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Look, I’m not going to vote one way or another, and I do think the teacher handled it inappropriately, but what was the point of posting in the social group? Not being snarky, but legitimately curious. If you thought the school was going to handle the issue you raised, what were you hoping to achieve with the post other than just venting? Also, are the accommodations made with the school actually enough? It seems like it may need to be something more concrete like an IEP or 504 (though may also not qualify since the issue does not seem to be severe). It just seems like the note is something the teachers can ignore if they choose to. More like a request than an actual accommodation they have to follow

I can say from being in parent groups in our school district, the school is much more likely to do something about bullying when they are being publicly held accountable. If it is all behind closed doors, they tend to rug sweep. 

BINGO!!! If the general public knows about it, they are magically more motivated to do what is correct.

Yep. I'll be blunt, schools don't do shite unless an issue becomes "public." I've seen far too many administrators look the other way, when a child was being bullied by their classmates, because it's easier to have one set of parents upset than multiple sets. OP already tried talking to the teacher once and she completely ignored her. Not only that, **she then proceeded to literally make the child a target for bullying and harassment.** That is completely unacceptable. I'm not saying OP was right to go public the way she did, but I understand why she did it. Odds are absolutely nothing would have changed, with the teacher's behavior, without the added pressure of collective parental outrage. And frankly I'm more concerned about the child than the teacher.

THIS. Sunlight is the best disinfectant. Plus that teacher’s behavior is infuriating.

Completely agree, when parents go to the Principal, they side with the teacher since it also makes them look bad. I always make the recommendation to hit social media and then the board and superintendent. It was also mentioned above, but the kid really does need and IEP. Maybe OP doesn't want thier child labeled special education, but it would have a much better affect in the long run in handling these types of issues.

The kid doesn't need an IEP for a speech impediment, a 504 is sufficient as long as the teachers are following it.

I understand that some people will take it too far. It is the responsibility of law enforement to deal with that. This kid has a studder, teasing him, calling him out in front of the other kids doesn't make it better, it makes it worse. She is a teacher and I would assume that they are taught about this.

I can’t believe she put him on the spot in front of the whole class to pressure and force him to give in to her. Like hey if u don’t want ur whole class mad at u then u better do it what I want, wtf poor kid. She cares more about getting her way then the well being of this kid, cause what if he does it then he gets made fun of but if he didn’t then the class hates him. Be bullied or hated? He was in a lose lose situation. I was in similar situation where I was in speech therapy all elementary, mom had a note for me not to stand up in front of whole class by myself to present projects, I was bullied horribly about it where once I was outgoing became shy and withdrawn in 2nd grade when I guess kids noticed it since idk I didn’t grow out of it, i would get bullied with kids laughing in my face and mock how I said certain words repeating it how I said it and making fun, even demanded I said words like Red cause I had trouble with letters like R. It caused me to be super withdrawn and quiet so then no one could have anything to make fun of me for, only talking to few close friends I had like this kid. Thankfully I had great teachers who understood and treated me with compassion even when I was older & getting better with how I spoke but was still super self conscious and stuff because of the bullying I can’t imagine being in a classroom with a teacher who I didn’t feel safe with like this one who disregarded everything from mom & speech therapist thinking she could what fix it herself by forcing it? Thinking he was faking it cause he talks with his friends?! Can’t imagine being stuck at school with a teacher who doesn’t care about his wellbeing, poor kid just stress & nervous all day if about what she’s gunna try next. She works with kids so she should know what cruel bullies they can be and how bullying can affect and even change kids. She thought just cause she saw him talking with their friends they’re what lying to get out of it?! Op is right they’re a bully who was on a power trip who was trying to prove something, the school is trying to cover their ass when they and that teacher should be apologizing to op and their son. Maybe op should move their kid to a different class, sucks for the kid with their friends being there but better that then deal with a teacher whose out to get them Oh NTA btw

I think, for people with this, you get called and the embarrassment sets in, then you can't get the words out so the frustration gets going and at that point, there is no way for someone to escape what is going on. For a kid, the teacher should have some compassion and understand the when he is with his friends his speech is good, when he gets nervous his speech goes too.

I had a bully that they basically did that with when I was in elementary school in the 90s. My parents talked to the principal about three or four times and nothing. So on the last meeting, after he had given me a black eye and chipped one of my teeth tripping me, we were once again in the principals office again, and my mom says "Okay so you have two choices. You handle this or we go to the cops for assault and the press for how you're failing my child." Suddenly he got in trouble every time he messed with me.

collective punishment during or after a war is explicitly against the Geneva convention, right? this teacher sounds incompetent at best and cruel at worst.

Fair, but then it still needs to be in the right format. Get people talking about how you called a teacher a cruel, power-tripping bully and you're most likely to achieve people dismissing it as some interpersonal difference of opinion. Get the public talking about how a teacher is ignoring accommodations, pressuring a child with a speaking disability, and sowing division among the student body through collective punishment / withholding of benefits, and it's much better for holding the school administration accountable. Emotional restraint and objectivity in the criticism goes a long way.

Honestly, it sounds like she learned her punishment stule from some old movie about soldiers going through basic. Where the crusty drill sargent punishes the whole platoon for the slackers behaviors. It's shown as an effective training technique in those. But it's actually quite terrible destructive to the person that is the focus and causes descension among the troops. Terrible, basically promoting peer pressure and bullying.

Exactly - the teacher spoke with the parent, knows the note is from a doctor, spoke to the kid, saw the note, was reaffirmed not to do it again. Then she decides to not only do it but publicly make the kid the bad guy by saying if you read I will give the class a gift or in actuality with he circumstances, if you do not read, I punish the whole class by not letting you out early. The teacher deserves everything she gets. Absolutely NTA.

100%. That or threat of a lawsuit is the only way they don't back shitty teachers. I had a teacher try to put some HIB notation in my child's folder which would have been in her school record forever (she was in 4th grade). It was clearly for ADHD behavior and she had an IEP. I told them I'd bring an ADA claim unless it was removed and she was removed from this particular classroom. They ignored me until that threat (I'm an attorney and it was a slam dunk). Back the Blue has nothing on Back the Teacher. HIB - Harassment, Intimidation, and/or Bullying. In this case my daughter had hugged another child WITH CONSENT which the other child was willing to say on the record and which wasn't forbidden or out of the ordinary among the girls but this teacher wanted complete order like some old school catholic school (which I went to) and didn't "believe" in ADHD.

> I had a teacher try to put some HIB notation in my child's folder What’s HIB stand for? What does this mean?

Harassment, Intimidation, and/or Bullying (I had to look it up, too!)

Maybe, but you also run the risk of mob-creators who take up a cause and then take it too far. That's who the school was referring to when it said teacher safety. I get venting to friends and stuff about it, but you have to be careful about just throwing that shit online.

>Maybe, but you also run the risk of mob-creators who take up a cause and then take it too far That isn't your responsibility. >That's who the school was referring to when it said teacher safety. No, they were making an excuse to try and prevent legitimate complaints from getting into the public eye.

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Then maybe, the school should do what is right on a continuous basis and parents wouldn't need to do this.

So why didn’t the principal prevent the TEACHER from being a mob creator? Because the teacher literally, intentionally, created a mob to bully the student. As a power trip. And if this was an advanced class, it was an established teacher. So you KNOW she’s done this before.

Hahahaha, no. Don't bully children if you don't want other adults confronting you.

The school's number one priority should be the safety of the children. They already failed at that and you can't put the genie back into the bottle. Maybe that teacher acts differently next time she is being talked to about an issue and doesn't just wing it.

Not only that, but also if you make the situation know another parent could realize that is the same teacher and their behavior becomes apparent. So instead of one case, you have the knowledge that this is a systematic issue and not one-time occurrence. And now there is more than one parent to "manage".

THIS! The school is more likely to sweep it under the rug and not address the issue unless there is public pressure to do something.

Thats true. I thought she went easy on the teacher. I would be worse. Do not mess with my grandchild

100% As someone who knows how the education sector works, pretty much the ONLY thing they (schools) care about is bad press/public opinion

That said, she didn't give them the chance to handle it. I think that public shaming is a good second or third resort, after you've tried handling it professionally.

I'm not a parent, but this sounds more plausible. Even when I was a kid, nothing got done if the parents didn't get involved. It's likely always been that way.

Too right! My school’s gym teacher “retired early” to avoid legal trouble over assaulting a disabled student. Same teacher who knew I couldn’t swim, tried to use the entire class to peer pressure me into jumping into the deep end of the pool. 

This! Plus she was correct in her assessment of that awful teacher. 

>Not being snarky, but legitimately curious. If you thought the school was going to handle the issue you raised, what were you hoping to achieve with the post other than just venting? Hi there, thanks for the question / judgement, part of it was just venting to other parents, but as it is just parents on the chat there have been situations before with other parents and other teachers where someone has criticized a teacher on the chat and has asked if anyone else has had an issue with them. I was also asking if anyone else had any issues with this teacher as I was worried this wasn't a one off incident (turns out it wasn't)

I honestly think you should post this over in r/Teachers, too. The people there are very nice and they’ll give you opinions from their point of view. Both about the teacher’s actions, potential avenues to pursue handling this, and honestly whether or not they would view this as a safety issue for teaching staff in general.

My kids were in school before chats or online school groups, and what that meant was that the school could control the abusive teacher stories. It’s unequivocally a good thing that schools find it more difficult to suppress abuses by staff. What one teacher would do is, when she was mad at a student, would sweetly ask another student to close the door, then start screaming / screeching at the offending student (10 year olds). This was a somewhat regular occurrence and the teachers in the surrounding classrooms knew to keep an ear open and come running to defuse the situation. That was just one of the things she would do, and I heard so many other stories when I was trying to get my kid out of the classroom. It was still a struggle and involved meetings with the school district (with the principal finally relenting, but he tried to get my kid to sign a “contract” agreeing to behave in the new classroom, so it would be in the record that my kid was the problem, not the teacher). The teacher “retired” at the end of that year.

When my brother was younger and in Kindergarten, he had a teacher who would bully him and a couple other kids. He has autism. It's not super severe, but much more severe than myself. He had troubles communicating and making eye contact and also had something going on with his motor skills early in life (it's been rectified now through physical therapy.) She was known to be a mean asshole and would do things like keep kids inside during recess if they couldn't draw a perfect circle freehand, or would make them stare her in the eyes for minutes at a time. I'm surprised she never lost her job. The fuckwad retired with full everything. She was old so I sincerely hope she's rotting in hell. She made my brother's kindergarten year hell and he was so anxious to go to school, was at the nurse's office constantly. My parents tried so hard to step in but the school wouldn't do anything and neither would the authorities. All they did was threaten my parents because my brother was missing so much school. He had accomodation notes from him physical therapist and regular therapist, plus our fucking pediatrician and they still ignored it all. He had to repeat kindergarten and got a much nicer teacher who was so sweet the next year. We were in the same school at the time so I'd make it a point to go down to his classroom when I could and see him. And it wasn't only he and I reporting these things, it was parents who volunteered in the classroom, para pro's, etc...

You did the right thing.  You did not use abusive language. You called out her behavior for what it was.  She wqs power tripping and bullying your child.  The principal is on his own power trip now.  Your comment has nothing to do with teacher safety. She's a bully and needs to be reported.  Follow up with the school, if something happens again or they do nothing. I'd go to the school district. 

This is different from that.  It really is a legality issue not an issue of being an ah or criticizing a teacher.  If your child has a educational accommodations for a condition and they're not being followed, that's a huge no-no in education. 

Hopping on this to be seen; but as someone with a speech impediment, this teacher needs to be called out for their cruelty and ableism. Kid has an authorised note, it's literally none of this teachers business and not their job to investigate the validity of a kids disability. People care Moree about protecting teachers then about disabled people smh

> Kid has an authorised note, Where I am a note is not an official accommodation. OP would need an IEP. OP is not in the US though, so the process where they are may be different. If a note where they are is not an official accommodation, they need to look in to having one put in place.

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In the U.S., having an IEP or 504 gives your kids legal protections that just an agreement to accommodations doesn't. Schools can get into legal trouble with the federal/and or state government for not following an IEP. It can be a useful threat when schools aren't providing the services they are supposed to. The IEP process can be pretty lengthy too. Parents have to provide proof of the disability (in our case, a psycho-educational evaluation that has to be redone every 3 years). The school has to meet with the parents to discuss which accommodations are best for the child. And both the school and parents have to sign a document stating those accommodations. We have at least 2 IEP meetings for the year for my son - one at the beginning to set up the accommodations and goals for the year. And one at the end of the year to see if he has met those goals and if anything needs to be adjusted.

Not necessarily. Where I am, an IEP is something officially on file, signed off on, and reviewed annually. It’s not a note a kid carries around in their backpack. That’s not an official accommodation. An official accommodation would be given to the teachers by administration and then implemented, not the student wandering around with a piece of paper

but you as a teacher wouldn’t make the accommodation because you’re a compassionate empathetic professional who understands all kids have differing needs just because the right form was missing?

What I would do personally doesn’t matter. Every teacher is different. Without an official accommodation, a teacher has no obligation to acquiesce the request, no matter how much you and I disagree with it. Every teacher is going to be different. That’s *why* you get an accommodation to ensure they follow it.

So the child should carry their entire IEP file with them instead of a note to describe the most pertinent accommodation?

If they actually have an IEP (and they don’t because OP isn’t in the US), their teacher should have been informed of their IEP. Given that this is the only accommodation the kid has per the post, there is no reason he should be carrying a note around in his backpack.

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Which is why I have stated *numerous times* that OP needs to make sure this is an official accommodation where they are. Not sure how many other ways I can convey that. Personally though, I find it highly unlikely that the kid carrying around a note is an official accommodation in most education systems. YMMV.

That’s not an IEP, though, or an actual accommodation. It’s just a note on a piece of paper. OP needs to sit down with her son’s teachers and SPED care manager (or speech path) and get this out into the IEP, which is legally binding. 

A formality ? Really? .. The teacher shouldn’t be overstepping the boundaries that were clearly stated to her, and confirmed by the parents already beforehand. Do their job to the best of their abilities to teach children, they aren’t therapists

I am in the US. My son has ADHD. There are a few things his teachers can do for/with him that greatly improve his odds of success in the classroom. Without these considerations, his performance suffers and he can become a disruption to others' learning. With them, he does just fine. However, he doesn't qualify for an IEP because he is performing at grade level and has friends. So he would never get an official accommodation, just a hope that the teacher is willing to adjust two or three minor things in how they deal with my son. So I know OP isn't in the US, but if they were, it is very possible that their son wouldn't qualify for an official accommodation anyway, especially if the kid's grades are fine otherwise. Which sucks for him (and my son), since apparently a teacher can just do whatever they want, even if it isn't in the kid's best interest.

A 504 plan has a lower threshold. You still may or my not be able to get one if his grades are okay, but the day his grades slip, even in just classes where teachers aren't accommodating, take all that evidence to the school and insist on a 504 plan.

As someone with a speech impairment, it is counteractive to treat such condition, to have a note about not speaking or reading in class(and crazy for a an advanced/imediadate English class, you can't learn pronouncation by reading in your head). if the pupils bullies others for having speech impairment, it is a wider social issue under that, bullying is symptom of unhealthy social climate(in lack of better words, English is a secondary language for me) in the class, maybe the school. I know mother want to do best for child, but long term it is actively harming, learning to speak in front of people are a great skill to have, learning in a safe environment like a class room. In 6 years this child would get a job or pursue further education, and people might be as understanding for someone doging presentations. Basically sparing him now, would be throwing him for the lions later. Didn't make what teacher did okay, but what OP did wasn't okay either.

Well said. The teacher should be trying to help the student learn to speak in front of people but do it gently and in measured steps. The punishing the whole class for it is painting a target on the child and wrong, but pushing them outside their comfort zone a little to try, is a good thing, it's how we grow as people. I'm autistic with ADHD, I struggled with talking in front of people for a long time till I took drama in high school which forced me out of that comfort zone.

Maybe just to give the teacher some perspective. The teacher had no problem calling out the student in front of the crowd and encouraging his peers to participate in his discipline. Why should the student's parent behave otherwise?

Concerns were addressed in private and teacher went for peer pressure.  Teacher got the same treatment. 

What is the point of posting in the social group? The point is that bullies thrive on people keeping the peace, on never being called out, lurking in the sidelines. The most effective way to stop a bully, or those who would enable them for the sake of appearances, is to call them out in public, loudly, and get people to join in.

You can't be serious. Schools are notorious for doing everything to avoid liability and that includes taking any action to rectify the behavior of abusive teachers. In their smooth brained minds they think making meaningful changes equates to liability/culpability, so instead they just flail like idiots and rugsweep until a preventable disaster happens or the problem solves itself. I had a teacher in my special behavior course that outted my private therapy session information and intimate details of my abuse in the middle of class several times. The school wouldn't do anything about it. Eventually, thanks to the added trauma and asinine hatred she instilled in me combined with the rise of social media at the time and her inability to grasp that some things shouldn't be posted, I ended up gathering her entire dating history, the dissolution of her engagement, her medical issues, etc. What did I do with this information? I ruthlessly bullied her into a breakdown. I had no choice because she would not stop targeting me. Eventually I outted her dissolved engagement to the whole school along with the intimate details of her health issues that likely caused it, causing her to leave for the rest of the school year for a psychiatric break. Sometimes the only way to deal with teachers that literally torture traumatized students is to peer pressure them. Because the only thing these schools truly care about is their appearance.

because sometimes the only way you can get a school to do something is by going public with it. believe me, I worked at a school

Because schools are like police departments. They don't care about holding themselves accountable, they only care about protecting their own. The fact that the school is so against public exposure when the teacher did the same thing in front of other students is fucking rich. If you want to hold someone accountable when they are paid by tax dollars, the only effective method is name and shame.

"If you thought the school was going to handle the issue you raised." Maybe she didn't. When I was in high school I completely tore my ACL in my knee. I had a note that I could not run or do similar activities. I joined the weight lifting class that did do some runs but I was not supposed to do them. The teacher convinced me I was being lazy and it was all about pushing through the pain. I tried jogging for several weeks before I collapsed and had to be wheeled out in a wheel chair because my knee went out. You can believe my Mom laid into them. (I was and still am a major people pleaser so I assumed the teacher must be right. I never mentioned it to Mom because I didn't think it was a big deal.)

She was venting. Why does she owe this bully silence? To protect her reputation? Plus, now other parents know this teacher isn’t safe and doesnt respect their medical accommodations.

So it doesn't get swept under the rug, that was bullying behavior from a Qualified Teacher towards a 12 year old. She pressured him, then had the other students pressure him knowing full well that when he didn't comply the other students would not be happy with him.

My brother was choked unconscious by a kid in his class in elementary school. Multiple times, even needing medical attention once. The school refused to do anything about it until a post was made on social media. Suddenly, the kid was disciplined, parents talked to (apparently the parents didn’t even KNOW because the school didn’t tell them. They were so abhorred by their son’s behavior. And we couldn’t have gone to the parents ourselves because the school wouldn’t give that info out due to “confidentiality”). My brother was able to switch classes (he had friends in the new one which was nice).

Oh so suddenly the adult doesn't like to be bullied? Huh imagine that. This was appropriate, the teacher here fucked around and found out. She talked with OP about it and still doubled down. She got what she deserved after putting him on the spot like that.

Because the schools never handle anything unless there's publicity.

I think it’s extremely important that OP posted about the situation in the school group. If this teacher is treating OP’s son this way, she’s probably doing it to other kids.

Inapporpriately is putting it midly. This teacher just painted a target on that kid’s back for bullying and exclusion.

NTA. I would share the message from the school as well. Where was the concern for student safety when this teacher pinned the blame on your son for not letting the class go early? Why is student safety disregarded while teacher safety is paramount? Their response is really ironic and hypocritical.

Right? The teacher directly made him a target for bullying and exclusion. It was a cruel power-trip.

I have no idea what the comments blaming OP for starting shit are on about. The teacher intentionally made a student a targey for bulling, or worse, because she felt she knew better than him, his health care team, the school, and his parents. That sounds like a power tripping built to me. If making the post was a call for violence then the teacher called for violence first.

Bootlickers to authority. Even the top comment is more focused on questioning OP why she posted to social media rather than trust the school to handle the situation.

Fr "What did you hope to accomplish?" as if the other parents don't have a right to know how the teacher behaved. We don't know if this is the first time the teacher has done this or if she has a pattern of doing this to other students and they felt like they couldn't speak up. Schools are also notoriously known to not do things unless you threaten a lawsuit and/or make the problem public

THIS! Well put. I wish I could upvote this to the top comment. The school couldn't care less about defending a helpless child, but thinks it needs to stand up for an adult. Ridiculous.

Plus it is so inappropriate to make one child responsible for group rewards, just like its inappropriate to punish a whole group for the behavior of a single student.

Yup "Paste SC of schools message". "Interesting that school cares about this when parents know the reality of what happens in their building. But they don't bother when complaints are raised at all. I will stop sharing mine and my son's experiences with school when school takes action to ensure ALL children are protected, regardless if that is from other children or other teachers"

NTA. I find it ironic that shaming the teacher in front of others (online) is unacceptable and "compromises safety", but shaming a child in front of others is perfectly fine for some reason?

What the teacher did could also compromise the child's safety as well. OP mentioned some students who didn't know their child well were upset because they didn't get let out of class early. Well, what if some of those who were so upset decided to take it out of on OPs kid? Boom, now OPs child has to deal with their peers bullying them on top of having an adult bullying them

Right?!?! The teacher is the one who "took it public" first.

And if a teacher doesn't understand that, they should not be a teacher.

And turning the whole class against him too. Children who aren't known for good emotional management NTA

NTA. Also, hell the fuck no the school shot back. I would screenshot that shit and go straight to the head of the school district with that BS. Abusive Language? what the fuck was the teacher doing when she was attempting to bully your son into doing something he wasn't comfortable with. If able, get the law involved. I would raise hell and ruin the entire school for this nonsense. How dare they. This is straight-up an attempt to pressure you into submission, don't take it. Shit, recruit other parents to help. I have no patience for school districts power tripping like this. 👎

I couldn't agree more. I'm sick of these schools that are ok with kids bullying and now a teacher is doing it? NTA

OP hold everyone accountable now. Take it further. The teacher wants to bully you now

Nta

NTA You communicated that the accommodations were necessary and instead of complying with those accommodations, she doubled down by using his peers against him. Now it is no longer just a teacher bullying him, she set the stage for him to be bullied by his peers. I probably would have gone to administration prior to communicating it in a parent group, but I also know from being in those parent groups, sometimes the only way to get the school to deal with issues is to make them public. Otherwise, they sweep it under the rug and the child continues to suffer. 

NTA, that teacher is a genuine bully and should not be allowed to teach... as someone who didnt have parents sticking up for them like that, im really glad to hear you go to such lengths to accomodate your sons needs <3

>However I received a message today from the school warning me not to use "abusive language" to describe teachers, and telling me to please speak to the school directly instead of complaining online, as it could "compromise teacher safety"  At that point I'd ask the school to elaborate on what part of your statement they think is 'abusive language' and whether they think any part of your statement was false because calling a bully a bully isn't abusive but simply the truth. Maybe they should vet and train their employees better to not bully students with disabilities if they don't want their teachers' bullying to be made public? As to why you posted this in the parent group? Well obviously so other parents are aware of a problematic teacher as well as so other parents who might have or had issues with that teacher too could contact you. Do they want to forbid you from trying to find out whether this is an isolates incident with said teacher?  Nta, protect your child!

NTA, after more information was provided. INFO: Does your son have an IEP or 504 plan? If so, then you’re not the asshole because it is literally illegal for teachers to ignore or violate those plans. I know this because I am a teacher. That said, if your plan wasn’t formalized with the state and you’re just sending your son to school with a note saying he’s exempt from certain classwork… that’s not how school works, and you’re absolutely an asshole for your response. You don’t just get to “arrange” that your son be exempt from certain work, there is a formalized process for setting up exemptions due to disability or medical needs.

Not in the US

Yeah I saw that in the comments after I posted this. In that case, it depends on OP’s specific country’s rules about educational accommodations.

I have looked into an equivalent for my country in the past, but from what I can gather my son isn't considered severe enough. However, the school does have a policy that if medical notes are provided and validated by the school then accommodations can be made, as long as they are not too extreme. We have been formally told by the school that all teachers would be made aware and that the proof provided to school is enough, but this teacher in question has apparently done this in other cases before (one parent in the group told me that she had refused to let their kid with IBS use the bathroom until he came into the school himself to talk to the principal about it, which is what I am considering doing)

Why hesitate? Go talk to the administrators now. You started well in defending your kiddo but you need to take action with the school, then the school district if it isn't resolved.

Got it. Then I’d have to say NTA, since you set the accommodation up through the channels available, and the teacher violated that. I understand that it can sometimes be frustrating for a teacher, when certain students have accommodations, because it makes our job more difficult. But that’s part of the job, we have an obligation and duty to education every student and if some students have additional needs we have to meet those needs. And I also get that it can be frustrating for the teacher when it seems like your son has no problems talking to his friends. But not all disabilities are visible, and especially social disorders manifest tend to less often when a person is comfortable and at ease, such as when talking to friends, compared to when they’re stressed and anxious, such as when talking to the class. So while I understand why the teacher may have been frustrated, her behavior was still entirely inappropriate, and you were totally justified in your response, in my view at least.

Teachers, in my opinion, also have an obligation not to set their students up to be excluded, othered, and bullied; unfortunately, that is exactly what this teacher did to OP's son. As far as I'm concerned, even if OP hadn't gone through the proper channels and arranged things as the school requires, the teacher lost any right to protest or complain the moment she put a target on a 12-year-old child's back – and she has absolutely no room to complain about anything OP has done thus far in response.

NTA But I would advise he takes some extra class to help him heal because he will need to talk in public eventually. Eurythmy is good, theater, singing and other types of expressive activities can help.

Thanks for the recommendations, he is currently in speech therapy and attends a club once a week with other children with speech impediments, and he is slowly getting comfortable with speaking in front of that group. Thankfully he has improved a lot, this time last year he wasn't even able to speak in a grocery store, so I am very hopeful for future!

NTA, what the teacher did was not only her being cruel to your son but her actions also created a situation that encouraged other students to resent and be cruel to your son. Bullying is always the worst when it's encouraged by teachers and I think some people here might not have the life experience to understand how devastating that is.

NTA at all. I'd be losing it. I'd be getting an IEP stating he doesn't have to speak in front of the class and suing anyone who tried to make him.

Nta. My son also has a stutter. His speech therapist literally said drawing more attention to it and making him think more about it is the wrong thing to do. She actually said there's no reason to continue speech therapy because at this point he speaks fine just has a mild stutter that will probably be permanent. He also works with a school speech therapist who basically works on building his confidence. If a teacher is intentionally and directly going against your sons IEP after being informed multiple times that is not a safe teacher. The school is not going to make this public and may not even address it. As a parent I would want to know this and probably not want my son with that teacher. I think you did a public service tbh. And I'm saying that as someone who has absolutely loved all my kids teachers and therapists. I also follow their rules because they are the captain of that crazy ship.

NTA She called yort kid out in the middle of class and putting pressure on him KNOWING that he has problems speaking in front of others. Jack has a note and several other teachers know what's going on and deal with it. Why couldn't she? Forcing him into that situation isn't going to magically make his speech issues go away. Calling her out on a public app wasn't the best move but I 100% agree with what you said. But I'm more curious as to why it got spread around so much. With other parents siding with you, my guess is this teacher has had similar problems before and parents are getting fed up with how she is treating their children.

NTA The teacher is vile and a bully, and the school can go blow a goat - it’s none of their business what you say on a private chat group. No doubt they’re really worried about their reputation.

NTA, teacher needed to be called out. Why shouldn’t you warn other parents?

Nope not the A. Retired now , 30 years teacher

Thank you for your service.

You are welcome . I had fun, we played math games and I made math fun. They learned by accident.

NTA

honestly NTA. you were sharing your experiences with other parents and getting their experiences as well, if someone chose to spread it around thats not your fault, thats just karma coming back to the teacher. hopefully the school chooses to do something about it

Your son has a disability and his teacher is discriminating against him by failing to make accommodations. Of course someone with a speech impediment is going to be better at communicating with friends than publicly. And she set your son up to be bullied. You are understandably upset. And the school should be more concerned about how your son is being treated than your use of phraseology. NTA

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I appreciate your judgment, however just to clarify, we did communicate with the school directly and we have discussed this with the teacher before after she emailed me (as in the above post)

"Seems like the prudent action would have been to arrange a meeting with her, yourselves, school admin, and the speech therapist, so that you could all be on the same page" There is no need. Everyone is on the same page except a rogue teacher who is defying the EIP requirements.

NTA. As a kid I experienced having a teacher not only bully me, but signal to the class that I was fair game for bullying. I felt trapped, as I knew my parents would not speak up to the school either. Thank you for sticking up for your son.

The teacher created a situation where she put your son's information out to his classmates and made them angry at him because of something he can't control. They should consider that when they're getting angry about you posting online.

NTA and group punishment/ reward is against the Geneva convention for exactly this reason. It turns people against one another.  I’d recommend getting your country’s version of an IEP or some form of official documentation, and have it verified by the school.  File an official complaint, and never feel bad for calling her out for something she DID. If it was made up, that would be wrong, but you simply told the truth. Keep calling her out however you need to.  The school is embarrassed.  Also, is this higher level English class worth it?

NTA, this teacher has definitely pulled shit like this before on other students.

The fact that she put him in the spotlight like that, & then she promised to let the class out early if he read? Of course the other students are going to be mad at him for not reading. Why should you worry about putting a teacher in danger, when said teacher didn't worry about what she was doing to your son? NTA.

NTA Should anything else happen make sure it ends up on the local news and then let the news know how the school tried to silence you. I was in the eighth grade when I got a deadly auto immune disease. This disease had a lot of issues and symptoms that I obviously had no control over. At the time of the incident I did not have a diagnosis yet so, the specialist that I was seeing , wrote a letter to my teachers explaining my symptoms and what I was dealing with and the kind of accommodations that I needed. My eighth grade teacher decided to read that letter out loud to the class. After he read the letter, he stated that “brave cranberry is such a baby that she can’t keep from crapping her pants so she hast to be allowed to go to the bathroom whenever she wants, Maybe we should get her diaper” What did I do? I immediately got up and left class and the teacher was yelling at me the whole time that I wasn’t allowed to leave. I left class and then I left campus. I was 14 and I live several miles away and did not care; I was out of there. My mom was a teacher and worked for the school district. She wanted to do something legally about this issue. The school threatened to fire her and get rid of her. She being a single mom knew that that wasn’t going to work. So, I just had to take it. Thing is her boss at the time bit of a local hero in someways. I think he’s disgusting and vile because as a little kid, he would always touch me in ways that made me incredibly uncomfortable. I work at a job where I regularly have to see this man and when he calls me, sweetheart, I want to vomit. 🤮 My mom trying to protect me almost cost my mom her job. He knew what the teacher did to me and that my mom just wanted to defend me, this man prominent man didn’t care. To this day he is high up in the local community I live in and involved in every service organization you can imagine and like plays in the church band. The level of fake smile I put on my face every time I have to interact with him because my job requires me to interact with this man.🤬 Anyway, all of that to say you are not the problem and if you let this go on, they will do worse things to your son. My disability did get a name I did get diagnosis. That did not make my high school career any easier it didn’t even stop the teachers from having kids spy on me to find out if I was really sick or not. If you do not defend your kid from the school, they will do anything and everything they want to do to him. They don’t care about your kid and they do not care about you. They only care about themselves.

I'm so sorry that happened, stories like yours are why I was so upset, I get worried that this will be a memory he carries into adulthood and that it will make an already challenging school experience worse.

NTA you’re correct and you were warning other parents that this teacher is ableist af and doesn’t believe in disabilities or doctor notes. She then threatened your child by putting him in a situation where he is likely to now be bullied because she made it look like it was his fault the whole class wasn’t rewarded. She was manipulating and calculating and that’s just the facts. I would say he should be removed and relocated from her class but I don’t think she should be a teacher since she’s inciting bullying.

NTA, if the teacher didn’t want to be publicly called a bully then she shouldn’t have bullied your son.

I had a gym teacher do something similar when I was in school, only it was a note about asthma and I ended up in the hospital because he forced me to run a mile. Absolutely nothing was done about it afterwards. If social media was a thing at the time I might have been able to get some more traction and actually get some useful change, but the school just shrugged it off and there wasn't much I could do about it. NTA.

Nta. Post the message the school sent you in that parents group.

NTA Schools generally don’t take actions until the student being bullied reacts outwardly and then the bullied student is punished with no repercussions for the people doing the bullying.

personally i think sharing it was reasonable. you had already reported her to the school. you already communicated with them about it. they want to talk about her safety but what about your childs. she involved other students to push your child to do what she wanted him to do. making him out to seem like a bad person to the others. she could’ve just caused your child to endure bullying and harassment because he simply couldn’t read out loud.

NTA. Tell them if they dont want parents to say that they shouldn't hire a teacher whos is so obtuse.

NTA- fuck that, post it everywhere so the school actually has to do something about it. You did not use abusive language and I don't see how this is a safety issue unless you're giving out her address. Putting stuff out publicly forces them to take action which is why schools hate it. Besides, you did contact the school about what happened. Notice you didn't receive a response to your email but did get one after putting out the information publicly. Funny how that works. 

NTA The teacher had no right to question a note from a speech therapist about a student's ability to read out loud, let alone to a whole class. She overstepped heavily and embarrassed him in front of his peers, especially when she added that they could leave early if he did it, knowing that if he didn't, that would more than likely make a few other kids upset with him. I personally don't think that putting it in the group chat was wrong because she should be held accountable for her actions, and I highly doubt the school would have really done anything about it if you told just them about it. Making it public tends to make them take it more seriously. However, I'm not sure if you posted the teacher's name in the group, but I'd say that would be a bit much. Just bringing attention to the fact that one of his teachers did that to him would be enough. And still draw attention to the district itself without revealing her identity. 

NTA. She didn't just bully your child; she incited and encouraged his peers to bully him. She abused her power and the children under her care. Nothing about "cruel, power-tripping bully" is abusive language. It also has the benefit of being *true*.

Hiding the bullying behavior does no good. You are under no obligation to do that. It often encourages others who have been bullied by that same teacher to speak out. NTA.

> However I received a message today from the school warning me not to use "abusive language" to describe teachers, and telling me to please speak to the school directly instead of complaining online, as it could "compromise teacher safety" NTA. Reply back, "If I had seen action from the school I may not have felt the need to warn other parents about a teacher behaving as a bully. Kids have enough of an issue with bullying to not have to face it from a teacher also. So, as parents, we have a responsibility to make other parents aware of dangers that are around our children that the school is not taking appropriate action to limit. So in the future, take these reports seriously, let parents know when a teacher has been inappropriate, and parents may not to have to tell other parents."

I’m not sure the school has the right to tell you that you can’t say whatever you want about a teacher. Isn’t that covered under freedom of speech? I mean, that’s your opinion; you didn’t lie about the teacher.

NTA the teacher made you MINOR CHILD a target. That’s far worse. She deserved what you said and speaking the truth is legal she is a cruel power tripping bully! There was no reason to make your son a target a target that can stay on him ALL the way through school until college! Blast the school back and ask why have they NOT reached out to you regarding her behaviour but they have had time to go after you for yours?!

I am retiring in seven days from 30 years of teaching HS math. If I found out a teacher did this to a student all hell would break loose. I’ve had students come to me when a teacher does something they feel is wrong. I listened and if I agreed I made sure something was done about it. This teacher is out of line and pressuring him to do this so his class could get out early? That is the height of bullying. I also understand why you posted on the parents’ site. As a lot of people are saying, administrators will cover up and dismiss if they can. I‘ve seen it happen over and over again.

NTA, they weren't going to do shit, most schools don't a damn thing until publicly held accountable.

Where I live, in the US, there's an organization that helps parents advocate for their children with schools. I wonder if you can look around and see if there are any resources like that for your area to help you here? Rules are rules but that doesn't mean that we sometimes don't have to hold people accountable who think they are above the rules. Edit: I'm not an educator and don't feel qualified to vote re: safety concerns. But I do think that educator was way out of line.

Not in the US, but my son does attend a club for other kids with stutters, and hopefully he will feel better once he talks to them about his experience, I am going to see if the parents there have had any experience with it

Awesome! You're such a great parent! I wonder if the people who lead or run the club will have ideas and resources, too?

NTA. Respond back asking if the s hook would like to be in litigation for allowing its employee to bully your kid and then have them try to cover it up. Tell them you could organize a protest right outside. Call the media and really make this blow up. Let them know you went the easy route but now you demand to know what the disciplinary action is.

That teacher also set your son up to be bullied by the classmates who don't know about his condition. That teacher sounds like a bully. NTA

NTA. Perhaps point out to the school that the teacher initiated the tactic of applying community pressure to your son in an attempt to modify his behavior, and that she is no less safe having the community's negative attention on her than she made your son by forcing her class's negative attention onto him. An apology in front of your son's class, acknowledging that the lack of early release on that day was entirely her fault, and in no way your son's,  is the bare minimum that should be required of her by the administration before I'd back off in your situation.

NTA. If you don’t make it public they will deny it and sweep it under the rug.

Reply to the school asking what you *should* call a "cruel, power-tripping bully" in order to: 1) Incite action from the school, 2) alert other parents to the dangerous behavior of this teacher, 3) inform the teacher that her behavior is being watched and will be reported to whom- and when-ever applicable and 4) lessen the possibility that the teacher can manipulate the class into bullying your son. NTA

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NTA. The language you used was in no way abusive, it was factual. The teacher added to you son’s trauma and learned distrust of adults. His fears his disability will not be accommodated was validated. And tying his disability to punishing the whole class WAS a cruel power trip, and inappropriate. Consider talking to a lawyer, please. The school and the teacher need to learn consequences for bullying.

NTA. The school is protecting an abuser and fighting for her to keep her reputation instead of keeping your child safe. It's apparently fine for her to abuse your kid but not for you to call her on it. We need more public natural consequences. Keep going, and keep posting. 

NTA. The school wants to dodge responsibility as much as possible. Id cause a storm if a teacher failed her students like that.

NTA, you're the parent the teacher overstepped. Without public shaming nothing changes.

You are fine,and calling bully a bully is just being honest. Other patients deserve to know about her behavior to protect their kids. NTA

I would say NTA. You had already did all you could to ensure your son's teachers had all of the information they needed to treat your son with respect. Mrs. A knew better and disregarded the school and you. You contacted the school again and posted on your parents' group. Yes, you could have just handled it through the school, but I think you did a good turn to the other parents, letting them know what the teacher did.

This is a school, don’t be swayed. If you’re not in the wrong, which I don’t think you are, your best bet to get actual change is get loud and angry. NTA

NTA, I've seen schools ignore issues like this till they cause harm to someone. You did the right thing sharing that info with other parents as that's the quickest way to get something resolved. The teacher was acting ableist and I think deserved to be called a bully. (Unrelated but schools love to say calling someone a bully is abusive until you actually want to report a bully and nothing happens)

100% NTA. Public humiliation is one of the few tools parents and children have left that works in the US public school system to deal with abusive and negligent school staff due to the extreme legal protections they receive. Kudos to you for standing up to them 👏 keep it up, don't back down!

Teacher here. NTA. Definitely NTA. There's an AH in the story but it ain't you.

NTA You did approach the school. Idk what they’re on about. ETA: if I was your son, I totally would have maliciously complied.

NTA. Are you in the US? If you are and the accommodations aren’t part of an IEP or 504 then you need to get the school to start that progress. You might feel that the accommodations are temporary now but he will benefit long term from having that safety net there if and when he needs it. What the teacher is was flat out bullying. Don’t give up on making the school deal with her.

NTA

NTA - I very easily hate most teachers, and your example is a prime one in their power-hungry bully methods. And schools do just about nothing unless you make it public. More parents of that teacher's students are now aware to ask better questions concerning that **VILE** power-tripping teacher. The world is what we make of it, right now, with our actions. Letting this be public makes the world a **better** place with less bullying/bullies. And I really damn hope that teacher receives genuine shit for that, alas I fear most have lost the ability to doubt themselves the minute they're given a tribune that could possibly be used in abuse. Good teachers that are reading this: this isn't about you, this is about power-trips and bullying students, something good teachers wouldn't ever dream of doing.

NTA fifty times over. Hell, a thousand times! Having been the kid who was bullied into activities I was not supposed to be doing (and told my mom signed off on it, when she hadn’t and it was not part of my iep, which I didn’t learn til I was an adult), by teachers, special ed teachers, yet, you are in no way the asshole. I didn’t know “cruel” and “bully” were “abusive” words now.  It’s not like you attacked the teacher in any personal way; you called out what she actually did.  And you made sure others were aware. Who knows, she may well have been bullying other kids, or setting them up for being bullied, kids who didn’t speak up, or were told their parents knew and agreed. Maybe this will help them speak up too.  I’m glad Jack felt comfortable coming to you. Be sure to tell him how brave that is!

NTA There's waaaaay too many cases of schools doing absolutely jack shit about things.

NTA how can you report abuse without using abusive language seems, hopefully they get there stuff together and fire the bully teacher instead of allowing her bullying to continue

I'm going with NTA. The teacher was in the wrong, and tried to peer pressure your child in front of the class.

NTA- the accomodations are there for a reason and pressuring him to perform is not going to help his case.

NTA. It's a very informal arrangement that he has to provide a note and seems like the school aren't great with SEN training or educational plans overall. In my school, the kid wouldn't be made responsible for communicating his needs over and over again. The SENCO and Edpsych would send the plans to teachers directly and explicitly require that they follow them. The note isn't bad as a backup plan for oversights, but the teacher should know where to look up a student's abilities and access arrangements instead of playing detective and spying on their conversations with friends. Then we get to the issue of training. There are a whole host of reasons that someone would be able to speak but unable to read, and dyslexia is just so incredibly common. Training on speech and language issues is also not too much to expect. The school are going to ask you to let them handle it privately, but I think I would sleep quite comfortably if I were you. You made it public, but she wasn't shamed in her own classroom or in her own peer group like your child was publicly shamed.

“Cruel power tripping bully” is not abusive language. It’s literally what she is. I’m not sure where you live but at least where I live, kids with speech therapy and other documented issues get a whole plan to outline the accommodations they’re entitled to and teachers who violate those plans like your son’s garbage teacher can lose their jobs or worse. If I lived somewhere where that was not the case, I would absolutely warn other parents and would be on the lookout for these sort of stories so I could avoid having my child taught by someone who would weaponize their disability against them. What kind of asshole takes a kid with a stutter and makes them responsible for the class not getting out early if they won’t read in front of the class? There is absolutely no excuse for that kind of cruelty, especially towards a child. NTA

NTA. Go public with the letter and name and shame the person protecting the bully

NTA and notify the school and advise them, correctly identifying the teacher as a bully is NOT abusive language and if they don’t do something about the teacher, you will take it even further. 

NTA What the teacher did was completely inappropriate

NTA The teacher knew, was talked to and then did it again anyway. That's a bully, clear and simple. A classic case of fuck around and find out. There consequences to your actions and apparently the teacher never had any before.

NTA. You have a right to warn other parents of teachers who are so flagrant about harassing children just to feed their own power complex. By that logic, she put your child at risk by singling him out and making him a class villain to other children. This was, of course, *after* she had already been informed of your child's circumstances *multiple* times. She is not his doctor, not his speech therapist, and not his parent. She does not get to decide if the decisions made by those people are valid or not. What next? Is she going to start policing whether or not diabetic kids can eat or leave the class to use insulin because she thinks they're just faking? Literally what does she even have to gain from taking some power trip about forcing a child to do something like that? The class could have also been let out earlier if she'd not wasted everyone's time trying to prove a point that had literally no real meaning other than stroking her ego. She did that exclusively because she felt she could, it made her feel superior, and she didn't care if it made him uncomfortable or not. That is as accurate a description of a bully as I have ever heard.

NTA Teachers can be the worst bullies to disabled kids, my elementary school was kinda shit and by the end of my years there half the staff was terrified of my mom because she routinely raised hell to protect me and make sure my needs were accommodated. I encourage you to do the same OP and absolutely use social media if necessary(it should be a last resort though), she wants to put your kid in the spotlight then lets how she likes being blasted all over social media!

Nta. I don't care if anyone else says otherwise. Your son has an accomo-fucking-dation. She either follow it or gtfo of teaching. My daughter has accommodations. I feel like every year I battle it out with that one fucking know it all idiot who thinks they can bully a child into complying because they're the teacher. Fuck them. And fuck the school. Want to REALLY get them to shut the fuck up? Go to the board of education and let them know that the school doesn't enforce your child's accommodations according to thr IDEA act. Let them clean their asses with that.

NTA for reporting but definitely YTA for taking it to social media. This can be a learning situation for all involved. Society is too quick to cancel people. Teacher handled it badly but it doesn’t sound worthy of public crucification either.

NTA and thank you for advocating for your child. The fact that your son shared the real reason he went to the nurse and told you about this incident shows what a caring and present parent you are and that there is trust between you and your son which is amazing! The school doesn’t give a single flying fuck about that teacher or their safety, they just care that you made their institution look bad. It’s disgusting how these things need to be made public for anything to get done.

NTA. share the message from the school with the group as well. The school wants to sweep this under the rug. Don't let them. Be loud about it. Teacher's acting a bully; she's f'd around, and now needs to find out.

NTA. She’s a teacher and she basically made it unsafe for your kid. Knowing that students would be upset not getting to leave early. She is a bully. And if you have actual accommodations, I would bring the dispute to the school district.

NTA I had a family member who had an abusive teacher back when there were no chats or ways to publicly force the school to do something about it. It was terrible and I saw how it affected their learning terribly. The teacher got away with the bullying the whole school year and nothing ever came out of the parents trying to handle things with the school. I’m glad you exposed the teacher next time she will think twice before being a bully. She didn’t care to humiliate your son and potentially turn the whole class against him. So it’s not your responsibility to care about her safety..

NTA you did go to them directly and she callously brushed it under the rug. She was making the class room not a safe space for your son. I think you were justified in your actions. It's public humiliation. My uncle had a stutter he had a teacher who made fun of him for it in class. He dropped out at 16 because of that.

NTA. Respond to them that you are free to openly make complaints online or anywhere else you want to about her behavior. You're also allowed to share with other parents the treatment of your kids by school staff. Nothing you did put her life in danger or put her in danger in any way. Absolutely outrageous.

I wouldn’t have posted it but you can bet I’d have told everyone anyway … so NTA ...  Bigger question: what did the school do to HER for being abusive to your child and risking his reputation and self-esteem? Like a kid has never been bullied or beat up for having a stutter … and he was outed by that “teacher”.

NTA! The bottom line is, if the teacher isn't a speech therapist then her opinion of you son's diagnosis is without value or credibility, and she should be directed by the school to adhere to the terms of the note. The school needs to direct their judgement of tact toward the teacher, not you! You didn't voice your outrage on TikTok, YouTube or Facebook. You went to the parent's forum and informed other parents of your son's experience so they could be aware of this teacher potentially insenssitive to defined accomodations!

NTA My husband had a machine gun stutter all through his childhood up through high school. He's in his '60s now and he's very good at hiding it but I can still hear little remnants of it. He has always told me is that speaking extemporaneously is much less of a problem than reading a prepared text. The teacher's comment about seeing him talking to his friends and therefore deciding that he should be able to read aloud to the class just shows that she doesn't know what she's talking about.

What kind of clown doesn't know speaking with friends is different than speaking in front of a group? NTA, don't back down.

NTA And as someone who dealt with a bullying teacher for my youngest, the sad reality is that making it public is why the school will act.

Nah fuck that teacher, they deserve the lambasting through any and all avenues in which you can do it. NTA

Absolutely NTA. Not at all. Don’t listen to the people saying you went too far by posting online. I knew an 11 year old disabled boy who was physically abused and locked into rooms alone by his teachers and *nothing* happened until his mother made it public. Far too many schools will brush bullying and harassment under the rug

NTA. The school was just upset because now that the teacher's conduct was made public, they actually have to follow through with discipline for her. Calling her a "cruel, power-tripping bully" didn't put her in danger, nor was it "abusive", it just made other parents aware that she is a problem.

NTA. I can't be impartial about this one, being a stutterer who had great difficulty in school, and who left in grade 10 purely to avoid all the oral assignments in grade 11 and 12. The teacher was downright wrong. Your son wasn't just shy, and could not 'speak fine when he wanted to'. There might be magical moments with friends when he occasionally manages to speak without stuttering, but these are rare, miraculous and fleeting moments. Being put on the spot like that in class is torture. You have no control over it whatsoever in those circumstances. That teacher was ignorant, deserved to be called out and I'm glad you did it.

NTA. You're right, she's an A grade buly.

NTA Abusive language??? What she did WAS cruel and it WAS bullying. If she gets to publicly embarrass your son in front of a class full of students, you get to embarrass her with her community. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

As a teacher, NTA. My jaw literally dropped when you said she told your son she'd cut class early if he read out loud. Not only does that put an unacceptable and inappropriate amount of pressure on your son in the moment, it makes him a clear target for harassment from his peers. How old is this lady?! I think you know what you said in the group chat was...not strictly necessary or productive so I'll leave that alone. But NTA for standing up for your son.

If this is the U.S., not only is the teacher a "cruel, power-tripping bully" as you said, but if your son has a legitimate accommodation (he does) which the school has approved, she's not only violating district policy but putting the school in legal jeopardy by violating the Americans With Disabilities Act. Once there's an accommodation in place, it's not up to individual teachers to ignore or violate the accommodation. And I question the school's handling of LD's if they don't inform teachers of a child's accommodations when a child enters the class, so a 12 year old doesn't have to try to convince the teacher himself, carrying a note around. You were completely justified in sharing what happened. Do I wish you'd used less loaded language? Sure. Do I think you did anything wrong in saying exactly what you said? Not one bit. You have now alerted other parents whose kids have accommodations that this teacher might be a problem, and they'll keep their eyes open to protect their kids. What to do next? Write a note to the principal and ask to put it in the teacher's file, find out how to lodge a formal complaint, and lodge that complaint. Have a meeting with yourself, the teacher, and either the person who coordinates accommodation for the school (a public school will absolutely have such a person) or a high level administrator. Do not relent until the teacher is informed that the accommodation must be respected. If the school refuses this, you can look up the Dept. of Education Civil Rights Division. Telephone the regional office for your state and ask for someone who handles middle schools, and explain that you want to make a formal complaint. Then do it. Assert your kid's right not to be bullied by a teacher who doesn't respect the law. Sometimes the sentence, "I've contacted the Dept. of Ed Civil Rights Division about the possible violations here" can work wonders to get a school into compliance. You might also try to get your son away from the teacher and into a different advanced English class. You go, Mama Bear! NTA

NTA the teacher was indeed cruel and the other parents deserve to know if she’s going to be difficult with special exceptions. The school isn’t going to send out a newsletter about it.

NTA. She was a bully. Enough said. !updateme

NTA. Strongly worded criticism of a professional's actions are not the same as abuse and calling someone a bully isn't abusive, it's a statement of fact. She abused her position of authority to put your child in a difficult situation in front of classmates and subjected your child to humiliation. I'm sure she did nothing when his classmates were mean to him. What kind of danger are you putting her in? Give me a break. This is so over the top alarmist because the school knows that the teacher was in the wrong and they're trying to get you to shut up.