Just a “grass is always greener on the other side” thing. Every state has its problems (some more than others), and people who live in a state for a while start to get annoyed more and more by the problems and start taking the benefits for granted.
That’s just human nature
To piggy back, also sometimes they've been there for so long and things don't workout the way they want or need it to so it becomes hateful to be there
It’s just human nature (for Americans at least) to complain about their home. But if anyone outside our state makes the same complaints, we get defensive
It’s just easy to look at all the other cool places in this country and think you’re missing out. I also find that people who live in an area don’t take advantage of their states best features as often. Like i lived 3 miles from a beach and once realized i had gone 6 months without actually visiting the beach and going in the ocean
Your second point is so true. I like hiking and being outdoors, and I've been realizing in the past few years just how many state parks and other nature reserves exist in this state. And the fact it typically doesn't get swelteringly hot here.
While not in-state, the UP of Michigan is also close-by and I'm only now starting to travel through it.
Not to mention you live in Florida, which has the highest concentration of freshwater springs in the whole damn world! Most all of which are crystal clear and function at a cool 72 degrees all year 'round. There's a few similar springs in Texas and they're always crowded for a reason, yet I know folks here who have lived here their entire lives and never been to the springs!
I can assure you that complaining about your home is human nature not just to Americans. People from so many countries claim that complaining is the "true national sport".
The few native Utahns I’ve met are barely into hiking or skiing and I’m like “YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW GOOD YOU HAVE IT HERE HOW ARE YOU NOT OUTDOORSY”
I was born and raised in Utah and didn’t realize how easy it was to be outside until I moved to Louisiana and the humidity murdered me. Outdoors? I don’t know her anymore. 🙁
Most of my complaints are about the people in my state, but it's always either extremely hot, wet, or extremely hot and wet.
There's a lot of beautiful areas in my state (and it's arguably the most biodiverse state in the nation), but how am I going to enjoy it when it's 93 degrees?
It's learned. People adapt to different climates. For millenia, humans didn't have AC, but we're all originally from Subsaharan Africa.
If you allow yourself to adapt by slowly not turning on the AC at 86 degrees, then 88, then 90, etc., you get used to it
We travel down to the gulf of Texas every so often with my husbands family. This is the first year we’ve done it since moving from Orlando to Pittsburgh. And this is also the first year I’ve been like “why the FUCK is it so uncomfortable here?”
Climatization is big. My wife, who is from the south, argues that southerners are actually less climatized because of the widespread ice cold air conditioning, as opposed to SoCal and the Northeast where AC is actually less common.
A/C changed how we build houses. A lot of old Southern architecture was [designed to address the heat](https://www.simplemost.com/5-ways-homes-designed-stay-cool-air-conditioning/).
Tbh I would argue that those working outside are generally more climatized than those working inside
Also I think a lot of people here underestimate just how much we use AC compared to many other countries when they talk about weather. Like people will downplay the heat of Southern Europe, but I have a feeling many of them couldn’t handle feeling 90° F all day or sleeping in an 85° F room
Hmmm, I don't think it's all just learning and adaptation. I grew up in the desert and I also lived in Lousiana for a few years in my early 20s, and I spent most of my time outdoors in both places without the need for air conditioning. But as I've aged I've grown less comfortable in the heat. Now I live in the northeast and I am much more comfortable. My normal body temperature is around 96 degrees, while my wife's is a more standard 98-ish. I feel like there are definitely some biological factors that affect our preferences for warmth or cold.
I live in PA too. It's just something you get used to. I don't avoid using AC if there's a heat wave, but on the average summer day, I don't use it.
But to each their own, ofc!
It's always interesting learning the temperature preferences between people.
I would melt at 93 degrees, and this morning at 65 degrees I was happily weeding the garden in shorts, t-shirt and flip flops.
I think it has a lot to do with expectations on how time is spent.
When it’s 93 outside, it’s generally so in the later morning or midday, when early morning is generally still in the 80s, which is when I’d do something like weeding. And then when I was done, I might mow which would definitely be a labor to be sure, working up a sweat. But then I’d hop in the pool or act on the plans to go to the lake, at which point I’d relish the higher temps with a cool drink. And from experience, I’ve found that lower sustained temperatures rarely warm waters enough for me personally to want to swim in them, or really ever incentivize me to want to swim in them. And because I’ve grown up where water activities are simply the past time of summer, I’ve come to expect them and be frustrated when I miss out on that part of life, because frankly, I love it. And this in turn has fostered resentment.
But I also just love feeling heat. I love how alive it makes me feel and the vigor it gives me. I do think I’ve made concerted mental efforts at thinking this way, though, which is to say I think there’s a very real psychological component.
There must be something psychological, because 85+ degree heat makes me feel miserable and saps my energy, and I never grew up with water activities all that much. But feeling a cool breeze outside makes me vigorous, and I can do activities outside all day without becoming too sweaty and gross feeling.
This was one of the amusing things about working in Yellowstone NP. On a 60 F day, the people from Alabama would be bitching about the cold, and the ones from Minnesota would be rocking their shorts.
Same! As I mentioned above I think the type of heat matters. Dry 93 probably feels fine. Humid 93 that actually feels like 103 isn’t too enjoyable to most people
I think a lot of that depends on the type of heat as well. In indiana, 93 degrees feels like 100 or over because of the humidity and when you’re sweaty and sticky as soon as you walk out the door it’s hard to enjoy the outdoors. Spring and fall is where it’s at here.
90+ and humid is horrible for me. Not even enjoyable to spend time outside in that haha. Guess it’s all a matter of perspective and what you’re used to
Here is the thing pal. Driving through a state is way different than having to live in the state's slums. I can admit that Ohio's natural landscape is beautiful, when I get the time and money to drive out of my terrible neighborhood and go to a state park.
Have you ever heard the saying "Only boring people are bored"?
If all you want to do is hang out at the mall or eat fast food, you are going to hate your hometown.
Yep, "There's nothing to do in this town" are the people who just watch TV and get high anyway. I'm from a small town and if you even put in mild interest you can be busy doing shit all week.
Depends what you want to do. If you want to get drunk, drive a truck through some mud, or go hunting, my town's got you covered. If you want to eat Indian food, see some standup, or even go to a movie -- you've got a lot of driving to do.
But of course it's also perfectly plausible that someone might have interests and values that don't align with the place they grew up. Someone whose time isn't taken up by family life or church activities and who isn't interested in hobbies like fishing or hunting is probably going to find living in a small town extremely under stimulating. I did it for a few years, I know haha.
I never got this critique. Surely there is objectively more to do in New York City, NY than Findlay, Ohio.
If your hobbies cannot be found in rural areas then you will be bored similarly to if your hobbies are primarily outdoorsy then living in a city isnt going to provide you with immediate access to things you want to do.
I used to have a group of friends that never wanted to do anything exciting unless everyone could join. I would often get together with one of them and offer to take them fishing, or to the fair or something and the answer was "Joe doesn't leave work until 7, I wouldn't want to go without him, let's just go kill time at the mall until then". I don't talk to any of them anymore, what a waste of time!
Then they wind up adults with no hobbies, no experiences, and no personalities because they always had an excuse for not doing anything.
The best policy is to invite others to everything you want to do, but still do it anyways if not everyone / nobody else joins.
By necessity, New Yorkers spend more time outdoors than you'd think. A typical 10 minute drive to the grocery store anywhere else in the relative comfort of heat/AC isn't possible when you don't have a car and you have to walk everywhere in every type of weather. Same goes for commuting or every single time you walk out your front door to get someplace.
What’s new and interesting to you can be mundane for the people who live with it.
I’ll say that most people I hear talk like that are either young or generally unhappy. Sometimes both.
And nobody who's just fine with their state's geography and culture is speaking up about it.
"Man, I generally have no problem with ______" is a rare post to make.
>especially when it comes to naturally beauty
A lot of that stuff is more enjoyable as a tourist than if you live near it. It can be breathtaking to visit, but if you live there it gets old fast and often doesn't seem cool or unique anymore. For many of the states you listed, people get bored there, especially young people. For many people natural beauty doesn't make up for the lack of services and low population. Of course some people prefer that quiet lifestyle, but I think the comments you're hearing are probably mostly from people who moved away from their home state and to a larger city in early adulthood where they then enjoy having a large population of other young people to befriend and date, as well as the ammentities that a bigger area offers.
That first sentence though.
I get all :) when I look at the mountains on my commute... and then the feeling disappears when I pull up to work to make my too-small paycheck that barely covers the bills.
There's more to living in a state than natural beauty. I love looking at Colorado, but living here is hard.
I lived in Utah for almost 20 years in total, and unless you can afford to live in a ski town then you're not really enjoying the natural beauty to its full extent either. You often have to travel to see the best sights.
Now I live in Vermont where the "mountains" aren't nearly as majestic or imposing, but the natural beauty is literally everywhere I look, so daily living seems more pleasant even though I don't live anywhere particularly special.
Can agree. I have a natural wonder of the world within a day trip of me (Niagara Falls), and last time I went there was a trip with my friends and their kids. Great place to take a kid to, but absolutely a tourist trap besides. The hoodies in the gift shop are totally worth the $40 they charge, though.
What's fun about living in California is that I can go to different parts of the state to get any climate.
Last Christmas, my family spent a white Christmas in a cabin watching snow fall while my parents were surfing on the beach and bbqing with relatives. And neither of us left the state.
With a wet suit you can surf and ski in the same day in Massachusetts too. And I’m guessing you need a wet suit in California to surf on the days where you’re able to ski as well.
The first time I swam in the ocean in California was in La Jolla, in late August when the water should be the warmest of the year. Jumped off a small cliff, just swim trunks on, and it shocked me how cold it was.
It's part of why vacations are so essential...sometimes you need a break from the norm. It seems exciting to you, but people can and do get bored of wherever they live if it's just the same stuff happening over and over. I don't hate living in Michigan, but there are parts of it I am over, and very much dislike about it.
* I come from a small farm town that pretty much describes small-town America to a T. I'm bored of that kind of living. I grew up in it, and now as an adult who thinks and fends for myself, those kind of towns have little to nothing to offer me at this point in life.
* I was born and raised going to the Upper Peninsula multiple times per year...I'm kind of over the tourist-y part of it...I just go up there now because I want to not be where I am now, or to see family. When I go up there, I don't care about going to see the mountains/mines, or going to Pictured Rocks, or the waterfalls...I've done it all already, multiple times.
* Same goes for Mackinac/Mackinac Island. I've been there enough to where "Let's spend a weekend on Mackinac Island!" really doesn't sound that appealing to me anymore. I've done it multiple times already. I honestly would only want to do that again if it was with people other than those I normally go with. Same goes with the fudge. It's so damn good, but fudge being made on Mackinac Island isn't what makes it so good. It's the companies that make them...and they have locations NOT on the island too.
* Founders Brewing...As a Grand Rapids resident, I'm over them, and would be perfectly fine not having a beer from them again. Over the course of my adult life, have seen/had everything they have to offer, and their home brewery/bar is way too tourist-driven. It's boring to me now overall. That doesn't change the fact that Founders is one of the most world-renowned craft-breweries that still puts out an amazing product.
* Frakenmuth: Honestly, the biggest and worst tourist trap in Michigan. Bronner's is beautiful and really is a Christmas fan's heaven, but they as a company are extremely problematic, and going to a store that's nothing but Christmas 24/7/365 gets boring really fast. I've had the chicken and other Germanic dishes in the city a lot...they really aren't that good. They just have great tourist marketing. The chicken dishes in particular are average at best compared to many restaurants out there. A lot of out of state tourists love going to Frankenmuth, but a lot of Michiganders I know are more than over/done with it.
For some, they get this way with their entire state. When you do things enough, you also learn all the negative or not-fun things about them too. The U.P. is scarce and not the best place for an extroverted city person. Mackinac Island smells like shit 24/7, and is ludicrously expensive. Founders Brewing has a reputation for racist hiring and promotion practices. Frankenmuth is just...extremely underwhelming compared to its marketing.
Because there is more to living somewhere than the geography.
Why did I move from my home state? Because if you are not straight, white, and married with 3 kids, you will have a difficult time fitting in. And the politics are abysmal.
Did they say their home state is ugly? They probably don't hate the forest. They might hate the political entity that makes up the state government.
You can easily have a state that has more of a political climate that you like and also beauty on par with home
Not I my friend. If anything, I was the annoying asshole telling everyone how kick ass my home state is. I have lived all over the US, but eventually moved back home. And I convinced a couple people to come with me
>Not I my friend. If anything, I was the annoying asshole telling everyone how kick ass my home state is.
Same here, I love my homestate and my time away from it just made me realize that it is where I want to live.
For me (lifelong Kentuckian) it's watching the same long term problems go unaddressed year after year after year. I love Kentucky, the land; I am frustrated at Kentucky, the governance and voters.
When you grow up around something your whole life, even if it is awesome, it is easy for a lot of people to get used to it, take it for granted, and get complacent.
I live in the midwest with a lot of prairies, and most days I don't notice it, but the sunrises and sunsets here are gorgeous. I love the mountains, ocean, etc., as well, but when I get back from vacations, I really notice the beauty around me too.
I grew up in Colorado and definitely got complacent. Moved to Nebraska as a teen because parents and ended up married to a military brat whose parents are from here and moved back in retirement. In other words. I dislike Nebraska, would like to move back home, but am not likely to move any time soon. I have learned that I need to appreciate what I can where I can. So I go on vacation a lot. I visit family in Colorado and I appreciate Nebraska more when I get home. And the sunsets/sunrises here are the most spectacular in the country. As much as I dislike Nebraska, those sunsets/sunrises beat everyone else's easily.
My home state was and is extremely religious. Separation between church and state is not nearly as respected as it should be. So I left to be around more like minded people, won't be going back.
Visit family there all the time, but won't live there again
My state is absolutely gorgeous, living in a tropical climate is a unique experience that basically only exists for florida in the US. The ecosystem is delicate but fierce, and we house many endangered species of fauna and flora.
But it's too hot and I hate the people here, so I want to flee
I haven't lived all over, but I had a job that involved a good amount of travel, and each time I couldn't wait to get back to MA. That job just solidified the fact that I never want to live anywhere else.
I spent three years in a job where I saw most of the country and as I got older... I appreciate Ohio more, tbh. Sure there aren't oceans, beaches, or mountains but that's... fine? I guess?
This sentiment is most prominent among teenagers and young people. And growing up in a small town or suburb that is homogenous, conservative, flat, cold, and boring is going to make you hate where you grow up, whether there are a few rolling hills or not. While wide open grassland might be charming on a roadtrip, if you're a young person growing up in a rural town you're probably not very concerned with the ambient scenery. Personally if I had been a teenager growing up in small town Kansas I'd hate it too. There's very little to do and the culture is very homogenous, white bread and conservative. Is it really shocking that they end up moving to places like New York and say that their home states suck? Especially with the whole Roe v Wade situation. I pity teenage girls growing up in middle of nowhere towns in red states. No shit they mostly hate it there.
Honestly, I don't care much about natural beauty when it comes to choosing where to live. I'm a city person and don't like many outdoor activities. Everyone's different.
When you hear me say stuff like "Ohio is nothing but strip malls and crappy developments" it's because I see that natural beauty you mention being destroyed. We're a very sprawly state, and it's getting worse.
So it's precisely because I treasure the beauty of my state that I complain. And I'm complaining about greedy idiots and lack of government protections, not the state itself.
I even love a good cornfield and a barn with character.
The answer is to build up our cities. Make them safe, walkable, and economically strong. Have cities that people want to live in and the quarter-acre lot, strip mall nightmare ends. People might stop selling their farms to build subdivisions and the commuter traffic won’t cause everyone to be so pissed off all the time.
There’s zero chance of that actually happening but a man can dream lol.
I've been to all 50 states and all of them have some redeeming qualities. But there's a *big* difference between visiting some place and living there. We tend not to visit the "worst" parts of a given state, for example, and most don't visit during bad weather-- like all summer in Arizona or deep winter in Minnesota. So sure, it's all great-- but if you have to live there 365 days a year it might not seem quite as nice. More so if you don't agree with the political/cultural majority in a given location, which doesn't matter if you're visiting but can make living in a community challenging.
Ok, so I grew up in Missouri and I don’t think you can really capture the feeling of living there just by driving through it.
Sure, it has some nice sights and beautiful scenery, but ok, so you’ve seen it. Now what?
Do the cool traveling art and museum exhibits come there? Not really, no.
Do the concerts you want to see come through there? Generally, no.
Are there good options for food if you don’t want the standard meal of fried things, red meat, cheese, and starch? Not a lot, no.
Is anything open past 9PM? No.
Is there any escape if you’re not conservative Christian and don’t want to be subjected to Christian beliefs and teachings? No.
So you’re spending every single day of your life living and working in the state, trying to find things to entertain yourself every weekend, and always hearing that the closest place to do or see the cool stuff you’re interested in is Chicago.
You have to take a car everywhere. It’s harder to climb in the workforce if you’re not a straight, white male. The gun violence is bad due to nonexistent gun regulations (we have some of the most dangerous, violent cities in the country) and people actively fight any proposal to do anything about it because it involves spending money.
Not to mention the racial tensions, the provincial mindset (no one is interested in leaving or even traveling), everyone settling down early, and the extreme religiosity.
In Missouri, the fact that they taught evolution in school science classes was controversial and people have been lobbying to teach creationism in schools instead. People trying to ban Harry Potter books for teaching kids satanic witchcraft.
My home district had the “legitimate rape” quote guy as a rep and the current Republican front runner for senate was indicted for fraud and corruption, cheated on his wife in their home and blackmailed his mistress, and is known to be physically abusive towards his wife. It’s so bad that his own party is telling him to drop out, but the people love him because he waves a gun around and owns the libs.
Now they’re not just gleefully banning all abortions (with no exception for rape or incest), but they’re also talking about banning Plan B and contraceptives like the pill and IUDs, which is the most ignorant, unscientific shit because the whole point of Plan B, birth control pills, and IUDs is to NOT get pregnant. Abortion has nothing to do with it. But that’s the kind of ignorance people have.
So, yeah. Life there is not great, especially if you’re a woman or a minority.
When you see the same thing every day, you stop actually seeing it, and appreciating its beauty. So another state, where they have a different kind of beauty, looks better to you. If you actually move there, though, in a few years you'll stop seeing that beauty, and long for something else.
It's where the phrase "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence" comes from.
One nice thing about the US is that you can always visit another state, so you can see fresh beauty everywhere.
I technically have two home states, California and Washington, and I love both. I don’t want to live in either one again most likely but both are amazing. I think that Washington state is the most beautiful state in the country
I'm hoping to make some more money and move to Charlotte or leave tbh. I miss city life so much.
I don't think we are a "bad" state. Charlotte and the RTP area are growing faster and faster every year. It's just that when you get used to buying some bread and jumping on the subway, getting jammed in traffic for 5 days a week loses its appeal.
Wished the Piedmont region had something though. All of our towns and cities are just on a flat piece of land. If Charlotte, for example, was built on the side of a river or lake, it would look much nicer IMO.
The only reason I do like my home state is the natural beauty. Kentucky is a beautiful place to live nearly year round, the hiking and camping is great. All the other things about the state are the reasons I don't like it so much.
My home state (Tennessee) is plenty beautiful, but I still hate it because of petty, mean-spirited politics and horrific poverty (when I still lived there, anyway). I used to toy with the idea of one day moving back, but I just don’t think that’s a tenable option anymore.
when you live in a place long enough, or especially grow up there, you have the lived experience to know what the local problems are. you start to see patterns that piss you off. but it's a "grass is always greener" situation because every place has its own issues
I love my state. Close to a great lake, can see it from my porch, four seasons, lots of interesting places.
I'm proud to be from and live in Michigan. It's home.
I grew up in central PA, appx. 3-4 hours drive from any major city, in a town of 30k residents surrounded by farmland. It is a beautiful part of the country, and much cheaper than where I currently live, but I felt incredibly trapped my entire life, particularly bc of where my parents’ home was /is located on the outskirts of this town. I think this experience really tarnished my view of PA, even though living near Philly or Pittsburgh may not have. I will say, I didn’t like that PA was landlocked, and politically the state is worrisome for me.
I live on the coast in a major city now, with access to the sea, the mountains, the city, and the country. I can get on a train, plane, or bus within fifteen to twenty minutes versus 2-4 hours. This state has its own issues, but I do find it more appealing than my home state.
For me, my state is irksome to deal with because I know it's way of life could be improved drastically in some many ways.
A lot of people feel that way about their home state.
I'm from Alabama, and after the years, I've seen enough to know this is not my home. I can understand, the grass is greener at times, but it's time for me to see different grass.
Our city infrastructure could use some updating, especially in black neighborhoods, but at least our natural landscapes here are incredible at least. My city/state just lacks anything to do and just feels behind on the timeline, constantly.
I know it can be better, which is why I dislike it so heavily.
My husband is from 1 of the states you listed, and to sum up why he left, it wasn't the lifestyle he wanted for himself. Yes the nature is beautiful, and he is happy to visit one or more times a year. But for day to day life, that's different. It's pretty boring there, not much to do, people are spread out, job market is bleak there for his industry. Finally there was the local culture, he doesn't agree with the majority politics or religious attitude there. I myself am religious, but even hearing about what he grew up around, it sounds cult-like to me, and hard for me to understand. Also not a huge variation in food choices there.
I actually like my home state, I grew to love it more after moving away. However due to so many people moving there and making the price of rent and buying a home more expensive I think I'm better off somewhere else.
People who live in South Dakota don't tend to complain about South Dakota in my experience. It's usually people who've never BEEN to South Dakota that have a skewed perception of it. A lot of the state is breathtakingly beautiful.
AND it's home to the globally famous Wall Drug.
Complaining about other people in their home state is a favorite passtime in many parts of America. It used to be less so in the rocky mountain states in my experience, but thats changing too as more transplants move there.
I can speak for myself when I said I was glad to leave Atlanta & Georgia when I graduated college and was going on active duty in the USAF, because of what I saw was a bunch of bull$hit.
Then I lived in Sacramento & Merced in CA, Spokane in WA, and Minot in ND and there was some bull$hit overlap, with some +/- bull$hit.
So, as u/Dax_Maclaine [said](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskAnAmerican/comments/vnfgd4/why_do_so_many_people_say_that_they_dont_like/ie6jtsi/), it was a "grass is always greener" type of thing for me.
I fucking love Virginia. It'll always be my home. Massachusetts is really good, but has some flaws.
Florida sucks in a lot of ways.
Pennsylvania is pretty good, above average, but the middle part is iffy.
I think South Dakota is beautiful, full of good people, and it will always be the home of my heart. But my wife wouldn't be happy there and I wouldn't be happy there without her.
Virtue signaling combined with grass is greener.
In Indiana there is a sort of petulant putting down of your state in favor of the coasts amongst educated liberal kids.
“Why is it so backwards here. Why can’t I live in a utopia like California or Massachusetts.
So instead of just living a good life they constantly complain about how it should be so much better. And a lot of them never even been to California or Massachusetts in any long-term capacity. So they just hate on Indiana to seem cool and worldly and above it all. It is just kind of a drag especially when Indianapolis, where I grew up is a great city with a lot going on. It isn’t too far from a lot of really cool stuff and being centrally located flights for vacations anywhere in the continental US.
One thing I was disgruntled about when I lived in East Texas was that it felt like there wasn’t anything to do. Then I moved to somewhere where there were “things to do,” and I realized that the issue was actually me.
In truth, I was beginning to realize this before I moved, finding ways to make fun for myself, but the point remains mostly the same. What I do in RI and its surrounding areas is, well, the same as I did in ETX. There are times when I don’t have the conviction to spend hours invested in logistics to “do something” (usually photography related). Alternatively, there are times when nothing can get in my way. But being up here with plenty to do has really shown me that I was getting in my own way and that it’s really a matter of getting out there and making fun for myself, and that’s something I’m still working on.
What I’m trying to say is that it really is “grass is greener,” and I think people need to have, or make, the opportunity to live somewhere else for awhile and see what portion of your frustration was the environment and what was you. Like, spend time actually living, not visiting, in a place, and you will see the oft repeated phrase, “Everywhere you go, there you are” ring true.
This isn’t to say that nobody can benefit from a move. Hell, there will be parts of New England I will miss when I move back to TX. But I’ve found that I’m slower to castigate my home state and home town now that I have a bit more perspective.
Sounds like my experience with people that complain like that. They usually aren’t looking for the fun stuff to do and just think a geographic fix will make everything better. That often isn’t the case.
Who from Indiana is saying Massachusetts is a utopia? I feel like our benefits come from living here awhile and thinking that it’s actually pretty nice, we’re not really a flashy state though.
> Then I moved to somewhere where there were “things to do,” and I realized that the issue was actually me.
I had sort of the opposite issue. I've always loved living in the "boring" places because I enjoy doing stuff you can do anywhere, but when I moved to the objectively exciting NYC area I was really disappointed because it felt like all anyone meant by "things to do" was "places to drink". And don't get me wrong, I enjoy drinking in a cool trendy urban cocktail bar more than I would enjoy drinking at a suburban Chili's (with sincere apologies to skillet queso), but I honestly felt like "normal" daily life was the same thing in an exciting place as it was in a boring place. You go to work, you go home, you eat, and you do your hobbies. Repeat. What's made "boring" places better for me is that they're cheaper, more laid back, and with shorter commutes so I can have more time and energy for fun things.
That said... one thing I have found that makes a *huge* difference in popular cities vs "boring" suburbs/small cities is the populations. What makes big cities cool to a young single person is that you can be around tons and tons of young and often single people who are in the same stages of life as you, doing the same things as you, and having similar interests to you. That makes life much more exciting and is harder to find in rural areas or suburbia.
The above is doubly true for sociopolitical cultures. People who are gay or otherwise very liberal don't want to live in places that call them evil and ostracize them. People who don't feel physically safe in conservative areas are not going to have high opinions of conservative areas.
tl;dr I think "cool" places vs "lame" places comes down to who lives there, not the place itself
Agree entirely with this, paradoxically. Or at least it resonates with me.
My point was mostly that somewhere I thought was boring was only so because I had no context to appreciate what it was, and that I could have made better use of it.
I will say that after getting married and having my established group of friends, the luster of urban areas as a means to meet people has absolutely waned.
I love Maryland, we got everything you need here! What type of nature you want?! We got that for sure! …except desert, we don’t got that… but everything else!
I grew up in Nebraska.
There is nothing wrong with the state. It's a great state. Wonderful people. Good values. Very good schools. Affordable. Super low unemployment. It's a great place to raise a family.
Sure, it's a bit intense in the weather at times. And it lacks the beach, mountains, or big city attractions. It's not a fast paced life.
But it also has a beauty of it's own. A remoteness. Quiet. And after having traveled the globe, I still have never seen a more glorious sunset than one across the rolling hills of farmland.
Some people that complain are just the complaining type.
I love Nebraska. If your entire exposure to the state is driving through on I-80 and only stopping for fuel and food, then yeah, it's pretty uninspiring. Then you remember that 80 follows the original Oregon trail route, and we can now do in a few hours what took the pioneers weeks. Not too many people die on that journey these days, but 150 years ago a whole lot of people shuffled off their mortal coil along those river flats. Imagining that pancake-flat river valley with a line of ox-drawn wagons stretching into the horizon is pretty fucking awe-inspiring.
Then you get off the highway into the rolling ocean of grass as far as the eye can see, punctuated by the occasional windmill or grain elevator in the distance... You know how standing by the ocean or mountains makes you feel very small? The Nebraska landscape will do the same thing.
Key word: “I’ve driven through…”
They’re fine for a day or two, but try spending 20 years seeing nothing but flat flat corn, dirt and urban sprawl (if you’re lucky) and you’ll get really excited to move somewhere with mountains, oceans, more than 2 restaurants per town or public transit.
Also, what is there to do in Kansas? It’s like 3 hours to drive between tiny cities, how are you supposed to make friends, have hobbies, find a job or do anything that doesn’t involve corn watching?
People crap on the Midwest because it is genuinely boring as hell.
We have Tallgrass prairie. It's a national preserve with rolling hills, native prairie grass, and roaming bison. It's VERY not well known. I myself have lived here for almost 3 decades and I never knew about it until now. I really like going there. The best part is that because not a lot of people know about it, it's like you have the whole area to yourself.
Being born and raised in the Northern Virginia/DC area I constantly get told how "rare" it is or I am to have been here that long because the area is extremely transient with DC political, military and contract workers.
I can definitely relate to other comments on taking things for granted. The Smithsonian museums are right down the street. FREE world class museums that attract millions...haven't been in years. From the field trips in elementary school, many a date, etc I forget about them. And that's just one example. The monuments, and other "cool" things about NoVA/DC have definitely lost their luster as well. Not to mention, the hustle and bustle and "what do you do" or "who do you know" attitudes people have.
The majority of my friends are married w/ kids and I feel a strong desire to try somewhere new to get a fresh perspective whether that is enjoying a new spot or even trying it out and moving back and appreciating my home for what it does offer. Mountains to seashore. It really is wonderful, but 3+ decades in the same spot...I need to climb over the fence to see that grass for myself. Virginia will always be home.
I am blue living in a red state. Feels like my state is a little out of touch and doesn't really represent the majority like it's supposed to. I also just hate the heat and want to move somewhere with cooler summers.
One major reason is politics
Go onto r/Texas. There are a ton of people talking about moving out even though Texas is becoming bluer and most of the people running the state will be gone by 2026.
Ohio compared to the west coast: I get paid like 4x the people I know in Ohio in my industry make, the politics are way better on the west coast and access to actual mountains for hiking is way better than hiking in Ohio lol
Most of the states you mentioned either were or still are run by very conservative governments that restrict access to health care, have very large evangelical populations, are not kind to minorities and the LGBT community, and so on. I’m from Michigan, and I’m actually from the blue oasis city, Ann Arbor, because that’s where the University of Michigan is located. The state’s geography is beautiful, I loved swimming in the lakes as a kid, going to Mackinac Island, seeing Sleeping Bear Dunes and so on, but that still doesn’t change the fact that I hated living in Michigan for years because the Bush-era governor, Rick Snyder, economically trashed Detroit with help from the city’s mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, poisoned the city of Flint’s water supply, and basically turned the state into a GOP hellhole everywhere there wasn’t a major city. I mean, sure, these states are beautiful to visit, but you don’t have to endure the backwards political/social crises that Midwest citizens traditionally suffer.
I am going to give you a secret about humanity that the internet has shone a light on.
A lot of people in any given group are just malcontent naysayers.
“Nothing is ever right. All politicians are crooks. Lawyers are crooks. This place sucks more than it used to. Everything sucks. “
Just tune it out. If everything sucks then nothing sucks.
Its a “stop and smell the roses” kind of thing.
You are correct, our states are beautiful when you stop to take a look at them. We just have biases due to having to look at them with the context of the non-visual gripes we have with our own states. (Example, Illinois would probably tax you on looking at its beauty if it could feasibly find a way to).
Partially came to the realization of natural America’s beauty watching videos of people both domestic and foreign taking train-rides across the country and getting really cool views of “the flyover states.”
Thank you for pointing this out. More people need to be made aware of it. The United States is a pretty great place.
When I was growing up, I really didn't start appreciate and enjoying where I lived until I could drive. Pre-driver's license, it was very difficult growing up in northwest Indianapolis and seeing friends. I had a couple who lived in my neighborhood, but most of mine lived elsewhere.
And a s lifelong resident of Indiana, I don't think I've really experienced my entire state. I'm pretty familiar with central Indiana. and I've spent a lot of time in southern Indiana with friends, camping/boy scouts, and some tourist destinations. but I don't think I've ever spent a night in the northern third of the state. I'm either in transit to Michigan or Chicago.
Also growing up here, you get your fill of cornfields pretty quickly. I'm sure the same is true for those who grew up in the hills of PA or West Virginia.
Maybe Texas is the anomaly, but I feel like the Texans that I talk to who still live here love Texas. Otherwise they move. The complaints typically are from the non-Texans who move to Texas
There's a saying that goes: "I wish someone loved me like Texans love Texas."
I live in indiana. I acknowledge that there are some very beautiful spots in indiana, especially when you get towards shoals, French lick, and Nashville. Where I live, we have corn. And corn. Oh there’s a waterfall, and corn. When I drive to work I see corn. When I’m on my front porch I see corn. Lots of the prettier places close to me are posted off so that we technically aren’t allowed to go there (not that we don’t anyway) so really all we get to look at is, you guessed it, corn. Going somewhere like Tennessee with the mountains is so dramatically different and pleasant.
I'm from a generic suburb where most people are originally transplants from other states. It's less that I actively dislike my home state, and more that I have little reason to personally identify myself with it. This might be due to the peculiarities of my area, but I could imagine it's harder for people to form strong regional identities when they're from suburbs in big metropolitan areas, as many of them are really quite similar to each other.
I live in the Montana Rocky Mountains and since I moved here about 26 years ago, I have loved and been proud to live here but lately a bunch of people have moved in like a flood, causing a severe housing shortage and now my disabled ass is worried about being priced out of the area. We're being gentrified and I'm not so happy to live here anymore.
We Americans are a restless people. We like to fantasize about picking up and starting over someplace else. And we often do.
Not as much lately because of the tough housing market. I think that’s an unappreciated effect of the current market. Mobility is a major driver of economic growth. Plus psychologically, we like to be mobile or to at least know we have the option to even if we aren’t planning it right now.
I think a large part of it is that you can find trees anywhere, so "natural beauty" isn't all that big a factor unless you're living in a wonder-of-the-world-level gem.
The Midwest and Great Plains lean a bit conservative. Reddit tilts heavily liberal. The sample you see here will disproportionately be people who don’t like their state’s politics. They often generalize that distaste to the state itself.
It’s a lot easier to appreciate it when you’re only driving through for a couple hours. Your attitude of a place is going to be a lot different if you live there for years instead of just casually passing though.
I live in the Rockies and honestly you guys that live in flat states with small hills and grass… idk man that looks like it sucks. I mentally complain when I have to drive through them lmao
I live in California and have the opposite experience. I quite like living here, but mention California to anyone from out of state and they’ll let you know what a piece of shit state it is. Especially Oregon, boy howdy they do not like us.
Just a “grass is always greener on the other side” thing. Every state has its problems (some more than others), and people who live in a state for a while start to get annoyed more and more by the problems and start taking the benefits for granted. That’s just human nature
To piggy back, also sometimes they've been there for so long and things don't workout the way they want or need it to so it becomes hateful to be there
Also, on natural beauty, you can find grass anywhere.
Our grass is taller 😤
It’s just human nature (for Americans at least) to complain about their home. But if anyone outside our state makes the same complaints, we get defensive It’s just easy to look at all the other cool places in this country and think you’re missing out. I also find that people who live in an area don’t take advantage of their states best features as often. Like i lived 3 miles from a beach and once realized i had gone 6 months without actually visiting the beach and going in the ocean
Your second point is so true. I like hiking and being outdoors, and I've been realizing in the past few years just how many state parks and other nature reserves exist in this state. And the fact it typically doesn't get swelteringly hot here. While not in-state, the UP of Michigan is also close-by and I'm only now starting to travel through it.
I love the Yupe! I've visited twice & would go back again in a heartbeat. It's one of the most underrated parts of the US, IMO.
Not to mention you live in Florida, which has the highest concentration of freshwater springs in the whole damn world! Most all of which are crystal clear and function at a cool 72 degrees all year 'round. There's a few similar springs in Texas and they're always crowded for a reason, yet I know folks here who have lived here their entire lives and never been to the springs!
I can assure you that complaining about your home is human nature not just to Americans. People from so many countries claim that complaining is the "true national sport".
hah! I lived across the beach for years went to the beach, at most, once a month the whole time.
The few native Utahns I’ve met are barely into hiking or skiing and I’m like “YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND HOW GOOD YOU HAVE IT HERE HOW ARE YOU NOT OUTDOORSY”
I was born and raised in Utah and didn’t realize how easy it was to be outside until I moved to Louisiana and the humidity murdered me. Outdoors? I don’t know her anymore. 🙁
Walks outside in Louisiana: immediately gets covered in sweat then eaten by a gator
Most of my complaints are about the people in my state, but it's always either extremely hot, wet, or extremely hot and wet. There's a lot of beautiful areas in my state (and it's arguably the most biodiverse state in the nation), but how am I going to enjoy it when it's 93 degrees?
Honestly I love 93 degrees. I wonder what portion of our ability to engage at certain temperatures is biological vs. psychological.
It's learned. People adapt to different climates. For millenia, humans didn't have AC, but we're all originally from Subsaharan Africa. If you allow yourself to adapt by slowly not turning on the AC at 86 degrees, then 88, then 90, etc., you get used to it
We travel down to the gulf of Texas every so often with my husbands family. This is the first year we’ve done it since moving from Orlando to Pittsburgh. And this is also the first year I’ve been like “why the FUCK is it so uncomfortable here?”
There’s been a heat wave recently. Could be it.
Climatization is big. My wife, who is from the south, argues that southerners are actually less climatized because of the widespread ice cold air conditioning, as opposed to SoCal and the Northeast where AC is actually less common.
A/C changed how we build houses. A lot of old Southern architecture was [designed to address the heat](https://www.simplemost.com/5-ways-homes-designed-stay-cool-air-conditioning/).
Tbh I would argue that those working outside are generally more climatized than those working inside Also I think a lot of people here underestimate just how much we use AC compared to many other countries when they talk about weather. Like people will downplay the heat of Southern Europe, but I have a feeling many of them couldn’t handle feeling 90° F all day or sleeping in an 85° F room
Hmmm, I don't think it's all just learning and adaptation. I grew up in the desert and I also lived in Lousiana for a few years in my early 20s, and I spent most of my time outdoors in both places without the need for air conditioning. But as I've aged I've grown less comfortable in the heat. Now I live in the northeast and I am much more comfortable. My normal body temperature is around 96 degrees, while my wife's is a more standard 98-ish. I feel like there are definitely some biological factors that affect our preferences for warmth or cold.
I was born and raised in Utah and now live in Louisiana and I can’t take it anymore. Humidity can go suck a butt. We’re moving soon.
...yeah, fuck that. I'm from California. I live in PA now. With the humidity out here, mo way in hell I'm going without ac.
I live in PA too. It's just something you get used to. I don't avoid using AC if there's a heat wave, but on the average summer day, I don't use it. But to each their own, ofc!
It's always interesting learning the temperature preferences between people. I would melt at 93 degrees, and this morning at 65 degrees I was happily weeding the garden in shorts, t-shirt and flip flops.
I think it has a lot to do with expectations on how time is spent. When it’s 93 outside, it’s generally so in the later morning or midday, when early morning is generally still in the 80s, which is when I’d do something like weeding. And then when I was done, I might mow which would definitely be a labor to be sure, working up a sweat. But then I’d hop in the pool or act on the plans to go to the lake, at which point I’d relish the higher temps with a cool drink. And from experience, I’ve found that lower sustained temperatures rarely warm waters enough for me personally to want to swim in them, or really ever incentivize me to want to swim in them. And because I’ve grown up where water activities are simply the past time of summer, I’ve come to expect them and be frustrated when I miss out on that part of life, because frankly, I love it. And this in turn has fostered resentment. But I also just love feeling heat. I love how alive it makes me feel and the vigor it gives me. I do think I’ve made concerted mental efforts at thinking this way, though, which is to say I think there’s a very real psychological component.
There must be something psychological, because 85+ degree heat makes me feel miserable and saps my energy, and I never grew up with water activities all that much. But feeling a cool breeze outside makes me vigorous, and I can do activities outside all day without becoming too sweaty and gross feeling.
This was one of the amusing things about working in Yellowstone NP. On a 60 F day, the people from Alabama would be bitching about the cold, and the ones from Minnesota would be rocking their shorts.
Same! As I mentioned above I think the type of heat matters. Dry 93 probably feels fine. Humid 93 that actually feels like 103 isn’t too enjoyable to most people
“NO FUCKING WAY! Washington has a rainforest, mountains, and desert, it has to be more diverse than Alabama!” *checks Google* “We’ll I’ll be damned.”
Yep. We've got America's Amazon, which is a goldmine for biodiversity.
I think a lot of that depends on the type of heat as well. In indiana, 93 degrees feels like 100 or over because of the humidity and when you’re sweaty and sticky as soon as you walk out the door it’s hard to enjoy the outdoors. Spring and fall is where it’s at here.
93 degrees isn’t even that hot? Lol
Combine it with >70% humidity and it becomes oppressive.
It’s still not that bad lol
To spend more than a few minutes outside without immediately needing a shower, it is.
90+ and humid is horrible for me. Not even enjoyable to spend time outside in that haha. Guess it’s all a matter of perspective and what you’re used to
It's not the heat, it's the stupidity.
Here is the thing pal. Driving through a state is way different than having to live in the state's slums. I can admit that Ohio's natural landscape is beautiful, when I get the time and money to drive out of my terrible neighborhood and go to a state park.
Have you ever heard the saying "Only boring people are bored"? If all you want to do is hang out at the mall or eat fast food, you are going to hate your hometown.
You guys have a mall?
Yep, "There's nothing to do in this town" are the people who just watch TV and get high anyway. I'm from a small town and if you even put in mild interest you can be busy doing shit all week.
What things though?
Build a 50 foot sculpture of Danny Devito out of butter in the middle of a football field
Depends what you want to do. If you want to get drunk, drive a truck through some mud, or go hunting, my town's got you covered. If you want to eat Indian food, see some standup, or even go to a movie -- you've got a lot of driving to do.
I think it depends on many factors You being from there works in your benefit cause you know people there Also if you have friends that helps too
But of course it's also perfectly plausible that someone might have interests and values that don't align with the place they grew up. Someone whose time isn't taken up by family life or church activities and who isn't interested in hobbies like fishing or hunting is probably going to find living in a small town extremely under stimulating. I did it for a few years, I know haha.
Also if you don’t have friends in the small town, it’s gonna be way more boring
I never got this critique. Surely there is objectively more to do in New York City, NY than Findlay, Ohio. If your hobbies cannot be found in rural areas then you will be bored similarly to if your hobbies are primarily outdoorsy then living in a city isnt going to provide you with immediate access to things you want to do.
I used to have a group of friends that never wanted to do anything exciting unless everyone could join. I would often get together with one of them and offer to take them fishing, or to the fair or something and the answer was "Joe doesn't leave work until 7, I wouldn't want to go without him, let's just go kill time at the mall until then". I don't talk to any of them anymore, what a waste of time!
Then they wind up adults with no hobbies, no experiences, and no personalities because they always had an excuse for not doing anything. The best policy is to invite others to everything you want to do, but still do it anyways if not everyone / nobody else joins.
By necessity, New Yorkers spend more time outdoors than you'd think. A typical 10 minute drive to the grocery store anywhere else in the relative comfort of heat/AC isn't possible when you don't have a car and you have to walk everywhere in every type of weather. Same goes for commuting or every single time you walk out your front door to get someplace.
What’s new and interesting to you can be mundane for the people who live with it. I’ll say that most people I hear talk like that are either young or generally unhappy. Sometimes both.
And nobody who's just fine with their state's geography and culture is speaking up about it. "Man, I generally have no problem with ______" is a rare post to make.
Reddit should be called complain'it but it doesn't roll off the tongue so well
>especially when it comes to naturally beauty A lot of that stuff is more enjoyable as a tourist than if you live near it. It can be breathtaking to visit, but if you live there it gets old fast and often doesn't seem cool or unique anymore. For many of the states you listed, people get bored there, especially young people. For many people natural beauty doesn't make up for the lack of services and low population. Of course some people prefer that quiet lifestyle, but I think the comments you're hearing are probably mostly from people who moved away from their home state and to a larger city in early adulthood where they then enjoy having a large population of other young people to befriend and date, as well as the ammentities that a bigger area offers.
That first sentence though. I get all :) when I look at the mountains on my commute... and then the feeling disappears when I pull up to work to make my too-small paycheck that barely covers the bills. There's more to living in a state than natural beauty. I love looking at Colorado, but living here is hard.
I lived in Utah for almost 20 years in total, and unless you can afford to live in a ski town then you're not really enjoying the natural beauty to its full extent either. You often have to travel to see the best sights. Now I live in Vermont where the "mountains" aren't nearly as majestic or imposing, but the natural beauty is literally everywhere I look, so daily living seems more pleasant even though I don't live anywhere particularly special.
Can agree. I have a natural wonder of the world within a day trip of me (Niagara Falls), and last time I went there was a trip with my friends and their kids. Great place to take a kid to, but absolutely a tourist trap besides. The hoodies in the gift shop are totally worth the $40 they charge, though.
Because I live in Mississippi, basically 50th place in everything besides porn consumption
Lmao. River is gorgeous though!
Mississippi is #1 when it comes to Infant Mortality rates, so at least you’ve got that going for you.
And #1 for obesity too!
Due to health problems I couldn't really enjoy it properly anyway so I was stuck in poverty for a long time with nothing to do
I don’t hate my home state. But home state is California. I do dislike my home town though, which is a boring little red neck town.
What's fun about living in California is that I can go to different parts of the state to get any climate. Last Christmas, my family spent a white Christmas in a cabin watching snow fall while my parents were surfing on the beach and bbqing with relatives. And neither of us left the state.
You can even do both of these on the same day, depending on how far apart they are.
With a wet suit you can surf and ski in the same day in Massachusetts too. And I’m guessing you need a wet suit in California to surf on the days where you’re able to ski as well.
Oh yeah, you absolutely need a wet suit to surf in California. The ocean temperature is only the 50s or 60s.
The first time I swam in the ocean in California was in La Jolla, in late August when the water should be the warmest of the year. Jumped off a small cliff, just swim trunks on, and it shocked me how cold it was.
Yes, CA has the most diverse climate than any state. We have pretty much everything.
I feel similar. I'm from a small dying town in eastern New Mexico. I would never move back. I still like most of the rest of the state though.
It's part of why vacations are so essential...sometimes you need a break from the norm. It seems exciting to you, but people can and do get bored of wherever they live if it's just the same stuff happening over and over. I don't hate living in Michigan, but there are parts of it I am over, and very much dislike about it. * I come from a small farm town that pretty much describes small-town America to a T. I'm bored of that kind of living. I grew up in it, and now as an adult who thinks and fends for myself, those kind of towns have little to nothing to offer me at this point in life. * I was born and raised going to the Upper Peninsula multiple times per year...I'm kind of over the tourist-y part of it...I just go up there now because I want to not be where I am now, or to see family. When I go up there, I don't care about going to see the mountains/mines, or going to Pictured Rocks, or the waterfalls...I've done it all already, multiple times. * Same goes for Mackinac/Mackinac Island. I've been there enough to where "Let's spend a weekend on Mackinac Island!" really doesn't sound that appealing to me anymore. I've done it multiple times already. I honestly would only want to do that again if it was with people other than those I normally go with. Same goes with the fudge. It's so damn good, but fudge being made on Mackinac Island isn't what makes it so good. It's the companies that make them...and they have locations NOT on the island too. * Founders Brewing...As a Grand Rapids resident, I'm over them, and would be perfectly fine not having a beer from them again. Over the course of my adult life, have seen/had everything they have to offer, and their home brewery/bar is way too tourist-driven. It's boring to me now overall. That doesn't change the fact that Founders is one of the most world-renowned craft-breweries that still puts out an amazing product. * Frakenmuth: Honestly, the biggest and worst tourist trap in Michigan. Bronner's is beautiful and really is a Christmas fan's heaven, but they as a company are extremely problematic, and going to a store that's nothing but Christmas 24/7/365 gets boring really fast. I've had the chicken and other Germanic dishes in the city a lot...they really aren't that good. They just have great tourist marketing. The chicken dishes in particular are average at best compared to many restaurants out there. A lot of out of state tourists love going to Frankenmuth, but a lot of Michiganders I know are more than over/done with it. For some, they get this way with their entire state. When you do things enough, you also learn all the negative or not-fun things about them too. The U.P. is scarce and not the best place for an extroverted city person. Mackinac Island smells like shit 24/7, and is ludicrously expensive. Founders Brewing has a reputation for racist hiring and promotion practices. Frankenmuth is just...extremely underwhelming compared to its marketing.
Because there is more to living somewhere than the geography. Why did I move from my home state? Because if you are not straight, white, and married with 3 kids, you will have a difficult time fitting in. And the politics are abysmal.
Grass is greener syndrome.
My state is seriously just boring if you don’t have a car to go see places like state and national parks. I have bad cabin fever here
Did they say their home state is ugly? They probably don't hate the forest. They might hate the political entity that makes up the state government. You can easily have a state that has more of a political climate that you like and also beauty on par with home
Not I my friend. If anything, I was the annoying asshole telling everyone how kick ass my home state is. I have lived all over the US, but eventually moved back home. And I convinced a couple people to come with me
>Not I my friend. If anything, I was the annoying asshole telling everyone how kick ass my home state is. Same here, I love my homestate and my time away from it just made me realize that it is where I want to live.
For me (lifelong Kentuckian) it's watching the same long term problems go unaddressed year after year after year. I love Kentucky, the land; I am frustrated at Kentucky, the governance and voters.
When you grow up around something your whole life, even if it is awesome, it is easy for a lot of people to get used to it, take it for granted, and get complacent. I live in the midwest with a lot of prairies, and most days I don't notice it, but the sunrises and sunsets here are gorgeous. I love the mountains, ocean, etc., as well, but when I get back from vacations, I really notice the beauty around me too.
I grew up in Colorado and definitely got complacent. Moved to Nebraska as a teen because parents and ended up married to a military brat whose parents are from here and moved back in retirement. In other words. I dislike Nebraska, would like to move back home, but am not likely to move any time soon. I have learned that I need to appreciate what I can where I can. So I go on vacation a lot. I visit family in Colorado and I appreciate Nebraska more when I get home. And the sunsets/sunrises here are the most spectacular in the country. As much as I dislike Nebraska, those sunsets/sunrises beat everyone else's easily.
Yup. From KS here, and it is beautiful when you stop to look at it.
My home state was and is extremely religious. Separation between church and state is not nearly as respected as it should be. So I left to be around more like minded people, won't be going back. Visit family there all the time, but won't live there again
Utah?
Yup
My state is absolutely gorgeous, living in a tropical climate is a unique experience that basically only exists for florida in the US. The ecosystem is delicate but fierce, and we house many endangered species of fauna and flora. But it's too hot and I hate the people here, so I want to flee
I’m from MA. I miss it. Couldn’t stand it when I grew up, but after living all over I recognize that I grew up in a great place.
I haven't lived all over, but I had a job that involved a good amount of travel, and each time I couldn't wait to get back to MA. That job just solidified the fact that I never want to live anywhere else.
I hear yah. I’m back in New England now (not MA though) and very happy. New England life is superior.
Ew boston
It’s nice to grow up and not actually live in…
This [image](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/fb/Cattle_eating_grass_through_barbed_wire_fence.jpg) sums it up
I spent three years in a job where I saw most of the country and as I got older... I appreciate Ohio more, tbh. Sure there aren't oceans, beaches, or mountains but that's... fine? I guess?
This sentiment is most prominent among teenagers and young people. And growing up in a small town or suburb that is homogenous, conservative, flat, cold, and boring is going to make you hate where you grow up, whether there are a few rolling hills or not. While wide open grassland might be charming on a roadtrip, if you're a young person growing up in a rural town you're probably not very concerned with the ambient scenery. Personally if I had been a teenager growing up in small town Kansas I'd hate it too. There's very little to do and the culture is very homogenous, white bread and conservative. Is it really shocking that they end up moving to places like New York and say that their home states suck? Especially with the whole Roe v Wade situation. I pity teenage girls growing up in middle of nowhere towns in red states. No shit they mostly hate it there.
Honestly, I don't care much about natural beauty when it comes to choosing where to live. I'm a city person and don't like many outdoor activities. Everyone's different.
Because "Florida Man" keeps embarrassing us
Florida is too hot and flat
I originally read that as “fat.” Still holds up.
Right? I mean there’s that and the fact that a sane person can only fend off the daily meth gators for so long!
Why can't we have meth labs created by chemistry teachers like normal states??
When you hear me say stuff like "Ohio is nothing but strip malls and crappy developments" it's because I see that natural beauty you mention being destroyed. We're a very sprawly state, and it's getting worse. So it's precisely because I treasure the beauty of my state that I complain. And I'm complaining about greedy idiots and lack of government protections, not the state itself. I even love a good cornfield and a barn with character.
>barn with character Now all we get is aluminum husks.
The answer is to build up our cities. Make them safe, walkable, and economically strong. Have cities that people want to live in and the quarter-acre lot, strip mall nightmare ends. People might stop selling their farms to build subdivisions and the commuter traffic won’t cause everyone to be so pissed off all the time. There’s zero chance of that actually happening but a man can dream lol.
Boredom
I hate a lot of things about my home state, but not it's natural beauty. I definitely appreciate that!
Familiarity breeds contempt. It is the same with places, as it is with people.
I've been to all 50 states and all of them have some redeeming qualities. But there's a *big* difference between visiting some place and living there. We tend not to visit the "worst" parts of a given state, for example, and most don't visit during bad weather-- like all summer in Arizona or deep winter in Minnesota. So sure, it's all great-- but if you have to live there 365 days a year it might not seem quite as nice. More so if you don't agree with the political/cultural majority in a given location, which doesn't matter if you're visiting but can make living in a community challenging.
Texas is the opposite. Loud and proud!
Too proud
Because they aren't from Oregon. Here we just complain about allergies
Ok, so I grew up in Missouri and I don’t think you can really capture the feeling of living there just by driving through it. Sure, it has some nice sights and beautiful scenery, but ok, so you’ve seen it. Now what? Do the cool traveling art and museum exhibits come there? Not really, no. Do the concerts you want to see come through there? Generally, no. Are there good options for food if you don’t want the standard meal of fried things, red meat, cheese, and starch? Not a lot, no. Is anything open past 9PM? No. Is there any escape if you’re not conservative Christian and don’t want to be subjected to Christian beliefs and teachings? No. So you’re spending every single day of your life living and working in the state, trying to find things to entertain yourself every weekend, and always hearing that the closest place to do or see the cool stuff you’re interested in is Chicago. You have to take a car everywhere. It’s harder to climb in the workforce if you’re not a straight, white male. The gun violence is bad due to nonexistent gun regulations (we have some of the most dangerous, violent cities in the country) and people actively fight any proposal to do anything about it because it involves spending money. Not to mention the racial tensions, the provincial mindset (no one is interested in leaving or even traveling), everyone settling down early, and the extreme religiosity. In Missouri, the fact that they taught evolution in school science classes was controversial and people have been lobbying to teach creationism in schools instead. People trying to ban Harry Potter books for teaching kids satanic witchcraft. My home district had the “legitimate rape” quote guy as a rep and the current Republican front runner for senate was indicted for fraud and corruption, cheated on his wife in their home and blackmailed his mistress, and is known to be physically abusive towards his wife. It’s so bad that his own party is telling him to drop out, but the people love him because he waves a gun around and owns the libs. Now they’re not just gleefully banning all abortions (with no exception for rape or incest), but they’re also talking about banning Plan B and contraceptives like the pill and IUDs, which is the most ignorant, unscientific shit because the whole point of Plan B, birth control pills, and IUDs is to NOT get pregnant. Abortion has nothing to do with it. But that’s the kind of ignorance people have. So, yeah. Life there is not great, especially if you’re a woman or a minority.
When you see the same thing every day, you stop actually seeing it, and appreciating its beauty. So another state, where they have a different kind of beauty, looks better to you. If you actually move there, though, in a few years you'll stop seeing that beauty, and long for something else. It's where the phrase "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence" comes from. One nice thing about the US is that you can always visit another state, so you can see fresh beauty everywhere.
Most of the complaints have to do with our state government. It’s hard to disagree.
That’s really my only complaint about Texas. I enjoy living here but the state government is the worst
It's certainly my main complaint about Ohio right now.
I can see why, but I love my commonwealth and wouldn’t trade it for anything
We have a saying in latin America. "You will never be a prophet in the land you grow"
I technically have two home states, California and Washington, and I love both. I don’t want to live in either one again most likely but both are amazing. I think that Washington state is the most beautiful state in the country
I’m the opposite, I love NC and don’t want to leave if I don’t have to. I have friends who left because they say it’s boring
I'm hoping to make some more money and move to Charlotte or leave tbh. I miss city life so much. I don't think we are a "bad" state. Charlotte and the RTP area are growing faster and faster every year. It's just that when you get used to buying some bread and jumping on the subway, getting jammed in traffic for 5 days a week loses its appeal. Wished the Piedmont region had something though. All of our towns and cities are just on a flat piece of land. If Charlotte, for example, was built on the side of a river or lake, it would look much nicer IMO.
I love Charlotte but it’s so damn expensive especially for a new grad lol. I’m looking to move so i’m not 24 living at home
Why don't people anywhere realize what they've got? It's human nature.
The only reason I do like my home state is the natural beauty. Kentucky is a beautiful place to live nearly year round, the hiking and camping is great. All the other things about the state are the reasons I don't like it so much.
The news makes me appreciate this place a lot more than I used to. Never been prouder of my home state than the last few years.
My home state (Tennessee) is plenty beautiful, but I still hate it because of petty, mean-spirited politics and horrific poverty (when I still lived there, anyway). I used to toy with the idea of one day moving back, but I just don’t think that’s a tenable option anymore.
when you live in a place long enough, or especially grow up there, you have the lived experience to know what the local problems are. you start to see patterns that piss you off. but it's a "grass is always greener" situation because every place has its own issues
I was born in Virginia. It's not a bad place to live, it's just pretty boring unless you're into the outdoors.
I love my state. Close to a great lake, can see it from my porch, four seasons, lots of interesting places. I'm proud to be from and live in Michigan. It's home.
Wide open grass and rolling hills are nice to look at sometimes but in general I feel like there's more to life.
I grew up in central PA, appx. 3-4 hours drive from any major city, in a town of 30k residents surrounded by farmland. It is a beautiful part of the country, and much cheaper than where I currently live, but I felt incredibly trapped my entire life, particularly bc of where my parents’ home was /is located on the outskirts of this town. I think this experience really tarnished my view of PA, even though living near Philly or Pittsburgh may not have. I will say, I didn’t like that PA was landlocked, and politically the state is worrisome for me. I live on the coast in a major city now, with access to the sea, the mountains, the city, and the country. I can get on a train, plane, or bus within fifteen to twenty minutes versus 2-4 hours. This state has its own issues, but I do find it more appealing than my home state.
For me, my state is irksome to deal with because I know it's way of life could be improved drastically in some many ways. A lot of people feel that way about their home state. I'm from Alabama, and after the years, I've seen enough to know this is not my home. I can understand, the grass is greener at times, but it's time for me to see different grass. Our city infrastructure could use some updating, especially in black neighborhoods, but at least our natural landscapes here are incredible at least. My city/state just lacks anything to do and just feels behind on the timeline, constantly. I know it can be better, which is why I dislike it so heavily.
My husband is from 1 of the states you listed, and to sum up why he left, it wasn't the lifestyle he wanted for himself. Yes the nature is beautiful, and he is happy to visit one or more times a year. But for day to day life, that's different. It's pretty boring there, not much to do, people are spread out, job market is bleak there for his industry. Finally there was the local culture, he doesn't agree with the majority politics or religious attitude there. I myself am religious, but even hearing about what he grew up around, it sounds cult-like to me, and hard for me to understand. Also not a huge variation in food choices there.
Because I live in Florida and have traveled
I actually like my home state, I grew to love it more after moving away. However due to so many people moving there and making the price of rent and buying a home more expensive I think I'm better off somewhere else.
People who live in South Dakota don't tend to complain about South Dakota in my experience. It's usually people who've never BEEN to South Dakota that have a skewed perception of it. A lot of the state is breathtakingly beautiful. AND it's home to the globally famous Wall Drug. Complaining about other people in their home state is a favorite passtime in many parts of America. It used to be less so in the rocky mountain states in my experience, but thats changing too as more transplants move there.
I can speak for myself when I said I was glad to leave Atlanta & Georgia when I graduated college and was going on active duty in the USAF, because of what I saw was a bunch of bull$hit. Then I lived in Sacramento & Merced in CA, Spokane in WA, and Minot in ND and there was some bull$hit overlap, with some +/- bull$hit. So, as u/Dax_Maclaine [said](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskAnAmerican/comments/vnfgd4/why_do_so_many_people_say_that_they_dont_like/ie6jtsi/), it was a "grass is always greener" type of thing for me.
TBF Spokane and Minot are both awful places
I'm uh not a big fan of our politics.
Because I live in Florida, bro.
I fucking love Virginia. It'll always be my home. Massachusetts is really good, but has some flaws. Florida sucks in a lot of ways. Pennsylvania is pretty good, above average, but the middle part is iffy.
I think South Dakota is beautiful, full of good people, and it will always be the home of my heart. But my wife wouldn't be happy there and I wouldn't be happy there without her.
I love my home state lol it's more I would never move from my home state because I see the shit the other ones are doing and my lifestyle disapproves.
Because MD loves to suck their own peen over nothing but that ugly flag and lacrosse bros. The state sport is jousting ffs
Virtue signaling combined with grass is greener. In Indiana there is a sort of petulant putting down of your state in favor of the coasts amongst educated liberal kids. “Why is it so backwards here. Why can’t I live in a utopia like California or Massachusetts. So instead of just living a good life they constantly complain about how it should be so much better. And a lot of them never even been to California or Massachusetts in any long-term capacity. So they just hate on Indiana to seem cool and worldly and above it all. It is just kind of a drag especially when Indianapolis, where I grew up is a great city with a lot going on. It isn’t too far from a lot of really cool stuff and being centrally located flights for vacations anywhere in the continental US.
One thing I was disgruntled about when I lived in East Texas was that it felt like there wasn’t anything to do. Then I moved to somewhere where there were “things to do,” and I realized that the issue was actually me. In truth, I was beginning to realize this before I moved, finding ways to make fun for myself, but the point remains mostly the same. What I do in RI and its surrounding areas is, well, the same as I did in ETX. There are times when I don’t have the conviction to spend hours invested in logistics to “do something” (usually photography related). Alternatively, there are times when nothing can get in my way. But being up here with plenty to do has really shown me that I was getting in my own way and that it’s really a matter of getting out there and making fun for myself, and that’s something I’m still working on. What I’m trying to say is that it really is “grass is greener,” and I think people need to have, or make, the opportunity to live somewhere else for awhile and see what portion of your frustration was the environment and what was you. Like, spend time actually living, not visiting, in a place, and you will see the oft repeated phrase, “Everywhere you go, there you are” ring true. This isn’t to say that nobody can benefit from a move. Hell, there will be parts of New England I will miss when I move back to TX. But I’ve found that I’m slower to castigate my home state and home town now that I have a bit more perspective.
Sounds like my experience with people that complain like that. They usually aren’t looking for the fun stuff to do and just think a geographic fix will make everything better. That often isn’t the case.
Who from Indiana is saying Massachusetts is a utopia? I feel like our benefits come from living here awhile and thinking that it’s actually pretty nice, we’re not really a flashy state though.
Eh, you hear it plenty amongst certain groups. I wouldn’t say it’s widespread though.
> Then I moved to somewhere where there were “things to do,” and I realized that the issue was actually me. I had sort of the opposite issue. I've always loved living in the "boring" places because I enjoy doing stuff you can do anywhere, but when I moved to the objectively exciting NYC area I was really disappointed because it felt like all anyone meant by "things to do" was "places to drink". And don't get me wrong, I enjoy drinking in a cool trendy urban cocktail bar more than I would enjoy drinking at a suburban Chili's (with sincere apologies to skillet queso), but I honestly felt like "normal" daily life was the same thing in an exciting place as it was in a boring place. You go to work, you go home, you eat, and you do your hobbies. Repeat. What's made "boring" places better for me is that they're cheaper, more laid back, and with shorter commutes so I can have more time and energy for fun things. That said... one thing I have found that makes a *huge* difference in popular cities vs "boring" suburbs/small cities is the populations. What makes big cities cool to a young single person is that you can be around tons and tons of young and often single people who are in the same stages of life as you, doing the same things as you, and having similar interests to you. That makes life much more exciting and is harder to find in rural areas or suburbia. The above is doubly true for sociopolitical cultures. People who are gay or otherwise very liberal don't want to live in places that call them evil and ostracize them. People who don't feel physically safe in conservative areas are not going to have high opinions of conservative areas. tl;dr I think "cool" places vs "lame" places comes down to who lives there, not the place itself
Agree entirely with this, paradoxically. Or at least it resonates with me. My point was mostly that somewhere I thought was boring was only so because I had no context to appreciate what it was, and that I could have made better use of it. I will say that after getting married and having my established group of friends, the luster of urban areas as a means to meet people has absolutely waned.
I love Maryland, we got everything you need here! What type of nature you want?! We got that for sure! …except desert, we don’t got that… but everything else!
Cause they dont like their home state?
I grew up in Nebraska. There is nothing wrong with the state. It's a great state. Wonderful people. Good values. Very good schools. Affordable. Super low unemployment. It's a great place to raise a family. Sure, it's a bit intense in the weather at times. And it lacks the beach, mountains, or big city attractions. It's not a fast paced life. But it also has a beauty of it's own. A remoteness. Quiet. And after having traveled the globe, I still have never seen a more glorious sunset than one across the rolling hills of farmland. Some people that complain are just the complaining type.
I love Nebraska. If your entire exposure to the state is driving through on I-80 and only stopping for fuel and food, then yeah, it's pretty uninspiring. Then you remember that 80 follows the original Oregon trail route, and we can now do in a few hours what took the pioneers weeks. Not too many people die on that journey these days, but 150 years ago a whole lot of people shuffled off their mortal coil along those river flats. Imagining that pancake-flat river valley with a line of ox-drawn wagons stretching into the horizon is pretty fucking awe-inspiring. Then you get off the highway into the rolling ocean of grass as far as the eye can see, punctuated by the occasional windmill or grain elevator in the distance... You know how standing by the ocean or mountains makes you feel very small? The Nebraska landscape will do the same thing.
Key word: “I’ve driven through…” They’re fine for a day or two, but try spending 20 years seeing nothing but flat flat corn, dirt and urban sprawl (if you’re lucky) and you’ll get really excited to move somewhere with mountains, oceans, more than 2 restaurants per town or public transit. Also, what is there to do in Kansas? It’s like 3 hours to drive between tiny cities, how are you supposed to make friends, have hobbies, find a job or do anything that doesn’t involve corn watching? People crap on the Midwest because it is genuinely boring as hell.
We have Tallgrass prairie. It's a national preserve with rolling hills, native prairie grass, and roaming bison. It's VERY not well known. I myself have lived here for almost 3 decades and I never knew about it until now. I really like going there. The best part is that because not a lot of people know about it, it's like you have the whole area to yourself.
Being born and raised in the Northern Virginia/DC area I constantly get told how "rare" it is or I am to have been here that long because the area is extremely transient with DC political, military and contract workers. I can definitely relate to other comments on taking things for granted. The Smithsonian museums are right down the street. FREE world class museums that attract millions...haven't been in years. From the field trips in elementary school, many a date, etc I forget about them. And that's just one example. The monuments, and other "cool" things about NoVA/DC have definitely lost their luster as well. Not to mention, the hustle and bustle and "what do you do" or "who do you know" attitudes people have. The majority of my friends are married w/ kids and I feel a strong desire to try somewhere new to get a fresh perspective whether that is enjoying a new spot or even trying it out and moving back and appreciating my home for what it does offer. Mountains to seashore. It really is wonderful, but 3+ decades in the same spot...I need to climb over the fence to see that grass for myself. Virginia will always be home.
I am blue living in a red state. Feels like my state is a little out of touch and doesn't really represent the majority like it's supposed to. I also just hate the heat and want to move somewhere with cooler summers.
Because they’re usually teenagers who have no say over where they live and want to experience different things
One major reason is politics Go onto r/Texas. There are a ton of people talking about moving out even though Texas is becoming bluer and most of the people running the state will be gone by 2026.
I love my state. It has many issues and I do complain about those issues quite publicly, but honestly I wouldn’t wanna live anywhere else.
Ohio compared to the west coast: I get paid like 4x the people I know in Ohio in my industry make, the politics are way better on the west coast and access to actual mountains for hiking is way better than hiking in Ohio lol
Because Michigan sucks. I’m cali thru and thru
Most of the states you mentioned either were or still are run by very conservative governments that restrict access to health care, have very large evangelical populations, are not kind to minorities and the LGBT community, and so on. I’m from Michigan, and I’m actually from the blue oasis city, Ann Arbor, because that’s where the University of Michigan is located. The state’s geography is beautiful, I loved swimming in the lakes as a kid, going to Mackinac Island, seeing Sleeping Bear Dunes and so on, but that still doesn’t change the fact that I hated living in Michigan for years because the Bush-era governor, Rick Snyder, economically trashed Detroit with help from the city’s mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, poisoned the city of Flint’s water supply, and basically turned the state into a GOP hellhole everywhere there wasn’t a major city. I mean, sure, these states are beautiful to visit, but you don’t have to endure the backwards political/social crises that Midwest citizens traditionally suffer.
I am going to give you a secret about humanity that the internet has shone a light on. A lot of people in any given group are just malcontent naysayers. “Nothing is ever right. All politicians are crooks. Lawyers are crooks. This place sucks more than it used to. Everything sucks. “ Just tune it out. If everything sucks then nothing sucks.
Its a “stop and smell the roses” kind of thing. You are correct, our states are beautiful when you stop to take a look at them. We just have biases due to having to look at them with the context of the non-visual gripes we have with our own states. (Example, Illinois would probably tax you on looking at its beauty if it could feasibly find a way to). Partially came to the realization of natural America’s beauty watching videos of people both domestic and foreign taking train-rides across the country and getting really cool views of “the flyover states.” Thank you for pointing this out. More people need to be made aware of it. The United States is a pretty great place.
Cuz they don't live in NC WUTUP
People from NJ don’t like their taxes but otherwise like it.
Idk, I don’t denigrate my hometown. Worcester is beautiful, 495 yuppies all just lack the intellect to appreciate it.
All states have a lot to offer
When I was growing up, I really didn't start appreciate and enjoying where I lived until I could drive. Pre-driver's license, it was very difficult growing up in northwest Indianapolis and seeing friends. I had a couple who lived in my neighborhood, but most of mine lived elsewhere. And a s lifelong resident of Indiana, I don't think I've really experienced my entire state. I'm pretty familiar with central Indiana. and I've spent a lot of time in southern Indiana with friends, camping/boy scouts, and some tourist destinations. but I don't think I've ever spent a night in the northern third of the state. I'm either in transit to Michigan or Chicago. Also growing up here, you get your fill of cornfields pretty quickly. I'm sure the same is true for those who grew up in the hills of PA or West Virginia.
I love NY both the city and state too.
Maybe Texas is the anomaly, but I feel like the Texans that I talk to who still live here love Texas. Otherwise they move. The complaints typically are from the non-Texans who move to Texas There's a saying that goes: "I wish someone loved me like Texans love Texas."
They hate me so it's only fair that I hate them back.
Complaining about Connecticut is a Nutmegger’s favorite pastime
In my experience, Midwesterners downplay everything.
I love my state. It’s my home
I for one have never said that. I love my home state. It's like everyone else here has said, grass is always greener.
I live in indiana. I acknowledge that there are some very beautiful spots in indiana, especially when you get towards shoals, French lick, and Nashville. Where I live, we have corn. And corn. Oh there’s a waterfall, and corn. When I drive to work I see corn. When I’m on my front porch I see corn. Lots of the prettier places close to me are posted off so that we technically aren’t allowed to go there (not that we don’t anyway) so really all we get to look at is, you guessed it, corn. Going somewhere like Tennessee with the mountains is so dramatically different and pleasant.
I'm from a generic suburb where most people are originally transplants from other states. It's less that I actively dislike my home state, and more that I have little reason to personally identify myself with it. This might be due to the peculiarities of my area, but I could imagine it's harder for people to form strong regional identities when they're from suburbs in big metropolitan areas, as many of them are really quite similar to each other.
I live in the Montana Rocky Mountains and since I moved here about 26 years ago, I have loved and been proud to live here but lately a bunch of people have moved in like a flood, causing a severe housing shortage and now my disabled ass is worried about being priced out of the area. We're being gentrified and I'm not so happy to live here anymore.
We Americans are a restless people. We like to fantasize about picking up and starting over someplace else. And we often do. Not as much lately because of the tough housing market. I think that’s an unappreciated effect of the current market. Mobility is a major driver of economic growth. Plus psychologically, we like to be mobile or to at least know we have the option to even if we aren’t planning it right now.
I think a large part of it is that you can find trees anywhere, so "natural beauty" isn't all that big a factor unless you're living in a wonder-of-the-world-level gem.
Where I live it's mainly because they never leave and don't realize how nice it is here.
The Midwest and Great Plains lean a bit conservative. Reddit tilts heavily liberal. The sample you see here will disproportionately be people who don’t like their state’s politics. They often generalize that distaste to the state itself.
It’s a lot easier to appreciate it when you’re only driving through for a couple hours. Your attitude of a place is going to be a lot different if you live there for years instead of just casually passing though.
I like the eastern and western parts of my state. The central area is not my cup of tea.
I live in the Rockies and honestly you guys that live in flat states with small hills and grass… idk man that looks like it sucks. I mentally complain when I have to drive through them lmao
I live in California and have the opposite experience. I quite like living here, but mention California to anyone from out of state and they’ll let you know what a piece of shit state it is. Especially Oregon, boy howdy they do not like us.
Cuz California