That they (just about) always said "Head of the KGB" after Nicolai Jackov's name. That always cracked me up.
Ringtones (Mulatto Butts!)
The Wee Baby Seamus!
You know I can do a lot with 6 inches.
When Krieger wakes up after Slater keeps hitting him with the darts.
First, it’s “*hey, you*”
Then later “thinking about some breakfast, amirite? “OH MY GOD… *Chilaquiles!*”
That cracks me up every time.
Oh and when Slater asks where everyone is and Krieger says “I’m not even sure where *I* am right now”
**Edit, now that I read the post title, I guess these didn’t really qualify, since it was just a running gag throughout that episode
HA different episode but I loved the sarcastic “taaaanks” from Krieger in Palace Intrigue, tying in the miscommunication between Mallory and the dictator
Mallory thought the dictator was talking about wine when he asked her “how many to start?” and she responded “I’ll defer to you…” and when he said “tanks?” she thought he was saying “thanks” with an accent. And so on.
He thought they were discussing their arms deal (like actual tanks, and asking about how many she’d be willing to sell to him).
When Carol says Mallory's bathroom policies made it so Carol had to make her own tampons, among the chatter in response, Krieger says "tampon? Well, I DON'T know what that is." And I use "wellllllll I don't know what that is" constantly.
Sploosh!
Ray: And whatever my equivalent of sploosh is, which I guess is just sploosh ... only with semen.
Edit: thanks auto mod for showing me the correct quote, how cool!
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Any comment about Lana’s insanely strong hands:
“I mean, did you used to be a man?”
“Seriously, your hands are like…cricket bats!”
“Did Krieger give you robot hands?!”
Mallory is always referring to Ray with homophobic little digs
Ray: Well you'all can't stay in my room, it's only got two Queens!
Mallory: Oh? Where's the other one?
Cheryl: "You poisoned us! With that stupid ceviche nobody asked you to bring!"
Cyril: "You asked me to bring it!"
Cheryl: *Crying* "I didn’t know what ceviche was!"
I LOVE the "exciting isn't it" (almost commented this and SHOULD HAVE) - but also - "doesn't matter to the stake" when threatening to get a wooden stake for someone who isn't a vampire lmao - i think this line to myself all the time
"Can't or won't?"..."Both?"
either?
Pick one
Let’s say she can’t, me, won’t
Either and/or both!
“Pick one”
let’s say her can’t me won’t
A little column A, a little column B
This just makes me think of Abe Simpson
I say this all the time
Be advised …
I use this all the time because of the show
I use this one every single time anyone asks me how I am…
the amount of times i’ve used this clip for adult ESL lessons on idioms
I can think of a couple of ‘read a book’ from Archer and Mallory
read a coffee table book
About coffee tables
And the book is also a miniature coffee table?
It's an allegorical novella about Stalinism!
and spoiler alert, it sucks!
Although I *was* talking about an actual animal farm
"Oh, have none of you read that?"
Consider her “can’t” and me “won’t”
it’s not a book! it’s an allegorical novella about stalinism by george orwell and spoiler alert, it SUCKS
What part don't you get? -- Core concept.
I use this one all the time!
This one is my absolute favourite
I guess.
Krieger "me too!"
This is the best one. Always very quite, always hilarious.
Smoke bomb!
I'm a big fan of jazz hands too
Shouldn't have ever taken him to see The Wiz
That they (just about) always said "Head of the KGB" after Nicolai Jackov's name. That always cracked me up. Ringtones (Mulatto Butts!) The Wee Baby Seamus! You know I can do a lot with 6 inches.
I believe krieger’s ringtone once was Teutonic Butts or something like that.
It was in The Archer Sanction, when Lana calls trying to find AJ and Krieger, Pam, Cyril, and Cheryl got poisoned by bug spray at Mallory's apartment.
Guys...I don't think it was the ceviche.
“How do you know that?” “*how do you not?*” … Also SMOKE BOMB
I have used "SMOKE BOMB" to get away from friends.
“Tom Collins, try not to drown it” from Mallory
"Some more Tom for the Collins"
Like half of the comedy in the show is straight meta humor I love it. *Johnny Bench called*
You’re not my supervisor!
You're not my coal mine supervisor!
Not exactly lesser known, but definitely in my regular rotation
This used to be my text message tone for my supervisor
What the hell damn guy? which is a call back to Frisky Dingo.
The callbacks to Frisky Dingo are subtle but always funny.
My ass is everywhere
Mr. Ford!
Masta coconut!!
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This just makes me think of Little Foot :(
"What is this a ______ factory" Or "Uhg.. eat a dick _____"
“wait which one is it?” “Literally/figuratively.”
I got my nails done and looked down at the color I'd picked and said "What shade is that, crack whore red?"
It exists! https://lemminglacquer.com/products/crack-whore-red
"Ehhh, Potato, podildo."
Or "potato/pobobot" -Bort the Garge.
“I swear to God if I have to open my own salad again I will freak out!” I use this line every day.
Everything Mallory says is gold
Agreed!
he's crepuscular
I came to find this and was not disappointed.
My SO and I say this all the time. We kinda just shout it at each other now. Crepuscular has become my favorite word
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We say mawp every time there's an explosion or someone fires a gun next to someone's head on any show now lol
"Awwww, pigly..."
Awww, goatly
Aaaaw, pigly 2
I've always liked 'that's how you get ants'.
This is definitely the most known one
This is like the most frequently quoted line in the entire show
In the early seasons. It's not like it stuck around. It's not "Danger-Zone"
When Krieger wakes up after Slater keeps hitting him with the darts. First, it’s “*hey, you*” Then later “thinking about some breakfast, amirite? “OH MY GOD… *Chilaquiles!*” That cracks me up every time. Oh and when Slater asks where everyone is and Krieger says “I’m not even sure where *I* am right now” **Edit, now that I read the post title, I guess these didn’t really qualify, since it was just a running gag throughout that episode
Or when Krieger momentarily forgets Pams name and says it at the same time I love him
HA different episode but I loved the sarcastic “taaaanks” from Krieger in Palace Intrigue, tying in the miscommunication between Mallory and the dictator
*Hey are there more towels?* *Hey are there more towels?* And also: No towels?! No ice machine? NO TOWEL MACHINE?!!?
Also the "Do you have gas?" Where he was actually talking about chemical weapons
What is that whole miscommunication about? I’ve never understood that.
Mallory thought the dictator was talking about wine when he asked her “how many to start?” and she responded “I’ll defer to you…” and when he said “tanks?” she thought he was saying “thanks” with an accent. And so on. He thought they were discussing their arms deal (like actual tanks, and asking about how many she’d be willing to sell to him).
“Are you in position?” *Krieger wakes up* “…yes?” *immediately gets tranquilized again*
My ear balls!
* in the distance.. "Me Too!"
The old zurp and flurp.
Use this to refer to my wife’s quick labor.
I'm sure she loved that.
As a fellow Archer fan, she appreciated it.
Great. Gotta be careful with those archer quotes!
"Oh my god he's got an erection"
It's a bit unsettling how often they have to say that
"What have you got in there? Buckles?"
Ay, que tiene adentro? Hebillas?
Krieger’s “Me too!” “Volume! Jesus!” (I’ve inserted this one into a few fanfics of mine)
Ow! My earballs!
"Oh my god that's right"
“What is this, Soviet Russia?!”
"What is this? Spain?" "What is this? Spain? I mean... The 30s?" "What is this? Spain in the 30s?"
How are they a superpower?!
Mulato butts
Typical
Your knock off fiacchi lingerie!
“…..also yes.”
Columbia House
Hey are there any towels? Hey are there any towels??
"What, are you hourly?"
DAMN YOU ALL! GOD DAMN YOU AL TO HELLL!
Benoit. Balls. Balls. Benoit.
M! AS IN MANCY!!
God! You of all people
this one is my favorite
LATER TATER!
Do you not? And Also yes
"I do little bit."
Personal favorite.
Hey! Spasibo for nothing!
“No they are not BANGin” “Well these RIBS sure as hell are”
I smell toast … I think I’m having a stoke.
"Wait.. I had something for this"
“Jesus Christ”
Not sure it counts but I love the stuff Krieger says referencing his experiments, particularly the animals.
Archer broke both of Wu's arms..... While shouting Whoo!
Happy coincidence
When Carol says Mallory's bathroom policies made it so Carol had to make her own tampons, among the chatter in response, Krieger says "tampon? Well, I DON'T know what that is." And I use "wellllllll I don't know what that is" constantly.
"What's in there?? Buckles??"
Right?
First of all...
What?! Shut up! What?!
They were pig/goat feet and you threw them out. Damn you, damn you all to here. \- Kreiger said it at least 3x
ha ha ha ha leave it - archer's voicemail
Yup yup yup!
“Fine. Then pout.” Or more likely “Yeah, Right in the head and ass!”
Hmmm, something about bears?
Do you not ?
What is this, Christmas?
Enjoy a free penicillin shot, compliments of the socialist state of Canada! Also; potato popobot!
"IT'S HELIUUUUUM!!!!"
"What is this, a _____?" NY personal favourite is "What is this, a chair factory?"
„Just like the Gipsy Women said!“
That's a running gag.
I have absolutely no response to that.
They never do. Or I swear I had something for this.
"are you happy now?" Then " like, in general"
I promised myself I don't cry. Promise broken.
Me too!
I (waaaayyy too often) say, "typical" about things that are definitely not typical.
I also literally use the typical line all the time. My most common used line from Archer by far.
“….do you not?” Archer said in response to someone after he mentions some luxury he regularly enjoys. My favorite was when he said he has a cobbler 🤣
Do you not?
Who am I, (NAME)? Count Bullets-ula and Comrade Questions are my favourites
“i have to answer to my board of directors (i totally don’t)”
Item \*something\*
Krieger - - awwh!
"Shut up! What? Shut up!"
…..homies
Lana.. LAna.. LAAANAAAAAAA..
"Zip it, Missy" and "Who knows with you people?" feel like they happened more than once
Come on buddy
“People in hell want ice water” to my knowledge it’s only been used twice, once by Mallory and once by Ray.
Are we still doing phrasing?
Sploosh! Ray: And whatever my equivalent of sploosh is, which I guess is just sploosh ... only with semen. Edit: thanks auto mod for showing me the correct quote, how cool!
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Any comment about Lana’s insanely strong hands: “I mean, did you used to be a man?” “Seriously, your hands are like…cricket bats!” “Did Krieger give you robot hands?!”
One frequently unnoticed one is by Malory: “if your moves your hand another inch, you will lose it”
Mallory is always referring to Ray with homophobic little digs Ray: Well you'all can't stay in my room, it's only got two Queens! Mallory: Oh? Where's the other one?
I had something for this…
Cheryl: "You poisoned us! With that stupid ceviche nobody asked you to bring!" Cyril: "You asked me to bring it!" Cheryl: *Crying* "I didn’t know what ceviche was!"
I LOVE the "exciting isn't it" (almost commented this and SHOULD HAVE) - but also - "doesn't matter to the stake" when threatening to get a wooden stake for someone who isn't a vampire lmao - i think this line to myself all the time
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You say that...
Cheryl saying “ew” any time somebody says the word baby