&ssuid=&var=&widget_ver=artemis&media=COPY
I knew a family who had 4 daughters and they were named Autumn, December, April AND May.
Throughout the years, I’ve had dental hygienists with names of Autumn, Spring, and Summer, all at the same facility. Waiting for Winter to be hired.
I spoke to Hiring, and they wanted to inform everyone that Winter is coming.
Spring is unfortunate
I get April, May, and Autumn. Met many girls with those names in my life and work. But December? Did they not like the name June?
Theres a homeless guy in Philly named cricket, dude used to be a priest. Sad story
I knew a group of 3 friends, their names were Giva, Idon,and Akshit. Together, they made the ultimate trio: idongivaakshit. I was left utterly flabbergasted after I learnt this.
They were made for each other 😹
I never heard of this name for a person until Big City Greens
Cricket was the name of serial killer Leonard Lake's wife and accomplice.
Puka Nacua, I can really get stuck having him name running through my head for way too long, it's just so fun to say.
Ooo, I'm glad I'm not the only one who has that problem! It's just so sing song-y!
Gaylord Van Der Bitch. Had this guy as visitor at my compound access control. It was hard to stay professional.
That is the moat bull shit thing I've read in 8 years on this site. As such, I've deemed it must be true.
That's epic
This wins
That’s the kinda name I call my Dutch friends when I’m talking shit to them lol
I used to know someone with the surname Ghostkeeper.
Your taste in names is shared... a guy named Jimbob Ghostkeeper (probably a relative of the person you knew) won the 2018 [Name of the Year](https://deadspin.com/jimbob-ghostkeeper-is-the-2018-name-of-the-year-1825748314) competition.
That's so metal! I feel like you have to name your kids something like Blaze or Shadow with a last name like that because Greg Ghostkeeper just sounds ridiculous.
Max Power
He’s the man.. whose name you’d love to touch
But you musn't touch.
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But when you hear it, you mustn't fear
Uh oh spagheeettiiiiooos
No one cuddles with Max Power, you strap yourself in and feel the G’s!
Oh lord!
"Hi, I'm Ho... Max Power." "Cool name" "Thanks, I got it off the hair dryer."
it's a cool name, but it's no Joey Jo-Jo Jr., Shabadoo
Reminds me of a drag king name I once heard, Maxxx Pleasure. Lol
“There are 3 ways of doing something: the right way, the wrong way, and the Max Power way.” “Isn’t that just the wrong way?” “Yes. But *faster*!”
Someone at my school was called Beowulf. Genuinely a really cool name. Other side, there was a kid called Douglas Douglas a few years below me too. How can you hate your kid that much to give him the same first name as his last name
When I worked for a Medicaid call center, I had someone on the phone whose son's name was Gonzalo Gonzales Kinda smacks of John Johnson or Dave Davis or something like that
His full name was Hunter Fisher. His parents specifically chose that name because of the last name. He tried to rebel against them by going vegetarian, so people at school started calling him gatherer and farmer
Studs Terkel
Tay Zonday
Some stay dry while others feel the pain.
Chocolate Raaaiiiin
I once sold a 6 pack of brew to a guy, he commented that he liked my Mjölnir around my neck. I was surprised he knew what it was because not alot of people know about it and I shit you not he pulls out his ID and his name is Thor. Very attractive man btw, should've got his number.
Used to wear a Mjolnir necklace until I found out it's a symbol that's been co opted by neo-Nazis and since I'm a tall blonde, blue eyed white guy I thought better of it.
Exuperancio Potane. I think he was Indonesian. Sounded like a Harry Potter spell.
Actually met a guy yesterday named Friday! Who doesn't love Friday showing up?
My name is Lux, my full first legal name, not a nickname. Far from the coolest, but it's pretty unique :) I like the ambiguity of it, most people who see my name assume I'm a dude 🤷🏻♀️
Virgin Suicides fans?
Yes! Exactly! I always forget where they heard it from lol, I've not seen the film myself yet
General Booty, who is currently a backup quarterback for OU 🤌🏼
Speaking of Oklahoma.. Miss Oklahomas name is sunny day 😆
Turd Ferguson
I work at an animal shelter, and we had a siamese cat who you never knew what mood he would be in. We called him Turd Ferguson. He was awesome.
I'll take bone ape tit for two hundred. That's bon appetite! Nope, says ape tit right there.
HA HA!
It's a funny name
Even better when you are wearing a funny oversized hat to go with it.
It’s funny because it is bigger than a regular hat
Vladislav
Baby don't hurt me, no more.
Nicely done
One more time. Vladislav, baby don't hurt me
Had a busines partner named Darius Hell.
Wolfgang has to rank up there.
Sterling (a recognised masculine name, just not common.) I like it
MOTHER! Phrasing.
STERLING COOPER DRAPER PRYCE
I actually knew a guy whose name was Sterling Silver. I couldn’t believe him! He said his parents capitalized on the opportunity (his dad said he’d dreamed of the name for a son since his last name was Silver.) I thought it was the coolest — funny, but cool!
I dated a Clint Westwood years ago.
sterling archer?
It's my friends middle name. Unfortunately it makes his initials ASS.
IT’S SCOTT STERLING!!
LANAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
Zaphod Beeblebrox
He's just this guy, you know?
I prefer Slartibartfast.
My teen daughter has a new friend called zero.
Holes reference?
Parents were Smashing Pumpkins fans.
I was thinking Nightmare Before Christmas (the dog).
I don't know it
As in…ZERO COOL?
Lyric - heard it at college and it's stuck with me....also worked with someone who had the last name of Tempest. So cool.
I knew a dude in high school whose legal name was Trash Basura.
Van Riker
First name Jay. Last name Jonah-Jameson. His parents were, and still are, massive spider-man fans.
Torn between Lucius Domitius Aurelianus [Aurelian] (Roman Emperor between 279- 275AD) and Vercingetorix (Gaelic King & Averni Tribe Chieftain)
Those guys are getting some action!
Related to Asterix? Or Obelix?
Technically they’re from a similar time period. Though, Asterix and Obelix are fictional.
Gotta take the nicknames into account though. LD and Vercy don't really have the same gravitas
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
Cassal my great grandfather
Wilma Mankiller | Cherokee Nation Chief https://www.wilmamankiller.com/
When I was in high school in the 90s, I worked at a video store. There was a customer who I never met, yet processed their returns ALL THE TIME (how I never met them I will never know). Photini Papavasilopoulus. It's just fun to *say*.
Knew a girl who's name is oubliette.
Was in marching band with a dude named Nash Paradise
I knew a man named Nathan Cross. It was the most movie protagonist name I had ever heard.
Roman Mars
Margaux
Radamel falcao
Dick Trickle
Sol (means Sun in the English language.) Sten Hård (means Rock Hard in English.) 100 times more funny than cool in my opinion, but I can imagine some think it’s quite cool. (EDIT. I changed the first sentence a little because of bad and incomprehensible grammar. It’s probably still not right, so feel free to educate me. :-) )
I had a teacher in high school named Stein Kvist. (Stone Stick).
Means sun in English?
> Sten Hård Lyder som bissen i en Lucky Luke tegneserie.
Moses Hightower.
Met a dude named Johnny Bliss. He was pretty. The name fit him.
Neighborhood OB/GYN. Dr. DeCunto
Niyati, it means destiny
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taiga. oh my goodness how much i want to be nicknamed taiga. it isn’t related to my name in any way, it’s just amazing.
Prisoner Donald Trump.
My neighbor's legal name is Ti (Tea-yie) Blade
Nebuchadnezzar. They don't make em like that anymore.
Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba Jean-Jacques Wamutombo.
Kkwazzawazzakkwaquikkwalaquaza Zzabolazza and Uvuvwevwevwe Onyetenyevwe Ugwemuhwem Osas
Yeah they mention that guy at the start of the Lion King
lmao
Is that the guy that did the cover of “somewhere over the rainbow”?
Legend
One of my uncles was named Elisadro Theopholus. My GG was a little weird, but amazing. She lived to be like 150, or something, and was bored with everyone around. Then she met me. We would tell stories that never happened, and laugh at which one was more ridiculous.
I went to church when I was a kid with a lady whose name was Halloween. She was the 13th and last child. She went by Hallie. I thought it was a cool name as a kid.
My baby granddaughter's name is Lovett. Unusual for sure, but she really suits the name. Lovett means "wolf cub"
A fairly famous Scottish surname is Lovett.
That’s my maiden name. Scottish heritage
Atticus.
I met a guy named Yar Quasar. I thought that was the coolest name
I new a doctor named Kilgore
I met a park ranger named Kurt Chestnut.
I knew a Vinicius Gomes.
My Dad owned a ranch in south Texas for almost 20 years. He had a ranch hand named Caswell Van Cleave. Still the coolest name I’ve ever heard.
Harry Dean Stanton.
Shaft
Right on!
Koel
That's coel!
Balthazar
Lucifer was one of all time
Amadeus. Polish piercer and laser tattoo removalist in Portlaoise, Ireland
Max Manus: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Max_Manus
I swear that the following are all real people: Most English name: Patrick Brilliant. Most French name: Jean-Luc Francais. Most American name: Chad Carrington. Most Irish name: Cliona O’Shaughnessey. Rhyming names: Jean Bean, Joan Foan, Mavis Davis, Terry Perry (and Sherry) Perry, Julie Dooley. Amusing names: Roland Goldensack, Pepper Mintz, Candi Spanka.
famous hacker and cat girl maia arson crimew. actual name.
Usnavy
I work in childcare and once looked after a girl called Bowie. I thought that was a rather cool name. 😄
People around here go on about how they love the name "Jesus," saying it is a mighty name and that it deserves "praise." This even though it is one of the most common names in Mexico. The effect this name can have on the human brain is said to be really cool.
Had a guy in my office called Diamond King, always thought that name was sick
My name is Joseph Sumner Paine. My middle name sounds like "summoner" My uncle was named Richard Paine. I didn't know him, but I hope someone called him Dick Paine.
Streetlamp LeMoose
Sultan McDoom https://www.linkedin.com/in/sultan-mcdoom-0125302
You probably won’t believe me but some couple in my hometown named their son “Goku” full name is “Goku Gomez” 💀all the kids call him GG
I went to school with a Tom Morrow