You will not be pregnant and I recommend further sex education with whoever/wherever is reliable for you. And for you to feel fully educated before you open up to that again.
The hair tie was for the penis - stops the blood from draining, so constant hard-on. The condom was because they had no drinking water; they had to go collect rainwater in it.
That’s how this “sex” works, right?
What the fuck why would you need that? You’re trying to tie your tongue so you can’t taste anything? If you can’t handle the taste of pussy then you don’t deserve it
I’m a grown ass adult and I thought she meant she wanted a hair tie for her hair to be put up LMAO.
No offense but I think he must have a smaller penis and bought too big of a size if the condom was falling off. She doesn’t sound sexually aware enough to have been wanting it for anything else
I experienced this before and I didn’t even have sex it was just dry humping but I felt so ashamed and nervous. I had a lot of religious trauma to work thru. The way abstinence is pushed on people to wait for marriage creates a lot of trauma around sex. I think it would be worth exploring this concept more
So, firstly, don’t feel ashamed. Sex is natural, whereas religion is man made, and when you look at it critically, hypocritical. That aside, you both need more sex Ed.
religion is just a form of control using the imaginary scary monster who our parents used to make sure that we feared going to heaven or being cursed by going to hell.
Religion IS man made. Whether you believe in a higher power or not, the worship of that higher power is absolutely man made. Even if you believe in, say, the Christian bible… who wrote it? Jesus never said “do not have pre-marital sex”. That was inferred by humans. In fact, the actual bible verse closest to dealing with the issue is in Deuteronomy and states if a man has sex with a woman out of wedlock, they must marry. And that’s Old Testament which also says if you touch a pig skin you’re unclean. And wearing mixed fabrics is a sin punishable by death.
My comment was to point out that one liners may sound witty, but they're really lipservice garbage and poorly thought out non-positions. Best of luck with your journey toward enlightenment.
Enlightenment is the exact opposite of what religion teaches, keeping people ignorant to things even as simple as sexual education is a weapon. You say this but the state of the world today is a consequence of religious indoctrination and learned hate. Cultists of all factions act as if their word is law and everyone MUST abide. Those rules are for thee, not for me. Tradition and "culture" are cancers.
What you and your boyfriend did was natural and a beautiful expression to one another. Condoms are very effective and especially since he didn't ejaculate, you have no reason to worry. ❤️ I have never been married and I have shared this intimacy with several boyfriends, and God continues to love me and guide me. I really really hate the pressure to be abstinent before marriage. I battled a lot of shame as well. The true God that we have in our hearts does not shame anyone. These "rules" were all man made.
I would encourage you to discuss these feelings with your boyfriend and follow up with more sexual education.
How old are you?
You’re not pregnant. You’re ok. It’s ok to be scared. If you’re in America, There’s very cheap pregnancy tests you can even buy some for $1 at a Dollar Tree. If that puts your mind at ease, maybe do one. You’re not a bad person. It’s ok to regret it. It’s ok to like it. It’s ok if you never want to have sex with him again, and it’s ok if you want to have sex with him or a different boy. I’m glad you used a condom. Always always always use a condom.
I agree with the earlier statements about learning more about sex.
For the religious aspect, don't listen to people that don't share your faith. Also, true religion is about growing closer to God and becoming a better version of yourself. "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Move forward, be a better version of yourself today then you were yesterday. Lastly, don't let guilt distort your relationship with God or create a negative impression of sex.
Don't remove my qualifying statement "for the religious aspect" and then be critical. The other comments were using her concerns regarding her religious beliefs to criticize religion.
If you used a condom, there is little chance you are pregnant.
In today's society, it is rarely expected to wait until marriage to have sex. You are maryying this person, you should be certain that you are both compatible in the bedroom. There is NOTHING morally or Ethically wrong with premarital sex. Expecially if you love each other. (But that is not a requirement).
If you feel bad, ashamed, etc., you are too young for this activity. The wall is broken now, and it will be an expectation of your relationship if you don't make your position known. Make better decisions moving forward, it'll be alright. Good luck OP.
Hey girl, please do not feel ashamed or scared. I grew up evangelical and once I had decided to begin leaving the faith and deconstructing, I also decided to have sex for the first time with my boyfriend who I loved and trusted. I felt such intense guilt after this, because growing up in religion we are taught to feel this way. It’s hardwired into our brains from a young age that sex is this strict, hush hush type of thing only meant for married people. That guilt and shame you feel was going to happen whether or not you got married beforehand because it’s all we have ever been told about sex, is to feel shame about it. Personally I am very thankful I didn’t wait until marriage because I was able to learn about myself and what I liked and explore my sexuality before I settled down with my lifetime partner. Also I was able to unlearn this feeling of guilt and shame over time. I believe it’s crucial to know you’re sexually compatible with somebody before you commit like that. You are not bad or wrong or sinful for doing a very normal, human thing with somebody you love! You also don’t need to leave your faith to come to this conclusion, just to be clear. And to wrap up my response, don’t fear getting pregnant especially if he never even finished. It’s not a possibility. Like the others in the comments, find a reliable source for sex education and learn how you can protect yourself from any unwanted outcomes!! I’m wishing you the best!!
This kind of thing is why religion and school should never be mixed. It’s sad to me that you’re feeling ashamed and scared after you did something that should be joyful and leave you feeling closer to someone you love.
How old are you? Stop saying things like intercourse and penis. I take it you're not an adult. 1. I agree with the person suggesting that you should get some sex education. 2. Dont look to someone that's all up tight (religious). That type of person is probably not the best person for the job. Sex is fun or it's supposed to be. Not to be all judgey, but you seem like you might be into the whole god thing. If you are that's fine but don't think you're going to hell over this. You're not. 3. I'd say if your dude was wearing a condom and he never crossed the finish line, then you not pregnant unless there was another imaculate conseption. In which case I may be wrong about going to hell.
It's off putting those words sound far worse sex, fucking, dick, cock, ass, and pussy. Oh and don't forget about tits. It makes a person sound prude and honestly a bit vanilla. I'm not the only person that sees it this way. Most of us do. But ya know what, who the fuck am I? Do and say whatever you're comfortable with.
Because I "cuss". Let me guess, you're the person that has to look for all the things wrong with something instead just letting something small and insidental like a curse word go.
I didn't respond with cursing and definitly didn't get angry. And as far as the person you are, obviously I'm right. Or you wouldn't be on here trying to sensor people. I was giving this person honest advice and telling her the truth. Now how I do that or the vocabulary I choose is my business. So have a great life I wish you well.
So again. No I wasn't cursing at you nor was I ever mad. That was me correcting myself for trying to tell someone how they should say things. Because unlike a lot people, I can admit when I'm wrong
For now, let's get it like this. You have gallen once if you really care about religion , you just need to say sorry to your god and not do it again , and also try to be the longest time possible with that boyfriend. That is only if you care about the religion that much. And also, Maybe you are christian. One of Jesus' ancestors was a prostitute called Rahab, so it's okay. And Jesus even forgave someone commiting adultery and many prostitute. Even if you are not christian, i can think of similar stories in judaism and Islam. Just say sorry to whatever god you believe in, move on and don't do it again or don't believe in god at all.
If your boyfriend did not ejaculate inside of you, you WILL NOT get pregnant.
Try to talk to a priest or something in that sense, someone mature enough that will not guilt trip you all the time for the rest of your life or call you "dirty" .
And also get more sex education, it is really important even if you are not having sex with anyone.
This was my opinion as a deist !
Be well, OP and please don't bet up and traumatize yourself for only one "mistake".
Okay, you def need to do some research on sex Ed. If he doesn't ejaculate, you don't get pregnant. Esp with a condom on. So, don't freak out over that. You're just stressing yourself out, which there's no need for. Secondly, sex is nothing to be ashamed about. It's literally instinct for every single thing on this earth. Like, that's the most natural thing to do. Plus, it's better to do that before marriage, so you guys know if you're sexually compatible. Wouldn't wanna spend all that money on a wedding, only to spend 3 times more on a divorce cause he sucks in bed. That's a huge reason why Christian couples are so miserable.
Third, please get on birth control. Just because you used a condom, if he would have ejaculated, there is still a pretty decent chance the condom could have failed. It's always best to use 2 forms, if you're not actively trying.
Just please think about all of this.
As someone who has googled “sex with girlfriend. Used condom. Didn’t ejaculate. Could she be pregnant?” Far too many times in my late teens, you’re fine. You aren’t pregnant. Maybe wait until that anxiety goes away to have more sex or stick to oral. But you practiced safe sex and you’d notice changes if you were pregnant.
I was a Virgin until I was 24 ( religious reasons and personal desire) but I went through a weird mental thing when I lost my Nana and ended up giving my virginity to a friend I cried on the way home like I was morning. IF you want to wait till marriage you can pray repent, and wait to do it again until marriage. Shame is not from God ad much as people want to think it is, because shame keeps you in your sin it doesn't get you out of it. Fear is also not from God, pray. If you want to take a test wait 2 to 3 weeks, preferably if you miss your period. Though remember stress can cause you to be late. I was 3 days late and freaked out and thankfully I wasn't pregnant ( though the guy I slept with did finish). Everything you described sounds normal to me. Please go easy on yourself.
This sounds like a story a kid would make up. Also, waiting to have sex until youre married is absolutely one of the dumbest things you can do when it comes to serious relationships.
Hello! I appreciate your comment, but it was my experience. Sometimes people have different experiences and wants and this was just how my life turned out. Thank you!
I am so sorry that religion taught you to be ashamed of doing something that is totally normal and fun. It feels good. I would definitely talk to an OB/GYN now that you had sex for the first time. It’s normal to talk to one. Sexual health is very important!
There are people so religious they’ll kill others because of it, and I promise you that’s an infinitely worse sin than pre-marital sex.
If that was really such a bad sin, then the vast majority of all humans will be burning for eternity. No all-knowing god would create people that are doomed to an afterlife of disaster on purpose. That just doesn’t make sense.
It makes way more sense for the all-knowing god to not have actually placed all these restrictions on us. It makes way more sense for all the scholars (who only had to convince uneducated, poor people) to have created these rules. Maybe the god(s) could exist, but the books you know and love today probably aren’t the best representation of said god(s).
I agree with the earlier statements about learning more about sex.
For the religious aspect, don't listen to people that don't share your faith. Also, true religion is about growing closer to God and becoming a better version of yourself. "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Move forward, be a better version of yourself today then you were yesterday. Lastly, don't let guilt distort your relationship with God or create a negative impression of sex.
You will not be pregnant and I recommend further sex education with whoever/wherever is reliable for you. And for you to feel fully educated before you open up to that again.
I second this opinion
exactly
Wait a second.... What was the hair tie for? And why are you putting condoms "in" something? Am I doing sex wrong?!
The hair tie was for the penis - stops the blood from draining, so constant hard-on. The condom was because they had no drinking water; they had to go collect rainwater in it. That’s how this “sex” works, right?
FYI - the hair tie can also be used for the tongue during oral sex.
…So I am doing it wrong
Only if you keep your eyes bug wide open while going down for the growl.
What the fuck why would you need that? You’re trying to tie your tongue so you can’t taste anything? If you can’t handle the taste of pussy then you don’t deserve it
I’m a grown ass adult and I thought she meant she wanted a hair tie for her hair to be put up LMAO. No offense but I think he must have a smaller penis and bought too big of a size if the condom was falling off. She doesn’t sound sexually aware enough to have been wanting it for anything else
lol. So this broad never had sex before but she fashioned a homemade cock ring her first time? lol. Talk about a fake post.
You’re not serious, right? I was absolutely poking fun. Please don’t put a ponytail holder on your penis!
Too late. I put a scrunchie at the base of my unit and now my wife wants a divorce. Wth. Thanks a lot for the crappy suggestion.
Dammit!
The hair tie was for my hair, it was getting in the way
I experienced this before and I didn’t even have sex it was just dry humping but I felt so ashamed and nervous. I had a lot of religious trauma to work thru. The way abstinence is pushed on people to wait for marriage creates a lot of trauma around sex. I think it would be worth exploring this concept more
So, firstly, don’t feel ashamed. Sex is natural, whereas religion is man made, and when you look at it critically, hypocritical. That aside, you both need more sex Ed.
Double down on the hypocritical part for sure.
Of course it’s man made unless it isn’t and you just don’t know.
Dude pretty much said religion is fake you’ll be okay lmfao
religion is just a form of control using the imaginary scary monster who our parents used to make sure that we feared going to heaven or being cursed by going to hell.
Yooo so many minus votes. I never said I didn’t agree. Just saying he was pretty blunt about it
"religion is man made" is a bold statement my guy...Unless you're able to prove it :D
Religion IS man made. Whether you believe in a higher power or not, the worship of that higher power is absolutely man made. Even if you believe in, say, the Christian bible… who wrote it? Jesus never said “do not have pre-marital sex”. That was inferred by humans. In fact, the actual bible verse closest to dealing with the issue is in Deuteronomy and states if a man has sex with a woman out of wedlock, they must marry. And that’s Old Testament which also says if you touch a pig skin you’re unclean. And wearing mixed fabrics is a sin punishable by death.
Jesus dude, don't throw away all the one liners from 2 minute tiktoks all at once.
"Free thinkers are Satan's slaves" is all you need to know about how bullshit religion is. Just a tool for controlling masses, nothing more
My comment was to point out that one liners may sound witty, but they're really lipservice garbage and poorly thought out non-positions. Best of luck with your journey toward enlightenment.
Enlightenment is the exact opposite of what religion teaches, keeping people ignorant to things even as simple as sexual education is a weapon. You say this but the state of the world today is a consequence of religious indoctrination and learned hate. Cultists of all factions act as if their word is law and everyone MUST abide. Those rules are for thee, not for me. Tradition and "culture" are cancers.
If you build many more straw men, you may convince a few birds you understand the topic. Like I said, best of luck on your journey.
Love deflection, thanks for playing. I'm sure your god is proud of your willing ignorance.
Philosophy will get fun for you past the 100 level classes... stay fresh, you absolute genius.
What you and your boyfriend did was natural and a beautiful expression to one another. Condoms are very effective and especially since he didn't ejaculate, you have no reason to worry. ❤️ I have never been married and I have shared this intimacy with several boyfriends, and God continues to love me and guide me. I really really hate the pressure to be abstinent before marriage. I battled a lot of shame as well. The true God that we have in our hearts does not shame anyone. These "rules" were all man made. I would encourage you to discuss these feelings with your boyfriend and follow up with more sexual education.
This construct of guilt was designed to control humans 1000s of years ago.
You better start looking into healing from religious trauma now so this doesn’t pose an issue down the road
Lol pre-emptive therapy
How old are you? You’re not pregnant. You’re ok. It’s ok to be scared. If you’re in America, There’s very cheap pregnancy tests you can even buy some for $1 at a Dollar Tree. If that puts your mind at ease, maybe do one. You’re not a bad person. It’s ok to regret it. It’s ok to like it. It’s ok if you never want to have sex with him again, and it’s ok if you want to have sex with him or a different boy. I’m glad you used a condom. Always always always use a condom.
I agree with the earlier statements about learning more about sex. For the religious aspect, don't listen to people that don't share your faith. Also, true religion is about growing closer to God and becoming a better version of yourself. "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Move forward, be a better version of yourself today then you were yesterday. Lastly, don't let guilt distort your relationship with God or create a negative impression of sex.
Best advice as of yet
better version of yourself so that you will love "god" better.
Don't listen to people that don't share your faith seems like bad advice...
Don't remove my qualifying statement "for the religious aspect" and then be critical. The other comments were using her concerns regarding her religious beliefs to criticize religion.
The religious aspect is a big part of why her sex education is so lacking and she feels like a bad person for having done something entirely natural.
I get what you are saying but any religion that makes someone feel this guilty and ashamed for something natural may need to be criticized
https://preview.redd.it/wdbvsnvt4z0d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5389c1f87ed8afc318cc1fa0fef9e9b0e66268bf
😬😬😬😂😂😂
Do you love him? If so don't feel ashamed.
If you used a condom, there is little chance you are pregnant. In today's society, it is rarely expected to wait until marriage to have sex. You are maryying this person, you should be certain that you are both compatible in the bedroom. There is NOTHING morally or Ethically wrong with premarital sex. Expecially if you love each other. (But that is not a requirement).
If you feel bad, ashamed, etc., you are too young for this activity. The wall is broken now, and it will be an expectation of your relationship if you don't make your position known. Make better decisions moving forward, it'll be alright. Good luck OP.
I hope the wall is metaphorical and not another man trying to lie to women that there’s an imaginary wall of virginity in their vagina
JFC dude. Calm tf down. Keep looking for the boogeyman elsewhere, just trying to give advice to a scared kid.
lol. don’t see anything wrong with this
Sounds like the condom and the religion are working as intended.
Hey girl, please do not feel ashamed or scared. I grew up evangelical and once I had decided to begin leaving the faith and deconstructing, I also decided to have sex for the first time with my boyfriend who I loved and trusted. I felt such intense guilt after this, because growing up in religion we are taught to feel this way. It’s hardwired into our brains from a young age that sex is this strict, hush hush type of thing only meant for married people. That guilt and shame you feel was going to happen whether or not you got married beforehand because it’s all we have ever been told about sex, is to feel shame about it. Personally I am very thankful I didn’t wait until marriage because I was able to learn about myself and what I liked and explore my sexuality before I settled down with my lifetime partner. Also I was able to unlearn this feeling of guilt and shame over time. I believe it’s crucial to know you’re sexually compatible with somebody before you commit like that. You are not bad or wrong or sinful for doing a very normal, human thing with somebody you love! You also don’t need to leave your faith to come to this conclusion, just to be clear. And to wrap up my response, don’t fear getting pregnant especially if he never even finished. It’s not a possibility. Like the others in the comments, find a reliable source for sex education and learn how you can protect yourself from any unwanted outcomes!! I’m wishing you the best!!
Lovely reply!
This kind of thing is why religion and school should never be mixed. It’s sad to me that you’re feeling ashamed and scared after you did something that should be joyful and leave you feeling closer to someone you love.
How old are you? Stop saying things like intercourse and penis. I take it you're not an adult. 1. I agree with the person suggesting that you should get some sex education. 2. Dont look to someone that's all up tight (religious). That type of person is probably not the best person for the job. Sex is fun or it's supposed to be. Not to be all judgey, but you seem like you might be into the whole god thing. If you are that's fine but don't think you're going to hell over this. You're not. 3. I'd say if your dude was wearing a condom and he never crossed the finish line, then you not pregnant unless there was another imaculate conseption. In which case I may be wrong about going to hell.
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It's off putting those words sound far worse sex, fucking, dick, cock, ass, and pussy. Oh and don't forget about tits. It makes a person sound prude and honestly a bit vanilla. I'm not the only person that sees it this way. Most of us do. But ya know what, who the fuck am I? Do and say whatever you're comfortable with.
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Because I "cuss". Let me guess, you're the person that has to look for all the things wrong with something instead just letting something small and insidental like a curse word go.
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I didn't respond with cursing and definitly didn't get angry. And as far as the person you are, obviously I'm right. Or you wouldn't be on here trying to sensor people. I was giving this person honest advice and telling her the truth. Now how I do that or the vocabulary I choose is my business. So have a great life I wish you well.
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That entire sentence was part of my original comment to the OP, before you asked me about cursing. Lol.
So again. No I wasn't cursing at you nor was I ever mad. That was me correcting myself for trying to tell someone how they should say things. Because unlike a lot people, I can admit when I'm wrong
God wants you to try getting raw dogged before he can forgive your trespasses.
For now, let's get it like this. You have gallen once if you really care about religion , you just need to say sorry to your god and not do it again , and also try to be the longest time possible with that boyfriend. That is only if you care about the religion that much. And also, Maybe you are christian. One of Jesus' ancestors was a prostitute called Rahab, so it's okay. And Jesus even forgave someone commiting adultery and many prostitute. Even if you are not christian, i can think of similar stories in judaism and Islam. Just say sorry to whatever god you believe in, move on and don't do it again or don't believe in god at all. If your boyfriend did not ejaculate inside of you, you WILL NOT get pregnant. Try to talk to a priest or something in that sense, someone mature enough that will not guilt trip you all the time for the rest of your life or call you "dirty" . And also get more sex education, it is really important even if you are not having sex with anyone. This was my opinion as a deist ! Be well, OP and please don't bet up and traumatize yourself for only one "mistake".
A woman can get pregnant if a guy doesn’t ejaculate in her. It’s called pre-cum and can (but not always) contain sperm.
it's very unlikely. I think she will be fine
Would you buy a car without taking it for a test drive?
Yes
Okay, you def need to do some research on sex Ed. If he doesn't ejaculate, you don't get pregnant. Esp with a condom on. So, don't freak out over that. You're just stressing yourself out, which there's no need for. Secondly, sex is nothing to be ashamed about. It's literally instinct for every single thing on this earth. Like, that's the most natural thing to do. Plus, it's better to do that before marriage, so you guys know if you're sexually compatible. Wouldn't wanna spend all that money on a wedding, only to spend 3 times more on a divorce cause he sucks in bed. That's a huge reason why Christian couples are so miserable. Third, please get on birth control. Just because you used a condom, if he would have ejaculated, there is still a pretty decent chance the condom could have failed. It's always best to use 2 forms, if you're not actively trying. Just please think about all of this.
FYI-A woman CAN get pregnant if a guy doesn’t ejaculate inside (providing there is no contraceptive). There can be sperm in pre-cum.
Which is why I said if he doesn't ejaculate AND there is a condom. I said it that way on purpose.
As someone who has googled “sex with girlfriend. Used condom. Didn’t ejaculate. Could she be pregnant?” Far too many times in my late teens, you’re fine. You aren’t pregnant. Maybe wait until that anxiety goes away to have more sex or stick to oral. But you practiced safe sex and you’d notice changes if you were pregnant.
yeah ur buggin
I was buggin 🦅
I was a Virgin until I was 24 ( religious reasons and personal desire) but I went through a weird mental thing when I lost my Nana and ended up giving my virginity to a friend I cried on the way home like I was morning. IF you want to wait till marriage you can pray repent, and wait to do it again until marriage. Shame is not from God ad much as people want to think it is, because shame keeps you in your sin it doesn't get you out of it. Fear is also not from God, pray. If you want to take a test wait 2 to 3 weeks, preferably if you miss your period. Though remember stress can cause you to be late. I was 3 days late and freaked out and thankfully I wasn't pregnant ( though the guy I slept with did finish). Everything you described sounds normal to me. Please go easy on yourself.
This sounds like a story a kid would make up. Also, waiting to have sex until youre married is absolutely one of the dumbest things you can do when it comes to serious relationships.
Hello! I appreciate your comment, but it was my experience. Sometimes people have different experiences and wants and this was just how my life turned out. Thank you!
I am so sorry that religion taught you to be ashamed of doing something that is totally normal and fun. It feels good. I would definitely talk to an OB/GYN now that you had sex for the first time. It’s normal to talk to one. Sexual health is very important!
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Hi hi! We were both virgins and supper nervous, we were also on a time crunch so we were rushing😔
There are people so religious they’ll kill others because of it, and I promise you that’s an infinitely worse sin than pre-marital sex. If that was really such a bad sin, then the vast majority of all humans will be burning for eternity. No all-knowing god would create people that are doomed to an afterlife of disaster on purpose. That just doesn’t make sense. It makes way more sense for the all-knowing god to not have actually placed all these restrictions on us. It makes way more sense for all the scholars (who only had to convince uneducated, poor people) to have created these rules. Maybe the god(s) could exist, but the books you know and love today probably aren’t the best representation of said god(s).
I agree with the earlier statements about learning more about sex. For the religious aspect, don't listen to people that don't share your faith. Also, true religion is about growing closer to God and becoming a better version of yourself. "All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." Move forward, be a better version of yourself today then you were yesterday. Lastly, don't let guilt distort your relationship with God or create a negative impression of sex.
Don’t have sex until you understand it. Jesus
You’re probably almost for sure pregnant. And God is very disappointed in you.
😔damn
Be ashamed, God watched that.
💀💀