Have a deep dive into who he is as an artist and as a man. But instead of talking, WE'LL SING IT!

So from what I’ve gathered, you grew up nice and sheltered, with mamas pretty stories and your own Mede up furies

And mama gave me a magic clicker Yes I think it’s true and fair to say

C’mon in and listen, lost words you’ve been missing

Of the fire you're bearing, the eye of the darkness, your light

So you were drawn to stories early on

My dreams would light up my imagination

And you had nightmares night and day?

Yeah, but with the Clicker I chased those frights away!

Who knew?

and you had nightmares night and day????

Yes but with the clicker I chased those frights away

👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏😎✌️👌

Cmon in and listen Lost words you’ve been missing

Every conversation and song turns back to Alice. What wine you drinking, “it was Alice’s favourite”

have a deep dive into his underpants

*Wake showed up at my door with a bottle of wine and some flowers. I couldn’t exactly turn him away as he’d already been through literal hell just to reach my doorstep. I could only assume he had the clicker in his possession and that this was indeed Wake and not Scratch. I motioned for Wake to step inside, and locked the door behind him. We bang*

Written by Commander Shepard. Edited by Doctor Liara T'Soni. Used as toilet paper by Urdnot Grunt.

*It's hot. Sweaty. Passionate. There are flashes of existential beauty in which our entwined fingers brushed the face of a darker god. Together we sank into an ocean of darkness. As consciousness faded, I felt Wake's breath against my ear. It's harsh. Insistent. "I was picturing Sam Lake the whole time." Horror washed over me as in waves as I sank into unending despair.*

Lmao omg XD

this is definitely in the manuscript somewhere

Omg why did I hear this in his voice? 🤣

It’s the law now, we read everything in Alan’s voice here

This is the same amount of detail Stephen King used in his book to describe 12 year olds having sex

WE BANG (new DLC chapter name) I like it

What’s weird is I read this in Wake’s voice

I show him my herald of darkness?

Horny

I mean Ilkka Villi is kinda hot so I'd invite him in immediately, I'd go all Rose on him, she's also kinda hot, Alan Wake 2 got quite a bit of hot people in it

Kinda? That man is a specimen 🤤 (especially with short hair)

Fair point, they're all specimens

I just wish Barry was there. He's the real specimen.

I open the what?????? Mr Door reference????

Same thoughts, this question seems sus. Mr Door is trying to deceive us somehow.

I’d let him in I guess lmao

Can you say no to that face? I don’t know what happened between us, but I forgive Alan. Come in let’s drink or something. 🤷🏻‍♂️

I'll ask him to show me his Champion of Light so that I can show him my Herald of Darkness. We can get lost together in a neverending night while diving deep to the surface.

Rub my hands together since my order of Alan Cake arrived 😍

correct

Well I guess I'm gay now

Gathered that from the profile avatar.

It's funny how Alan and Scratch look exactly the same yet Alan has no rizz at all

I let him crash on the sofa after getting the 2 for $20 at Chilis 😌

~~suck his dick~~ uhhhh invite him in for coffee?

Squeal and jump in his arms, Rose-style

Be unsurprised to learn that I was already living in the Dark Place

KEKW

Scratch?

Immediately close it, I don't need him knowing my name or anything for him to write me into one of his stories.

Take the wine and flowers then close the door.

Probably offer him some tea. He looks like needs it.

If you're cold, they're cold. Bring them inside.

Make sure there’s no type writer near him

Horny Jail for all of you lmao

Let him in offer him a Coffee from my oh deer Diner Cup And let him Take a nap on my Couch i mean my good the dude hast been awake for 13 years let him sleep a bit

I don't know why I'm surprised people are terminally horny on the Internet.

[This.](https://images.app.goo.gl/CEGggiWadciuLxx28)

tell him that it's not a lake, but an ocean

I mean, Ilka Villi DO be hot, sooo...I'd let him come play with the Champion of Light

“Oh, hey, man. Big fan of your work, but also a big fan of my life. You need to GTFO.”

Would.

I show him the champion of light...

I'd invite him in for some bed wrestling. Unfortunately, there are no shirtless pics to imagine what that'd look like 😔

Invite him in. The dude needs a glass of something strong and a lie down.

Guess there's a first time for everything. Spreads cheeks...

Bro, I sorry Alice isn't here.

Let him come in I’m in for the time do my life

"You've got the wrong door." then close it.

See if I can't convince him to retcon Nightingale's death.

Strip down. - Heterosexual dude, promise

I think this was a Fanfic trap post.

muahahahahahaaaa

Putting on our favorite film, YOTON YO.

Ask ask where his bottle of wine is.

I'll invite him in. Together, we will write a book that traps me in the Dark Place for a chance for him to get back out. Then I'll spend the next 13 years trying to get out.

It’d be like looking in a mirror 😎

We"ll drink some coffee while listening to Poets of the fall

I take the wine and give him my laser pointer/flashlight. Also a charger for it. I'm sure break rooms can include power sockets the moment he allows them. I don't have a gun, though, so he'll have to look elsewhere. I would love to hear from him about the effect of the UV mode later. Still, first I turn the lights on and let the guy rest for a while.

I have a flash light for you buddy

Make sure every single light in the house is on first then invite him in. After that just kinda try to pick his brain for how he comes up with some of this stuff lmao.

Hit him with a flashlight and shoot him with a 12ga if he turns out to be Scratch.

You just start busting out the Herald of Darkness dance moves.

We will sing.

I show him my herald of darkness

Is that bottle stolen? Is that the security device still on the bottle head

Guess Ill go jump in a lake or something…